Toxic Masculinity - Behind The Mask

In this conversation, Alan shares his transformative journey from a traumatic childhood to becoming a successful coach and podcaster. He discusses the impact of trauma on personal growth, the importance of emotional maturity, and the shift from external success to internal fulfilment. Alan emphasises the significance of understanding one'sconditioning and paradigms, the dynamics of relationships, and the challenges faced by high achievers. He also introduces the turtle and pufferfish analogyto explain self-perception and emotional responses.Curious to learn more? Listen now.

In this conversation, Abel King shares his journey ofself-awareness and personal development, emphasising the importance of inner work, boundaries, and spiritual awakening. He discusses his transition from a life of survival to one of purpose as a life coach, helping others navigatetheir own paths to self-discovery. Abel also highlights the significance of self-awareness for both men and women and offers insights into the challenges he faced during his personal growth Journey. He encourages the listeners to commit to their innerwork and to embrace the ongoing journey of growth and transformation which can last a whole lifetime.

In this episode, Jamie talks to me about her earlier unhealthy relationships with men and why the emphasis society places on gender specific roles negatively impacted her ideas around relationships and how they should look. We discussed the importance of viewing every experience as a way of finding out more about ourselves, what we really need in our relationships in order to flourish and how to show up as our true authentic selves. Jamie has studied psychology and behavioural science and is an expert on social issues. Listen to our conversation here on spotify!

Alfredo, “The Bipolar Rabbi” has quite the story to tell! In 2013, Alfredo was arrested in New York for impersonating a police officer. He was subsequently hospitalised and diagnosed with bipolar. As a result of this, he lost his prestigious job and fell into a deep depression. After months of struggling with depression, Alfredo enrolled in a course at college to become a social worker and graduated with the highest grades. Alfredo puts this down to his determination to succeed and the power of positive psychology. Alfredo then went on to study positive psychology and now helps others to identify their strengths so they can align themselves with their goals and start to flourish in life. What is Alfredo's secret to living a contended life? He navigates everyday challenges and what is happening in the world by disengaging with social media and mainstream news. Listen to Alfredo's story now on Spotify! Enjoy

David is a trauma-informed relationship coach who specialises in working with couples, leading them to heal the wounded masculine and feminine aspects of themselves. In this episode we have an in-depth conversation about all things relationship. The ones we have with ourselves, our partners, our parents and our children. We talk about why you can't fix or save a relationship, you can only work on yourself. Which means you have to work on your stuff - those dark and not so nice aspects of ourselves that we developed over a lifetime due to the unmet needs we experienced in our childhood but have never addressed. A must listen for everyone who has ever found themselves in unhappy relationships and is ready to do the work. Listen now on Spotify.

Allan is a certified coach and trainer who works with people over 40 who want to get fit. He has also written a book called “The Wellness Roadmap” and has a successful podcast “40+ Fitness”. In this episode, Allen talks to me about how he found himself approaching 40 overweight and unfit. Almost a year into his new health regime and training to become a professional fitness trainer, he signed up to the Tough Mudder challenge with his daughter which kick-started the beginning of his new life and career. In the podcast, Allan gives tips on how to shift your mindset to accomplish your fitness goals and why you need to give yourself a minimum of 6-8 weeks before measuring your success. So what's the secret to achieving those goals without giving up too soon and what's the best way to mark your progress? Find out this and much much more now right here with Allan. Enjoy!

Victor is an author and a coach who by the age of 36 had travelled the world, had two failed marriages behind him and became a full-time single father looking after two small children. In this episode, Victor talks to me about how those different experiences helped shape him and moulded him into the person he is today with a very different outlook on the world and relationships as before. We spoke about the part toxic masculinity played in his relationship with others and how he was able to identify those traits in order to create the relationships he truly wanted and to succeed at life. Victor also shared with me how becoming a single parent changed his values and perspectives. You can find a copy of Victor's book “No Grail Without Dragons” on his website and download a free pdf copy using the code toxic masculinity. Enjoy the episode!

