Podcasts about nope

NOPE!!!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Today Pastor Johnny will teach that following Jesus is not easy. In fact, Jesus even said that following Him meant people would hate you. It meant that hardships would come. It meant that you would have to leave behind your old way of life. All these things would be enough for anyone to say, “Nope, that life is not for me.” But Jesus didn't stop there. He also promised a life of light, love, and purpose. Think about it, you don't get to see the view on top of the mountain without climbing the mountain first.

Another day, another Dunk. The fellas try to figure out how real the Celtics are, why Tatum ain't getting MVP love, and look at the rest of MVP race (we also talk WAYYY too much Schroder). Then they turn to "Karl Anthony Towns or Gobert" debate, and how the Wolves recent surge changes our perception of KAT.Then "Dope or Nope": higher seeds tanking, the Jazz as a contender, Bron stat chasing in a broken season, Nurkic tossing a fan's phone. Another fun episode, tune in!

Our Patreon:  https://www.patreon.com/19Nocturne?fan_landing=true What do you do when you walk into your living room and find a demon?  And he claims his name is Bob? "What kind of a place is it? Why it's an apartment hallway, can't you tell?" Cast List Sherry - Angela Kirby Bob Johnson - Gene Thorkildsen Bob Johnston - Henry Mark Carmelita - Kristina Yuen Goat - himself Music by Kevin MacLeod (Incompetech.com) and Zlata Dzardanova Editing and Sound:   Julie Hoverson Cover Design:  Brett Coulstock ************************************************ THE WRONG BOB   Cast: Olivia Bob Johnson, neatnik unlucky accountant Bob Johnston, womanizing creep Sherry Miller, nice girl, also an accountant Carmelita, fortuneteller / sorceress OLIVIA           Did you have any trouble finding it?  What do you mean, what kind of a place is it?  Why, it's an apartment house hallway, can't you tell?  MUSIC            SCHMALTZY, INDETERMINATE TIME PERIOD FADES INTO SHERRY           [Whistling, continues until noted] SOUND            RATTLE OF KEYS, KEY INTO LOCK, KEY TURNS SOUND            DOOR OPENS.  A COUPLE FOOTSTEPS. RATTLE OF PAPER GROCERY BAG. SHERRY           [Whistle ends, grunt of effort] SOUND            DOOR SHUTS, LOCK CLICKS.  FOOTSTEPS TURN-- BOB              [Deep, scary demon voice]  SHERRY! SHERRY           [Screams!] SOUND            PAPER GROCERY BAG FALLS TO FLOOR.  SOMETHING GLASS SMASHES BOB              [Deep, scary demon voice, but worried tone] Shh!  [then, commanding] BE QUIET! SHERRY           [Muffles herself, still squeaking, dissolves into sobs] BOB              [Worried tone] It's not what you think. SHERRY           I-- What? BOB              It's not what you think. SHERRY           I walk in to find a demon on my couch, and it's not what I think?  BOB              I'm not a demon.  I ...think. SHERRY           [starting to get feisty]  Well, the red skin, wings, and-- and hooves!  [gasp, then upset]  My hardwood!  [angry] Huh!  Sure woulda fooled me! BOB              It's me.  Bob. SHERRY           [puzzled] Bob... who?  A demon named Bob? BOB              No.  Bob Johnson?  Next desk over? SHERRY           Anal Bob?  I mean..... um.... BOB              [sighs heavily]  Yes.  Bob Johnson. SHERRY           How can I be sure?  You don't look anything like-- BOB              I cleaned your kitchen while I was waiting for you to get home. SHERRY           Okay.  You're Bob.  How did you get in here? BOB              [abashed] Your landlord was... surprisingly cooperative. SHERRY           [working herself up] Now, two questions before I have to start screaming again-- BOB              Oh, please don't--! SHERRY           How did this happen? BOB              I don't know. SHERRY           [Screaming] And why are you in my living room? BOB              [cowed]  I-- I-- I thought you might be able to help.  You're the only person I know who, seems to know about witchcraft and things. SHERRY           Witchcraft?  Me? BOB              Well, you have a tarot card calendar at your desk. SHERRY           [sigh]  MUSIC SOUND            RATTLE OF TEACUPS  SHERRY           So you just woke up this way? BOB              [really down]  Yes. SHERRY           And you haven't done anything truly terrible, like murder or blasphemy or anything? BOB              I...wouldn't...know?  I'm not even Catholic! SHERRY           But you'd remember if you murdered anyone? BOB              [duh] Well, yes.  It would probably be in my day planner. SHERRY           I really hope you're kidding. SOUND            TEA CUP SHATTERS BOB              Darn!  Stupid claws. SHERRY           Don't worry about it.  Look, Bob, this is serious.  You have to think! BOB              I'm baffled.  You know me.  I don't do -- anything.  I read trade journals for accounting, and watch movies about private eyes.  SHERRY           You use the word "baffled" in conversation. BOB              I clean my house.  I sometimes build models out of matchsticks.  Once - once! - I got drunk and sang Louie, Louie at karaoke.  That's-- that's about it.  SHERRY           Ok, we've got to do something.  I'll go to your house-- BOB              345 Canterbury Drive-- SHERRY           --and look around, see if there's a gateway to the underworld, or some kind of evil fetish doll or something.  Give me your keys. BOB              [apologetic] I-- don't have pockets. SHERRY           [sigh] BOB              But I do have a key hidden in a crack under the windowsill of the third window on the left hand side of the--[fades out] MUSIC SOUND            DOOR OPENS, STEPS SHERRY           Bob? BOB              [muffled] Over here. SHERRY           Oh.  Why are you trying to hide? BOB              In case anyone came in. SHERRY           I'm the only one with a key. BOB              I didn't know if you might have a ... guy ... or something.  [quickly] Or a girl.  [shrug] You know.  I don't - just don't know.  Sorry SHERRY           Bob.  I'm not a lesbian, no matter what Fritz in acquisitions says - I just didn't want to go out with him.  Way too full of himself.  And I don't have a boyfriend.  BOB              Oh.  Sorry. SHERRY           Stop apologizing!  BOB              Did you find anything that might--? SHERRY           Nope.  But I did pick up your mail.  SOUND            SLAPS MAIL ON TABLE BOB              Um...  Could you open it for me? SHERRY           What?  BOB              I can't just leave it sitting there. SHERRY           Do what you gotta do.  [moving off] I need to eat something, anyway. BOB              I took all the expired food out of your fridge and threw it away. SHERRY           [from off] [sigh] Thanks. BOB              [calling] But I can't open my mail. SHERRY           [calling] What? BOB              [calling] The claws.  That's why I gave up on washing your dishes. SHERRY           [off] Aw, jeez.  [sigh]  Okay, give me time for a sandwich. MUSIC SOUND            TEARING SOUND SHERRY           [shocked] Bob! BOB              MM?  What?  [gasping, turning redder] Oh, goodness-- that's not mine! SHERRY           [half teasing] Like hell it isn't, you perv. BOB              It's not - look at the address.  [begging] Seriously.  SHERRY           Bob Johnston, 345 Canterbury Court.  Sounds right, though they misspelled-- BOB              I'm at Canterbury drive.  Not court.  And I don't have a T in my name.  [agonized] I get this guy's mail all the time.  [pause]  I should have checked before asking you to open stuff.  Sorry. SOUND            PAGES TURNING SHERRY           Hmm.  Always wondered what that was for--  [snapped back to conversation] What was that?  BOB              This guy.  He gets my mail, I get his.  I started having anything identity theft-ish sent to a p.o. box, just so it couldn't end up in this joker's hands. SHERRY           Does he get a lot of these catalogs? BOB              That one's pretty tame.  They were amusing at first, but now it's like - it's like I have no spam filter.  [breaks down in tears] SHERRY           Hey, Bob.  C'mon, it isn't that bad.  BOB              Yes it is. SHERRY           That you get the occasional catalog from a sex shop? BOB              And packages.  There's a whole stack of them in the front hall closet that he hasn't come and picked up yet this month. SHERRY           Is that what those were?  Packages...  Are you sure they're all ... naughty stuff? BOB              No, I guess not, but what else would they be?  Encyclopedias?  I just see his name and toss them into the closet - plus I don't ever order anything.  SHERRY           Hmm.  [musing]  Maybe I'll return them to him.  A chance to see this creep. BOB              [down] Yeah. SHERRY           What? BOB              Apparently, despite his ... hobbies ... women seem to, well... like him.  You'll probably end up liking him too. SHERRY           I'm not that easy.  Just ask Fritz. MUSIC AMBIANCE         LIGHT MUSIC IN BACKGROUND SHERRY           [giggles, sounds slightly drunk] and then I fell off the stage! JOHNSTON         [soooo smooth]  Really?  I can't imagine you being so - uncoordinated.  You have such grace. SHERRY           Me?  Ohh! [oh, you!] JOHNSTON         I like grace - it's so rare.  And grace lasts.  Like personality.  SHERRY           [a little cautious]  Oh? JOHNSTON         I can't help it - I take the long view on things.  Think about what it might be like - you know - if we were still together years from now. SHERRY           And what do you see? JOHNSTON         Long walks on the beach.  Candlelit dinners.  Wow - I can - you know, you're just someone I can really talk to.  [rueful chuckle] Usually I don't admit how much I like simple things... SOUND            PHONE RINGS, KEEPS RINGING UNTIL PICKED UP SHERRY           Go ahead. JOHNSTON         It can go to voice. SHERRY           Nah.  I need a moment, anyway.  Down the hall? JOHNSTON         On the left. SOUND            HER FOOTSTEPS GO, THEN SLOW AND STOP SOUND            HE PICKS UP PHONE SHERRY           Hmm? [stopping to listen] JOHNSTON         [slightly off, bright] You got Bob!  [exasperated sigh, then angry]  Look, you--  [beat] No!  I don't care--  [beat] Call them.  See if I care! SOUND            SLAMS DOWN PHONE SHERRY           Hmm!  SOUND            SHE TIPTOES AWAY SHERRY           [going off] Four one hundred, five one hundred, six-- SOUND            [beat, then] FLUSH JOHNSTON         [muttered, like a curse]  Women. SOUND            SHERRIE'S FEET, COMING BACK ON SHERRY           Wow - I just realized the time! JOHNSTON         What, but-- SHERRY           Thank you so much for your ... hospitality. JOHNSTON         [cajoling] Come on, sweet thing - the night is young! SHERRY           But my mother isn't - and she expects me to bring her her medicine.  Can't disappoint mom. JOHNSTON         No.  Of course.  Can I - see you again? SHERRY           Hmm.  I think that can be arranged.  SOUND            QUICK MWA GOODNIGHT KISS, THEN DOOR OPENS MUSIC SOUND            PHONE RINGS BOB              Oh, crap. SOUND            PHONE RINGS SEVERAL MORE TIMES BOB              [undecided]  Uhh...  Stop!  Go away!  She's not home! SOUND            PHONE STOPS, CLICK BOB              [sigh of relief] SOUND            MESSAGE COMES ON BOB              [gasp of surprise] SHERRY           Hi!  This is Sherry.  Leave a message. BOB              [sigh of relief] SOUND            BEEP SHERRY           [on the phone] Bob!  Don't break my phone, just listen. BOB              Ok. SHERRY           [on the phone] Jeez, I hope you're there.  [chuckle] Where else would he be?  Right.  I'm going to consult an expert.  I'm just leaving Bob's place - the other Bob's place - and there's this fortuneteller shop.  It's probably all a crock, but it's a place to start.  So don't be surprised if I'm not home any time soon.  [beat]  Oh, and you're gonna owe me whatever I have to pay this fortuneteller chick. BOB              I don't have any pockets. SHERRY           [on the phone] When you're back.  Normal, I mean.  Bye! SOUND            PHONE HANGS UP, DIAL TONE, THEN OUT BOB              [musing] I guess in the long run, any cost benefit analysis would lean in favor of paying whatever it costs to return to normal, since I couldn't really function in my job as I am now...  Oh no!  Work! SOUND            FUMBLES WITH PHONE SOUND            BREAKING NOISE BOB              Oh-- drat! MUSIC AMB              MID-EASTERN MUSIC SOUND            DOOR OPENS, JINGLE OF BELL SHERRY           Hello? SOUND            DOOR SWINGS SHUT HARD, NO BELL CARMELITA        One minute.  Remain where you are.  I must finish my communion with the spirits. SHERRY           [muttered] I'll wait for the flush.  SOUND            SLOW PACING SHERRY           [listing things] Palmistry.  Hmm.  [puzzled] I don't even have that line.  Ah well.  Maybe-- SOUND            A COUPLE MORE STEPS SHERRY           Tarot cards.  [sigh, muttered] Jeez, Bob.  You're such a dork.  [quoting jokingly] "The lovers- you will soon fall madly in love" SOUND            BEADED CURTAIN SWEPT ASIDE CARMELITA        [angry]  Nonsense!  The lovers is a card of choice!  You want love, look to cups! SHERRY           [very nervous and startled] I-I was just quoting....  An old commercial.  Look, I don't mean to be... snippy or anything, I'm just...  I've never done this before. CARMELITA        I accept your apology.  [slight warning breath, then satisfied sigh]  The spirits accept as well. SHERRY           [skeptical] Right.  CARMELITA        Come.  Sit.  Are you looking for your future or your past? SOUND            FEET MOVE TO TABLE SHERRY           I'm actually here for a friend... CARMELITA        Ah, yes.  "Your friend" - is she in some kind of trouble? SHERRY           No, no, it's a he-- CARMELITA        A lover? SHERRY           Oh god no! CARMELITA        Hmm.  Hold on.  Give me your hand. SHERRY           Look, why don't I just tell you what's going on--? CARMELITA        Shh! SHERRY           Fine.  Here. CARMELITA        Hmm.  I see.  Hmm.  Who does your nails?  These are very nice. SHERRY           Why are you looking at my manicure rather than my palm? CARMELITA        [shrug]  It is one way to tell how much help you can afford.  See?  I am being blunt for you, since you are a non-nonsense woman, I can see that. SHERRY           Look, this is silly.  I-I'm gonna leave.  How much do I owe you? CARMELITA        Stop!  One card.  I will show you one card, and if it does not resonate for you, then you may leave and owe me nothing.  SHERRY           Fine.  Go ahead. CARMELITA        Cut the deck. SOUND            LARGE CARD DECK, CUT SHERRY           There. CARMELITA        Again. SOUND            LARGE CARD DECK, CUT SHERRY           [sigh] Good enough? CARMELITA        I have not touched the cards, you see?  Turn over that top card.  The auger there will stun you. SOUND            [beat, then] CARD QUICKLY FLIPPED OVER SHERRY           [gasp!] MUSIC SOUND            DOOR OPENS SHERRY           What the hell? BOB              Sorry. SHERRY           You trashed my living room! BOB              [apologetic] Apparently demons have anger management issues.  I'll pay you back!  An Ikea gift card should cover most of it-- SHERRY           What the hell got into you? BOB              [more and more miserable] I tried to call in sick, and ...broke the phone.  That was sort of the last straw. SHERRY           [exasperated sigh, then cold] Did you at least get my message? BOB              [subdued] Yes. SHERRY           [beat]  Aren't you curious? BOB              I'm... waiting for you to yell at me. SHERRY           I'm... I'm done. BOB              [worried] Are you sure? SHERRY           Let me guess - your mom was pretty - um - rowdy when you screwed up. BOB              Um...yes. SHERRY           That explains a lot.  Look, I went to the fortuneteller-- BOB              Can you-- I'm sorry, but, um - can you check in with the office first?  [really anxious] Please?  I haven't missed a day of work in six and a half years - not since I got bronchial pneumonia that one winter. SHERRY           Fine.  SOUND            CELLPHONE FLIPS OPEN MUSIC AMB              MID-EASTERN MUSIC CARMELITA        Come to me!  Come to me!  I need the power!  [moans and noises, but no words]  I feel it!  Yes! SOUND            MICROWAVE BEEPS CARMELITA        Aha! MUSIC SHERRY           Done. BOB              Did they say anything? SHERRY           Not really.  You got plenty of time banked.  I told them you were delirious today and that's why you didn't call in. BOB              Oh, that's a good one. SHERRY           Sit, will you? SOUND            HEAVY BODY SITS, FURNITURE CREAKS SHERRY           [sigh]  This chick, Carmelita - well, I didn't tell her everything.  I didn't tell her much, at all, I just couldn't see how!  It was ... well-- BOB              Too weird? SHERRY           Kinda.  The weirdest part was she had me pick a card, and it was-- BOB              The Devil? SHERRY           I thought you didn't know about any of this stuff. BOB              It's ... October on your calander. SHERRY           [sigh, then matter of fact] Anyway, I said I had a friend who was cursed, and asked about how to break curses.  She said I needed to bring her something that belongs to the friend, and she could sort of diagnose the problem.  Do you have anything that doesn't look all ... um... demony? BOB              Uh...  what sort of things? SHERRY           Something from your body - hair, something. BOB              [worried] You want to pull some hair?  SHERRY           She said it had to come straight from the source and be fresh. BOB              All right.  I'll turn my back and you pull.  Make it quick. SHERRY           Are you really such a total wuss? BOB              Well - um - uh - [small] I have a very low pain threshold. SHERRY           [sigh] All right.  Bend down. SOUND            HEAVY NOISES AS HE MOVES BOB              OK, go. SHERRY           [exasperated sigh]  All right.  Brace yourself. BOB              Wait! SHERRY           No - just "man up", Bob. BOB              Wait!  Something's happening! SHERRY           I haven't even started yet! BOB              [scream, which turns odd] Ahh! SOUND            SCUFFLE, BODY FLUNG, DROP, CREAKY NOISES, SCUTTLE OF HOOVES SHERRY           Oh crap. SOUND            GOAT "MAAAAA" MUSIC AMB              mid-eastern MUSIC SOUND            DOOR FLUNG OPEN, BELL PINGS SOUND            FEET STORM IN SHERRY           [agitated, quick] Hello?  Hello?  Damn it, get out here! SOUND            BEAD CURTAIN MOVES SLOWLY ASIDE CARMELITA        [tired or hung over]  Shush.  I am not open for business. SHERRY           Your door was unlocked. CARMELITA        A mistake.  Go away. SHERRY           No!  Help me and I'll leave.  I don't know another damn fortuneteller  or witch or anything in the entire city.  I have a goddam goat in my bathroom, and I need help. CARMELITA        A... goat? SHERRY           Yes.  [deep breath, trying to calm down, talks quieter]  Look, can we please talk?  CARMELITA        [long beat, then a sigh] Sit.  I will make tea. MUSIC SOUND            SIPPING TEA SHERRY           Is your head any better? CARMELITA        A bit.  As long as you talk quietly, it will not explode.  I had a bit of a long night. SHERRY           Problems? CARMELITA        Oh, don't even get me started. SHERRY           Hey, I can listen, if it'll help at all.  I'm not in such a rush. CARMELITA        Really? SHERRY           Sure.  [coaxing]  Come on.  CARMELITA        It's a man. SHERRY           [sympathetic] Isn't it always? CARMELITA        He's a bastard.  An evil bastard. SHERRY           There's plenty of 'em out there. CARMELITA        [breaking] I loved him. SHERRY           Tell me about it. CARMELITA        [teary] He is so charming.  Good teeth.  Good hair.  Good job.  [sips, then] Good catch. SHERRY           And I'll bet he knows it, too. CARMELITA        Of course.  But he comes in here, saying he has a dream he wants interpreted.  Says he has dreamed of me - that I, Carmelita, have haunted his dreams.  SHERRY           Smooth bastard. CARMELITA        So smooth you could buff him and see your face in him. SHERRY           [a bit puzzled]  Right.  Smooth like glass. CARMELITA        Just like glass. SHERRY           Shiny and flat and totally transparent once you look at them the right way. CARMELITA        [laughing a bit] Yes!  Just like that! SHERRY           I know just the type.  So he-- CARMELITA        He took advantage of my girlish heart.  SHERRY           Full advantage? CARMELITA        Yes.  SHERRY           [tsks]  CARMELITA        And then, once he had his wicked way - as the old movies say - poof!  He was gone. SHERRY           Screening his calls? CARMELITA        Worse.  He changed his number. SHERRY           [ouch noise] ooh! CARMELITA        So I got his new address.  [shrug]  Spirits are good for many things. SHERRY           Yeah, but can they find you a good man? CARMELITA        [disgusted noise]  They can find me a unicorn first.  Good men are more scarce. SHERRY           Amen to that. CARMELITA        The charming ones are all scum. [spits] SHERRY           And the boring ones-- CARMELITA        Oh, I would take boring in a heartbeat, if I could only trust him. SHERRY           Yeah, that's the trick. CARMELITA        Well.  I feel a little better now.  Tell me about your goat. MUSIC SOUND            APARTMENT DOOR OPENS SHERRY           Hello? BOB              [off, muffled] Maaa! SOUND            SHE WALKS DOWN THE HALL SHERRY           We might have the answer, Bob.  SOUND            BATHROOM DOOR OPENS BOB              [sad] Maa. SHERRY           Oh, goodness, Bob.  That's what the paper was for.  [sigh]  Come on. SOUND            HOOVES MUSIC AMB              MUSIC SOUND            DOOR OPENS, BELL SOUND            HOOVES ENTER CARMELITA        This is the goat? SHERRY           Ya think? CARMELITA        Of course.  Be quiet while I channel the spirits.  [hums, changing keys]  BOB              Maa? SHERRY           Shh! CARMELITA        [humming ends]  You're right - it is your goat.  The agreement stands, then.  Take this. SHERRY           OK.  Now, Bob.  You be a good goat and stay with Carmelita here.  I have an errand to run. BOB              [a bit panicky] Maa? CARMELITA        Don't worry, bubula, I'm rather fond of goats. MUSIC SOUND            DOORBELL JOHNSTON         Just a minute! SHERRY           [through the door] Bob?  I hope this isn't a bad time? SOUND            DOOR OPENS JOHNSTON         Oh, no!  I was - this is just crazy, but I was just thinking of you!  Cosmic, isn't it? SHERRY           Wow! JOHNSTON         What's all that? SHERRY           Turns out there were some packages for you along with the mail today.  Figured I'd ...um... [coquettish]... have another excuse to drop in. JOHNSTON         Mmm! SHERRY           There's a few more, but I figure that'll keep. JOHNSTON         Here, let me get those. SOUND            WALKS, PICKS UP BOXES JOHNSTON         [grunt]  Wow!  How'd you get this all up here? SHERRY           I guess my mind was ....on other things. JOHNSTON         [interested, sexy] Oh? SOUND            HE GETS THE BOXES IN, THEY COLLAPSE ALL OVER THE FLOOR SOUND            SOMETHING GETS LOOSE AND ROLLS ACROSS THE FLOOR, BUZZING SHERRY           [embarrassed laugh]  Oh-ho! JOHNSTON         Oh.  That.  That's, um, for a friend. SHERRY           I'll bet.  [really laughing now]  Look out!  It's making a run for it! JOHNSTON         Here. SOUND            SCOOPS UP THE TOY, TURNS IT OFF, DROPS IT INTO BOX SHERRY           You're a man of ...interesting... tastes. JOHNSTON         I won't apologize.  I like to make my woman feel ...very ...good. SHERRY           A guy like you must already have a woman.  Or a bunch of them. JOHNSTON         [sigh, rueful]  I've been looking for so long for the right woman.  The woman who can make me really want to settle down.  You know?  A woman who makes me want to stay home and eat the same thing every night? SHERRY           But in the meantime--? JOHNSTON         Well, nothing wrong with exercising my god-given talents.  Just means that once I find this ...special... woman, I'll be an expert.  Able to fulfill her every need. SHERRY           [chuckle, then quiet] Paint my house. JOHNSTON         What? SHERRY           Sorry.  Quoting.  I don't suppose you have something to ...drink ... around here? JOHNSTON         Of course.  SOUND            TAKES A COUPLE OF STEPS JOHNSTON         Your mother? SHERRY           Huh? JOHNSTON         Are you going to have to run off again? SHERRY           [muttered] You're good. [up] Bingo night. JOHNSTON         Ahhhh. MUSIC AMB              MUSIC SOUND            CARDS BEING TURNED OVER CARMELITA        The Lovers.  [chuckles]  Strange card for a goat.  What sort of choice have you made recently, do you think?  SOUND            TURNS ANOTHER CARD BOB              [worried] Maa! CARMELITA        No, no, darling.  [mwa!]  Death is not so bad as you think.  It means change - for you this is a good card in your near future.  I think your friend is actually going to pull this off! BOB              [like a sigh] Maa. CARMELITA        keep your chin up.  You can always stay here and be [cutesy] my little goat. MUSIC AMB              LOW SEXY MUSIC PLAYS SOUND            DRINKS POUR SENSUOUSLY SHERRY           [sigh] JOHNSTON         Hmm? SHERRY           Just thinking back on the silly coincidence that got me here. JOHNSTON         Pure karma, baby. SHERRY           Could I have a bit of ice? JOHNSTON         [chuckle] You don't ice this stuff, babe.  It's the heat that makes it go down so nicely. SHERRY           [suggestive]  It's not for the drink. JOHNSTON         Oh-ho! SOUND            HE GETS UP, WALKS OFF SOUND            UP CLOSE, SHE OPENS A TINY LITTLE BOTTLE, POURS SOMETHING INTO THE DRINK SHERRY           [calling, over the sounds] You might bring a whole bowl of them! SOUND            [OFF] HE OPENS THE FRIDGE, POPS OUT SOME ICE FROM A TRAY JOHNSTON         [off] You got it! SHERRY           [sigh of relief] SOUND            HE COMES BACK JOHNSTON         What happened? SHERRY           Happened? JOHNSTON         Did you put something in my drink? SHERRY           [trying to play it cutesy]  Just a widdle wuv potion. JOHNSTON         [angry, totally breaking the mood] A what?  What is it with you spooky chicks? SHERRY           Huh? JOHNSTON         Damn love potions and crap, seriously, what the hell is it? SHERRY           Jeez, Bob.  I was joking.  What crawled up your ass? JOHNSTON         Then, what?  Huh?  What did you put in there? SHERRY           It was just a little bubbly stuff.  Here, I'll drink it.  [exasperated sigh] It's just a game. JOHNSTON         You ruined perfectly good-- SHERRY           It's just - I've always-- [tsk, breaks off] JOHNSTON         What? SHERRY           I've always had this fantasy of being a femme fatale.  A bond girl.  Something really naughty. JOHNSTON         [getting into it - a little] Really? SHERRY           Yeah.  I was just playing. JOHNSTON         Hmm.  SHERRY           I didn't think you would freak. JOHNSTON         Let's just put it down to bad experiences, 'kay?  Everyone's had 'em. SHERRY           [still miffed] Right. JOHNSTON         Oh, come on - we can still share the other glass.  I'll sip-- [sips] Now you. SHERRY           [giving in]  All right. JOHNSTON         There. SOUND            A BIT OF MASHING, MUSIC UP MUSIC BOB              Maa? CARMELITA        She has been gone a long time.  I hope it all is all right-- oh! SOUND            WEIRD STRETCHY NOISES BOB              [moaning in agony, etc. kinda goofy] CARMELITA        Now that is fascinating.  I've never actually had a chance to watch this end of a curse. BOB              [still gasping and ouchy] Oh!  Goodness...  Um, [gasps in shock] Don't just stare at me! CARMELITA        Why not?  You're human again. SOUND            PULLING THE TABLECLOTH, DISHES RATTLE CARMELITA        Stop that! BOB              [panicking] But I'm.... nude. CARMELITA        As if I have never seen a nude man before. BOB              Um.... I've never... BEEN nude before. CARMELITA        [with interest, teasing] Oh? BOB              You wouldn't have some pants somewhere? CARMELITA        I'll go and check.  You might want to close the curtains, beefcakes. BOB              [panic] Ahh! SOUND            MORE RATTLE OF DISHES CARMELITA        [calling back as she leaves the room] Kidding! SOUND            BEAD CURTAIN PARTS SOUND            FRONT DOOR OPENS, BELL RINGS CARMELITA        A-ha! SOUND            FEET ENTER SHERRY           Mission accomplished.  More or less.  [grunts with effort] SOUND            CREAK OF ROPE JOHNSTON         Maaa! SHERRY           Don't you even try that again! SOUND            HOOVES PULLED INTO ROOM CARMELITA        How did you do it?  He's one tricky bastard. SHERRY           Oh, I have a few tricks of my own-- SOUND            BEAD CURTAIN MOVES A LITTLE BOB              Sherry?  I'm... um... [unsure] okay now. SHERRY           Yeah.  Good.  [snickers]  Nice loincloth. BOB              [blushing] It was all I could-- CARMELITA        Oh, no you didn't!  Not my mother's good apron!  [commanding]  You get right back in there, mister and I will find you something! BOB              Okay. Sorry! SOUND            BEAD CURTAIN SWINGS CARMELITA        Can you take my guest here through to the yard - that door, there? SHERRY           With pleasure.  [grunting] Come on! SOUND            CREAK OF ROPE JOHNSTON         Maa!!! MUSIC CARMELITA        So what did you do?  Put it in his drink? SHERRY           First, what's going to happen to him?  Jackass he may be, but I can't see leaving him a goat forever. CARMELITA        I'll give him a couple of weeks.  Then turn him back, let him try and explain what happened. SHERRY           I can just see the Judge Judy episode where he tries to sue your pants off. BOB              [muttered] Only if you have pants... CARMELITA        She would laugh him out of court.  "But really, this bitch turned me into a goat for two weeks..."  SHERRY           She'd say "turned you?  [slowing losing it to laughter as she goes along] The defense has a laundry list of witnesses ready to swear you already were a goat..." CARMELITA        [laughing almost hysterically] BOB              What about me? SHERRY           [calming down]  Honestly, Bob.  I think you'll be fine.  BOB              But ...work? SHERRY           Didn't even miss you.  [backpedaling] I mean  -- everyone feels you're about due for a mental health day.  Or five. CARMELITA        But I still don't see how you managed it? SHERRY           Simple.  You told me all about his moves.  His technique. BOB              I know.  Do guys really DO all that?  Just to get-- CARMELITA        Shh.  We'll talk later, darling.  [with feeling] Later. BOB              Ulp! SHERRY           [chuckling a bit]  So it was easy.  Once I put the fizzy stuff in his drink, he got all huffy and wouldn't drink it, even though I offered to take it myself. BOB              I wouldn't either. [shuts himself up suddenly] CARMELITA        And so? SHERRY           You said he was big nibbler.  I put the real potion all over my neck and shoulders.  Didn't take long before - poof! BOB              I know you've done me a huge favor here, Sherry, and I owe you plenty, but could you do one last teensy thing? SHERRY           [sigh] What's that? BOB              Pants?  SHERRY           Pants? BOB              Bring me some?  This blanket won't get me home - at least not without being arrested. SHERRY           [sigh] Pants it is.  CARMELITA        Not too quickly. BOB              [panicky] Huh? CARMELITA        There's something very... attractive about a man who already knows [intense] not to cross a witch. BOB              [gulp] CARMELITA        And you're awfully cute.  At least without the hooves. BOB              Um, thanks?  [up] Sherry? SOUND            DOOR SHUTS, BELL DINGS JOHNSTON         [almost a laugh] maa-aa-aa-aa! CLOSER      

