The Hook Up

After being made redundant from his dream job as an investigative journalist, Bension Siebert turned to sex work to make money and surprised himself by how much he enjoyed it.In this ep, Bension chats to Dee about ‘coming out' with his new profession, the reaction online and what he's learnt about the industry.SHOW NOTES:Bension's Cheek Article - https://cheekmedia.substack.com/p/how-sex-work-saved-my-investigativeBension's IG - https://www.instagram.com/bensionfindsout/DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

We all know the phrase but does dating someone who's completely different to you actually work? In this ep, we hear your stories of dating people who are opposite in lifestyle, interests and core values, compared to people who've dated similar - and find out if compatibility can work both ways.SHOW NOTES:Why Do Opposites Attract?https://www.verywellmind.com/is-it-true-that-opposites-attract-in-relationships-5194818Global study on opposites do not attract:https://www.psypost.org/why-opposites-dont-attract-a-global-study-reveals-the-true-rules-of-romantic-compatibility/https://economictimes.indiatimes.com/news/international/us/why-opposites-dont-always-attract-a-global-study-of-41606-people-across-74-countries-found-shared-values-matter-most-while-believing-your-partner-is-kinder-and-more-attractive-predicts-happier-relationships/articleshow/132179722.cms?from=mdrPerceived similarities in couples:https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/02654075251349720?utm_source=chatgpt.comEffects of similarity of life goals, values, and personality on relationship satisfaction and stability:https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/j.1475-6811.2012.01417.x?utm_source=chatgpt.comDM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Going through heartbreak can be one of the most painful experiences and sometimes those break up scars don't leave - when you start dating again. So in this ep, we chat to Dr Marny Lishman about the walls we put up after being hurt, how to heal and trust in love again. SHOW NOTES:Break Up Podcast - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ac0wdFkrIUADr Marny Lishman - https://www.marnylishman.com.au/Only You: The Unexpected Gift Of Being Alone - https://www.marnylishman.com.au/booksDM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

We can all agree that break ups are a universally shit experience, whether it's a long term relationship or situationship. In this episode we're unpacking all the challenges and questions you have - should you go no contact? How long should you wait before hooking up with someone new? Are my friends sick of hearing about my heartbreak? And can a break up actually be a good thing for ~personal development~?SHOW NOTESBreakup Glowup - https://www.tiktok.com/@yourfree_therapy/video/7534079578067750164Rebound - https://breeze-wellbeing.com/blog/what-is-a-rebound-relationship/Marie Claire Glow Up - https://www.marieclaire.co.uk/news/science-behind-glow-ups-669161DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

There are millions of posts on TikTok all about ‘spicy books' and someone who's become famous for reviewing them is author and content creator Tierney Page.In this ep, she chats about why she thinks there's been a massive rise in people reading and posting about romantasy and smut, her fav tropes and genres and her journey to becoming an author. SHOW NOTES:watch our romantasy ep with Esme Louise James here - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MXKoC94haC4Tierney Page TikTok here - https://www.tiktok.com/@tierney.reads?lang=enDM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Whether you have or haven't read books like Heated Rivalry, A Court of Thorns and Roses or Fourth Wing, you can't deny the rise in smutty literature. In 2025 romantasy and sports romance experienced triple-digit growth.But there's been some criticism around how DR and romantasy books often glamourise SA and are too accessible for young readers. In today's episode Dee is joined by guest co-host Esme James, a sex historian and author, to discuss why we're all so obsessed with fantasy smut. SHOW NOTES:https://lighthouse.mq.edu.au/article/2026/feb-2026/romance-revival-why-we-love-stories-about-love?utm_source=chatgpt.comWhy romance novels thrive on tiktok - https://www.abc.net.au/news/2023-12-27/why-romance-and-romantasy-novels-are-so-popular-on-tiktok/103198518?utm_source=chatgpt.comEsme's book! https://www.simonandschuster.com/authors/Esme-Louise-James/244716193Dr Esme Louise James IG - https://www.instagram.com/esme.louisee/?hl=enDM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Whether it's drugs, alcohol, or gambling - addiction can be one of the hardest things to navigate in a relationship. In this episode we chat to clinical psychologist Donna Stambulich about her experience with amphetamine addiction, the impact it has on relationships and how to best support your partner or loved one. SHOW NOTES:Lifeline - 13 11 14 Donna Stambulich - https://nppsych.com.au/our-psychologistsRecode Me -  https://recode-me.com.au/Episode with Luke Bateman on Gambling - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KTl8Royc2rU&t=16sDM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

