Turn to Page Fun | By Sexy Hackers Clothing

Our search for the Yeti kicks into high gear as the BEST bureaucrat in Nepal, R.N. Runal joins our expedition. Are you, the Protagonist, ready to learn the true mystery of the Yeti? Don't worry, you'll get plenty of chances to change your mind! Plus we give our final thoughts on the book so curl up with a steaming cup of Yak-butter tea and help us decide if it was all worth it, friends Brian Bayer (Ampersand Theater, No Dice) Jacob Woelful, and Jo Montana (SoHiDo Vinylworks).

We continue our search for the Abominable Snowman by R.A. Montgomery! This time we leave Carlos to his fate and find out what happens in the exciting world of the Nepalize Permitting Office. Do we dare explore the jungles of Terai while we wait for our Yeti-hunting paperwork to go through? Find out on this thrilling episode filled with silly voices and famous tigers! friends Brian Bayer (Ampersand Theater, No Dice) Jacob Woelful, and Jo Montana (SoHiDo Vinylworks).

This week we begin our search for the Abominable Snowman by R.A. Motgomery! You, the Protagonist, after months of mountain climbing experience have decided to go on an expedition to the Himalayas in search of the fabled Yeti. Can you, the Protagonist, find these mysterious, majestic creatures before your friend, Carlos, does everything he can to get in your way? We find out with friends Brian Bayer (Ampersand Theater, No Dice) Jacob Woelful, and Jo Montana (SoHiDo Vinylworks).

We hop in the basket one last time to take a trip By Balloon to the Sahara!! We find out what happens when we tell a Tuppence to f*ck off and go where WE want to go. Then we stop EVERYTHING to learn a little more about FONTS!!!!! Plus, our final thoughts on the book and its author -- who turns out to be pretty great. With friends Harry Loefler Bell (Harrylb.com), Brian Bayer (No Dice, Ampersand Theater), and Amanda Washkun (Uncle Fergus Magic Whiskey Band) Join us next Monday for a new book! Be sure to subscribe so you don't miss any future episodes. #CYOA #letsread #turntopagefun

Let's read! Do you remember the awesome "you choose the story" books like Choose Your Own Adventure, Which Way Books, and Twist-a-Plot from the 1970s and 1980s? Milwaukee comedian Nick Firer (VHHH, No Dice) explores multiple storylines from each of these treasured-yet-quirky paperbacks with help from a rotating panel of friends, comedians, and so-and-so's. Subscribe to our channel for nostalgic readings, amusing commentary, and in-depth reviews every Monday! You can also listen to the show on our podcast page here: https://turntopagefun.sexyhackers.tv/ BY BALLOON TO THE SAHARA PART 2: BEHIND THE WHITE DOOR We are back and still traveling By Balloon to the Sahara by D. Termin!!! After agreeing to help those aliens get that sweet, sweet salt, you, the protagonist, take a jump to the left into a time warp? We think? Then there's a cave with the classic three-door dilemma. But which will you, the protagonist, choose? Take a swig of milk and a leap of faith to find out what's next. With friends Harry Loefler Bell (Harrylb.com), Brian Bayer (No Dice, Ampersand Theater), and Amanda Washkun (Uncle Fergus Magic Whiskey Band) Join us next Monday for Part 3! Be sure to subscribe so you don't miss any future episodes. #CYOA #letsread #turntopagefun

This week we climb up into a rented dirigible with our two best friends, a dog named Harry, and a jug of milk to go By Balloon to the Sahara by D. Termin!!! Oh No!!! A storm is coming!!! Are You, the protagonist going to try to land or are You going to ride it out? Only one way to find your fate this time around! Who knows it might land you in the Mediterranean where you can choose to just give up and die! With friends Harry Loefler Bell (Harrylb.com), Brian Bayer (No Dice, Ampersand Theater) and Amanda Washkun (Uncle Fergus Magic Whiskey Band).