Alternate Current Radio Presents: BOILER ROOM - Learn to protect yourself from predatory MediaIn the second part of this March 24th, 2022 Boiler Room, Mark Anderson gives an update on the political prisoner, PF Lazor, while the group looks at the deeper systemic issues that demonstrate how far the current United States governmental style is from the original founding concept of a Republic by, of and for the citizens. Violent Cartel wars with each-other and the Mexican military on the Texas border, sure, did it get as much press as violence in the Ukrainian border... Nope!Featuring: Hesher, Spore, Mark Anderson, Ruckus, Infidel Pharaoh & MindSpaceArtMusic: Walk-On Army & Permanent Wavehttps://alternatecurrentradio.com

Alternate Current Radio Presents: BOILER ROOM - Learn to protect yourself from predatory MediaIn the first part of this March 24th, 2022 episode of Boiler Room listeners will find Hesher opening the show with a requiem to the Republic as we find ourselves on the brink of "this and that" form of systemic meltdowns. Then the gang looks at some of President's recent comments with regards to food shortages, cyber attacks and of course sickness and death to see how that's all going and ponder where it leads. In the second part of this Boiler Room, Mark Anderson gives an update on the political prisoner, PF Lazor, while the group looks at the deeper systemic issues that demonstrate how far the current United States governmental style is from the original founding concept of a Republic by, of and for the citizens. Violent Cartel wars with each-other and the Mexican military on the Texas border, sure, did it get as much press as violence in the Ukrainian border... Nope!Featuring: Hesher, Spore, Mark Anderson, Ruckus, Infidel Pharaoh, Oddman Out & MindSpaceArtMusic: Walk-On Army & Permanent Wavehttps://alternatecurrentradio.com

When you say "yes" to something, you're saying "no" to something else. This understanding has really allowed me to embrace turning down more things. Sometimes, distractions are disguised as opportunities. Learning how to filter what's important and what's not based on your current priorities will serve you well. Connect with Chris: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chrisbello_  Complete Life Tracker (FREE): https://chrisbello.com/free  Get help buying/selling real estate in the US: https://calendly.com/chrisbellorealestate/workwithchris

Is it mean to live with boundaries? Do they keep you walled off from other people? Nope! Our guest today Nedra Tawwab says, “Boundaries are expectations and needs that help you feel safe and comfortable in your relationships.” Sounds like they're pretty essential, huh? Nedra's a therapist who shares (with her 1.4 million Instagram followers @nedratawwab) how to clearly communicate your needs and expectations so you can create healthy, loving relationships. Today Nedra and Emily talk about ways to communicate your needs more clearly to your partner, how to raise kids with healthy boundaries, and how to honor yourself through it all.   (Need a boundaries refresher? Go back to Episode 49, aka “Calm Your Anxiety with Better Boundaries,” and take a listen!)   * * * Thank you to our episode sponsors!   BETTERHELP | Affordable, private online therapy — anytime, anywhere. Get 10% off your first month at betterhelp.com/simplified KIWICO | STEAM and science kits for kids! Get 30% off your first month, plus FREE shipping on any crate line with code SIMPLIFIED at kiwico.com   * * * GET NEW EPISODES EARLY + AD-FREE https://apple.co/3ICMUmk    * * * SHOW NOTES emilyley.com/podcast * * * PRE-ORDER EMILY'S KIDS BOOK! You're Always Enough: And More Than I Hoped For * * * SUBSCRIBE Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Stitcher | iHeartRadio | YouTube * * * LET'S BE FRIENDS! Simplified: Instagram | Facebook | Twitter | Pinterest Emily Ley: Instagram | Facebook

Bible Reading: James 3:2-10Jason opened the car door and settled into the front seat. "Hi, Mom. School was fun today--even science class," he said, fastening his seat belt. "What do you think is the most amazing muscle in your body?" "My heart," said Mom as they started home. Jason grinned. "Nope, guess again!""UhI give up. What is the most amazing muscle in my body?" "Your tongue," replied Jason. "That's what Mr. Hernandez thinks, anyway. For one thing, we don't even have to think about the tongue or tell it what to do. It just does it." "Like tasting?" asked Mom. "That seems to be one of your favorite activities." Jason laughed. "It is! I learned that the tongue has more than three thousand taste buds, and I think I should exercise mine on some cookies when we get home. But that's not all our tongues do. They help us move food around in our mouths, and they help us form the words we want to say when we talk." Mom nodded. "You're right. I'm not sure I ever thought about that before. And did you know the tongue is also the part of the body that we probably sin with the most?" "It is?" Jason looked surprised to hear that. "It's something like the steering wheel of this car," Mom told him. "I need to control this steering wheel to make the car go in the right direction. If I lose control, the car won't turn into the driveway like I want it to in just a minute. It could go off in any direction, and it would probably end up doing a lot of damage--like hitting a telephone pole." She turned into the driveway. "We need to control our tongues too. We can use them wisely to praise God and encourage others. But if we lose control, we may say unkind words in anger or gossip about others.""So, our tongues can be used for either good or bad," Jason mused."Right," said Mom. "But because we trust in Jesus, we can choose good every time! He gives us the power to control our tongues so we can use our words in ways that show others who He is." "Wow," said Jason. "That really is amazing!"-Jacqueline LeaycraftHow About You?How do you use your tongue? Do you use it to thank God for all He's done for you and to worship Him? Do you use it to encourage others with kind words? Or do you sometimes speak without thinking and say harmful, unkind things? Today's Bible reading points out that the tongue can do a great deal of damage. It's important to keep it under control. Trust Jesus to help you use this amazing muscle He's given you for good. Today's Key Verse:Set a guard, O Lord, over my mouth; keep watch over the door of my lips. (Psalm 141:3 (NKJV))Today's Key Thought:Control your tongue--with God's help

  Wake the Faith up Slayer… This is Garth Heckman with the David Alliance and you can reach me at TDAgiantslayer@gmail.com    Brought to you by wellbuiltbody.com Gym Apparel for men and women that rocks and shocks and ain't for everybody - but just might be for you. wellbuiltbody.com    www.protectorspeak.com  Law enforcement and military      Iran and the US is still seeking a deal for oil… Iran is upping its nuclear capabilities. War and now rumors of war with Russia and Poland and or germany. And if you haven't been paying attention Putin has been marching through Africa killing and taking control much through aligning with other dictators, Kings rulers etc… Inflation is sky high, The US is torn between Republican and Democrat, pro life and pro abortion, Pipeline vs. no pipeline, etc… not to mention There is talk of WWIII on the lips of many. There are rumors of other wars swirling. There is talk of a new COVID variant, fuel prices are soaring, supplies are dwindling – the negatives go on and on. But we, as Christians, need not fear. The One who knows the end from the beginning has made us a promise:   2 Timothy 1:7 For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.  Jimmy Evans writes… This is so comforting because we do not find the word “unless” in or following this great truth. That means that when the world is filled with uncertainty and fear, we have soundness of mind and no fear. That means that when troubles come that weaken the human spirit, we have power through the Holy Spirit. So what do we do during this time? Give more - Expect more - Trust more! Give more what? Money, time, give a stronger witness in sharing Christ.  Why? I want people to see Gods goodness, his protection and his redeeming power in the life of believers.  My wife and I had a conversation last week about tithing… and you know what it would be easy to not tithe in todays world… but we do. And this week it has been tight… but I walked into my office and someone had slid under the door an envelope with Cash stuffed in it, I had received another check for $300 and I got a check from my publisher for royalty on my books, then someone dropped of a gas card for $100 and another $125 came in - this all in 2 days…. and I want to brag to a world that is worried that God is my supplier, my redeemer - he snaps the jaw of the devourer and aligns rows and rows of good things for me to reap. Gain is my future as I continue to give to God in all areas of my life. Again, not so I get stuff back, NOPE the only motive I have is to make God look good in these times of panic, want and fear for the rest of the world. Remember what Hebrews 13 says Hebrews 13:5-6 Let your conduct be without covetousness; be content with such things as you have. For He Himself has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.” So we may boldly say: “The LORD is my helper; I will not fear. What can man do to me?”   Let your conduct be without covetousness… what is Paul saying? He is saying quit looking at what everyone else has and wether or not you have enough, or will have enough or how will things work out… Be content and rest in God… he got you bro!    The Lord is my helper GK God will run to you to supply your needs. LOL so we can run after things in a panic or we can just let God run to us to meet our needs. I hate running so I will let God run!    Look Scripture is crystal clear in times of trial: We don't panic, we don't worry, we don't doubt, we don't strive, we don't fear - we simply trust God and allow his faithfulness to meet our need and to show off his goodness in our life as a witness to the rest of the world!    Give more - Expect more - Trust more!

