Year of the Kicker

The much anticipated and way overdue draft and power rankings recap. Enjoy

DRAFT WEEK! IT IS DRAFT WEEK, DO I NEED TO REPEAT MYSELF? BECAUSE I WILL. IT IS DRAFT WEEK! TELL THE BOSS ON FRIDAY YOU AREN'T FEELING WELL, TELL THE MISSUS THAT YOU HAVE OBLIGATIONS THIS WEEK, NEGLECT ALL OTHER THINGS BECAUSE IT IS DRAFT WEEK! AND YES, THIS CAPTION HAS MORE ENERGY THAN THE POD, BUT WHO GIVES A SHIT BECAUSE IT IS DRAFT WEEK!

That's right Alaska, we are back, and back in a big way. We have been training this offseason, improving our craft, and we absolutely did not improve the audio quality. We refuse to give into peer pressure! Anyways, pop those headphones in, sit back, and enjoy, because you deserve it.

People doubted us. Critics said it would never last. Well guess what, we made it to 20 episodes today. That's right, 20 episodes with god awful audio quality, minimal preparation, and a whole lot of year of the kicker banter. And isn't that what it's all about. The only thing I neglect more than the editing of these episodes are these descriptions that only Evan reads. In past episodes, we have given signals to league members to post in the group to prove they listen. Well I got a new one for you. Prove that you actually read these episode descriptions. That's right, show me your worth. If you actually read these descriptions, I want you to follow these instructions. Go into the group chat. write one sentence about any football player that was on your fantasy team this year. It can be anything, but must be one sentence. Also, put quotations around the sentence and pretend its a quote. You can write any person. "Anything can be a quote" -shakira. See, just like that. Okay, that is all. You can stop reading now.

PLAYOFFS ARE HERE! Well, not for everyone (sad face). I would like to take this moment to recognize those who are not in the playoffs. I emphasize with you all. Just collect those tears, store them in a jar and right before draft day next year, drink that jar. Why? Because I told you to! That's why! It is scientifically proven that tears are the perfect fuel for revenge. Get your mason jars ready boys, because the playoffs are here.

The playoffs are set and rather than congratulating those in the playoffs, I would like to offer my condolences to all those who didn't make it. Evan, you put your heart into this year, and well, I'm officially joining the team Shadillac bandwagon for next year. Rooting for you. Peter, tough one, but hey, you got the ship last year. Nick, I know law school is tough, but it won't be as tough as the 6/12/18/24 challenge. I wish you the best. Bruce, you're still and always will be the rookie of the league, and all I can say is....doesn't really matter since he doesn't listen. Luke, your team had the best chance of all of us and you went off and got married and neglected your team. I expect a rebound. And then there is me. It's going to be a long winter. Brace yourselves men.

Hello fellow league mates, parents of league mates, and people with no affiliation with the league (you're the real heroes). Boy do we have a juicy episode for you this week. Okay, it's not that juicy. I lied. Well, depends on your definition of juicy. You might be thinking, Charlie, why didn't you just change your wording and take out the part about the episode being juicy. Good question you curious little devil you. To answer your question, if you haven't noticed, these episode descriptions really have very little to do with the episode and have more to do with my random train of thoughts. Also my backspace button is broken. That also contributes to this mess. Are you still reading this? What're you doing?!?!?! Listen to the episode already, you won't regret it, I promise.

The podcast is back and we have a good one for you. We finally have our first official/unofficial sponsor for the pod. Fall Guys (Bobo and I just won a crown, if you know you know). So yeah, I guess you could say we made it to the big time. And I know what you're thinking. You're worried that we are going to forget where we came from, not going to be able to stay humble, etc etc. Not true at all. We will still be able to be humble, emphasis on be able to. Does that mean we will. Hell no! Forget you losers. We're social climbing are way to the top. Make an appointment with our secretary if you want to talk to us. His name's Kevin (That's right, breaking gender stereotypes, you go Kev!) Well anyways, now you're picturing a guy named Kevin with a headset on. You're welcome for that imagery. Listen to the pod. Kevin would want you to

"WHERE HAVE YOU GUYS BEEN?!?!" Don't worry about it, we're back, and the children are happy again. We took a little hiatus, but fear not, weekly episodes will be resuming. Evan's mental state is directly correlated with how often we post. You're welcome Ev, this one's for you. Well, we don't really talk about Evan much in this one, so if you're reading this description and think this is an episode about Evan, I'm sorry to inform you, but you've been BAMBOOZLED! Stop reading and start listening you loyal fan. It's the best time of the week.

"Yeah". You're gonna hear that word a lot. It was a late Monday night recording, the hosts may or may not have taken sleepy tea before. It's all speculation. Anyways, suck it up, we do this shit for free. Also, disclaimer, if you are a parent of one of the league members, Bobo recommends that you do not listen to this episode. Maybe he's using reverse psychology and actually wants you to listen. Trippy, right? Anyways, time is a social construct, so enjoy the 97 minetts (My version of minutes) of your favorite (or a close second favorite) podcast.