Keeper tells a powerful story of growing up as one of eight siblings – 4 brothers and 4 sisters. They were a tight-knit family who were about to launch a successful music career replacing the Jackson 5 when the unthinkable happened. The bombshell announcement by his mother of what his step-father had done would end up having a devastating effect on the entire family for decades to come until, that is, Keeper decided to break the silence and share his story with the world. Listen now to Keeper's heart-breaking story of despair and shame. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/shari-lewison-frisch1/message

Simon is a philosophy & applied ethics lecturer, creator of academic online courses and passionate about all topics exploring modern man and masculinity in today's society. Simon writes blogs on positive masculinity which can be found on medium.com. In this episode we discussed why the traditional role of men is dead and how patriarchy has had a devastating effect on men. Men can no longer rely on relationships to get their need to be strong and needed validated as women have their own well-paid jobs and can provide for themselves. So what do men need to do? Listen now to find out. Enjoy! --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/shari-lewison-frisch1/message

Cass is a coach who has helped thousands of men save their marriages which were on the brink of collapse due to constant fighting, lack of sex, adultery etc. Cass had been in an abusive marriage for years and openly admits that he abused his wife emotionally, physical and sexually. He had a restraining order against him and a 12-month probationary order and his wife had left him 7 times! So how was Cass able to turn his own abusive marriage around and convince his wife that the relationship was savable and that he had the power to change? Normally, being verbally and physically abusive to your partner would signal the end of the relationship which most people would struggle to come back from. It was a great conversation, so listen here to find out how Cass was able to turn his life around and help so many other men and women do the same. Enjoy! --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/shari-lewison-frisch1/message

Rachel is a child psychotherapist working in schools and in this episode she talks to me about the significant rise in the number of boys and young men who are coming to see her.   Rachel has a wealth of experience in school settings supporting students with their mental health. She advises schools on their mental health strategies and setting up counselling provisions in schools. Rachel supports young people with issues such as anxiety, eating disorders, depression and trauma. We spoke about the difference between how boys approach mental health and respond to therapy compared with girls. Although the issues aren't that different, the language we use needs to be quite different, and learning how to interact with them to unlock what is really going on beneath the anger, rage, despondency or moodiness. Rachel gives us some valuable insights and tips on how to talk about mental health with men. I hope you enjoy the episode --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/shari-lewison-frisch1/message

In this episode Gavin talks about the toxicity within the gym culture and the over-whelming need to look good and impress others. We spoke about the growing use of steroids amongst young men and boys to bulk up their muscle mass instead of working with the body as it is. We also talked about the collective, generational trauma in the south-Asian community and why they don't want to talk about mental health issues for fear of shame or blame. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/shari-lewison-frisch1/message

In this episode, I spoke to Anthony about what it is that men want in a relationship. What qualities do they value and part active part are they willing to take in supporting their partner with cooking, cleaning and taking care of the kids? Or is it the woman's role as the nurturer despite maybe working a full-time job? It's time to challenge those age-old perspectives and ask ourselves is there a different way men can show up and still remain masculine? Have a listen now. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/shari-lewison-frisch1/message

In this episode, I spoke to Sean about the mindset change that led him to go dry for the month of January in 2021. He then decided to continue for another 11 months, after which, Sean made this a lifestyle choice, dropped 100 pounds in weight, started listening to podcasts and has even written a book about his journey called "Going Dry". --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/shari-lewison-frisch1/message

Chazz Scott is an author, speaker, mindset and resilience coach. He works with under-privileged young people, running workshops on mental health and helping to equip them with the tools for the demands of everyday life. Chazz also coaches executives. We spoke about the importance of developing a morning routine by setting aside a few minutes each day, how our thoughts create our future, and how a negative mindset can affect our beliefs. Chazz also talked about overcoming depression and how applying the principles that are now in his book "Success Starts Within" got him back on track. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/shari-lewison-frisch1/message