Nope … ich bin kein James Bond … besitze keine Wunderwaffen gegen den universalen Terrorismus. Ganz davon abgesehen: Wir wissen alle, dass der Bond nur im Film wirbelt. Und am Set wird jede Szene so lange durchgeackert, bis der Regisseur seinen Daumen in die Luft streckt und der Tross die nächste Einstellung probt. Und selbst […]

REDUX: Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) is one of the leading treatments for PTSD. Melissa Parks breaks down how this therapy can help you recover and why it is so highly effective. NEW: Alyssa also shares her personal journey with starting this type of treatment.   **Every donation to Patreon for the month of March will go to Doctors Without Borders to help support those injured in Ukraine. Alyssa will personally match your donation. See the podcast Patreon and learn more about Doctors Without Borders below!** Patreon Learn more about Doctors Without Borders   Check out the Light After Trauma website for transcripts, other episodes, Alyssa's guest appearances, and more at: www.lightaftertrauma.com Want to get more great content and interact with the show? Check us out on Instagram: @lightaftertrauma   Transcript Alyssa Scolari [00:23]: Hey everybody, what's up? Welcome back to another episode of the Light After Trauma Podcast. I'm your host, Alyssa Scolari, and I am recording this episode on a gorgeous Friday morning. I am in a good mood. But it has honestly been a rough week, or I should say like a rough couple of weeks. I don't know what is going on or what is in the air, but man, I just feel like things have been so hard. It's just, I think there's a lot going on between people trying to get back to living a semi-normal life or a new normal and everybody is having parties and hosting things. And it's really exciting, but as somebody who is like an introvert inside and somebody who has really spent a lot of time indoors over the last two years for the pandemic, it causes me kind of a lot of anxiety to suddenly go from not being invited anywhere to being invited to all of these places every single weekend. Alyssa Scolari [01:31]: And just things with my practice, like my private practice have been, I don't want to say difficult, but not the easiest or the happiest I should say. Not that I'm unhappy in my job, I love what I do, but there are times where this job is really hard and I have had to set a lot of firm boundaries the last couple of weeks. And setting boundaries is really, really hard for me, it's extremely triggering. Because when I set a boundary, I have this massive fear that something bad is going to happen. So, it's just been a week for me filled with a lot of anxiety, still recovering from surgery, still going to physical therapy. So, whatever, it's really neither here nor there. Alyssa Scolari [02:21]: All of that is to say that it's been difficult. I'm in a good mood today, the sun is shining, but the last few weeks have been a little bit rough for me. And with that being said, this week's episode is an episode that was recorded and that went live a year, a little more than a year ago, so early March of 2021. And I am replaying it today because it is very fitting and it's one of our most popular episodes. But it came out when the podcast was very, very new. So, for everybody who is new, this episode might be brand new for you. And even if it's not, it's something that's important to listen to even again and something that you may or may not want to consider. Alyssa Scolari [03:10]: And so, basically, what we're doing today is I am reposting the EMDR episode. So, EMDR is this specific type of trauma therapy that is used to treat both standard PTSD and complex PTSD, and it has a ton of research backing its effectiveness. And it really works on rewiring the brain. Because trauma is rooted in the brain, it sometimes makes talk therapy, which sometimes makes talk therapy not enough. Some people do great with talk therapy, and for some people, it truly isn't enough. I find that with some folks with complex PTSD, talk therapy is not always sufficient. It's definitely necessary, of course, but sometimes we need a little bit more. Alyssa Scolari [03:59]: And that has been the case that I have been finding with myself. Last week, we talked about cultivating safety in order to be able to do the trauma work. And the thing about EMDR is that is crucial. You need a sense of safety, because EMDR is intensive and it's very difficult. And that being said, it's also very short-term so it's not something where you're doing for years and years and years. But it's an intensive process. So, I've just been feeling lately like I want to do more to help my nervous system because I've come very far and I'm doing extremely well, but I still have all of these triggers that are just causing my nervous system to go haywire. Alyssa Scolari [04:49]: And it is becoming just a really big inconvenience for me to get triggered over a sound, over a site and then have flashbacks. And as much work as I've done, I feel like my brain is still on fire sometimes. So, I have really been feeling like over the last couple of months that now that I'm through my surgery and I'm recovering, I am ready to take my healing to a different level and to try this out. I also really want to try it because if it's something that I find is very effective, I am considering getting trained in it so I can help my clients. So, I am going to be starting EMDR this week and I'm really excited. I am going to be staying with the therapist that I currently have. Alyssa Scolari [05:43]: Now, the therapist I currently have is not trained in EMDR, but I am actually bringing on a second therapist and he's going to be more of a short-term therapist because he's the EMDR specialist. So, my first appointment is this week and I'm really excited and also really nervous, and I'm looking forward to bringing you all along on this journey. So, I will, of course, keep you all posted. We will see how it goes. I feel ready for it, I feel ready for this next step in my healing. Not that this step is any better or any worse than any of the other steps, if EMDR is not for you, that is totally fine. But I just think it's interesting to try to explore this option for healing. Why not? I'm in a place where I feel good and ready for it. Alyssa Scolari [06:37]: So, that is what is up for this week. I am excitedly and anxiously anticipating it and I thought that it would be helpful for both myself and everybody to relisten to this episode with Melissa, who is the EMDR specialist. She also is on TikTok. She's hysterical, but you will hear all about that in the episode. So, I hope you enjoy. I have found this episode fascinating. EMDR was a very convoluted topic for me and a very seemingly overwhelming type of therapy that I always stayed away from, I never really wanted to look at because it just seemed like too difficult or complex for me. But I think that this episode is really great because Melissa breaks it down and makes it more digestible. Alyssa Scolari [07:29]: So, I will stop talking now. Oh, no, I will not stop talking actually, because just a few housekeeping things. Please remember that for the entire month of March, we are donating to Ukraine. So, if you sign up to become a member on Patreon, whatever money that you donate for the first, for the month of March, is going to go directly to Doctors Without Borders to help with the efforts in Ukraine. I have my Patreon linked in the show notes and also of the Doctors Without Borders linked in the show notes so that you can check it out and see if it's something that you're interested in. Thank you so much to people who have already donated. This is so exciting. Alyssa Scolari [08:09]: I know that we're a pretty small platform so we're not going to be raising thousands and thousands of dollars, but honestly, any little bit helps and counts and is going to help people in Ukraine so much. So, I'm really excited about this. If you want to be a part of it and you want to donate, please go to the show notes. Again, if you become a Patreon member for the month of March, your first month's donations are going directly to Doctors Without Borders and I am also matching your donation. So, now, I will stop and I will let you get on with the episode where Melissa and I talk about EMDR. I have so much love for you all and I am holding you all on the light, and I'll be back again next week. intro music Alyssa Scolari:  Hey all what's up. Welcome to another episode of the Light After Trauma podcast. I'm your host, Alyssa Scolari. And we have here with us today, Melissa Parks. So you have Melissa and Alyssa, so it's going to be a good time. Melissa is an EMDR therapist, as well as a couples therapist. She is devoted to helping you stop the cycle of conflict in your relationships and to understand your nervous system in order to experience more joy, she has been using her expertise and her humor on social media to de-stigmatize mental health, you will often hear her use the phrase you make sense. So just a quick side note, I found Melissa on Tik-Tok. She is a bomb Tik-Tok maker. I thoroughly enjoy watching all of your Tik-Tok. So when she says that she uses humor as part of her therapy, she is not kidding. Her Tik-Toks are really funny and I really appreciate them. So, hi, Melissa. Welcome. And thank you for all that you do. Melissa Parks: Hey, I'm so glad to be here. Thank you so much for having me. It's a true honor. I'm excited. Alyssa Scolari:  I'm so excited for you to be here and to talk about a topic that quite honestly, I don't really know a whole lot about. So this is going to be a major learning experience for me as well as a lot of the listeners. So would you be able to share a little bit more on like what you do, who you are and could you break down that like gigantic acronym? That is EMDR. Melissa Parks:  Yes. Yes, absolutely. Well, like you so beautifully said, I am a therapist, a couples therapists, EMDR therapist. I do coaching. I do consultation. I do lots of things, but I treat clients in the state of South Carolina and I am so passionate about that. I came into the field and have been licensed for 17 years, and I still feel just as passionate, if not, even more passionate than I was when I first started, I really am on fire for all this stuff. In terms of EMDR trauma-focused stuff, attachment focused stuff. It's just my favorite. It's just one of my favorite things. So I'm excited to be able to talk about this today to maybe help bridge the understanding for folks because you know, it can be kind of, you know, intimidating when you just, the acronym, like you said, is a little intimidating: Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing. That's a mouthful. Alyssa Scolari:  Yes, it is. Melissa Parks:  It's like what is Well I'd love to take some time to explain some about it and then. Open up for questions. Definitely. But Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing is an evidence-based treatment model, which just means that it has extensive research and it's been proven .It has proven outcomes and way back when it was only used to treat trauma, but now we know that it can treat trauma, it can treat complex trauma, it can treat a myriad of issues, including distressing symptoms, like chronic depression, anxiety, just a whole host of things. So it's not just trauma. And it's based on a model that theorizes that our current symptoms are a result of unprocessed memories from our past that are showing up in our present. So for example, the brain may have had an experience from the past and it was unable to integrate all the components of that experience. And so what happens is our amazing nervous system comes up for us to protect us, to keep us sane and it fragments that experience into pieces. And that's what we see in our current day are those fragments of the experience as our symptoms. Overwhelming feelings, body sensations, whatever they are. That's what our symptoms are. That's what this EMDR model is based on. It's basically saying our past is in our present. Alyssa Scolari:  I gotcha. And when you say just to, and I don't mean to interrupt, I just had a quick thought, when you say unprocessed memories, do you mean repressed memories that are stored in our subconscious that haven't come to conscious, or could it be both, both repressed memories and suppressed memory. So things that we can recall, but just haven't really digested or integrated. Melissa Parks:  Right, right, right. I would say all the above, I would say all the above and when we're talking, you know, cause I would say all of us have unprocessed memories. So, I mean, we all do, but when it comes to trauma, that's a different story. When it comes to trauma, that's a little bit more in depth, a little bit more intense because with a trauma experience we have an experience that's too much, too soon, too much for too long or too little, for too long. So think like neglect. And in those situations, the signals from the amygdala, the fear center of the brain are so much, are so intense that the top part of our brain, which usually down-regulates and helps soothe that fear is gone. And this experience causes the integrative functions in the brain to fail. And so that's where we have that fragmenting that happens. So this is more of what, where I'm talking about the fragmented pieces as it relates to trauma. But yes, I think we all have unprocessed memories. The research talks about this and we learn about this when we're initially being trained in EMDR. Alyssa Scolari:  Wow. So, so what does that look like in practice? From what I understand, there's lots of, and this could just be one of my own myths or beliefs, there's lots of tapping that happens. Am I right on that one? Melissa Parks:  Yes, that's what EMDR is known for. But so before I go into that, which is really helpful. So with all that, I just said that, you know, we have these fragmented parts, these assimilated parts of a memory that are showing up in our present. This is why EMDR is so awesome because EMDR is a bottom up brain approach. It's a treatment of association. So it helps us associate those dissociated parts. And when, I mean, by bottom up, so a lot of treatments out there spend a lot of time in that top part of our brain, which is our more sophisticated part of our brain, which holds more of our thinking stuff, the way that we rationalize. And we think about things and those are helpful too. But if we have trauma. And if we have all these fragmented pieces that are coming up from our past, we can't think those away. Our body is taking over. And so EMDR comes to help us from the bottom part of the brain to help us associate those things and assimilate those things. And this is why, you know, it's really important to just put that out there and recognize the impact of EMDR from that perspective, how it treats the brain and how we integrate in that way. But that's what EMDR is known for is the tapping, right. Or the eye movements. Alyssa Scolari:  That's what I've always heard. Yeah, I'm sure that's only part of it. Yeah. I do want to just say for the listeners out there, you all won't be able to see this, but as Melissa was saying that, you know, talking about bringing these essentially disassociated or disconnected parts and connecting them, she was almost interlacing her fingers, which I think is a really great portrayal of what you're trying to say, which is we're taking all of these pieces and we're integrating them. It is like the full integration of the brain from a bottom up approach instead of surface level down approach. If I'm understanding that correctly. Melissa Parks:  Yes, you are 100%. And I think it's important to also note here is that EMDR is like a resilience model, which means it believes that we have everything that we need to heal. The clinician is just sort of the conductor and whatnot, but it believes that we are all wired with resilience and that something got in the way, right. Trauma, for example, got in the way and sort of rewired ourselves towards self protection instead of connection or these other things. But EMDR really operates out of this stance that you have what you need, and that resiliency is there and you are adaptive and we're going to work with all that, which is beautiful. And why I particularly love this model and that it's so trauma-informed and resilience based. Alyssa Scolari:  Yeah, that's very empowering. Very empowering. Melissa Parks:  It is very much though. So with the bilateral stimulation is what you're talking about. So the tapping or the eye movements, that's only, you know, that's not an all eight phases of EMDR because this is an eight phase model. So we're doing. Yes. Yes. And some clients come in, when are we going to do EMDR? And I'll say, well, we've been doing it ever since you came in because you know, part of EMDR also involves case conceptualization, taking a history, doing a treatment plan, which we're not doing tapping or bilateral stimulation through that. But that is typically what people think EMDR is moving the eyes and the tapping. And so I'm happy to talk about that piece because it is a pretty important piece. And it's probably what sort of separates EMDR from many of these other therapies, Alyssa Scolari:  Right, right. Because another therapies it's just primarily talk therapy unless you were doing, you know, neurofeedback or something of that sort. But... Melissa Parks:  RIght. Alyssa Scolari:  is more of like a, I don't know, it's like tapping into the brain. It sounds like. Melissa Parks:  No pun intended, right? Alyssa Scolari:  Right. I was going to say no pun intended, but pun fully intended, definitely tapping into the brain. Melissa Parks:  Yes. So treatment of EMDR really involves some procedures where number one, we are activating these old memories. By way of sensations, images, beliefs, feelings. So we want to activate that. And part of that involves this dual attention because we don't want to activate something like that and retraumatize you. We don't want to activate that and get you back into the memory where you're fully immersed in it, and it is overwhelming and it takes you outside of your window of tolerance. That is not what we want to happen, but we want to activate that where we have one foot in that past issue. And then we also have one foot in the present day where you're in the office with the client and or with the clinician. So one foot in the past one foot in the present. So we're activating the memory with all of those components. And then this is where we bring in the bilateral stimulation. And this is rhythmic side to side stimulation. Left ,right, left, right. And this is, by way of eye movements. So the clinician can wave their fingers in front of the eyes of the client that the eyes will pass the midline. We can use hand tapping. I have little buzzers where they hold the little buzzers and it kind of buzzes back and forth. You can do tones in the ears, but either way it's stimulating left, right, left, right. And this activates and integrates information from both sides of the brain. And so we have full brain integration. So we're setting up a state for the system to do what we wanted it to do. Back during the trauma, we're setting up a state for the system to bring those dissociated pieces together, associate them again in a safe way, and sometimes in a titrated way. Meaning we only take a little bit at a time because we don't want to overwhelm the client. And as a result, the old memory ends up being stored properly. The components of the memory are now timestamped appropriately. Cause remember I said, our symptoms are the past and the present. Well now when we set up this state and we help the brain integrate. Those parts can say: "Oh, we belong back here when I was 10, we don't belong here when I'm 30 anymore." So those old parts are now integrated (and) oriented to the correct time. And our distress is reduced about the whole situation. And we also take what is useful in terms of our thoughts about a memory, for example, It's over or unsafe now, or I am good ,or something. And then we can take that into our future and move forward. The results of this are just quite amazing, but ultimately we set up this state and we let the nervous system do its thing. Alyssa Scolari:  That is absolutely fascinating. Melissa Parks:  I know I got chills when I talk about it, even though I've done it so many times. Cause it's just so cool. Alyssa Scolari:  Yes, your passion for it is palpable. And just, as I'm listening to you talk, I think it's such a beautiful description. I have had it explained to me so many times, and I have to be honest. I still am, like, after somebody explains it to me and I'm still like, okay, but I don't get it. The way that you're putting it is incredible because there are so many times that I will say to not only my patients who I treat, but also to myself when I'm triggered is "Okay, are these feelings about the past, or are these feelings about the present?" And what EMDR does is it sounds like it gives your brain and your nervous system, the ability to be like,"Nope, this belongs, you know, for the time that we were enduring the abuse. This is what belongs in the present. This is what we're going to take into the future." Melissa Parks:  That's right. That's right. Alyssa Scolari:  That is incredible. Melissa Parks:  Yes. Yes. And this is what our brain wanted to do at that time. Right. It really did, but it couldn't. It's wired to, because that's part of what the hippocampus does. The hippocampus is the integrating function of the brain, but it couldn't. Because things were too much, too soon, too fast, too little for too long. Alyssa Scolari:  Way too much to process. Melissa Parks:  All those too Yes Yes yes yes And so but how beautiful is it that for our survival and for our sanity it knew something else to do, to fragment these pieces. It's beautiful Like my gosh. Our brains are incredible. That's the part where I love too, is like, You know, instead of looking at it from the pathological lens, it's like, no, this is amazing that our nervous system protected us in this way. Just amazing. Alyssa Scolari:  I love that you are saying this because I have been on such a soap box lately about pathology and how much I loathe it entirely, which I understand, you know, we need the DSM for some things, which for the listeners out there, the DSM is the book with all of the mental health disorders. But I'm just right on board with you where so much of what we experience is a result of our brain, trying to protect us, which is actually so normal and not pathological. Melissa Parks:  That's right. Agreed. 100%. Alyssa Scolari:  I am so passionate, so passionate about that. I'll get off my soap box now. But I have to ask. So what sparked your passion to get into this field and specifically like the EMDR niche? Melissa Parks:  Well, I feel like, so I, you know, I'm thinking like way back when I, you know, went into school, but I feel like for a lot of us clinicians out there, there's some clinicians that go into it because it's in the family or that kind of thing. Like we know somebody close to us that is a therapist or... I went in it to become more self-aware and to search for healing, because of my own childhood experiences and my own difficulties and my own trauma. And so that's probably, if I were to go right back to the brass tacks of it, of why I even started my journey towards becoming a therapist, that's where I would say it began. And I can't discount....I feel like there's a spiritual component there because I went into college when I was an itty-bitty, you know, teenager. And so it's hard to imagine that my teenage brain was like, Oh, let's do all of this. And, you know, cause that's just not the case. My prefrontal cortex wasn't even completely developed. So I feel like there's a spiritual component there for me, at least that there was a pathway for this for me, but I definitely had that passion to want to learn about myself and why I was the way I was and what was happening there. And then turning that around to:I want to help others. I want to help others see, like we just said, this non-pathological lens that there is nothing wrong with you. In fact, you have done the best that you can. And so that's where a lot of my passion comes. And then probably in terms of, EMDR where I was first introduced to that. I was almost fresh out of grad school and my supervisor did EMDR. Now, of course, this was like almost 20 years ago and EMDR has changed a little bit over the years. And so back then it was kind of like this like woo-woo sorta thing, but she just amazed me and the way that she saw these results with her clients. And so my interest was sparked way back then and I started learning little bits and pieces along the way. And of course, once I had my own training and my certification and all that stuff, like, that was it. But I also have a love for attachment. So I'd also do couples therapy too. And that is why I also make attachment a huge part of my EMDR treatment as well. So I do a lot of attachment focused EMDR too. Alyssa Scolari:  You can incorporate EMDR in couples work as well? Melissa Parks:  Okay. I've not treated couples with both of them in the room with EMDR. I think there's probably, maybe some people that do that. But there have been times where I'm working with a couple and we realized that there are some things that are at play here that trace back to trauma that are really impeding our progress in order to create a secure bond. And so in that case, we may branch off and do a little bit of EMDR for each or one of the components of the couple and then return. Alyssa Scolari: Okay, that makes a lot of sense. Melissa Parks:  But when I say attachment focused EMDR, I'm talking a lot about people that have PTSD, so childhood trauma or developmental trauma, and we really need to bring in that attachment perspective to the EMDR work. Alyssa Scolari: Yes, because it's almost, you know, if you do have complex PTSD, it is almost impossible. Nothing's impossible, but it is extremely, extremely difficult to be able to have a functional relationship when you have not worked through... Melissa Parks:  yeah. Yeah, Alyssa Scolari:  ...the attachment. You know, even having been in my own treatment for... how many years now? I don't know. Well, multiple years at this point, I still have those triggers that come up about abandonment. And so I can only imagine. Melissa Parks:  Rection. Yeah absolutely. Yes. Alyssa Scolari:  Rejection in what I think other people might feel are just like the silliest ways. That's like, well, what do you mean you're going to go play video games with your friends? Melissa Parks:  And there it is the past and the present. Right? There it is. Alyssa Scolari:  So EMDR I have heard, and maybe you can speak a little bit on this. Somebody had mentioned it in one of my previous podcasts, and then I've had a couple of colleagues talk about this, that it can be a very, very exhausting process. So can you speak a little bit on that? Like how is it draining? Why so draining? What are your thoughts on that? Melissa Parks:  Yeah, I have plenty of clients that will say to me, I have to clear my schedule after our session and or creating our next appointment time, I want to make sure that I'm doing it where I have nothing for the rest of the day. I mean, this can be a common experience. And then often, you know, if I have somebody that comes in that has something to do in that afternoon, we might really talk about whether or not we want to go into that... ...Phase Four, which is the desensitization using the bilateral stimulation because yeah, it can be draining. I mean, I think just the thought of going back into an experience and going back into an experience that our body and our system tries so hard not to, I mean, that alone kind of like speaks to probably the reasons why you might feel so drained afterward. Alyssa Scolari:  Yes cause you are having to actively revisit your trauma. So I suppose that speaks to the importance that like the decision to pursue EMDR is not a decision that one should make sort of like Willy nilly. Like I have 95 other thousand things going on in my life right now. But I'm going to jump into EMDR. Like not a good idea. Melissa Parks:  Yes. Yes. And I would also say that sometimes can be par for the course, but also knowing that if we've spent a lot of time in Phase Two, which is the preparation phase, this is where we're setting ourselves up for how do we deal with the aftermath of this so that we're not pushed out of our window of tolerance after our session. We know. Okay,, I know some things that I can do to help regulate my nervous system. If I start to feel myself kind of getting amped up again or things I can do to help contain it, if I feel triggered and, or sort of distract myself in a healthy way, that's not dissociative or we're working with the parts that might come up and we have identified things that we can do in the event that afterward we do feel really drained or we do fear feel really triggered. And so that can make a huge difference. Alyssa Scolari:  Yes, setting up a before plan and after plan, making sure that the safety and all of the tools are put in place. Melissa Parks:  That's right. That's right. Cause you know, we really have to, we really have to recognize the importance of, and the nature of this work. We are treating very vulnerable parts within the client and we want to really focus on the importance of that and the sensitivity of that. We do not want to re-traumatize or we don't want to you know, so it's really important for the clinician to, you know, take a really good history to really assess the client for all of these things that could potentially be problematic and to empower the client to set up skills if needed, like all of this stuff should be done on the forefront. So it's not all up to the client to say, "Oh, well, I shouldn't choose this" because there are things that we can do together to make sure that in the event it is draining or it is triggering. You can still feel like you have agency over yourself and over the situation. Alyssa Scolari:  I think that what you're saying is so important because it also speaks to I think the significance of finding a therapist who is well equipped to be able to see you through this process. You know, this is not something that you want to walk in. Unfortunately, I do have two clients now who I've ended up seeing after walking into a therapist's office who is certified in EMDR and during the first session, they went into the bilateral stimulation, Melissa Parks:  That's Yeah. Yep. You got it. Alyssa Scolari: They did that the first session, the first time meeting this person, and as a result, were really, really unraveled is the word I'm lookin for. Melissa Parks:  Oh, sure. For sure. It's concerning to say the least. I'm so sorry that that happened for your client because essentially what that also does too, is the client is not sort of, I don't want to say shutdown, but if the session isn't closed down properly and or if they are pushed outside of their window of tolerance, It's not repaired. It's not corrected. What does that do? That confirms that old experience that you are not safe. And as a result, like I said, kind of an experience of retraumatization and that is really unfortunate. That's really unfortunate. Alyssa Scolari:  Yeah, I think that is very unfortunate and that is not the norm. You know, that is what I'm hearing you say. Melissa Parks:  I would hope so. I would hope so. Alyssa Scolari:  Right. We hope and pray that that's not the norm. It is important, what I hear you say, to be able to establish that rapport with the client, to be able to do a full assessment, to be able to create a sense of safety so that the vulnerability can be there so that the healing process and the integration can begin. Melissa Parks:  So there's things that the client can do, certainly. And when I'm hearing you kind of talk about...the client can ask the questions upfront. When searching for a therapist, the client can find someone that they feel comfortable with. Do like a consultation maybe, and ask the questions. What kind of clients do you treat? What is your specialty? I'm not going to go if I have attachment trauma and I'm an adult and I'm struggling with my current relationships. I might not go to somebody who does EMDR, specially only with maybe children. For example, I would want to know that they've worked with adults with PTSD. So, you know, finding out what are you specialize in. What are your advanced trainings? How long have you been doing this? Are you trained or are you certified? Asking those questions, but ultimately, you know, a lot of this lies on the clinician. And their expertise and their ability to, like I said, get a good assessment. Conceptualize the client's case, attunement t is huge because... Alyssa Scolari:  What do you mean by that? Melissa Parks:  I might come in as a client, gung-ho, saying, "I want to do this EMDR stuff." "I love it so much. I'm ready." And yet the next session, another part of them comes out that is terrified. And sort of step in the presence of the room and is terrified. And yet, instead of asserting, "Hey, I'm scared about this," sort of just uses people-pleasing behaviors with the therapist and the therapist is not attuned to these little shifts of maybe a client's presentation or body movements or tone of voice or anything like that, and just runs with it. Again, we're at the risk of retraumatization or creating an unsafe experience. The clinician's level of attunement is so key and being able to, like I said, taking that full history, Oh, you know what? This client has used fawning, for example, which is like extreme people-pleasing in their relationships in the past. I want to note that for myself, I want to make sure that I'm watching for this in our sessions in the future. Because even if I ask a question, "Would you like to talk about this? "They're going to say "Yeah" all the time, because they fawn and so attunement is so huge, huge, huge, and that's on the clinician and their ability to do that. That's not the client's responsibility because a client who fawns is never going to say,"I'm feeling like I want to people-please, you right now." They're never going to say that. Alyssa Scolari:  No, they're just going to do it. That's part of their trauma response, especially when they're activated. Melissa Parks:  That's right? Alyssa Scolari:  So this is a lot in a very heavy process for both the client and the clinician. Melissa Parks:  Yes. It's a dance. Alyssa Scolari:  Do you ever find that it's exhausting for you as the clinician? Melissa Parks:  It could potentially be, but I have good supervision. I think the best clinicians, even the ones that are, you know, have all the certifications in the world get supervision. And so I get supervision and so I have a place to bring my stuff and I have pretty good self care. I also, you know, do things behind the scenes, like structure my day appropriately. I do not have a huge caseload because of not only the nature of the clients that I see, the majority I'm doing EMDR or couples work, couples work is also very intense because you would have two nervous systems in the room with you. Alyssa Scolari: Yes. Melissa Parks:  You're trying to navigate that. So I do not see a ton of people. All of that really, I have learned, sets me up to not feel that burnout or that exhaustion. Alyssa Scolari:  You've learned how to take really good care of yourself. Melissa Parks:  Yeah. But there's days, you know, cause I'm a human Alyssa Scolari: Of course, therapists are human too. Melissa Parks:  Right. Alyssa Scolari: Absolutely. But I love the comment that you said about having supervision, because my supervisor says this all the time, which is every good clinician has a great mentor, therapist, et cetera. Melissa Parks:  Good. Yes. You need to go to therapy too. I'm a believer in that. Alyssa Scolari:  Yes. I love my therapist. Yup. Yep. Now there's also been some myths, I think about EMDR that it's sort of this like, cure all. So could you speak on that? Like, and I guess maybe this is different for every person, but what is the length of the process and then like, how do you know that you've gotten to a point where like EMDR is no longer needed or is it a lifelong process? Melissa Parks:  I wouldn't say lifelong, but I think it's not a magic thing. It's not magic or a cure-all fix-all kind of thing. No, no, no, no, no, definitely not. But I do think that it can be helpful. Like I said almost all of my individuals that I see I'm doing EMDR with because we have to remember EMDR is not just about the Phase Four desensitization piece. Sometimes with some clients I'm just using resource tapping, which is basically strengthening positive things that they bring into session. To strengthen a positive neural network in their brain. So if someone comes in and says, "Oh, I was a good mom this week, I had such good interactions with my kids." I'll say "You want to tap that in? That sounds like it's really important. Like we really want to strengthen that." Alyssa Scolari:  I saw you make a Tik-Tok about that. Melissa Parks:  That's right. That's part of EMDR too. That's resource tapping and that's a component of EMDR too. And so if we're not doing all eight phases, it's still EMDR. And so I look at it from that perspective. In terms of really targeting a trauma or a series of traumas, if it's complex PTSD, it could take a long time. The research says that EMDR is more of a shorter model than say some other like traditional talk therapies, but I'd hate to put a timeline on it. I mean, I've, I've seen people that have single incident traumas and we've done maybe eight sessions, ten sessions, twelve sessions, and they actually feel like this is so helpful. I'm good now. Thank you. Bye. And that's been great, but typically I'm working with people with complex trauma and we're in it for the long haul. Alyssa Scolari:  Okay. I was just going to say, it sounds more to me like EMDR is a treatment approach, like in its entirety and not something that you decide like... Melissa Parks:  Yes, you get it. Alyssa Scolari:  Does that make sense? Melissa Parks:  Yes. That is exactly how I use it. And how I don't look at it as just an intervention. Alyssa Scolari:  Right? Like it's not a supplement therapy. It is a treatment modality. Melissa Parks:  That is exactly how I approach it and how I incorporate it into my practice. And not everybody is like this. I mean, some clinicians are just trained in it and they just use it here or there occasionally, but that's not how I roll. And maybe it's just because I'm in love with it all, but yeah. I really use it as how a lens that I see my clients through because of all the components of it that we talked about in the beginning, based on the model that the past is in the present, the resiliency aspect of it, the bottom up approach. That's how I see my clients through that lens. And this is why this works for me in terms of a modality. So yes, that's right. It's not just an intervention to me. Alyssa Scolari:  Yeah, this is a treatment lens for you. Which I think is potentially why I bet you have so much success because the treatment of trauma really is recovery is a lifelong process, especially when it comes to trauma survivors. So I would imagine that if we're coining anything in some like eight week or twelve week intervention, it's not going to be as effective. Melissa Parks:  Right. Right. Agreed. Alyssa Scolari:  I love it. I learned so much about EMDR. This actually makes me want to, I don't know. This makes me definitely want to explore more. Melissa Parks:  Nice. Alyssa Scolari:  And so I have to ask because your Tik-Toks are amazing. How did you... Melissa Parks:  I get a little...I'm laughing cause I can get my sense of humor can come out there. I can have a little too much fun on there. Alyssa Scolari:  They're so funny. I love them. I show them to my husband. Melissa Parks:  Give me an Office audio, and I will roll with it. I will make it into something. I just love The Office. And if there's any audio on The Office, it's happening, it's going down. Alyssa Scolari:  It's going down. I love it so much. How did you get into, like, how did you decide like, Oh, this is what I'm going to do. Melissa Parks:  well, I've been on Instagram a few years probably, and I just decided to take the leap. Alyssa Scolari: Making those Tik-Toks at the rate that you put them out has got to be a second full-time job for you. I feel like they're hard. Melissa Parks:  Well, they are, I'm pretty, I'm slightly, not slightly. I'm pretty aware of like, not aware, but I can work my phone pretty good. And I'm not doing like major edits, so they don't take me too long. But I think it's just my, I think it's my imagination. I hear something like a sound or, and I'm like, Oh my gosh, this fits so perfectly with this. Or this is how a couple would react or this is what would happen in the brain and how the brain would talk to each other like that. It just comes to me with hearing these sounds. Alyssa Scolari:  Yeah. It's like, it seems looking at your profile and your content, very much of a creative outlet for you. And I would guess a way to also spread awareness. Melissa Parks: That's right. And I cannot tell you how many emails or messages I've received saying "Because of you. I decided to find a therapist" or "Because of you. I feel like I make sense. And I'm going to talk more about what's happening with my therapist" or" just because of you..." and that gives me fire and motivation to just keep going for sure. You know, I'm going to kind of change up how we see ourselves, how we see mental health and that's important. Alyssa Scolari:  and you are doing that and you very much send the message on your content, on all of your platforms. Cause I believe I also follow you on Instagram that it's not what's wrong with you. It's what happened to you. Melissa Parks:  Yes. Alyssa Scolari:  And I love that you put that vibe out there. Melissa Parks:  Yeah. Yeah. Thank you. Alyssa Scolari:  So healing. Melissa Parks:  Yeah, thank you. Alyssa Scolari:  So your Tik-Tok is...what's your Tik-Tok username? It's melissa_parks_says, right. Melissa Parks: [00:39:06] No, just melissaparkssays, all one (word) and it's the same for my Instagram: melissaparkssays Alyssa Scolari:  and then you have a website as well, right? Melissa Parks:  Yeah, the website, it is for my therapy practice. That's melissaparkstherapy.com. And yeah, I'll be doing some things in terms of more of that coaching piece, probably more towards summertime, and I'll be opening up some opportunities for EMDR therapists that want to be certified to do some consultation under me if they want to. So that would be important to maybe find me on social media for that. And I'm looking at some potentially courses or some kind of like membership sites so that people can work with me outside of that therapy treatment perspective. And of course, that's only for those that do not need the structure of therapy. That's very important to make sure that we delineate that. Alyssa Scolari: Ooo, you have some exciting things coming up in your future. Melissa Parks:  Yeah. Alyssa Scolari:  I'm excited for you. Oh, that's so fun. Well, I will link all of your socials on the show notes. So to all the listeners out there, you will know exactly where it should go to find more of Melissa's amazing content. Thank you for breaking down the scary beast that is EMDR, because it has really been quite frightening to me, but I feel like I have a really good grasp on it now. And it's not so scary. Melissa Parks:  I'm so glad. I'm so glad. And of course I'd be open to any and all questions for clarifying anything further. I'd be happy to come on again or whatever. It's been such a joy. So thank you for having me.

