She Hasn't Seen This Yet

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This episode was recorded at Christmas, when things were brighter and less terrifying. In this episode, Abbey and I discuss invisible rabbis, wigs in general, how everyone in Superman's world is an idiot, and how Karli is, unsurprisingly, against consumerism. "Stargate" also comes up.

In this episode, we discuss The Giver, "Thor", and orc-eology. We also sometimes discuss "Stargate".

In this episode, Abbey and Karli go on a full-on rant where we mention Bill Nye, Karli's brief foray into the film industry, the one good season of "Teen Wolf" and if Colin Morgan is doing okay. We also complain about this episode.

In this very quiet, awkward episode where other people are in the other room and we are interrupted by babies, dogs, and kittens, Abbey and Karli discuss nail polish bravery, Thor's safeword, and the fact that Abbey played Kili in a Hobbit musical once. We also talk about Stargate.

In the new kalimba-powered episodes, we talk about Dorothy the Tok'ra, Abbey's safeword, Karli's hot take on Stephen King, and being alone in an amusement park! We also talk about Stargate.

In this episode we talk about Thor: Ragnorok (again), Karli's broken wrist, our favorite blank wall Tabitha, and measuring time by Taylor Swift albums. We also talk about this episode.

In this episode, we discuss prime Judy Blume time, being genetically Quaker, and owning late stage capitalism. We also discuss Stargate SG-1.

In this episode Abbey and Karli are finally back (and not very funny) to talk about the varying levels of 'oh fuck', some Thanos shit, and bringing it back to Twilight.

Don't you just wanna scream in a group? Don't you just wanna collapse to the floor? Why do people take their shoes off in airplanes? Do all Australians sound the same? These and other important questions answered in this episode where we don't talk about Stargate all that much.

In this episode we discuss My Dad Wrote a Porno, Big Brother, self-sabotaging and things we had to unlearn. We also ocassionally discuss the episode.

In this week's episode, Abbey and Karli discuss fast food stories, apartments with doormen, being haunted by Hannah Montana and fizzy drinks. We also discuss this episode.

In this episode, we discuss spaghettification, John Mulaney quotes, the fact that Abbey doesn't know what a tank looks like and read our first piece of fanmail! We also occasionally discuss "Stargate".

In this episode, Abbey and Karli discuss Good Will Hunting-ing your friends, what hippies sound like, and literally fighting Satan. We also occasionally discuss this episode.

In this episode, Abbey and I discuss the Writer's Strike, Abbey's Minnesota accent, and how we remember "The Sound of Music" differently. We also discuss this episode.

In this episode, Abbey and Karli discuss if we think this episode is racist, hating Orson Scott Card, a Thousand Moms Against Heretics, and #NotAllJaffa. We also discuss this episode.

In this episode we discuss hurdy-gurdys, how Glee was Abbey's life, space racism, and what the Queen would think. We also occasionally, discuss "Stargate"

In this episode, Karli gives a TEDTalk about biopics she would like to see, we discuss Chuck E. Cheese birthdays, "the youth", and how important noses are. We also occasionally talk about Stargate.

We're back! And in this episode we discuss being gay at art shows, "what are frogs?", and liking it when you call us Big Papa. We also discuss "Stargate". This episode was recorded all the way back in July 2018. We're sorry.

I lied--apparently we had a few crappy audio podcasts left. Sorry. In this episode we discuss good morning texts from Bra'tac, no secret rooms, Monopoly, and Abbey's low voice. We also discuss "Stargate".

In this episode, Abbey & Karli discuss Abbey's recurring dreams, big pharma, the flawed logic of the climax of Jurassic Park: The Lost World, and welcoming death. We also talk about Stargate on occasion.

In this episode (alternatively titled "Two Girls, One Archeaologist"), Abbey has taken a lot of Dayquil and it presents itself in a sleepy but giddy personality. We discuss Spartacus, Jaffa shofars, and how there's always time for mythology.

In this episode (which is the origin of our alternative cast!) we still have poor audio but we are way funnier than the last episode. Abbey and I discuss Sam's Spidey Sense, the fact that there are no metaphors in space, Jonathan Taylor Thomas hair, and unions. We also discuss "Stargate".

In this episode, Abbey and Karli discuss Epcot, a museum Karli hasn't been to because it doesn't exist, being Cisco'd and Tom Holland doing flips or something. We also discuss this episode which was recorded prior to us being better at audio, so, like, sorry.

In this episode, Karli and Abbey discuss cannibalism, Abbey's inability to whistle, Karli's deep hate of "In the Heart of the Sea", and the noodle dance. We also, occasionally, discuss "Stargate".

In this episode, Karli and Abbey are joined by special guests An Obnoxious Drilling Noise, Mic Issues, and McGonagall the Cat. They discuss Tony Stark's character arc, the Sandlot, and then Tony Stark's character arc again. They also occasionally discuss this episode.

