Khadija And Mary

Season 2. We're baaaaack. We decided to kick things off with a 2-part episode on how our mother's made us into the women we are today. Part 1 we talked about Mary's Mom and in this episode we're talking about Khadija's Mom. So happy to be back recording! Happy Mother's Day.

We're starting season 2 strong with a special Mother's Day 2 Part Series. We thought we'd spend a little time this Mother's Day talking about our mother's and how they made us who we are today. You don't wanna miss this. We start with Mary's mom and we do Khadija's mom in part 2.

My entire goal with Anonymous Souls is to convince women that they are at their happiest when they are living in a constant state of creative flow. You get to that flow state by anchoring your life with a creative project always. Today I want to highlight the benefits of designing your life in this way.

In the Anonymous Soul community I teach women that when they have designed a life that is specific to them then they will have way less difficulty fighting their beauty blocks, i.e. the messages they are constantly receiving from the outside world that tells them that they are not good enough and that they need to spend the bulk of their energy fixing themselves. When you have a path that you designed for yourself it is clear to see what does and does not serve that journey. But how do you go about crafting that unique path that is just for you? Today I want to give you some tips that will help you get on the right track and start your Anonymous Soul journey right now.

Every 4th Wednesday of the month I offer up my lunch hour to help women get unstuck in their creative projects. You tell me where you're stuck and I help you get moving again. Today I wanted to give you some of my tricks of the trade so that you can get a sneak peek behind the curtain of my coaching program and maybe get moving that much faster.

If you've been listening to this podcast for a while you know that I am BIG on preserving your energy for what matters most to you. I believe that women get a lot of messages thrown at them around how they should be spending their time and most of those messages tell women to spend their time on how they look. I am aiming to change that with my business Anonymous Souls and with this podcast. Today I want to take just a brief moment to let you know how I can help you protect your energy or as I say "protect your bubble" so that you can have the energy for all the things you want to do most in your life.

Following up on our last episode we are coming to you with part 2 of our discussion of this very important book. This week we're talking health insurance. This is a huge topic in our country but we wanted to offer a different perspective around universal health care - an idea that we have not heard anyone talking about here in our country. As always we are not trying to change your opinion as much as we are trying to introduce new aspects and give you something ELSE to talk about. Let us know your thoughts. We love hearing from you.

Finally finally finally. You've heard us mention this book way too many times in recent podcast episodes and finally the day has come for us to give you this book review. We felt like this book which gives a fresh perspective on the way we live in America compared to the way they live in the Nordic countries is very aligned with some of the ideas we suggest on this podcast and so we had to discuss it with all of you. WE've broken the discussion up into two episodes with two different focuses in each. Today we want to focus on the two different education systems in America and the Nordic countries. We can't wait to hear what you think about this alternative system. Let us know if you agree with us or not. This episode will DEFINITELY give you something ELSE to talk about.

Mary and I have a lot of strong feelings about what women should and should not spend their energy caring about but a lot of our statements are a direct result of the privileges both of us bring to the conversation. SO before we get too far into this podcast we thought it would be only prudent and responsible of us to have an episode where we call out our own privileges that make it possible for us to think the way we think and have the discussions we have. We never want to speak from a place that does NOT acknowledge the privileges we have, and there are MANY. Take a listen and please call us out if we missed any today or if we fail to acknowledge any in the future. We love hearing from you either way.

We straighten it. We curl it. We try to control the frizz. We try to add shine. We want body but not too much body. And on and on and on. Where does it end? When are we happy? What is the ultimate goal here? The amount of energy women spend on hair is unbelievable and today Mary and I want to dig into this topic in the only way we know how in an effort to just start the discussion of could we maybe minimize how much energy we spend on our hair and even thinking about our hair and so that we can use that energy for something else. This was definitely one of topics that we realized we could have spent a whole month talking about so you may see use bring this topic up again somewhere down the road. But for now, enjoy our thoughts on HAIR. Let us know your thoughts by leaving a comment and rating our podcast. Thank you.

