UNBOYFRIENDABLE

In this episode, we're taking on hypergamy, a.k.a. the idea that "marrying up" is innate to all women. What does it look like in practice? Why does it make men hate women and women hate other women? Why are terminally online clusters of incels the only ones talking about it? Is it even real? What is "rizz?"

Tinder, Hinge, Bumble, etc., it's all so tiring. We recommend getting off of not just one of the apps, but ALL of the apps, getting outside, and meeting someone the old fashioned way. (Sending them psychic messages from across Kroger until they approach you to ask you out.)

This episode is about.... cheaters. (You probably could have guessed that from the title.) Listen. Enjoy. Tell your friends.

We're starting UNBOYFRIENDABLE 2.0 (Electric Boogaloo) off strong with a topic that the internet has already heard way too much about: Self-love—what's it mean? (Like for real and not some female you follow on IG using "self-love" to sell something or justify some mean girl behavior.) How can you use it to make not just yourself better, but a relationship, and how does self-knowledge play a role in determining boundaries? (I didn't listen to this back aside from spot-checking to fix levels, I hope it's not bad.)

Here's a topic I'm bad at, but would like to be better at. It's non-attachment: what does it mean? What does it look like in practice? Listen and you'll find out, I guess.

So, here we are: the topic no one wants to talk about but everyone knows all too well—JEALOUSY. Here's the case for it biologically and otherwise, because it actually ain't so bad. Listen to Dia Becker (@brokebutmoisturized) and I wax eloquently about our shortcomings and how we cope.

I'm back! And I have a topic that might be at least a little bit relevant to all of us: making the first move. What is it? Should you do it? How should you do it? (Along with some of my own ideas that are apparently very, very bad.) Is the first move simply the inciting move in a series of first moves? I'm joined by Dan Bassini (@danbassini) and Mallory Corr (@mallorycorr) to discuss.

So we've talked about relationships on here but how about the absence of relationships? As in... being UNBOYFRIENDABLE by choice? I get the 311 from my good friend Rebecca Siegel on what it's not the worst thing in the world to not be cuffed, how she's been just fine without a man (and thriving, I might add), and, of course, what it's like to put yourself out there after having not really done so to begin with. It's a good one.

What's romanticism? Why does it matter? Where is it going? I'm taking a look at what it means to live in a sort of "post-romantic" society and how we can determine which traditions we want to keep for ourself. (With a little help from Alain de Botton and The School of Life.)

**Apologies for audio issues throughout—it's an episode of embarrassing s*x stories so just pretend we're sharing casual bedroom lore via Zoom call. (Because that's what actually happened.)** This week, I'm joined by Mallory Corr. We're adding a moment of levity to a collectively darch epoch in time by talking about our worst one-night-stands.

Situationships: what are they? Are you an unwilling participant in one? Sola Onitiri (@nowletsgetgoing) and I discuss. Apologies if you learn something upsetting—it's all part of the process though, no?

The deadliest of my fatal flaws is my penchant for men who hate themselves. Let's take a look at how to identify this particular affliction, why it happens, and how to get better from it.

What's your attachment style? Dr. Ana—a.k.a. @armchairpsychiatrist from Thank You For This Consult—and I go through 'em in the most outdated (but relatable) way possible: categorizing them according to Sex and the City characters.

Why is E.M. Ricchini UNBOYFRIENDABLE? Why are you UNBOYFRIENDABLE? This new podcast from the gentler half of "Have a nice life." and the blogger behind LARK+LACE is bares it all and gets down to the dirty reasons why so many of us are undateable.