Podcasts about Psychology

A lot of us have a complicated relationship with movement - blamed, shamed, or stuck in routines that don't truly serve us. But what if movement wasn't about perfection, punishment, or performance? What if it was a powerful tool for connection, self-care, and resilience? This week, we're diving deep into the psychology behind group fitness and movement's ability to heal, empower, and transform lives. From JVN's personal journey of finding community through yoga and gymnastics to hosting a joy-filled adult gymnastics experience with Airbnb, he explores how movement can help us reclaim our mental health, confidence, and sense of belonging. We break down how to create inclusive, nurturing spaces that honor the whole person - taking into account family stress, gender identity, trauma, and systemic barriers - so movement becomes a source of liberation, not shame.  Dr. Tess Kilwein, a sports psychologist, is dedicated to making group fitness accessible and affirming for all bodies and minds. Her work on the psychology of movement shows us that movement is a radical act of self-love and collective healing. Wanna see JVN on stage? Get tix to the Hot & Healed Comedy Tour here.  Full Video Episodes now available on YouTube.  Follow Dr. Tess Kilwein @unapologeticpsych  Follow us on Instagram @gettingbetterwithjvn Jonathan on Instagram @jvn Executive Producer, Chris McClure Producer, Editor & Engineer is Nathanael McClure Production support from: Chad Hall Our theme music is also composed by Nathanael McClure. Curious about bringing your brand to life on the show? Email podcastadsales@sonymusic.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

I sat down with Stu McLaren to unpack something I think a lot of financial advisors are missing right now…Your value isn't just in the financial plan. It's in the relationships, community, and sense of belonging you create around your clients. Stu built one of the earliest online membership businesses, sold it successfully, and has spent years helping entrepreneurs build thriving communities that people never want to leave. In this conversation, we talk about what advisors can learn from that world—and why retention has less to do with performance reviews and more to do with human connection. We also go deeper into the emotional side of money, why so many successful people keep moving the goalposts, and how advisors can stop overwhelming clients with information and start creating real momentum instead. And beyond business, Stu shares one of the most powerful mindset shifts around money and impact I've heard in a long time. From building schools in Kenya to creating unforgettable experiences for others, this conversation is a reminder that business can become a vehicle for something much bigger than yourself.3 of the biggest insights from Stu McLaren…#1.) Community Is the Moat That Protects Your BusinessStu explains why relationships and belonging are becoming more valuable than information—especially in a world where AI is making knowledge easier to access. Advisors who intentionally create connection between clients build deeper loyalty, stronger retention, and a business competitors can't easily replicate.#2.) Clients Don't Need More Information, They Need SimplicityA lot of advisors accidentally overwhelm clients by trying to explain everything at once. Stu shares how creating a simple “success path” helps clients focus on the next right step instead of getting buried in spreadsheets, projections, and complexity.#3.) Money Becomes More Meaningful When It Fuels ImpactStu opens up about the mindset shift that changed his relationship with money forever. Instead of feeling guilty about success, he realized that making more money gave him the ability to create more impact—for charities, communities, friends, and families around the world.Free Gift:Get access to Stu's book, Predictable Profits.SHOW NOTEShttps://bradleyjohnson.com/170FOLLOW BRAD JOHNSON ON SOCIALXInstagramLinkedInFOLLOW DBDL ON SOCIAL:YouTubeTwitterInstagramLinkedInFacebookDISCLOSURE DBDL podcast episode conversations are intended to provide financial advisors with ideas, strategies, concepts and tools that could be incorporated into their business and their life. No statements made in the episode are offered as, and shall not constitute financial, investment, tax or legal advice. Financial professionals are responsible for ensuring implementation of anything discussed related to business is done so in accordance with any and all regulatory, compliance responsibilities and obligations. The Triad member statements reflect their own experience which may not be representative of all Triad Member experiences, and their appearances were not paid for. Triad Wealth Partners, LLC is an SEC Registered Investment Adviser. Please visit Triadwealthpartners.com for more information. Triad Wealth Partners, LLC and Triad Partners, LLC are affiliated companies.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Theo Jaffee and Sophia Puccini speak with economist Robin Hanson about prediction markets, gambling, and why he believes speculative markets are one of the most powerful tools humans have for aggregating information and forecasting outcomes. The conversation begins with Minnesota's recent law criminalizing prediction markets before expanding into the broader backlash surrounding platforms like Kalshi and Polymarket. Hanson explains his long-term vision for “decision markets,” where markets could help guide choices made by companies, governments, and even individuals. Along the way, they discuss sports betting, games and human psychology, futurism, AI, and Hanson's broader work on how societies misunderstand risk, incentives, and coordination Resources: Follow Robin Hanson on X: https://x.com/robinhanson Follow Theo Jaffee on X: https://x.com/theojaffee Follow Sophia Puccini on X: https://x.com/schisofrenia Stay Updated:Find a16z on YouTube: YouTubeFind a16z on XFind a16z on LinkedInListen to the a16z Show on SpotifyListen to the a16z Show on Apple PodcastsFollow our host: https://twitter.com/eriktorenberg Please note that the content here is for informational purposes only; should NOT be taken as legal, business, tax, or investment advice or be used to evaluate any investment or security; and is not directed at any investors or potential investors in any a16z fund. a16z and its affiliates may maintain investments in the companies discussed. For more details please see a16z.com/disclosures. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Want more peace, presence + intuition in your life? Click here to download 6 Free Guided Meditations from The Miracle of You: https://www.alyssanobriga.com/miracleofyou-richard   ==== What if just 5 minutes a day could change your brain, body + life? In this episode of The Healing + Human Potential Podcast, I sit down with Dr. Richard Davidson, a Harvard-trained psychologist + meditation researcher, to explore the science of meditation, neuroplasticity + what it really means to flourish. Richard shares why meditation isn't about stopping your thoughts, how even small daily practices can create measurable change + why flourishing is a skill we can cultivate through awareness, connection, insight + purpose. We also explore what long-term meditators reveal about the brain, how emotions can move through us without becoming who we are + the fascinating research around Tibetan monks, death + consciousness. If you've ever felt like your mind is too busy to meditate, or wondered whether meditation is actually working, this episode offers a grounded, science-backed path back to presence. ====   Guest Bio: Davidson received his Ph.D. in Psychology from Harvard University in 1976. His research is broadly focused on the neural bases of emotion, emotional style, and methods to promote human flourishing, including meditation and related contemplative practices. He has published over 600 papers, numerous chapters and reviews, and has edited more than 20 books. Davidson released his newest book, Born to Flourish, with Cortland Dahl in March 2026. Together, they bring neuroscience and contemplative science to the exploration of well-being and meaning amid the growing challenges of modern life. The book focuses on small, evidence-based practices while also examining the broader societal conditions shaping attention, emotion, and human connection.  Davidson is also the author, with Sharon Begley, of The Emotional Life of Your Brain (2012), and co-author, with Daniel Goleman, of Altered Traits (2017). He was named one of the 100 most influential people in the world by Time Magazine in 2006, elected to the National Academy of Medicine in 2017, and appointed to the Governing Board of UNESCO's Mahatma Gandhi Institute of Education for Peace and Sustainable Development (MGIEP) in 2018. In 2014, Davidson founded Humin (formerly Healthy Minds Innovations), a global nonprofit with a mission to make wellbeing real by translating science into action.   Guest Links: Center for Healthy Minds, University of Wisconsin-Madison: https://centerhealthyminds.org/ Humin: https://www.humin.org/ Personal Website: https://www.richardjdavidson.com/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/richard-j-davidson/ Born to Flourish with Cortland Dahl: https://flourishingbook.com/ Instagram: @drrichiedavidson Twitter/x: @RichieJDavidson Substack: @richarddavidson393706   ====   Website: alyssanobriga.com Instagram: @alyssanobriga TikTok - @alyssanobriga Spotify - https://open.spotify.com/show/6b5s2xbA2d3pETSvYBZ9YR Apple Podcast - https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/healing-human-potential/id1705626495   ====   Alyssa Nobriga International, LLC - Disclaimer This podcast is presented solely for educational and entertainment purposes. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or any other qualified professional. We shall in no event be held liable to any party for any reason arising directly or indirectly for the use or interpretation of the information presented in this video. Copyright 2023, Alyssa Nobriga International, LLC - All rights reserved.

In this supersize solo episode, Melissa breaks down the Summer House reunion trailer and the most recent Summer House & In the City episodes. Melissa discusses Lindsay and Carl's closure, including a discussion about how her mother wounds lead to conflict. Melissa breaks down the moments of manipulation seen on the episode, discussing triangulation, paltering, and using semantics to evade accountability.Melissa then discusses The Valley, discussing verbal abuse, addiction and trauma responses.New ep out every Tuesday! THANK YOU FOR LISTENING and for all the support!Please follow YBT podcast and give a 5-star comment & rating (it really helps!)Please follow @yourbishtherapist on Instagram, YouTube, Patreon, and FB.For full video (ad free, early release, full video & bonus content) visit YBT Patreon, Spreaker Supporters Club or YouTubePatreon (Ad Free, Early Release, Full Video, Bonus Content) https://patreon.com/YourBishTherapist?utm_medium=unknown&utm_source=join_link&utm_campaign=creatorshare_creator&utm_content=copyLinkApple Podcast (Ad Free): https://apple.co/3MfskzeSpreaker Supporters club (Ad Free, Early Release):  https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/your-bish-therapist--6065109/supportYouTube (Full Video): https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCu8bmVPTlWANg5v7rGRJjow?subconfirmation=1To find links to all YBT content: https://linktr.ee/yourbishtherapistBrand Ambassador: www.Iamhumanthebrand.com for clothing with a purpose. Code BISH20 for 20% off purchaseTDisclaimer: Posts are not intended to diagnose, treat or provide medical advice. Your Bish Therapist (YBT) is for entertainment and informational purposes only. The podcast, my opinions, and posts, are my own and are not associated with past or present employers, any organizations, Bravo TV, Grey Heart productions or any other television network. The information in YBT podcast and on its its social media is provided for general informational purposes only and is not intended to diagnose or treat. Please do not act or refrain from acting based on anything you read, see, or hear on YBT, podcast or associated social media. Communicating with YBT via email, and/or social media does not form a therapeutic alliance. Melissa, operator of YBT, is unable to provide any therapeutic advice, treatment or feedback.

Our oldest has things to share!Our website is HERE:  System Speak Podcast.You can submit an email to the podcast HERE.You can JOIN THE COMMUNITY HERE.  Once you are in, you can use a non-Apple device or non-safari browser to join groups HERE. Once you are set up, then the website and app work on any device just fine.  We have peer support check-in groups, an art group, movie groups, social events, and classes.  Additional zoom groups are optional, but only available by joining the groups. Join us!Content Note: Content on this website and in the podcasts is assumed to be trauma and/or dissociative related due to the nature of what is being shared here in general.  Content descriptors are generally given in each episode.  Specific trigger warnings are not given due to research reporting this makes triggers worse.  Please use appropriate self-care and your own safety plan while exploring this website and during your listening experience.  Natural pauses due to dissociation have not been edited out of the podcast, and have been left for authenticity.  While some professional material may be referenced for educational purposes, Emma and her system are not your therapist nor offering professional advice.  Any informational material shared or referenced is simply part of our own learning process, and not guaranteed to be the latest research or best method for you.  Please contact your therapist or nearest emergency room in case of any emergency.  This website does not provide any medical, mental health, or social support services. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★

Klein, W., Li, S., & Wood, S. (2023). A qualitative analysis of gaslighting in romantic relationships. Personal Relationships, 30(4), 1316-1340.Specifically talk about it around 25 minutes  and 42 minutes Klein, W., Wood, S., Forget, A. A., & Bartz, J. A. (2026). A historical review of gaslighting: Tracing changing conceptualizations within psychiatry and psychology. Clinical Psychology Review, 102742.Was under review when we filmed - accepted and early access now Klein, W., Wood, S., & Bartz, J. A. (2026). A theoretical framework for studying the phenomenon of gaslighting. Personality and Social Psychology Review, 30(2), 195-215.I call it the 2025 paper, cause it was accepted and early access online in 2025, but I guess now it gets 2026 in the citation info, because the issue its technical in is the January issue. Which is annoying, because it's cited as 2025 in some places lol. Info on other stuff I brought uphttps://www.amazon.ca/This-Your-Brain-Music-Obsession/dp/0452288525Barton, R., & Whitehead, J. A. (1969). THE GAS-LIGHT PHENOMENON. The Lancet, 293(7608), 1258–1260. https://doi.org/10.1016/S0140-6736(69)92133-3First psychiatric gaslighting paper, don't think its open access thoughStark, C. A. (2019). Gaslighting, misogyny, and psychological oppression. The monist, 102(2), 221-235.11 minute mark - reasonable disagreement - I thin it's open accessClark, A. (2013). Whatever next? Predictive brains, situated agents, and the future of cognitive science. Behavioral and Brain Sciences, 36(3), 181–204. https://doi.org/10.1017/S0140525X12000477Around the 19 minute mark de Bruin, L., & Michael, J. (2021). Prediction error minimization as a framework for social cognition research. Erkenntnis, 86(1), 1-20.Also around the 19 minute mark Friston, K. (2010). The free-energy principle: a unified brain theory?. Nature reviews neuroscience, 11(2), 127-138.Around the 22 min mark Ogunfowora, B., & Bourdage, J. S. (2026). Is My Boss Gaslighting Me? Uncovering the Nomological Network of Gaslighting In Leader-Employee Relationships. Journal of Management, 01492063261426014.Workplace gaslighting 29 minute markBashford, J., & Leschziner, G. (2015). Bed partner “gas-lighting” as a cause of fictitious sleep-talking. Journal of Clinical Sleep Medicine, 11(10), 1237-1238.Contemporary case study discussed around 30 minute mark Bellomare, M., Giuseppe Genova, V., & Miano, P. (2024). Gaslighting exposure during emerging adulthood: Personality traits and vulnerability paths. International journal of psychological research, 17(1), 29-39.Miano, P., Bellomare, M., & Genova, V. G. (2021). Personality correlates of gaslighting behaviours in young adults. Journal of Sexual Aggression, 27(3), 285-298.2 papers on personality and gaslighting - 35 minute mark Graves, C. G., & Samp, J. A. (2021). The power to gaslight. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 38(11), 3378-3386.Gaslighting and power  35 minute mark https://www.amazon.com/Gaslighting-Interrogation-Methods-Psychotherapy-Analysis/dp/1568218281Covert control  - 37 minute mark - cults 46 minute mark Support the show

Rai Cornell, CEO and Strategic Marketing Consultant at Cornell Content Marketing, helps B2B businesses become industry standouts by creating long-term demand-generation strategies and eliminating costly and unnecessary short-term tactics like ads. Rai uses a psychology-driven marketing approach to ensure businesses attract prequalified, emotionally engaged buyers. Rai's journey began when she shifted from a career in mental health to marketing, realizing that traditional marketing methods failed to create meaningful connections. Leveraging her experience as a freelance writer since 2007 and psychologist since 2012, Rai is revolutionizing the way marketers connect with ideal buyers in our digital-everything world. Through her journey, Rai developed "The ELITE Method," a framework that guides businesses to deeply understand their ideal buyer's psychology, build lasting demand-generation systems, and transform their brand reputations for long-term success and thought leadership. Connect with Jon Dwoskin: Twitter: @jdwoskin Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jonathan.dwoskin Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thejondwoskinexperience/ Website: https://jondwoskin.com/LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jondwoskin/ Email: jon@jondwoskin.com Get Jon's Book: The Think Big Movement: Grow your business big. Very Big! Connect with Rai Cornell:Website: https://www.cornellcontentmarketing.com LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/raicornell Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/cornellcontentmarketing *E - explicit language may be used in this podcast.

Christian MacLeod is the Director and Lead Investigator of the A.C.A.P.S. (American Cryptid and Paranormal Society), bringing more than twenty-five years of hands-on experience researching cryptid sightings and paranormal phenomena. Driven by a deep respect for Native American tribal cultures, folklore, and oral traditions, Christian combines historical context with investigative fieldwork to better understand unexplained events. His research interests extend into a wide range of fringe and historical subjects, including the occult, UFO phenomena, forbidden archaeology, secret societies such as the Freemasons and Knights Templar, and longstanding allegations of governmental cover-ups and conspiracy theories.Christian holds a Bachelor's degree in Psychology with a minor in Criminology from the University of South Florida, along with a Master of Arts in Teaching from Western Carolina University. He is currently completing a second Master's degree in American History at Western Carolina University and plans to pursue a PhD in the field. Through A.C.A.P.S., he has collaborated for many years with renowned researcher Joshua P. Warren, working to apply scientific methodology to fringe phenomena. This partnership has placed A.C.A.P.S. at the forefront of several notable investigations and expeditions, including recent research efforts connected to the discovery of a hidden tunnel system beneath Asheville, North Carolina.Spaced Out Radio is your nightly source for alternative information, starting at 9pm Pacific, 12am Eastern.  We broadcast LIVE every night. -------------------------------------------------------You can now join the Space Traveler's Club;Join us at  https://www.patreon.com/sor_space_travelers_club  --------------------------------------------------------Grab Our Latest Spaced Out Radio Gear At:http://spacedoutradio.com/shop  It's a great way to support our show!--------------------------------------------------------OUR LINKS:TWITTER: https://www.twitter.com/spacedoutradio   FACEBOOK:https://www.facebook.com/spacedoutradioshow  SPACED OUT RADIO - INSTAGRAM:https://www.instagram.com/spacedoutradioshow  DAVE SCOTT - INSTAGRAM:https://www.instagram.com/davescottsor   TWITCH: https://www.twitch.com/spacedoutradioshow  WEBSITE: http://www.spacedoutradio.comGUEST IDEAS OR QUESTIONS FOR SOR?Contact Klaus at bookings@spacedoutradio.comBecome a supporter of this podcast: .Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/spaced-out-radio--1657874/support.

