DOC PARK's Brutal Optimist Podcast

Sometimes we find hope in the strangest of places... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tqukEaOWZqE

How should we handle chaos and uncertainty? What would C.S. Lewis say about it? Why do I call it the Brutal Optimist Podcast? Answers to all these questions and more!

Many of my patients complain about having no drive to do anything. Some of them are depressed and some just need motivation to make their lives better. Let's discuss. Website mentioned: https://qcurtius.com/2016/02/13/the-foundations-of-motivation/ My Website: http://www.doctorchrispark.com p.s. This is not medical advice.  Talk to your doctor.

A little primer on Lent for beginners... and what my plans are for the next 40 days. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YTW-6MQGq7w&t=201s

This is a story that you won't hear in your Sunday school class. Unless of course you're in my class ;) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QPojNlv9M6s p.s. Who's your favorite Saint?

Ever felt aimless? Like you were just spinning your wheels? Everyone feels that way some times. Let's talk about it. https://youtu.be/dij9Mro3OQg

My friend, Jason Jaggers, joins me for a soft debate on Christianity vs Atheism and why Jiu Jitsu is an investment worth making. Thanks for listening!   p.s. You can follow Jiu-Jitsu Monk on twitter: @jaggersjason  

Alright guys and gals, I hope y'all are having a great week. This episode is a little self explanatory. I threw the list together on the fly. So, if there's something you think should be added.... leave a comment. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TiXDRQdoYqE&t=18s p.s. Feel free to subscribe and share!

Five smooth stones. But all he needed was one. After the Giant was dead, David took the sword and took his head. Not all stories end this way.  Not every battle will seem as easy.  Not every Giant will fall as hard. So, how do you kill a giant? Listen and find out. P.S. This podcast directly stolen from this book.  If you know the author, please tell him not to be mad (and if you have the book, please throw it in the garbage and tag me.  Thanks)

The key to breaking addiction is building a life you don't want to escape from.  It won't be easy, but what else are you going to do? So here's the final thought... All the rest is nonsense if you miss this one thing.... You have a purpose and God has a plan. So if you only get one thing from any of this, it's this.... Reject Apathy.  Fight Nihilism.  Love your neighbor. God bless and God speed.   P.S. I accidentally deleted the original, so here's the re-post and a video https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CSMOBz1Gqos&t=1s

What do you believe? Can technology replace God or does technology require God? I am always fascinated with people's justifications for the things they do.  I've studied sociology, psychology, religions, and cults. Atheists claim we don't need God.  We can discover what needs to be discovered.  We can explain what needs to be explained.  If not now, then some day. Our advanced technology is our proof. But what is often lost is the questions left unsaid, the assumptions laid down, the bottom line left translucent. Here's what I mean: If we assume technology as advancement, then we presuppose advancement as the ideal.  If we say it is good (because things like treating asthma and fighting cancer are good) then we assume a moral standard. Our argument becomes not one of science and technology but one of transcendent rights and wrongs. If we say morality is subjective, then the one that seeks to destroy all civilization is no more morally wrong than the one that wants to serve it. We become utilitarians, trying to make decisions on what is the best good for the most people.  Or at the least, what's the least amount of harm.  But this presupposes that something that is good for people is something that actually matters. These types of mind games beg for a constant. A standard. An objective marker to determine what is and what should be. What do you think that objective is? Or maybe I should say, Who do you think that is? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T4fgtbWajsA p.s. Just a little something to think about. Make sure you listen to the podcast or watch the video and if you like this kind of stuff, give me a rating on iTunes or a shout out on social media. Much love and thanks. p.p.s. If you're looking for more spiritual type stuff (written by a guy that has no business writing that kind of stuff), then might I suggest you have a sip of this

Ideas are dangerous. And this is a story about a man that died for his. How far are you willing to take your ideas?

Do you hear voices in your head? Do they tell you things like.... you're not good enough, strong enough, smart enough? Time to tell yourself a new story.

Based on a recent talk I gave. Thanks for listening.

Not every idea is a good one. But how can you tell? Here's what I do...    

