Flat Bottom Girls

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Self Loathe with Maddy Smith and Jordan Jensen

Maddy Smith and Jordan Jensen


    • Apr 7, 2021 LATEST EPISODE
    • weekly NEW EPISODES
    • 58m AVG DURATION
    • 47 EPISODES


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    Latest episodes from Flat Bottom Girls

    Sex is supposed to be ... fun?!

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 7, 2021 68:07


    The girls sit down with Wendi Starling to talk about sex, non-monogamy, and body dysmorphia. Wendi is a NYC-based comedian, recently relocated to St. Louis during the pandemic, and might move to Austin in the future, and has many tales to share about her dating life. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

    Don't Hate me, I'll Hate me

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 22, 2021 65:16


    Remy Kassimer host of the well renowned podcast, How Cum joins FBG to talk meltdowns at the in-laws, the bachelor, and what it means to finally realize we don't give a f*ck what men think of us. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

    Post Pandemic Makeovers

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 15, 2021 57:10


    Maddy gets headshots and Jordan gets Vaccinated. The girls discuss the futility of adult bullying, internet trolls, cat callers, gen z and how they possibly might consider looking presentable post covid. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

    Flat Bottom King

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 9, 2021 60:49


    The hilarious Raanan Hershberg tells the FB girls about getting the vaccine and how it destroyed his self esteem. They discuss dating without getting blasted on Twitter, anti-depressants and a million dollar idea for a dating app for people who hate sex. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

    Catching the "ICK"

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 1, 2021 50:35


    Maddy and Jordan go through the things that men do that make them run for hills of Cringe and flee to the lands of We Must Breakup Immediately. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

    Sagalow and the Horrible Hosts

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 23, 2021 54:45


    This week Brendan Sagalow joins us and we talk about the horrors of being on a strangers podcasts, being children of divorce, Valentines day meltdowns and Brendan's new "haircut" Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

    Sex Laundry

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 15, 2021 37:17


    Maddy and Jordan discuss the horrors of thongs and Jordan debriefs o about her love life. It's a shorty butt a goody. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

    Big Man on Campus

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 5, 2021 66:45


    The hilarious Casey James Solengo joins Maddy and Jordan this week to talk about the growing pains of hitting puberty at 21. When it comes to honesty about body shame the girls have met their match. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

    I'll Hate My Body If I Want To.

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 29, 2021 49:12


    This week Maddy and Jordan answer you perverts questions and discuss what should be feared and what shouldn't. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

    No Naked People w/ Chloe Radcliff

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 21, 2021 79:56


    Maddy and Jordan disturb their guest Chloe Radcliff with their repulsion to naked people. The episode starts off tame but goes widely off the rails into filthy terrain. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

    Astrology and Trauma-Bonding

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 14, 2021 41:31


    Libra vs Gemini. The manic co dependent vs the chill grudge holder. Can you guess who is who? We answer this and the rest of the questions you freaks sent in.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

    Quarrels In Quarantine

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 6, 2021 62:42


    This week we have Andrew Shivone! Host of the Anxiety Podcast as well as lover to our very own Maddy Smith. Andrew makes the critical folly of picking pre caffeinated fights. Jordan is still tragically single and tends to keep it that way. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    New Years Resolution: Don't Read the Comments

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 1, 2021 52:58


    Maddy and Jordan discuss their love/hate relationship with Tik Tok and the trolls that be. They answer all the questions you submitted last week and more. If you're a man with a dog sit this one out.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    Michael Rowland's Morning Rituals

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 18, 2020 53:49


    Comedy Central’s Michael Rowland and Jordan describes his quarentine rituals. Jordan decides she hates sex and Maddy hasn’t left her apartment. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    Carmen Lagala's FIRE Skincare Routine

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 2, 2020 65:55


    Carmen Lagala (Late Show with Stephen Colbert) joins the Flat Bottom girls to discuss being one half of a quarantined couple, using dance as cardio, and of course her incredible skincare routine. One look at Carmen's glowing face will tell you that you must listen to find out her secret! Rate, review, and subscribe if you liked this episode! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    Maddy got Uggs!!