As Israel's genocide in Gaza continues and Lebanon faces ongoing aggression and political pressure to capitulate, many people are grappling with fear, exhaustion, and despair.But what if hopelessness itself is part of the strategy?Psychoanalyst and author Lara Sheehi joins Dispatches with Rania Khalek to discuss the psychological dimensions of fascism, empire, colonial violence, and resistance — from Israeli psychological warfare and sexual humiliation as a tool of domination, to the weaponization of sectarianism in Lebanon, the role of media propaganda, and why revolutionary optimism is itself a political act.Sheehi also discusses her new book, From the Clinic to the Streets: Psychoanalysis for Revolutionary Futures, and explains why the work of Frantz Fanon is more urgent than ever.Topics include:Psychic militancy and psychological warfareHow fascism reshapes society psychologicallyIsraeli violence, humiliation & dominationLebanon, sectarianism & capitulation politicsWhy empire depends on despairThe limits of liberalismThe politics of the wellness industryMedia propaganda and psychological controlRevolutionary optimism and resistance

Ever look up and realise a whole month has vanished? This episode is about why that happens — and how to get more life out of the same amount of time. Most people think time speeds up because they're busy. Not quite. Time speeds up when your brain stops noticing. When your days are repetitive, distracted, and half-lived, your memory writes almost nothing down. That's why a week of scrolling disappears, while one difficult, vivid, meaningful afternoon can feel strangely rich. In this episode, I break down the psychology of time perception using examples from TikTok, procrastination, ADHD, novelty, and emotional reframing. The big idea: a full life isn't made from more hours. It's made from more moments that feel real. We talk about why discomfort often stretches time, why autopilot erases it, and how learning to stay with tension can make you calmer, sharper, and more alive. Add novelty on purpose: new places, new conversations, new experiences. Notice when you're escaping discomfort instead of living through it. Use memory as a metric: if nothing stands out, something needs to change. If time keeps slipping through your hands, this episode will help you hold it differently. UPGRADE to ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Premium⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠:

Telling people not to listen drove three times more podcast listeners than telling them why they should. That's behavioral science at work, and most marketers are barely scratching the surface of it.This week, Elena, Angela, and Rob are joined by Phill Agnew, host of "Nudge," the UK's number one marketing podcast. Phill breaks down the hidden psychology that shapes how consumers think and buy, from why visible effort makes your brand more valuable to how scarcity can be applied in ways that go far beyond a "limited time offer." You'll walk away with principles you can apply immediately... and a few that might change how you think about advertising altogether.Topics covered:•    [03:00] The labor illusion: why showing your work increases perceived value•    [05:00] What System 1 vs. System 2 thinking means for marketers•    [12:00] Costly signaling and why TV advertising commands trust•    [17:00] The mere exposure effect•    [24:00] Distinctiveness vs. differentiation and how to stand out•    [33:00] Scarcity done right: the KFC Australia example.•    [40:00] The Pratfall Effect and why admitting weakness builds brand likability.To learn more, visit marketingarchitects.com/podcast or subscribe to our newsletter at marketingarchitects.com/newsletter.Resources:Buell, R. W., & Norton, M. I. (2011). The labor illusion: How operational transparency increases perceived value. Management Science, 57(9), 1564–1579. https://doi.org/10.1287/mnsc.1110.1376 2018 The Choice Factory Book: https://www.richardshotton.com/the-choice-factory Behavioral Business Book by Richard Chataway: https://www.amazon.com/Behaviour-Business-behavioural-science-business/dp/0857197347 Phill Agnew's LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/phill-agnew/Get more research-backed marketing strategies by subscribing to The Marketing Architects on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you listen to podcasts.

What does a lifelong atheist do when his dead father appears above him in the emergency room? Author and war reporter Sebastian Junger nearly bled to death in 2020 from a ruptured aneurysm, and what he saw in those moments sent him on a journey into physics, near-death experiences, and the nature of consciousness itself. In his third appearance on EconTalk, Junger discusses his remarkable book In My Time of Dying with host Russ Roberts. He reflects on covering wars from Sarajevo to Afghanistan, the strange phenomenon of dying people seeing the dead, and why he's still an atheist. Along the way, Junger offers a powerful meditation on terror and reverence, blessing and wounding, and why understanding life's fragility might be the most sacred gift of all.

What keeps us from being more social? Nick Epley calls it a “mind-reading mistake.”We all think about what others think, particularly what they think about us. The problem, says Nick Epley, is that we're almost always wrong.Epley is a professor of behavioral science at the University of Chicago Booth School of Business and author of A Little More Social: How Small Choices Create Unexpected Happiness, Health, and Connection. What keeps people from engaging authentically, connecting deeply, and enjoying a meaningful social life? It comes down to an error of social cognition, “A mind-reading mistake,” Epley says. “If I don't think you want to talk to me, I won't try. And I'll never find out that I'm wrong about that.”In this episode of Think Fast, Talk Smart, Epley and host Matt Abrahams explore why we hold ourselves back from meaningful conversation, and what happens when we don't. From taking an interest in others to sharing more freely about ourselves, Epley shares strategies for being a little more social — and making your life considerably better as a result.To listen to the extended Deep Thinks version of this episode, please visit FasterSmarter.io/premium.Episode Reference Links:Nick EpleyNick's Book: A Little More SocialEp.133 From Good to Super: How Supercommunicators Unlock the Language of Connection Connect:Premium Signup >>>> Think Fast Talk Smart PremiumEmail Questions & Feedback >>> hello@fastersmarter.ioEpisode Transcripts >>> Think Fast Talk Smart WebsiteNewsletter Signup + English Language Learning >>> FasterSmarter.ioThink Fast Talk Smart >>> LinkedIn, Instagram, YouTubeMatt Abrahams >>> LinkedInChapters:(00:00) - Introduction (01:31) - Problems with Body Language (04:15) - Perspective Getting (07:14) - Asking Better Questions (08:41) - Moving Beyond Small Talk (10:13) - Why We Hold Back (11:33) - Advice For Introverts (15:17) - A Little More Social (18:34) - The Final Three Questions (24:45) - Conclusion

AI is changing everything.But the real disruption isn't technology—it's leadership.In this powerful episode of Mindset Mastery Moments, Dr. Alisa Whyte sits down with Silicon Valley leadership strategist Victoria Mensch to unpack what leaders are getting wrong about AI transformation, burnout, and the future of work.With over 25 years leading innovation in Silicon Valley, a PhD in Psychology, and an MBA from Berkeley, Victoria shares why the greatest challenge leaders face today isn't artificial intelligence—it's the inability to adapt mentally, emotionally, and strategically.Together, they explore:Why AI amplifies uncertainty and exposes mindset gapsThe leadership qualities AI can never replaceHow burnout silently impacts high performers and executivesWhy success without alignment leads to exhaustionThe V.I.T.A.L Method for sustainable, burnout-proof leadershipHow to lead with emotional intelligence in an AI-driven worldWhy flourishing—not survival—should become your baselineVictoria also opens up about pivoting careers, redefining success, and the mindset shift that transformed her life after multiple reinventions.If you're a leader navigating pressure, disruption, reinvention, or uncertainty, this conversation will challenge how you think about success, resilience, and the future of leadership.Listen now and learn how to lead without losing yourself in the process.Exclusive Resources for LeadersEquip yourself with the tools to navigate disruption and avoid the burnout trap:Free Leadership Insights: Access Victoria's curated resources and guides for high-performing executives: Silicon Valley Executive Academy ResourcesOur Story: Learn more about the mission behind the academy: The SVEA StoryConnect with Victoria MenschLinkedIn: Connect with VictoriaInstagram: @victoria.menschAcademy Website: svexecutive.academy"The greatest innovation a leader can make is not in their product, but in their own capacity to adapt and flourish amidst uncertainty."Send us Fan MailSupport the show

Welcome back to the Building Your Money Machine Show! Today, we're getting real—breaking down the psychology and mindset of people with outrageously high financial IQs. We're not talking “get-rich” hype or born-with-it talent. I'm sharing the seven game-changing traits I've seen after three decades as a CPA, entrepreneur, and money mentor—stuff that ANYONE (yup, you too!) can learn and put into play, starting right now.I'll reveal the difference between just making money and actually building lasting freedom. You'll hear why most money lessons are caught, not taught, why your income might be a shiny leash, and what to do so your brain stops sabotaging your money goals. If you ever wondered why your bank account doesn't reflect your hard work—this one's for you.So if you're ready to take off the training wheels and start building your financial future with intention—tune in. It's time to master your money and live a life by choice (not by paycheck).IN THIS EPISODE, I COVER:Why financial IQ isn't a gift—it's a skill you build (and the stats prove it)The real goal behind money: buying back your TIME, not just incomeWhy ownership (not effort) is the secret sauce to financial freedomHow flipping the wealth-building formula instantly changes your futureThe biggest money trap: letting emotions drive your decisions (and how to stop)Ready to ditch the paycheck treadmill and start building your OWN money machine? Hit play and let's do this.RECOMMENDED EPISODES FOR YOUIf you liked this episode, click here to enjoy these and more:https://melabraham.com/show/When Does Investment Income Finally Beat Your Day JobI'm Politely Begging You To Get Good with MoneyEvery Financial Trap Middle Class People Fall Into ExplainedRich People Don't Buy Luxury...They Buy These 8 ThingsPsychology of Families Who Stay Rich For GenerationsRECOMMENDED VIDEOS FOR YOU If you liked this video, you'll love these ones:When Does Investment Income Finally Beat Your Day Job: https://youtu.be/bRyW3hxzRac I'm Politely Begging You To Get Good with Money: https://youtu.be/tEJ89xF2ZZ0 Every Financial Trap Middle Class People Fall Into Explained: https://youtu.be/kn5nCbd5FOU Rich People Don't Buy Luxury...They Buy These 8 Things: https://youtu.be/clc7oX7VJUQ Psychology of Families Who Stay Rich For Generations: https://youtu.be/phB_2VcYPbA ORDER MY NEW USA TODAY BESTSELLING BOOK:Building Your Money Machine: How to Get Your Money to Work Harder For You Than You Did For It!The key to building the life you desire and deserve is to build your Money Machine-a powerful system designed to generate income that's no longer tied to your work or efforts. This step-by-step guide goes beyond the general idea of personal finance and wealth creation and reveals the holistic approach to transforming your relationship with money to allow you to enjoy financial freedom and peace of mind.Part money philosophy, part money mindset, part strategy, and part tactical action, these powerful frameworks will show you how to build your money machine.When you do you'll also get over $1100 in wealth resources & bonuses for FREE! TAKE THE FINANCIAL FREEDOM QUIZ:Take this free quiz to see where you are on the path to financial freedom and what your next steps are to move you to a new financial destiny at http://www.YourFinancialFreedomQuiz.com

Support Dr. Grande on Patreon: ⁠https://www.patreon.com/drgrande⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Dr. Grande's book Harm Reduction: ⁠https://www.amazon.com/Harm-Reduction-Todd-Grande-PhD/dp/1950057313⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Dr. Grande's book Psychology of Notorious Serial Killers: ⁠https://www.amazon.com/Psychology-Notorious-Serial-Killers-Intersection/dp/1950057259⁠ Check out Dr. Grande's merchandise ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://teespring.com/stores/dr-grandes-store⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What do you do when your mind feels like the Drake Passage—violent, unpredictable, and overwhelming? In this episode, we break down what it actually takes to survive extreme conditions, both at sea and in your mental health.This isn't about powering through. It's about learning how to stay on the ship.What We Cover:Why the Drake Passage is so brutal—and why no one is surprised by itThe myth of “toughing it out” vs. adjusting to real conditionsHow tools like meclizine and scopolamine parallel mental health supportThe “stay low and hold on” strategy for emotional survivalBreaking overwhelming time into manageable momentsWhy asking for help isn't weakness—it's survivalThe core mindset shift: you don't have to control the waves, just don't go overboardThrive With Leo Coaching: If you want to reduce your psychological pain, regain your purpose and forge your own path, go to www.thrivewithleo.com to begin your journey.If you or anyone you know is considering suicide or self-harm, or is anxious, depressed, upset, or needs to talk, there are people who want to help:In the US: Crisis Text Line: Text CRISIS to 741741 for free, confidential crisis counseling. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 or 988The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386Outside the US:International Association for Suicide Prevention lists a number of suicide hotlines by country. Click here to find them.

If you've ever wondered why you can know exactly what's ruining your life and still keep going back to it anyway, this episode may completely change the way you understand addiction, anxiety, trauma, and even your own personality.In this deeply eye-opening conversation, Dr. Q explains that addiction is often not about pleasure or self-destruction at all. It's about survival. More specifically, it's about a nervous system trying desperately to regulate itself.Drawing from her experience working in methadone clinics, her doctoral research, and polyvagal theory, Dr. Q breaks down how different substances can serve different emotional and neurological functions. Why some people are drawn to stimulants like cocaine or meth, why others gravitate toward heroin or alcohol, and why many people cycle between uppers and downers depending on what emotional state they're trying to escape, numb, or control.Most importantly, this episode gives listeners practical, actionable tools to start regulating their nervous system without substances:Dr. Quenicka, better known as “Dr. Q,” is a clinical psychologist specializing in addiction, trauma, emotional resiliency, and nervous system regulation. Born and raised in Indonesia, Dr. Q moved to the United States as a young adult, went on to graduate with honors from UCLA, earned three master's degrees, and received her Ph.D. in Clinical Psychology from Fielding Graduate University.Her research in neuropsychology has been published in multiple academic journals, and her clinical work focuses on helping people heal through self-compassion, empowerment, cultural understanding, and hope. With experience ranging from severe mental illness and brain injury treatment to women's intensive outpatient recovery programs, Dr. Q brings both deep expertise and extraordinary warmth to the conversation.Today's episode is brought to you by ⁠⁠⁠⁠Seasons ⁠⁠⁠in Malibu. For over 18 years, Seasons has been a sanctuary for individuals seeking to reclaim their lives from addiction and mental health challenges. Our story began with a simple but profound vision: To create a luxurious sanctuary for individuals struggling with addiction or mental health issues, where they can receive the finest, evidence-based treatment in the world.Built on Compassion, Driven by ExcellenceWhat started as a small number of compassionate professionals has grown into one of the nation's most respected luxury treatment centers. But growth has never meant losing sight of what matters most—the individual engaging with our therapists, one-on-one, taking the courageous first step toward healing.From the beginning, we understood that truly transformative treatment requires more than clinical protocols. It demands a personalized approach, led by the most qualified professionals, in an environment that nurtures the whole person. That's why we've assembled a team where every primary therapist holds a Doctorate in Psychology - a distinction virtually unmatched in our field.Check out ⁠⁠⁠⁠Seasons Malibu⁠⁠⁠⁠ online or call 1-866-314-5160 for more information.Connect with Seasons on ⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠DM me on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Message me on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Facebook⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Listen AD FREE & workout with me on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Patreon⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Connect with me on ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠TikTok⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Email me chasingheroine@gmail.comSee you next week!