How will the battle for the Dark Tower end? Will it end? Will we just be trapped in an endless cycle of tower related violence? Oh, and who kisses who? Or is it whom? Whom kisses whom? Nope, that ain't it! Episode Notes: Indy is Freya the Rogue, Alana is Morrigan the Sorcerer, Stacey is Kaa'Riin the Bearbarian, and Cory is your DM. Website: www.girlswhodontdnd.com Email: girlswhodontdnd@gmail.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/girlswhodontdnd/ Facebook: https://fb.me/GirlswhodontDnD Twitter: https://twitter.com/girlswhodontdnd Shop: https://artofwhere.com/artists/ye-olde-shenanigans  Intro Music: "It's just three girls" - Mia Stegner  Outro Music: 'Don't worry about them" - Mia Stegner  Logo Artwork: Sam Garbett and Cory  Special guest voices:   Music and effects:  Full attribution on our website

Sometimes we draw a line to delineate a boundary - this is what I need/can't do for my personal health.  And sometimes we draw a line saying "Nope. No more. I won't go on. I won't be vulnerable in this area. I'm good here no matter what. I will die on this hill." Nicole tells the story of an old friend who recently talked about that "not crossing this line of vulnerability" experience and how it played out in their life. Keli talks about her struggle with financial stubbornness and her recent decision to cross her imaginary line into more financial responsibility.  The ladies also tell about their most recent "Coven Weekend" and what they were up to.

We are told that our babies need to get on a schedule. They need to fit into our life and our world. The thing is, that's NOT the way that it's meant to be. Find how you can support and connect with your child AND get everyone better sleep. Will it be on YOUR timeline? NOPE, not always but it will be worth it and better for you AND your baby.  Book Rec: Safe Infant Sleep: Expert Answers to Your Cosleeping Questions by James J. McKenna & Alison Kreckmann  

#213: Do I have to wait until my baby has teeth to offer solids? Nope!..And although teething is often a time when babies begin to experience a change, it is really not necessary to make any drastic adjustments to solid foods during the teething process. In this episode I discuss the idea that having teeth is not a prerequisite for introducing solids and share some recommendations for teething babies who are ready to begin their baby-led weaning journey!     Get your copy of the 100 FIRST FOODS list on Katie's free BABY-LED WEANING FOR BEGINNERS workshop: https://babyledweaning.co/workshop   Follow @babyledweanteam on IG: https://www.instagram.com/babyledweanteam/   Shownotes with all the links mentioned in this episode are here: https://blwpodcast.com/213   Learn something you liked in this episode? Would you kindly subscribe, rate and review where you're seeing this? (...it really helps other parents find this BLW info too!)

The homies reconverge and catch up after the events of the Blanket Fort! We get deep with a smidge of waifu talk and a ton about symbolism in movies, eugenics, nature vs nurture and much more! 1- Blanket Fort party 2- Ivan's healing tips 3- Calling friends vs text 6- natural talk like a work talk 9- best female protagonist Dandadan 14- what makes a waifu 16- diving into horror 18- Get Out and Jordan Peele movie 23- symbolism and theories in movies 26- human inventions 28- ethics of keeping animals alive 33- iq tests as human grades 39- types of intelligence 45- nature vs nurture 53- Dunning Kruger 56- memory 1:01- emotional awareness 1:11- online emotions

ok wait wait, before you scroll past: this is somehow still a fun episode.i know, that sounds bad, and it might actually be bad, but it's true lmao ANTSY PRODUCTS: https://antsyproducts.com/Use code "BIGBOY" for 10% off your purchase! Aya Lehman: https://twitter.com/ayalhmnKevin Cookman: https://twitter.com/KevinCookmanContact/Mailbag: ayavsthebigboys@gmail.com A Merry-Go-Round Magazine Podcast: https://merrygoroundmagazine.com/Support Merry-Go-Round Magazine!: https://www.patreon.com/mgrm 

Wyoming Promise purports to be a Wyoming born and bred political advocacy organization.  But are they really?  Nope, they are just another deceptive outside group with some pretty amazing funding sources.  And there's a fairly prominent Wyoming politician that sits on their board.

This week our comrade Mary Ann was off, so Natasha and Alex teamed up with Grace on the dials to chat through the week's biggest news. Here's what our dynamic got into:Webflow's new round: Nine-figures of capital at a revenue multiple north of 40x? What is this, 2021? Nope, just the latest capital infusion for the no-code website company.All Raise's new CEO: The work of diversifying the venture capital market is far from over, and one group working to move the needle not only has plans to change the industry -- but also her own team.Funds: Natasha's coverage of fund-of-funds fit into news that SoftBank is turning one if its funds into an evergreen-vehicle, and Alex chatted through the numbers about Series A, B, and C rounds in the United States. Funds are maturing, experimenting and evolving into interesting vehicles. Maybe it's time we start covering them more on the show again (and check out our latest Wednesday episode for a Tiger Global-themed chat)What to know about China: From crashing stock prices to rocketing stock prices, it's been a week for Chinese equities. And startups appear increasingly caught in the crossfire.And then, crypto: From news about a hot new crypto deal to NFTs coming to Instagram, it feels impossible to avoid the blockchain world these days.We are back next week with our full team, and a live show. So, chat you Monday, Wednesday, and Thursday live!

