5 Birds And A Mic

It's the final epsiode of the season! The birds are way too busy with the shop now, but they will be back sometime after peak season. And what an epsiode to go out on! This is the funniest and wildest one in a long time. Enjoy.

G is Snow White in her new p***y wagon, Timmy needs milking, Emma is a Sheff Sophia Loren in a Fellini film and Meg's muscles ache because of mashed potato.

No Emily this week so G takes the wheel of this increasingly wayward ship. The birds discuss which lockdown habits they will take with them back into real life, their levels of anxiety about going out again, and Meg reveals what crafty hobby she's started doing in her parents bedroom.

The birds are done with this, Emma is coming back from Italian ski heaven, G's done with Meghan Markle's bs and Meg's just stright up done with it all.

This week the birds perve on Rob, hate on Claudia Winkleman and Andrew gets triggered by Something Special.

Emma is really truely happy and ovulating, G's hair is having a Great day, and Meg's got a new car and the birds figure out the perfect nickname for it, because they're nice like that... 5 Birds And A mic is a lifestyle/comedy podcast brought to you by the birds at Emily Bridal Wear; a bridal boutique in the heart of Sheffield, UK. They talk about everything from current affairs, to business, to motherhood. It's real, it's rude, sometimes it's really rude (..Georgina) put the kids to bed, pour a glass of red and have a giggle. Follow us on Instagram and Twitter @5birdsandamic

Emily is missing the competition of netball so she's racing against her poo, Emma tells an hilarious story about her sweet baby girl and the girls go through Meg's jewellery box with savage and hilarious consequences.

They're flagging, we're all flagging, I went to put the eldest to bed last night and fell asleep at 7:30pm, woke up at 6am. Enough about me, Emma now has a dual aspect view of a snow covered castle and a vineyard, the bitch.

This one's a hall of famer, featuring: My favourite G rant ever, Emily's brand new dated tiles and Emma's dramatic nipples.

You know you've had a good new years when you wake up to a good old fashioned visit from some specialist carpet cleaners, Meg. Emily's in her bath and G's in her ready-made family, without the nasty pregnancy and whatnot. 5 Birds And A mic is a lifestyle/comedy podcast brought to you by the birds at Emily Bridal Wear; a bridal boutique in the heart of Sheffield, UK. They talk about everything from current affairs, to business, to motherhood. It's real, it's rude, sometimes it's really rude (..Georgina) put the kids to bed, pour a glass of red and have a giggle.

In a pretty out of character heartfelt episode, the birds share their new years resolutions - generally speaking a lot of 'care less about everything's. I think that's a message we can all get behind. Here's to a belter of a 2021, it can't get much worse.

Emily's daughter might be a psycho, how do we know? She's done the most evil thing I can think of: she'd been stealing her brothers advent calender chocolate. Is Emily punishing her? No, she's proud. Cool. Well we'll see how that plays out for you. Emily.

Great episode, good energy. This is 5BAAM after dark, shot during the evening without our single parent Em, the birds are cold and feeling extra inhibition-free. And we finally get stuck into what we're having for dinner.

Meg breakdown her 3 flannel wash technique, things are getting real in the Georgina household and everything's turning up Emma (like Milhouse, it's a simpsons reference).

Back in lockdown, absolute mayhem, Meggy is settling into her Sheffield version of Friends, George is going full bore at getting wifed up.

Behold the epic tale of Meggy's midnight poo! We laugh but this is probably a serious issue, but what do you want from us? Sympathy? Empathy and concern? It's a pandemic! The wedding sector is getting crushed by lockdown, what else can we do? Except laugh at the misfortunes of our beautiful yet ..'quirky' shall we say, Meg.

The birds play a series of poorly organised hen-do games, we find out who Emily's favourite employee is, who's the best looking, who's got the highest body count, and what Emily's next husband is going to be like. It's a wild one.

While Emily is away the birds will play, producer Andrew brings his awkward energy and hosts the most random episode yet. Get ready for Meg to put her foot in it like never before, Andrew is a crabby donut in Thailand and again Meg reveals her ignorance of processed meat.

Everything is different now, there's a new intro, Georgina is settling down and two of their families have literally been torn asunder.

I thought the podcast needed a bit more estrogen so I stepped in to soften things up, smash the matriarchy, boy did I regret it. Couldn't get a bloody word in.

And then there were four... Please join us in our special tribute to one of the most special birds ever to grace Ecclesall road, she's not from New York City she worked at Hunters Bar... Our long serving Dan is flying the nest for pastures new, so it's with champagne And tissues we celebrate the best bits of Danielle.

Emma experiences her own dark night of soul in this one, a betrayal of Judas Iscarioteen proportions. Late on in the episode producer Andrew, the dirty snake in the grass, sets off a chain of events that culminates in almost ripping the Birds asunder. Brought to you by Mowgli's on Ecclesall Road.

The birds are back! In the studio after a little break they are back with a vengence. Emily ugly cries down the rubber dingy rapids, G gets very high at the eyebrow salon, and Meg has a lovely suprise for us all...

Our WAG in residence, from being barely dressed outside a bar in Maga to flogging dresses in hunters bar, she's got two mental kids but remains as cool as a cucumber (or is she fuming we can't tell sometimes), Our Sheffield swan, she'll Steel-ya heart - Emma!!!

The birds are super busy at the shop, which is great because that means I'll get paid finally right? Their cheques keep bouncing so hopefully this means I'll get paid. I haven't seen them for a while so I haven't been able to confirm that but I guess I'll just keep making these and they'll send a BACS or something. Come to think of it they've never asked me for my bank account details...

Welcome to Meggy's Moments episode one! To be honest, I only went back to episode 21 and there was already a full ep of content so this really is episode 1 of many. Anyway, 5BAAM every monday, tell a friend.

