It's Not You, It's Dating

Michaela and Patrick knock out their 10th episode with not one, but TWO guests in an “All Question Episode.” In today’s episode we have the following listener questions: What to do when you get Covid and ghosted? Red flags versus deal breakers on apartment cleanliness and living standards? How to react when you send a sexy photo and they just reply, “hot.” Is it a good or bad idea to take a new partner on a trip? Keeping their identities a low profile, we have “Grant & Laura” join us for today’s episode. These two guests have shared countless relationship conversations with Michaela during their lunch table discussions while working on a film. Patrick and Laura have also had their fair share of dating chats over the years — so it was time to bring these two on to share the love. You can share the love too by sharing this episode with friends, partners, family and even those ghosters too. [Email: notyoupod@gmail.com to submit your dating or relationship question or DM @itsnotyouitsdating on Instagram.] Subscribe to the It's Not You, It's Dating Podcast on Apple Podcasts: itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/ --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/notyoupod/support

Guest, Jan Yuhas, M.A., MFT, CPC, joins Michaela and Patrick to tackle “Are we being too picky?” when we hit the ground in the dating world. Jan and her twin sister, Jillian, are International Relationship & Lifestyle Coaches and the founders of Entwined Lifestyle. Today, Jan tells us how she helps her clients discover their core values in relationships and align with successful dating practices. So, are we being too picky? What if there’s no spark? How long should we give it a shot before we move onto something new? Are we constantly wondering if the grass is always greener? — Jan helps us answer all of the above and more on today’s episode. Patrick, Michaela and Jan then dive into emailer questions. First, they answer a hard hitting relationship topic from a female listener: “how do I communicate with a guy when he starts distancing himself from me?” Later, another listener asks what to do with the “700 dating app matches” he’s saved up from a year of swiping during the covid pandemic — where do we even begin?! [Email: notyoupod@gmail.com to submit your dating or relationship question or DM @itsnotyouitsdating on Instagram.] Subscribe to the It's Not You, It's Dating Podcast on Apple Podcasts: itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/ More about Entwined Lifestyle: Jan Yuhas and Jillian Yuhas, MA, MFT, CPC, are International Relationship & Lifestyle Coaches and founders of Entwined Lifestyle. They are creators of the Relationship Intelligence Method and Boundary Badass Program. They have made it their mission to inspire professionals to create remarkable relationships, live fulfilling lifestyles, and set boundaries like a badass. You can find them at entwinedlifestyle.com or on IG/FB @entwinedlifestyle. --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/notyoupod/support

What are the best texting practices? Opening liners for dating apps? Pen pal texting versus texting to meet in person? Double texting? Good morning texts? Guest, Jon Bauer (@heyjb__), goes through it all with Patrick and Michaela on all things regarding “Rules of Engagement” on today’s episode. Later, they answer a listener question on best and worst types of food for dinner dates. Does a messy cuisine make or break a date? Another listener asks, “What does it mean when he makes our second date a double date and wants me to bring a single girlfriend for his friend?” Does this mean he’s trying to be casual? And when do we introduce our dates to our friends? [Email: notyoupod@gmail.com to submit your dating or relationship question or DM @itsnotyouitsdating on Instagram.] Subscribe to the It's Not You, It's Dating Podcast on Apple Podcasts: itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/ --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/notyoupod/support

When it comes to picking up the tab, let’s draw the line — when are we “being chivalrous” and when are we getting taken advantage of? Is chivalry dead, too antiquated for 2021? When does the other person start footing the bill, when do we split it? Patrick and Michaela dive into all of the above, including purse pumps and dinosaur arms, and the timeline of “courting” in regards to finances. Then the two get into emailer questions — one listener wants to know if he needs to cut things off completely with someone he’s not sure he wants something serious with. Another listener asks about “negging” and Michaela dishes on her reading of the pickup artist culture. [Email: notyoupod@gmail.com to submit your dating or relationship question or DM @itsnotyouitsdating on Instagram.] Subscribe to the It's Not You, It's Dating Podcast on Apple Podcasts: itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/ --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/notyoupod/support