What's the bet you or someone you know has been affected by gambling? Probably pretty high. Around 3 million Australians experience some sort of gambling harm each year. And 1.2 million Australians are affected by someone else's gambling. And it can have a real impact on your dating or love life. In today's episode we speak with Luke Bateman, ex-NFL star turned author, about his past addiction and tips on reaching the other side. SHOW NOTES:Lifeline - 13 11 14Gambling Helpline - 1800 858 858Gambling Help Online - https://www.gamblinghelponline.org.au/Luke Bateman IG - https://www.instagram.com/lukebateman_/?hl=enLuke Bateman Australian Story - https://www.abc.net.au/news/2026-07-27/turning-the-page-luke-bateman/106963436Compulsive Gambling - https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/compulsive-gambling/symptoms-causes/syc-20355178The Psychology of Gambling Addiction: https://equilibriapcs.com/the-psychology-of-gambling-addiction-why-the-brain-craves-the-bet/Gambling Disorder Psychology: https://www.reachlink.com/advice/general/gambling-disorder-psychology/

Who has the right to tell queer stories and profit off them? That's the main theme author Josh Silver explores in his latest book Fruit Fly. The book follows a writer who befriends a young gay addict so she can use his story to write a best seller. In this ep, Dee chats to Josh about his own story as an ex addict, the world of chem sex parties, and why it's important to share perspectives of gay pain and trauma.SHOW NOTES: Lifeline: 13 11 14QLife: https://qlife.org.au/Josh Silver IG: https://www.instagram.com/joshsilverauthor/?hl=enFruit Fly: https://www.bloomsbury.com/au/fruit-fly-9781836432395/Melbourne event: https://www.wheelercentre.com/events-tickets/season-2026/josh-silver-fruit-flyBrisbane event: https://bwf.org.au/2026/brisbane-writers-festival/josh-silver-fruit-flyDM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Have you ever felt pressure to have a certain kind of sex? Sex positivity has been an incredible movement which has normalised and destigmatised adventurous, kinky and casual sex. But has that come at a cost? In this ep, we're joined by guest co-host psychologist and sexologist Laura Lee to unpack whether sex positivity and hook up culture has created a new type of pressure and expectation to perform.SHOW NOTES:A women's right to say ‘meh' - https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2015/oct/10/sex-positivity-sexuality-ambivalence-feminismHow sex positivity lost its way: https://katemanne.substack.com/p/how-sex-positivity-lost-its-wayHow Sexual information (CONT) : https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC9825060/5 ways to have better sex in a relationship - https://www.psychologytoday.com/au/blog/experimentations/201710/5-ways-have-better-sex-in-relationshipCouples' sexual communication and dimensions of sexual function: A meta-analysishttps://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC6699928/Fetish 101: Vanilla - https://www.hudapp.com/blog/fetish-101-vanillaHow the sexual revolution changed the world https://youtu.be/VdDERcyouWs?si=9icswXNioUtwZ3g0The canadian journal of human sexuality https://utppublishing.com/doi/full/10.3138/cjhs.2017-0017

Surprise! We've got a Saturday Bonus ep for you! You probably heard all about Ben Ilobuchi's situationship troubles in this weeks episode. But did you hear the beef? Dee becomes The Grill's first guest to sear some rogue relationship-specific beefs like ghosting, the ick, and having to sleep in a bed with your partner. DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

If you're dating, hooking up with, talking to, or seeing someone but you don't know where things are going and you don't know how to bring it up… Dating coach and author Erika Ettin has got you!In this ep, she has some tough love for anyone in a situationship, and will help you have the exclusive/relationship chat. SHOW NOTES:Situationship Ep: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=17Qr9ovC2N0Erika Ettin Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/alittlenudge/?hl=enDM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Are you dating or hooking up with someone right now and you're not really sure what's going on? It feels like a relationship but you've never had the ‘exclusive chat'. You might be in a situationship… In this episode Dee is joined by guest co-host Ben Ilobuchi to unravel the relationship limbo. Show notes:Deding and Describing Situationships: https://www.researchgate.net/publication/378872949_Defining_and_Describing_Situationships_An_Exploratory_InvestigationWorld Health Org: https://www.who.int/news/item/02-09-2025-over-a-billion-people-living-with-mental-health-conditions-services-require-urgent-scale-upDM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Have you noticed a pattern in your love life of ending things when a relationship starts to get serious? Or maybe you pick a fight, or ghost people or never commit to a second date. In this ep we chat to psychologist Dr Rebecca Ray about why we can sometimes self-sabotage and how to break that cycle.SHOW NOTES:Dr Rebecca Ray - https://rebeccaray.com.au/DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Whether it's someone's personality, physical attributes, career or aesthetic - sometimes we lean into a “type” of person who we're attracted to and want to date. But can it ever be discriminatory, fetishisation or limiting to potential relationships? We hear your hot takes and discuss with special guest host Lauren French.SHOW NOTESScientists Found Evidence That People Really Do Have a Dating Type: https://www.vice.com/en/article/scientists-found-evidence-that-people-really-do-have-a-dating-type/I Found Love When I Stopped Dating My Type: https://www.vice.com/en/article/i-found-love-when-i-stopped-dating-my-type/Mate Value: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mate_valueWhat is Love? Attraction explained : https://youtu.be/9kaZ79MQWrM?si=ogGLk4tGc6kV1HrlHow to change your type: https://www.bustle.com/p/if-you-have-a-relationship-type-experts-say-these-7-surprising-things-can-help-you-change-it-18190193DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