In this podcast we discuss how to be better at doing stuff. Yeah I know that sounds generic and unhelpful. Enjoy!

Ideas are dangerous. Our lives are the paths we walk as we try to decide which ideas are worth following. Christmas isn't a holiday. It's an idea. Listen to podcast and find out why or..... you can watch the video https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ld8CoxxE8bQ

"I can't go on like this any longer.  I'll be dead in two months if I don't do something now!" She was at the end of her rope.  Her struggle with addiction, the loss of relationships, and the destruction of her soul was too much to handle any more. She made it to my office.  So that's a start. She wasn't looking for a miracle.  Just a little hope.  That light in the darkness. She just needed someone to tell her that she could make it through this. She needed to believe that she could be a mom again.  That the disappointments and hurts could fade.  That the lies told could be forgotten. Now some of you may not know this but I am a family doctor.  I treat normal things like diabetes, depression, and back pain.  But I also have a special interest in treating alcohol and drug addiction.  Hopefully your story won't be as extreme as the one above.  But there is something we can all learn from people that have had to completely turn their life around for the better. The idea that you can't change is a lie.  And the hardest lies to overcome are the ones we tell ourselves. And so when life isn't turning out like you hoped it would,  when your story has no chance for a happy ending...... Tell another story. Here's how. How to Break Bad Habits and Start Building Better Ones 1) Start small We tend to overthink things.  Keep it simple. Concentrate on today's problems.  And make small adjustments. Little victories add up. Every day get a little stronger, a little faster, eat a little better.  These small daily changes will pay back exponentially with time. 2) The Long View Know what your big plan is and realize goals can be flexible. Have a vision for you life.  Then concentrate on the actions you need to take today to make that vision happen. 3) Get out of your comfort zone Practice changing daily routines.  This will help you break out of a rut. Get up 30 minutes earlier and go for a walk, or meditate, or journal.  Take a cold shower.  Talk to a stranger. You might say: But I'm not a morning person, or I can't sit still for 30 minutes and meditate, or I'm an introvert. Says who? Those are just stories you've told yourself.  Tell yourself a different story. To be someone different.  You need to do something different. Life is painful.  You know that. Do things that are uncomfortable.  Things that are difficult. You'll start to see that you have more control over your life  than you thought you did. 4) Stay focused (don't get upset when things don't work out) There's going to be trial and error. So what. You're going to fail. So what. People might think you're weird. So what. Do you know what inspires people?  It's not Instagram models or drugged up bodybuilders.  It's seeing normal people trying new things, being consistent and passionate. 5) Find a friend or if you can't find one, buy one Everyone needs someone they can go to when they're struggling.  Someone that won't judge them.  A person that will keep you accountable. If you're struggling with drug or alcohol addiction, then you need a sponsor.  This means someone that's been there before, knows what you're going through, and found a way out themselves.  There's no use re-inventing the wheel.  Learn from their mistakes and grow. Maybe you need a coach or a trainer.  Maybe you need a dietician to plan a few meals for you.  Or maybe you can just talk to your friend and get them to come on this journey with you. If you can find someone that's been where you are and has already gone through the process, then you can learn from their mistakes.  And they'll be happy to help you. 6) Build healthy relationships Start investing time in the people you love and the people that love you. No one is perfect.  Maybe you've been burned before.  I get it.  But it's time to start building something new. This might mean getting out of your comfort zone.