We take one more ride on the Superbike by Edward Packard. It turns out that the Air-magnet (patent pending) which makes the superbike work has some abilities we didn't know about. No need to leave it to a professional to test them out, we are sure You, the protagonist, can handle the test drive without a hitch. After that, we can take it on the Tour USA and see if it's enough to help us cheat, er, ride our way to victory!! Plus we give our own thoughts on the book. With friends Brian Bayer (Ampersand Theater, No Dice) Stacy Pawlowski (No Dice, Dinner Detective) and Brian Green (Comedy Sportz)

This week, we hop right back on Superbike by Edward Packard. After getting our bike stolen at bike camp, friends Brian Bayer (Ampersand Theater, No Dice) Stacy Pawlowski (No Dice, Dinner Detective) and Brian Green (Comedy Sportz) decide to learn what happens when you, The Protagonist, take the superbike out for a test drive in the Tour New England! Is the superbike enough to make you win? Or will you get lost along the way? Only one way to find out!

This week we start our review of Superbike by Edward Packard. When you, The Protagonist, finds a wallet in the movie theater, you decide to return it. The thankful owner gives you a reward that is even BETTER than money: your very own Superbike!!! Can you, the protagonist, keep it a secret long enough to win the very well publicized Tour USA professional bike race? Find out with friends Brian Bayer (Ampersand Theater, No Dice) Stacy Pawlowski (No Dice, Dinner Detective) and very special guest Brian Green (Comedy Sportz). Join us next Monday for Part 2 of Superbike! Be sure to subscribe so you don't miss any future episodes.

We take one more trip around the star that is Edward Packard's Space Vampire. You, the Protagonist, Codename: Osprey, have made all the right moves and haven't been drummed out of what we are pretty sure is the Space SS...yet. But if you do capture that pesky Space Vampire, is he really as evil as he seems? YES! Plus our final thoughts and review! With Brian Bayer (No Dice, Ampersand Theater), Stacy Pawloski (Mad Science, Dinner Detective) and Ron Swanson (Rev. Ron's Movie Blog, Variety Hour Happy Hour).

We zoom back to Space Vampire by Edward Packard in the state of the art K-1 spacecraft! After getting kicked out of what we are pretty sure is the Space SS for not being absolutely perfect in every way, you, The Protagonist, Code-name: Osprey, decide to steal this prototype rocket and continue your mission to save the crew of the freighter "Petya" from the titular Space Vampire. But are you and your new friend, the knife wielding teenager Laurie, any match? Find out this week with friends Brian Bayer (No Dice, Ampersand Theater), Stacy Pawloski (Mad Science, Dinner Detective) and Ron Swanson (Rev. Ron's Movie Blog, Variety Hour Happy Hour)

This week we go all the way to the near future to fight a Space Vampire by Edward Packard. You, The Protagonist, Code-name: Osprey, have just graduated from the Space Academy on Mars. Your first mission: to hunt down the elusive and very real Space Vampire...OR...you could just f**k off and investigate this boring old Barnard's Star System. Which do you think our friends Brian Bayer (No Dice, Ampersand Theater), Stacy Pawloski (Mad Science, Dinner Detective) and Ron Swanson (Rev. Ron's Movie Blog, Variety Hour Happy Hour) are gonna pick? The answer may not surprise you.

We return one more time to Terror Island by Tony Kolz! You, The Protagonist, are swept up into a rebellion against the Omicron Masters led by a native islander who couldn’t POSSIBLY speak the Queen’s English! Will you, The Protagonist, succeed, or will you bug out like HEROES do? Plus a heartfelt tribute to all you brave folks in the service and retail industry this season. You all are the TRUE heroes, really, we mean that! With lots of love from guests Brian Bayer (Ampersand Theater, Variety Hour Happy Hour) Laura Holterman (Cabaret Milwaukee, Variety Hour Happy Hour) and special guest Tim Higgins (Red Letter Media, “The Field,” and “Pass Me a Beer”)!

We sail back to Terror Island by Tony Kolz! Your dad’s friend Bill, took you, alone, on a secret mission to investigate the Evil Omicron Corporation for some reason! Now he’s hurt and it’s up to you, The Protagonist, to get valuable intelligence using nothing but your wits and this extra sh*tty map! Watch out for those saber tooth tigers, if their fangs don’t get you, their breath sure will! YUCK! With guests Brian Bayer (Ampersand Theater, Variety Hour Happy Hour) Laura Holterman (Cabaret Milwaukee, Variety Hour Happy Hour) and special guest Tim Higgins (Red Letter Media, “The Field,” and “Pass Me a Beer”)!

