I Understand Nothing

EPISODE 5, WE'RE STILL ALIVE! Our heroes are back after a two-month hiatus to deliver two segments because three would've been too much humor to handle/edit. Kris couldn't even come up with a clever episode title, which one can (please) assume means that all of the cleverness and hilarity was left on the court within this week's podcast (read: this weak metaphor). Does anyone even read these? If you do, message/tweet/comment the phrase "KRIS WON THIS WEEK" @iunderstandnot on Instagram and Twitter, and we'll Venmo you a little somethin' somethin' okay love you byeeeee~

Episode 4, check out what's in store! For you! When you listen! To this podcast! Our heroes are back and finally ready to split the responsibilities of cutting and editing! Kinda! Kris and Steve answer some big ole questions about a Nickelodeon classic, review everyone's favorite indentured servitude simulator, answer some listener questions, and welcome a very special guest back! Lalala! It's 1:20 am! Kris needs to sleep!

Episode 3, you know what it be! In this latest installment, our heroes find themselves down a new daddy but up an old laddie. Through the tears, they conquer they fears and offer one another solace by discussing The Office (finally). But will calling on the aid of once friendly employees destroy these friends, one of whom called in? Confused yet? Try writing one of these.

Thanks to you all, our heroes experienced the taste of success with their first official episode last week. Unfortunately, they did what most first-time podcasters do after scoring a handful of downloads: they got cocky (and spendy). Steve bought two new laptops. Kris changed from off-brand to Quilted Northern. And Keith... well, his investment may be the largest one of all. Let’s just hope that these prideful idiots can keep you entertained for at least another week!

Welcome to our first official episode! Have a seat, come on in, or I don’t know… make yourself to home. This is our podcast. It’s really nice. So, what do you guys think, should we do the segments first or the intro first? Segments, let’s do the segments first. Okay. Do you have a preference, babe? First segment first? Totally your call, babe. Alright, well, let’s go then. First segment: ARE ALIENS REAL? Second segment: HOW MANY PIGEONS CAN YOU CARRY? Third segment: Listen to the first two segments first, babe. Hit us up on Twitter and Instagram @iunderstandnot for more of our nonsense. Love you, bye!

Let’s be real. We don’t know what we’re doing. At least we have nice-ish microphones from Amazon, so you know that audio is going to be crisp as hell! So please enjoy listening to us bumble and fumble and crumble for an hour or so. Don’t forget to follow us on Twitter and Instagram @iunderstandnot for updates after we finally figure out what we’re doing. Love you, bye!