If you enjoy this episode, we're sure you will enjoy more content like this on The Occult Rejects.  In fact, we have curated playlists on occult topics like grimoires, esoteric concepts and phenomena, occult history, analyzing true crime and cults with an occult lens, Para politics, and occultism in music. Whether you enjoy consuming your content visually or via audio, we've got you covered - and it will always be provided free of charge.  So, if you enjoy what we do and want to support our work of providing accessible, free content on various platforms, please consider making a donation to the links provided below.  Thank you and enjoy the episode!Links For The Occult Rejectshttps://linktr.ee/theoccultrejectsOccult Research Institutehttps://www.occultresearchinstitute.org/Cash Apphttps://cash.app/$theoccultrejectsVenmo@TheOccultRejectsBuy Me A Coffeebuymeacoffee.com/TheOccultRejectsPatreonhttps://www.patreon.com/TheOccultRejectsBibliographyThe Mechanics of Magick: Singing Bowls and the Ritual Physics of ResonanceCore Singing Bowl ResearchStanhope, Jessica, and Philip Weinstein. “The Human Health Effects of Singing Bowls: A Systematic Review.” Complementary Therapies in Medicine 51 (2020): 102412. Use for the honesty frame: promising findings around mental health and cardiovascular measures, but limited evidence and need for stronger study design.Cai, Yiqing, Guo-Yan Yang, Yibo Liu, Xiang-yun Zou, Heng Yin, Xinyan Jin, Xue-han Liu, Chenlu Wang, Nicola Robinson, and Jian-Ping Liu. “Therapeutic Effects of Singing Bowls: A Systematic Review of Clinical Studies.” Integrative Medicine Research 14, no. 2 (2025): 101144. Use for the newer clinical overview. Important correction: this appears as 101144, not 101176. Good for anxiety, depression, sleep quality, cognition, autistic behavior, and EEG-related outcomes while still keeping the evidence cautious.Lin, F. W., et al. “Effects of Tibetan Singing Bowl Intervention on Psychological and Physiological Health in Adults: A Systematic Review.” 2025. Useful as another recent review angle, especially for psychological health, physiological measures, HRV, and brainwave-related discussion. Keep it secondary behind Stanhope and Cai.Landry, Jayan Marie. “Physiological and Psychological Effects of a Himalayan Singing Bowl in Meditation Practice: A Quantitative Analysis.” American Journal of Health Promotion 28, no. 5 (2014): 306–309. Use for the controlled relaxation study: 51 participants, randomized crossover design, singing bowl exposure or silence before directed relaxation.Goldsby, Tamara L., Michael E. Goldsby, Mary McWalters, and Paul J. Mills. “Effects of Singing Bowl Sound Meditation on Mood, Tension, and Well-Being: An Observational Study.” Journal of Evidence-Based Complementary & Alternative Medicine 22, no. 3 (2017): 401–406. Use for reductions in tension, anger, fatigue, depressed mood, anxiety, and stress after singing bowl meditation. Good, but frame as observational, not definitive.Rio-Alamos, Cristina, et al. “Acute Relaxation Response Induced by Tibetan Singing Bowl Sounds: A Randomized Controlled Trial.” European Journal of Investigation in Health, Psychology and Education 13, no. 2 (2023): 317–328. Use for Tibetan singing bowl treatment compared with progressive muscle relaxation and a waiting-list control in anxious nonclinical adults.Walter, Nina, et al. “Neurophysiological Effects of a Singing Bowl Massage.” Medicina 58, no. 5 (2022): 594. Use for EEG, ECG, and respiration during singing bowl massage; the authors interpret the results as a shift toward a more mindful or meditative state.Goldsby, Tamara L., et al. “Mood, Emotional, and Spiritual Well-Being Interrelationships.” Religions 13, no. 2 (2022). Useful follow-up for spiritual well-being, emotional interpretation, and how people understand sound-healing experiences.Sound, Anxiety, HRV, and Brainwave CautionMallik, Adiel, and Frank A. Russo. “The Effects of Music & Auditory Beat Stimulation on Anxiety: A Randomized Clinical Trial.” PLOS ONE 17, no. 3 (2022): e0259312. Use this carefully for the broader point that sound-based treatments can reduce somatic and cognitive state anxiety. Do not use it as proof that singing bowls automatically entrain brainwaves.Ingendoh, Ruth Maria, Ella S. Posny, and Angela Heine. “Binaural Beats to Entrain the Brain? A Systematic Review of the Effects of Binaural Beat Stimulation on Brain Oscillatory Activity, and the Implications for Psychological Research and Intervention.” PLOS ONE 18, no. 5 (2023): e0286023. Very useful caution source. Use it when warning against overclaiming “brainwave entrainment” and frequency-healing claims.Vilímek, et al. 2022. Low-frequency sound / HRV / vibroacoustic-related research. Use cautiously if you want to discuss low-frequency vibration, body sensation, and autonomic response. I'd keep this as a secondary source unless you want a dedicated paragraph on vibroacoustics.Physics, Resonance, and CymaticsTerwagne, Denis, and John W. M. Bush. “Tibetan Singing Bowls.” Nonlinearity 24, no. 8 (2011): R51–R66. Use for the physics section: wall vibrations, water-surface waves, Faraday-wave effects, droplet motion, and the visible demonstration of resonance.Jenny, Hans. Cymatics: A Study of Wave Phenomena and Vibration. Newmarket, NH: MACROmedia, 2001. Use carefully for visual sound-pattern history. Good for imagery and occult imagination, but don't overuse it as clinical proof.Rossing, Thomas D. The Science of Sound. 3rd ed. San Francisco: Addison Wesley, 2002. Useful general acoustics source for resonance, overtones, vibration, sound waves, and instrument physics.Sound Baths, Wellness Culture, and Modern RitualSobo, Elisa J. “Sound Baths, Trauma Talk, and the Wellness Paradox in the USA.” Medical Anthropology 43, no. 5 (2024): 367–382. Excellent for the modern sound-bath/wellness-culture angle, especially trauma language, nervous-system talk, ritual performance, and how providers frame sound baths.Sobo, Elisa J. “A Beginner's Guide to Sound Baths — What They Are, How to Choose a Good One and What the Research Shows.” The Conversation (2024). Useful for accessible show-note language and ethical/practical framing.Sobo, Elisa J. “Healing Vibrations.” Anthropology News 64, no. 5 (2023): 28–32, 49. Good anthropology/public-facing source for sound healing and wellness culture.Tibetan Singing Bowls, History, and Cultural CommodificationGrimes, Samuel. “Where Did ‘Tibetan' Singing Bowls Really Come From?” Tricycle (2020). Use for the contested-history section. Strong source for questioning popular origin stories around “Tibetan” singing bowls.Joffe, Ben. “Anthropology and Tibetan Buddhism / Cultural Commodification / Tibetan Mystique.” 2015. Use for the larger argument about how Tibetan/Himalayan aura gets packaged in Western spiritual markets. Good support for the “Tibet as imagined storehouse of hidden wisdom” point.Scheidegger, Daniel A. “Tibetan Ritual Music.” Use for actual Tibetan Buddhist ritual sound: bells, cymbals, long horns, drums, chant, and liturgical soundscape. This helps separate real Tibetan ritual sound from overblown modern singing-bowl mythology.Lopez, Donald S. Prisoners of Shangri-La: Tibetan Buddhism and the West. Chicago: University of Chicago Press, 1998. Excellent support for Western romanticization of Tibet.Bishop, Peter. The Myth of Shangri-La: Tibet, Travel Writing, and the Western Creation of Sacred Landscape. Berkeley: University of California Press, 1989. Very useful for the “Tibet as fantasy geography” angle.Ritual, Sound, and Religious ExperienceEliade, Mircea. Shamanism: Archaic Techniques of Ecstasy. Princeton: Princeton University Press, 1964. Use carefully. Good for altered-state technologies and ritual sound/trance, but don't treat it as the final word on shamanism.Rouget, Gilbert. Music and Trance: A Theory of the Relations Between Music and Possession. Chicago: University of Chicago Press, 1985. Excellent for sound, music, trance, possession, rhythm, and ritual performance.Becker, Judith. Deep Listeners: Music, Emotion, and Trancing. Bloomington: Indiana University Press, 2004. Strong source for deep listening, music, emotion, trance, and the body.Husserl, Edmund. On the Phenomenology of the Consciousness of Internal Time. Useful if you want to get philosophical about tone, decay, waiting, and how sound reveals time.Ihde, Don. Listening and Voice: Phenomenologies of Sound. Albany: SUNY Press, 2007. Good for sound as experience, listening, voice, and embodied perception.Placebo, Meaning Response, and Healing RitualMoerman, Daniel E. Meaning, Medicine and the “Placebo Effect.” Cambridge: Cambridge University Press, 2002. Use for “meaning response” instead of treating placebo as “fake.”Benedetti, Fabrizio. Placebo Effects: Understanding the Mechanisms in Health and Disease. Oxford: Oxford University Press, 2009. Useful for placebo mechanisms, expectation, physiology, and therapeutic context.Kaptchuk, Ted J., and Franklin G. Miller. “Placebo Effects in Medicine.” New England Journal of Medicine 373 (2015): 8–9. Good short medical source for placebo effects as real psychobiological phenomena.Csordas, Thomas J. The Sacred Self: A Cultural Phenomenology of Charismatic Healing. Berkeley: University of California Press, 1994. Useful for healing, embodiment, ritual, and religious experience.Embodied Cognition, Extended Mind, and Ritual ToolsClAlso want to remind people about the website, if you're into reading we have tons of information by multiple contributors, and we got t-shirts up on the site if you're interested. Fun fact, the art is all based on the eyeball. A

Click to Send a Text or Voicemail to MelissaIn this deeply honest conversation about suicide loss and long-term grief, Melissa sits down with Tracy Oeser, MSPsy — suicide loss survivor, grief educator, bereavement coach, and founder of Journey Thru Grief.Nearly 20 years after the suicide loss of her daughter Chelsie, Tracy shares the reality of grieving a child to suicide, what healing actually looks like over time, and how survivors can learn to carry grief while rebuilding life after devastating loss.Together, Melissa and Tracy talk about:• The reality of long-term suicide grief• What changes — and what doesn't — over decades of loss• The emotional phases survivors often experience• Why validation matters so deeply in grief• The difference between surviving and eventually integrating grief into life• Building support spaces rooted in lived experience• The importance of postvention work and honest conversations around suicide loss• Tracy's upcoming Journey Thru Grief Conference and her vision for bringing survivors and professionals together in communityThis episode is a reminder that healing is not linear, grief does not have an expiration date, and no one should have to carry suicide loss alone.About Tracy:Tracy Oeser is the CEO of Postvention Collective, LLC and the CEO and Bereavement Coach of Journey Thru Grief, LLC. She is a passionate advocate for mental health support and by using her breakthrough concept of “The 4 Phases of Suicide Loss,” she fiercely tries to speak for those who have lost family and friends to suicide. Tracy hosts the podcast, “Journey Through Your Suicide Loss” and has been a guest speaker on many different platforms discussing how the suicidal loss of her child affected her. She holds both a BA and MS in Psychology concentrated in life coaching. Tracy is an award-winning author and has received leadership and innovation awards for her work in the postvention field. She serves as a current member of various suicide prevention organizations throughout the United States and is a past board member of the American Association of Suicidology.Connect with Tracy:Tracy's Website: - Journey Thru GriefTracy's Podcast: Journey Through Your Suicide Loss Journey Through Your Suicide Loss | Podcast on SpotifyConference Info: Conference - Journey Thru Grief (Coupon Code: Melissa for $50 off thru June 15, 2026)Social Media: Tracy Oeser (@tracyoeser) • Instagram photos and videosIf this episode resonated with you:Please share it with someone who may need it, leave a review, or simply say your loved one's name today. You are not broken. You are grieving.Disclaimer:This podcast is intended for informational and peer-support purposes only and should not be considered medical or mental health advice.Support the show__________________________________________________________________________

Educational psychologist, researcher and author Dr. Todd Rose has one of the most unusual journeys of any academic. Todd dropped out of high school, became a father at a young age, and went on welfare to support his family.  Recognizing his own distinctive talents changed everything for Todd. He realized that humans are not cookie cutters: we have unique gifts, but that is not the same as individualism. We are fundamentally connected to one another. Todd went on to get a masters and doctorate from Harvard, before co-founding Populace, a thinktank which aims to research and understand individuality so people can live fulfilling lives.   In this conversation, Todd talks about our deep yearning to belong – but also the dangers of assuming we know what the group thinks, and the perils of conforming. He also explains why we're in an epidemic of resentment – and what you can do about it in your own life.  Todd's books: The End of Average: How We Succeed in a World That Values Sameness 2016 Dark Horse: Achieving Success Through the Pursuit of Fulfillment 2018  Collective Illusions: Conformity, Complicity, and the Science of Why We Make Bad Decisions 2022 With & For is a podcast of the Thrive Center, an applied research center that exists to catalyze a movement of human thriving, with and for others through spiritual health. Learn more at thethrivecenter.org. Follow us on Instagram @thrivecenter Follow us on LinkedIn @thethrivecenter Dr. Pamela Ebstyne King hosts With & For, and is the Executive Director of the Thrive Center and the Peter L. Benson Professor of Applied Developmental Science at the School of Psychology & Marriage and Family Therapy at Fuller Seminary. Follow her @drpamking. About With & For Host: Pam King Senior Director and Producer: Jill Westbrook Operations Manager: Lauren Kim Social Media & Graphic Designer: Wren Juergensen Senior Producer: Clare Wiley Executive Producer: Jakob Lewis Produced by Great Feeling Studios Special thanks to the team at Fuller Studio and Fuller Seminary's School of Psychology & Marriage and Family Therapy. The podcast was made possible through the support from the John Templeton Foundation. The opinions expressed in this publication are those of the host and guests, and do not necessarily reflect the views of the John Templeton Foundation.

  Subscribe in a reader Check out my product recommendations for Narcissist Abuse Survivors! – https://www.amazon.com/shop/tracymalone *As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases. Listen to my podcasts anytime by subscribing with your favorite provider! The post The Hidden Dangers of Narcissistic Divorce | With Ksenia Muench appeared first on Narcissist Abuse Support.

Watch Full on Spotify: http://scientificsense.worldScientific Sense ® by Gill Eapen: Prof. Kathryn Paige Harden is Professor of Psychology at the University of Texas at Austin, where she directs the Developmental Behavior Genetics lab and serves as Director of Clinical Training. Her latest book is the Original Sin: On the Genetics of Vice, the Problem of Blame and the Future of Forgiveness

Welcome back to Appearance Matters: The Podcast! To mark Women's Health Month, Ella speaks to Dr Sophie Williams, Assistant Subject Lead for Psychology at University of Derby, and Trainee Health Psychologist, Dr Laura Falconer, UK-based Health Psychologist at Reed Wellbeing, and Dr Melissa Pehlivan, Postdoctoral Research Fellow at the InsideOut Institute, University of Sydney, Australia about their research into the conditions PMOS (formerly PCOS) and endometriosis. They talk about how these conditions affect far more than just the reproductive system, including how they can lead to feeling a lack of control, impact quality of life and a person's relationship with their body. The conversation also covers the renewed NHS Women's Health Strategy, and how its proposed changes aim to improve research and move towards more integrated, holistic care. Finally, they discuss what approaches can help with the psychological impact of PMOS/PCOS and endometriosis, and how health professionals can best support patients by making them feel validated. If you're interested in finding out more about the Appearance Matters Conference, hosted by the Centre for Appearance Research (9th – 11th of June 2026), click here: https://www.uwe.ac.uk/research/centres-and-groups/appearance/news-and-events/am-conference • Renewed NHS Women's Health Strategy: https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/renewed-womens-health-strategy-for-england • Guardian article on PCOS name change: https://www.theguardian.com/society/ng-interactive/2026/may/12/polycystic-ovary-syndrome-pcos-new-name-polyendocrine-metabolic-ovarian-syndrome-pmos Find out more about Laura, Melissa and Sophie's research: • https://www.derby.ac.uk/staff/sophie-williams/ • https://insideoutinstitute.org.au/about-us/team/melissa-pehlivan • https://www.researchgate.net/profile/Laura-Falconer-2 Support with PCOS/PMOS and endometriosis: • Verity PCOS: https://www.verity-pcos.org.uk/ • PCOS AA: https://www.pcosaa.org/ • Endometriosis UK: https://www.endometriosis-uk.org/ • BSGE (British Society for Gynaecological Endoscopy): https://www.bsge.org.uk/ Cover image made using Canva Music by Sian Evans & John Landau: toplinefilm.com Episode developed and produced by Ella Guest

Weed can be relaxing, funny, creative, and social - until it isn’t. In this episode, we look at what weed is actually doing in the brain, why it can calm one person and overwhelm another, and how it can change from something enjoyable into something we start leaning on for out emotional wellbeing. We explore:• What actually happens to our brains when we’re high• What THC and CBD actually are, and how they differ• Why weed can make some people anxious, hungry, or more creative• When weed becomes less about fun and more about coping, avoidance, or escape• How smoking can shape memory, motivation, and everyday connection• The signs your relationship with weed might be changing Watch on Netflix: HERE Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com Our favourite sources: https://hms.harvard.edu/news-events/publications-archive/brain/cannabis-brain https://www.cambridge.org/core/journals/nutrition-research-reviews/article/endocannabinoid-system-and-appetite-relevance-for-food-reward/30C65E719848770761B6BEA7D0C1E9CB https://jamanetwork.com/journals/jamanetworkopen/fullarticle/2829657 https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1002/brb3.71102 The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Birthday games are 3WDs specialty… and it has now begun to grow. New DMs are joining in on the fun and running new, unique, and exciting games in all types of systems and taking on the challenge of one-upping the Wise DMs.In this episode, Tony, Chris, and Dave sit down with returning guests, Bonnie and Elizabeth, to review, unpack, and discuss the steps they took to take a one-off Call of Cthulhu investigation from last year and transform it into a massive 9-player adventure that spanned both Call of Cthulhu and D&D! For anyone that has ever thought of mashing systems and players together… this is the episode for you!2:00 The 3 Wise DMs review the overall experience.3:45 Our Guest DMs, Bonnie and Elizabeth, provide the high overview of approaching a large adventure combining 2 separate systems.9:35 The inciting incident for our current Investigation.16:15 Providing spotlight for all the characters.19:05 The power of narrative-focused TTRPGs.22:38 Time management in one-shots.30:50 Developing a mystery that will allow the players to discover it and NOT blow your clock budget.36:40 Bringing the tables back together for the finale and the “Psychology of the Sheet.”50:05 Final Thoughts.

Why do so many successful investors struggle to actually enjoy the wealth they've built? In this Memorial Day weekend episode of Allworth's Money Matters, Scott and Pat talk with UCLA professor and behavioral expert Hal Hershfield and explore the emotional side of money, retirement, and investing. From fear of running out of money to recency bias and loss aversion, this episode dives deep into the hidden psychological forces that shape financial decisions — even for millionaires. If you've ever wondered why investors panic during market drops, hesitate to spend in retirement, or obsess over past financial mistakes, this conversation about investing will completely change how you think about money. Scott, Pat, and Hal unpack why wealthy retirees often struggle to spend confidently, how emotions influence investing decisions, and why understanding investor psychology may be just as important as understanding the stock market itself. They also discuss longevity insurance, risk tolerance, mental accounting, and how advisors can help clients align money with purpose and happiness. Whether you're approaching retirement or simply want to become a smarter long-term investor, this episode offers powerful insights into the psychology behind successful investing and financial decision-making. What You'll Learn: -Why many wealthy retirees are afraid to spend money -How loss aversion impacts investing decisions -The dangers of recency bias in the stock market -Why financial regrets stick with us longer than successes -How psychology shapes investing behavior -The emotional side of risk tolerance and market volatility -How “mental accounting” affects spending habits -Why longevity insurance hasn't caught on with investors -How financial advisors help clients align money with life goals Join Money Matters:  Get your most pressing financial questions answered by Allworth's co-founders Scott Hanson and Pat McClain. Call 833-99-WORTH. Or ask a question by clicking here.  You can also be on the air by emailing Scott and Pat at questions@moneymatters.com. Download and rate our podcast here.  

