Biohazard: The Report

Its a return of the librarian in this episode and our reporters give him a warm welcome. Wait. Where'd his hat go? Has anyone seen his little hat?

This report takes a hard stance on console controllers and Lunchables makes a comeback. Oh, and we talk about a movie I guess.

Our reporters are joined by Mars @cozygothmars and take a trip down memory lane to unearth some of their deepest darkest internet secrets. And to have an argument about water.

Our reporters welcome the return of the laser hallway, Claire Redfield, and clones, as they close out on the live action RE movies.

The ultimate battle begins... again... Will we ever forgive Paul for his transgressions? Perhaps not.

In which Claire and K-Mart are still our favorite characters, to no one's surprise. We're a little disappointed in this one Paul, but at least Alice gets a shotgun full of quarters.

After the carnage of Apocalypse, we are blessed with emotions from a genuinely enjoyable film. Celisse does a little recording goof-up, but we forgive her.

In which this film gets majorly dunked on and our reporters accidentally keep referring to characters by the wrong names.

In which Resident Evil is Celisse's first "horror" movie. But don't worry, she's played all the games. Sorry in advance to all the Chads out there; according to this film, you're not likely to survive the zombie apocalypse. Please excuse the audio quality as Thea used the worst possible mic to record most of this episode.