As you know, Mary and I like to sit around discussing the important topics that we think could change the world and make it a better place. We refuse to waste any more of our energy on things like: the latest diet or fashion trend and how to make ourselves conform to society's current beauty standard. We call those beauty blocks. AND we have set out to encourage you to shift your energy away from beauty blocks and onto more important topics like today's topic - Reparations. What does America owe the descendants of slaves? How can we make it truly equitable and justified? Will reparations ever really give black people the healing they deserve? We had a few ideas about this and we thought we'd share them with you. Once again just giving you something ELSE to talk about.

In the Anonymous Soul community we identify 5 major beauty blocks that plague women THE MOST and Clothing is one of them. On today's episode we talk about the massive amount of energy that women spend on deciding what to wear each day and how our internal dialogue about how we look is affected by the fashion industry and beauty culture. We also explored how the pandemic and being quarantined for a year has affected our "rules" about clothing and whether or not things will change permanently. It was a fun conversation that could obviously go on for hours and hours but we did our best to cover it all in an hour. Leave a comment and let us know how you feel about this very big beauty block.

What started off as general chat before we got to our episode ended up being the entire episode because Mary got so worked up that we ended up having a very important discussion about racism, and journalism, and a lot of other things that it was hard to title this one but in general the theme of the hour was "Mary is Angry" so that's what we called it. Mary, who rarely uses the term "angry" to describe her emotional state these days, did in fact get very angry today. Find out what got her all fired up on today's episode and see if you agree with her.

Here is part of two of our conversation on comparing and competing. It started off with a focus on competing but once again we realized that comparing came into play so much in the conversation that it was better to join the two conversations and call it a part 1 and part 2. We think this episode talks more about competing but you may disagree. The point is, we believe that both topics need to be discussed and women need to check themselves on both of these energy-sucking habits. Enjoy the episode!

We started this episode off with a plan to talk about Comparing and why women feel the need to constantly compare themselves to each other. We knew that the topic of Competing would come up as the two are linked but we didn't realize how much until we listened to the replay. And so, what we ended up doing was connecting our "comparing" episode with our "competing" episode and embracing the strong links between the two by doing a Part 1 and Part 2. I hope you enjoy and I hope that we offer some helpful tips on how to stop this unhealthy cycle that is robbing you of so much precious energy that you could be using to do things that truly make you happy. So go listen and then stop comparing (and competing).

So of course we can't talk about why we had babies and not talk about the all important question - why do people get married? Especially in today's age when there isn't as much or a moral stigma around people living together without being married. Has the rate of marriage gone down? What are people's motivation for getting married? We get into all our own theories and a few statistics but of course if you don't hear your own reason in our list, please leave us a comment and let us know why you decide to or decided not to get married. We'd love to know your thoughts. Our opinions are not the only ones. We're here just to give you something else to think about.

With all this talk about what it means to be a woman who works and has a family and all the inequities our society has built into that dynamic, of course it brought us to the question - why do we have babies in the first place? What is it that makes adult human beings want to intentionally raise children? Is it pressure from society that this is something we MUST do? Is it family legacy desires? Issues of feeling our own mortality? We talk about all this and more on this episode. If we don't mention your personal reason for deciding to have or not have kids, please let us know what yours is. We'd love to get as many viewpoints as possible. As always, we're just trying to give women something else to talk about.

Our very first interview! Yay! When we dreamed of this podcast we envisioned getting new and interesting conversations started amongst all women. We hoped that we would spark some lively debates about topics that we don't feel women speak enough about. BUT - we are not saying that our opinions on these topics are the only opinions to have, quite the contrary. To us, there is not necessarily a right or wrong on these subjects but simply that these subjects are not talked about enough. And so one of our goals is to get other women on to our podcast to give us their opinion and their perspective. I am so excited to have my old college friend, Jyl, on the show to discuss the oh-so important topic of what it means in today's society to have both a full time job and a family. Jyl is a mother of a 3 year old boy, she is married, and she has a high level engineering job in the corporate world. Listen to what she has to say and let us know what you think. We want to hear from you too!

