Milk Trails: A Journey In The Out-Of-Hospital Birth Experience

As I prepare to welcome my second child into this world, this episode feels especially appropriate and a good one to temporarily sign off with. Renee Morrison, a mother to two beautiful children earth side, entrepreneur, and creator shares her birthing stories – one at a birth center and one at home. Get ready for a rich and inspiring 2-hour journey as we speak about birthing life, loss, grief, and gratitude and how all of it has informed the personal work Renee does within herself and thus the way she mothers and nurtures her children and family.

Samara is a 42-year-old mother of 4, yoga instructor and Zumba teacher. She gave birth to all of her children at home with her youngest just 9 months ago. In addition to co-managed care with an OB-GYN and her midwife, Samara's trust in her body's strength, wisdom and capabilities trumped all concerns she heard around pregnancy over 35. However, like every birthing story, there's a turn in ‘ the labyrinth' one doesn't expect and even for a seasoned mama, Samara ultimately had to do what every birthing person has to do — surrender to the journey.

Jenna discusses the parallel experiences of pregnancy and a pandemic - and the feelings of living through both at the same time. She shares her journey of choosing her birthing team and eventually a birth center setting, her physiologic and fast birthing story and lastly the surprise of suffering from anxiety turned insomnia in the weeks and months after giving birth.

When second time labor and births are more challenging than the first, it can be jarring and confusing, especially when the first experience was so fast towards the end of labor, that your baby was known as “Hallway Harrison” at the birth center where he was born. Elizabeth and Doug share the story of their home birth for their second son and the great surprise of having to work so much harder – emotionally and physically – for the birthing experience they had before. In the early days postpartum, Elizabeth came to find out why her labor was so challenging, the long-haul road to recovery and moving through it all at the start of a global pandemic.

Ally is a mother of two and shares her experience of having an HBAC – Home Birth After Cesarean. In the US, more and more birthing folks with a prior cesarean are seeking out home birth in response to a denial of hospital-based care for a VBAC (aka vaginal birth after cesarean), to avoid having an unnecessary cesarean and lastly to avoid repeating a previously traumatic experience in the hospital. In Ally’s case it was for all of these reasons. She discusses her first birthing experience, the postpartum grief and healing that took place and the courage to do it again in a way that felt true to her motherly and bodily instincts.

It’s the middle of March and Cianna is 35 weeks pregnant with a plan to give birth in the hospital. Meanwhile, the Coronavirus pandemic has spread to the US, and the mandated lock down has begun. As a Black presenting Mexican woman, she is aware of her risks of birthing in a hospital simply because of the way she looks. Now compounded by the risk of COVID-19, Cianna and her husband felt it was safer for her to birth at home – something in fact they both had always desired. It was only the beginning of surrendering to the journey and its many twists and turns ahead.

For Megan’s first child, she planned to give birth in a birth center with her husband, doula and team of midwives. However, as is the nature of parenthood, the best laid plans can often go awry. In early labor, Megan transferred to the hospital where she had an unmedicated vaginal delivery. Her early postpartum phase was difficult – riddled with anxiety, sleep deprivation and feelings of grief, as she mourned the loss of her pre-baby self. Much of this she felt had to do with a lack of preparation and support for this time with a newborn. A little over a year later and expecting her second child, Megan was determined to prepare as best she possibly could for the birthing experience she had always wanted.

Elizabeth is 8 weeks postpartum and already wears many hats – a new mother to Francesca, loving partner to Priscilla and back to work as a somatic sex therapist to her now virtual patients. We talk about her experiences of choosing reciprocal IVF, having a home birth, helping clients regain sexuality in the postpartum phase and what social distancing has been like with her newborn baby.

Ruby was one of the “lucky” ones. It took no effort to get pregnant, she felt great in her pregnancy and the birth was relatively easy. But the immediate postpartum and weeks thereafter was really when she went into “labor”, facing the challenges that helped her transform into a mother.

Britta Bushnell is a renowned childbirth educator and doula as well as a wife, mother of two, and now author of her first book – Transformed By Birth. She has a PhD in mythology which she has brilliantly woven into her birth preparation series – Embodica. Her class is unique in that it’s less about the mechanics of birth and more about the greater transformation that takes place when becoming parents – no matter where or how you give birth. Together, we talk about birth as a rite of passage and how to keep going on the journey when your intentions, capabilities, and ideologies are tested.

In this special episode, we have Jeanne-Marie Paynel, a mother of two as well as a parenting guide and mentor. Jeanne-Marie has a Masters in Montessori education and over 15 years of experience guiding and mentoring parents and children. She is the founder of Voila Montessori – a parenting school and mentoring community based in San Diego, California. Jeanne-Marie and I talk about about her passions of the Montessori philosophy as well as ways to improve your relationship with your child (through what’s known as) Conscious Parenting and Positive Discipline. Also, (what was most intriguing to me) as a home consultant, Jeanne-Marie guides families on how best to prepare their home from birth onward to promote a peaceful environment for both parent and child. She is a beautiful inspiration and reminder of the true importance of our role as caregivers – not as servants of children but supporters of their natural curiosity, wonder and development.

For the birth of her second child, midwife and mother, Erin, planned a home birth with a midwife. For weeks leading up to the due date, her baby kept turning from head down to butt down until, at 39 weeks, she had to schedule a cesarean due to her baby’s unstable position. Here she was faced with the frustrating prospect of having to give up her home birth. Also, being a midwife herself, she felt conflicted in deciding between what she knew and how she counseled her own patients and what she wanted and felt as a woman and mother. The day before Erin’s c-section, her baby miraculously turned head down once again! In this episode, Erin tells about the race against the clock to get labor going naturally in order to have the home birth she wanted.

