Expertologists Classics (the first 25 episodes)

If you're a fan of the film 28 Days, or the film 28 Days Later, or the film 28 Weeks Later, or the film 28-Skiddoo, you're going to love our 28th episode!

Quite possibly the newest episode of the Expertologists you've ever heard!

The Expertologists take on a slew of questions in a slurry of excitement!

A new fun-filled episode that you'll have to hear to believe that you heard!

Trust is more than just a word that sometimes follows the words "Bank" and "and." This week we explore who and what our listeners can or should trust. Also, what's BuryBall? And what's BarryBall? And what's BarleyBall? And what's BarelyBall? Find out!

We have as many words for "explanation" as Eskimos have for snow, and we prove it in this episode. We also take a question posed in our facebook forum that brings together schools of thought from Leonard Skynyrd and Albert Einstein.

Tired of breathing all that Hitler air? Wondering what about the possibility of a dark side, a hidden underbelly of the seemingly cherubic Expertologists hosts? This episode unearths some less-than-stellar qualities and foibles of the doctors.

The gang discuss the best wrist-watch for polar climes, get visited by the least interesting ghost of all time, and deal with yet another of Justin's destructive proclivities. When will that guy learn?

The Expertologists tackle the issue mechanical dancing flowerpot makers have been trying to hide for years: suicidal, tortured plants. Have they lead Justin to a life of rocketarianism? Is that safe? And is Charlie breathing or eating air? And while we're at it: is Kit falling in love with a bad-boy caller? And to top it all off: a special glance into Steve's comedy archive for a bit of Morton and Schmorton!

In this episode, the Expertologists tackle the issue Mutual of Omaha tries to sweep under the rug: animal suicide. Also, what is the least safe way of tanning oneself, and should it be avoided? The answer is probably yes, but you may want to listen anyway. And finally... Movie moguls, this one's for you: an Expertologists guide to crafting the perfect movie title!

How long does it take a dog to smoke a pipe? How does a dog know what time it is? These questions may not be as unrelated as you seem to think they are. And not just because they both involve dogs and the measurement of time. Well, kind of just that. But kind of something much deeper! Then the show takes an emotional turn when the Expertologists decide that one of their own needs an intervention.

The expertologists go international, answering queries from all points on the globe, from the U.K. to Los Angeles. Amish "bling" is explained, as well as its relationship to the more popular "blang." Then the expertologists take on the fat cats behind the controversial spell-check industree.

Drs. Kranz and Hilliard take a trip down memory lane to their frat days, and then quickly leave the room for somewhat inexplicable reasons. The legalities surrounding Henry David Thoreau and his connection to HDTV are discussed thoreaully, all while Dr. Harwood balances atop Charlie Kranz's grandfather. It has to be heard to be believed!

Where do winks come from (if you know what we mean)? And the subtlety button are discussed this week. Also, a brief deconstruction of the merits of Worthadam® software.

The second half of our Super Bowl Blow-Out for 2008! Ever wonder why referees wear stripes? Ever wonder why the Hoagie Sales around Georgetown University are through the roof? Soon you won't be wondering, you'll be wandering! To tell other people the answers to these questions, that is!

The first of a two-part Superbowl Special! The gang discusses Gary, their legal representation, and the problems he's sorting out (and in some cases, caused). They also dig into the background of Bowls, Chili, and the Hat-Wearing Lower Class.

Australian currency is discussed, especially as related to the possibility of a Divine Intervention in its creation in Tasmania. Many childhood memories are rehashed, including the speedy Dilly Wagon and the story of Johnny Appleseed. Hippy Farmers take their lumps, but also garner a few props for the miracles they've been working in the asphalt jungle of Cleveland, OH.

In this episode, The Gavel of Zarcon is discussed and hyped even more than it had been previously. Also the old "left hand in the lap" question is discussed, and its history explained. The Pottery Lobby is put back onto the fire for another coat of glaze, and the Sky Wasp is explained, not that it really needed any explanation.

It's sweeps week at the Expertologists (KERPLOWWW!)The gang answers 1 million questions in a half hour, offers to give away a huge $400 prize to anyone that can stump the doctors, all while being fed clumps of grapes by bikini-clad models. Oh, and Justin is a cyborg. But that makes sense, because he's Dutch.

The doctors discuss the old days, back when their van was a-rockin' and people thought twice about knockin.' Unless the rocking was being done by Aaron's pet parrot. Also discussed: the steamy Mother Teresa novel so controversial that its name doesn't appear on the cover. And it's all brought to you -- somewhat annoyingly -- by Ikea.

The gang discusses the differences (and similarities) between "laughter" and "slaughter." Alvin Purple is met with cheers and healthy skepticism, and the Expertologists Studio phone bank almost burns out during a marathon call-in extravaganza.

Got no idea what to do with that extra clod polish in the garage? Are you a billionaire casting about for something eccentric to spend your money on? Ever wanted to listen to a game of charades? Then this is the episode for you!

The origins of the Charlie Horse and other painful dances, a call from Helsinki, and Professor Heimberg's haunted teletype machine.

An episode about the Leibig (a real jerk of a creature), the Afghani kite parade, Pamphleteers and, of course, the Glosenthrax Dilemna.