Just a Couple of Arselings: A Last Kingdom Podcast

CW: Descriptions of violent scenes. Hosts Alyssa Fikse (@lyssiefikse) and Jessica Toomer (@jessica_toomer) are crushed that season 4 has come to an end. As the Danes and Saxons work through their differences, there is new hope for peace between Edward, Aethelflaed, and Sygtrygger. Meanwhile, Uhtred and Brida have to face off one last time. What does The Last Kingdom even look like with peace? As we hope for a fifth season, let's remember what it's all about: destiny is all, bitches.

In a special edition of Just A Couple of Arselings, hosts Jessica Toomer (@jessica_toomer) and Alyssa Fikse (@lyssiefikse) welcome Mark Rowley who plays Finan to chat about all things Season 4.

The Danes have an easy time of things while invading Winchester while Aethelflaed is crowned Lady of Mercia and Edward makes plans to secure their Northern borders. Just A Couple of Arselings hosts Jessica Toomer and Alyssa Fikse might be ready to bow to a new king after this episode, y'all.

Hosts Alyssa Fikse (@lyssiefikse) and Jessica Toomer (@jessica_toomer) are a little heartbroken at some romantic developments in episode 8 of 'The Last Kingdom's fourth season, but we are so glad to see Aethelflaed get the credit that she deserves. Things in Mercia are looking pretty dicey with everyone attempting power grab, and some things won't be fixed with some religion and nudity. Can Edward put aside his pride and accept his sister as Mercia's ruler? Meanwhile, Sigtrygger continues to grow in power in the North, and we are just about ready to join his fan club. Things are getting *dramatic* to say the least.

There's a new Viking warlord in town on "The Last Kingdom" and Just A Couple Of Arselings hosts Jessica Toomer and Alyssa Fikse have officially joined his fan club. While the Danes keep busy in Wales, Uhtred considers an intriguing offer in Mercia where things are ... TENSE.

Hosts Alyssa Fikse (@lyssiefikse) and Jessica Toomer (@jessica_toomer) were not quite emotionally prepared to handle a plague episode, but here we are. As Uhtred and the Cookham Crew are on the run with a gaggle of children, Aethelflaed works to be reunited with her daughter, Aelfwynn. Edward struggles to keep things under control in Mercia as he deals with the infighting amongst the Aelderman. With all of this drama happening, "the sickness" also finds its way to Mercia and people have more crazy ideas about how it's spread than your grandma's Facebook page.

SYFY Wire Fangrrls writers Alyssa Fikse (@lyssiefikse) and Jessica Toomer (@jessica_toomer) mourn the loss of Aethelred, who served Mercia with grace and dignity for three seasons ... Just kidding. This guy was an arsehole and now, we dance on his grave!

SYFY Wire Fangrrls writers Alyssa Fikse (@lyssiefikse) and Jessica Toomer (@jessica_toomer) are stressed to the max in this episode because all of our faves are in grave danger. The tension building between the Danes and Saxons (and the many factions within) comes to a head at the Battle of Tettenhall. As Uhtred and Aethelflaed lead the Mercians into battle, the question remains: will Edward show up? How pissed will he be when he gets there? Who will we lose on the battlefield? Tune in for episode 4 and obsess with us over every use of terrain and swing of the sword.

In a special edition of Just A Couple of Arselings, hosts Jessica Toomer (@jessica_toomer) and Alyssa Fikse (@lyssiefikse) welcome Alexander Dreymon to chat about all things Season 4. That means character deaths, new enemies, break-ups, and a game of Viking Superlatives that lets fans get to know the cast of The Last Kingdom in a surprising new way.

Things get heavy on The Last Kingdom’s third episode so consider this episode your much-needed therapy episode. SYFY Wire Fangrrls writers Alyssa Fikse (@lyssiefikse) and Jessica Toomer (@jessica_toomer) are your unlicensed, unofficial grief counselors and they’re going to get you through the loss of *that* major character. Well, the wine and junk food will get you through it, but they’ll be there to cry along with you. Also, Alexander Dreymon joins us to chat about that devastating character death and how Uhtred can move forward.