As much as we talk about sex on The Hook Up, for some people they have absolutely no interest in it. That's what it's like for writer, fashion girly, podcast host of Booksmart AND asexual baddie Allie Daisy King. In this ep Dee chat's to Allie about her sexuality journey realising she was ace, what it's like to live in a world that's so obsessed with hooking up and dating and why she still loves to read romantasy and smut books. SHOW NOTES:Allie's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/alliedaisyking/?hl=enExtra Virgin: https://www.youtube.com/@alliedaisykingACE book: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/52128695-aceDM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Doing the crossword together every week, writing letters to each other, mandatory date nights, surprise gifts, a commitment to a yearly getaway, and sleeping in separate beds. Whether you're only a few months in, or years deep - we all have ways to keep the relationship vibes high and healthy. In this ep, we hear your hacks, tricks, rules and methods, to keep your relationship thriving.SHOW NOTES:Harvard University research on importance of Rituals: https://www.library.hbs.edu/working-knowledge/rituals-strengthen-couples-here-s-why-they-re-good-for-business-tooPower of learning new things together:https://www.success.com/the-power-of-learning-new-things-togetherDM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn

Studies show that nearly 30% of Australians have experienced child sexual abuse - a horrific stat that award-winning activist and co-founder of the #YourReferenceAintRelevant campaign - Harrison James has been trying to change. In this ep, Dee chats to Harri about his activism, his survival of child sexual abuse and what's helped with healing. As well as what he's learnt from being in a loving and healthy relationship with his fiance Bella Johnston who actually joins us in the studio too!SHOW NOTES:Lifeline: 13 11 141800 RESPECT: 1800 737 732Harrison James IG: https://www.instagram.com/itsharrijames/?hl=enBella Johnston IG: https://www.instagram.com/spicyjohnston/?hl=enHarri's Book - Transform Your Pain Into Purpose: https://www.simonandschuster.com.au/books/Transform-Your-Pain-into-Purpose/Harrison-James/9781923293892DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Hooking up with your mate's ex might be one of the biggest violations in a friendship. But is it totally black and white, or are there some grey areas? We hear your hot takes and stories - from you giving your blessing to friends hiding the relationship, and when pursuing the ex has damaged friendships beyond repair and earnt you the nickname sloppy seconds.DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

When you hear about HIV you might think of the AIDs epidemic during the 80s. But so much has changed since then, including the invention of a prevention drug called PrEP. So how does it work? And is it just for gay men? In this chat with Professor Andrew Grulich who's the head of a HIV Epidemiology and Prevention program, we find out everything you need to know about Pre-Exposure Prophylaxis. SHOW NOTES:Professor Andrew Grulich - https://www.unsw.edu.au/staff/andrew-grulichhttps://www.kirby.unsw.edu.au/news/sexually-transmissible-infections-are-rise-australia-syphilis-rates-tripling-over-decadehttps://www1.racgp.org.au/newsgp/clinical/surge-in-most-stis-over-the-past-10-yearshttps://www.healthline.com/health/healthy-sex/talk-about-prep-hiv-aids#How-do-I-get-PrEPhttps://napwha.org.au/DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

