Our Watch Has Ended: A Game Of Thrones Hatewatch

Our Long National Nightmare is OVER folks! We pew pew pew one more time with our Li'l Finger News Bulletin (spoiler alert, it's a Menzies!), our gripes, some feelings about the ups and downs of the entire season, some thoughts on feminism, and our Jon Snow impersonation. All men must die, except when they don't and become the king instead. Thanks for the the last few seasons!

Well friends, we've made it to the penultimate episode of this godforsaken show and Kirstie may never stop fuming. We've got gripes, we've got Fast and the Furious motion smoothing sequels (2 Fast 2 Slow 2 Sharp 2 Smooth), and we've even got plot twists involving sneezes and ants. We'll also update y'all on our fantasy league and make predictions for the final episode (spoiler alert: Samwell Tarly is gonna write a Coke ad). One more episode 'til our long national nightmare is finally over!

We survived the longest night, and awoke to yet another very long night. A long night of bad Grand Romantic Gestures. A long night of Dick Jokes. And mostly, the kind of night that just makes you talk about Harry Potter and Outlander instead of the show you're contractually obligated by the bonds of hobbyist podcasting to recap every week. We discuss problematic couplings like Harry and Hermione, Ron and Hermione, Harry and Cho, oh and I guess some of the Westeros gang gets their dicks wet too. We have updates to the Fantasy League, as well as detailed gripes, and a remarkably stiff competition for Who Was Petty This Week.

We watched the Battle of Winterfell so you don't have to! Seriously, you don't have to... it was dumb. Join us as we celebrate the Daves' finer phrasing choices, the variety of ways we have continued to be #blessed by red filter, and the grand romantic gesture some of us were waiting for. Plus, Star Wars I guess? Stay tuned for next week because apparently more war and petty drama await!

The world's worst sleep over, graduation toasts, sci-fi milk alternatives, and our One True Dad. We hit a lot of beats this week and very little actual plot. Find out who won the Petty This Week award in a crowded field of petty bitches, catch a brief update from the Li'l Finger News Bulletin, and listen to Kirstie complain for the 900th time about time in the Game of Thrones universe. If you haven't already, this is your last week to prepare your fantasy team and catch up on ours, the Battle of Winterfell is coming!

Game of Thrones returned last night and we're bringing you a lengthy song of our vomit over terrible dialogue, attempts at comedy, and Scrawny Dave's many thoughtful words. We've also got Planet Coaster thoughts, rom com thoughts, and (obviously) Outlander thoughts, so join us in pettiness for the season 8 premiere.

We're all about to be in the same place at the same time for the same purpose! That's right, Game of Thrones returns tonight and we are filled with dread. Join us as we preview Season 8 (spoilers abound?). We'll catch up on what we remember (incest babies, Bad Jamie, Samwell Tarly's independent study) and what we don't (who exactly is Melisandre?), PLUS we reveal our Fantasy League heading into the final season. Get ready because the Dick Count begins TONIGHT!

It's been two years, but we are back at it with our favorite garbage show! Don't gaslight us about great houses, it's been a long time! As the hype builds, so do the brand partnerships, so we wanted to take a minute to talk about some of the crazy ways HBO has licensed Game of Thrones to trick you into BLEEDING FOR THE BRANDS. We discuss Oreo, Shake Shack, the American Red Cross, Mountain Dew, Urban Decay, Love Pop, Rolling Pins, Johnny Walker, and Spotify. How many houses are there? How do you fit a house on a cookie? Are we in Snowdonia? We are back on our bullshit, bringing the HOT LOOKS and HOT TAKES and dear god are we ready for this season to be over. Use the hashtag #hatewatchGOT to watch along with us! This episode is only about licensing deals and has no spoilers (in theory, but who knows?)

We've had a lot of fun this season, from our discount liquor store wine to our discount liquor store plot. This Sunday, we're starting with the Li'l Finger News Bulletin. We include an important update on the Game of Thrones Fantasy League, have as many gripes as we found Dick Jokes, recap some sexy times and guess who will end up being Classroom Mom in Westeros. What's in store for next season? Who tf knows because next season won't air until 2017823098. Stay tuned though, because when the time comes for us all to come back to the same place at the same time, we will be ready to be here for the same purpose. Keep hashtagging #hatewatchgot in the meantime!

