If You'll Indulge Me

Feeling that things were not combative enough, we are launching a new segment: the Food Court. Here, Ted and Aseem debate the fates of certain controversial comestibles in the ultimate court of culinary opinion. First on the chopping block--the Danish. Does the Danish deserve to die? Find out on the first edition of the Food Court, presided over by special guest Ellen Huet.

Today in the Food Court, Ted and Aseem debate the fate of that most neutral (insipid? invitingly plain?) of grain spirits: vodka. Aseem presses for the death penalty; Ted makes a heartfelt plea for mercy, invoking special witness Carrie Bradshaw. Presided over as always by the infallible Ellen Huet.

In the world of cocktail party snacking, not all munchies are created equal. Today, Ted and Aseem contemplate perhaps the laziest possible offering: the raw vegetable-and-maybe-dip situation known as crudites. Can Aseem defend the humble vegetable platter from Ted's carnivorous strictures? Find out how omniscient judge Ellen Huet rules in this latest installment of the Food Court.

Today we take on the titan, the elephant in the dining room, the food of our times: Avocado toast. Can Aseem defend this once-humble fat-and-bread combination from Ted's puritanical onslaught against the world's hippest Insta-food? The fate of this ultimate Millennial dish rests, as always, in the capable hands of inimitable judge Ellen Huet.

Curry is a spice, right? Or is it a soupy gravy-based dish? The fact is, nobody agrees on anything about curry (except maybe that it's the name of a great basketball player). Learn where this delicious and dizzyingly varied dish comes from-- and what it's evolved into-- as Ted and Aseem explore delicacies as varied as baingan bharta, bunny chow, and whatever "buss-up shut" is.

In some countries, a dish's name is liable to be as bland as its taste. Not so in the wilds of Scotland. Join us for our very first quiz episode, in which Aseem and special guest David strive to guess what the sonorous Scots could possibly mean by such fare as "festycock" and "cullen skink." (Not to be listened to mid-meal, except by those with strong stomachs.)

More than any other meal, breakfast reveals who you are. Or at least for English speakers, who you're supposed to be. Find out what James Bond and your favorite Presidents ate for breakfast, learn what people have eaten for the Most Important Meal Of the Day through history, and be thankful you're not friends with Thomas Aquinas, who would probably disapprove of you, no matter what you eat in the morning.

Welcome to the world of Hospitaliano! as we dive into the delightfully ridiculous language of the Olive Garden in our first episode. Learn what pairs with Long Island Limoncello and discover how many dishes can possibly come from Tuscany as we explore what makes America's favorite Italian restaurant so irresistible.