They say it's one of the oldest professions in the world, and with sites like OnlyFans booming in popularity, getting into the industry is easier than ever before - but what is it like to date someone who does sex work? We hear your experiences of dating and relationships from the POV of SWers and as partners - from escorts, full service and erotic dancers, to online adult content creators, phone operators and companion services.SHOW NOTES:Melbourne Sexual Health Centre Annual Report: https://www.mshc.org.au/images/downloads/AnnualReports/MSHC_AnnualReport_2024.pdfDM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Over 20% of Australians live with a disability yet there's still so much stigma and misconceptions when it comes to their sex lives. That's something comedian and host Madeleine Stewart is trying to change in a new doco. We chat about what she's learnt about desire and pleasure - through her own experience as well as those she interviewed for the show. SHOW NOTES:Compass episode - Intimate Access: https://iview.abc.net.au/show/compass/series/40/video/RN2511H011S00Maddie's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/its_madeleine_stewart/Disability Advocacy Support Helpline: 1800 643 787Women Disability Australia: https://wwda.org.au/Touching Base: https://www.touchingbase.org/DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Did you know psychology has only existed for 147 years? For such a young science, it's had a huge impact on humanity and how we understand relationships, from Freudian theories to the pop psych infographics we see on social media every day. So we wanted to investigate it - where psychology came from, how it's evolved throughout time, some of the biggest myths and misconceptions, and what the future of psychology could look like.SHOW NOTES:A Brief History Of Psychology:https://www.verywellmind.com/a-brief-history-of-psychology-through-the-years-2795245A Brief History of Psychology: From Plato to Pavlov:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_qqwq8EmTY4Freud's life work and theorieshttps://www.verywellmind.com/sigmund-freud-his-life-work-and-theories-2795860The Jungian Shadow:https://www.thesap.org.uk/articles-on-jungian-psychology-2/about-analysis-and-therapy/the-shadow/Is Stockholm Syndrome A Myth?:https://www.abc.net.au/news/2023-08-23/is-stockholm-syndrome-a-myth/102738084Myth busting in psychologyhttps://www.scientificamerican.com/article/busting-big-myths/AI and Psychologyhttps://www.bps.org.uk/psychologist/what-if-we-world-become-too-entrenched-ever-evolving-techDM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Research shows women are out performing men in education, and are buying more houses - but at what cost to their love lives? We speak to author Stefanie O'Connell about her book The Ambition Penalty and her viral Guardian article about how more single women are buying more houses and how men aren't responding well.SHOW NOTES:Is Your Partner Intimidated By Your Success Podcast: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oAHdxsrCrRgGuardian article - https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2026/may/13/women-home-buyers-men-datingStefanie O'Connell website - https://tooambitious.com/The Ambition Penalty - https://tooambitious.com/book/Stefanie's Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/stefanieoconnell/?hl=enDM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Success looks different for everyone. Maybe you own property, or have built a great career. Maybe you're highly educated, well travelled, creative, ambitious or wealthy. But sometimes thriving in life can impact dating and relationships. We hear your stories, particularly as women, about when your success has become a problem when dating.SHOW NOTES:Single women are buying more houses. The men they are dating are not responding well: https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2026/may/13/women-home-buyers-men-datingDM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Saying I love you to someone can be such a huge thing - so how do you know when you actually feel it? And when is the right time to say it? Plus how do you deal when the person you love doesn't say it back. We answer all your questions about declaring your love with couples therapist Megan Kozak. 

These are the most feared words for any budding relationship. I Love You. Everyone's advice is always “just say it when you genuinely feel it!” which is great in theory, but hard in practice for so many reasons. In this episode we chat about the ILY timeframe, why you may or may not say it and how it should be said. DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

73% of you have dated someone where there's been a mismatch of PDA in your relationship. So what can you do if one of you loves physical touch and the other doesn't?We chat to couples therapist and sexologist Isiah McKimmie on how to navigate that mismatch, how to deal with feelings of rejection, and whether it's something you can work on or change. DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

How do you feel about holding hands, hugging, kissing and canoodling in public? Is it cringe or cute? We hear your stories about PDA - witnessing it in the wild, when there's been a mismatch in physical touch, and whether PDA has been lost.DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

People are emotionally, mentally and spiritually exhausted by dating apps, so much so that hundreds of thousands of swipers are deleting them. Now to try and “shake things up” Bumble is replacing the swipe function with AI matchmaking. We chat to Dr Raffaele Ciriello from the Uni of Sydney about some of the major issues of using AI to help you date, as well as the benefits.SHOW NOTES:Dr Raffaele Ciriello: https://profiles.sydney.edu.au/raffaele.cirielloBumble AI changes: https://www.nytimes.com/2026/05/14/well/bumble-swipe-feature-online-dating-apps.htmlDM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