SUMMARY: Overcoming Health Anxiety is possible! Today, we interview Ken Goodman and his client Maria on overcoming hpyochondria using Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. In this episode of Your Anxiety Toolkit Podcast, you will learn key concepts of health anxiety and how to overcome their health anxiety. In This Episode: What it is like to have health anxiety The key concepts of treating Hypochondria Tips for managing fears of death and cancer. A step-by-step approach to overcoming health anxiety. Links To Things I Talk About: https://www.kengoodmantherapy.com/ Quiet Mind Solutions ERP School: https://www.cbtschool.com/erp-school-lp Episode Sponsor: This episode of Your Anxiety Toolkit is brought to you by CBTschool.com. CBTschool.com is a psychoeducation platform that provides courses and other online resources for people with anxiety, OCD, and Body-Focused Repetitive Behaviors. Go to cbtschool.com to learn more. Spread the love! Everyone needs tools for anxiety... If you like Your Anxiety Toolkit Podcast, visit YOUR ANXIETY TOOLKIT PODCAST to subscribe free and you'll never miss an episode. And if you really like Your Anxiety Toolkit, I'd appreciate you telling a friend (maybe even two). EPISODE TRANSCRIPTION This is Your Anxiety Toolkit - Episode 226. Welcome back, everybody. If you have health anxiety, hypochondria, health anxiety disorder, or you know of somebody who has health anxiety, you are going to love this episode. I mean, love, love, love this episode. Today, we have Ken Goodman, who's on the show. He's a clinician who's here with his patient and they're sharing a success story, a recovery story of health anxiety, and it is so good. I am so honored to have both of them on. It was so fun to actually interview other people and the way they're doing it, and look at the steps that were taken in order to overcome health anxiety. And this is the overcoming health anxiety story of all stories. It is so, so good. I'm not going to waste your time going and telling you how good it is. I'm just going to let you listen to it because I know you're here to get the good stuff. Before we do that, I wanted to do the “I did a hard thing” and this one is from Dave. It says: “I've been trying to get back into meditating regularly. I was sitting at a desk this morning, reviewing my work emails. And I told myself, before I get even further in my day, I need to meditate. I did a guided meditation, even though I felt a strong pull inside to go back to work. I kept getting caught up in my thoughts, but I just kept telling myself it doesn't need to be a perfect meditation. I said the goal today is just to be able to sit without being busy for three minutes. Nothing more. It was hard, but I did it.” Dave, thank you so much for the submission of the “I did a hard thing” segment, because I think that meditation is so important. In fact, I keep promising myself I'm going to implement it more into this podcast. And Dave has really looked at some of the struggles people have with meditation. And look at him, go, it's so amazing. Totally did it. So amazing. Dave, thank you so, so, so much. I love it. If you want to submit, you may submit your “I did a hard thing” by going to KimberleyQuinlan-lmft.com. If you go to the podcast page, there is a submission page right on the website. And from there, let's just go straight to the show. I hope you enjoy it. Kimberley: Welcome. I am so excited for this episode. Welcome, Ken and welcome, Maria. Ken: Thank you for having me. Maria: Hi, Kimberley. Kimberley: So, as you guys, we've already chatted, but I really want to hear. This is really quite unique and we get to see the perspective of a client and the therapist. If I could do one of these every single week, I would. I think it's so cool. So, thank you so much for coming on and sharing. We're going to talk about health anxiety. And so, Maria, we're going to go back and forth here, but do you want to share a little bit about your experience with health anxiety? Maria: Yes. I think I've had health anxiety probably for like 15, 20 years and not known about it. Looking back now, everything comes clear when you see the multiple pictures that you've taken of certain lumps and whatever five years ago. I'm like, “Oh my gosh, I have so many pictures that I've taken and so many different things.” But yeah, I've been struggling for a while I think, and had multiple doctor's appointments. Until I realized that I had health anxiety, it was an everyday struggle, I think. Ken: Well, you came to me and you were mostly worried at the time about ticks and Lyme disease and skin cancer, but you told me that for the previous 15 years or so, you were worried about other things. What are those things? Maria: Well, I was mostly completely obsessed with moles on my skin and them being cancerous. And I was scared of ticks. I would not be able to walk through any grass or go hiking. I was scared that I would have to check my whole body to make sure that there were no ticks on me. I was completely scared of Lyme disease, and it just completely consumed my life really. And they were the main things. But looking back before that, I think that I always had a doctor's appointment on the go. I would book one, and as soon as they said, “You can book online,” That was it for me. I would have one booked, and then I'd go, “Oh, what if there's something else next week? You know what, I'm just going to book one for next week, just in case something comes up.” I am a terrible person when it comes to that because I'm taking up multiple doctor's appointments. And I knew that. But it was trying to reassure myself, trying to control the situation, trying to control next week already before it even happened. So, yeah. MARIA'S SYMPTOMS OF HEALTH ANXIETY Kimberley: Right. What did it look like for you? What did a day look like for you pre-treatment and pre-recovery? Maria: Some days it could be fine. I remember days where nothing was bothering me. It was such a nice feeling. And then I was scared because I never knew what was going to trigger me and it could be anything at any time. And I think that was the not knowing. And then as soon as I would latch onto something, I would come to the phone, I'd start Googling over and over again, hours of Googling and then checking. And then it was just ongoing. And then my whole day, I was in my head my whole day, just what if, what if, asking questions, going back to Google, trying to find that reassurance that of course never happened. Ken: Yeah. You tell me that you would take pictures of your moles and then compare them with the cancerous moles online and do those things. Maria: Yeah. And I would book-- and interestingly enough, looking back now, I went through a phase of always having a doctor's appointment. And then I also went through a phase of completely avoiding the doctor as well, not wanting to go because I didn't want them to say something that I knew was going to trigger a whole host of anxiety. So, I've gone through multiple doctors. And then once you start the doctor's appointments, then you're on a roller coaster. Because you walk away from that appointment, never feeling, or for me, never feeling reassured. Or feeling reassured for maybe a few minutes, and then you leave, and then the anxiety kicks in. “Oh, I never asked them this,” or “Oh my gosh, well, what did that mean?” And then the what-ifs start again and you're back to square one. So then, you go, “Oh, no, I didn't try just what they said. I'm going to book another appointment and this doctor is going to be the doctor that reassures me.” MANAGING DOCTOR VISITS WITH HYPOCHONDRIA Kimberley: Right. Or sometimes a lot of clients will say to me like, “The doctor made a face. What did that face mean? They made a look and it was just for a second, but were they questioning their own diagnosis and so forth?” And I think that is really common as well. Ken: Well, the doctor will say anything and it could be something very simple like, “Okay, you're all good. I'll see you in six months.” And the person will leave thinking, “Why would he want me to come back in six months if nothing was wrong?” Maria: Well, that's interesting that you would say that because I think probably at my lowest point, I was keeping notes about my thought process and what I was feeling when I was actually going to the doctors or waiting for the results. And actually, I thought it might-- if I have a few minutes to read what I actually was going through in real-time, I know it's probably very relatable. Kimberley: I would love that. Maria: I had gone to basically a doctor's appointment, an annual one where I knew I was going to have to have blood tests. And they're the worst for me because the anticipation of getting the results is just almost worse than getting the results, even though-- Ken: Did you write this before we met? Maria: No. While I was seeing you, Ken. Ken: In the beginning? Maria: Yeah. When you'd asked me to write down everything and write down what I was feeling, what I was thinking, and then read it back to myself. And this is what I had written down, actually, when I was going through the doctor's appointment and waiting or had just gotten the results. Kimberley: If you would share, that'd be so grateful. Maria: So, my blood results came back today. I felt very nervous about opening them. The doctor wrote a note at the top. “Your blood results are mostly normal. Your cholesterol is slightly high, but no need for medication. Carry on with exercise and healthy eating.” “Mostly,” what does that mean? “Mostly”? I need to look at all the numbers and make sure that everything is in the normal range. “Okay, they're all in the normal range except for my cholesterol. But why does she write mostly? Is there something else that she's not telling me? I need reassurance. I'm driving down to the doctor's right now. I can't wait the whole weekend.” I go into the doctor's office and ask them, “Is there a doctor who's able to explain to me my results?” The receptionist said, “No, you have to make another appointment.” I explained to her, “You don't understand. I just need somebody to tell me that everything is normal.” Finally, this nice lady saw the anxiety on my face. She calls the doctor over to look at the labs. The receptionist shows the doctor the one lab panel, and he says, “Everything is completely normal. Nothing was flagged. Everything is completely fine.” I thank him so much for looking and walk away. As soon as I get outside, I realize I didn't ask him to look at all the lab panels. What if she meant mostly normal on the other lab panels that I didn't show him? When I get home, I look over each one multiple times and make sure that each one is in the exact number range. After looking over them four or five times and seeing that each one is in the number range except for my cholesterol, I still feel like I need to have her explain to me why she wrote the word “mostly.” The crazy thing is I'm not concerned about the high cholesterol. I can control that. I don't know what she meant by the word “mostly.” I'm going to send her a message. And I'm going to ask her to clarify. I have to believe that she would tell me if something was wrong. I wish there was an off button in my head to stop me worrying about this. Ken: I remember this now. I remember. And this was in the middle. Maria was really avoiding going to the doctor and she had overdue with some physical exams. And so, we really worked hard for her to stop avoiding that. She got to the point where she felt good enough about going to the doctor. And she really, I think I remember her not having any anticipatory anxiety, handling the doctor very well, host the doctor very well, until she got the email and focused on the word “mostly.” And that sent her spiraling out of control. But the interesting thing about that whole experience was that we processed it afterwards, and that whole experience motivated her to try even harder. And then she took even bigger strides forward. And within a couple of months, she was really doing so much better. And I think it's been over a year now since that and continues to do really well. Kimberley: Yeah. Thank you so much for sharing that. I actually was tearing up. Tears were starting to come because I was thinking, I totally get that experience. I'm so grateful you shared it because I think so many people do, right? Maria: Yeah. And there's always and/or. You go into the doctor's appointment, they tell you everything. And because your adrenaline is absolutely pumping, you forget everything. And then you come out and you go, “Oh my gosh, I can't remember anything.” Then the anxiety kicks in and tells you what the anxiety is like, “Oh no, that must have been bad. That must have been--” yeah. Ken: And that boost in adrenaline that just takes over is so powerful. You can forget any common sense or any therapeutic strategies or tools that you might have learned because now you just get preoccupied with one word, the uncertainty of that word. Maria: Yeah. I would have to have a family member come in, my husband to come in and sit in the-- it got to that point where he would have to come in and sit in the appointment, so then after the appointment, I could have him retell me what was said, because I knew as soon as the adrenaline kicked in, I would not be able to remember anything. ROADBLOCKS TO HEALTH ANXIETY TREATMENT Kimberley: Right. Ken, this brings me straight to the next question, which would be like, what roadblocks do you commonly see patients hit specifically if they have health anxiety during recovery or treatment? Ken: Well, unlike other fears and phobias, the triggers for health anxiety are very unpredictable. So, if you have a fear of elevators, flying or public speaking, you know when your flight is going to be, you know when you have to speak or you know when you have to drive if you have a fear of driving. For health anxiety, you never know when you're going to be triggered. And those triggers can be internal, like a physical sensation, because the body is very noisy. And everyone experiences physical sensations periodically and you never know when that's going to happen. And then you never know external triggers. You never know when the doctor is going to say something that might trigger you, or you see a social media post about a GoFundMe account about someone that you know who knows someone who's been diagnosed with ALS. So, you never know when these things are going to happen. And so, you might be doing well for a couple of weeks or even a month, and suddenly there's a trigger and you're right back to where you started from. And so, in that way, it feels very frustrating because you can do well and then you can start becoming extremely anxious again. Another roadblock I think might be if you need medicine, there's a fear of trying medicine because of potential for side effects and becomes overblown and what are the long-term side effects, and even if I take it, I'm going to become very anxious. And so, people then are not taking the very thing, the medicine that could actually help them reduce their anxiety. So, that's another roadblock. Kimberley: Yeah. I love those. And I think that they're by far the most hurdles. And Maria, you could maybe even chime in, what did you feel your biggest roadblock to recovery was? Maria: Being okay with the unknown. Trying to be in control all the time is exhausting and trying to constantly have that reassurance and coming to terms with, “It's okay if I can't control everything. It's okay if I don't get the 100% reassurance that I need. It's good enough,” that was hard for me. And also, not picking up the phone and Googling was the biggest. I think once I stopped that and I was okay with not looking constantly, that was a huge step forward. Ken: You really learn to live with uncertainty. And I think you start to understand that if you had to demand 100% certainty, you had to keep your anxiety disorder. In order to be 100% certain, that meant keep staying anxious. Kimberley: Yeah. Being stuck in that cycle forever. Ken: You didn't want that anymore. You wanted to focus on living your life rather than being preoccupied with preventing death. SKILLS AND TOOLS TO OVERCOME HEALTH ANXIETY Kimberley: Right. So, Maria, I mean, that's probably, from my experience as a clinician, one of the most important skills, the ability to tolerate and be uncertain. Were there other specific tools that you felt were really important for your recovery at the beginning and middle and end, and as you continue to live your life? Maria: Yes. I think the biggest one was me separating my anxiety from myself, if that makes sense. Seeing it as a separate-- I don't even know, like a separate entity, not feeling like it was me. I had to look at it as something that was trying to control me, but I was fine. I needed to fight the anxiety. And separating it was hard in the beginning. But then I think once I really can help me to understand how to do that, at that point, I think I started to move forward a bit more. Kimberley: So, you externalized it. For me, I give it a name like Linda. “Hi, Linda,” or whatever name you want to give your anxiety. A lot of kids do that as well like Mr. Candyman or whatever. Maria: Yeah. It sat on my shoulder and try to get in my head. In the beginning, I would be brushing off my shoulder constantly. Literally, I must have looked crazy because I was brushing this anxiety off my shoulder every 10 minutes with another what-if. What if this? What if that? And I think I had to retrain my brain. I had to just start not believing and being distracted constantly by the “What if you do this” or “What if that?” and I'd say, “No, no.” Ken: Yeah. I'd treat a lot of health anxiety. I have a lot of health anxiety groups. And I do notice that the patients that can externalize their anxiety and personify it do way better than the people who have trouble with it. And so, whether it's a child or a teenager or an adult, I am having them externalize their anxiety. And I go into that, not only in my groups, but in the audio program I created called the Anxiety Solution Series. It is all about how to do that. And it makes things so much easier. If now you're not fighting with yourself, there's no internal struggle anymore because now you're just competing against an opponent who's outside of you. It makes things easier. Kimberley: Right. Yeah. And sometimes when that voice is there and you believe it to be you, it can make you feel a little crazy. But when you can externalize it, it separates you from that feeling of going crazy as well. Maria: I felt so much better as soon as I did that because I felt, “Okay, I think I can fight this. This isn't me. I'm not going crazy. This is something that I--” and I started to not believe. And it was long, but it was retraining my brain. And I would question the what-ifs and it didn't make sense to me anymore. Or I would write it down and then I would read it back to me, myself, and I'd be like, “That's ridiculous, what I just thought.” And the other tool which was hugely helpful was breathing, learning how to breathe properly and calm myself down. I mean-- Ken: Yeah. There's lots of different types of breathing out there. And so, I teach a specific type of breathing, which is, I call it Three by Three Relaxation Breathing, which is also in the Anxiety Solution Series. And it really goes over into detail, a very simple way to breathe that you can do it anywhere. You can do it in a waiting room full of people, because it's very subtle. It's not something where you're taking a big breath and people are looking at you. It's very, very subtle. You can do it anywhere. MEDITATION FOR HEALTH ANXIETY Kimberley: Ken, just so that I understand, and also Maria, how does that help someone? For someone who has struggled with breathing or is afraid of meditation hor health anxiety and they've had a bad experience, how does the breathing specifically help, even, like you were saying, in a doctor's appointment office? Maria: I've done it actually in multiple doctor's appointments where I've had that feeling of, “I've got to get out of here now.” It's that feeling of, “Uh, no. Right now, I need to leave.” Before, before I started, I would leave. And now I realized, no, I'm not. I'm going to sit and I'm going to breathe. And no one notices. No one can see it. You can breathe and it really does calm me down, especially in the past, I've had panic attacks and feeling like I can't breathe myself. When you start to realized that you can control it and it does relax you, it really helps me a lot. I do it all the time. Kimberley: It's like a distress tolerance tool then, would you say? Maria: It's something that I can carry around with me all the time, because everyone needs to breathe. Kimberley: Yeah. I always say that your breath is free. It's a free tool. You could take it anywhere. It's perfect. Maria: Yeah. So, it's something that I can do for myself. I can rely on my breathing. And now knowing after Ken teaching me really how to do it properly, it's just invaluable. It really is, and empowering in a way. Now, when I feel like I can't be somewhere, and in fact just not so long ago, I was in a doctor's appointment, not for myself, but I sat there and it was really high up and there was lots of windows around. Of course, I don't like being [00:22:34 inaudible]. And I felt I have to get out. “Nope, I'm not going to do it. I'm not going to do it.” I sat there, I did my breathing. I actually put my earphones in and started listening to Ken's anxiety solutions and listened and took my mind off of it, and I was fine. I didn't leave. And actually, I walked away feeling empowered afterwards. So, it's huge. It's really helpful. Ken: Yeah. You just said a couple of very important things. You made a decision not to flee, so you decided right there, “I'm not going anywhere. So, I'm going to stay here. I'm going to tolerate that discomfort, but I'm going to focus on something else. I'm going to focus on my breathing. I'm going to listen to the Anxiety Solution Series.” And then by doing that, I'm assuming your anxiety either was contained, it stayed the same, or maybe it was reduced. Yeah? Maria: Yeah, it was reduced. It stayed the same. And then it started to reduce. And naturally, by the end, I was like, “I'm fine. Nothing is going to happen.” So, it was great. And the other-- I want to say actually one more thing that really, really helped me. And it was actually a turning point, was that I was in another appointment. The doctor came in and told me I was fine. And it was actually like an appointment where they had called me back medically. So, it was a different scenario. It wasn't me creating something in my head. But anyway, there was a lot of anticipation beforehand and he came in and he said, “You are fine. Go live your life.” And I walked away and I went home. And within maybe about 40 minutes, I said, “Maybe he was lying to me. Maybe he was just trying to make me feel good because he saw how anxious I was.” And at that point I realized, this is never going to stop, never. Unless I fight back, I will never-- I felt robbed of the relief that I should have felt. When he told me that, I wasn't getting that relief and I was never going to have that relief unless I used-- and at that point, I actually got angry. And I remember telling Ken, I was like, “I'm so angry because I felt robbed of the relief.” And at that point, I think I then kicked up my practicing of everything tenfold. And that was a turning point for me. Ken: Yeah. That anger really helped you. And anxiety is a very, very powerful emotion, but if you can access or manufacture a different emotion, a competing emotion, and anger is just one of them, you can often mitigate the anxiety. You can push through it. And for you, it was an invaluable resource, because it was natural. You actually felt angry. For other people, they have to manufacture it and get really tough with their anxiety. But for you, you at that moment naturally felt it. And you're right. You said it is never going to stop. And physical sensations, the body is noisy. People will have the rest of their life. You're going to have a noisy body. So, that will never stop. It's your reaction and your response to those physical sensations that is key. And you learn how to respond in a much more healthy way to whenever you got any sort of trigger external or internal. TREATMENT FOR HEALTH ANXIETY/HYPOCHONDRIA Kimberley: It's really accepting that you don't have control over anxiety. So, taking control where you have it, which is over your reactions. And I agree, I've had many clients who needed to hit rock bottom for a certain amount of time and see it play out and see that the compulsions didn't work to be like, “All right, I have to do something different. This is never going to end.” And I think that that insight too can be a real motivator for treatment of like, “I can't get the relief. It doesn't end up lasting and I deserve that like everybody else.” So, Ken, how do you see as a clinician the differences in recovery and treatment for different people? Do you feel like it's the same for everybody, or do you see that there are some differences depending on the person? Ken: Well, when I treat people with health anxiety, although the content of their specific fears might be different – some might worry more about their heart, some might worry more about shaking that they experience and worry about ALS – the treatment is basically the same, which is why I can treat them in classes or groups because it's basically the same. There are some variations. Some people are more worried about things, where other people feel more physical sensations. And I may have to tailor that a bit. So, some people have to-- their problems are more the physical sensations that they feel and they can't tolerate those physical sensations. And other people it's more mental. They're just constantly worried about things. But in general, they can be treated very similarly. It's learning how to tolerate both the uncertainty and the discomfort and the stress that they feel. Kimberley: Right. And I'll add, I think the only thing that I notice as a difference is some people have a lot of insight about their disorder and some don't. Some are really able to identify like, “Ah, this is totally Linda, my anxiety,” or whatever you want to name your anxiety. “This is my anxiety doing this.” Whereas some people I've experienced as a clinician, every single time it is cancer in their mind and they have a really hard time believing anything else. Like you said, they feel it to be true. Do you agree with that? Ken: Completely. Yeah. Some people will come to me and they know it's probably anxiety, but they're not sure. And some people, they are thoroughly convinced that they have that disease or that disorder. And even after months and months and months of-- and oftentimes the content changes. So, I have patients who, when I first start seeing them, they might be afraid of cancer. And then two months later, it's their heart. And then a couple of months later after that, it's something else. There's always something that can come up and they're always believing it's something medical. And of course, they go back to, “Well, what if this time it is? What if this time it is cancer?” And that's where they get caught in the trap. So, for them, it's answering that question. For Maria, it's the word “mostly” that she became fixated on to get lured in and take the bait. It's like, what happens to a fish that takes the bait? Now they're struggling. So, now once you take the bait, you're struggling. Kimberley: Right. And I would say, I mean, I'll personally explain. A lot of my listeners know this, but I'll share it with you guys. I have a lesion on the back of my brain that I know is there. And I have an MRI every six months. And I have a lot of clients who have a medical illness and they have health anxiety, and it's really managing, following the doctor's protocol, but not doing anything above and beyond that because it's so easy to be like, “Well, maybe I'll just schedule it a little earlier because it is there and I really should be keeping an eye on it.” And that has been an interesting process for me with the medical illness to tweak the treatment there as well. Ken: Yes, absolutely. I have a patient right now and she has a legitimate heart issue that is not dangerous. They've had many, many tests, but all of a sudden, her heart will just start racing really fast, just out of the blue. And it happens randomly and seems like stress exacerbates the frequency of it. But it's not just irritating for her, it was scary because every time she would experience it, she thought, “Maybe this is it. I'm having a heart attack.” But she really had to learn to tolerate that discomfort, that it was going to happen sometimes and that was okay. It happens and you just have to learn to live with it. Kimberley: Right. So, Maria, this is the question I'm most excited about asking you. Tell me now what a doctor's appointment looks like for you. Maria: It looks a lot better. You can actually pick up the phone and book an appointment now without avoiding it. I practice everything that I've learned. I'm not going to lie. The anticipation, maybe a couple of days before, is still there. However, it's really not as bad as it was before. I mean, before, I would be a complete mess before I even walked into the doctor's office. Now, I can walk in and I'm doing my breathing and I'm not asking multiple questions. I'm now okay with trusting what the doctor has to say. Whereas before, if I didn't like what he had to say or he didn't say exactly the way I wanted to hear it, I'd go to another doctor. But now, I'm okay with it. And it's still something I don't necessarily want to do. But leaps and bounds better. Leaps and bounds really. I can go in by myself, have a doctor's appointment, ask the regular questions and say, “Give me the answers,” and leave and be okay with it. GETTING TEST RESULTS WITH HEALTH ANXIETY Kimberley: How do you tolerate the times between the test and the test results? How do you work through that? Because sometimes it can take a week. You know what I mean? Sometimes it's a long time. Maria: Yeah. I mean, I haven't-- so, obviously, it's yearly. So, I'm at that point next year where I will have to go and have all my tests again and get the results and anticipate. But I think for me, the biggest thing is distraction and trying not to focus too much beforehand and staying calm and relaxed. And that's really it. I mean, there's always going to be anxiety there for me, I think, going to the doctors. It's not ever going to go away. I'm okay with that. But it's learning how to keep it at a point where I can understand what they're telling me and not make it into something completely different. Ken: I think you said the keywords – where you're putting your focus. So, before, your focus was on answering those what-if questions and the catastrophic possible results. And now I think your focus is on just living your life, just going about living your life and not worrying or thinking about what the catastrophic possibilities could be. Is that accurate? Would you say it's accurate? Maria: Yeah. Because if you start going down that road of what-if, you're already entering that zone, which it is just, you're never going to get the answer that you want. And it's hard because sometimes I would sit and say to myself, “I'm going to logically think this out.” And I would pretend. I mean, I even mentioned to Ken, “No, no, I'm logically thinking this out. This is what anyone would do. I'm sat there and I'm working out in my head.” And he said, “You've already engaged. You've already engaged with the anxiety.” “Have I?” And he said, “Yeah. By working it out in your head, you're engaging with the anxiety.” And that was a breakthrough as well because I thought to myself after, “I am.” I'm already wrapped up in my head logically thinking that I'm not engaging, but I'm completely engaging. So, that was an interesting turning point as well, I think. Kimberley: Amazing. You've come a long, long, long way. I'm so happy to hear that. Ken, before we wrap up, is there anything that you feel people need to know or some major points that you want to give or one key thing that they should know if they have health anxiety? Ken: Oh my gosh, there are so many. There is a tendency for people with all types of anxiety to really focus their attention on the catastrophic possibilities instead of the odds of those catastrophic possibilities happening. The odds are incredibly low. And so, if you're focusing on the fact that it's probably not likely that this is going to happen, then you'll probably go through your life and be okay if you can focus your attention on living your life. But if you focus on those catastrophic possibilities that are possible, they are, then you're going to go through life feeling very, very anxious. And if you focus on trying to prevent death, prevent suffering, then you're not really living your life. Kimberley: That's it right there. That's the phrase of the episode, I think, because I think that's the most important key part. I cannot thank you both enough for coming on. Ken: This is fun. This is great. Maria: It was fun. Kimberley: Maria, your story is so inspiring and you're so eloquent in how you shared it. I teared up twice during this episode just because I know that feeling and I just love that you've done that work. So, thank you so much for sharing. Ken: Yeah. She's really proof that someone who's suffered for 15, 20, some odd years with anxiety can get better. They just have to be really determined and really apply the strategies and be consistent. She did a great job. Kimberley: Yeah. Massive respect for you, Maria. Maria: Oh, thank you. Kimberley: Amazing. Ken, before we finish up, do you have any-- you want to share with us where people can hear from you or get access to your good stuff? Ken: Yeah. So, quietmindsolutions.com, I have a whole bunch of information on health anxiety. I have two webinars in health anxiety on that website, as well as other webinars in other specialties I have. Also, I have the Anxiety Solution Series, which is a 12-hour audio program, which focuses on all types of anxiety, including health anxiety, as well as others. And you can listen to a few chapters for free just to see if you would like it, if you could relate to it. And there's other programs, other articles, and videos that I produced. I have a coloring self-help book, which is basically a self-help for people with anxiety, but every chapter has a coloring illustration where you color. And the coloring illustration actually-- what's the word I'm looking for? It's basically a representation of what you learn in that chapter. It strengthens what you learn in that chapter. Kimberley: Cool. Ken: Yeah. And then a book called The Emetophobia Manual, which is a book for people who have fear of vomiting. Kimberley: Amazing. And we'll have all those links in the show notes for people as well. So, go to the show notes if you're interested in getting those links. Ken: Ken Goodman Therapy is the other website. It has similar information. Maria: I wanted to mention as well that I actually watched one of Ken's webinars quite by accident in the beginning before I realized I had health anxiety. And after watching it, I thought, “Oh my gosh, I've got that.” And so, it was hugely, hugely helpful because I think that having this for so many years and not realizing, there's a lot of people that still don't realize that they suffer from health anxiety. For me, as soon as I could label it as something, it was a relief because now I could find the tools and the help to work on it and get that relief. Kimberley: Amazing. Okay. Well, my heart is so full. Thank you both for coming on. It's really a pleasure to hear this story. So inspiring. So, thank you. Ken: Yeah. Thank you for doing this, Kimberley. Maria: Thank you. Ken: And thanks, Maria. ----- Thank you so much for listening. Before we finish up, we're going to do the review of the week. This is from kdeemo, and they said: “This podcast is a gift. I just found this podcast and I'm binging on the episodes. I learn something through each episode, and love her practical advice and tools. I feel like part of a community-what a gift!” Oh, I'm so, so grateful to have you kdeemo in our community. This is a beautiful, beautiful space. My hope is that it's different to every other podcast you listen to in that we give you a little bit of tools, a little bit of tips, but a huge degree of love and support and compassion and encouragement. So, thank you so much for your review. I love getting your reviews. It helps me to really double down in my mission here to give as many practical free tools as I can. It is true, it is a gift to be able to do that. So, if you could please leave a review, I would be so, so grateful. You can click wherever you're listening and leave a review there. Have a wonderful day.