Tis the season...to be SCARY!!! That’s right! We have a very special Holiday episode for you today, so curl up with a cup of cocoa while Nick and his friends Brian Beyer (No Dice, Ampersand Theater), Laura Holterman (Who Let Me Read This, Cabaret Milwaukee) and Stacy Pawlowski (Dinner Detective, Mad Science) take you to The Toy Shop of Terror by Laban Carrick Hill. There’s a new toy shop in town and it’s been built around your favorite 215-inch circumference maple tree! Can you, The Protagonist, and your friend Evan learn who would dare start a business around this historic landmark without the proper permits before it’s too late? There’s only one way to find out.

This week we sail away, alone, with your Dad’s work friend to Terror Island by Tony Kolz! You, The Protagonist, are alone on a two-person Pacific Cruise with your Dad’s Friend, Bill Sutherland, for some reason. It isn’t until a mine blows a hole in the side of your ship that you learn Bill is some sort of secret agent and using you for cover? Who cares! It’s time to help this fat KGB Colonel kidnap an old woman!! With guests Brian Bayer (Ampersand Theater, Variety Hour Happy Hour) Laura Holterman (Cabaret Milwaukee, Variety Hour Happy Hour) and special guest Tim Higgins (Red Letter Media, “The Field,” and “Pass Me a Beer”)!

We come back one last time to the 48th hour of The Worst Day of Your Life by Edward Packard, and quite frankly, we are starting to suspect that you, The Protagonist, are the problem. Join guests Brian Bayer (Ampersand Theater, No Dice), Stacy Pawlowski (Mad Science, No Dice), and Ron Swanson (Variety Hour Happy Hour, Rev. Ron's Movie Blog), as we try to navigate you, the protagonist's terrible attitude about the consequences of your own questionable choices. Plus our final thoughts, reviews, and takes hotter than butter on a cinnamon roll, all to recommend whether or not anyone should put themselves through The Worst Day of Your Life.

Things keep getting worse as you, The Protagonist, are experiencing what must be at least the 36th hour of The Worst Day of Your Life by Edward Packard!! This week we jump right back into the action and out of the way of your Uncle Norbert's raging bull! Can you survive Norbert's Farm long enough to get ripped for the coming school year? We find out with friends Brian Bayer With guests Brian Bayer (Ampersand Theater, No Dice), Stacy Pawlowski (Mad Science, No Dice), and Ron Swanson (Variety Hour Happy Hour, Rev. Ron's Movie Blog). Watch out for that Tornado again!!

OH NO! We woke up this week only to find out it was The Worst Day of Your Life by Edward Packard!! After you, The Protagonist, set your neighbor's roof on fire with a rocket, it's no Hawaiian Holiday for you!!! Nope, you gotta go to your Uncle Norbert's Pig Farm for the Summer to pay off the repairs. That is until the bus breaks down, and things only get worse from there, good grief! With guests Brian Bayer (Ampersand Theater, No Dice), Stacy Pawlowski (Mad Science, No Dice), and Ron Swanson (Variety Hour Happy Hour, Rev. Ron's Movie Blog).

The War with the Evil Power Master rages on in this special bonus content episode!! Things get complicated when you, the protagonist, go undercover to track down the Evil Power Master's secret hideout? Is it in the jungle penthouse of this 40 story sphere? Or is it in the abandoned auqua-culture research facility on Pwasonn? Can you find out before Flppto finds out your forgot your anniversary? Find out this week in the thrilling conclusion of our review of The War with the Evil Power Master!!! With guests Brian Bayer (Ampersand Theater, No Dice) and Special Guests Analicia Croker (Bareknuckle Comedy, Boob-gun) and Christian Laurance (Bareknuckle Comedy, History Schmistory) If any of you have links to help us all keep up to date with some of what Christian and Analicia are up to, feel free to comment below!

The War with the Evil Power Master heats up, as You, the protagonist, abandon Space Laws and Space Tradition in a desperate attempt to rendezvous with your cousin, Colin, on the planet Follop. Can You, the protagonist, stop the Evil Power Master from causing more destruction, there's only one way to find out: an exciting duel to the death!!! With Guests Brian Bayer (Ampersand Theater, No Dice), Laura Holterman (VHHH, Shakespeare Raw), and Christian Laurence (Bareknuckle Comedy, History Schmistory). If any of you have links to help us all keep up to date with some of what Christian and Analicia are up to, feel free to comment below!