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 25, 2020 60:44


    Maddy got Ugg boots to prep for winter and Jordan is working on her sleep schedule since lately she's been nocturnal but losing her mind. Luckily she bought retinol. Jordan also talks about the Covid symptoms she's had since March, like everything smelling like rotten beef. Fun! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    Winter Is Coming

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 17, 2020 57:59


    The flat bottom girls discuss the impending doom that is winter and how to stay busy for the next six months. Also, all couples during quarantine are losing their minds. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    Biden turns GA blue and NYC into Coachella

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 11, 2020 58:42


    Maddy and Jordan discuss the election mayhem, money shots and Maddy finds out to her horror... Jordan’s credit score.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    Post Election Whiplash

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 4, 2020 60:41


    Maddy and Jordan recover from Halloween and prepare for tactics for the post election whiplash.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    Jordan Got Dosed

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 29, 2020 60:01


    Maddy was supposed to do a fall getaway with her boyfriend but the AirBnb turned out to be a Nightmare-bnb! Meanwhile Jordan did drugs in the city per usual! The flat bottoms reign again! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    Sexipode: Maddy and Jordan Can Do It Themselves

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 19, 2020 58:20


    Maddy and Jordan discuss their failure at diet's. Jordan re-considers her perspective on threesomes  And both of them agree on a fatal mistake men make in the bedroom. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    Maddy Blacked the F*ck Out on Her Birthday!

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 14, 2020 59:24


    Maddy and Jordan recap Maddy’s birthday where she blacked out and sang sublime songs until 2 am and her boyfriend Andrew begged her to stop! The next day she hated herself. She does it every year! Ultimately maddy and Jordan and up discussing the annoying habit of guys who wear extravagant sneakers and terrible outfits. Red flag! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    Trump has COVID!!

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 5, 2020 61:39


    The flat bottom girls discuss Donald Trump getting Covid after the presidential debate this week that was, in a word, unsettling! But the girls weren’t all political! They also discussed having babies and the potential for Jordan to raise Maddy’s babies! Fun! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    We Hate Ourselves!!

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 28, 2020 62:46


    Jordan and Maddy talk self-loathe - where did it originate and why? From childhood weight issues to parental abandonment, the Flat Bottom Girls get into the root of their self-hating issues, and how it influences their lives and lifestyles today.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    Comedy Philosophy Part 2

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 22, 2020 50:30


    Jordan and Maddy are once again picking apart the careers and lives they’ve chosen for themselves! They’re doing outdoor shows and panicking about the future of comedy. Enjoy! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    We Need Co-dependents Anonymous 

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 15, 2020 60:43


    Jordan naturally resists the notion of therapy but Maddy is really into it because her therapist has calmed her during the pandemic. Maddy talks about some of the shitty therapists she's dealt with and then the gals go off on a tangent about social media and how it's destroying their mental health more than a therapist could ever try to fix! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    Male doctors suck!

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 7, 2020 47:01


    Jordan finally got the meds she needed for her hypo thyroid condition and her PMDD and she’s walking on air. Maddy reminisces on blacking out in upstate NY. They both agree that the thought of having sex with a stranger sounds awful. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    Philosophizing Stand Up

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 1, 2020 70:18


    Jordan and Maddy have a lengthy discussion about their feelings on comedy, their careers, and some goals for moving forward as artists in an industry that is currently barely alive. They get into the nitty gritty of the stand up grind and the necessity of the “plan B” in a field where most of us are delusional. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    Wedding Dresses for Red Heads

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 25, 2020 70:19


    Jordan and Maddy shoot da shit and talk about how unwell they’ve been this month and some of the routines they’ve been sticking to during this time. Jordan took a 3 hour bath to help her PMS and Maddy eats a lot of bread and calls it self care. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    Positive Pod

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 17, 2020 41:16


    For the love of god a positive pod! Maddy and Jordan attempt to devise a plan on how to stay sane come fall and winter. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    What I Like About You

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 10, 2020 65:32


    Jordan and Maddy discuss breakups and what they value in relationships. Jordan is going through a break up but understands why the relationship wouldn't work anyway. They also talk about sex vs. intellectual compatability in relationships and which is better.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    Jordan fixed her OCD with LSD