Two threads of the Murdaugh case worth pulling on — what was already in motion before June 7, 2021, and what the prosecution may not get to use at a second trial.Maggie Murdaugh had reportedly retained a divorce attorney. She was living apart from Alex. June 7 was a day she did not want to spend at Moselle, and two witnesses testified to exactly that. She went anyway. Psychotherapist Shavaun Scott — who writes about separation danger on her Substack, Spotlight on Psychology — walks through the behavioral mechanics. What shifts inside a controlling partner who senses he's losing his grip. Why compliance becomes automatic after years of keeping the peace. What someone in that window needs to recognize before it's too late.On the legal track, the South Carolina Supreme Court ruled the prosecution overreached at the original trial. Twelve and a half hours on financial crimes testimony was deemed excessive, and any retrial must be significantly trimmed. Defense attorney and former prosecutor Eric Faddis maps the evidentiary terrain. The court specifically flagged testimony about individual theft victims as having no probative value on motive — emotionally damaging to Alex Murdaugh, legally irrelevant. What survives is the narrow exposure window: the firm's CFO allegedly confronting Murdaugh about missing fees the morning of the killings, and an opposing attorney's hearing scheduled three days later that would have forced financial disclosure.Faddis also examines the open evidentiary questions the court left unsettled — the firearm analysis, the blue raincoat, the gunshot residue testimony, and the iPhone demonstration — and identifies which one gives the defense its strongest opening. Plus the strategic decision the defense has to make before anything else.FOOTER LINKSJoin Our SubStack For AD-FREE ADVANCE EPISODES & EXTRAS!: https://hiddenkillers.substack.com/Want to comment and watch this podcast as a video? Check out our YouTube Channel. https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC8-vxmbhTxxG10sO1izODJg?sub_confirmation=1Instagram https://www.instagram.com/hiddenkillerspod/Facebook https://www.facebook.com/hiddenkillerspod/Tik-Tok https://www.tiktok.com/@hiddenkillerspodX Twitter https://x.com/TrueCrimePodDISCLAIMERThis publication contains commentary and opinion based on publicly available information. All individuals are presumed innocent until proven guilty in a court of law. Nothing published here should be taken as a statement of fact, health or legal advice.HASHTAGS#AlexMurdaugh #MaggieMurdaugh #MurdaughTrial #MurdaughRetrial #SCSupremeCourt #EricFaddis #ShavaunScott #Moselle #HiddenKillers #TrueCrime

If you enjoy this episode, we're sure you will enjoy more content like this on The Occult Rejects.  In fact, we have curated playlists on occult topics like grimoires, esoteric concepts and phenomena, occult history, analyzing true crime and cults with an occult lens, Para politics, and occultism in music. Whether you enjoy consuming your content visually or via audio, we've got you covered - and it will always be provided free of charge.  So, if you enjoy what we do and want to support our work of providing accessible, free content on various platforms, please consider making a donation to the links provided below.  Thank you and enjoy the episode!Links For The Occult Rejectshttps://linktr.ee/theoccultrejectsOccult Research Institutehttps://www.occultresearchinstitute.org/Substackhttps://substack.com/@theoccultrejects?r=7auau0&utm_campaign=profile&utm_medium=profile-pageCash Apphttps://cash.app/$theoccultrejectsVenmo@TheOccultRejectsBuy Me A Coffeebuymeacoffee.com/TheOccultRejectsPatreonhttps://www.patreon.com/TheOccultRejectsEPISODE 1 BIBLIOGRAPHYThe Building That Changes YouAckerman, Joshua M., Christopher C. Nocera, and John A. Bargh. “Incidental Haptic Sensations Influence Social Judgments and Decisions.” Science 328, no. 5986 (2010): 1712–1715. Key use: Haptics, touch, weight, texture, hardness, and the idea that physical sensation can influence judgment and social interpretation. This supports the tactile layer of the episode: heavy doors, cold stone, worn rails, kneelers, relic cases, and sacred matter as meaningful contact.Higuera-Trujillo, Juan Luis, Carmen Llinares, and Eduardo Macagno. “The Cognitive-Emotional Design and Study of Architectural Space: A Scoping Review of Neuroarchitecture and Its Precursor Approaches.” Sensors 21, no. 6 (2021): 2193. Key use: Neuroarchitecture, emotional response to built environments, and the idea that architecture can be studied as a cognitive-emotional stimulus rather than only as art or style.Kilde, Jeanne Halgren. Sacred Power, Sacred Space: An Introduction to Christian Architecture and Worship. Oxford University Press, 2008. Key use: Major backbone source for Christian architecture as a system of worship, power, spatial order, and embodied religious experience. Oxford's description emphasizes Kilde's argument that church buildings represent and reify different forms of power, especially divine power.Morgan, David. The Sacred Gaze: Religious Visual Culture in Theory and Practice. University of California Press, 2005. Key use: Religious seeing, visual culture, sacred images, and the idea that vision is an active religious practice that can invest images, persons, times, and places with spiritual meaning.Taves, Ann. Religious Experience Reconsidered: A Building-Block Approach to the Study of Religion and Other Special Things. Princeton University Press, 2009. Key use: Helps frame religious experience without reducing it to one fixed category. Useful for the episode's approach to how experiences become interpreted, named, and treated as religious or sacred.Clark, Andy. Surfing Uncertainty: Prediction, Action, and the Embodied Mind. Oxford University Press, 2016. Key use: Predictive processing, active inference, and the idea that perception is not passive recording but active prediction and model-building. This supports the “brain does not enter a church like a camera” argument.Krueger, Joel. “Extended Mind and Religious Cognition.” 2016. Key use: Extended and embodied cognition applied to religious practice, ritual objects, and environments. Useful for arguing that worship is not only inside the head but supported by bodies, tools, spaces, and shared action.Oxford Academic. “Embodied Cognition in Ecclesial Practices.” In Oxford Studies in Analytic Theology, 2023. Key use: Christian practices, embodied cognition, Eucharistic action, and religious material culture as cognitively significant rather than merely symbolic.Piff, Paul K., Pia Dietze, Matthew Feinberg, Daniel M. Stancato, and Dacher Keltner. “Awe, the Small Self, and Prosocial Behavior.” Journal of Personality and Social Psychology 108, no. 6 (2015): 883–899. Key use: Awe, vastness, the “small self,” and the psychological effects of encountering something perceived as larger than the ordinary self. This supports the cathedral-scale and sacred-vastness argument.Tarr, Bronwyn, Jacques Launay, and Robin I. M. Dunbar. “Music and Social Bonding: ‘Self-Other' Merging and Neurohormonal Mechanisms.” Frontiers in Psychology 5 (2014): 1096. Key use: Music, synchrony, social bonding, rhythmic action, and group cohesion. This supports the sections on chant, group singing, ritual synchrony, and bodies acting together in sacred space.Ittyerah, Miriam. “Memory for Curvature of Objects: Haptic Touch vs. Vision.” 2007. Key use: Haptic memory, touch-based object recognition, and the idea that touch can produce durable memory traces. Useful for worn rails, thresholds, beads, icons, relic cases, and repeated sacred contact.Lange, Lisa S., et al. “Tactile Memory Impairments in Younger and Older Adults.” Scientific Reports, 2024. Key use: Modern tactile-memory framing; useful for the claim that tactile experience is remembered and retrieved as part of embodied life.Freedberg, David. The Power of Images: Studies in the History and Theory of Response. University of Chicago Press, 1989. Key use: Image response, embodied reaction to sacred or charged images, and why religious images can provoke devotion, fear, destruction, reverence, or bodily response.Plate, S. Brent. A History of Religion in 5½ Objects: Bringing the Spiritual to Its Senses. Beacon Press, 2014. Key use: Material religion, objects, sensory experience, and the idea that religion is encountered through things, not only beliefs.Meyer, Birgit. Mediation and the Genesis of Presence: Toward a Material Approach to Religion. Key use: Material religion, mediation, presence, and how religious traditions use media, objects, images, sounds, and spaces to make the sacred present.Pallasmaa, Juhani. The Eyes of the Skin: Architecture and the Senses. Key use: Architecture as a multisensory experience, especially touch, materiality, atmosphere, and the limits of treating architecture as only visual.Mallgrave, Harry Francis. The Architect's Brain: Neuroscience, Creativity, and Architecture. Wiley-Blackwell, 2010. Key use: Architecture and neuroscience, built form, emotion, perception, and embodied response to space.Robinson, Sarah, and Juhani Pallasmaa, eds. Mind in Architecture: Neuroscience, Embodiment, and the Future of Design. MIT Press, 2015. Key use: Embodiment, neuroscience, architectural perception, and how built environments shape lived experience.Eliade, Mircea. The Sacred and the Profane: The Nature of Religion. Key use: Sacred space, threshold, center, axis mundi, and the distinction between ordinary space and holy space. This becomes more important in Episode 2, but it also supports Episode 1's general sacred-space framework.van Gennep, Arnold. The Rites of Passage. Key use: Separation, threshold, and incorporation. Useful for the threshold logic that runs through the whole series.Turner, Victor. The Ritual Process: Structure and Anti-Structure. Key use: Liminality, transition, communitas, and the ritual power of in-between states.Tuan, Yi-Fu. Space and Place: The Perspective of Experience. Key use: Lived place, memory, experience, and the difference between abstract space and meaningful place.Smith, Jonathan Z. To Take Place: Toward Theory in Ritual. Key use: Ritual as place-making; sacred places are produced through repeated action, interpretation, and return.Morgan, David. Visual Piety: A History and Theory of Popular Religious Images. Key use: Popular religious images, devotional seeing, sacred practice, and how visual material becomes part of lived religion.Kieckhefer, Richard. Theology in Stone: Church Architecture from Byzantium to Berkeley. Key use: Church architecture as theology in built form, useful as a broad Christian architectural bridge source.Also want to remind people about the website, if you're into reading we have tons of information by multiple contributors, and we got t-shirts up on the site if you're interested. Fun fact, the art is all based on the eyeball. A

Two conversations about Alex Murdaugh, and both of them keep coming back to what Maggie was carrying in those final months.She had reportedly retained a divorce attorney. She was living apart from Alex. On June 7, 2021, she did not want to go to Moselle. Two witnesses testified to that. She went anyway. Psychotherapist Shavaun Scott — who writes about separation danger on her Substack, Spotlight on Psychology — explains what happens inside a controlling partner when they sense the door is closing. Why instincts get overridden after years of keeping the peace. Why the window between deciding to leave and actually being gone is the most dangerous stretch in a relationship like that. The way Scott describes those final hours, you cannot unhear it.Then the legal track. Defense attorney and former prosecutor Eric Faddis breaks down what the South Carolina Supreme Court ruling means for a potential retrial. The court found the prosecution spent too much time on Alex Murdaugh's financial crimes — twelve and a half hours of it — and a second trial will have to be cut down significantly. The parade of theft victims that helped paint him to the first jury? Probably gone. What survives is tighter and colder: the CFO allegedly confronting him about missing fees the morning of the killings, and an opposing attorney's hearing three days later that would have forced him to open the books.Faddis also walks through the evidence the court left unresolved — the firearm analysis, the blue raincoat, the gunshot residue, the iPhone demonstration — and which one gives the defense its strongest opening. Plus the call the defense has to make before anything else.FOOTER LINKSJoin Our SubStack For AD-FREE ADVANCE EPISODES & EXTRAS!: https://hiddenkillers.substack.com/Want to comment and watch this podcast as a video? Check out our YouTube Channel. https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC8-vxmbhTxxG10sO1izODJg?sub_confirmation=1Instagram https://www.instagram.com/hiddenkillerspod/Facebook https://www.facebook.com/hiddenkillerspod/Tik-Tok https://www.tiktok.com/@hiddenkillerspodX Twitter https://x.com/TrueCrimePodDISCLAIMERThis publication contains commentary and opinion based on publicly available information. All individuals are presumed innocent until proven guilty in a court of law. Nothing published here should be taken as a statement of fact, health or legal advice.HASHTAGS#AlexMurdaugh #MaggieMurdaugh #MurdaughTrial #MurdaughRetrial #SCSupremeCourt #EricFaddis #ShavaunScott #Moselle #HiddenKillers #TrueCrime

Looking back at the Murdaugh case through the behavioral lens, because two separate conversations keep circling back to the same question — what was actually happening inside that family before June 7, 2021?Maggie Murdaugh had reportedly consulted a divorce attorney and was living apart from Alex. On the day of the killings, two witnesses testified she did not want to go to Moselle. She went anyway. Psychotherapist Shavaun Scott unpacks the psychology of the separation window — the period between deciding to leave and actually being gone — and explains why that stretch is when the danger spikes, when control turns desperate, and when compliance can override survival instincts after years of keeping the peace. Scott writes about this dynamic on her Substack, Spotlight on Psychology, and the final question in that conversation could matter to someone listening right now.The second thread runs through the courtroom. Defense attorney and former prosecutor Eric Faddis breaks down the South Carolina Supreme Court's ruling that the prosecution spent twelve and a half hours on Alex Murdaugh's financial crimes at the original trial — and any retrial has to cut that down significantly. The behavioral question buried inside the legal one is this: what was the actual motive theory the State built, and does it hold up without the emotional pile-on? Faddis walks through what survives — the CFO allegedly confronting Murdaugh about missing fees the morning of the killings, the opposing attorney's hearing three days later — and what gets stripped out.He also addresses the evidence the court left unresolved — the firearm analysis, the blue raincoat, the gunshot residue, the iPhone demonstration — and identifies the defense's strongest opening if a retrial happens.FOOTER LINKSJoin Our SubStack For AD-FREE ADVANCE EPISODES & EXTRAS!: https://hiddenkillers.substack.com/Want to comment and watch this podcast as a video? Check out our YouTube Channel. https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC8-vxmbhTxxG10sO1izODJg?sub_confirmation=1Instagram https://www.instagram.com/hiddenkillerspod/Facebook https://www.facebook.com/hiddenkillerspod/Tik-Tok https://www.tiktok.com/@hiddenkillerspodX Twitter https://x.com/TrueCrimePodDISCLAIMERThis publication contains commentary and opinion based on publicly available information. All individuals are presumed innocent until proven guilty in a court of law. Nothing published here should be taken as a statement of fact, health or legal advice.HASHTAGS#AlexMurdaugh #MaggieMurdaugh #MurdaughTrial #MurdaughRetrial #SCSupremeCourt #EricFaddis #ShavaunScott #Moselle #HiddenKillers #TrueCrime