SYFY Wire Fangrrls writers Alyssa Fikse (@lyssiefikse) and Jessica Toomer (@jessica_toomer) are ready for Uhtred to take back his birthright, but sadly things do not go according to plan. As Uhtred tries to build a relationship with his son, the troubles in Mercia seem worse than ever. Will Aethelred completely ruin everything in his pursuit for more power? Will Edward start the ska band that his hair seems to demand? Is Aelswith awesome now? We break down every twist and turn in the second episode of The Last Kingdom's fourth season.

SYFY Wire Fangrrls writers Alyssa Fikse (@lyssiefikse) and Jessica Toomer (@jessica_toomer) are back on their bullsh*t for Season 4 of The Last Kingdom. Uhtred seems finally ready to reclaim his birthright but first, he’s got to get the old crew back together and rescue his son from that monk life. Edward is struggling to fill his father’s shoes while Aelswith sees her influence at court curbed by the ambitious Aethelhelm. New players. Old Enemies. Surprising Hookups. TLK is back and better than ever.

Hosts Alyssa Fikse and Jessica Toomer return for season four of SYFY Wire Fangrrls' Just A Couple Of Arselings: The Last Kingdom Podcast season 4. Don't miss a single episode as we discuss destiny, Danes, and who Uhtred will defeat next. Subscribe wherever you get your podcasts.

SYFY Wire Fangrrls writers Alyssa Fikse (@lyssiefikse) and Jessica Toomer (@jessica_toomer) rage about the death of Thyra, a literal angel who did not deserve to go out the way she did. As if losing his sister weren't bad enough, Uhtred must lead a very green Edward into battle against a formidable Viking army, and he's still got the problem of Aethelwold to solve. Things really went to sh*t quick once Alfred died, didn't they?

SYFY Wire Fangrrls writers Alyssa Fikse (@lyssiefikse) and Jessica Toomer (@jessica_toomer) are thrilled to see Uhtred and Alfred get real about their relationship and all that they’ve done together to build Wessex. There are hurt feelings that run deep, but Alfred is able to make amends before he dies. And die he does, to the dulcet tones of Aelswith haranguing him for his choices regarding Uhtred. While everyone deals with the king’s passing, Thyra is harassed for being a Dane living among the Saxons. It’s enough to break your heart, and it’s a horrible side effect of Aethelwold’s scheming. Edward’s ascension is tenuous, so will he be able to become king at all, or will it be snatched away?

SYFY Wire Fangrrls writers Alyssa Fikse (@lyssiefikse) and Jessica Toomer (@jessica_toomer) finally get what they’ve wanted all season in the eighth episode of The Last Kingdom’s third season. After torturing Uhtred and his men with her curse for way too long, Skade finally shuffles off this mortal coil before she can convince Uhtred to attend Burning Man with her. Meanwhile, Alfred prepares for Edward’s wedding while pretending that he’s not getting perilously close to death’s door. Aethelwold is attempting to stir up dissent wherever he goes, while Aelswith is NOT OK with the possibility of Uhtred advising Edward after Alfred’s death. As Uhtred and Alfred meet for one final conversation for the good of England, will they be able to get past years of frustration and work together for the good of England?

SYFY Wire Fangrrls writers Alyssa Fikse (@lyssiefikse) and Jessica Toomer (@jessica_toomer) regroup for the seventh episode of The Last Kingdom's third season which takes that whole "eye for an eye" proverb to the extreme. Uhtred has a return to form, making blasphemous jokes and rallying his troops to finally get Skade back. He's on fire ... or at least, setting things on fire as he tricks Cnut into leaving camp and reunites with an old friend. Meanwhile, Bloodhair's breathing his last thanks to Skade (RIP buddy) and Aethelwold is begging for mercy from Alfred after returning to Winchester and receiving a less-than-warm welcome.