She was at the gas station. A simple task.  Get gas.  Go Home. She didn't expect to be attacked and threatened.  She asked for help, but none came. Now, days later, she can still hear the voice of her child screaming.  They feared for their lives.  Luckily they escaped. The memory of the event puts her into a panic.  Her palms sweat.  Her heart races.  She speaks through dripping tears. It took some time but we finally got to the heart of it.  The real reason why she was so upset, because no one came to help. "I just never realized, until that day, that everyone is evil and selfish." A cognitive distortion is a thought pattern that we have convinced ourselves to be true but that isn't true.  It becomes so ingrained in our thinking, that our actions re-inforce the idea. There are many cognitive distortions.  But today I only want to talk about these two: All or Nothing Thinking and Generalization. All or nothing thinking is just like it sounds....you only think in the extremes.  You see no middle ground.  You see past experiences and predict future events as black or white.  And often, you judge other people by this same standard. With overgeneralization, we predict all outcomes based on a previous event.  This limits our expectations and often stops us from future action. I don't watch the news anymore.  If I want to know what's going on in the world, I'll just ask someone. A few years ago, I would watch the news all the time.  It was entertainment.  I'd get mad at the world.  I'd think everyone was stupid.  I'd disagree with people just to disagree.  I thought everyone on TV was lying (I still think that, ha.  I just don't think they're evil anymore).  I found myself bitter. I started to see how other people were bitter as well.  Jaded.  Everyone yelling at everyone else but no one listening.  People were talking about abortion but no one was adopting babies.  People were talking about the dangers of drugs but not really knowing anything about treatment or the massive incarceration rates. Everyone had a side.  A point to make.  And yes, they were good points. But the problem is, things aren't black or white.  Things are gray. It's a struggle to make sure that truth is our belief and not that our beliefs become our truth. All or nothing thinking leads us to hold onto any thoughts or beliefs at the price of all other thoughts/beliefs.  One bad decision or outcome, and we think that we are always dumb or things never work out.  We let these beliefs penetrate our brains and run havoc. So what do we do? How To Fix Cognitive Distortions A simple trick to fix these cognitive distortions is to ask yourself questions.  And then answer the questions as honestly as possible.  Strip down the answers and look for both sides of the story. Here are some examples: Statement: Everyone is evil. Question: Is that so? How can I know that to be certain?  Is there anyone I know that's not evil?  Of course I can name many people that behave poorly but do those people have any redeemable qualities?  Is there anyone I know that has ever acted kindly? Statement: Everyone on the other political side is dumb. Question: Can I name at least one person that has intelligence or wit?  It would seem both sides are littered with high intelligence.  Even people that study the same laws, come up with different ways of interpretation.  Is there a benefit to looking at things from a different view? Statement: I'll never get a good job. Question: How can I know that for certain?  Are there other people in the world that came from similar circumstances and improved themselves?  What qualities do I have that other people find valuable?  Are there things I can improve on? Asking obvious questions like these can help break the cycle of our own cognitive distortions. Just make sure you try and see all sides or at least as many as you can. This isn't always easy, I'll give you that.

Want to learn how to hypnotize and control other people? Want to make them do your bidding? Well..... You're not ready for that yet. Start with the basics. Learn to hypnotize yourself instead.

I was too short.  Too ugly.  Too average.  There would be no great achievements in my life. These are the lies...or uh....half truths that I told myself. I don't know how long I let self doubt control my life. But one day is one day too many. At some point I had to kill the impostor....and just be me. And once I did that, I was completely free. Our minds create our reality.  What we believe to be true is what will be true. What I mean is, the things you focus on will be the things that drive you.  The more you think negative thoughts, the more negativity you will notice.  It becomes a vicious cycle. A limiting belief is something you assume to be true.  And because of your assumption, you are limited in your ability to grow mentally, heal psychologically, or just push forward in your pursuit of happiness. Limiting beliefs can sneak up on you.   They creep into your mind and set up shop.   So it's good to take a look every now and then and identify any beliefs that are toxic to your self. These 5 limiting beliefs will destroy your happiness, create a world of bitterness, and make you miserable. Okay that was dramatic.  But still......it's true. 1) I can't do this Look, I'm not going to sugar coat this.  I'm not about to tell you that you CAN DO ANYTHING you put your mind to.  That's silly. But I will tell you that we use CAN'T way too often. I can't lose weight. I can't get out of debt. I can't eat healthy. I can't stop smoking. The can'ts add up.  They take over your subconscious.  And soon, you start to believe the lies. If you're using this limiting belief, replace can't with WON'T.  And see how that reads.  Once you realize that you're just being stubborn, replace can't with can. Say it over and over. Your brain will eventually believe it to be true.  And that's when the magic starts to happen.  That's when you'll feel a weight lifted off your shoulders.  That's when you'll start to see amazing changes. 2) Playing the blame game Blaming other people makes our lives easier. This is the world of politics. This is the world of tribal rivalries. This is the world of misunderstanding, fear, and anger. You are where you are.  Just accept it. It doesn't have to be anyone's fault. It may or may not be your fault.  But that's not what's important. So what's important? Not blame, but responsibility. People come to me for help with addiction.   Many of these people never had a chance.  Their parents were addicts or absent or worse. It can be easy to get stuck in this blame game.  Maybe they blame their childhood trauma, or maybe they blame their doctor that gave them pain pills for years, or maybe they blame God.   And sometimes they blame themselves so much that their world becomes a dark pit of self-loathing. The ones that find success are the ones that stop worrying about who's at fault and start worrying so much about how they got there and start figuring out how to get out. They take responsibility.  They accept ownership of their situation. Blaming others for a fire in your house doesn't stop the flames from burning.  Deal with the fire and free yourself from the blame game. Own your world. 3) Hating yourself No one really hates themselves, do they? It would seem that our biggest critic is our own self.  Our biggest enemy, our own mind. This idea puts a new spin on Jesus's teaching to "Love your enemy" and to "Love your neighbor as yourself". Self criticism is not the same thing as self reflection.  It's okay to consider your weaknesses and your strengths.  It's okay to explore areas in your life that need improvement.  But when your inner voice starts to emotionally abuse you, then it's time to stand up for yourself. Here's how it normally goes down... You make a mistake at home or work and you immediately start to call yourself names.  "I'm an idiot."  "I never do anything right.

