Being a people-pleaser sucks. Join writer and recovering people-pleaser Anthony Petaros as he explores all the self-sabotaging behaviors, habits, and mindsets that have historically hindered positive growth in our lives. Learn how to consciously craft an unapologetic life and identity outside the shackles of compulsive pleasing.
In this episode we're hacking our way into the laser-laden chamber of the mind that represents our "Vault of Self Worth." Anthony shares his own past propensities to see his inner vault as an empty and echoing Scrooge McDuck money bin. He then details how we recovering people-pleasers must learn to 10x our gold coin deposits of internal positive self-regard in order to offset the pernicious reality of our ever-present negativity bias.
In this episode we're sifting through the murky waters of our convoluted nature versus nurture pie chart, as well as the hierarchical complexities of our value structures. Anthony breaks down the fixed versus growth mindset, and highlights some of his own limiting value sets that have historically dictated his actions as a people-pleaser.
In this episode we're sifting through our presentational facade and getting to the core of why we struggle showcasing our authentic selves in relationships. Whether it's with friends, family, coworkers and aquaintances, or simply a back-and-forth with the local barista, how we present ourselves to the world as people-pleasers is yet another way we limit flourishing and true expression in our lives.
In this episode we're tackling the tricky and sticky tripwire topic of the victimhood mentality/victim mindset. Anthony does his best to explain and differentiate this self-debilitating mental complex as it pertains to people-pleasing, as well as acknowledging the all too real and pervasive reality of victims/victimization found throughout our society today.
In this episode we're pulling out all the punches when it comes to healthfully managing our feelings around anger. Whether it's perpetual conflict avoidance, the desire to self-soothe, or our inability to see being mad as an acceptable emotion, it's time to come out of our bruised and bloodied internal Fight Club of One basements.
In this episode we're talking about patience and the importance of allowing ourselves to take a moment...for ourselves. Tony discusses how western society and culture has made us increasingly averse to practicing patience and lays out a few ways we can slow down a bit and be more intentional with our time.
In this episode we're talking all about the oh-so-fun topic of cheating in relationships. Tony wades through the hard won wisdom gained through infidelity and how people-pleasing within his marriage led him to "caring in all the wrong ways" with his now ex-wife.
In this episode we're looking at the growth-fostering process of pruning the areas of our lives that are no longer serving us. Tony gets into his own hedge-hacking journey and discusses the imperativeness of effective sleep hygiene.
In this epsiode we look at the people-pleasing impulse of denying our needs through the potentially alluring lens of the lone wolf. We'll try and hack down the door of our isolated cranial cabins and finally let our needs be known.
In this episode we try and swallow the tough pill of seeing our suffering as a choice. Tony gets into his own expanding relationship around the topic and discusses how the inner-narratives we create are keeping us shackled to suffering in unnecessary ways.
In this episode we're talking all about people-pleasing the bearded boss upstairs in the clouds. Tony recalls his early experiences in the Christian church and how the unholy trinity of fear, shame, and guilt led him to pleasing Jesus and God.
In this episode we weave our way through the mazes of high school, college, and career paths as people-pleasers. Tony discusses his own struggles in these areas and how "The Industrial Education Complex" has served as an exacerbation vehicle for people-pleasing behaviors.
In this episode we discuss the concept of people-pleasers being liars in a bit more depth. Tony also proposes a few ways that we might upend these misguided tendencies. Whether it's lying to ourselves, to others, (or most likely both), no one is benefiting from this distorted form of veiling the truth.
In this episode we discuss the oh so lovely trauma response of "fawning" that serves as a coping mechanism within our modes of people-pleasing. Are you a Fawn Star? Maybe it's time we chuck that baby deer mentality into a trebuchet and let it fly out of our lives for good.
In this epsiode we look at how the people in our lives affect our pleasing tendencies in distinct ways. Each person possesses a unique gravitational pull on our desire to please that we may or may not be aware of consciously. We'll introduce what Tony calls our "Celestial Pleasing Chart", which will give us more insight and awareness around all of our people-pleasing blind spots.
In this episode we discuss some of the smaller, yet pernicous ways in which people-pleasers unwittinlgy make silent sacrifices to the people around them on a daily basis.
In this episode we discuss some of the limiting mindsets and self-sabotaging behaviors that so many of us people-pleasers struggle with.