Becca Lory Hector, an autistic self-advocate, has the lived experience of moving through different environments that afford different access to nature, and natural activities. She, Barry, and Dave discuss the benefits of immersion in nature and nature activities and contrast those benefits with the challenges of limited access. They also discuss the importance of awareness and modifying life routines with sensitivity to seasonal changes.Learn more on our websiteSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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You can listen wherever you get your podcasts or check out the fully edited transcript of our interview at the bottom of this post.In this episode of The Peaceful Parenting Podcast, my guest is Dr. Justin Coulson, an Australian parenting expert and father of 6 who has his PhD in psychology and is the author of 10 books on parenting and the co-host of the Happy Families podcast with his wife, Kylie. We discuss the psychology behind peaceful parenting, including how self-determination theory explains kids' challenging behavior. Dr. Justin also shared his three E's of discipline.Know someone who might appreciate this episode? Share it with them!And if you love the podcast, FREE ways to help us out:1- Rate and review the podcast in your podcast player app2- “Like” this post by tapping the heart icon ♥️3- Share this with a friend. THANK YOU!We talk about:* 1:45 – Introduction to Dr. Justin Coulson and his personal parenting turning pointHow struggles with anger and discipline led him to rethink everything and study psychology.* 08:20 – Learning to regulate ourselves, practicing repair, and growing over time.* 15:50 – Why peaceful parenting starts with the parent's self-awareness and regulation.* 19:50 – Understanding behavior through compassion and curiosity.* 20:50 – The HALTS frameworkHow hunger, anger, loneliness, tiredness, and stress impact children's behavior.* 23:00 – Self-determination theory and parenting* 33:00 – The 3 E's of Effective Discipline* 41:50 – How to use the 3 E's in everyday parenting moments.Real-life examples: screens, sibling conflict & collaboration* 49:00 – Building trust and the “goodwill bank” with kidsWhy collaborative parenting pays off when tough limits are needed.* 53:30 – Advice to his younger parenting self: “soft eyes”A powerful reflection on kindness, connection, and showing up with compassion.* 56:30 – Where to find Dr. Justin CoulsonHis podcast, books, and upcoming work on boys and healthy masculinity.Resources mentioned in this episode:* Dr. Justin's website and podcast* Yoto Screen Free Audio Book Player* The Peaceful Parenting Membership* Evelyn & Bobbie brasConnect with Sarah Rosensweet:* Instagram* Facebook Group* YouTube* Website* Join us on Substack* Newsletter* Book a short consult or coaching session callxx Sarah and CoreyYour peaceful parenting team- click here for a free short consult or a coaching sessionVisit our website for free resources, podcast, coaching, membership and more!>> Please support us!!! Please consider becoming a supporter to help support our free content, including The Peaceful Parenting Podcast, our free parenting support Facebook group, and our weekly parenting emails, “Weekend Reflections” and “Weekend Support” - plus our Flourish With Your Complex Child Summit (coming back in the summer for the 3rd year!) All of this free support for you takes a lot of time and energy from me and my team. If it has been helpful or meaningful for you, your support would help us to continue to provide support for free, for you and for others.In addition to knowing you are supporting our mission to support parents and children, you get the podcast ad free and access to a monthly ‘ask me anything' session.Our sponsors:YOTO: YOTO is a screen free audio book player that lets your kids listen to audiobooks, music, podcasts and more without screens, and without being connected to the internet. No one listening or watching and they can't go where you don't want them to go and they aren't watching screens. BUT they are being entertained or kept company with audio that you can buy from YOTO or create yourself on one of their blank cards. Check them out HEREEvelyn & Bobbie bras: If underwires make you want to rip your bra off by noon, Evelyn & Bobbie is for you. These bras are wire-free, ultra-soft, and seriously supportive—designed to hold you comfortably all day without pinching, poking, or constant adjusting. Check them out HERESarah: Hey, everyone. Welcome back to another episode of the Peaceful Parenting Podcast. Today's guest is Dr. Justin Coulson. He's an Australian parenting expert with a PhD in psychology, the author of 10 books on parenting, the co-host of the Happy Families podcast with his wife, Kylie, the father of six children, and, last but not least, grandfather of one.We discuss the psychology behind peaceful parenting, including how self-determination theory explains kids' challenging behavior. Dr. Justin also shared his three E's of discipline, which I just loved.If you like this episode, please share it with a friend so more parents can learn about peaceful parenting. If you're a fan of the podcast, you can help us out not only by sharing it, but by leaving a review and a five-star rating in your podcast player app. While you're there, don't forget to follow the show so you don't miss an episode.If you'd like to support us even more, you can become a supporter on Substack to help us offset the cost of making the show. We'll put a link in the show notes.Let's meet Dr. Justin. I hope you enjoy this conversation and get as much out of his insights as I did.Sarah: Hello, Dr. Justin, and welcome to the podcast.Dr. Justin: Sarah, I'm so glad to be with you. Thanks for having me on.Sarah: Yeah, and it's morning for you, evening for me—nice—and I'm just glad that we could make this time to talk to each other. I really appreciate it. Thank you. So, could you just tell us a little bit about who you are and what you do?Dr. Justin: Sure. I grew up on the east coast of Australia, about an hour north of Sydney. Geographically, that kind of locates where I was. I was the teenage boy that every parent hopes they will not have. I don't think I was a particularly bad kid, but I certainly wasn't a good kid.My parents were spending a small fortune—I'm a 1975 baby, I turned 50 last year—but this was in the late '80s and early '90s. My parents were spending so much money to send me to a private school. Because we were on the coast—a very quintessentially Australian thing—I was wagging school.Do you say “wagging school” in Canada? Is that a term Canadians use?Sarah: No, but I think we get the context. I think it means not going to school.Dr. Justin: Yeah, I was truant. They thought I was there, but I wasn't.Sarah: We say skipping.Dr. Justin: I was skipping school. Okay, yeah. We call it a school wag.So I would go to school in the morning and get my name marked off in roll call. Then I would sneak out of the school. Across the road from the school, there were bushes—kind of a forest, or whatever you might call it in Canada and America. I would get changed out of my tie, long pants, and black school shoes, throw on some board shorts and a T-shirt.My surfboard was stashed in the bush, and I'd grab it from the hiding place. Then I'd jump on a bus, go to the beach, and surf all day. Afterward, I'd get a bus back to school in the afternoon, change back into my uniform, and race into the school just in time to get my name marked off, looking like I'd been at school all day.This was in the days before schools communicated with parents via email and text, because none of that existed. I was able to get away with it.So I finished high school. I scored in the bottom 15%—Sarah: Goodness.Dr. Justin: Not just my class, but of the entire state of New South Wales. My parents were devastated.I didn't care. I wanted to have a media career. I wanted to be a radio announcer. So I got into radio. If you've ever listened to the radio—and no offense to radio people—you know you don't have to do well at school to be good at radio. You just have to be able to sit on the microphone and say things that make sense.I knew I could do that, so school didn't matter to me. I didn't care about it. That's what I did.But this is where it intersects with parenting.About 10 years into my radio career, my wife and I were having some challenges, particularly around my parenting. We had a threenager and a newborn baby.That three-year-old—I had always held the opinion that my children would do as they were told, and if they didn't, I would make sure they understood that I was the father and that their job was to do as I said.So I was very punitive. I basically made all of the parenting mistakes you can imagine when I would get angry, frustrated, and ill-tempered. It's not that I was a bad father—I spent a lot of high-quality time loving my kids—but I was also really short-fused and highly aggressive.Frankly, I went from threatening to hitting really fast. You call it spanking; we would call it smacking. I was very, very quick to smack or spank my three-year-old, and it wasn't working.After one particularly bad incident where things escalated, I really did lose control. I didn't just spank her once. There were multiple spankings. This was like a 10-minute escalation session where it just got worse and worse and worse.My wife was out at the time. When she came home, I said to Kylie, “I'm a bad father. I'm not doing this well. I'm making a lot of mistakes, and here's what happened while you were out.”Full confession: Kylie has always been this wonderfully supportive wife—very kind, gentle, compassionate, soft-spoken, thoughtful, considerate, empathic—all of those beautiful attributes that I prize and treasure in my good wife.She was none of those things that day.She had fire in her eyes and said, “You are not living up to the father that I hoped you would be, and you're also not living up to the husband I need you to be.”And it took me back, because I was already feeling downcast. I felt like I was failing anyway, and she just—it was like she picked up a great big lump of wood and whacked me over the head with it and said, “No.”Of course, she didn't actually do that, but that's how it felt. It felt physical. Visceral. Like, Ow. This is serious.I left my radio career shortly thereafter.I was working at one of the biggest radio stations in Australia at the time, and I gave up all the backstage passes with global superstars and hanging out with record company executives at the best restaurants, eating their food so they could bribe me to play their music on the radio station. I went back to school.I became a full-time student. I worked part-time at three different jobs while studying full-time. I'd sleep under the desk at university so I could do the study and the work—Sarah: No surfing this time?Dr. Justin: No surfing this time, no. I was just so committed to it.After eight and a half years of full-time study, I graduated with a doctorate. I had to do a couple of other qualifications first, including a psychological science degree. I graduated with a doctorate in psychology and became a university lecturer.Along the way, Sarah, we went from having our two kids at that point to having our third child in my first year of study, our fourth child in my fifth year of study, and our fifth child while I was doing my doctorate. Shortly after I left the university setting, stopped lecturing, and started writing books and giving talks, we had our sixth child.So we're the parents—Sarah: Amazing.Dr. Justin: —of six daughters. Today, they range in age from 12—the youngest—to the oldest, who is in her mid-to-late 20s. She and her husband have a baby now. They've been married for a few years.Sarah: Wow. You're a grandpa.Dr. Justin: A grand—I'm a grandpa. We have a two-and-a-half-year-old grandbaby, four adult children, one in her teens, and a 12-year-old.So that's kind of my very short version of the journey.Along the way, I've written a bunch of books. We've got a TV show in Australia called Parental Guidance. We've had three seasons of that show on primetime TV. I've got a website and all the things that you'd expect—a podcast and so on.Sarah: What did you do when you had that aha moment—that realization that you weren't being the kind of dad you wanted to be, and your wife also agreed that you weren't being the kind of dad she wanted you to be? What did you change?Because you just mentioned that you spent eight and a half years going back to school. I imagine that you made some changes before you had six kids. So what did you do right away, maybe for anyone listening who can relate to those feelings of rage and feeling triggered by your child?Dr. Justin: Sarah, the first thing I'd say is that there was no linear change, and there were no immediate changes, because I didn't know what to do.I was unskilled. I was uneducated. I didn't know anything about psychology, and I clearly didn't know anything about parenting.But I found a mentor. I have a faith background, and there was a writer who wrote eloquently and compassionately. I just felt like he understood me, and he became a mentor to me.I also discovered a guy called Alfie Kohn. You might be familiar with Alfie Kohn.Sarah: Oh, Alfie Kohn was the first thing I ever read about parenting—Dr. Justin: Oh, great.Sarah: —before I even had kids. And he was on the podcast last year, which felt like a full-circle moment between how influential—I told him on the podcast, “You have probably had the biggest influence on me—not only in my parenting, but in my life's direction—of any single person out there.”So, sorry, fan-girl moment. I'm right there with you with Alfie Kohn.Dr. Justin: Yeah. I've gotten to know Alfie over the years as my academic career advanced and I began to understand where he took his research from.I read his book Punished by Rewards—I think it was a 1993—Sarah: That was my first one too.Dr. Justin: Yeah, it's a 1993 publication or something.Sarah, it was just so influential.What happened was, I was doing my university degree and learning things, and honestly, I'd be sitting there thinking, Hang on, the things they're teaching me in these university courses seem to clash with what Alfie Kohn taught me in Punished by Rewards.So I spent a lot of time in the notes section at the back—you know, all the references nobody ever reads?Sarah: Mm-hmm.Dr. Justin: As I went through them, I discovered researchers named Edward Deci and Richard Ryan from the University of Rochester in upstate New York.They had developed a theory known as self-determination theory.A large portion of Alfie Kohn's work is based on self-determination theory.So I really dug deep into that. I still love Alfie, but I moved very much into the academic side because I became a university lecturer and really got into the nitty-gritty of understanding the deepest depths of what self-determination theory is all about. That has become the foundation of the work that I do.And to your question: nothing is linear when you are trying to make improvements.Whether you're trying to change your diet, exercise, get your finances in order, or improve your relationships, you have insights. You have moments where you think, Oh my goodness, this is what I need to do. I need to show up with warmth on my face and soft eyes.And then three hours later, one of your children does something, and you forget what soft eyes look and feel like. You look at them with hard eyes, frustration in your voice, and short, clipped sentences.Then half an hour later, you think, Oh, self-awareness. I missed that.So it's this gradual process: two steps forward, one step back. Three steps forward, one step back. Four steps forward, three steps back. Eight steps forward, no steps back.Over the years, I had this beautiful experience—and maybe you've had a similar experience in your family as you've raised your kids.We were maybe in my third or fourth year of study. My wife has an early childhood background. She knows child development. She knows what kids need.She was a little skeptical about a lot of the things I was starting to talk about and discover as I went through university and got into the depths of what the research meant—comparing and contrasting it with what was mainstream, but actually not always quite right.We had some tension around how we should respond to the children. I was moving away from that authoritarian bent and developing ideas around exploring their world more.One night, I came home from university a little late. It was probably around 9:00 p.m. Our three children were still awake.As I drove into the driveway, all the lights in the house were on. The windows were open. Looking through the living room window, I could tell the house was—to put it politely—a mess.And as I stepped into the house, the kids—it was just awful.I walked over to Kylie and said, “Honey, it looks like it's been a pretty tough day.”I was trying to be compassionate and empathic. I was really trying to do what psychology says is the right thing to do.Kylie looked at me without hesitation and said, “Don't give me any of that psychology crap. I've had the worst day in the world.”Then she stormed out and said, “You fix it,” and walked into the bedroom and closed the door.Again, this is not how my wife usually is, but it had been a really rough day. The kids were feral. The house was a mess.I looked at my priorities. I sat down with the child who was struggling the most and worked with her for two or three minutes. She calmed down, I gave her a little food, and put her to bed.Within about 20 minutes, I had all three kids in bed, and I was so proud of myself.I stepped into the kitchen and started tidying up. I thought, I'll just give Kylie some space.After another 30 or 40 minutes of tidying, I stepped into the living room and said, “Honey, I know you're really upset. It's been a pretty tough day. I wasn't trying to be judgy or anything.”And she said, “It's fine for you. You're not dealing with it all day. You walk in and think you can just snap your fingers and everything's fine.”Then she looked at me and said, “But tonight, you walked in and it feels like you snapped your fingers and everything's fine.”And we had this beautiful conversation where she said, “I've been resenting the things you've been trying to tell me because it felt like you were telling me I was wrong.“But I've been watching, and I'm actually seeing that the things you're doing are working, and our family is feeling better.”It took four or five years to get there, Sarah.It's not like I had this epiphany—I'm a bad father, I need to change—and suddenly I was a good dad.There were many embarrassing, shameful moments after that epiphany where I still made terrible decisions and treated the children badly.Even today, I still lose my temper, say things I shouldn't, and get frustrated, because kids are kids and we're fallible humans.But we call parenting parenting because it's about us. If it were about children, we'd call it childrening.Which sounds silly, right?Dr. Justin: But what I've really discovered is that if I can learn how to regulate myself—high emotions equal low intelligence—then I can regulate my emotions, turn them up or down appropriately for the context, and keep them in harmony with my long-term goals, which are to have loving, kind relationships with my children.If I can do that, I'm going to approach them with a tremendously different focus than I will if I'm looking for a short-term fix.And that is something—Anger is a habit. Yelling is a habit. Time-out is a habit. Reward charts are a habit.We can create other habits. We just have to understand the processes and principles behind those habits and then practice them, like we practice a song on the piano, until we finally get it right.Sarah: I love that.So you and Kylie really had a journey—a back-and-forth dance of your own processes and your own development.I do love how you say it's really about us. Whenever I'm working with clients, after a couple of sessions they'll say, “You know what? This isn't even about my kid. This is just about me.”Dr. Justin: Yes. Yes.Sarah: Nobody wants to believe that at first, because it's so much easier to think, I've just got to change them and what they're doing.But it's really all about what we're bringing to the moment and what we're bringing to the relationship.Dr. Justin: I get in trouble sometimes for being overly provocative and saying things that are insensitive, so a quick warning:I want to say what I'm about to say with all the compassion in the world and all the tenderness and care in the world, because I work with people every single day who are dealing with exactly the struggles you're talking about.I want to step into the world of neurodiversity—ADHD, autism, trauma—those kinds of areas.What we're talking about applies there as well. It's just harder.Sarah: Mm-hmm.Dr. Justin: But ultimately, if I'm raising an ADHD child or a child who's been through a traumatic experience, once again, parenting is not about them. It's about how I show up for them.So I can say, “Well, my child's like that,” or, “I'm like this because of the diagnosis,” or because of the label, or because of the trauma, or because of the neural networks doing what they're doing.I can say all of those things, and many people do. It's understandable, and I have all the compassion in the world for them when they do.But the key thing I want to highlight is that in spite of all of those challenges your child might be facing—or even that you might be facing—today begins now.It begins with what you put on your face and what you think in your mind.If we can soften our features and go to our children with kindness and compassion while still holding appropriate limits—or working with them to develop appropriate limits—then what we can say is:“Yes, that bad thing happened,” or, “Yes, we are dealing with this difficulty, so what are we going to do about it?”We can fall into the I can't do anything way of thinking, which is really ineffective and doesn't help at all.Or we can step into I have this incredible thing psychologists call agency, or self-efficacy, where I can make a decision now, and if we work on it, we can actually improve things.It might be a longer, harder road. There may be more obstacles to climb over than a typical family without those challenging circumstances.It may be harder.But we can always improve.I never want to be the person who puts limits on what kids can do or what parents can do.If we change our language, change our focus, and recognize that this is a long game—Sarah: Mm-hmm.Dr. Justin: —which requires sustained effort every single day, it's extraordinary the progress we can make and the changes we can create in our home and our family.Sarah: For sure. Yeah.And unfortunately, it's a long game, right? Because I think today we always want quick answers and solutions.Really, it's just showing up every day as best you can and repairing when you don't show up the way you wish you had.And I think another really important part of it—which you were talking around a little bit—is trying to understand our child's experience and see things from their perspective.I was just talking to a client about that today:What's the most emotionally generous explanation you can come up with for their behavior?Because we don't actually know why anyone does anything, since we're not in their brain.But we often jump to, They're being rude on purpose, or They're trying to annoy me.Really, if we can think, Well, I don't know why they're doing this, but there's probably a reason, because kids want to be good. They want to be connected with us.And just reminding ourselves that they're not giving us a hard time—they're having a hard time.That actually makes it easier, I think, to show up as your best, most compassionate self—with, as you say, soft eyes and warm features.Dr. Justin: Yeah.No child wakes up in the morning thinking, Today's the day. I'm just going to ruin everything.This is the perfect opportunity. My parents are tired and frazzled. There's a cost-of-living crisis. There are all these challenges happening, and if ever there was a moment—it's now. I'm going to do it today.They don't wake up thinking that.Like you said—and you said it so perfectly—kids really do want to please us.I know some parents listening to me say that right now are thinking, No, no. My child does not want to please me.And so the question becomes: Why? Why are they struggling?And maybe this is a nice way for me to bring in some of the principles I learned as I went deeper into self-determination theory.There are a couple of times when children are almost guaranteed to be challenging, and this has nothing to do with self-determination theory. This is just general psychology and wellbeing.I always think of Germany. A police officer tells you to stop, but they don't say the word stop because they're German.In German, the word for stop is halt—H-A-L-T.So we add an S to the end, and the acronym becomes:Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired, or Stressed.Sarah: Mm-hmm.Dr. Justin: Those are the five times when you can all but guarantee your children are not going to be doing well.If they are hungry, get some food into them—ideally a little protein, because it's satiating and helps them feel full quickly.If they're angry, then we've got to remember: high emotions equal low intelligence.You can't think straight in a high emotional state.So our job is to get curious, not furious, because if we fight fire with fire, we end up with a scorched-earth policy and everything gets burned.Dr. Justin: Lonely.I could be sitting right next to you, Sarah, and feel disconnected and lonely—Sarah: Mm-hmm.Dr. Justin: —even if we were very close.Our children are sometimes literally sitting at our kitchen bench, and they feel alone. They feel a little lost. Because of the way we're responding to them—with hard commands, correction, and direction rather than connection—they feel lonely.Tired.I don't even need to explain that.Even as adults, I don't know any couple who, at the end of witching hour—or whatever you might call it in North America, that 5:00 to 7:00 p.m. stretch when the kids—Sarah: Yeah.Dr. Justin: —are just oof…It's the end of that period, and you're exhausted, the kids are exhausted, and you look at your husband or wife and say, “You know what? We are so tired. We're shattered. But boy, are we nailing it tonight.”Nobody ever says that when they're tired—Sarah: Yeah.Dr. Justin: —because you're not nailing it. You're just hanging in there.And it's the same with kids.Then the S is for stressed, and that includes sickness, because sickness is a stress on the body as well.Those five indicators are going to let you know when your child is likely to be challenging, and I think they're really good to watch out for.But if we go a little deeper and talk about self-determination theory, it says that each of us has these needs.You have them, Sarah, and I have them, and our children have them—even your mother-in-law has them.We have three basic psychological needs.When we're in environments where those needs are supported, oh my goodness, we thrive. These are environments we're drawn to and attracted to. We approach them with a smile on our face and can't wait to be there.But if the environment is what researchers call need-thwarting or need-frustrating—meaning it frustrates and thwarts those needs—then we avoid it.Sarah: Mm-hmm.Dr. Justin: Or, if we're in those environments, we act in ways that are challenging.So the basic psychological needs are:Number one: a sense of relationship, or relatedness. That's the technical term they use.Relatedness is a sense of mutual belonging.Sarah: So would it be similar to mattering? Like you feel like you matter to somebody?Dr. Justin: Yeah. There's been a lot of talk recently about mattering.But it's reciprocal mattering. It's not just one-way.It's I matter to you, but you matter to me.Sarah: Yeah.Dr. Justin: Let me use Mother's Day as an example.We just had Mother's Day in Australia at the start of May.If I've got a great relationship with my mother-in-law, and it's Mother's Day, I'm probably going to spend the morning with my wife and family while my children celebrate their mum. Then maybe at lunchtime, we head over to the in-laws to celebrate my wife's mum.If I feel like that relationship need is supported at my mother-in-law's—meaning there's mutual belonging, I matter to her, she matters to me, we enjoy one another's company, and it feels good—I'm going to say:“Great. Let's get in the car. Let's go. What do we need to do?”But if I'm going to a need-frustrating environment—if there's tension, antagonism, snide remarks, eye rolls, silence, defensiveness, or wounds from bad things that happened in the past—that environment doesn't feel good to me.So I'm going to say to Kylie:“Honey, why don't you take the kids to your mum's? Have a great lunch. We've made a big mess this morning, and I think the best thing I can do for your Mother's Day”—and I'll frame it nicely, of course—“is stay home, tidy the house, clean up the kitchen, get everything ready, and put dinner on for tonight so you can have your perfect Mother's Day dinner. I'll see you in four hours.”And then I send her out the door.Why?Because my in-laws' home has become a need-thwarting or need-frustrating environment. I just don't want to be there.And if I am there, I'm going to be sullen and sulky. I might try my best for half an hour and then say, “Oh, this is too hard,” and retreat—Sarah: Or text. The adult version of misbehavior.Dr. Justin: Yes, exactly. Exactly.But if I'm a child in a need-thwarting or need-frustrating environment, I'm going to get into fights with the kids I don't like.Or I'm going to say, “I don't want to go to school because everyone picks on me because I don't regulate my behavior properly because I've got ADHD.”Right?So school becomes a place I don't want to go.Or maybe you have a faith background and your child doesn't have any friends at church.Or you've signed them up for soccer, but they don't know anyone on the team.And they're saying, “Yeah, but I don't want to go.”It all comes down to relationship.Relationship is the basic psychological need that's being thwarted.Now, the second basic psychological need is competence.Competence, I would describe as feeling like I can do the thing I'm being asked to do.Sarah: Or that I want to do.Dr. Justin: Yeah. We'll get to want to in just a second, because want-to is the third basic psychological need—autonomy.So stay with me on competence for a second.Competence is capability. Capacity.It's not even necessarily about being able to do something—it's about feeling like you're making progress toward the goal.Let's say I'm joining acrobatics and trying to learn how to do a handstand.That's really tricky. It's a tough skill.If I show up every week to acrobatics, even if I've got great friends there—so my relationship need is supported—and I love my coach, but every time I try to do a handstand my shoulders buckle, my elbows aren't straight, my form is wrong, I fall over, or I can't stay up…After four or five or six weeks, I'm going to say:“I don't like this anymore. I'm out.”I had a daughter who wanted to come cycling with me.I'm a really keen cyclist. I ride on the road. I'm a middle-aged man in Lycra.But I also ride on the velodrome.You've seen those velodrome bikes at the Olympics—the indoor track where they go around and around and around.You might have noticed that after they finish the race, they keep pedaling and do another 10 laps.The reason is twofold.Number one: there are no brakes on those bikes.And second: they use what's called a fixed gear, meaning that when the wheels are spinning, the pedals are spinning.If you stop pedaling, you're going to get thrown over the handlebars because the wheels are still moving, which means the pedals are still moving, even if you try to stop them.So you just have to keep riding until the bike slows down.My daughter wanted to come to Friday night velodrome racing with me.We didn't have the money, but we spent all this cash on a bike, the Lycra, the helmet, the special shoes—it cost a lot, and I was a poor university student.But my daughter wanted to cycle with me, and I wasn't going to miss that opportunity. So we sacrificed and made it happen.Unfortunately, she was competing against girls who had been riding for four, five, or six years.For the first few weeks, she gave it a good go, but she was losing by several laps every race.After about a month, she said:“Dad, I don't want to do this anymore.”And my response was:“But I've spent all this money.”But what was really going on was that as much as she liked the girls and the atmosphere, she didn't feel competent—Sarah: Mm-hmm.Dr. Justin: —and she didn't see progress.She didn't feel like she was ever going to master the activity, so her motivation and wellbeing plummeted.Cycling became a need-thwarting environment for her.Whether it's piano, violin, rock climbing, cycling, swimming, math, PE class—it doesn't matter.If your kids don't feel like they can do the thing, they're going to push back.They're going to say:“This is too hard. I don't like it.”They won't use these exact words, but what they're really saying is:“This is a need-frustrating environment for me. I don't like it. I don't want to be there.”And then they start to act out.My mom got to the stage with me as a 13-year-old boy where she was physically holding me by the arm and dragging me into my piano lessons.Dr. Justin: Which brings me to my third and final basic psychological need, which is autonomy.A lot of people hear the word autonomy and think it means freedom—that kids can do whatever they want. They think it means independence.That's not what autonomy means, certainly not in the strict scientific form we're talking about within this theory.Rather, autonomy comes down to identifying the value of an activity and therefore endorsing the actions required to do the activity.See, if I, as a 12-year-old, looked at piano and thought:This is going to be a lifelong skill that will bring me joy, that I'll be able to share with others, that I can use in service of my family and community. If I can play piano or keyboard, I could be in a band. I could do all of these things.If I identified the value in the activity, then I would endorse the work required to learn it.So autonomy is not about freedom and independence. It's about choice based on values.That's a lot when you're thinking about three-, four-, and five-year-olds, but not necessarily—Sarah: No, I love that.We talk about that all the time in my communities—how important it is for kids to have autonomy.And I think you can have autonomy even when kids can't be independent, right?Because you can't have a four-year-old who's independent, but you can have a four-year-old who can make decisions that matter.Dr. Justin: Yes, yes.And that decision goes well beyond, Do you want to wear the blue suit or the green one?Sarah: I'll quote our friend Alfie Kohn. He says, “Kids should have the ability to make decisions that make adults gulp a little bit.”Dr. Justin: I love it. Yes. Beautiful.Let me give an adult version of this, and then I'll swing it back into childhood, because sometimes parents hear this and think, This isn't quite computing for me.In Canada, you drive on the right-hand side of the road.Sarah: Mm-hmm.Dr. Justin: And it's true that if you choose to drive on the left-hand side of the road, the authorities will probably get involved. You may cause harm to somebody. You could even end up in prison.But even in the middle of the night, when nobody's on the road, I can't imagine there are too many Canadians who get in the car and think:Tonight's the night. Nobody's watching. I'm gonna drive on the left.You are being absolutely controlled by the government and by the law. You're driving on the right-hand side of the road.But because you identify the value in driving on the right-hand side of the road, nobody has to compel you to do it.You just do it because you endorse the idea that driving on the right is safer. It's what you need to do.So our job with our children is twofold.First, when it comes to these basic psychological needs, we want to help them be in environments—or create environments—where those needs are supported.We want to send them to a school where they have good relationships, where somebody says, “Hey, come sit with us,” where teachers know them by name and smile when they see them and are excited to support them.A school where they're able to experience progress—which might mean less emphasis on grades and more emphasis on developing capability.And a school where they feel like they have some say in where they're going and what they're doing.Rather than being forced to attend a school like I was when I was a teenager, they get to say:“No, I want to go to that school because that's where my friends are.”Or:“That's where the teachers help me feel good.”Or:“That's where my interests lie.”That's the basic psychological-needs concept.Now let's bring that into discipline, which is what started this whole conversation.Based on this theory—and I guess it ties back to a lot of what Alfie Kohn has said as well—I developed a little model that's really easy to memorize and even easier to enact.I call it the Three E's of Effective Discipline.The Three E's of Effective Discipline are need-supportive.If you look at the root of the word discipline, it comes from the idea that we teach, guide, and instruct—that we show the way to follow.Sarah: Mm-hmm.Dr. Justin: But if you look at the modern definition of discipline, the modern definition is punish.Punish means exact retribution. It means hurt. It means make someone pay a price.Sarah: Make people feel bad on purpose.Dr. Justin: Yeah. That's exactly right.And I'm interested in disciplining our kids, not punishing our kids.Punishment is need-thwarting, right?If you make someone feel bad on purpose, there goes the relationship. They feel incompetent, and you've taken away their autonomy.So standard discipline strategies—whether it's time-out, spanking, yelling, withdrawing privileges, taking away the iPad, bribery—all of those standard discipline practices trample over basic psychological needs.We've got to come up with something better.So I developed the Three E's of Effective Discipline, which are basically this:On a beautiful bed of empathy, we explore, we explain, and we empower.Sarah: Ooh, I love that.Dr. Justin: Explore basically means I sit down with my child at an appropriate time.Because we always try to fix things right here, right now.Sometimes we need to, but often intervention simply to make sure people and property aren't hurt—that's all you need.Then you can say to your child:“We'll have a chat about this later when nobody's got a head full of steam.”Kick it down the road.You don't have to fix things right here, right now. Most of the time, it's just not necessary.So once everyone is calm, you explore.You say:“Hey, I've noticed there's been a lot of tension in our home lately between you and your brother.”Or:“Have you noticed that for the last few weeks we've had so much conflict about screens?”And your child says, “Yeah.”And you say:“I just want to listen because parenting's about parents, right? I must be getting something wrong here. Can you help me understand what I'm missing? Where am I going wrong? What's the real problem from your perspective?”Now, there are three things that make this better.Number one: never do it with an audience.Kids always want to save face. They don't feel competent when we start these conversations in front of other people.Number two: have some treats.Because once you're feeding them, they're like:“Oh, I'm not in trouble. We're just chatting, and there are cookies,” or a thick shake, or something like that.And number three: take notes.When you're trying to solve problems—and that's really what discipline is—The Three E's of Effective Discipline are about problem-solving.Discipline—meaning helping, teaching, guiding, instructing—is really about solving problems.So if I want to solve problems effectively in my home—if I want to discipline my children well—I'm trying to say:“Where are you coming from? What am I missing?”When you take notes on what your kids are saying, it's amazing how much information they give you because they realize:You're really listening to me.Sarah: Yeah. You're taking me seriously. You're writing down what I say.Dr. Justin: They're blown away by it.So they'll tell you a bunch of stuff.Now, every now and then they won't. Sometimes they'll shrug and say, “I don't know.”And you can say:“Well, if you don't know, that's fine. But if you did know…”This drives kids crazy, but it's my favorite sentence.“If you did know, what do you think the answer would be?”Sarah: Mm-hmm.Dr. Justin: And they roll their eyes.“Well, I don't know. That's what I said. If I knew, I'd tell you, but I don't know.”And I say:“I know you don't know, and I understand that if you did know, you would tell me. But if you did know, what would you tell me?”Sarah: I love that.Dr. Justin: They get this feeling—it's like this horrible psychological trick where:I don't know the answer, but if I had to come up with one, I guess I'd say this…And now the conversation starts.You get momentum.Sarah: You Jedi mind-trick them.Dr. Justin: Yeah. It's beautiful.And you write it down.At no point are you allowed to interrupt.At no point are you allowed to tell them they're wrong.At no point are you allowed to respond with your adult wisdom.You just listen.Sarah: Okay, and we're still on explore?Still on the first E?Dr. Justin: We're still on the first E.You make all these notes, and once it sounds like they've told you everything, you say:“All right. So what you're telling me is…”And then you read the notes back.This is the oldest psychological strategy in the book—I'm not saying anything new here.If they say, “Yes, that's what I'm saying,” you say:“All right. Great. I've got it.”If they say no, then you say:“Oh, what have I missed? How did I get this wrong? Clarify it for me.”And they give you more information.But there's a really valuable question at the end.When they say, “Yes, that's what I'm saying,” you ask:“Fantastic. Is there anything else?”Sarah: Mm-hmm.Dr. Justin: The power of asking that extra question is profound.It forces them to go deeper.Sometimes they'll say, “No, that's it.”But often, their first answers are shallow answers to get you off their back.They're thinking:I'm telling you what I think you want to hear.But when you say:“Got it. You're happy with this answer? Fantastic. Is there anything else going on?”That's when they look at you and think:Oh—you're actually serious about this. You really care.Sarah: And you're really listening to me.Dr. Justin: Yeah.And it's profound what children will give you after you ask, “Is there anything else?”Once you've got everything written down, confirmed, and you're clear, the next step is explain.Dr. Justin: Now, there are a couple of things around explain.Explain is basically the part where you tell them what they need to know. This is the parent bit.But all too often, we step into lecturing, and the kids fall asleep. They're like, “Oh, here we go again. I thought this was going to be different, but it's no different after all.”So there are a couple of things we need to get right here.Number one: if you're going to explain anything to your children, my recommendation is that you keep it to less than 20 seconds.Now, there's no science around this. This is just my experience in talking with parents and kids in my own family. I find that if you talk for more than 10 to 20 seconds, kids really do tune out, and it goes back to the way things have always been.The second thing is that I always ask permission.“Now that I've listened to you, Sarah, there are just one or two things I'd love to run by you about what's going on. Do you mind if I do that?”I want to make this absolutely clear: as a parent, you do not need your child's permission to tell them things. I really, absolutely, honestly believe that. As the parent, you have the right to tell them stuff they need to know.But this isn't about rights. This is about effectiveness.If I launch into, “Well, Sarah, now that I've listened to that, I get it, but I need to tell you these two things,” I'm already bringing defensiveness back into the relationship.Sarah: Mm-hmm.Dr. Justin: Barriers are coming up.Whereas if I say, “Sarah, this is so helpful. As I've listened to you, two things have come to mind. Do you mind if I share both of those with you?” Your instant response, even as I say it—I'm watching your face—Sarah: I'm nodding.Dr. Justin: And you're going—Sarah: Yeah.Dr. Justin: Yeah. I actually want to know.You're opening up your heart and mind to me, and we're just role-playing this.Sarah: Yeah, yeah. Mm-hmm.Dr. Justin: And that's what our kids do. They're like, “Oh, okay.” Because we've given them the courtesy of listening—Sarah: Well, and you're not trying to use your power over them.Dr. Justin: Exactly.This is a non-coercive, really supportive conversation.And I still haven't had this happen. A lot of parents will say, “Well, what happens if they say no?”And I'm like, “I've raised six kids, and they've never actually looked at me and said, ‘Now that I think about it, no, I don't need to know anything that you…'”They've just never done it.But even if they did—Sarah: Well, if they do, it's probably that they're—what did you say? When emotions are high, intelligence is low. Maybe it wasn't the right time to have the conversation.If they're saying no, then they're probably still angry and holding onto whatever was going on for them.Dr. Justin: Exactly.But if they're that angry, they're probably not going to have explored nicely with you anyway.Sarah: Yes, exactly. So pick—Dr. Justin: A different time.You're probably not even going to—Sarah: Get to that point. Yeah.Dr. Justin: So it's very much: keep it really short, ask permission, and then share.Sarah: Okay. So give me examples.You said, “We've been fighting about screens,” was one example. You also gave the example of, “You've been fighting a lot with your brother.”So in the explain—10 to 20 seconds—choose one of those scenarios. After hearing your child, what would you say in that 10 to 20 seconds?Dr. Justin: I did this just the other day with my 16-year-old daughter, Lily, who is on social media more than she should be. There's been some tension and conflict.I listened. She shared some ideas, and I said, “There are just a couple of things I want to run by you. Is that okay?”She said, “Sure, Dad.”I said, “Great. There are certain times when we're trying to connect or have family time, and there are certain contexts where you're on your device and we just can't reach you.”She looked at me and said, “Yeah, I know.”I said, “Okay. The second thing I want to highlight is that we've noticed you're sleeping in because, even though you're not supposed to, you've been taking your phone into your bedroom at night and staying up late scrolling. Unless I'm reading it wrong, I'm pretty sure that's what's been happening.”And she said, “No, I have been, Dad. You're right.”So it's just two really succinct sentences where I'm stating what I'm seeing. I'm sharing my experience.Sarah: Mm-hmm.Dr. Justin: If it were the sibling fighting, I'd say, “Yeah, your brother is really annoying. I get what's going on. Sometimes I wish he didn't live in our house as well.”I might have a joke with them about the challenge associated with that.And then I might say, “So when this happens, can I just share how it feels for me? It breaks my heart. I love both of you so very much, and my dream is for our family to enjoy being in one another's company and to look forward to conversations and jokes and doing the things we do. When this stuff is going on, it feels like that's a pipe dream.“And secondly, psychologically—you know I've got this PhD in psychology—I know that there's damage being done to the way your brother feels about himself. That's what I'm worried about.”So I've had both of those little conversations on two different topics, sharing two different things, and both were about 10 seconds each.Sarah: Mm-hmm.Dr. Justin: Again, it's conversational. It's not lecture-style.Sarah: And it's from the heart.I can feel it, even though this is just an example you're giving. I can feel that it's from your heart—that you're really being open and sharing with your child what your true concerns are.You're not trying to power over or control. You're really sharing a heartfelt sentiment.Dr. Justin: Yeah. Thank you. That's the goal.You won't always do that, but that's the goal.The reason there's a problem is because your values are not being upheld in the home, and you're trying to communicate that in a way that shows you honor them and that they've got a brain.Now, we've used two really grown-up versions—or teenage versions, I guess. But you can have the same conversations with three- and four-year-olds. It's just shorter. It's simpler.Usually, with those conversations, in a pretty tight timeframe—60 to 90 seconds—you've done the whole process.There is a higher-order—Sarah: Okay, so what's the third part?Dr. Justin: Just before I get to that one, if you really want to do the advanced version of explain, what I'll often do after I've explored with my child is say:“Okay, so this is the bit where I'd normally explain what's going on from my point of view. I wonder if you can tell me what you think I'm going to say here.”Sarah: Ah.Dr. Justin: And so I get them to explain the explain to me.The reason that's so effective is that whenever my mouth is the one that's moving, my brain is the one that's working.If I can get their mouth moving, their brain is doing the heavy lifting.Sarah: Love that.Dr. Justin: That's really, really effective.And then the last one—Sarah: Is empower.And you're also helping them see things and develop empathy, right? To see things from somebody else's perspective.Dr. Justin: Yes. Powerful.The last one is empower.That's literally as simple as saying, “Okay, so I get where you're coming from. We've had that conversation very thoroughly. You know what my challenge is here. What do you think we should do?”“Where do we go from here? How do we solve this in a way that we can both feel good about?”It's true that every now and then, your child will shrug their shoulders and say, “I don't know.”Or they'll shrug and say, “Well, we should just do what I want to do.”And as a parent, that's where you step in and say my favorite line:“Don't you just wish? Don't you just wish we could?”Sarah: Mm-hmm.Dr. Justin: Because—well, let me ask you, Sarah. When I say, “Don't you just wish,” or, “Wouldn't it be good if we could?”—same thing—what have I actually said?Sarah: Total empathy. Heaps of empathy.Dr. Justin: Total empathy.But I've also said something else really clearly.Sarah: That that's not going to work.Dr. Justin: Correct. The answer is no.But it's a no with so much love, kindness, empathy, and gentleness in it—Sarah: Mm-hmm.Dr. Justin: —that your child goes, “Oh, yeah. I know.”And then you say, “So let's see if we can come up with a solution that will work.”What else might work for you when it comes to your brother?What else might work for you when it comes to the party on Friday night that I'm not willing to let you go to?What else could work when it comes to our screen challenges? Because this is an ongoing issue for us, isn't it?Every now and then, you won't get an answer right away. You'll say, “Well, let's talk about it again tonight,” or, “Let's talk about it again tomorrow once you've had some time to think about it.”But I'm big on deadlines.“We need to have this worked out by the end of the weekend, okay? I don't want to go through another week of this. We've got to find a solution. If we haven't had another chat by tomorrow night, we're going to sit down and work it out then.”And I also don't have a problem at this point—Laura Walker is a researcher at BYU in Utah, and she did a study published in the Journal of Adolescence where she found that parents who use these kinds of strategies—she's not talking about the Three E's of Effective Discipline, because that's the thing I developed, but it's based on the same sort of theory that she researches—Parents who use these kinds of strategies, even when they do have to step in and say, “All right, well, we haven't come up with a solution, so it's going to be my way,” kids are much more likely to be responsive and compliant—Sarah: Mm-hmm.Dr. Justin: —because we've been through a process with them that is not autocratic. It's not authoritarian.They've felt like they had a voice. Their perspective has been seen and heard. They've had some input.And even though they don't get what they want all the time—because we're the parents, and sometimes the fact that we've climbed 47 rungs on the ladder of life and they've only climbed 13 is all we need.Sarah: That's what I call in my work the goodwill bank.When your kids experience you as collaborative, non-coercive, and not power-tripping—when they know, over the period of their childhood, that they can trust you to take their preferences into account and be respectful of them—then when you do have to say no about something, even if they don't like it, there's this goodwill bank behind you and this level of trust.When you mentioned, “You can't go to the party on Friday,” I never had that issue with my kids because everything was so collaborative.We'd have similar conversations. I didn't have—I'm not very good at thinking of things like the Three E's—but similar kinds of processes where they'd say why they wanted to go, I'd say what my concerns were, and then they'd invariably say, “Oh, yeah, you're probably right.”It was never, “You can't go.”It was, “These are my concerns. This is what I've been thinking about.”Because they experienced that whole process over years of parenting, you don't get the pushback because they don't feel like you're power-tripping them.Dr. Justin: Yeah.Sarah, I had an experience with one of my adult children who was still living at home. I think she was maybe 19 or 20 when this happened.She wanted to go and do something, and I said to her, “You're an adult. You do get to choose for yourself whether you will do this or not, but I've got some really big concerns about you doing it.“I actually think you're putting yourself into a dangerous situation. There's some history, some volatility, and some challenges if you go and involve yourself in this particular activity. Tell me why this is so important to you.”So she walked me through it, and I said, “Okay, I get it. How do my concerns stack up against your desire to be there?”And she said, “Dad, I get what you're saying, but I want to go.”And I said, “Okay, so…”You used that beautiful term, the goodwill bank. I can't remember exactly what my words were, but I'm going to use your term right now, because I essentially said:“I'm going to use the goodwill I've built up with you over the last however many years and step in really firmly and say you're making a mistake.“As your dad, even though you're an adult, I want to forbid you to go. That's how strongly I feel about this. To the degree that I can, I forbid it.“Ultimately, you will choose because you are an adult, but I don't want you there.”Sarah: I'm going on the record.Dr. Justin: Yeah, yeah.“I need you to trust that this is a bad idea. We can come up with any number of other activities you could do instead, with different people in a different location, but this is a bad idea, and you have none of my support should you go.“If you go and something goes wrong, you call me and I'll come rescue you. But it is a bad idea, and I forbid it.”And I couldn't believe I was saying those words. I've never said them in my life, and now I was saying them to an adult.But she looked at me and said, “Okay.”Sarah: Mm-hmm.Dr. Justin: She didn't fight me. She didn't say, “I can do what—”Sarah: No, because you built up the history with her of how she experienced you.Dr. Justin: Yeah. She was like, “Wow, this is serious. He's never said that before. If he feels that strongly, maybe he's right. Maybe I need to find an alternative.”So anyway, that's the Three E's of Effective Discipline.I feel like I've talked too much, Sarah. I wanted to be much more conversational, but I get carried away when we—Sarah: No, no. I love it.I feel like it's very complementary to the things that I teach, and you've given me some new things to teach parents as well.I love having sort of snappy—the Three E's of Discipline. I think that's great. I love it. I'll share it.Dr. Justin: Yeah, please. Absolutely.It's helped so many millions of parents.Sarah: Yeah.Well, I love that we've connected across the world—from the other side of the world to each other—and I look forward to hopefully talking to you again in March of 2027 when your book Boys comes out.I figured we were going to talk about that, but we had such a lovely conversation about peaceful parenting, discipline, and—oh my God, it's gone right out of my head—Dr. Justin: Self-determination theory.Sarah: Self-determination theory.I think it was a really great conversation, and I really appreciate you sharing all of your experience and wisdom.Dr. Justin: I loved the conversation.Like I said, it was too one-sided. I wish we'd been able to go backward and forward a bit more, but let's do it again.Let's chat again next year when the book comes out, and we'll talk about boys and how to help them.There's so much talk about toxic masculinity.Sarah: Mm-hmm.Dr. Justin: Wouldn't it be great if we could give them a view of healthy masculinity—a model of that to follow?That's what my book is all about: how we can guide boys into a healthy form of masculinity.Sarah: Well, for folks in Australia, your book is coming out in June 2026. For folks in North America, it's not coming out until spring 2027.So I will definitely be ringing you up and having you come back on to talk about the book when you've got your North American release. I know we're going to have a great conversation then.Before I let you go, though, I have a question that I ask all my podcast guests:If you had a time machine and you could go back and tell your younger parent self something, what advice would you give yourself?Dr. Justin: Jean-Jacques Rousseau said there is—I can't remember the quote exactly—but: What wisdom is there that is greater than kindness?I've paraphrased it. It's not perfect, but it's something along those lines.Interestingly, Rousseau had, I think, five children—maybe six—and he put them all into orphanages somewhere in the first 18 months of their lives so he could spend more time writing and focusing on how to be a good person, which I just find criminal. I can't believe it.So take it for what it's worth, but “What wisdom is there that's greater than kindness?” is what Rousseau said.I've mentioned this idea of soft eyes a couple of times. If I could go back, I would teach myself about kindness. I'd teach myself about many of the things we've talked about today.But I just want to quickly share the story of soft eyes.As an academic, I want everything I say to be evidence-based. There is no evidence that I'm aware of where people have done any kind of randomized controlled trial where parents are asked to interact with their children with soft eyes, neutral eyes, hard eyes, or anything like that.Soft eyes is this idea—I was giving a presentation at a public library one time, and an elderly lady stepped into the back of the room, sat down, and listened to the last 25 or 30 minutes of my presentation. She must have liked what she could hear from the corridor outside, and she stepped in to listen.After everybody had left, she walked over to me and said, “I really enjoyed what you shared. I'd love to tell you something my grandmother said to me.”So we're going back into the early 1900s.Her grandmother said, “Whenever you're talking to your children about matters of discipline, make sure you have soft eyes.”And I thought, I really like that.Because if you try to have a conversation with somebody and your eyes are soft, you just can't say mean things. You can't say harsh things. You can't have harsh thoughts.If you soften your eyes, your face softens and your heart softens. You have this beautiful compassion and kindness, this ability to see the best in them rather than the worst in them, to assume positive intent.There's something gorgeous about soft eyes.So I would go back and quote Rousseau better than I just quoted him to you, and I would tell my younger self that soft eyes will make a tremendous impact on all of my relationships.Sarah: Ah.There's an American—I don't know if you've heard of him in Australia—but he's a pretty well-known marriage counselor, Terry Real.Dr. Justin: Oh, yeah. I quote him in my book.Sarah: Yeah, yeah. He does a lot of work about—well, he says something like, “There's nothing that harshness can accomplish that kindness can't accomplish better.”Dr. Justin: That's so beautiful.Sarah: Mm-hmm.Dr. Justin: Thank you. That's inspiring. I'm so glad you shared that.Sarah: Yeah. I love it.It's hard to remember, but I think it is true. And I wish that—and I know the world needs a dose of that right now.Dr. Justin: Yeah. Yeah.Sarah: One hundred percent.Well, thank you so much.Where's the best place for folks to go and find out more about you and what you do?Dr. Justin: Probably my podcast, the Happy Families Podcast. My wife and I drop a 15-minute nugget of parenting wisdom every day, five days a week.Sarah: Oh, wow!Dr. Justin: Yeah. It's a lot of content, but it's bite-sized chunks, and it's entertaining. We're fun. We get to do it together.And the Happy Families Podcast. I've got a website called happyfamilies.com.au, but basically, if you like what we've talked about—Sarah: We'll link to all of that in the show notes. We'll link to your website and your podcast, and I'm sure it's easy to find you.Dr. Justin: That sounds great. Thanks, Sarah.Sarah: Thank you so much.Dr. Justin: What a great, great conversation. Lovely to be with you.Reimagine Peaceful Parenting with Sarah Rosensweet Substack is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sarahrosensweet.substack.com/subscribe