I had a great time talking to Mac about his early introduction into the world of martial arts which lasted over 30 years. We talked about the positive teachings and role models, and how that helped to shape and form his ideals. We also talked about his book "Positive Masculinity Now" and how patriarchy and toxic masculinity limits and hurts us all. Mac is a well-known activist and speaks on gender and sexuality issues. You can find out more about Mac and his work at: positivemasculinitynow.org --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/shari-lewison-frisch1/message

In this episode, Jeff shares with me his story of overcoming his addiction to alcohol and pornography, recusing his marriage from failure and what being a positive role model to his two sons means to him. Jeff is a high-performance coach and sought after public speaker, and he has written a best-selling book "Rise, Fight, Love, Repeat - Ignite Your Morning Fire" which sets out the steps you need to take, just a few minutes every day, to become more successful in every aspect of your life. You can find out more about Jeff and the work he does at www.themorningfire.com and connect with him on his social media platforms. Want to be a guest on my podcast? Then drop me a line at shari@sharilewisonfrisch.com . Let me know your thoughts and subscribe if you've enjoyed this podcast. Until the next episode. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/shari-lewison-frisch1/message

In this episode, Joe shares with me his story of bringing up three boys aged 11, 15 and 17 one of whom has Asperger's, another has ADHD and the other son suffered with depression. It's a tough call for most parents and we talked about the importance of setting firm boundaries and expectations centred in love. Joe has also written a booked "Everyday Excellence" which is a daily reflection on where you are, what you need and how you are going to master your day. You can find out more about Joe at www.everyday-excellence.com. Drop me a line if you would like to share your story with me shari@sharilewisonfrisch.com. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/shari-lewison-frisch1/message

In this episode, I talk to Neil who is an author, meditation, mindfulness and Reiki practitioner who had a successful career as a civil law barrister. Neil embraces both his spiritual practice and his corporate background, and is the founder of The Conscious Professional offering mindfulness, resilience and emotional intelligence practices to the leaders of big corporate. We looked at how being gay in a masculine culture affected him growing up and how toxic masculine traits shows up in the corporate world. We also explored the ways a lack of positive male leadership role models has contributed to men's mental health crisis. Without self-awareness, emotional self-regulation isn't possible and showing men there is everything to be gained by their vulnerability can lead to the healing that is so much needed, as well as calling out toxic behaviour. More about Neil and his work can be found on his website https://neilseligman.com/ And if you would like to get in touch with me, send me a message at shari@sharilewisonfrisch.com --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/shari-lewison-frisch1/message

In this first episode of 2022, I spoke to Gerard Long who has written a book called “Living Hope”, which is the story of how he overcame immense personal loss of not one but two children and other close family members within quick succession. A few years later, Gerard had a Near Death Experience which transformed his life and he found his purpose which was to share his story with others, to give hope to other parents grieving the loss of a child and providing support for those struggling. Gerard and his wife also set up a charity “Awakening to Love” which has provided clean water to millions of families in India and Africa. You can find out more about Gerard's book here: www.livinghopebook.com --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/shari-lewison-frisch1/message

Lawrence Prestidge is a successful children's book author who has struggled with depression and alcohol abuse, and who lost his job as a primary school teacher because of the stigma around mental health. Arguably, mental health is a topic more widely discussed today than perhaps 5 or 10 years ago, but it doesn't mean that people are any more comfortable dealing with someone suffering from depression and struggling with their mental health. The stigma is still there but less apparent. Lawrence decided to write an autobiographical book about how he overcame depression and alcohol addiction called "The Boy Who Lost His Smile". He spoke candidly about his everyday struggles to stay alive and connected to the world without the aid of alcohol. Living with the knowledge that one day he would take his own life, an inevitability which he said he had come to terms with - a matter-of-fact. Slowly Lawrence learned to forgive himself, to make the changes necessary and to reach out for help. Now, he says, he's at peace, surrounded by people who love and support him, and raise his energy. Lawrence's story is a deep look into the many faces of depression and how faith got him through. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/shari-lewison-frisch1/message