Mary and I have been wondering if everything we've been saying on this podcast makes us big ole hypocrites? Is it possible to live into adulthood and not become a hypocrite at some point? It occurred to us that actually our hypocrisies highlight the dynamic complexity of the types of conversations we are encouraging women to engage in. Indeed our hypocrisies need to be a part of the conversations. Therefore, we decided before we get too far into this podcast adventure to call ourselves out on our own bullshit just so that it's out in the open and we can all agree that to have these types of discussions and not have a little bit of hypocrisy mixed in is damn well near impossible. The key, we both agree, is to recognize it in yourself and call it out. We hope you enjoy and have a little fun acknowledging your own hypocrisies right along with us.

Why do we as women have so much trouble accepting compliments? Why do we look for compliments and then have such trouble accepting them once we get them? And why does society teach us to compliment women on how they look first and foremost? This is the topic of today's podcast episode. Leave us a comment on how well you do at receiving and giving compliments. When it comes to compliments, what do you struggle with? We'd love to hear about it.

Today we're talking about one of the 5 biggest beauty blocks - AGE! That's right. We started off talking about getting older and wiser and how to deal with society's obsession with youth as the standard of beauty but then we got into a really interesting conversation on Ageism that we totally did not plan. It's a really great conversation and it will give you A LOT to think about and definitely to talk about.

This week Mary and I explore some of the traditions of "traditional American" wedding. We ask the question of do some of these traditions even make since in today's society considering their origin story. We also have an interesting conversation about the relationship between the type of wedding a woman has and the type of marriage she has. This one is juicy and highly controversial. You don't wanna miss it.

Here we go. This is probably our most controversial topic to date. It is also the topic that Mary and I feel the most strongly about and have the biggest opinions about. Why are women still changing their last names when they get married? Why are we holding on to a tradition that was part of a larger tradition that we do not participate in. Why did this one thing survive the dismantle of all of those older, outdated traditions. What does it mean to the feminist movement at-large when women are still changing their names when they get married? Does it matter? We think it does. We think it matters A LOT. Tune in and let us know your opinions. We really want to engage with you in this conversation.

Amy Schumer said a thing on Instagram that sparked an very interesting conversation between Mary and me. It shined a light on all of our conflicting beauty blocks and asked the big question - Who has the right to say "I don't care about my looks." It's a very intriguing question that brings up a lot of our mainstream messages about beauty and how we define it. This is a good one!

Ladies! What's the deal? We apologize way too much! Let's figure out why we do that and how we can stop! We're on a mission to change the way women talk and it starts with the over-apologizing. Listen in and let us know what you think by leaving a comment and a review!

Nowadays we always find ourselves talking about how long we can wait to have kids and whether or not time will be on our side? But what if we flipped that societal norm on its head and asked the question - what's too early? Is there a such thing as too early and why? On this episode, Mary and I explore the possibility of having kids super early on purpose and what that would mean for the woman and more importantly, what would we as a society have to change to make that the social norm? It's a juicy topic and you won't wanna miss it!

Do we, as women, owe the next generation anything OR do we have the right to make our life choices solely to please ourselves? Dig into this topic with us as we explore, birth control; the decision to have babies and work or not; contributions from women past; and much more.

What is a beauty block? Why is it so important to understand beauty blocks and what do they have to do with your energy, your happiness, and fulfilling your wildest dreams? I talk about all of this in this short but important solo-hosted episode. This is the foundation of Anonymous Soul and this podcast.

This episode is a coaching session with me, your host, Khadija. I give you some of my best pointers for how to shut out the noise and finally get started on a project you've been waiting forever to do. The time is now. No more waiting, no more excuses. Let's do this thing!

It's true what they say - humor is pain plus time. It took us a long time to be able to laugh about our weight loss stories. This is part 1 of Khadija and Mary's hilarious journey from obsessing about weight loss to body acceptance and finding better things to do with our energy. This is a funny story that we will share in pieces throughout season 1 of this podcast. You won't wanna miss this!

Talking about the infamous Instagram post by Lizzo that sparked a big conversation about the body positivity movement and what is expected of the leaders of this movement - what do they owe their audience? do they owe us anything? Where does body love and health intersect? We get into all this and more in this juicy episode.

Why are we doing this podcast? What can you expect from us? How did Khadija and Mary meet and what was the basis of our friendship? This is the funniest origin story you won't wanna miss! This will give you a taste of our style, our wit, and our thoughts on all issues female. It's gonna be a hoot! Join us.