Come As You Are

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Educator and bestselling author Dr. Emily Nagoski answers questions about sex with the latest science. The eight-part series is a modern guide to sexual wellbeing, backed by groundbreaking research about desire, anatomy, orgasm and much more. In conversation with her producer, Mo, Dr. Nagoski debunks cultural myths and flips the script on everything you thought you knew about sex and sexuality. Come As You Are will help you unlock your most pleasurable life, in the bedroom and beyond. New episodes drop on Wednesdays. Lead production by Monique LaBorde. Come As You Are is produced by Pushkin Industries and Madison Wells. Show art by Sofie Birkin. To hear episodes a week early and ads free, subscribe to Pushkin+ in Apple Podcasts or at pushkin.fm/plus.

Pushkin Industries


    • Feb 12, 2024 LATEST EPISODE
    • infrequent NEW EPISODES
    • 34m AVG DURATION
    • 11 EPISODES

    Ivy Insights

    The Come As You Are podcast is an absolute must-listen for anyone who wants to explore and understand their sexuality. This podcast is incredibly inclusive and welcoming, catering to all individuals, especially those who struggle with aspects of their sexuality. The episode on orgasm was particularly powerful, providing a sense of validation and normalcy that many listeners may have been seeking. Hosts Emily and Mo are kind-hearted, compassionate, and non-judgmental, creating a safe space for open discussions about sex.

    One of the best aspects of The Come As You Are podcast is the wealth of knowledge that Dr. Emily Nagoski brings to each episode. She is a fantastic sex educator who combines intelligence with humor, making the topics accessible and enjoyable to learn about. Whether it's debunking myths or discussing scientific research, Dr. Emily delivers information in an engaging way that keeps listeners hooked.

    However, there are a few downsides to this podcast. Some reviewers have mentioned feeling left out as men or feeling that the show is "man-hating." While these experiences may be valid for some individuals, it is important to note that The Come As You Are podcast aims to educate all genders and has been appreciated by male listeners as well. Additionally, while the podcast does cover a wide range of topics related to sexuality, there may be some areas that could be explored more deeply or episodes that could benefit from additional perspectives.

    In conclusion, The Come As You Are podcast is an outstanding resource for anyone looking to expand their understanding of their own bodies and desires without judgment or patriarchal influences. Driven by Dr. Emily Nagoski's expertise and her ability to make complex topics relatable, this show has the power to transform lives by providing life-changing information. Overall, this podcast deserves high praise for its inclusivity, informative content, and dedication to promoting pleasure-based conversations about sex.



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    Latest episodes from Come As You Are

    Love Lessons From the "Masters of Relationships" on The Happiness Lab

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 12, 2024 45:29 Transcription Available


    Some people are just good at building and maintaining healthy partnerships. In their "Love Lab", the married researchers Dr John Gottman and Dr Julie Schwartz Gottman have seen how certain couples interact in ways that mean they'll happily stick together for decades. Enjoy this special episode of The Happiness Lab with Dr Laurie Santos. The Gottmans join Dr Santos to explain what we can learn from these "Masters of Relationships" - so that the stresses and strains of life don't destroy our intimate partnerships. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    Introducing A Slight Change of Plans: A Science Journalist Tries to Hack Heartbreak

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 23, 2023 32:03 Transcription Available


    Here's an episode of another show from Pushkin, A Slight Change of Plans. Science writer Florence Williams felt blindsided when her twenty-five-year marriage unexpectedly fell apart. The heartbreak opened her up to a whole range of new and intense feelings, but it also made her sick. Trained as a journalist, Florence set out on an expedition to understand the science of heartbreak and game her way back to health. She tried novel forms of therapy, immersed herself in nature, and consulted cutting-edge research on the science of awe. But her greatest discovery came when she tried an alternative to “hacking” heartbreak. If you're interested in hearing more of Florence's story, listen to “Heartbreak: A Personal and Scientific Journey,” a uniquely immersive audiobook, narrated by the author and accompanied by in-the-moment diary recordings and interviews.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    The Science of Great Sex in Long-Term Relationships

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 28, 2022 36:48 Transcription Available


    A listener in his eighties wants to know if there's an expiration date on his sex life, and how to reconnect in the bedroom with his wife. Luckily, Emily is writing a new book about sex in long-term relationships. She delves deep into what the research reveals about couples who sustain a strong sexual connection over many years. Plus, she shares practical, science-backed sex advice on aging and navigating your changing body.   If you have a question for Emily, call the Come As You Are hotline at (646) 397-8557‬ or send a voice memo to emily@pushkin.fm. Tell us your pronouns and pseudonym (pick a name, any name!) Your question might be answered on the show. Books mentioned by Emily:  “Magnificent Sex” by Dr. Peggy Kleinplatz  “Black Girls Guide to Surviving Menopause” by Omisade Burney-Scott “What Fresh Hell Is This?” by Heather Corinna “Why Good Sex Matters” by Nan Wise ”Couples Sexuality After 60” by Barry and Emily MSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    Consent and "Enthusiastic Maybe"

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 21, 2022 49:49 Transcription Available