Fight Nihilism. Reject Apathy. Love Your Neighbor. Here's my rant against nothingness. p.s. You can listen to the podcast or watch the video.  It doesn't matter ;) Peace https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jA6oNI87_8U&t=16s

I told someone recently that I was born with a prozac generator in my brain. Which is just another way to say that I'm kind of laid back.  Mellow. It comes naturally. But what would you expect from a Dudeist priest? There is definitely an art to it and although I haven't completely mastered it, I've got some ideas. Keep reading and I will tell you 5 ways to being less stressed. 1. Keep it simple Don't overcomplicate things. If your life is full of worry and stress, try to pick one small thing and release all your anxiety about it. It doesn't have to be spectacular.  Anything will do. Sounds easy right? You start with something small so that later, the bigger stuff won't seem so daunting. An example could be: wear the same thing to work every day.  And then there's one less thing to worry about. I have a basic uniform for work: blue jeans, boots, button down shirt.  My shirt is either black, gray, or navy.  I follow this 90% of the time. And since this is my uniform, all I have to do is figure out what's clean.  I grab it, put it on, and go. Easy. Once you have one thing small thing that you no longer worry about, pick one other small thing. Rinse and repeat. 2. Your story What's your story?  What's the story you tell yourself?  What's the story you want told? By thinking of your story, you will be more motivated to do something and less motivated to live in fear. Break your story down.  What's the dialogue like?  What's the conflict? What's the solution? Are you the hero? The villain? The love interest? Now go and live that story.  Create the character and live it. When you know you're following your purpose....What's there to worry about? 3. Reverse meditation Sit down in a place without distractions. Get comfortable. Close your eyes. Breathe. Don't try and meditate. Don't attempt to push all thoughts aside. Instead, let the thoughts come.  Let them circle through your head.  But remember to breathe. Breathe in and out through your nostrils. Feel the cool air come in and the warm air go out. As you do this, you'll notice a lightness to your thoughts.  A calmness surrounding your dread.  Picture a warm light enveloping your body.  This light protects you.  It prevents your thoughts from attacking you. With each breath, let anxiety come and go.  Breathe deeper if necessary and let the external world around you fade. Let this present moment exist without expectations.  (Which is a fancy way of saying...Let it be.) Practice this every day.  Work up to 10, 20, 30 minutes. You might say...."but Doc, I don't have time."   Well, just do less of something else and more of this. 4. Imagination Imagine what it would be like to be happy every day. To be able to get all the things done in a day that you felt were necessary and to still have time for yourself. What would it feel like to live a life less stressed?  What would your day be like? Now, take the time to imagine a situation that you handled poorly.  Maybe you freaked out more than you should have.  Maybe your temper got the best of you.  Whatever it was, take the time to visualize a different scenario.....one where you made the right choices. Accept forgiveness for your previous mistakes and now visualize yourself improving.  Every day a step closer to being the person you need to be. Visualization and affirmations work by hypnotizing your subconscious. Your lizard brain will try to make things a reality.  (I'm just kidding of course...you don't have a lizard brain.  But what you do have is a beautiful electro-chemical machine that can do almost anything.  Embrace your potential for healing.) 5. The Long View If you are anything like me....you will feel overwhelmed at times.  Sometimes all you can do is one small thing.  But that small thing will snowball into larger things.  It will pay dividends.  Don't be afraid of the small stuff. By taking the long view,

