Undercooked Analysis

David and Seid (from CreativeHorror.com and The Witching Hour podcast) want to give a quick outline of some recent developments and for the future of this and other podcasts. More detail will come soon.

It's been a long time coming, but Kaela assumes control again as she and Nick Barbera return to the mythos started in David's "Grad Night in the Haunted Mansion" and continued in "The Man with the Cane." What seems to be an innocuous archive of a Disney forum discussion may hide a deeper story, but is it worth digging through, or has David worn the idea into the ground? Do not pull down on the safety bar, please: we will lower it for you."DoorlessChambers.com Forums" was written by David King. Read along here.

It's the return of NoSleep Nonsense as Allen brings on Mike MacDee and Nick Nocturne for a rousing read of a faulty Alexa and a person with a talent that really sucks. How do these stories fair?"My Amazon Alexa does more than just laugh" and "Why do all my lollipops moan when I put them in my mouth?" are both credited to iia.

You're about to get more than you bargained for as Dead Palette, Chelsea and Travis become the Sunshine Biscuit Division. They rise and shine the light of day on a lost scene of "Saved By The Bell" and a haunted copy of Shin Megami Tensei: Persona 3

David has an in-person read with Ben Paddon for a story about the infamous Slenderman, police incompetence and apparent narcolepsy. Will this be a narrative reaffirming Slenderman's context as mysterious figure, or will it trip over its own tentacles?Credited to HarbleMornets. Read along here.Check out the Indiegogo campaign for Ben's "Typecast" webseries here.

Allen and Mike MacDee have a pitch for a new kind of show, wherein they craft a story based on audience-selected criteria: this time, it's a haunted cartridge story about a certain cyborg bee and must involve a dead family member, friend or lover.

Dead Palette and two of his friends talk about guns and slang terms for awhile and then read a couple stories about guns or something I guess. Whatever."We Make Guns" is credited to FRAAANK!!! Read along here; "The Old House in Gettysburg" is credited to Saintmichael1226. Read along here.

In this creepy-crawly episode, David reunites with returning guest Matt Holley to answer a very weird Craigslist ad. Will this narrative angle convince our hosts to commit, or will they be turned away by a shoddy product?"Serious Inquiries Only, Please!" was written by Urkelbot666. Read along here.Music credit: "Lost in the Lair of the Sea God" by Abysmii.

Meet the new hosts of UCA - Abysmii, Rose Shrimp, Beth and Morzathoth - as they hop from Rawdog Readings to begin their new career. Will their first story prove to be a welcome read or an abysmal slog?"Out in the Woods" is attributed to prozac101. Read along here.

An episode from our archives, considered for a new segment of the show but never followed through on... until now. David, Dead Palette and Allen are given several short stories by ClericofMadness from Creepypasta Wiki's Content Abuse Log: stories that are automatically blocked due to cliches, overused tropes and just plain clumsiness.

The band breaks up.

While Sam and Kyle continue their search for Kimber, your hosts realize they might have hit the absolute bottom of the barrel in terms of jokes, and Allen begins to see the pieces coming together."Borrasca" is credited to C.K. Walker, aka The_Dalek_Emperor. Read along here.

Three typical, average hosts inside a haunted podcast. Just by chance, meet Gram-Gram to make them Borrasca. Um, all joking aside, things keep getting worse for the protagonists, and we're all along for the ride."Borrasca" is credited to C.K. Walker, aka The_Dalek_Emperor. Read along here.

The plot thickens as our protagonists begin seriously trying to learn the truth behind Borrasca, and the effect it has on the town. Meanwhile, David, Dead Palette and Allen continue to be dummies, and Gram-Gram doesn't know when to quit."Borrasca" is credited to C.K. Walker, aka The_Dalek_Emperor. Read along here.

While David and Kaela relocate due to water damage in their apartment, the Hyper-Realists step in to deal with some water damage of their own..."Standing Water" is credited to Cosmo Fish. Read along here.

As they return to the chilling, sinister world of Borrasca after a fair absence, the guys approach with the usual care and gravitas you've come to expect from this podcast... Oh. And Gram-Gram does some more ludicrous stunts."Borrasca" is credited to C.K. Walker, aka The_Dalek_Emperor. Read along here.

David and Dead Palette meet with half the cast of Rawdog Readings - Zath, HyperThermal and Beth - to imbibe another Patron's Poison of a eerie encounter on a dark mountain trail. Is the whole thing to be taken at face value, or does a joke observation by Dead Palette turn out to be the clumsy hidden subtext of the tale?"Prey" is credited to John R. Read along here.

David and Kaela kind of feel like it's the first episode all over again, except it's definitely not since they're not reading "Laughing Jack" but a story about wallpaper and obsession. No, not the Charlotte Perkins Gilman short story that's also about wallpaper and obsession. Just... Just give it a listen."A Tear in the Wallpaper" is credited to Umbrello. Rad along here.

Allen is sick, putting Borrasca on hold for a little bit, so join David, Dead Palette, Kaela and Mike MacDee for a paw-fully good time diving into yet another weird little pocket of the internet. What will they find on a Creepypasta Wiki meant only for stories related to a kids show they've never seen?"The Road To The End" is credited to SilverCestor789."Evil Patrol" is credited to Chase787.

