Podcasts about if susie

This is a raw conversation with a globally renowned powerhouse woman. In our chat, the incredible Susie Moore’s an open book on her past and criticism she’s facing *gasp* right now.  And yes, she’s a literal open book because her game-changing, new book is out: Stop Checking Your Likes.  In this chat, access a sneak peek into insights from this Earth-shattering life coach, columnist and author, who is a contributor to the Today Show, Oprah, Forbes, Business Insider & more. (Also seen in Oprah, Marie Claire, the BBC and beyond, she KNOWS what is up.)  You’ll hear Susie’s stories that sound like TV drama, show why no one has excuses and how you can work past anything & find your worth. Pop in those earbuds and join the conversation with this incredible author (who has 71.9K followers AND so really knows the power of STOP checking likes). Discover:  Susie’s belief: That capacity is a state of mind Why Susie feels boundaries can limit creativity The reason Susie believes there aren’t real excuses, even if you’ve had a hard past Criticism Susie’s receiving right now, especially around her book *and why she’s launching anyway* From Susie living in shelters & growing up on welfare to a divorce in her early 20s, why order can come from chaos A lot of men didn’t like she was still happy with her divorce and how she navigates other people’s opinions Her #1 rule for getting new stuff *from posts to books* into the world (it’s only 2 words) The post she wrote in 45 minutes, hungover, that ended up going viral If Susie’s brand was a designer, the brand she’d be Her favorite word *that WE ALL NEED RIGHT NOW*   FOR MORE OF SUSIE MOORE AND TO GET THIS INCREDIBLE BOOK:  THE BOOK -> StopCheckingYourLikes.com  Instagram Susie’s Website

At a family gathering, Susie’s 2-year-old son was happily running around until her mother-in-law pulled out her cane and tripped him. Susie looked on in horror as the grandmother laughed while her son cried from the fall. Then the grandmother yelled at the boy for crying, calling him a crybaby. Susie swept up her son and took him away. Later her husband asked what happened. Apparently, his mother reported that Susie was being overprotective of their son, she was coddling him, and even gave the mother an evil eye for no reason. Susie’s husband listened to a ten-minute rant from his mother about the multiple faults of Susie before he broke away. When Susie explained what really happened, her husband decided that it was time to act. As a child, Susie’s husband endured emotional, mental, and sometimes physical abuse from his narcissistic mother. He spent many years in therapy and thought that due to her age and deteriorating physical condition, she would not be a threat to his son. But he was wrong. The tripping of his son followed by the laughter and belittlement was all too familiar. This was not a pattern that he wanted to pass down to another generation. Susie and her husband decided on new boundaries to keep his mother from repeating her abusive patterns with their children. Here is what they decided. Think before speaking. Before visiting or speaking to a narcissist, remember that they are narcissistic. It might be helpful to review some of their glaring characteristics, so expectations can be more appropriately set. Once a person knows a lion is a lion, they should not expect a lamb. Susie and her husband prepared their son by telling him that it is not OK for anyone to try to hurt him (even a grandparent) and when he is hurt it is OK to cry. Boundary = I’m going to set reasonable expectations. Remember, it is all about them. It helps to have an expectation that the conversation will turn towards the narcissist. Because the grandmother felt like the 2-year-old was getting all the attention, she created an unnecessary drama designed to monopolize her son’s time. Expect that the narcissist will find a way to make things about them especially when they feel ignored. Boundary = I’m going to be judicious in giving attention. Refuse to be treated like a child. A typical tactic of narcissists is to overwhelm others into a state of heightened anxiety, so they are less able to think straight. Susie’s husband fell into this trap easily as his mother groomed him through intense interrogation as a child. This is about power and control for the narcissist. As soon as the narcissist begins, the adult should slow down their breathing. Then answer the question they wish the narcissist asked instead of the one that was asked and immediately follow it with a compliment. This disarms and distracts most narcissists. Boundary = I’m going to be treated like a peer. Reject verbal assaults. Another typical narcissistic tactic is to verbally assault anyone they believe is a threat. In this case, the grandmother felt the 2-year-old was a threat to getting more attention so she aggressive attacked him for crying. Then she saw Susie as a threat and verbally assaulted her to Susie’s husband. If Susie became defensive, the narcissist wins. Rather, Susie ignored the comments the grandmother made about her and refused to give it any weight. This unnerved the grandmother who was looking forward to an attack, so she could play the victim. By doing this, Susie did not act narcissistic. Boundary = I’m not going to act like a narcissist. Be free of victimization. Because Susie did not act inappropriately, the grandmother sought another target. Susie and her husband watched as the grandmother stirred up another drama, became the victim, and then guilt-tripped her target into submission. Their “woe is me” routine