This is a fascinating and intriguing look at how an absent or abusive father can leave psychological scars on his daughter's psyche that we aren't even aware of. The father-daughter relationship is pivotal in the life of a woman, and she grows up with a hole in her heart that she can't fill when she is denied that relationship. The absent father affects her mind, body and soul and it alters the way in which the daughter sees herself in the world, how she interacts in her close relationships and her ability to love herself. This is a story that everyone needs to listen to as we are all, in some way, affected by it. Whether we had our fathers in our lives but he wasn't there emotionally for us or he wasn't a part of our lives at all. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/shari-lewison-frisch1/message

In this episode, I talk with Bill about the 6 years he spend at a military boarding school in Nigeria where he quickly learned that crying was weak. You got more respect when you didn't cry during the regular beatings -being tough was something admirable. The toxic environment taught Bill how to become self-sufficient from an early age and what he had to do to stay out of trouble. In order to survive, Bill had to grow up fast. What the experience taught him was resilience and to keep trying no matter how hard. Fortunately, it looks like he's turned out to be a level-headed, ambitious young man. If you would like to share your story, drop me an email at shari@sharilewisonfrisch.com. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/shari-lewison-frisch1/message

In this episode, I talk to Gabriela a world-leading fertility specialist and clinical researcher, and the author of 4 books on fertility. With a 20+ year career in reproductive sciences, Gabriela gives us some incredible insights into the journey that couples have been on just to have a child of their own. Gabriela can boast a 78% success rate which is a phenomenal result! As someone who also struggled with infertility, before finally becoming a mother, I found myself relating to these couples. Gabriela's approach is holistic and looks at the bigger picture of each of the people involved - their mental state, their diet, their lifestyle - and she puts together the puzzle pieces to create a programme which is unique and individual to each couple. We also talked about the way men and women approach infertility and how men's perception of themselves is so intricately woven into their virility and how they see themselves. I'm sure you are going to enjoy this episode as much as I did. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/shari-lewison-frisch1/message

In this episode, I talk to Tim about his traumatic childhood, his long career in the sports and entertainment world and how, despite the outward appearances of success, deep down Tim was struggling. It was only when he had almost lost everything, that Tim sought help and was diagnosed with severe depression. Tim speaks openly about his self-destructive behaviour and why its so important for men to talk to each other about the real stuff and to reach out for help and support. Its a thought-provoking discussion about men and their men health. So leave a comment or a review and let me know if you enjoyed this episode. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/shari-lewison-frisch1/message

Andre is a life coach and intuitive healer, and in this episode we looked at how growing up with parents who were emotionally unavailable impacted his adult life. Andre started off his career as an accountant but found that he had a natural ability to connect with people at a deeper lever and left to become a life coach and healer of childhood trauma. It's a fascinating personal journey as well as professionally. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/shari-lewison-frisch1/message

In this episode Jim talks about the dark days during his struggle with depression and it wasn't until he admitted that he had a problem and reached out for help, that things changed for the better. Now Jim runs marathons to raise awareness of mental health and has 21 under his belt so far. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/shari-lewison-frisch1/message

In this episode, I talk with Jeff about how he combines body, mind & spirituality in his health and fitness coaching business. We discussed toxic masculinity and what positive masculinity looks like and the inequalities between the sexes. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/shari-lewison-frisch1/message

In this episode, Jack and I talk about what equality for men looks like when it benefits both sexes and encompasses the strengths that both men and women inherently possess. It's an open and very candid look at masculinity viewed from a different lens where men can also feel seen and heard. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/shari-lewison-frisch1/message

In this episode, I talk with Zach about his struggles with alcohol addiction and what it means to be a man in today's society with the expectations that society, culture and tradition places on men and boys. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/shari-lewison-frisch1/message

Trevor talks about what it was like growing up in Sheffield as a Black man in the 70's and his role now as a coach for Black men. Trevor runs a self-help group for Black men and empowers them to take charge of their lives by looking at roles they're playing and the impact this has on their mental health. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/shari-lewison-frisch1/message

--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/shari-lewison-frisch1/message