We start this episode in Westeros Middle School and end this episode in a lizard uterus because all things in this show come full circle except for plot. It's the second to last episode of season 7 and it's tough to be 13 years old and running a kingdom during a zombie apocalypse. We've got all the hot gossip like Tyrion passing notes to Jon for Dany, Tormund trying to get Brienne to go to the dance with him, Li'l Finger stoking the fear of his li'l finger, and Westeros finally got a mall for everyone to hang out in! Also, Arya totally made it personal when she offended our knitting, so girl can take her silicon faces and shove them right up her Fossil briefcase. Good news though! The dick jokes are back, Kelsey is still looking for the RomCom and we have some quick updates on the fantasy teams. Join us next week for the FINAL EPISODE of the season and as always, live tweet with #hatewatchgot

We're all here at the same time for the same purpose (aka, back from vacation), and we're so DICKON for the next episode of Game of Thrones that we decided it was time for some spicy hot surprise bonus content. We're binding off episodes 4 and 5 of Game of Thrones to cleanse ourselves in preparation for episode 6. We've got DICKon jokes, grammar jokes, gripes up the wazu, feelings about Inside the Episode, more Harry Potter crossovers, predictions, and a new boyband. Join us for live tweeting the episode using #hatewatchGOT.

It's Sunday so of course we're checking in on Game of Thrones. The season 6 writers are back with Choose-Your-Own-Adventure dick and grammar jokes, Kelsey Has A Gripe, Li'l Finger and his Li'l Finger pew pew pew their way through the Li'l Finger News Bulletin, Cersai scored at Mac on Free Lipstick Day, we have our first point in our Fantasy Draft, and Policy Wonks win the episode in both Dragonstone and Winterfell. Cross over universes this week included the Grand Designs tour of Dany's Bespoke Dragonstone Throne, Bran Potter and the Goblet of Winterfell, House of (Ice and Fire) Cards, and The Office. Sorry, there were no funny puns for that one. We also jumped aboard the #noconfederate bandwagon.

We're back at it with episode two of season who the fuck knows! This week we got grammar lessons as plot devices, Dany and Tyrion gave us a Grand Designs cross over, Arya and Hot Pie gave us a Great British Bake Off cross over, we were treated to Varys Story Time, Arya met a Hyppogriff, The Greyjoys bought some fireworks at a New Hampshire liquor store and brought them on the Pirates of the Caribbean ride, Theon recreated THAT scene from the Titanic, Sam is brewing polygjuice potion to cure Sir Friendzone's gonorrhea, and Jon looks like a bowl of vanilla ice cream. It's a high stakes game of sibling rivalries, stray pets, and alternative cross-over universes, complete with grammar lessons, dick-less jokes, and food that looks like STDs. Oh, and the Li'l Finger News Bulletin is coming in hot, perhaps foreshadowing the outcome of our Fantasy League, so get ready to place your bets on the House Snark's JV team!

Winter has come for House Hatewatch. We rejoined our forlorn ensemble cast and our lost and lonely writers for yet another season of Game of Thrones. Though to be honest, we might have been watching Harry Potter. We weren't sure. We've got our Official Dick Joke Count, the Airing of Grievances, the Li'l Finger News Bulletin, and an introduction to our fantasy teams - House Snark and Valar Prestigious. Tune in every Sunday night for our 15 minute recaps and updates, and feel free to live tweet along with us using the hashtag #hatewatchGOT. We are members of the Thought Bubble Audio Network. Find us at: www.thoughtbubbleaudio.com @thoughtbubblefm www.hatewatchwithus.com @hatewatchwitus

Jump in the Way-Back Machine to Summer of 2017 when Game of Thrones was airing Season 7, the Daves still had a production timeline, Kelsey was still operating with janky audio, and Hatewatch With Us did their very first Game of Thrones bind off episode! In this episode, Kirstie and Kelsey try desperately to remember what show they're watching, aimlessly recap the previous seasons of the show, and drop some teasers for the season to come. Stay with us over the next few weeks to see the reactions to each week's episode and the season bind off! New episodes will start with the season premier in April!

Our Watch Has Ended is a Game of Thrones recap podcast, guarenteed to be the only one counting the dicks in every episode. Join us this season as we revisit season 7 with old recaps every week until April 14th, then tune in for real time recaps of Season 8! Catch up with the results of last year's Game of Thrones Fantasy League at our website, hatewatchwithus.com!