is customized to match the weakness and vulnerability of everyone. It is generally effective, or the narcissist would stop this behavior. It helps when the behavior is viewed like that of a two-year-old temper tantrum. The more positive or negative attention that the two-year-old receives, the more the performance is repeated. The key here is for negative behavior to be ignored. Just like a two-year-old, it will take several attempts before the new reality sets in and is not repeated. Boundary = I’m not going to cave to manipulation. After a period, these new boundaries became habits for Susie’s family. They did not want to eliminate contact with the grandmother because the grandfather by default would be punished as well. Rather, they set firm boundaries and openly discussed the narcissism between them so the attacks had little to no effect.   www.growwithchristine.com

At a family gathering, Susie’s 2-year-old son was happily running around until her mother-in-law pulled out her cane and tripped him. Susie looked on in horror as the grandmother laughed while her son cried from the fall. Then the grandmother yelled at the boy for crying, calling him a crybaby. Susie swept up her son and took him away. Later her husband asked what happened. Apparently, his mother reported that Susie was being overprotective of their son, she was coddling him, and even gave the mother an evil eye for no reason. Susie’s husband listened to a ten-minute rant from his mother about the multiple faults of Susie before he broke away. When Susie explained what really happened, her husband decided that it was time to act. As a child, Susie’s husband endured emotional, mental, and sometimes physical abuse from his narcissistic mother. He spent many years in therapy and thought that due to her age and deteriorating physical condition, she would not be a threat to his son. But he was wrong. The tripping of his son followed by the laughter and belittlement was all too familiar. This was not a pattern that he wanted to pass down to another generation. Susie and her husband decided on new boundaries to keep his mother from repeating her abusive patterns with their children. Here is what they decided. Think before speaking. Before visiting or speaking to a narcissist, remember that they are narcissistic. It might be helpful to review some of their glaring characteristics, so expectations can be more appropriately set. Once a person knows a lion is a lion, they should not expect a lamb. Susie and her husband prepared their son by telling him that it is not OK for anyone to try to hurt him (even a grandparent) and when he is hurt it is OK to cry. Boundary = I’m going to set reasonable expectations. Remember, it is all about them. It helps to have an expectation that the conversation will turn towards the narcissist. Because the grandmother felt like the 2-year-old was getting all the attention, she created an unnecessary drama designed to monopolize her son’s time. Expect that the narcissist will find a way to make things about them especially when they feel ignored. Boundary = I’m going to be judicious in giving attention. Refuse to be treated like a child. A typical tactic of narcissists is to overwhelm others into a state of heightened anxiety, so they are less able to think straight. Susie’s husband fell into this trap easily as his mother groomed him through intense interrogation as a child. This is about power and control for the narcissist. As soon as the narcissist begins, the adult should slow down their breathing. Then answer the question they wish the narcissist asked instead of the one that was asked and immediately follow it with a compliment. This disarms and distracts most narcissists. Boundary = I’m going to be treated like a peer. Reject verbal assaults. Another typical narcissistic tactic is to verbally assault anyone they believe is a threat. In this case, the grandmother felt the 2-year-old was a threat to getting more attention so she aggressive attacked him for crying. Then she saw Susie as a threat and verbally assaulted her to Susie’s husband. If Susie became defensive, the narcissist wins. Rather, Susie ignored the comments the grandmother made about her and refused to give it any weight. This unnerved the grandmother who was looking forward to an attack, so she could play the victim. By doing this, Susie did not act narcissistic. Boundary = I’m not going to act like a narcissist. Be free of victimization. Because Susie did not act inappropriately, the grandmother sought another target. Susie and her husband watched as the grandmother stirred up another drama, became the victim, and then guilt-tripped her target into submission. Their “woe is me” routine is customized to match the weakness and vulnerability of everyone. It is generally effective, or the narcissist would stop this behavior. It helps when the behavior is viewed like that of a two-year-old temper tantrum. The more positive or negative attention that the two-year-old receives, the more the performance is repeated. The key here is for negative behavior to be ignored. Just like a two-year-old, it will take several attempts before the new reality sets in and is not repeated. Boundary = I’m not going to cave to manipulation. After a period, these new boundaries became habits for Susie’s family. They did not want to eliminate contact with the grandmother because the grandfather by default would be punished as well. Rather, they set firm boundaries and openly discussed the narcissism between them so the attacks had little to no effect.   www.growwithchristine.com