SYFY Wire Fangrrls writers Alyssa Fikse (@lyssiefikse) and Jessica Toomer (@jessica_toomer) saddle up for the sixth episode of The Last Kingdom's third season which sees the return of our favorite medieval duo. Brida and Uhtred join forces to get Ragnar out of Niflheim while back at Viking headquarters, the Danish warlords struggle just to get along. Skade probably has something to do with it. But no matter. Brida and Uhtred are on the hunt for a different seer, one we've met before, who may know how to break his curse and free Ragnar from the depths of hell. No pressure.

SYFY Wire Fangrrls writers Alyssa Fikse (@lyssiefikse) and Jessica Toomer (@jessica_toomer) recap the fifth episode of season three, the one that welcomes a new member to the Uhtred Ragnarson fan club. With Alfred wasting away, Edward steps up to the plate, aligning himself with Uhtred who swallows his pride and rides with Aethelflaed to seek help in defeating Haesten from his former bro. While he's getting judged by a fake wittan, Brida's mourning the loss of Ragnar and the Danes are scrambling to find a new leader. Will Uhtred get Skade back? Will Brida align with Cnut? Will Aethelflaed just kill her turd of a husband already?

SYFY Wire Fangrrls writers Alyssa Fikse (@lyssiefikse) and Jessica Toomer (@jessica_toomer) return for the fourth episode of the season and the battle for Skade is on. Uhtred is determined to keep her by his side — she has put a curse on him and all — and he’s willing to kill for it. Everyone else wants her dead and gone, but Uhtred is the boss and what he says goes. Uhtred heads to Mercia to offer aid to Aetheflaed. He arrives at the nunnery, and while the abbess is suspicious of his gruff demeanor and dirtbag undercut, Aetheflaed welcomes him with open arms and even a little flirting. It’s all very nice. Until king of the douchebags Haesten shows up and ruins everything. Again. Also ruining everything? Aethelwold. His paranoia is through the roof, so he decides to kill Ragnar before Ragnar can kill him. It’s terrible, it’s cowardly, it’s not what Ragnar deserved. #justiceforragnar

SYFY Wire Fangrrls writers Alyssa Fikse (@lyssiefikse) and Jessica Toomer (@jessica_toomer) are worried about Uhtred in the third episode of this season. He may claim to be “a Dane for life,” but his men didn’t sign up for this and Leofric continues to haunt him. After working so hard to build Wessex, can Uhtred justify being instrumental in tearing it down? Elsewhere in Mercia, Aethelflaed is alerted to the fact that Aethelred wants her dead. Husband of the year over here! She flees with her closest people and sends word to Uhtred begging for help. Beocca brings Uhtred the letter and reminds him of the good times in Wessex. If he goes to help Aethelflaed, Ragnar tells him that it’s over and to never come back. Will Uhtred FINALLY make a choice over which side he’s on? It’s only been two and a half seasons of angst.

SYFY Wire Fangrrls writers Alyssa Fikse (@lyssiefikse) and Jessica Toomer (jessica_toomer) wade through the emotional wreckage caused by Alfred and Uhtred's nasty break-up. After Uhtred kills a monk and holds his king at knifepoint, the bromance is officially over and Uhtred heads North to reunite with his Viking family. But first, he's got to survive the journey, a septic spear wound, some disturbing hallucinations, and a witch's curse. And you thought the end of your last relationship was rough.

SYFY Wire Fangrrls writers Alyssa Fikse (@lyssiefikse) and Jessica Toomer (@jessica_toomer_) return for season three of The Last Kingdom, ready for a more mature Uhtred. Of course, the world won’t let our favorite Danish Saxon live a life in peace for too long, and a new villain is here to bring hell to Wessex: Skade. She’s got various magic tricks and curses at her disposal, and she’s got her sights set on Uhtred. It’s a mess. Elsewhere in the realm, Alfred’s health is deteriorating at a rapid rate, Aethelflaed is miserable in her marriage to the wretched Aethelred, Edward is decidedly not ready to be king, and there is possibly the most tragic death yet. It’s A LOT. Welcome back to The Last Kingdom, where everything can and will end in chaos.