This week we start a war with the Evil Power Master! You, the protagonist, are a commander in the Lacoonian System Rapid Force! Together with your partner, the Martian Flppto, You, the protagonist scour the galaxy for this intergalactic terrorist. But who is real evil? The Evil Power Master? Or the sprawling intergalactic Lacoonian Empire? Only YOU can be the judge. With Special Guests Brian Bayer (Ampersand Theater, No Dice), Laura Holterman (VHHH, Shakespeare Raw), and Analicia Croker (Bareknuckle Comedy, Boob Gun) If any of you have links to help us all keep up to date with some of what Christian and Analicia are up to, feel free to comment below!

OH NO!!! Our car is just about out of gas!!! Right in front of this spooky mansion! And now, it’s starting to rain! It’s the perfect time to investigate the terrifying events that can only happen at Midnight at Monster Mansion by Steven Otfinoski! That’s right!! We got an extra-long Halloween episode, filled with thrills, chills, imposter TV repairmen, poorly disguised vampires, and dreams of juicy, juicy cheeseburgers! With guests Brian Bayer (Ampersand Theater, No Dice) Laura Holterman (Who Let Me Read This, Variety Hour Happy Hour) and Stacy Pawlowski (No DIce, Mad Science)

We take one last dip into Master of Kung Fu by Richard Brightfield in a desperate attempt to find out what is going on! You, the Protagonist, have finally found your friend Billy!! But did You want to? I mean, how are you supposed to sneak around with him wearing those loud-ass board shorts? PLUS: we take time to get to know about the author AND the illustrator, and give some of our final thoughts! With guests Brian Bayer (No Dice, Ampersand Theater), Stacy Pawlowski (No Dice, Mad Science), and special guest Liv Shircel (Ex Machina, No Dice).

We return to Master of Kung Fu by Richard Brightfield! Your friend Billy is STILL missing!!! But what can You, the Protagonist do back in time or whatever? Don’t worry! You, the Protagonist may have just been dreaming!! Maybe if You, the protagonist, follow that mysterious camera thief you will get to the bottom of things! PLUS: Stacy is the MEANEST person we know!!! With guests Brian Bayer (No Dice, Ampersand Theater), Stacy Pawlowski (No Dice, Mad Science), and special guest Liv Shircel (Ex Machina, No Dice).

This week we become a Master of Kung Fu by Richard Brightfield! You, the Protagonist, are on your way to a Kung Fu tour to China with your best friend Billy. But when Billy disappears it’s up to You the Protagonist, to find him...or not! You, the Protagonist, are sure he will be fine! Go on the tour without him, what could possibly go wrong? With guests Brian Bayer (No Dice, Ampersand Theater), Stacy Pawlowski (No Dice, Mad Science), and special guest Liv Shircel (Ex Machina, No Dice).

Our Journey Under the Sea, by M.A. Montgomery takes an unexpected turn as, You, the protagonist, meet some real life aliens, of course! Also, we all give our final thoughts on the book and Jessie gets VERY existential. BONUS we play the Fake Review Quote game and yell at our virtual assistant! It's a lot of (thoughtful) fun. With guests Brian Beyer (No Dice, Ampersand Theater) Stacy Pawlowski (Mad Science, Dinner Detective) and Special Guest Jessie "Frankie" Mahne Kanter (Traunic Barbershop).

This week our Journey Under the Sea by M.A. Montgomery brings you, the protagonist, even deeper into the political machinations of the People Under the Sea, as You, the protagonist, reject the overtures of an evil king who might just be sea Hitler! Plus, we talk about dreams and even what dreams may come, and find out that Nick needs a new headshot, Jessie HATES Charlie Bucket, and we even get to know a little about the Author. With guests Brian Beyer (No Dice, Ampersand Theater) Stacy Pawlowski (Mad Science, Dinner Detective) and Special Guest Jessie "Frankie" Mahne Kanter (Traunic Barbershop).