It's kind of astonishing, really, that kids ever learn words. Each one poses a little riddle. Does this sound string refer to a person? A category of things? Or maybe some other feature of the blooming, buzzing world? And yet word learning happens. In fact, we now know it begins earlier in infancy than we realized. And we now know, further, that dogs (or at least some dogs) understand words as well. So how does this happen? What do babies and dogs really know about words? And how might we go about figuring this all out? My guests today are Dr. Elika Bergelson and Dr. Claudia Fugazza. Elika is an Associate Professor in the Department of Psychology at Harvard University, where her lab studies how infants learn language. Claudia is a Researcher at Eötvös Loránd University in Hungary, where she and her collaborators study dogs who are especially gifted word learners.  In this conversation, Elika, Claudia, and I talk about the thorny question of what it means to understand a word—and whether there are different degrees or kinds of understanding. We consider the challenges posed by different types of words—by nouns, by names, by verbs, by function words, size terms, and more. We discuss why it is that some dogs are so good at learning words, and why infants of a certain age seem to get so much better at it. We talk about learning in different contexts and situations. And we circle the question of how different word learning really is in dogs and babies.  Alright friends, before we get to it, one tiny ask: If you've been enjoying Many Minds, you can help us grow by leaving a review or comment or a rating, or by sharing us with a friend or colleague. We would greatly appreciate the support! Without further ado, on to my interview with Claudia Fugazza and Elika Bergelson. Enjoy!   Notes 3:30 – A paper on infants' understanding of proper nouns like "Mommy." 6:00 – For our earlier audio essay on names across the animal kingdom, see here. 11:00 – For Dr. Bergelson's early study showing that 6-month-old infants already understand the meanings of some words, see here. 13:30 – For more on the "comprehension boost" in infants after age one, see Dr. Elika's paper here. 16:30 – For Dr. Fugazza and colleagues' first studies on gifted word-learning dogs, see here and here. 20:00 – See earlier studies on Rico and Chaser. 24:00 – For more on the qualitative changes that infants may undergo as they learn to learn words, see a paper by Dr. Bergelson and a colleague here. 30:00 – A study by Dr. Fugazza and colleagues comparing personality profiles and playfulness of gifted word learner dogs and typical dogs. 31:30 – A recent New York Times article consoling readers that having a "dumb" (i.e., non-gifted) dog is okay. 39:30 – A study by Dr. Fugazza and colleagues showing that dogs can extend labels of toys ("pull," "fetch") to new objects that are used in the same way. 43:00 – A study by Dr. Bergelson and a colleague on how broadly (or narrowly) infants' apply labels like "foot" or "juice." A study by Dr. Bergelson and colleagues looking at how familiarity affects infants' understanding of words. 52:00 – For an example of a study on the so-called noun bias in early word learning, see here. For work on the (lack of) a noun bias in Tseltal infants, see here. For a sample discussion of the so-called shape bias, see here. 54:00 – For Dr. Fugazza and colleagues' work on dogs' biases toward shape or texture when generalizing about objects, see here. 57:00 – For the work by Asifa Majid (former guest!) on odor words in Jahai, see here. For the work on scent-tracking in humans, see here. 1:02:00 – On "dog-directed speech" and its consequences, see here and here. For comparisons of dog- and infant-directed speech, see here and here. 1:04:00 – For the study finding that Tseltal-speaking children learn honorific terms (which are never addressed to them), see here. 1:06:00 – For the study by Dr. Fugazza and colleagues, "examining exclusion-based choice" in dogs, see here. For the study by Dr. Fugazza and colleagues showing that gifted word learner dogs can learn by over-hearing labels, see here. 1:10:00 – For the study showing that children seem to request labels for objects by pointing to them, see here. 1:12:00 – For some of the first scientific studies on the use of soundboards for communication in dogs, see here and here. For our earlier episode with Dr. Federico Rossano discussing some of this research, see here.   Recommendations 'The Invention of Language by Children,' by Lila Gleitman and Elissa Newport 'Concept-based word learning in human infants,' by Jun Yin and Gergely Csibra 'Syntactic bootstrapping as a mechanism for language learning,' by Mireille Babineau et al. The Genius Dog Challenge YouTube channel   Many Minds is a project of the Diverse Intelligences Summer Institute, which is made possible by a generous grant from the John Templeton Foundation to Indiana University. The show is hosted and produced by Kensy Cooperrider, with help from Assistant Producer Urte Laukaityte and with creative support from DISI Directors Erica Cartmill and Jacob Foster. Our artwork is by Ben Oldroyd. Subscribe to Many Minds on Apple, Stitcher, Spotify, Pocket Casts, Google Play, or wherever you listen to podcasts. You can also now subscribe to the Many Minds newsletter here! We welcome your comments, questions, and suggestions. Feel free to email us at: manymindspodcast@gmail.com. For updates about the show, visit our website or follow us on Bluesky (@manymindspod.bsky.social).