Are you a spender or saver? Do you find it hard to stick to a budget? Do you find it difficult to save towards a goal? For some people, saving money comes easy to them. For others, it’s like pulling teeth. You might need to adopt a different investment strategy depending on your answers to the above questions.Success requires some incomeSurplus cash flow is oxygen for any financial strategy. Without it, no financial strategy can survive. As I have said in the past, it is critical that you contribute a certain amount of your income towards building your financial future every fortnight, month and year. It is virtually impossible to build wealth without surplus cash flow. Therefore, if you are spending as much as you earn, you cannot expect to get ahead financially.Basic stepsMost people are smart enough to realise that wasting money is stupid. The problem however, is that if you don’t know where your money is going how do you know if you’re wasting it or not? And that is the most common mistake that people make – not knowing where their money is going. Worse still, I find that most people consistently underestimate how much they spend. If you’re underestimating how much you spend, then possibly you’re also underestimating how much money you’re wasting. You cannot manage what you do not measure. Therefore, at an absolute minimum you must sit down every six months to understand exactly where your money is going – even if it’s at a high level. In my new book Investopoly, I have dedicated a full chapter to helping people improve their cash flow management. I provide a screenshot (click to enlarge) of page 34 below which sets out how to review your last three months of expenditure.If you’re a spenderThere are a couple of investment strategies that spenders will find it easier to stick to. The key theme in all of them is to do what Warren Buffett tells us to do which is to “invest first and then spend what’s left over”.Idea 1: Make additional super contributionsOne thing you can do is contact your payroll department and ask them to deduct a certain amount of money from each pay and contribute that into super (as a concessional contribution). This is also a tax effective strategy as any contributions are taxed at 15% instead of your marginal tax rate (for people earning less than $200,000 per annum).Technically, depending on your age and financial position, it may not be a high priority for you to make additional super contributions. For example, maybe it’s more important for you to repay your home loan. However, if the reality is that you would just spend the money that you could have otherwise contributed into super (and not make extra home loan repayments) then perhaps making additional super contributions is a good thing for you to do i.e. forced savings mechanism.Consider this case study to demonstrate how effective it can be:Susie is a 30-year-old earning a salary of $100,000 a year. Therefore, she is already contributing $9,500 per annum into super (i.e. her employer’s contributions). If Susie contributed an extra 3.5% p.a. of her gross salary (i.e. $3,500 p.a. or $67 per week), by age 60, her super balance would be 32% higher ($965,000 versus $1.27 million). That is a big reward for a relatively small sacrifice that will probably go unnoticed i.e. no adverse impact on your standard of living.Idea 2: Borrow to invest in propertyBorrowing to invest is a good forced savings mechanism. I’m not suggesting that people go out and borrow money without having any regard to their ability to meet the loan repayments. However, from my own personal and professional experience I know that there is merit in forcing yourself to enter into such a commitment (mortgage) – particularly if you’re a spender.If you borrow money to buy an investment property, it is likely that the net rental income will be less than the interest expense. Therefore, you will have to use some of your cash flow to meet the investment property’s holding costs. As long as the property is investment-grade, your monthly cash flow contribution will eventually translate into a significant amount of equity (as a result of capital growth).Idea 3: Convert loans to P&IIf you already own an investment property and feel that you’re not as disciplined as you could be with your cash flow management, then perhaps converting your investment loan repayments to principal and interest (P&I) might provide two benefits. Firstly, it will significantly reduce your interest costs and secondly, it will force you to reduce your debt.Idea 4: Delink your offset account from Internet bankingThe saying “out of sight, out of mind” rings true when it comes to financial management. One strategy that employs this approach involves establishing an offset account (linked to one of your loans) and using it purely for savings. You then ask your payroll department to deduct a regular amount from each salary and deposit that amount directly into this new savings offset account. You can also remove this offset account from your Internet banking profile so that it is out of sight and out of mind. Automating the process (via payroll) together with this ‘set and forget’ style arrangement will likely make this strategy successful.Spenders aren’t bad peopleJust because you’re a spender doesn’t necessarily mean you’ll be unsuccessful with building wealth and having a secure financial future. Instead, it just means that you probably need to employ a slightly different approach to savers. The key thing is just to be realistic about the level of your financial discipline and seek independent financial advice.