After a run in with some Sea Hippies, we return to our Journey Under the Sea by M.A. Montgomery! This time you, the protagonist, are brought into an undersea grotto. You meet the Atlanteans, but are they good, or are they evil? There's only one way to find out With guests Brian Beyer (No Dice, Ampersand Theater) Stacy Pawlowski (Mad Science, Dinner Detective) and Special Guest Jessie "Frankie" Mahne Kanter (Traunic Barbershop)

We dive deep into Journey Under the Sea by M.A. Montgomery! You, the protagonist, are an undersea explorer searching for the lost city of Atlantis. Do you take your submersible deep into the underwater canyon? Or do you stay on the ledge looking for some sage undersea wise-man to aid you on your Journey? Whatever you choose, you can bet there is going to be a Giant Squid! With guests Brian Beyer (No Dice, Ampersand Theater) Stacy Pawlowski (Mad Science, Dinner Detective) and Special Guest Jessie "Frankie" Mahne Kanter (Traunic Barbershop)

Host Nick Firer takes you back one last time to find the real Terror in Australia by Shannon Gilligan! After helping You, the protagonist, survive the dumbest most convoluted and overly complicated plan any terrorist has ever come up with, Nick and his friends take you on a little rabbit hunt to find out what the deal was with the mysterious Nazi You, the protagonist, met earlier on the train. It’s a whole lot of fun as they try to find out the answers to so many questions, almost too many questions, and Your story goes neatly off the rails!! With musician Brian Beyer (No Dice), comedian and producer Laura Holterman (Variety Hour Happy Hour), and special guest comedian and novelist Jacob Woelful (Schmitz and Giggles).

Host Nick Firer brings you back to Terror in Australia by Shannon Gilligan! After the disastrous results of making the safest choices you can, You the protagonist, decide to take some risks and find yourself in the middle of some international intrigue, involving a lost civilization, a uranium mine, and *GASP* some Muslim terrorists! Fortunately the Australian Intelligence Agency has sent their best agent, Major Winks, who is most definitely a cat wearing epaulets and a beret, to help you out! With musician Brian Beyer (No Dice), comedian and producer Laura Holterman (Variety Hour Happy Hour), and special guest comedian and novelist Jacob Woelful (Schmitz and Giggles).

Host Nick Firer goes deep down under and digs up some Terror in Australia written by Shannon Gilligan! It’s 1988 and You, the protagonist, are Australian! Not only are you Australian, but your parents are on vacation for three weeks!! What’s a young ausie to do? Why take the train to visit your celebrity archaeologist uncle of course! The adventure is just beginning, but You, the protagonist, quickly learn the safest choice is NEVER the best! With musician Brian Beyer (No Dice), comedian and producer Laura Holterman (Variety Hour Happy Hour), and special guest comedian and novelist Jacob Woelful (Schmitz and Giggles).

Host Nick Firer dives deeper into Supercomputer than You, the protagonist, have ever gone before, and boy do the accents keep coming! You, the protagonist, rewind and decide to use the Supercomputer, the height of 1984 sci-fi technology, to solve world peace!!! Buckle up, buckaroo, because the Gipper’s got other plans: Space! Of course!! PLUS we get to know a little about author Edward Packard and play the Review Game! With friends: musician Brian Bayer (No Dice), comedian and producer Laura Holterman (Variety Hour Happy Hour), and comedian Stacy Pawlowski (Shakespeare Raw, Dinner Detective)

Host Nick Firer returns to Supercomputer to see what happens when you give over the power of the supercomputer to a, decidedly sexy, Italian Scientist, with which you, the protagonist and obviously a child, have a clearly inappropriate relationship! With friends: musician Brian Bayer (No Dice), comedian and producer Laura Holterman (Variety Hour Happy Hour), and comedian Stacy Pawlowski (Shakespeare Raw, Dinner Detective).

Host Nick Firer tackles Supercomputer by Edward Packard. You, the protagonist are awarded a state-of-the-art (for 1984) supercomputer for winning a science fair, because that’s a thing that happens!!! What will You, the protagonist, do with this supercomputer? The only limit is your imagination...and 1984 sci-fi technology...and the words on the page. Be sure to read the instructions! We find out what’s in store for You, the protagonist, with help from friends: musician Brian Bayer (No Dice), comedian and producer Laura Holterman (Variety Hour Happy Hour), and comedian Stacy Pawlowski (Shakespeare Raw, Dinner Detective).