Do these 6 things if you want more out of life   http://www.doctorchrispark.com

Ever been to Haiti?  It's an interesting and beautiful place. Also....what's your favorite of the Ten Commandments? Listen to the podcast and you can hear my take on a few things. Thanks for listening. Peace.

Conquer yourself and the world lies at your feet" ---St. Augustine

On living a life that matters. And knowing just enough to know that you don't know anything. A 3 Part story... http://www.doctorchrispark.com  

Nihilism is the philosophy that there is no purpose to life and that life is meaningless. It leads to dark corners in a person's mind. There's this thing called the "High Place Phenomenon" or "Call of the Void". It's when you're standing on a ledge and you have this weird feeling that you should jump. Sometimes the call of the void is internal as well as external.  And it affects more people than you might think. In this podcast, I discuss my thoughts on Nihilism. You can agree or disagree. It doesn't matter. Because nothing matters. Just kidding. Things matter. And I'm going to tell you why Nihilism is wrong. p.s. If you want to read more of my thoughts on a better answer to Nihilism https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5gPrD3cTZuM  

This is a rough draft/outline of a talk I was preparing. I recorded it to check the time and make sure it was flowing. The actual talk turned out different, better I think.  But I didn't record it.  So I thought I'd put this up as a podcast for anyone wanting to listen. But don't judge it too harshly ;) This is the story of why I became an addiction doctor. Feel free to check out my book here: https://amzn.to/2SuEH9W my website: http://www.doctorchrispark.com

A podcast based on a previous post. And a picture of me when I still had a little hair left. Original blog post

Website: DOCTORCHRISPARK.COM Instagram: doc_chris_park Twitter: Chrispark97 Facebook This episode is based off my recent blog post: How to Know Everything is Going to be Okay.   Awake, O sleeper and arise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you." ---Ephesians 5:14  

Life is impermanent. Life is beautiful. Stop trying to be perfect. Stop trying to be happy. This was supposed to be a follow up to last weeks episode on negative visualization. But I had to delete that one.  It was horrible. Not sure if this is any better. Oh well, it could have been worse. Thanks for listening. p.s. If you need help with addiction, depression, or anxiety: DOCTORCHRISPARK.COM  

We all have a tendency to live inside our heads. It's the space we create inside and the actions we take that make the difference. In this episode, I share the stoic practice of negative visualization and how it might help you.  (And I talk a little about jiu jitsu) Life isn't always easy, but maybe there's a way to plan ahead. Don't let fear and anxiety run your life.      

There's a lot that can be learned from the stories of others. Thanks for listening.

What's holding you back? And what can you do about it? This is my follow up to the previous article. A better way to use iF Hope you enjoy. Music: Stop Being Quiet by Decreek

All truths are bloody truths" ---Nietzsche My retelling of the Nietzsche Metamorphosis from Thus Spake Zarathustra. Music: www.bensound.com

"Coyote is always out there waiting, and coyote is always hungry" ---Navajo saying   If you struggle with addiction, then you understand the concept of "hell" on earth. In this podcast, I'll discuss my thoughts on Hell. And how to get out.  

How do you define success? Whether you believe you can or you can't....YOU'RE RIGHT. In this podcast I discuss how one patient had to change her definition of success. If you want to know how to be successful with medication assisted therapy for opiate addiction, then this is a MUST LISTEN!