Hilarious episode about Things You Wish You Could Un-see, all horrific, all things I wish I could un-hear, I want to talk to HR, why doesn't this podcast have HR? Apparently I'm not on staff, might explain why I haven't been paid yet. Andrew x.

Bird rules. We discuss vitally important personal rules about toilet roll direction, the numbers of layers of foundation, vaping and crisp packets openings. Also Meg's humming tourette's, we talk about that a lot too.

The birds discuss their awkward and embarrassing cover up's, spiders in dresses, Meg's devious manipulation of her poor bf, and trust Emily to bring the ep to a screeching halt with one of her grossest stories yet..

Emma flashes a kids pool, Meg accidentally sanitises her foo foo and Emily leaves a tide of piss on the train.   5 Birds And A mic is a lifestyle/comedy podcast brought to you by the birds at Emily Bridal Wear; a bridal boutique in the heart of Sheffield, UK. They talk about everything from current affairs, to business, to motherhood. It's real, it's rude, sometimes it's really rude (..Georgina) put the kids to bed, pour a glass of red and have a giggle.

Tell your friends to start with this one, it's amazing. Who'd have thought simple bridal shop assistants would have so much faecal fascination and so much murderous intent? Dan's on the facebook portal and Andrew is getting a bit to familiar if you ask me...

The current state of lock down is like going to a sh*t disney everywhere you go. - Shakespeare? Dickens? Actually this is a direct quote from our Emma. G rants about queues a lot in this one and it's fantastic. And also Emily says “I love b@ll@cks” at one point.

The Birds are back in the nest!!! It's all a bit weird, they give away all their passwords, Emily finds out about the secret WhatsApp group and Meg doesn't know which way is up, literally.

Like that one Friends episode the one with all the clips The One with All the Other Ones… the Birds recall their favourite bits so far, in one of the most laugh out loud episodes yet.

The birds get deep and meaningful about what they'd say to their 18yr old selves. Also, more weird crushes, Em has an epiphany about Gaston and Meg wants to get A-Lad-In (Aladdin).

Trigger warning, NSFL warning, this ep is highly inappropriate and should not be consumed by anyone you have been warned. Long story short, Emily doesn't use tampons anymore. Also Meg reveals her dastardly methods of manipulation, poor poor Brad...

So the corona virus started with cruises, airports, ski resorts, why does it hate middle class white people so much? I feel personally attacked. Lots of love Andrew x. Also the girls do rants, and G destroys!

You know when you really need a wee really bad but then you fart and it gives you like an extra 5-10mins of wiggle room? Is it that they're stored in adjacent compartments? I'm not a scientist, but I do have a BA Hons in Film Studies which is equally as meaningful to my parents who disowned me. Andrew x.

Did you know your feet are the same length as your forearm? Meg didn't. And did you know that ghosts are real? And everyone has dyed their hair. 5 Birds And A mic is a lifestyle/comedy podcast brought to you by the birds at Emily Bridal Wear; a bridal boutique in the heart of Sheffield, UK. They talk about everything from current affairs, to business, to motherhood. It's real, it's rude, sometimes it's really rude (..Georgina) put the kids to bed, pour a glass of red and have a giggle.

Like an overfamiliar aunt with substance abuse problem at Christmas the birds give horrible, R-rated advice for an hour. It ends with hysterics over a technical issue... 5 Birds And A mic is a lifestyle/comedy podcast brought to you by the birds at Emily Bridal Wear; a bridal boutique selling weddings dresses in the heart of Sheffield, UK. They talk about everything from current affairs, to business, to motherhood. It's real, it's rude, sometimes it's really rude (..Georgina) put the kids to bed, pour a glass of red and have a giggle.

Most likely to be up late Sunday night working on the video description because I have to entertain a 4 year old all day? That's Andrew the producer. Hi. So the Birds play 'most likely to' and it's really chill and funny. 5 Birds And A Mic is a lifestyle/comedy podcast brought to you by the birds at Emily Bridal Wear; a bridal boutique in the heart of Sheffield, UK. It's like an 18 rated Loose Women. They talk about everything from current affairs, to business, to motherhood. It's real, it's rude, sometimes it's really rude (..Georgina). So put the kids to bed, pour a glass of red, and have a giggle.

The birds get the latest lumberjack update, G is mean to Meg and it's hilarious and everyone hates spiders.

This one was a public service announcement to mothers who are homeschooling your kids, stop! You're making us look bad, we don't want to see your soaked oats either! Also featuring mains powered vibrators.

Inspired by the free month subscription of Disney+ (the real Robin Williams Aladdin) the birds reveal what their 3 wishes would be, hi-jinx ensue...

Listeners mail - whether you're team Floppy Thong or a Full Brief Bird there's something for everyone in this hilarious episode

Chaos ensues as the podcast is crashed by a load of kids, Dan's a nerd, G's a perve and Emma's just gagging for a cigarette.

The Birds bring us their unpopular opinions, super controversial points of view on cat-calling, Nutella, Ed Sheeran and ...intimate grooming.

The birds get stuck into some juicy male celebs (for a change), G plans the first podcast wedding and magicians get some stick (wand?), again. Honestly though, this is a really good one!

The birds tell each other their dream dinner guests, Emma goes low-brow, George goes high-brow and Emily is just plain nosey.

The birds play two truths and a lie, because they are grown-up  adults, and we find out the following: which 2 birds have webbed feet, and which bird was bombed by a terrorist militant group and a former unrecognised proto-state.

This was a wild one. Dan's been spiking kids, we find out who started the hand sanitiser shortage and Emma answers the question; "how do you wee in a jumpsuit?'