Rich Herring - Warming Up

Princess Diana Memorial and Southport based lies

My new hero and role model is the unbreakable Sepp Blatter. I also go to Redhill and rue Alfred Nobel's failure to destroy it.

I discuss the wonder of innocence, the terror of loss and the tiniest lloyds bank in the world. I don't need to tell you that that is Kenneth Blackburne, can't believe I didn't use him in my Ken based chicken routine

Even more frustration with BT Infinity. How long will this last? Clue in the name.

I try out a new smart watch and feel pleased with myself that I haven't gone with Apple (even though I slightly wish I had gone with Apple)

I want to work, but have been tired out and turned grey(er) by this happy little monster.

BT let me down again, even though I have an ology.

Back in Cheddar, reminiscing like a middle aged twazzock.

I multi-task like a motherflipper and keep 50% of the creatures in my life happy. Then to Taunton to perform for the incestuous people of Somerset, play Addams Family Pinball and mourn the loss of another icon from my childhood.

Self-playing snooker attempts to raise a million pounds and I think about Jack and the Beanstalk from the perspective of the old man who swapped his magic beans for a non-magic cow.

I am in charge of my daughter for most of the day. Can I keep her in one piece and undrowned (spoiler alert) yes.

We receive Welsh hospitality and poor customer service and I have to deal with a drunk man in an otherwise lovely gig.

In which I mourn the unproduced sitcom scripts I've written and steel myself to have another go.

Hungover and eating a breakfast of death. Then going to see a film that isn't really aimed at me, but which I still feel able to criticise.

Phoebe Doris Joy Herring is named Bright Gift Happy Fish and comes out as an unexpected Tory.

A day of good news, kickstarter success, script commission and a pretty much sold out DVD record!

First night at the Bloomsbury and I discuss the secret themes of the show. Photo by Steve Best.

The King of Edinburgh steps down with a churlish and childish boycott of the Fringe.

Best laugh ever.

The joy of witnessing a developing sense of humour.

My daughter celebrates her quarter birthday with tears.

The curse of Jimmy Savile nearly takes me from beyond the grave.

Post election slump.

We vote for a better future. But we don't get one.

Political quiz with tiny yellow lines and only the news that happen on the world.

Surprise at the Post Office.

4540 4 5 15 by Rich Herring - Warming Up

Crossing the Rubicon at parties and dressing like a dad.

My cat tries to mother or murder a tiny teddy bear. I do a hungover gig in a cinema where I need to climb a ladder to get on to the stage. Or maybe that was a dream. It sounds like a dream.

A drunken night out where I drink like a pornstar (though with less gametes- I hope) and don't miss my daughter one bit

I start booking in podcast guests and manage to make more online entertainment in spite of having no running water

A brave new internet world with a brand new newsletter and an attempt to kickstart some video RHLSTPS

I remember the acceptable face of showbiz Harrises, Keith.

I go to the cinema in the MORNING???? The world has turned upside down. Plus Holland and Barratt based embarrassment.

I catch up on some warming ups

I judge new young talent at the MET film school and feel glad that I am old and don't have all that competition to contend with.

I'm back! I propose some 21st century additions that are required when feeding a baby.

Phoebe joins me as I discuss her, Bath, Lord Bath and little Rusty Howard.

Hampton Court Palace, bickering in car parks on family outings and the sexist ghost of Henry VIII.

I go to Wales and eat seaweed with Captain America before falling in love with a muscly fireman and doing a whole show about a pinball machine.

Mitch Benn, Kevin Eldon, Penfold