The possibility of the Cowboys becoming the Yankees, the most successful franchise in MLB history, sounds great, right? Nope

I'm joined this week by Tom Hamlett of one of my favorite podcasts: DUMPSTER DIVE! Shoutout to Cix Hamlett too! Tom and I talk about… everything. Was it planned? Nope. Was it everything you could possibly want? Yup. We discuss the Real Housewives reunions, Teresa over in New Jersey, Love and Hip Hop New York (somehow…), 90 Day Fiance, The Bachelor (RIP to Clayton's season… praise God), and so much more!Tom's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thetomhamlettDumpster Dive's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dumpsterdivepodCheck out the Dumpster Dive podcast on Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/mm/podcast/dumpster-dive-a-reality-tv-deep-dive/id1533780254Check out the Dumpster Dive podcast on Apple Podcasts: https://open.spotify.com/show/0awy546ii0r4tLodsACf5K*** HEY! Some of you have asked how you can show your appreciation for all of the content provided by your mama's favorite Black geek. How about you buy me a beer/coffee? FOLLOW THE BELOW LINK: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/realitycomics2 ***CHECK OUT THE DIPP! The site that allows you to read articles about some of your favorite shows, written by experts and fans FOCUSED ON DEPTH, NOT CLICKS! Their personalized subscription site allows you to follow high-quality coverage surrounding the shows you love, and the shows you love ONLY! Check out this article for instance:https://thedipp.com/the-bachelor/rachel-bachelor-mascara?via=kendrick43Are you a Big Brother fan? Check out my other podcast called Big Brother Breakfast Club, where we've had great guests like The Cookout alliance's Hannah, Derek F. and Kyland of BB23.https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/big-brother-breakfast-club/id1581821551https://open.spotify.com/show/5hFyddPtwrtSFi5pEbdWaxDON'T FORGET TO SUBSCRIBE, RATE, AND REVIEW! I LOVE 5 STARS!EMAIL ME: realitycomicstoo@gmail.comFOLLOW ME ON INSTAGRAM: @realitycomicstoo / www.instagram.com/realitycomicstoo

On today's Locked On Yankees, Abbey and Stacey discuss the big trade that brought Josh Donaldson to the Yankees and sent Gary Sanchez and Gio Urshela to the Twins. Donaldson wasn't the only piece of the trade as the Twins also sent over shortstop Isiah Kiner-Felafa and catcher Ben Rortvedt. Sanchez being traded wasn't a shock, Urshela was. Abbey and Stacey discuss that part of the deal, the Donaldson/Cole dynamic, and more. Plus, the Yankees sign Anthony Rizzo to a two-year deal so what does that mean for Kuke Voit, and are the Yankees done making moves? Spoiler alert: Nope. They're not. Support Us By Supporting Our Sponsors! Built Bar Built Bar is a protein bar that tastes like a candy bar. Go to builtbar.com and use promo code “LOCKED15,” and you'll get 15% off your next order. BetOnline BetOnline.net has you covered this season with more props, odds and lines than ever before. BetOnline – Where The Game Starts! Rock Auto Amazing selection. Reliably low prices. All the parts your car will ever need. Visit RockAuto.com and tell them Locked On sent you. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

NOPE!!!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This week Dana decides to rant about herself and not being able to be the tiny bit of normal she used to be any longer. Trigger Warning, which shouldn't be a shock if you know us, Dana tells a puke story. Again. Jessica loves her husband- and you might say this week, she's 'hooked' on him as well. (Apologies)   A 'What the What!?' corner has the ladies asking their own investigative questions. And, this week there's a mashup corner. NOPE meets Animal Instincts Corner. Some of you may need to start preparing for some pretty huge spider friends. Think...the size of your palm. NOPE.       Raves -   Loop Holes  https://www.loopholescereal.com/ Included with every box are five pieces of menstrual care divided between pads and tampons. While a typical cycle may require more or less, this is meant to represent the typical product needs of a period.  Peptoc Hotline   Call 707-998-8410 for a little pick me up anytime. https://www.npr.org/2022/03/06/1084800784/peptoc-hotline-kindergarteners

We posted this question on IG and got a TON of interesting comments. A bit of a range in answers from “NOPE, definitely not” to “Shouldn't we focus on sacrificial love and put others before ourselves”? So we're going to address some of the nuances of the comments and some specific points to really answer this question. We admit that like a few comments, it's not just a yes or no answer. So in this episode we will cover what needs to be in place and how can needs/wants get communicated to not run into having to sacrifice but find what is best for the relationship.   Resources For Your Relationship: Sign-up for the 2-on-2 Relationship Breakthrough Session here   Watch our FREE WebClass on: The 5 Steps to Fully Repair After an Argument So You Reconnect in Minutes (Instead of Hours, Days, Weeks). Pick a time to watch it here. Order our book, The Argument Hangover, and get over $200 of free bonus gifts (like the mini course and a 90 minute training)