In this episode, Kathryn Junius (a.k.a. "Nurse KJ") is back with us to discuss another sex topic: Is squirting real? When does it happen? What is it? Can only certain people do it? Michaela drops a few researched details about squirting and KJ and Patrick discuss a few personal stories on the topic. Then they get into an emailer question about bringing sex toys into the bedroom after a 5th date. Do sex toys mean the sex isn’t good enough? Is the 5th date too soon to incorporate toys? Finally, another listener asks, “How can I be taken seriously/not be seen as a ‘hook up’ if we had sex on the first date?” Can you have a serious relationship after hopping in the sheets on the first meeting? [Email: notyoupod@gmail.com to submit your dating or relationship question or DM @itsnotyouitsdating on Instagram.] Subscribe to the It's Not You, It's Dating Podcast on Apple Podcasts: itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/ --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/notyoupod/support

BUCKLE YOUR SEATS LADIES AND GENTS. ** Warning: Parents, please don’t listen to this episode **

Michaela and Patrick fly solo on the mic this week. It’s a quickie episode, but a vital one— they tackle one important listener question: “How do you date multiple people?” Michaela gets heated in talking about the *WHY* regarding dating more than one person at a time. Then they get into— What do you do when the person you’re dating asks if you’re seeing other people? And finally, "Can I juggle multiple sexual partners?" [Email: notyoupod@gmail.com to submit your dating or relationship question or DM @itsnotyouitsdating on Instagram.] Subscribe to the It's Not You, It's Dating Podcast on Apple Podcasts: itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/ --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/notyoupod/support

Let’s talk about dropping the L-Bomb; with the help of Catherine Cox (@healthycathycooks), Patrick and Michaela dive into saying “I love you” for the first time in a relationship. They explore the ILY timeline, who says it first, love languages, and the vulnerable thoughts in the aftermath of dropping the L-word. Later, the three answer a few emailer questions. With “Covid dating life,” one listener finds his relationship moving at a faster than normal pace— So, “How do you avoid going from 0 to 100 with dating right now?” Another listener asks how to “sit back and enjoy the ride” in her long term relationship, seeing that many people have feelings of monotony and disconnection down the road. The last emailer asks about what to do when she hasn’t heard from the guy she’s been dating in a few days — how many days is too many days not to text? [Email: notyoupod@gmail.com to submit your dating or relationship question or DM @itsnotyouitsdating on Instagram.] Subscribe to the It's Not You, It's Dating Podcast on Apple Podcasts: itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/ --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/notyoupod/support

Garin Flowers (@garinflowers) joins Patrick and Michaela as their first guest on the podcast! Garin talks about his current dating situation after coming off Season 16 of the Bachelorette with Clare Crawley. The episode discusses dating with a clearer mindset: Are you dating to just have fun or for a serious relationship?; it’s okay to want either— but be honest with the other person (and be honest with yourself). Then they dive into the significance of dating without tunnel vision or "playing the Bachelorette/Bachelor" for yourself. Patrick, Michaela, and Garin then answer a few listener questions— one listener wants to know how to stop adapting her personality to gain the approval of men while dating. Another person asks how to navigate the “friend zone” when an old friend finally becomes single. The final emailer question tackles the challenge of having a partner with an opposite schedule. [Email: notyoupod@gmail.com to submit your dating or relationship question or DM @itsnotyouitsdating on Instagram.] Subscribe to the It's Not You, It's Dating Podcast on Apple Podcasts: itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/ --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/notyoupod/support

Co-hosts, Michaela and Patrick start off their first podcast episode by introducing themselves, followed by a conversation about their dating/relationship statuses. They dive into a couple emailer questions; one listener asks how to deal with her significant other's close female friends - "Why would my boyfriend give another girl this much attention?" Then another emailer asks if it’s normal to message someone on Instagram or Snapchat if it's listed on their dating profile. [Email: notyoupod@gmail.com to submit your dating or relationship question or DM @itsnotyouitsdating on Instagram.] --- Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/notyoupod/support