Miscarriage is such a complicated and often silent topic. Unexpectedly losing an expected child can come with so many feelings of confusion, guilt, grief as well as anxiety, doubt, and depression. While miscarriage is unfortunately not that uncommon (10-20% of women who know they are pregnant will lose a baby early in pregnancy), it can feel like such an isolating experience. In this episode, Amanda Squitieri is proud to share the stories of the children she has birthed who are here on the outside as well as the ones she has loved and lost on the inside. She offers her insight, advice and reassurance of how to hold space for pregnancy loss and find the courage to conceive again.

Erica Mock knew she wanted a home birth as soon as she found out she was pregnant. Her past experience using alternative modalities helped her trust her body to have the birth she wanted. However, there was more work to be done to prepare her mind for the unexpected and unknown. So, of course, Erica’s labor started with her water breaking, something she had not anticipated as it is actually quite uncommon contrary to popular belief! On a side note, Erica started an incredibly delicious organic prepared meal service specifically designed for prenatal and postpartum mothers. Check out 25/8 - nurturing mothers 24/7 so they can be mothers 25/8.

Eileen came from a long line of women in her family who had highly medicalized births, including her own, each one with less intervention than the last. After a cesarean with her first child and a vaginal birth after cesarean (also known as a VBAC) in the hospital for her second, Eileen chose to have a home birth with a midwife for her third. Eileen felt it was important for her two older daughters to be part of the experience in an attempt to rewrite their family birth history. With a tub, her husband, mother, and two daughters present, Eileen gave birth to her third daughter on what she calls the greatest day of her life.

In this episode, your host and midwife Hayley Oakes is five weeks postpartum after having her first child. This time she gets to answer the questions! Birth doula Carson Meyer interviews Hayley about her pregnancy, home birth and postpartum experiences. Hayley discusses the benefits of proper preparation as well as the potential downside of being a medical professional and knowing almost too much about the process. Tune in to hear more about Hayley’s personal transition from midwife to mother.

Alannah, an ER nurse in her native Australia, wanted to have a home birth for her second child here in the States, but she was met with cultural confusion, financial difficulties and medical resistance. Although her first child was induced and born at 34 weeks due to growth restriction, she knew as a health care provider and intuitive mother that this previous experience did not risk her out of a home birth for her second child. She managed to find an OB and a midwife who co-managed her pregnancy and the health of her growing baby. Redemption was sweet (albeit hard work) when she spontaneously went into labor at nearly 40 weeks, supported by her midwife and surrounded by her loved ones.

Alexis is a mother of three and a psychotherapist specializing in the prenatal and postpartum transition into parenthood. In this episode, she shares her transformative experience of becoming a parent for the first time. We explore the common yet unexpectedly difficult feelings around caring for a child and the resulting growth from surrendering to what is needed. Also, Alexis always knew she wanted a home birth but was met with strong resistance from her parents and her partner, especially for her first child. But after two positive hospital births with midwives, Alexis finally had the home birth she always wanted.

Morgan Campbell, a postpartum doula, grew up hearing the tales of her and her siblings’ out of hospital birth stories. For her own birthing experience, she believed home was where she would feel safest to be her most primal and vulnerable self. And primal she got. She made loud and visceral vocalizations during every contraction. Her sounds even attracted a neighborhood skunk who walked in the house as Morgan was close to pushing out her baby.

Prior to having her own children, Amber traveled to a midwifery clinic in Mexico to train and attend births as a doula. Her work there helped shape the choices she would make for her own births later down the road. With her first child she planned a hospital birth with midwives, and after a very quick labor she barely made it to the hospital in time. For her second, she thought, “Why not a home birth”?

Prior to motherhood, Madison was intrigued with everything birth related including her own birth story of being breech and born by cesarean. From her work as a postpartum doula, she had been exposed to many birth stories including home birth. She was also fascinated by what’s known as ‘free birthing’ which is giving birth without the presence of medical professionals. But in the early weeks of her pregnancy, Madison decided to establish care with a midwife. At 38 weeks, after a 24-hour labor, and a discussion of transferring to the hospital due to her exhaustion, Madison finally gave birth to her son in the comfort of their own home.

39-year-old first-time mother Rhea planned a birth center birth because she was not comfortable with the idea of laboring at home in her apartment with neighbors in close proximity. As a performer and back up singer for Pharrell Williams, she assumed it would be her natural instinct to be vocal in coping with the contractions. Ironically, she was completely silent during labor, surprising herself and her midwife. We start our conversation with how she first became introduced to the choices around childbirth.

PART I: Rosie and Noah shared the birth story of their son at home. Their first child was born in a birth center and after a successful, natural birth, they had to transfer to the hospital for a retained placenta. The second time around, Rosie and Noah felt like they were ready to give birth in the comfort of their own home. Together they shared their experience coming to the decision to plan a home birth, the fears they worked through and of course how it all unfolded the night of.

PART II: Rosie and Noah shared the birth story of their son at home. Their first child was born in a birth center and after a successful, natural birth, they had to transfer to the hospital for a retained placenta. The second time around, Rosie and Noah felt like they were ready to give birth in the comfort of their own home. Together they shared their experience coming to the decision to plan a home birth, the fears they worked through and of course how it all unfolded the night of.

We talk about how they chose their midwife, their baby turning head down in the last weeks of pregnancy and just barely avoiding a transfer of care to a doctor as Djuna went nearly 2 weeks past her due date. And after all of that, they got to experience a smooth and successful home birth.

At 40 weeks pregnant, first-time parents Rory and Gabriel, planning a home birth, were evacuated from their apartment due to Hurricane Irma. They found shelter at a local hospital while their midwife was forced to leave town. Almost a week later, barely settled back into their home and with their midwife still a few hours away, Rory went into labor.