Finding Freedom with Bipolar

I honestly thought I'd never need a psychiatric hospitalization again. I thought I was past all that…so this came as an awful surprise and after my son's important event that I wanted to be so special and it deserved to be. I felt like I ruined it and my marriage was in jeopardy. This is what happened… Song dedications for this podcast episode: My Life by Imagine Dragons and Blood Upon the Snow by Hozier & Bear McCreary. Listen to however you get your music.

The small things matter when you're in a vulnerable state. Among other things, I share the small, gradual progress that compounded to steer me in a better direction that helped me get through my depression rut and spring funk. **Song recommendation: Fight Song by Rachel Platten. Listen on YouTube.com or however you get your music. I like the hour version the best.:)

After a very long break (over a year) I'm finally back! This marks a new starting line as I've reached the “enough is enough” threshold and will get out of this rut. **Song recommendation—Joy in the Morning by Tauren Wells (worship version). Look up on YouTube or however you get your music.

Do you have a hard time “showing up” in your life with what you want to do and end up self-sabotaging with a new endeavor? Do u keep recreating the same with focusing on your struggles? Are you stuck in your old identity but scared of who you could really become if you create the identity you want? These are some of the things I've been facing and need to address to help me continue with this podcast. I also have a better plan to share the content I've already recorded that I think will benefit you.:) Song recommendation: “This Is Me” from The Greatest Showman soundtrack. Listen however you get your music or listen on YouTube.com.

I hope sharing more of my suicide attempt story, the mistakes I made that can be learned from, and what I learned calling the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is helpful. Here are some useful resources featured in today's podcast:  Songs that Bring Hope--Listen to however you get your music or YouTube  Truth Be Told by Mathew West  The God Who Stays by Mathew West  Be Alright by Evan Craft, Redimi2, and Danny Gokey (There's a rap and no rap version)  Immediate Help with Suicide/Suicidal Thoughts  National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-253-8255  Speak to a Peer Specialist through a Warm Line (See below for your state)  NAMI-National-HelpLine-WarmLine-Directory-3-11-20.pdf  Crisis Textline (U.S. and Canada)  Crisis Text Line | Text HOME To 741741 free, 24/7 Crisis Counseling  Hear from Suicide Survivors  Suicide Noted Podcast  Online Therapy  Talkspace - #1 Rated Online Therapy, 1 Million+ Users  BetterHelp | Professional Counseling With A Licensed Therapist  Resource for Family and Friends to be Best Support  Home - #BeThe1To

My heart goes out to you if you are suicidal or are having suicidal thoughts! Your life matters and please stay! Even if the world or your life is a complete mess—if you go through with it, you'll never find out how good and meaningful your life could get. And your intense suffering or dark/numb nothingness can ease quicker than you think with the right help and support. Hopefully my story and insight will be of benefit. Also, I want to dedicate these 3 songs to this podcast episode that you can listen to however you get your music or look up the lyric videos on YouTube.com. #1 “No Longer Slaves” by Bethel Music. (Love the lyric video imagery of going through the woods similar to going on your own Underground Railroad to get to freedom. Also love the more unplugged lyric video of flowy white fabric to feel of God's love for you as I imagine Him in white robes wanting to encircle you in His love and comfort you in your pain.) #2 “Tell Your Heart to Beat Again” by Danny Gokey. (Love the lyric video of being on a better road than possibly this dirt one you've been on.) #3 “Worn” by Tenth Avenue North. (Also love the “Worn-video journal” by lead singer Mike Donehey.)

My “highlight reel” with bipolar disorder, and my “escape plan” to jailbreak. We can find freedom by working through our own stuff, and learning how to execute “the escape plan” in order to tunnel through our own prison walls of bipolar. In going through this important but incremental process, I believe we will discover that it then crafts our own unique key to unlock any “bipolar mind jail cell” we may get stuck in the future. Let's do this!

A little about me and the reasons why I feel compelled to do this podcast. Hope you listen to this and not skip. Both 2 intros help this podcast make more sense!:)