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 3, 2020 73:35


    Maddy and Jordan continue to discuss phases of their life. Jordan talks about her experience with OCD as a kid and how an acid trip kinda fixed it. Maddy has an internal debate about doing shrooms which she may do this summer. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    Phase 2

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 27, 2020 57:37


    Jordan and Maddy continue to discuss the phases of their life, going in depth to Maddy's depression tinder sex days and Jordan's tattoos. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    Phased Out

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 21, 2020 44:25


    Jordan and Maddy tackle this week's topic: phases they've been through. From emo music and punk style to Urban Outfitters cardigans, they've done it all! Next week's episode will expand on this topic. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    First Love

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 26, 2020 60:30


    The girls get together on Zoom to discuss this week's topic: first love. They also have a heated discussion about men's fashion. Enjoy! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    NYC Primaries: How to Vote

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 15, 2020 56:08


    Jordan and Maddy talk about quarantine, protests, and then sit down with Noa Wesley to discuss the upcoming NY primary election and how to vote.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    Make Yourself at Home

    Play Episode Listen Later May 28, 2020 69:17


    Description: Maddy and Jordan catch up and discuss Nebraska, Maryland, and everything in between. This week's topic: things that are hard about staying in other people's homes. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    Do You Forgive Me?

    Play Episode Listen Later May 21, 2020 74:24


    The girls catch up virtually from their personal NYC hell holes and discuss the pros and cons of quarantine. They come to the conclusion that there are no pros! Nah jk. Then they cover this week's topic: a time when you forgave someone.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    It's British

    Play Episode Listen Later May 11, 2020 67:04


    Maddy and Jordan have a tipsy Michael Rowland back on the pod. This one is really off the rails and you will love it. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    Eavesdropping

    Play Episode Listen Later May 1, 2020 56:04


    Maddy and Jordan pod from their Brooklyn hovels to speculate on the aftermath of Covid, their coping mechanisms for Quarantine. They also spend a chunk of time eaves dropping on Jordan's neighbor having sex. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    Episode 6 From the Quarantine Bunker

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 25, 2020 67:02


    Jordan and maddy record from home and talk about their quarantine. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    Episode 5 - Mike Rowland vs Peter from the Bachelor 

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 16, 2020 67:16


      Maddy Smith (Wild'n Out) and Jordan (JFL) sit down with Mike Rowland and discuss  PMS, doggy style and a complete critical analysis of the most recent season of the Bachelor.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    bachelor mike rowland
    Episode 4 - Caitlin Peluffo blacks out with the girls

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 9, 2020 60:20


    Caitlin Peluffo, hot off the Late Show with Stephen Colbert, joins the Flat Bottom Girls to discuss this week's topic: what to do after blacking out. the gals discuss their college drinking habits and more. Thanks for listening! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    Episode 3 - Maddy and Jordan, 2 Girls No Guest

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 1, 2020 38:11


    Maddy and Jordan fly solo and  get into it about Wild N Out, the horrors of out of town friends, student debt, having kids, and how to steal from Wegmans. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    Episode 2 - Andrew Schiavone’s Guide to Tinder

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 25, 2020 65:28


    The Flat Bottom Girls sit down with Andrew Schiavone (Panic Attacking podcast, Sirius XM, Maddy’s boyfriend) and discuss this week’s topic: fast food. Also, Jordan and Maddy debate the pros and cons of bowling. Got a topic you’d like to hear on the pod? Email flatbottomgirlspodcast@gmail.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    Episode 1 - First Episode?? Hell yea!

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 20, 2020 71:02


    Guest Isabel Hagen just appeared on the Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon, and now she's sitting down with the Flat Bottom Girls to tackle this week's topic: how to feed yourself in NYC. Submitted by Maddy's sister, @friendilysmith. Shoutout to Emily! Want to submit a topic? Email flatbottomgirlspodcast@gmail.com. See you next week! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    Flatbottom Girls Coming Soon

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 24, 2020 0:28


    Hosts Jordan Jensen (JFL) and Maddy Smith (Wild'n Out) cover topics sent in by you!  Welcome to Flatbottom Girls! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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