Employers must contribute 9.5% of your salary (up to a maximum of $20,050 p.a.) into super. But should you make additional super contributions? This is a question I’m asked regularly.Of course, like many financial planning matters, the answer does depend on your individual circumstances. However, there are some fundamental concepts that help us understand whether additional contributions are going to help you achieve your financial goals.The power of starting earlySusie is a 30-year-old earning a salary of $100,000 a year. Therefore, she is already contributing $9,500 per annum into super (i.e. her employer’s contributions). If Susie contributed an extra 3.5% p.a. of her gross salary (i.e. $3,500 p.a. or $67 per week), by age 60, her super balance would be 32% higher ($965,000 versus $1.27 million). That is a big reward for a relatively small sacrifice.Compare this to someone who starts a lot later in life. Matt is 50-years-old and his super balance is $400,000. Matt’s salary is $150,000 per annum so his employer is contributing $14,250 per annum into super. If Matt makes additional contributions so that his total contributions equal the concessional contribution cap (i.e. the maximum you can contribute – currently $25,000 per annum), by age 60, Matt’s super balance will only be 13% higher ($845,000 versus $955,000). I think you’ll agree that that’s a relatively small reward for a significant amount of additional contributions (approximately $100,000 in additional contributions over 10 years).The above two examples demonstrate that making additional contributions is a relatively ineffective investment strategy unless you begin making them when you’re in your 30’s. That is not to say that you shouldn’t make them as it is a good force-savings plan. However, it means that you probably need to think of other investment strategies that you can implement in addition to super contributions.Worried about locking your money away inside super?Some people choose not to make additional super contributions because they are worried that the government will change the rules on them and they won’t be able to access their savings to fund retirement. Whilst it is inevitable that the government will continue to tinker with the superannuation rules, it doesn’t mean that we should ignore super altogether. The superannuation environment provides some taxation benefits – so ignore them at your own peril. I believe that super should play a material role in most people’s retirement strategies. Of course, we need to be careful about being to super-centric – particularly for people that are more than 10 years away from being able to access their super. Suffice to say that ignoring super in totality is probably not in your best interest.Repay your home loan, invest in property, or super?It is important that you invest in the right order – as I explain in this video. For some people in their 30’s, making additional super contributions might not be the right priority. It might be more important to repay/reduce their home loan to reduce their interest rate exposure. There is no “one size fits all” solution – it really depends on your individual situation.What else can you do to boost your super?Firstly, there are three things you must optimise to maximise your super balance by the time you retire – as discussed in this video. Assuming you have done these three things correctly, what else can you do to boost your super balance? Probably the most effective strategy (and one that becomes even more attractive now that the government has reduced the concessional contribution cap to $25,000 per annum) is to use some of your super as a deposit towards investing in a property. Your super fund can then borrow the remainder of the funds to purchase said investment property. Gearing inside super is a powerful strategy for two reasons:There is more pressure on the government to reduce the tax benefits that higher income earners receive from making contributions into super. As such, tax-effectively diverting wealth into super (via contributions) will become more difficult to do. Borrowing mitigates this.For many people superannuation is a very long-term investment (20 years and beyond as most people won’t exhaust their super balance until they’re in their 80’s). This long-dated investment horizon lends itself well to a borrowing strategy (if you’ll excuse the pun) because it’s a long enough time to enjoy the immense benefits of compounding capital growth.Of course, there are non-super investment strategies to consider as wellThe point of my article is not to discourage you from making additional super contributions. On the contrary, it is never a bad idea to save/invest monies for the future. However, what I would invite you to consider is that superannuation and any contributions thereof should be only one of many things (tactics) that you are doing to build wealth. Put simply, a balanced approach typically yields the best outcomes (i.e. not being too focused on super and not ignoring it altogether either).If you have any questions about what I have discussed above, I would invite you to contact us.