    This week, Emily answers a question from her producer, Mo, about consent. Mo and her girlfriend are considering a new sexual experience but they're not both an “enthusiastic yes” on the idea. Mo's girlfriend joins the conversation, and they delve into the idea of “enthusiastic maybe” in consent and how to handle all the comfortable, joyful, and consensual “maybes” that can come up in sex. A heads up before listening: in this conversation, we touch on difficult topics such as coercion and manipulation in sex. If this episode brings up some feelings for you, check out our resources below. If you have a question for Emily, call the Come As You Are hotline at (646) 397-8557‬ or send a voice memo to emily@pushkin.fm. Tell us your pronouns and pseudonym (pick a name, any name!) Your question might be answered on the show.    ADDITIONAL RESOURCES MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:  “ACE: What Asexuality Reveals About Desire Society” by Angela Chen  Emily learned the language of “willing consent” from Suzanne Iasenza For more on “human givers” and “human winners” read “Burnout”  Emily's Tiktok  Emily's definition of consent: “Everyone is glad to be there and free to leave with no unwanted consequences. Plus, there is no unwanted pain.”   CONSENT AND SURVIVOR RESOURCES:  RAINN on consent and information for sexual assault survivors  National Sexual Violence Resource Center Me Too Movement Resource Library   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    Sex Ed from Pop Culture

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 14, 2022 28:35 Transcription Available


    We switch things up this week as Mo challenges Emily to watch and rate a sex scene from the popular TV show “Ted Lasso." Emily rarely watches sex scenes since they often create the myths she works so hard to dispel, but she agrees to endure this torture for the good of our sex education. The scene prompts a deep conversation about vulnerability in sex, the absolute prison of masculinity, and what the dual control model can teach us about our porn habits. If you have a question for Emily, call the Come As You Are hotline at (646) 397-8557‬ or send a voice memo to emily@pushkin.fm. Tell us your pronouns and pseudonym (pick a name, any name!) Your question might be answered on the show.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    How to Improve Your Orgasms

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 7, 2022 37:42 Transcription Available


    Emily answers calls from listeners who are struggling with their orgasms, and debunks several myths about where orgasm happens in the body. She also explains how we can train our brains to change our experience of orgasm with some practice… and a little dismantling of the patriarchy. If you have a question for Emily, call the Come As You Are hotline at (646) 397-8557‬ or send a voice memo to emily@pushkin.fm. Tell us your pronouns and pseudonym (pick a name, any name!) Your question might be answered on the show.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    How Desire Actually Works

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 30, 2022 38:53 Transcription Available


    For some people, sexual desire shows up totally spontaneously and out of the blue. But that's not the case for this week's listener, who wants to have sex with their girlfriend, but isn't feeling the same excitement as they did at beginning of the relationship. Emily introduces the science of responsive desire, which is not only totally normal and healthy, but also a more common way of experiencing desire. You can take Petra Zebroff's Questionnaire for Turn-on Initiation Preferences here.  If you have a question for Emily, call the Come As You Are hotline at (646) 397-8557‬ or send a voice memo to emily@pushkin.fm. Tell us your pronouns and pseudonym (pick a name, any name!) Your question might be answered on the show. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    The Anatomy Lesson You Never Got

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 23, 2022 44:46 Transcription Available


    A man is embarrassed about his curved penis, and his partner doesn't know what to say to him because she's not sure if the curviness is normal. Emily serves up some real talk about sexual anatomy and explains that we all have the same basic genital parts, regardless of the sex we were assigned at birth. Plus, Emily and her producer, Mo, discuss how to combat poisonous cultural messages about what kinds of bodies are "normal."If you have a question for Emily, call the Come As You Are hotline at (646) 397-8557‬ or send a voice memo to emily@pushkin.fm. Tell us your pronouns and pseudonym (pick a name, any name!) Your question might be answered on the show.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    The Science of Horniness

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 16, 2022 37:14 Transcription Available


    The pandemic is really killing the mood and making it hard to prioritize pleasure. A listener calls in about losing the motivation to have sex, even with herself. To help answer the listener's question, Emily introduces groundbreaking research known as the "dual control model" and offers a simple but radical shift in the way we think about horniness.  If you have a question for Emily, call the Come As You Are hotline at (646) 397-8557‬ or send a voice memo to emily@pushkin.fm. Tell us your pronouns and pseudonym (pick a name, any name!) Your question might be answered on the show.    SHOW NOTES:  Check out Emily's free worksheets on her website to start applying the science of the dual control model to your own life.  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    Prelude: Pleasure is The Measure

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 16, 2022 24:26 Transcription Available


    In this prelude episode, educator and author Dr. Emily Nagoski argues that pleasure is the bedrock of sexual wellbeing. Emily is joined by writer and organizer adrienne maree brown, who offers advice on how to reconnect with pleasure and make it a lifelong practice.      See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    Introducing: Come As You Are

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 2, 2022 3:02 Transcription Available


    Sex educator and bestselling author Emily Nagoski answers questions about sex with the latest science. Along the way, she busts cultural myths and teaches you what's true with the help of groundbreaking research. Come As You Are will guide you towards a life with more confidence, pleasure, and joy. Coming November 16 from Pushkin Industries and Madison Wells.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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