SYFY Wire Fangrrls writers Alyssa Fikse (@lyssiefikse) and Jessica Toomer (@jessica_toomer_) have survived the second season of The Last Kingdom, but some of our favorites have not. Erik and Aethelflaed’s plan to escape is a desperate one, and perhaps not even Uhtred can help them be together forever. Odda and Alfred are at odds over when and how to unite the armies of Wessex, leading to some betrayal, murder, and hurt feelings. Think a playground fight between besties with much higher stakes. Will Wessex succeed in driving the Danish threat from England, or will Alfred’s hubris finally be his downfall?

SYFY Wire Fangrrls writers Alyssa Fikse (@lyssiefikse) and Jessica Toomer (@jessica_toomer_) fangirl their way through the penultimate episode of season two of The Last Kingdom. Aethelflaed gets taken by the Danes, and if you thought that was bad news, you would be incorrect. Our favorite lady of Mercia finds true love with the lover of shoulder pads, Erik himself, and these two offer viewers a tragic romance for the ages. Back in Wessex, things are less lovey dovey. No one can agree on how to handle this hostage situation, and the kingdom is getting hammered on all sides. Will Alfred listen to Uhtred’s counsel or will he continue to put too much faith in the loathsome Aethelred? Unfortunately, you probably already know the answer to that one.

SYFY Wire Fangrrls writers Alyssa Fikse (@lyssiefikse) and Jessica Toomer (@jessica_toomer_) take on episode six of season two of The Last Kingdom, where we see the worst marriage since the Red Wedding. Aethelred is immediately the Worst Husband Ever while also working to further the divide between Alfred and Uhtred. Erik and Siegfried continue to cause problems for the Saxons, and honestly, we kind of respect their game. Alfred soon learns that cutting Uhtred out of battle plans can only lead to disaster. You would think he would have realized that by now, but Alfred never, ever learns. On the plus side, Uhtred and Gisela continue to prove that there is such a thing as loving and supportive couples in Wessex. Who knew?!

SYFY Wire Fangrrls writers Alyssa Fikse (@lyssiefikse) and Jessica Toomer (@jessica_toomer) break down episode five of season two of The Last Kingdom, picking up three years after the wild events of the last episode. Our man Uhtred has been enjoying relative peace, but alas, that was never going to last. Alfred asks for help, and does it in the bitchiest way possible. Those meddlesome Viking brothers are back (obviously they were never going to respect that truce) so the Cookham crew has work to do. A dead man starts dealing out prophecies, and if you’re going to plan your life around something, it should definitely be the words of a corpse.

SYFY Wire Fangrrls writers Alyssa Fikse (@lyssiefikse) and Jessica Toomer (@jessica_toomer) cheer on Uhtred in episode four of The Last Kingdom’s second season as he spends his time dealing out hella justice after being freed. After a season and a half of dealing with other things, Uhtred and Ragnar FINALLY unite to avenge their father and rescue Thyra from Kjartan and One-Eyed Sven. We’ve been clamoring for this moment since the pilot episode, and it delivers. Also, wedding bells ring for Uhtred and Gisela, so consider us SWOONING.

SYFY Wire Fangrrls writers Alyssa Fikse (@lyssiefikse) and Jessica Toomer (@jessica_toomer) are always Team Uhtred, but episode three of the second season is Peak “Give Uhtred A Hug” time. Everyone’s favorite alderman is lost at sea in nightmare conditions. Alfred’s indifference doesn’t seem so bad now that Uhtred has been sold into slavery by Guthred and is worried about his feet rotting off in standing water. Back in Wessex, marrying off Aethelflaed becomes Alfred and Aelswith’s main focus, and boy, do they pick a prize winner. Jk, Aelthelred is terrible! The future queen deserves better!

SYFY Wire Fangrrls writers Alyssa Fikse (@lyssiefikse) and Jessica Toomer (@jessica_toomer) tackle episode two of season two of The Last Kingdom, and while we may have been optimistic about Uhtred’s chances at happiness in the last episode, that fleeting bit of goodness was short lived. Sure, he’s found the love of his life, Gisela, but people are not as quick to get on board as the lovebirds may have hoped. All the while, Uhtred must deal with some particularly meddlesome priests. Plus, Hild is busy dealing with her PTSD in a particularly violent and satisfying way.