In this episode, we're diving into the psychology of resentment — especially for overfunctioners who feel like they're carrying everything on their shoulders.If you've ever found yourself thinking:“Why am I the only one doing everything?”“Must be nice…”“I wish people would help me more…”…this episode is for you.We explore:Why resentment is often rooted in envy/jealousy rather than angerThe hidden desires underneath “must be nice”Why overfunctioners struggle to receive helpThe subconscious belief that love must be earned through doingThe dynamic between overfunctioners and underfunctioners in relationshipsWhy boundaries and support can actually feel uncomfortable in your bodyHow Human Design helps untangle conditioning from your authentic selfThis episode is an invitation to start seeing resentment not as proof that something is wrong with you — but as information about the parts of yourself you haven't felt safe to embody yet.✨ Ready to explore your patterns on a deeper level?Pattern Readings help uncover the subconscious beliefs and relational dynamics shaping the way you move through life, work, and relationships.Learn more or book here: Pattern Reading.Any questions? You can always email me at nicole@nicoleguenaconsulting.com

"When we think about the people who fought the Trojan War, we naturally assume they possessed an inner monologue. We imagine them feeling fear, weighing their tactical options, and making conscious choices. But the textual evidence suggests the warriors of 1200 BCE had no internal mind at all. ..." Learn more by reading "Conversations on Consciousness and the Bicameral Mind," currently on sale for a limited time:https://www.amazon.com/Conversations-Consciousness-Bicameral-Mind-Interviews/dp/1737305534https://www.julianjaynes.org/book/conversations-on-consciousness-and-the-bicameral-mind/Video produced by Marcel Kuijsten using generative AI tools and reviewed by human editors for accuracy and clarity.