In this episode, Abbey and Karli are joined by Thad and Stuart of "Stargate Weekly" to discuss Elizabeth Olsen being the best Olsen twin, Goa'uld soap operas, Apophis's cheekbones, and salting your phone. We also occasionally discuss "Stargate".

In the season 1 finale, Abbey and Karli are joined by Stuart and Thad of "Stargate Weekly" to discuss 90s reality shows, "Holes" and Nicholas Cage. We also discuss the finale.

In which Karli and Abbey probably made some real good jokes, but since this recording, Karli has got a second job and is literally dying slowly of exhaustion and has no idea what we said in this, and only edited half of it. Also we talk about "Stargate".

In this episode, we discuss Mary Kate and Ashley, the feminist and social justice aspects of "Holes", and giving your kids coffee. We also discuss Stargate occasionally.

In this episode, we talk about Old Yeller's theme song, country music, reverse psychology and Carlos Valdes as the man who breaks your hand. We also occasionally discuss "Stargate".

Abbey and Karli discuss they're vastly different childhoods, baldeagleinfo.com, burb bird murder, and bad Hulk impressions. Also we talk about "Stargate".

In our second re-recorded episode, Abbey reminisces about first grade, Karli brings up Kirk vs. Spock fights, we both remind you that this podcast is strongly anti-Nazi, and do our gay diligence. Also, Stargate is occasionally discussed.

In this episode, Karli and Abbey forgo discussions about an actual episode and instead take a deep dive into an overly meta discussion on story, characters, and their deeply involved imaginary reboot.

In this episode, Karli admits her Halloweentown shame, Abbey stans Teal'c, and both of us talk a lot about CW shows. We don't talk much about Stargate--what else is new?

In this episode, Karli f*cks up, we thank the straights for their tireless work in being the norm in 90s media, and consider shrimp cocktails. We also rarely talk about "Stargate" because, honestly, this just became an awkward PSA episode where both Karli and Abbey were slightly uncomfortable the whole time.

In this episode Abbey finally admits that Daniel is a bit sexy and discusses her high school acting career, and Karli does some solid 1930s gangster impression. We also talk about Stargate a bit.

In this episode, we reference "My Immortal", verbal ellipses, childhood illnesses, and we see the return of our Disney podcast. Also, we discuss "Stargate" a bit.

In this episode we talk about cool grandmas, and smooth jazz before Abbey spirals briefly into sadness. We also sometimes discuss this episode.

An episode in which Karli does a Fruedian slip, we talk about chopping people's heads off, and how special snowflake Daniel needs to follow his heart. Also we discuss the episode.

In this episode we discuss theoretical jokes, Karli's weird amount of research, "The Dark Crystal", and our thesis about Daniel-as-the-female-character. This is a longer episode, use it for you car trips! Enjoy the movie!

In this episode we talk about how much drugs our parents may have done, flowercrowns, Tatiana Maslany, and f*cking guns. We also occasionally talk about "Stargate SG-1".

In which we embrace the superlative of "most disorganized", we discuss getting caught up in the crossfire, the benefits of Cheez Whiz, Mexican stand-offs, and agree that nothing is sacred. Also "Stargate" is discussed.

In this episode, we talk about how time isn't real, discuss #treatyoself and Daniel's 89 wives, and Karli says the word "aesthetic" a lot. We also talk about this episode of season 8. What happened to season 1, you ask? Good question. Please refer to the title of this episode and save all other questions 'til the end.

In this episode, we watch "The Nox", a obnoxiously circling plot of an episode--with chill moss people! In our podcast, Abbey shares here football knowledge, we "Begin invisible man search!", discuss "The Neverending Story" and occasionally talk about the episode.

In which everything is schmaltzy, we discuss our existential crises, and Abbey's hazy knowledge of both Star Wars and the Bible is briefly explored. We also discuss "Stargate SG-1" a bit.

You thought you were listening to a podcast about Stargate SG-1, but this quickly just devolves into a podcast where we talk Disney instead. That's sort of the same thing, right?

Abbey and Karli have a really lazy, comfy podcast while talking about cavemen, Abbey's favorite concept album, Karli's bisexuality, and, occasionally, this episode.

Abbey and Karli delve into episode 3! It's all about girl power and women's lib and #feminism!

Episode two! Includes: minor technical difficulties, our anxiety, and the start of Abbey over-analyzing everything.

Karli and Abbey discuss the "Stargate SG-1" pilot, including terrible audio, a Karli-Abbey sandwich, spoiling Dumbledore's death, a discussion on how Abbey's never seen any movies, Karli singing the lyrics to the theme song, "Daniel is bae", Karli being gayer than she originally thought, and Daniel's minor in dance.