The boys (and Gram-Gram) head back to the Ozarks to continue the winding tale. What even is "Borrasca," and why does the sound from the mountain herald catastrophe?"Borrasca" is credited to C.K. Walker, aka The_Dalek_Emperor. Read along here.

After what feels like ages of hoping, David finally gets his wish as he, Dead Palette and Allen get started reading the novella-length C.K. Walker story, set in a small Ozarks town and through the eyes of a child, at least to start with. Will it prove to be all it's cracked up to be? And why did Dead Palette decide it was a good idea to invite Gram-Gram Palette along?"Borrasca" is credited to C.K. Walker, aka The_Dalek_Emperor. Read along here.

It's true when they say too much TV will kill you. Allen, Dead Palette, Eli and Kylie read a a story of a "hyper-realistic" surprise gone bad, with the occasional chime in of special guest Raptor Noises."HD Death" is credited to Umbrello.

Allen is David, Dead Palette is Abysmii, Eli and Kylie from Cinema Nippon/Animal Fact Files are themselves, and there might be a cameo by Prasakour as raptor noises in yet another ponderous edition of Short and Shivery."The Special Ingredient" is credited to sgy0003."Purgatory" is credited to Fluteheart.

David, Dead Palette and Allen would walk at least that far to get you another batch of RitualPasta. This time they take a little road trip down a spooky stretch of highway looking for their ultimate desire. Will they get their wish, or will the story leave them wishing they hadn't read it at all?"11 Miles" is credited to Emerry.

Nothing is secure, contained or protected from us at the Foundation, and David and Kaela have once again escaped with their lives and a handful of SCPs to discuss. They're joined live by Abysmii and Papreeka of Raygun Readers, as well as new faces Lex Reckless and Ben Waxler to determine the validity of these archives.All of the entries read can be found on the SCP Foundation website: http://www.scp-wiki.net/SCP-1867 - "A Gentleman" was archived by Djoric.SCP-503-ARC - "The Infinite Pasta Pot" was archived by thedeadlymoose.SCP-1247 - "LaBeouf Viewer" was archived by ksaid.

Another one already? And it's another haunted gaming collection? What are these guys even thinking? It seems January 2018 is the month of the Cursed Cartridge, and this time the gang focuses on the Nintendo 64."1080 Snowboarding N64: The Dark Boarder" is credited to Incorrect3. Read along here."Glover Creepypasta" is credited to Nintendude. Read along here.

Dead Palette and Chelsea are back, and so is Short and Shivery in a short timespan. Ity's time for more haunted gaming, in this case Resident Evil 4 and Devil May Cry. Do we even need to ask at this point if these stories will be any good? Because we all know in our hearts how it's probably gonna go down..."Resident Evil 4: One Chance Only" has no original credit; "Devil May Cry: Dante's Revenge" is credited to Dragonrights72.

With class and sophistication your terrific trio kick of 2018 with all the professionalism you expect from Undercooked Analysis. Their story this time around features a frustrated writer that eats brown sugar and is paid a visit in his lonely cabin by something hideous. Will this story crawl into our hearts, or is it best to lock the doors and leave it outside?"One Windy Night" is credited to Isaac Boissonneau (Hopefullygoodgramar). Read along here.

Dead Palette is flying solo in this episode, joined only by his mysterious Tulpa, C.F. Comer, as they spelunk into a pair of pastas based on Tomb Raider. What a great way to start 2018, eh?"Tomb Raider Creepypasta" is credited to Percydercymercy2; "Tomb Raider 3: Game Over!" is credited to SmashBrawlFanfiction.

Surprise! It's Christmas, and David, Dead Palette and Allen are the gift that keeps on giving. This episode is pretty much nothing but holiday discussion, with a NoSleep story tied on like a bow at the very end. We hope you enjoy, and we wish you happy holidays, no matter what you celebrate (or don't, as the case may be)."'I hear Santa's reindeer outside!' shouted my six-year-old" is credited to BlairDaniels.

The gang has decided to give you your present early this year, with a couple of horrible holiday stories that are sure to bring you tidings of comfort and joy (in one way or another). Meanwhile, enjoy the usual stocking stuffer of a lot of banter."Christmas" is credited to CafeLegendary; "Christmas in July" is credited to EmyrealInvective.

Another intrepid Patron has sent us their own story to be analyzed, this one inspired by the concept of Keyhole Fiction - a snapshot of a world without much in the way of explanation. Will the gang find the view enticing, or are they left with a door best left unlocked?"Viewed Through A Keyhole" is written by Alex Hatzberger.

It's back to basics as David and Kaela go out on their own to read a NoSleep story that became an Easter Egg in the free-to-play visual novel "Doki-Doki Literature Club." And that's just the background, where the story itself follows a college student with murder on her mind. Will it's overlong NoSleep title drive our pair away before it begins, or will perseverance prove to find a hidden gem? "I found a small box hidden in a mall that contains the recollection of a 19-year-old girl who decided to kill someone just to see what it's like" (hoo boy) is credited to Dan Salvato.