Hi friends! I have a brand new podcast episode live, and today we are talking all about metabolism, hormones, and what it actually takes to feel good in your body after 40!! I'm sitting down with Dani Conway, board certified functional nutrition practitioner and founder of Nutrition the Natural Way. Dani lost 65 pounds herself after years of yo-yo dieting and gut and hormone struggles, and she has since spent her career helping thousands of women do the same. Her approach is rooted in testing, not guessing, and she has years of experience transforming thousands of women's lives. I think you're going to love her. If you've ever felt like you're doing all the "right" things but still feel stuck, exhausted, or like your metabolism just isn't cooperating the way it used to, then check out what we chat about: Why low calorie and low fat dieting can actually damage your metabolism long term and what to do instead The role of protein and healthy fats in hormone production and sustainable weight loss Why nutrition is the foundation everything else builds on, including gut health and hormone balance How Dani approaches macros with her clients, from lower carb all the way to carnivore, and why there is no one-size-fits-all Functional lab testing and why "testing not guessing" changes everything The connection between gut health, hormones, and stubborn weight that won't budge Her take on peptides, which ones she uses with clients, why she always starts with minimum effective dose, and what to watch out for on social media Her thoughts on GLP-1s and why they are never her first recommendation How to know when your body is actually ready for more advanced interventions And so much more!! It was so so great getting to talk with Dani and I hope you love this episode! If you've ever felt like you've tried everything and your body just isn't responding, this one is for you! ___________________________________________________________________________________________________________ Dani Conway is a sought-after functional medicine expert, as well as a Board Certified Functional Diagnostic Nutrition Practitioner, who also holds many other credentials within the alternative health space. She is the founder of the Fat Burn Formula for Women Over 40, and has spent almost 20 years challenging the conventional western approach to women's health, specializing in hormone optimization, metabolic nutrition, and sustainable fat loss for women over 40. Dani is also the owner of her practice, Nutrition the Natural Way, and has worked with thousands of clients, combining cutting-edge strategies with personalized protocols to deliver transformational results for all of the women she works with. After overcoming her own 65-pound weight loss journey and healing severe hormone and gut dysfunction, Dani developed a comprehensive, innovative methodology that goes beyond the traditional diet mentality. Her "test don't guess" approach utilizes customized nutrition protocols, advanced lab testing, and breakthrough strategies to address the root causes of metabolic dysfunction with a true focus on rebalancing the body from the inside out! Through her signature programs and high-level private coaching, Dani has helped thousands of driven women - entrepreneurs, professionals, and moms - go from feeling fat, frustrated and fatigued to energized, balanced and comfortable in their skin. Her mission is to truly help midlife women "stop starving and start living" through science-backed solutions that create lasting transformation. Dani initially earned her bachelor's degree in Psychology before expanding her expertise across multiple areas of functional health. She holds various certifications in modalities of both functional nutrition and functional medicine, while continuing to stay at the forefront of her industry; proving that your 40s and beyond can absolutely be your most vibrant years yet! Website: www.NutritiontheNaturalWay.com Connect with Dani on: FB: @NutritiontheNaturalWay IG: @DaniConwayOfficial   Partners: Shop Oliveda here. Try out luxury handbags and jewelry from Vivrelle and use my code GINAHARNEY for your first month free! Check out We Feed Raw! Maisey goes crazy for this! I use it as a topper for her kibble or mix it into her pup loaf. You can try the raw version, the raw dehydrated kibble, and they'll help you customize a plan for your pup. Use FITNESSISTA40 for 40% off your Meal Plan Starter Box here! Check out my new favorite red light device here, and use the code FITNESSISTA for a huge discount.  I've been using Nutrisense on and off for a couple of years now. I love being able to see how my blood sugar responds to my diet and habits, and run experiments. You can try out Nutrisense here and use GINA30 for 30% off. If any of my fellow health professional friends are looking for another way to help their clients, I highly recommend IHP. You can also use this information to heal yourself and then go one to heal others, which I think is a beautiful mission. You can absolutely join if you don't currently work in the health or fitness industry; many IHPs don't begin on this path. They're friends who are passionate to learn more about health and wellness, and want to share this information with those they love. You can do this as a passion, or start an entirely new career. You can use my referral link here and the code FITNESSISTA for up to $250 off the Integrative Health Practitioner program. I highly recommend it!  

When we’re detached from our emotions, things can feel a little… flat. But though our brain might be trying to protect us from harm, emotionally detaching stops us from being able to appreciate the true richness of life. In this episode, we’ll unpack why emotional blunting occurs, the ways we might be avoiding our true emotions, and look at some ways to actually start to process your emotions. We explore: • Why we’re bad at feeling what we’re feeling • The hidden strategies we use to push our emotions away • How maladaptive coping mechanisms can cause us long-term harm• Why most emotions are actually driven by fear • How we can more effectively process our emotions Watch on Netflix: HERE Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com Our favourite sources: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/12916575/https://positivepsychology.com/maladaptive-coping/https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/basics/intellectualization The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This week we have questions from a writer who went no contact with her parents but wants a relationship with the family, a writer whose husband openly disrespects her, and a writer who is worried for his depressed and irritable employee. Join our patreon!Listen ad-free, get the show a day early and enjoy the pre-show hang out on the same app you're using RIGHT NOW at www.Patreon.com/Therapy where you can also access our vast library of deep dives, interviews, skill shares, reviews and rants as well as our live discord chat!If you are an Apple user please rate us!If you are a Spotify user, please rate us!Submit a question to the show!Help us reach #1 on Goodpods!Interested in Nick's mental health approach to fitness? Check out www.MentalFitPersonalTraining.comCheck out Dr. Jim's book "Dadvice: 50 Fatherly Life Lessons" at www.DadviceBook.comGrab some swag at our store, www.PodTherapyBaitShop.comPlay Jim's Neurotic Bingo at home while you listen to the show, or don't, I'm not your supervisor.Submit questions to:www.PodTherapy.netPodTherapyGuys@gmail.comFollow us on Social Media:FacebookInstagramTwitterResources:Suicide Prevention Lifeline - 1-800-273-8255.Veterans Crisis Line - 1-800-273-8255.Substance Abuse & Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) National Helpline - (1-800-662-HELP (4357)OK2Talk Helpline Teen Helpline - 1 (800) 273-TALKU.S. Mental Health Resources Hotline - 211

In this insightful episode of In The Lab, Ruben sits down with Wendy Wei from Relay Financial to unpack one of the most overlooked skills in entrepreneurship and real estate investing: understanding your cash flow. What starts as a conversation around money management quickly turns into a deeper discussion on psychology, conditioning, identity, habits, and the systems that shape how entrepreneurs operate their businesses and lives.Wendy shares her journey from growing up in a traditional immigrant household to building a career across psychology, marketing, SaaS, storytelling, and fintech. With a background in psychology from Harvard University and experience spanning photography, creator partnerships, and performance marketing, Wendy explains how curiosity, experimentation, and human behavior became the foundation for the work she does today helping business owners better understand and organize their finances.The episode dives deep into the Profit First framework and how entrepreneurs can stop operating with one giant “bucket” of money and instead build systems that create visibility, automation, accountability, and profitability. Ruben also breaks down exactly how Invested Escapes uses Relay internally across multiple properties, vendors, virtual cards, owner payouts, and operational systems to move faster and stay organized while scaling nationwide.Relay is a digital banking and money management platform that helps real estate investors get clear visibility into what they're earning, spending and saving—so they can better understand the cash flow in their business.Throughout the conversation, Wendy also shares powerful insights around neuroplasticity, conditioning, growth mindset, rewiring limiting beliefs, and how small consistent habits can completely change the trajectory of your life and business over time. This episode blends entrepreneurship, psychology, systems, and financial organization into one conversation designed to help operators think differently about both money and growth.Tune in now to learn how to stop leaking money, organize your business like a true operator, and build systems that help you pay yourself first while scaling with clarity.Sign Up For Relay through My Referral Link: https://join.relayfi.com/partner/?referralcode=temporaryhousingmeetup&utm_source=events&utm_medium=…HIGHLIGHTS:42:21 - Wendy talks about rewiring your brain through growth mindset. 55:50 - Wendy talks about automating cash flow for entrepreneurs. Keeping it Real:01:00 – Building micro communities03:20 – Understanding cash flow06:10 – Graduation season pressure11:30 – Travel shapes perspective15:20 – Psychology meets marketing16:30 – Curiosity drives growth20:10 – Small actions compound31:00 – Understanding conditioning34:30 – Coaching changed everything36:00 – Rewiring self-talk42:20 – Neuroplasticity explained46:10 – Identity shapes habits51:20 – Profit First explained54:40 – Automating cash flow58:20 – Relay inside operations1:03:00 – Virtual card controls1:07:00 – Banking misconceptions1:10:00 – Most-used Relay features1:15:00 – Building real community1:17:00 – People over logos #RealEstateInvesting #ProfitFirst #CashFlowManagement #EntrepreneurMindset #RelayFinancial #BusinessSystems #FinancialFreedom #MoneyManagement #RealEstateBusiness #Entrepreneurship CONNECT WITH THE GUESTLinkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/company/bankwithrelay/https://www.linkedin.com/in/wendyhwei/

222: Santorini Secrets: Mediterranean Living at MIA'S Kiki goes on location to Greece to experience the Mediterranean Diet — Santorini style. Today's Lexi:  Μεζέ – Meze – Appetizers In Today's Episode: Join Kiki and Sellia, owner of Mia's Restaurant on the island of Santorini in Greece. Today you will love an authentic and vibrant conversation about the Mediterranean food that is prepared and crafted by an all-woman kitchen spearheaded by chef Ellie.  What is fava, and how versatile is it? What is the secret to Mia's village salad, and how did Sellia get to Santorini in the first place?  There's so much more to this conversation, so please tune in. Resources: Mia's Restaurant Cupitol Coffee Cupitol — The Restaurant About Sellia Sellia Georges is a third-generation restaurateur whose family has been part of Chicago's restaurant industry for more than 40 years. Growing up, she worked in her family's restaurants — JC Georges (opened in 1982), OPA Estiatorio, Portofino Italian, and Elly's Brunch Café — and later worked alongside her father on the opening of the Elly's 24-Hour concept in downtown Chicago in 2010.   Sellia considers Cupitol to be the evolution of Elly's, bringing together an easy-going European atmosphere with an all-day dining experience. She opened the first Cupitol Coffee & Eatery location in Evanston in 2016, followed by a second location in Chicago's Streeterville neighborhood in 2017, and a third location featuring an expanded bakery in West Loop in 2021. Her vision was to create a versatile space where guests could enjoy breakfast or coffee with friends, a full meal, work at a communal table or lounge, or simply grab a cold-pressed juice to go. Her Greek heritage is reflected throughout Cupitol, from the relaxed lounge atmosphere to the menu, which features house-made pastries, specialty roasted coffee, and creative cocktails.   Sellia's next concept brought her back to her roots with the opening of MIA'S Restaurant in Oia, Santorini, where her ancestors were born. Conceived during the pandemic, MIA'S has since become one of the most beloved restaurants in Oia, offering comforting yet elevated Greek cuisine through a modern, seasonal lens.   Most recently, in December 2024, she launched Cupitol The Restaurant, an expanded evolution of the Cupitol concept and the brand's fourth location. Her goal was to create an accessible all-day restaurant serving delicious, high-quality food and drinks for breakfast, brunch, lunch, and dinner at approachable prices. In addition to the signature Cupitol offerings, the restaurant features a specially curated dinner menu designed exclusively for this concept.   Alongside her extensive hospitality experience, Sellia holds a bachelor's degree in Sociology from Kingston University and a master's degree in Psychology from University of Essex. Credits: Music: Spiro Dussias Vocals: Zabrina Hay Graphic Designer: Manos Koumparakis  

  Subscribe in a reader Check out my product recommendations for Narcissist Abuse Survivors! – https://www.amazon.com/shop/tracymalone *As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases. Listen to my podcasts anytime by subscribing with your favorite provider! The post Estranged Adult Children: Jessica Bollinger Shares the Truth No Parent Wants to Hear appeared first on Narcissist Abuse Support.

Daniel J. Perafan, Meno Fernandez, and James Pontillo join Geo Perez and Derek Drescher on "On The Gate" for a deep dive into historical trade routes, the roast comedy scene, and the raw psychology of the legal system.In This Episode:Global History & Economics: Daniel J. Perafan breaks down the history of colonization in Colombia, the expansion of historical empires, and the brutal economic realities of underground markets.The NYC Roast Scene: The crew is joined by James Pontillo to discuss the behind-the-scenes stress of writing for a comedy roast and navigating local independent venues.New York Politics & Legends: A look back at NYC mayors over the decades and the cultural impact of Curtis Sliwa's Street Smart series.True Crime Breakdown: The guys analyze the latest updates and trial footage from the Julio Foolio case, discuss the reality of high-stakes court charges, and share what it honestly feels like to sit in a courtroom awaiting a sentencing verdict.Gaming Culture: Geo admits his current obsession with MLB The Show.ON THE GATE! ENJOY!Original air date: 5/18/26Join the live chat Wednesday nights at 11pm EST. Uncensored versions of the show streamed Monday and Thursday at 2pm EST on GaSDigital.com. Signup with code OTG for the archive of the show and others like Legion of Skanks, In Godfrey We Trust, and Story Warz. FOLLOWGeo PerezInstagram - https://www.instagram.com/geoperez86/Derek DrescherInstagram - https://www.instagram.com/derekdrescher/00:20 - Intro Beats & Audio Check01:00 - Geo's MLB The Show Obsession02:50 - The History of Global Colonization & Trade09:20 - The Logistics and Economics of Underground Markets12:20 - Why Geo Doesn't Trust the Stock Market15:10 - Industry Writers & Behind-the-Scenes Comedy Secrets16:40 - Navigating Envy in the Modern Comedy Landscape22:05 - The Mental Hustle: Performing After a Tragedy23:50 - The Art of Writing for a Roast27:45 - Navigating Local Indie Comedy Rooms30:30 - Curtis Sliwa's Street Smart Series & NYC History31:15 - Rating New York Mayors Over the Years34:30 - Pop Culture: The Chappelle's Show Legacy in Real Life39:45 - Analyzing the New Julio Foolio Trial Footage43:15 - The Reality of High-Stakes Legal Sentences & Charges47:20 - True Crime: Historic Jailbreaks & Security Flaws50:30 - The Psychology of Hearing a Courtroom Sentence52:00 - DMV Realities & State Bureaucracy57:00 - Upcoming Dates & Guest PlugsSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Why is it so hard to stop eating ultra-processed foods — even when you know they're hurting you? In Episode 13 of this 16-part series, Dr. Brendan McCarthy explains why the real problem is not just the food itself. The real problem is the loop: Cue or emotional state → Wanting → Bargaining → Consumption → Temporary relief → Crash/regret → Repeat. This episode explores how ultra-processed and hyper-palatable foods become attached to stress, boredom, loneliness, exhaustion, anxiety, and emotional discomfort — training the brain to seek relief through food. Key ideas from this episode: • Hunger is the body asking for nourishment • Wanting is the conditioned brain asking for the expected hit • The food is the bait. The loop is the trap. • The food breaks the feeling. It does not heal the source. • You cannot remove a counterfeit regulator without restoring real regulation. Dr. McCarthy breaks down why willpower alone often fails and why lasting change requires a physiologic off-ramp: stable meals, protein, fiber, hydration, sleep, movement, emotional regulation, cue reduction, social planning, and relapse repair. This is not about “perfect eating.” It is about building a life where food is no longer your primary regulator of stress, comfort, or identity. If you've ever felt trapped in cravings, emotional eating, binge-restrict cycles, or constant food noise, this episode is designed to help you understand the mechanism behind the loop — and how to begin leaving it.

Send us Fan MailOn this weeks episode of Grease The Wheels, we ask Gemini why customers are the way they are. There is a good portion of the customer base who knows that their cars are going to break, knows that they can't fix them, and trusts you to make the right call when it comes to diagnosing and fixing the problems that they have to get back on the road. There is another segment of the customer base that might not trust you 100%, but is still captive to their own lack of knowledge and likely financial constraints. Then there is the third category of customers who don't know anything, think they know everything, and are some of the most unreasonable people walking the earth today. We also get into the idea of firing customers, the old of video when it comes to informing that second cadre into making the right decisions, and the idea that the service advisors are often the unwilling hostages in these situations. Bottom line, customers need to make the right decisions, and we need to frame those right decisions properly from top to bottom. Also Uncle Jimmy forgets that the most important part of the ‘Psychology of Selling' isn't in the pitch - it's in asking the right questions to make your pitch that much more impactful. This Episode of Grease the Wheels is brought to you in partnership with Surfwrench Digital! For more on Video MPI Training Visit https://www.surfwrench.com/video-mpi-training-landing/ to learn more. Video MPI Training built in the shop, by your Uncle Jimmy. Use code “GTW” for 50% off your training access!  

Darrell Spencer on Shark Tank, Marketing Psychology, TikTok Growth & Exit Strategy Secrets

Support Dr. Grande on Patreon: ⁠https://www.patreon.com/drgrande⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Dr. Grande's book Harm Reduction: ⁠https://www.amazon.com/Harm-Reduction-Todd-Grande-PhD/dp/1950057313⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Dr. Grande's book Psychology of Notorious Serial Killers: ⁠https://www.amazon.com/Psychology-Notorious-Serial-Killers-Intersection/dp/1950057259⁠ Check out Dr. Grande's merchandise ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://teespring.com/stores/dr-grandes-store⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What happens after a monster sale hits your category?Not just the headline.Not the screenshots.Not the dopamine.What happens inside the minds of collectors?In this flagship episode of Stacking Slabs, Brett breaks down the psychology behind category repricing through the lens of the Randy Orton WrestleMania Patch Auto sale and why these moments impact collectors far beyond the final hammer price.This conversation explores: Why collectors react emotionally to monster sales  How identity and ownership shape pricing behavior  The difference between a signal and a true market shift  Why niche categories only need a few serious buyers to change liquidity  How collectors confuse attention with actual demand  Why one grail sale does not automatically reprice an entire category  The danger of turning headlines into inventory decisions This is an episode about interpretation.The collectors who win long-term are not the fastest reactors.They are the clearest thinkers.Check out the awesome software that InfernoRed Technology can build for you.Sign up for Hobby Jobs and The Weekly Rip for freeGet your free copy of Collecting For Keeps: Finding Meaning In A Hobby Built On HypeStart your 7 day free trial of Stacking Slabs Patreon Today[Distributed on Sunday] Sign up for the Stacking Slabs Weekly Rip Newsletter using this linkFollow Stacking Slabs: | Twitter | Instagram | Facebook | Tiktok ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★