The Atheist Couple's Devotional

Imagine if a "This Old House" marathon was interrupted by a quick orgy in front of a golden baby cow before repeating the episodes you already watched. That's the last part of Exodus. Music by: Purple Planet

Interior design! Fashion design! Cooking advice! Blood Cult? No, this isn't the new, edgier Queer Eye. It's just God's terrible DIY and Lifestyle blog.Music by Purple Planet

Moses and his crew finally leave Egypt after 430 years. Imagine the world's worst road trip with no snacks, no water, and no idea when you're arriving. Also, we're pretty sure there's a volcano.Music by Purple Planet

We all know the story of Moses and the Plagues. But do you remember the part where God tried to murder Moses and Zipporah rubbed a bloody foreskin on Moses' feet? Yeah. We didn't either.We're starting Exodus today, and it gets real weird real fast.Music by Purple Planet

If your life goal is to insult all of your children one by one on your deathbed, the end of Genesis is the story for you.This week, we wrap up the first book of the Bible with humor, confusion, and a random serious moment about how Krystal became an atheist.Music by Purple Planet

It's extreme makeover, Genesis edition! That's right, we finish Jacob's story and move on to Joseph and his glow-up!Music by: Purple PlanetContent Warning for: Discussions of rape, slavery, and abuse.

Jealous wives, manipulative brothers, and a homoerotic wrestling match. Sounds like daytime soaps, but it's really just the Old Testament.Warning: this episode covers issues of rape, denial of bodily autonomy, and slavery. Music by Purple Planet

Father Abraham had many sons, but he also profited off of letting his wife become a king's concubine--TWICE. This episode has it all: war, incest, slavery, GILFs, and lots of penis talk.Music by Purple Planet