SYFY Wire Fangrrls writers Alyssa Fikse (@lyssiefikse) and Jessica Toomer (@jessica_toomer) are back with the premier of season two of The Last Kingdom and Uhtred still isn’t getting the respect he deserves! Sure, he basically carried Wessex on his back last season, but does that mean that Alfred gives a hoot? Of course not! We’re introduced to two new bad boys, Siegfried and Erik, who are determined to make their mark on England and our hearts and parts. Also, there’s a new king in England who just might give Uhtred what he’s looking for.

SYFY Wire Fangrrls writers Jessica Toomer and Alyssa Fikse wrap up the first season of The Last Kingdom by covering the show’s biggest battle yet. Uhtred and Alfred team up to take on Guthrum and Ragnar but before the bloodshed, there’s plenty of backstabbing and luxurious sex scenes to keep things interesting. Oh, and someone jumps over a shield wall.

SYFY Wire Fangrrls writers Jessica Toomer and Alyssa Fikse recap the penultimate 7th episode of The Last Kingdom’s first season with a nuanced, critical deep-dive into the geographical logic of medieval battle strategies … Just kidding, they’re bullsh*tting about that Swamp Life, exiled kings, tonics for bowel disorders and women taking charge during a siege.

SYFY Wire Fangrrls writers Jessica Toomer and Alyssa Fikse cover episode six of The Last Kingdom which sees most of our heroes behaving very badly. Uhtred and Leofric go raiding and pillaging which turns out to be not so kosher, and we meet the OG “Becky with the good hair,” the Shadow Queen Iseult.

SYFY Wire Fangrrls writers Jessica Toomer and Alyssa Fikse try to survive the fifth episode of the first season of The Last Kingdom while bidding a fond farewell to a chaotic villain we’ve all (surprisingly) come to love. But first, they’ve got to cover battle strategies, kidnapped wives, and the importance of choosing a good sorcerer in Viking-Era England.

SYFY Wire Fangrrls writers Jessica Toomer and Alyssa Fikse discuss the good, the bad, and the ugly of The Last Kingdom’s fourth episode. Our boy Uhtred gets married and his royal weddings gift turns out to be some farmland and massive debt. We’ve all been there, Uhtred. The ladies also cover a Ragnarson family reunion and ship a new Viking couple.

SYFY Wire Fangrrls writers Jessica Toomer and Alyssa Fikse are back on their sh*t, recapping everything that went down in season one, episode three of The Last Kingdom – or, as they fondly call it, “The One Where Dudes Talk In Rooms.” Uhtred’s giving into his worst instincts and Brida is not having it, which means they’re not having it. Join in as they geek out over training montages, investigate the allure of medieval dirty talk, side-eye priests, and shout out the return of The Dark Crystal in their “Geek Out” corner.

SYFY Wire Fangrrls writers Jessica Toomer and Alyssa Fikse revisit the second episode of The Last Kingdom which introduces fans to the ultimate medieval f*ckboi in between fireside humping sessions. They also make the case for shoving sticks up more problematic mens’ a**es and geek out over another historical TV show you’ll probably love.

SYFY Wire Fangrrls writers Jessica Toomer and Alyssa Fikse kick things off by recapping the first episode of Netflix’s The Last Kingdom. They’ll introduce the major players, navigate the bloody battles, and examine the thirstiest moments with some smart takes (but mostly smutty humor). Tune in as they rank the BDE of Viking warriors, muse about the state of feminism in medieval England, and debate the benefits of ice bathing before calling out their favorite characters of the episode, shame nunning the biggest turds, and predicting what’s next for our heroes.

Join Fangrrls Jessica Lynn Toomer and Alyssa Fikse as they take you back in time and through every episode of Netflix's The Last Kingdom. Relive every battle, every backstab, and every thirst trap. Subscribe now so you don't miss out on any delicious moments; and remember, destiny is all.