DISTRACTED AND AGGRESSIVE

Realllly hit a stride this week -- We set out to record an ep about Mother's Day that included interviews with our moms BUT WE NEVER GOT THERE... because we are, categorically, distracted and aggressive. So instead today's topics include: Web MD, dog boners, husbands who are good at Insta (not OUR husbands), zombie almond milk, things not to say on a 1st date, flat warts, Siri, David's stupid clothes, 6th grade sports bras, activated charcoal, and Elmo.

A quick hit on some important topics. Namely: farts on planes and self-imposed social media time restrictions

A mom’s trash is a kid’s art… if your kid is a hoarder, Ang just can’t help being so… sexy?, #tagsinclothes, #Anghatestagsinclothes, #Enoughtotalkaboutitforalmostawholeepisode

How did Sally and Angelique become friends? It's in today's episode... ALSO in today's ep: David brought GREAT snacks for once, Ang is legally blind, Sally has a fear of creepy dolls, and Voodoo is alive and well.  

Back in the swing of things, Ang and Sally go deep on casual weed usage, bird alarm clocks, parenting class judgments, being jealous of bilingual babies, and the pitfalls of social media. 

It's been awhile and so much and also nothing has changed - Sally had a baby, Angelique's baby is ready to potty train, David is still trying to get the microphones set up correctly. After berating David for letting the podcast wane away, Sally and Ang jump into the deep end of Pellegrino vs LaCroix, Ang's cartoon shark bedroom eyes, and wiping kids' butts. Welcome back.

Our favorite guest that we have EVER HAD on the show! Nevermind that she's our first, Sarah comes on and brings truth, zest, laughter, and (even though it's a podcast) some real hot leather short shorts. Topics include: kids, sometimes not liking your kids, working with your spouse, a shocking revelation about Angelique's SAT score, Sally's berating of Sarah for wearing said leather short shorts, buying your first bra, and Robert Altman.

I LOVE BEING WRONG, said no one ever. Also, dealing with clutter, dentists, laundry, packing, and people who own Droids. (Producer's note: Droid phones are great); (Sally and Angelique's note: No they're not)  

C Sections, Strawberries, Chiggers. Also, David adjusts the microphones pretty much the entire show.

Text etiquette, future plans are made for flaking, signs Sally wants you to leave her house, the romance of messiness, raising a good kid in a buy-everything world, and... diarrhea. Oh, also Angelique doesn’t know her dog's bday.

Boobs out, post-preg clothing woes, Vegas residencies, "oh my God" vs "oh my gosh" vs "oh my gahhh", and a deep dive into the shallow end of #abbreviations, oh and JASON (Ang's husband) accidentally calls in!

Ang dated a Mormon hemophiliac boogey border, Sally’s college boyfriend puked on her so she stole his shirt. Also: was I cool in college? no? are kids exhausting? yeah? Do scientists have more interesting social media feeds? probably.

Topics: Bathroom Talk, whole lotta bathroom talk, starting with toddler jacuzzi pee, ending with couples poop-etiquette. Also, when is food too bad to eat? Kimchi on airplanes, spouses who hoard, and of course, snacks.

Topics: vag lifts, too much insta too little time, Damian Lewis breathes loudly, love/hate for Lumosity, don't F with pregnant ladies, fishing for sponsors, word games, buying rope... returning rope

Note: recorded when Ang was still pregnant Topics: Lot to say about dried fruit, hiding garbage from your spouse, exploiting amnesia, possible sponsors, more about dried fruit, gefilte fish, goat cheese, gorilla regurgitation and stalking Alicia Silverstone

Now we're cooking. Topics: Problems with Motorcycles, Cuban Baby Cologne, Spider bites, “Pincer” or “Pincher”, Scary Looking Crickets, and maybe a little farting.

Angelique and Sally (with the help of producer/Sally's husband David) stumble headfirst into their first episode. Topics: what should this podcast be called, the importance of snacks, Angelique's need for wet feet, hornets vs bees, snacks.