We've all been through puberty. It was sometimes traumatic, mostly awkward, it even had its endearing moments - and going through it shaped the way we think about ourselves and how we show up in the world. In this ep, you share your puberty war stories, and we investigate the mysterious phenomenon called ‘second puberty'. Because, jump scare, it might not be over. SHOW NOTES:What Happens When You Stop The Pill: https://www.webmd.com/sex/birth-control/stopping-pill-10-ways-body-changesSecond pubertyhttps://www.healthline.com/health/second-puberty#summaryDM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

If you're LGBTQI+ and live rurally, it can be so hard to explore your sexuality or discover your identity, especially if you don't have any queer community nearby. In this ep, Dee chats to psychologist Dr Chris Cheers about how to find yourself and your people - if you live in a place that makes it hard to do that. SHOW NOTES:Lifeline: 13 11 14QLife: 1800 184 527Headspace: www.headspace.org.auDr Chris Cheers: https://www.chrischeers.com/DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Dating and relationships out bush is a pretty unique and sometimes challenging experience - everyone knows everyone's business, you bump into casual hook ups and exes at the local pub, there's pressure to fit the town culture and pressure to settle down with a partner even if you're incompatible. In this episode, we hear your stories of what it's like dating regional and rural.DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

How you're feeling emotionally has such an impact on your sex life. It can be hard to feel turned on or connect with people when you're feeling down, stressed or just numbness from the cooked state of the world. In this ep, Dee chats to sexologist Claire Diaz about how to reconnect to pleasure during hard times. SHOW NOTES:Claire Diaz: https://www.clairediazsexology.com/Lifeline: 13 11 14 DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Throughout most of history, marriage wasn't seen as something you did ‘for love'. We paired up for resources, family alliances and survival - so when did it change? In this episode, we explore the history of romantic love and how it's changed from ancient love poems and medieval knights, to Shakespeare and modern romcoms. DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

PMDD (aka premenstrual dysphoric disorder)  isn't ‘just PMS' - it can be completely debilitating and life changing. In this ep, Dee chats to debut author Emma Hardy about her new book Periodic Bitch and her experience living with it. Just a heads up we talk about suicidal ideation and depression (if this chat brings up anything please refer to the helplines below.SHOW NOTES:Lifeline - 13 11 1413YARN - 13 92 76Beyond Blue - 1300 22 4636Emma Hardy's panel at Melbourne Writers Festival: https://mwf.com.au/program/the-next-big-thing#authorPMDD episode with Dr Theresa: https://www.abc.net.au/triplej/programs/the-hook-up/pms-pmdd-premenstrual-dysphoric-disorder-help/103909192DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Daniel Foxx thinks you should break up with them over text. And that's not the only hot take from this week's guest. Fresh off his Australian stand up tour, the UK comedian and podcaster chats the state of dating apps, his furry-fantasies and gives some of his best advice for your dating dilemmas. instagram: @dnlfoxxwebsite: https://www.danielfoxx.co.uk/DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

What's the difference between lust, limerence and love? Can love be addictive? Is romantic love technically even real? And if love is so natural to humans then why do we struggle with it? These are just a few of the questions we get answered by world renowned evolutionary anthropologist Dr Anna Machin, an expert whose research focuses on why we love.SHOW NOTES:Your love stories pod ep: Is Monogamy natural? pod ep: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DmlHf6yvSb4Where you can find Dr Machin's work: https://annamachin.com/DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

The world is kind of cooked right now, so in the words of our lord and saviour Rihanna, we wanted to find love in a hopeless place. In this ep, you tell us your meet cutes and epic love stories from platonic to romantic and everything in between.DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Over 60% of you said you've hooked up with or dated someone you work with! But a lot of the time it can get really messy and end badly. So in this ep, Dee chats to couples therapist Jill Dzadey about how to do it well so you can avoid all the workplace drama. SHOW NOTES:Hooking Up With Co-Worker Vodcast Ep: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oYcu6rnGSmMJill Dzadey Website: https://freedomcouplecounselling.com/DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

According to some surveys, over 60% of people have had a workplace romance - which has worked out really well for some, but for others it's gotten super messy. We hear your stories to find out how you've hooked up or dated colleagues, and if it's worth shitting where you eat.DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

For years women and people with eggs have been told they have a ‘biological clock' when it comes to their fertility, but how true is that really? And does sperm have the same ‘clock'? In this ep, Dee chats to associate professor Dr Theresa Larkin on the latest research on infertility and why it's been so gendered. SHOW NOTES:Yes, men have a biological clock too. But it's not just age that affects male fertilityWhat's the difference between sperm and semen? And can pre-ejaculate get you pregnant?DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.auThe Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.