Intro: Boz did not invent timezones, JetBlue, Gina makes an embarrassing mistake, Boz has to run her own job interview. Let Me Run This By You: The world is coming to an end so do we still have to do yoga and stuff? Feminist Body Horror, Bros in Hollywood, Vincent Kartheiser, there's a FIGHT AT CO-WORKING!! Interview: We talk to Dave Deveau about being a child actor, Are You Afraid of the Dark, D.J. McHale, the way we stigmatize the bodies of actors (incl. child actors), York University, the Toronto drag scene, Peach Cobblah, Zee Zee Theatre Company, and Carousel Theatre For Young People.FULL TRANSCRIPT (unedited):1 (8s):And Jen Bosworth and I'm Gina . We went to theater school together. We survived it, but we didn't quite understand it. 20 years later, we're digging deep talking to our guests about their experiences and trying to make sense of it all. We survived theater school and you will too. Are we famous yet? How you doing? What's going on? Oh my God. I have a similar, I have a similar situation going, whatever that look was. Yeah, you go first. You go first. Okay girl. So, you know, I'm hustling, hustling, trying to get a job. And yesterday, so weird.1 (49s):I yesterday we finally miles and I finally figured out like, maybe I should just work at his company because there are good anyway, lovely people, whatever. So I just submit my resume and a cover letter for a job that I, that is supposedly open, write a great cover letter. Cause that's what I Excel at. I mean, anything else goes to shit, but I can really do a cover letter. So no, but so I sent it and then I get this call. Okay. So then I'm going to see in the car, our friend, Erica, our good friend, Erica. So I'm going to see her and we're going to take a walk and talk about this possible documentary. You know that you and I want to make whatever.1 (1m 30s):So I get five Ms. Calls from Miami and I'm like, what? I know no one in Miami, like Miami is like a place. I know no one. So I'm like, well, I'm not going to pick up. And finally I'm in, I'm in the drive through of the Starbucks and I make it a habit of not talking on the phone while I'm picking up my drink. So I'm like someone I'm like thinking someone's in trouble. You know? Like that's where I go. I'm like someone's in jail or my knee is whatever. So it's this woman. And she, you can tell, you know, like English is not her first language. That's fine. Like English is barely my first language anyways. So I'm talking, she's like, hi, we have an interview for you today at this company.1 (2m 11s):You know the company. And I'm like, oh, okay, well she's like, can you do it at 3:00 PM Eastern time? And I'm like 3:00 PM Eastern time to one to one that's that's noon. Right? Yeah. Noon. I, sorry. I had to do the thing. That's what you were saying. Oh no, no, no. It's noon. And I'm like any it's 1140 at the time or yeah, it's 1140 LA time. And I'm like, okay. So, so in 20 minutes she goes, no 3:00 PM. And I said, okay, just send me the invite. I'll cancel. So I canceled with Erica and then I'm waiting on the invite. And then I get the, I rushed back to put, throw some lipstick on and rush back to coworking to do the interview.1 (2m 57s):And I have like a, an invite from her that 5:00 PM LA time. Okay. So then I'm like, okay. So then I call this person and I'm like, Hey person. And then it is a comedy of mother. This is just like a tip of the iceberg of my day. Yesterday of motherfucking errors. She goes, no 3:00 PM. Your time is 5:00 PM. It became it. And then it was, it was so insane. And I'm like, listen, lady, am I supposed to jump on a call in five minutes? Do I click this in five?1 (3m 37s):Like at this point I'm shouting. I don't know what to do. And she's like, no, you're not letting me speak. I said, okay, go ahead. And she proceeds to say, I'm looking, I don't know what, she doesn't know that my husband works for the company. She goes, I'm looking at my boss's calendar and we have you. And then she starts talking about mountain time and I'm like, lady mountain time is an hour let later. And then she didn't understand. So I literally Gina, Gina, this is what I said I am. So I didn't know what else to do. It was like talking to a drunk, right. Or a person out of control or a crazy like, like I said, listen, ma'am ma'am I don't, I don't invent or make time zone.1 (4m 26s):I didn't know how else to. I said they are a thing that I cannot change. And she goes, what? And they said, here's the thing, like what you're saying? Is it actually making any it's not working? And I go, I don't, I didn't invent time zones. It's a real thing. And she just was quiet. And I said, okay. And I had her boss's email and I'm the kind of bad bitch now where I'm like, I'm just going to cut out. I can't do this. So I just don't have it in me. I'm old. And I'm, I'm just, I know my shit. So I'm like, thank you so much for your help. I got to go. And then I just emailed her boss and was like, listen, your assistant. And I are like having an epic comedy of errors, like time zone, garbage fire.1 (5m 12s):What do you want me to do? And she goes, oh, she wrote back and said, no, no, it's, it's one 30 your time, two 30 mountain time. And the other person on the call is in New York. It just, this is the working remotely different times, zones, English being a problem. And also like, I think that it's so interesting. I think the assistant was trying to be assertive and like hold boundaries and thought, I didn't understand that we actually had a fundamental problem about like math. Right, right, right. So then, and then this, and then I said, okay, so I got that settled. I said, I'm going to jump on this call in an hour then.1 (5m 54s):Yes. Okay. Then I get a call from the assistant again. And like, hi, she goes, I am so sorry. And I said, you know what it is. Okay. She goes, I, I said, don't even worry about it. I just, I couldn't. I literally said like, Gina, I couldn't take it anymore. Ma'am I had, I had to, I had to do something else.2 (6m 16s):Yeah. Yeah. I had to stop. It had though, we were just like Susan powder. We had to stop the insanity. It was just getting out of control. I had a similar comedy of errors with jet blue. Okay. Which is to say, go going back about, no, not even a month. Like actually it was only two and a half weeks ago. You know, we had this plan thing where Aaron was gonna take the boys to Utah and I was taking precedent for them. And I had a feeling that he never booked the tickets, but I didn't, I didn't put that fee.2 (6m 57s):It was one of those things. I didn't put it in the front of my brain. So we're sitting around and I go, what time do you leave on Saturday? He says, oh, I gotta look at my email. So he's looking, I could see the panic is going over his face. And long story short, he, he didn't book the tickets. And so I, I said I would do it, but the jet blue website was having a problem. So I would go, I would get everything all teed up. And then when I tried to book it, it would say there was a problem. Correct. So I did that four times.1 (7m 27s):They charged you four times. So2 (7m 28s):They charged my credit card. I mean like $15,000.1 (7m 36s):Yeah, sure, sure.2 (7m 38s):And so when the first time we called the guy, I said, oh, don't worry. The charges will fall off. Okay. And some of them did, the three big ones did, did fall off. But now it's, you know, it was a few weeks later and not all of them had fallen off. So I called JetBlue. And of course, whenever you call any company, the first thing they do is say, we are so grateful. You called, please don't call us. Please email us, please go to our website. Please talk door robot. So I did, I exchange, I started here. It was nice of me. And I, I agreed to be in line on a text.2 (8m 19s):So they were going to contact me when it was time to start texting with this person. So I'm getting notified. 45 minutes later, Helena is available to text me. So Helena and I are back and forth.1 (8m 32s):Hell2 (8m 34s):Yes. And she, it quickly, she quickly realizes that this is not, this is above her pay grade and I'm going to have to speak to a supervisor. So she tells me to call 1-800-JET-BLUE. And I said, well, Helena, we have a problem here because I did call when 800 jet blue. And it told me to text you, instead of calling, she says, no, you call this number. And, and, and that's a customer service I said, but your customer service. Yeah. But I can't help you. And we're just having this weird back and forth until, until finally I get a thing on the text that says, hello, this is Helena.2 (9m 16s):How can I help you? And I said, is this, I wrote back, is this a robot or a person I could get back? I am a person. Okay. Are you the Helena who couldn't help1 (9m 30s):God?2 (9m 31s):Or are you Helen or the supervisor? No answer. Are you both named Helena? It was so crazy. Anyway. So it's like1 (9m 40s):A fucking movie, right?2 (9m 42s):Solved. It got resolved. And then yesterday I see, I go up on my credit card and I see that they've been recharged. So I called Jack Lou. I wait on hold for one hour.1 (9m 60s):Sure. Oh, I ex2 (10m 2s):Calmly explain to the lady. And she, she asked me, does it, does, does the credit card show like a ticket number? I said, it just says American airlines, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And then I went, it's American airlines, not jet blue. I'm sorry.1 (10m 26s):Oh my2 (10m 29s):And her response was like, girl, I feel you like that is just what is happening in this world.1 (10m 37s):We are.2 (10m 37s):So like, I know every generation says the world is going to end, but in our case we really have a good case for beating out every1 (10m 48s):Yeah. Like it is. I have noticed. So like then yes, she and Gina, that is like a perfect thing of why the world is going to end. It's just because we're all, we're all doing that. And then, so I get on the interview with these two people and I'm not gonna, you know, bad mouth, a perspective employer. I will say they looked so whooped in not their fault. I'm not saying ugly. I'm not, but like they have been through it, like through it, sweatshirts, akimbo, like China,2 (11m 25s):You're wearing a sweatshirt habits, a Kimbo that's bad. Right.1 (11m 29s):It's a thing is a Kimbo. And the t-shirt under it's akimbo. And like, there's like half drawings of kids' stuff on the back wall. Like everything. I'm like, oh, wow, wow. I'm like presented. But I got like lipstick on I look and I'm like, oh, whoa, everyone needs a lot of help right now.2 (11m 49s):Yes.1 (11m 49s):Like a lot of help.2 (11m 52s):So how'd the interview go?1 (11m 53s):I a blast. I was like, okay, here's what you get when you get me, these are all my experiences. If there's a way to make it fit in your organization. Great. If not, maybe not like I that's how I said that.2 (12m 9s):I love that that's so wise.1 (12m 12s):'cause I, I have so much different shit in my background. And also I'm open to things. And also at the core of who I am is I want to work with people who are kind, but also efficient who are, have their shit together, but also are compassionate. And the kind of work is actually less important than that. And the pay rate.2 (12m 37s):Well, that's all true. But what I, what I feel so impressed by is that inherent in that was a decision not to do what you've probably always done in the past and what I certainly have exclusively done, which is, let me see what the need is. And then let me just contort myself to be, to meet their need, which never works like at like, no matter how many times it didn't work, I stood. That's still the approach that I took.1 (13m 2s):That's our manifesto link. That's the whole thing. And our manifesto it's like trying to fit into something. But here's the other thing, like literally when they started talking about the actual job, it was so vague. I, I, I don't, I didn't know what was going on. They were using terminology and like, part of it is that I don't know that world like comms, a lot of comms talk communication,2 (13m 27s):Vacations. Okay. What will you say the name of the company, but what does, what do they do?1 (13m 33s):It's like a tech company that like, but they're all over the world. It was started as a startup and just went public. They have a lot of good people, but like, I don't know their lingo. Right. So even if I knew the lingo, it was as if, I don't know. I dunno. I was just like, okay, so you, your description of actually what I'm doing on this call is so vague that I actually have to take over,2 (13m 57s):Oh, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute. Communications was being thrown around a little1 (14m 3s):Calm,2 (14m 4s):This entire story. So far is just rife with terrible communication with this time zone thing and what they're communicating to you by wearing the Kimbo sweatshirts and that they can't communicate to you about what, what the job is or what they're1 (14m 19s):Doing and understand what Insane. And so, and also I think they do, they have a tremendous amount of clients and partners in the Ukraine, so that they're like, and they're doing really a lot of work to try to keep their workers safe. Obviously. I mean, it's not altruistic I'm they need worker, you know what I mean? But, but they're also really helping, but they just literally had looked like they'd been through a war. I was like, w2 (14m 45s):W1 (14m 45s):Wow. So basically I was like, okay, well, I need to take over this interview if there's going to be any kind of, any kind of anything. I mean, and so I just pitched myself. I mean, that's what I do all day, every day in Hollywood. So like, I it's a good at it. And it also doesn't fucking scare me. Like I, what is scary to me is auditioning. Sure. Callbacks. Yeah. Being on set horrified, but like talking to people in a meeting, what have I got to lose? I've done it 4,720 times. And also tangible things have not come out of it, but it doesn't. So it's not as though I've had a bad experience.1 (15m 27s):It's just like, I've had the experiences where like, I haven't seen the flowers yet of the seeds I've planted, so I'm not traumatized by it. I'm just sorta like, whatever. It's like, I'm at coworking anyway. So I can do this. I could do a general with you guys, you know, with you too. I will. Did they seem to feel reassured by quality to take over the okay. That's good. Yeah. And I, I didn't like say like, okay, I wasn't like, I didn't go whole hog, like crazy. Like, what's wrong with you? People, I guess I have to run this interview. It's more like, okay, well, I'm going to just do silence. Right. A lot of sense. And they looked at each other, like I, one just grabbed the other, I think, to come on the call, nobody knew it was happening.1 (16m 12s):It was when I said to the assistant, Hey, can we do this Friday afternoon too? No, they really want you on today. Today. It has to be. And I was like, really? Are you sure you're talking to the right person? They don't know what do they need me on today for? I don't know what's happening. So it was just an interesting, it's an interesting time, Gina. It's like a crazy fucking time. Let me run this by you. I'm really struggling with his life.1 (16m 53s):The world is ending. Do I really need to keep refreshing our download numbers on my web browser? Do I really need to like start doing yoga? I just feel like the world, but then there's this thing like you're describing it's humanity. That's the thing that always comes through in the end. I have to say, life finds a fucking way. Life runs away as garbage as people are, particularly men. I'm sorry to say, but it's true. Like men ruin everything as garbage as people are. There's also, and I guess as landscaping being a great example of a good exception, a good man, there's always people there who are ready to turn it around and do the right thing and make the better choices and, you know, Medicaid people who are out of control and their decision making.1 (17m 40s):We have to take comfort in that. Yeah. I mean, I, there is comfort. I think that it is. Yeah. And it reminds me of like this sort of Adam McKay stuff of like, I mean, I haven't seen all of don't look up, but like, you know, I think through art, there's gotta be a way to, to like help in some way. Like I was just, I I'm thinking about like, yeah. Humor, humor, helping. The other thing that I have stumbled upon is I think, okay. So I wrote, I have a friend, a guy friend from Chicago, who's a director and he moved to LA and he's hilarious.1 (18m 23s):And he's like me married to someone, not in the business. He's like a normal guy. Right. And so he's, he's like, he wants to direct horror. He's a commercial director, but he wants to do horror. And he's like, do you have a horror film? I'm like, well, no, I don't have a show. He wants to strike to horror short. But then I wrote this piece called the weight of breath about my body. Right. And, and he's like, oh, this is body horror. And I was like, what? It is a whole new genre, feminist fucking body horror where it's a genre. And I was like, oh my God, I'm obsessed. So it is like,2 (18m 57s):That's very much was in your piece that you wrote, explain it to me more than,1 (19m 1s):Okay. So I didn't know it existed. So this, it all kind of coincided. So I talked to this guy, Justin, who I adore and I said, and I said, well, I could send you the only short, short I have. That's written that I wrote for a submission and didn't get anywhere. Sure. I'll send it to you. Whatever. It's about a woman who is covered in Spanx, can't breathe, get broken up with grabs a huge pair of scissors and starts hacking away at her at her Spanx. And then you think she might kill him. And then he leaves, okay. By a fat lady that, that like has a breakup kind of anyway, he's like, oh, you're like one step away from her. And that she just needs to, it's the way we'll shoot it. And she'll hurt herself a little bit while she's, you'll see blood.1 (19m 44s):And also the Spanx metal we'll dig into her body and you'll see like a puncture. So that is body horror. And I was like, oh, I'm all in. And the, and the impetus for that short was I was on set. I don't know if I ever talked about this. I was on set. I was cast in something as a nurse. And I had S and the, and the costumer said, you're going to wear Spanx right in under my2 (20m 12s):Scrubs. Yeah.1 (20m 13s):I was like, okay. So I bought this special pair of Spanx that I did not try on before I got to set that had metal, ribbing, metal, ribbing too small, but now I'm in them and I'm on set and I'm already petrified because I'm petrified and they start cutting. It broke loose of its binding. And the metal started cutting into my stomach and you2 (20m 36s):Couldn't sit1 (20m 37s):Down and I couldn't sit down. And I couldn't, I couldn't tell anybody because I was so embarrassed. And I told this to Justin and I couldn't and I got home and I had a huge gash that was infected in my stomach, my area of most self hatred, my belly, my gut. And it was bloody and it was bruised. And I thought, oh my God. So that's body horror. Right? And like, the way you tell that story is feminist body horror. And I'm like, oh my God. And I think Gina, it's going to be, well, what I'm wondering is, is it the only way that women get to express themselves in Hollywood is by making like body horror.2 (21m 17s):First of all, having a body is a horror, correct? I mean, do you know that that's a great premise for a whole pardon? The pun, big body of work? Because I think about that with relate, with respect to being fat. But I also think about it with respect to being old aging, Aging is such and, and being fat. And aging is like such a horrible combo because young and fat is a different thing than old and fat. Right. Older fat is just like, that has this positive connotation.1 (21m 57s):Also you could, there's underlying is that you could always lose it. You're young enough to lose it. There's2 (22m 2s):Still time. Right.1 (22m 4s):And it's not like it's not body positive, fat, positive movements are like taking hold, but old and fat. No,2 (22m 11s):It's all. Yeah. Yeah. I always often wonder do the body, body positive folks know that the biggest thing they have on their side right now is that they're young and fat as opposed to anyway. So to answer your question. Yeah. I'm sure that is the only way. And I mean, our only way in as women to anything that has been traditionally closed off to us is violent. Right? I mean, that's the only way we ever get into anything. And we always have a lot of casualties in the fronts of these feminist wars, you know, the sexual revolution. I mean, not that it didn't happen always, but you know, more spotlight on the free love movement meant that women were the casualties of a lot of sexual abuse and rape pregnancy traumas, all this kind of stuff.2 (23m 1s):Yeah. So, but you know, like you did in your beautiful blog, posts people, if you haven't read it, please go to our website and read Jen's posts. Luckily for us, we're really, we're really familiar with this horror. We're really familiar with this pain. And if we can turn it into art, then, then I hesitant, I hesitate to say will have been worth it, but at least we can do something.1 (23m 30s):Well, I'm going to turn it. Yeah. I want to turn it into money too. That's where it makes people pay. I mean, that's the pocketbooks way, which is why, like I'm getting a job outside of this industry first to be like, okay, I'm studying that, did it. And how they did it. One their bros. And they'd probably, it's all nepotism. But also if that's not the case, they started an advertising, nothing to do with Hollywood, but Hollywood, but not Hollywood per se. And they, they made money that way and then sunk it into their own projects. And then they were able to, and they made contacts in the advertising industry.1 (24m 12s):That's how so many bros have done it in Hollywood. So many bros2 (24m 15s):That, that the Genesis of that is so beautifully displayed in mad men. You see the character, I forget the name of the character that Vincent CHRO Heizer with Where he, you know, he, he, I just remember he gets involved in hire a campaign for the sport of Jai Alai and he starts, there's something about it's going to be on television and you just see him getting so sucked into the Glen. I, you know, it's, it's an, it's an undeniable glamorous draw for people who are not in the industry. Like, Ooh, everybody thinks it's glamorous to be on TV. And yes.2 (24m 56s):And people in advertising are like the perfect blend of, you know, cutthroat and creative. Maybe a little bit. And yeah. Anyway.1 (25m 6s):Yeah. I mean, I, I like doing yeah. That, that my blog post was completely completely w started by that. Like, because I'm one nosy too quick, three know my way around. And my memory's great. And know my way around research. I literally saw names did this, did this, did that, did this?4 (25m 41s):I don't know. I think there's a fight. What? Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Yeah. It's the, it's the, it's the1 (25m 51s):Guys, it2 (25m 51s):Seem like it's inside the building.1 (25m 53s):Oh, it's two coworkers. It's two people at co-working and there's a guy there's a movie maker on the left and a, a professor on the right. And they got into it2 (26m 4s):About Ukraine. Probably. They're probably talking about that.1 (26m 7s):And they might be, I dunno, anyway, that's what's forgive me anyway. No,2 (26m 10s):No,1 (26m 12s):Whoa. So, okay. So, but it was, I just couldn't research and put it together and I'm like, okay, who are these people? What are they doing? Oh, they did this. Oh, and look, look, look, look, look, look, of course people are like, well, someone was like, well, you know, you know, at one it's bad for business to talk shit about the industry. And I'm like, oh, okay. But there is no business. I have no business. What business do I have? I don't2 (26m 35s):Have any said that. Like, you shouldn't write1 (26m 37s):That. Like, like, like you want to be careful. And I was like, okay,2 (26m 42s):Well, it's never as if that's ever1 (26m 43s):Worked. Also. I said, lady, it was a woman too. And I said, listen, I have no work. There is no work. What am I, what do you mean? I won't get hired. I'm not getting hired. Not I, this is not no, like that doesn't even make any sense. It holds no water. Cause it's just, it's not true. And you know, I won't be hired if I'm dead because I stifled myself and then have a heart attack. You know what I mean? So anyway, that people say all kinds of stuff, but I also know that it is a bigger problem. I guess that's what I'm saying. It's not about these 2, 3, 2 dudes in an assistant at a table. And it is about the dues and the assistant at a table.1 (27m 25s):It's a much larger problem. So I I'm well aware that, that these three dudes are not the whole problem because people are like, you know, maybe they're nice. I'm like, oh my God, you're missing the fucking point.2 (27m 41s):You're missing the point. I'm1 (27m 43s):Nice too. I don't have a fucking job with an a, or a script with my name on it.2 (27m 47s):And we have all internalized patriarchy to such a degree that like, we miss it when it's gone. I, that group that I left. Oh yeah, it has gone. You know, I'm still, I'm still a member of the group, even though I'm not, you know, in any type of a leadership position because everything okay.1 (28m 2s):Yeah. Everything is okay.2 (28m 4s):Okay. The first thing that happened when the majority of us left is a bunch of men or like a few men came in to, it was an all female board and now it's, there's there's men on it, which is fine. And the, one of the first things they did was they re-instituted, do you know what Robert's rules1 (28m 26s):Is? No, what's that,2 (28m 28s):It's like a way of conducting a meeting where you have to have motions and seconds and all of, you know, it's1 (28m 34s):Is it like a business meeting in a 12 step group? Have you ever done?2 (28m 39s):And I, I dunno. Okay. Well sure. And I, and on the face of it, I understand it's, it's meant to be, it's meant to ensure that everybody gets to speak their mind and you know, and it, and it's meant to be, you know, it's meant to promote cohesion, but it just something about it. It's like, Robert's for like, that's what came in. It's just Robert's rules. It's just1 (29m 8s):Gross.2 (29m 9s):And it's, and, and, you know, and the organization is just gone. It's as it's as if our whole tenure, there was a fever dream and they all went like that was weird. And they just moved right back to where it all was1 (29m 23s):Before. Right. That's really sad. That's super sad.2 (29m 26s):It's sad. And I feel like in the same way that a group of humans will always look for a leader, a group of humans will always look for the, a man to be in charge. Right? It's it's, it's so deeply embedded in our DNA5 (29m 55s):Today on the podcast, we are talking to Canadian playwright, Dave devote a K a peach cobbler has drag queen alter ego. If you watched a television show in the, I think it was in the early nineties called, are you afraid of the dark? You probably saw Dave because he, in addition to being a playwright and a drag performer and an actor, he wasn't child star. So David's warm and funny and look just really a breath of fresh air. So please enjoy our conversation with Dave Devoe.6 (30m 40s):So2 (30m 44s):Anyway, Dave dissolves, congrats. Wait, actually, I have to phrase this differently for the first time I'm asking Dave devote. Did you survive theater school? Did you go to theater7 (30m 54s):School? Parts of me did.2 (30m 57s):But you went to theater7 (30m 58s):School? I did. Okay. Okay.2 (30m 60s):Good.7 (31m 2s):I'm like, what are you talking about?2 (31m 4s):Yeah, we have, we've had just one person who she actually, more than one person. People have different conceptions of what theater school is. And some people do a theater major and they don't know the difference between that and the conservatory. I couldn't care less, but I just didn't know for certain with you. So congratulations. You did survive theater school, but what, see what you're going to say more about you've survived parts of it?7 (31m 29s):Well, no, like I think like parts of me survived, right? Like I think, I think we, we all come out of theater school, like a slightly different assembly of parts than we come in. And I think for some people that's great. And I think for some people that's super detrimental. So we'll see where we all fall on that stuff.2 (31m 47s):Part of you was a casualty,7 (31m 52s):You know what, oddly enough, the, the actor part of me with, I think, was a casualty, like, because I sort of came to theater school from a very let's start at the beginning. I was a child actor in film and TV from a young young age. And so then sort of went to theater by starting in film and TV because theater felt, you know, like a really safe, lovely community-driven space. But, but I think what theater school gave me is like, I came into theater school thinking I'm going to be an actor. And I left knowing I would be a playwright for my life.7 (32m 35s):Yeah. So that was a good, first1 (32m 37s):Of all, back back it up Child, we've had one other child star Jonas Avery was on, but, but he went theater and then film and TV and back to theater school. So tell us you really, how, what happened there? That,7 (32m 54s):Yeah, I mean, it, it's, it's a bit bizarre. I was, you know, a sort of theatrical, precocious child and there, you know, and I was really into like, we, we go see a lot of theater growing up, but not a lot. I mean, we, but my parents don't come from the arts, but they were like, let's expose our kids to interesting things. And then I was, I must've been in like kindergarten grade one, something like that. And there was a teacher's assistant in our class who spoke to my mother saying my mom's an agent and your kid is really like vivacious. And do you think that's something he'd be interested in? My mom was like, I don't, I have no idea what you're talking about.7 (33m 38s):So anyway, we met with her and, and my mom's like, is this like, is this something you're interested in? I was1 (33m 44s):Like, sure, let's do it. Let's7 (33m 45s):See what happens. And, and so I just started doing like a lot of commercials, you know, when, like when I was a little, little one and then my mom was great as far as just really constantly checking in of like, is this fun? Like, is this a thing you'd like, because I mean, I don't think it was fun for like schlepping a kid around to endless auditions. That's not fun.1 (34m 7s):She knows2 (34m 9s):My kid. It's not fun. Wait, I have to time out one second, Dave, your, either your microphone here, it is sometimes7 (34m 17s):Just hold it. Cause1 (34m 18s):It2 (34m 18s):Hits your shirt and it makes up, sorry, please continue.7 (34m 22s):Yeah. So, so you know, okay.1 (34m 26s):So wait, wait, wait, I can, I can start us up with what you just said was super interesting when you met this person, were you thinking like, oh, this is an agent like, or were you just like, what was going on in your brain?7 (34m 39s):What I was thinking? I think it was more, you know, they're like, I think that the, the idea of like being on camera is really novel to kids because I think it's very different now. Like we live in a social media age, but like in the late eighties, early nineties, whenever that, yeah, probably like late eighties at this point, that's like, that's a cool thing. You know, we don't even have a big camcorder at home. Like this. I can be what in front of a camera, let's try that. So it was great. And, and then when we, when we moved, we had to move a lot for my dad's work. And so, but we kept moving to like bigger and bigger film, TV hubs, right?7 (35m 20s):Like, so when we settled in Montreal, I, the agent I'd had in Calgary had sort of forwarded us to an agent in, in Montreal. And, and then I started actually going out for like, like real stuff, like films, and then I booked a series and then it was, oh, we're doing this. Okay. And so1 (35m 42s):How old were you when you booked a series? Like that's, everyone's dream by the way that in LA, right. So7 (35m 47s):Yeah, I will, the first1 (35m 51s):Season, first series I7 (35m 53s):Would have. Oh God, that's a great question. I was probably like nine or 10. I might've been like, I might've been 12 by then.1 (36m 4s):And you were series regular, like7 (36m 6s):Yeah. Yeah. I mean, it's1 (36m 7s):So, but I mean, it's,7 (36m 11s):It sounds like it's way more work than it is because, so do, do you remember the Nickelodeon show? Are you afraid of the dark?1 (36m 18s):So that7 (36m 19s):Was, that was the show. So I was part of the campfire, which so yes, I'm a series regular and I appear in every episode, but it's like, there's a scene at the beginning. There's a scene at the end. We shoot the whole like season in like three weeks.1 (36m 33s):Right.7 (36m 34s):So it's not1 (36m 37s):Awesome. Yeah, because that's a show where like, yeah, you, you, the kids, and then you go into the story in the middle. Right. The actual story. That is fantastic. What was that like for you?7 (36m 49s):Th that series was, was incredible because I mean, a, I was a huge fan of that show. So I actually got cast at first. I got cast in one of the episodes, like in the story, not the campfire and had a real blast. And, and then I thought, wow, are you for the dark? This is amazing. We shot it. And then the series was done. It got canceled. And I thought, oh, okay, well, I'm glad I just snuck in there. So then two, three years later, they announced that they were going to bring the show back. And I called my agent immediately saying, if they're casting campfire, you have to get me in there.7 (37m 29s):Like, please, please, please, please, please I'll do anything. And she said, yeah, yeah, I'm trying. And they wouldn't see me. And I was, I was livid. And then I called us, like, sneak me in for callbacks. Like we know this casting director, she cast me before, like, please just get me in there to like, you know, all of my child, actor, friends, like went and had their callbacks. I had nothing. I was so angry. And I was like, can you sneak me in with like the girls? Cause like first they did the boys. Like, can anything please1 (37m 55s):Hustler, man, you're a hustler.7 (37m 58s):I love that show like so much. I don't know. And, and I mean, that is not, I'd never hustled for any other thing ever, but I was just, so it just felt like it's a sign. I, you know, it's, it's coming back and I just had this thing and I had such a great rapport with like the producers and the director and blah, blah, blah. So months go by and I'm, I, you know, I'm sad and I move on and then I get a call from my agent saying, they, you know, you're, you're coming in for a meeting. It's like a meet a meeting. Like, what does that mean? What's a meeting. We've never had a meeting.1 (38m 31s):Right. What is a meeting?7 (38m 32s):But it's at the, it's at like the casting directors office. I'm like, okay. So we go in and there's, you know, DJ like DJ and Ned that the creators, the producers. And they're like, Hey Dave, Hey guys. And they said, you know, You, you you've been really trying to like get in the room, haven't you? Like, I was like, oh God, that's this mortifying. Like I said, yeah, yeah, yeah. And they're like, and they said, you know, well, we, you know, we had to, we had to audition a bunch of people, but, but we wrote a role in the series for you.7 (39m 12s):And they were like, so what do you say? Like, like, is this, am I being punked? Like what's happening right now? So,1 (39m 21s):Oh my God. I just feel so. And I just want to say, I don't think there's any coincidence that it was in Canada where people are fucking nice.7 (39m 30s):Right? Yeah.1 (39m 32s):Anyway,7 (39m 34s):This is a1 (39m 34s):Dream7 (39m 35s):And what happened? And, and then, you know, suddenly it was, I was off to like, we started about a month later and it, it was shot in Montreal. Like the whole series was always shot in Montreal. And, and so we did the first season and I thought, well, that's exciting. And then suddenly they were like, Hey, we're flying all of you to New York. You're going to host Snick. I was like, I don't know what that is. We don't get Nickelodeon in Canada. Like, so they suddenly, we were in Manhattan, like shooting all this promo stuff and there were billboards and we were like, what is going on? And that was, so that was like, really, I mean, you know, I did a bunch of like real garbage, like movies and things, but that was like my one little sort of touchdown in like, oh, is this, what is this?7 (40m 17s):What fame is like1 (40m 18s):Stars to be a star. And I7 (40m 20s):Felt a bit uneasy about it truthfully. Like I was like, I don't know that that's I could see, I could see myself on that track and I could see what that probably would be for me. And I think I worried a bit about what that would, what that would1 (40m 38s):A lot about that. We talk a lot about that, about like, if I had gotten famous right out of theater school, I'd be dead. I mean, I would probably have done so many drugs and then been so interacts. Like I would have killed, I would have died at7 (40m 50s):Some point.2 (40m 52s):So what does that mean? I'm projecting ahead. Does that mean your eventual move into theater was a way of stepping back from the insanity of television?7 (41m 5s):I mean, I wonder like, it's interesting. Cause I shouldn't say that I sort of discovered theater. Like they were happening in tandem. I was doing community theater, you know, I do like the community musical in the small town where I lived and then I'd say, Hey guys, I've got to go away for three weeks to shoot. Are you afraid of dark? I'll be back and I'll resume my role. So,1 (41m 26s):So7 (41m 27s):I think, I dunno, I think so. So, okay. So, so the show happened and then I was, I was going to a fine arts high school in their creative writing program because originally I wanted to audition for the drama program, but I had, I was already on, are you afraid of the dark at that point? And so they were like, okay, but if you have to go shoot it, like you can't just not show up for drama classes for weeks at a time. Like that's not, that's not a thing. And so I was like, oh, that's a solid point. So, but I could do that in, in creative writing because it's like, I was a studious kid. I was like, I will get everything in on time. I will fax in every assignment from Stax facts. Yeah. Right.7 (42m 8s):So, so towards the end of high school, I knew by then through this creative writing program was really when I, because we were writing in every genre, but I kept going back to playwriting because it was like dialogue, dialogue. I get this, like I come from film and TV. Like I get this, this is how I see the world and hear the world. So I started applying for theater schools and then, and then got cast, I got offered another series.1 (42m 38s):Are you fucking the greatest fucking story I've ever heard?7 (42m 45s):And I, and I, then this is not self-deprecating. I think I'm a, I think I'm a good play. Right. But like, I've never been a good actor ever, like, but it was a time and place where there were roles for like a vivacious fat kid. I was much bigger as a kid. And I was it like, I was that kid,1 (43m 2s):Right?7 (43m 4s):Yeah. So it's like, there were a lot1 (43m 5s):Of, you had a niche and7 (43m 7s):You really1 (43m 7s):Did.7 (43m 8s):Yeah. So it was like, I knew that, you know, oh, you're shooting, there's, there's a film coming to town about a soccer team. Right. And they're going to cast a bunch of kids, that's you? There's a fat kid role. Sure enough, there I have.1 (43m 21s):Well, let's talk about that because that's really interesting to me and really, I mean, I also, I was an overweight kid and I'm plus size lady now. And I know that. So tell me about that. Was there an I was there, did you have feelings about being that kid?7 (43m 37s):It's interesting. Cause I don't, I don't know that I had them in the moment, but my God have I had them since I, years, years later, I was in a, like an emerging filmmaker program for the queer film festival in Toronto. And I made this short film called belly, which was all about like, not, you know, not just being like, like coming of age as like a chubby gay kid and like their staff attached to that. But specifically coming of age as a chubby gay kid on camera and being chronicled as such and like, and having like, and then, you know, we edited together footage of all of these things.7 (44m 17s):Like, like things that I was like, I can't even believe they asked like an eight year old kids to say that on camera. Right?1 (44m 23s):Like, like stuff about your weight and stuff7 (44m 26s):Pan to this character. Anyways, we're filming this guy ends up in hospital. And so I'm the kid in the bed next to him. And he starts like chatting like, oh, Hey, what's your name? Oh, I'm Stan. Oh, what are you doing in the hospital? Oh, I'm fat. Oh, but like, what else is wrong with you? No, nothing. I'm just fat, but my parents think there's something else wrong with me. Cause I'm so fat. And I was like,2 (44m 47s):Wow,7 (44m 50s):Like how, like how potentially lethally damaging that could be. Right.1 (44m 55s):Did you just compartmentalize it or?7 (44m 58s):Well, cause I think I was like, I'm on set with like, I mean, you know, a bunch of friends who I knew, like we'd done a bunch of films together. In fact, Ryan Gosling was in that movie with us back when he was, you know, a young kid, Burt Reynolds was in it. Like, it was just like, we're doing this fun thing, but also, huh. So2 (45m 18s):Yeah, there's, there's just no attention paid even w cause my son is also gets called in for those roles. He only gets called in for the bully. That that's the only role he ever gets called in for it. And when he gets cast, I just feel like it starts with costume fittings. It, the otherness, the separateness starts there and it's like, they're, they're calling me back. Is this really his like, I can't are these really his measurements? Yes. These are really his measurements. Okay. And then, and then inevitably it's something like we had to, we had to, it was hard to find pants, that kind of thing and saying that to him and or in front of saying it to me, but in front of him,7 (46m 2s):But isn't this like, isn't this your job? Like, isn't your job finding clothing for bodies. Yeah,1 (46m 8s):It is. And, and, and, and I, I, yeah. And as an actor, I have the same thing. So I find that if I had been so traumatized by, by the, not just the words on sets and ER, intelligent film, but also as an actor by the crew and by the especially wardrobe and makeup and hair and, and anyway, so you compartmentalize that part of it and you also, it sounds like no one was like, mean to you to your face. Like they weren't like, oh, we can't find clothes for you. Or,7 (46m 41s):I mean, I, I think they were a bit, but I, but I think I was really sheltered by like really good parents. Like, and I mean, you know, cause, cause I was in, there were the kids on set who had like, you know, that stage parent who like really is there to make sure their kid is successful and make sure that kids like that. And that was not the energy I had. Like I had, you know, like my mom is, is a refugee. Like she came to Canada as a refugee. Like she grew up in a very particular context and this is a very different context where she's like, I'm just here to make sure no one is fucking with my kid. Like, and not in like an aggressive way, but just in like, okay, let's, let's walk away from this conversation.7 (47m 23s):We don't want to do that. So I felt I was very taken care of in that sense.2 (47m 28s):So you, what, describe the bridge between doing all of that and then when it's time for college and you're looking into acting program or at the beginning, that's what you were going to do as an acting program.7 (47m 40s):Yeah. Yeah. So I applied for a bunch of programs, like determined that I was going to be that, you know, conservatory actor. And like, I, I look back at it now and it's so funny. It's like my, like I'm trying to sort of rationalize what my 17 year old brain, like how I chose, who I applied to. It's so confused. Like I I've applied for Juilliard like two or three times in my life, but like no other, like, but it's like Juilliard and then like the local college in my town.2 (48m 13s):Interesting.7 (48m 13s):Interesting. Like what's the Juilliard connection I have anyway. I probably someone told me once probably that Juilliard was the place and that really set in somehow. So I applied for a bunch of theater schools and there was one program in particular that I was curious about because they have a conservatory program and they have a playwriting stream and they also had what they, at that time called creative ensemble. So like devised theater. And I thought like that there's something in that maybe that's a thing. So, so I got accepted to that school and that, that school is a funny way.7 (48m 54s):It's called York university. It's just outside of Toronto and, and I mean, I'm sure there are many theater schools like this, but at that school, like everyone starts in first year in sort of a general, like all the theater students, you don't, you don't start your conservatory till second year. So you have your first year to do some shit and then you re audition for the streams. So I went there pretty determined that I really wanted to see the conservatory stream. And then there's something about the, like, you know, my acting and movement and voice classes in first year that I was like, I, I think the writing was like kind of on the wall there of like, I'm not great at this.1 (49m 39s):Okay. So say more. Yeah, yeah.7 (49m 41s):Yeah. Like I, because I mean, I think, you know, filming TV was such a fun thing for me that I was like, this needs to be fun. And like, I think it was like, I have to learn how to work in a very different way than I think my brain, or even like how weird and disconnected from my body. I am these years. Like more than I'm prepared to do.1 (50m 10s):Where you at with your body in that, in terms of when you started that school, like had you sent out or like, were you still in7 (50m 18s):Like, like many of us, like, you know, you thin out and then you don't and then you thin out again. Sure. Cause I know that between, between my first season of our, for the arc and my second season, I lost a ton of weight. And so when I showed up for fittings the second year, there was a bit of panic in the room of like, we don't know, like, Ooh, like you're, you're like the fat country bumpkin kid, like, Ooh. Hmm. So they, they padded. Yeah. They just like, they, they put they'd put me in like really bulky layers with like things on top. Like not like actual, like a fat suit, like right. Definitely shit like went out of their way to make me heftier because I think they were like, you know, kids at home, they don't want to be like, what's with Andy looks different.7 (51m 6s):What's going on.2 (51m 7s):Right, right. Oh my God.1 (51m 10s):Oh my God forbid, people change. God forbid.7 (51m 14s):So I think, you know, I like I came out when I was probably about 15. So I think after coming out was probably when I became hyper aware of my body because you know, body image in queer men, especially in that era, I think like we're in a very different time now when I think about like body positivity and in all kinds of communities, but less so then, so I think I probably started theater school, like probably slimmer than I'd ever been, I would think, but still feeling like that was not the case.1 (51m 58s):Interesting. So you're in these movement classes, these voice and speech classes and you're like, I don't think this is really right for me. So then what do you do?7 (52m 8s):So I, I like, I, I signed up to audition for the, for the conservatory, but I also sign up to audition for ensemble. And when I look at like the actual requirements of the audition, as I'm building my materials, I'm like, I don't want to do a fucking Shakespearian monologue, like ever. I do not to this day. Like, you know, I mean, I'm, I'm an artistic director of a company here. We have a Shakespeare component. Like1 (52m 38s):I was going to be a hard pass on the old Shakespeare for me.7 (52m 41s):Yeah. I dunno. Like it's just, I think I'm, I'm so I, so contemporary in my, in my taste of everything, you know, I, I read voraciously, but I want, I like historical fiction book. That's a bit of a slog for me. So, so I think it was like, I want, I think I started to take ownership of like, I know my creativity and I know where my strengths lie and my strengths lie in creating things. And I just, I think having come from like my creative writing intensive, like high school program, I was like, I don't know if I can spend every minute of the day interpreting rather than, than creating, or at least like, I'm now sort of imbuing that with like some kind of like, I have no idea if this is actually true, that, that I had this aha moment.7 (53m 44s):Or if I just panicked, I was like, I don't want to learn Shakespeare. I'm going to do this thing2 (53m 49s):Some for some reason. And maybe it's because I know that you went on to become a drag performer, something for some reason, I have this idea that maybe what was off putting to you is this idea that you were always going to be in that context, just embodying the words that, you know, I was actually just saying this to somebody the other day, actors have a unique kind of prison as artists in the sense that if they don't go on to direct and write, which almost everybody is doing these days, but if they don't, they're, they're, they're limited to only ever expressing the words of another person.2 (54m 32s):And it actually makes them in many cases we've learned even from doing these interviews, not that great at talking about themselves and their way of thinking. Cause it's all just been inside and what's been outside is the words of other people. I wonder if that somehow seemed true for you even then.7 (54m 49s):That's interesting. Yeah. Yeah. I mean that, that really resonates. So I went into this, I audition for this device theater program and even just like, you know, sometimes like sometimes you just know like when, when I, when it was like, okay, this is what I have to prepare. Okay, this, this has a lot to prepare, but like, let's do it. Let's, let's go to the studio and let's just spend hours and hours and hours getting this down. And I thought like, okay, that's interesting. Like I'm really leaning into this rather than pulling away. So like, okay. So I got into that program. And1 (55m 28s):So this was a devised7 (55m 30s):Theater, so it's like third, I think 25 of us. And, and it was literally like, you know, on Monday they're like, okay, we're this week we're in groups of four, your central theme is isolation and, and you need, you know, like there'll be certain other components and you present Friday for an audience go Was, it was great. It was really, and, and I mean, and they'd give us some really specific projects and, but it was great. It was just like generative, constantly generative. And, you know, I do think, you know, if someday I end up in a TV writer's room, like it, it, it will be because of that, of just knowing that I have to make something and I have to make something, I just have to make it work in a tiny, tiny of time.7 (56m 24s):There's no, there's not room for like this deep contemplation up, but what, I don't know, it's just do it.1 (56m 31s):Oh, you're going to, that is, that is going to, if you ever did want to do TV and a TV, like I know I'm not in a writer's room, but like, from what I know, yeah. That's like extremely helpful because overthinking and second guessing in those situations is like, nobody has time, time is money and just make a choice and fucking move on versus having an hiring. So good for you. So you, so that taught you that like you just go with it.7 (57m 3s):Yeah. And I, and I do think that how I work as a playwright is still very much that, of, of like I, and sometimes to my detriment where it's like, just, I'm just going to dive in and just write and write and write and write rather than like, I'm going to sit, I'm going to actually like outline this thing and really figure out beat by beat where I'm headed, which I'm starting to do a bit more now in my practice. So, so yeah, I got into that program and then still took like voice and movement classes with, with some of the conservatory kids on top of that. And then also started in playwriting and dramaturgy classes because I just thought it would all support what I was doing.2 (57m 47s):Oh. And I'm sure it really did. I am obsessed with drag performance and I would love to know when that started for you and what the whole journey has been like.7 (57m 58s):Yeah. So I always, I mean, when I, when I was in theater school, I was always going out to drag shows, you know, like the, the, the gay bar was, was really like, like sacred space that, and I mean, I remember, I remember not really under Steven understanding. I remember seeing drag for the first time and thinking like, why does this happen? Like, what is this? Like, you know, like why, and also like, why is it so compelling? Because on paper, it shouldn't be right. Like, okay, so someone's going to dress up and they're going to, they're not going to sing, but they're going to lit, like, they're going to pretend they're singing to a song, but it's, but I ended up being so like when it's done well, it can be really moving.7 (58m 49s):And I remember like really, I think started starting to sort of study it of like, what is that, like, why is this, why does this resonate? And then got really into sort of researching the history of drag. And I had never, and I always said like, I have no intention of ever doing drag. I just love witnessing it. I find it actually quite like that shared energy, I find quite compelling and it sort of speaks to human level.1 (59m 17s):It sounds, you know, Jean and I are both former therapists and it, to me, it sounds therapeutic. I mean, like that's when you talk about it, like it sounds and, and, and it sounds, yeah, you said it sacred. So whenever there's sacred space, there's usually some kind of healing that goes on. Yeah.7 (59m 37s):Yeah. So then my, my husband, well then the guy was sort of dating. He was, I was living in Toronto. He was here in Vancouver and he came up to visit me and I introduced him to, you know, the world of drag and all these shows, which again, he'd never really participated in, but, but it became this, you know, we were there every week to see the same show with the same Queens and being really into it. And, and then we, and then I found out I got into grad school in Vancouver, so we both moved back to Vancouver. And when I arrived here, I thought like, wow, drag here is really, it's really different from, from Toronto drag. Like it's different in the structure of shows.7 (1h 0m 19s):It's everything about it. Like in Toronto, you know, a drag queen comes out and in one costume will, you know, do like eight numbers and talk to the audience in between. And then she rotates up in the next one comes in and then you sort of rinse and repeat. So it's just like, it's endless and like lots of1 (1h 0m 34s):Show kind of a thing.7 (1h 0m 35s):Yeah. But it's Vancouver, it's like a drag queen comes out. She does one number and address. She disappears and then the next one comes out. It's just like one number, no talking. I thought like, oh, this is odd. It's hard. It's hard for me to sort of penetrate it because there, you're not developing that rapport with an audience. So, so we were sort of watching a show one night, having just seen all these magical shows in Toronto and saw the show that was just not particularly moving. And I remember leaning into my husband saying, you could do way better than this and not wanting to be those naysayers who just shit all over everyone else's efforts without actually doing anything. We said, yeah, actually like, let's do that.7 (1h 1m 19s):And so my husband had started a theater company here in Vancouver and I come from a bit of a fundraising background and, you know, they had no grant, they had no money to, to, to do the first show. So I said, you know, let me run some events. I used to run some events in Toronto and let's have you as the drag queen star. And then for years and years, I mean, our, our events took off and, and you know, at first we're doing them quarterly and then monthly and then weekly. And, and we really were living like the like casual fall kind of life. Like I was the producer who carried the bags and, and he was the star. And then as he's a, he's a theater director.7 (1h 1m 59s):So as he then had to go direct a show, I was like the, the understudy. And I started hosting his show just on sort of on a whim. I was like, I'll do this once because I really want to make some tip money because I've been producing the show for free for years. And it'd be great to just be able to pay my liquors Hab. And I did it, and it was really magical. And, and it was like, and also kind of emotional because I was like, oh, Hey child, actor, Dave, who did this thing for years and years, and then stopped how you doing there you are.7 (1h 2m 39s):Hmm. Interesting. And so it's stock and I've been doing it regularly for a decade and had a weekly show. And yeah,2 (1h 2m 51s):I was expecting you to say so that you then started in Vancouver, the kind of drag that you really related to more in Toronto. Is that, is that how it worked out?7 (1h 3m 2s):Yeah, we just sort of, yeah. Yeah. I think, and I mean, we, you know, we still do a lot of shows. Like we do guest spots on other people's shows that still have that sort of Vancouver structure. But yeah, I started, I started a show here called shame spiral, which was literally, I show up in and outfit. I do have a guest in the show and, you know, she prepares some numbers, but I don't know what I'm performing on any given night. So I have, what's called the blender of shame, which is an actual blender with the blades removed full of a hundred different songs on pieces of paper. And so when it's time for me to do, like, I talked to the audience relentlessly, when it's time to do a number on audience member comes up, picks a number, it brings it directly to the DJ.7 (1h 3m 44s):And then the whole gimmick is like, will she even, will she know this? Will she even recognize it from the opening bars? Let's see what happens. And so it's like this gag that everyone's in on2 (1h 3m 56s):And,7 (1h 3m 58s):And yeah, and, and it became, it was just so different than anything. Cause everyone was so used to like, Nope, you have to be in the exact outfit. That's in the music video to do that song. And I'm like, well, no, this week I'm going to be in this sort of like flowy number. And maybe I'm getting Shirley Bassey or maybe I'm getting Nicki Minaj or maybe I'm getting Dolly Parkin. And any of those songs are going to happen in what I'm wearing.2 (1h 4m 21s):What's it like to do Nicki Minaj number in a flowing Therese?7 (1h 4m 26s):Well, it's great. Actually, it's wild. I actually broke into the drags in here by doing Nicki Minaj. Right? Like just did wrapper drag, which is very weird to think about, but it's, you know, it's my, my husband talks, we both get interviewed about drag a lot, I think because we're like the theater professionals who are also drag Queens in the city. So we sort of straddle two worlds that are pretty associated, but a bit loosely. And he always talks about how drag is part, part, foot soldier and part court jester of like, like the, you know, the court gesture is the only person who can like make fun of the king without losing his head.7 (1h 5m 9s):And that's why Queens, like people listen to drag Queens, you know, you have Mike time and people will listen. So you really gotta make sure, you know what you have to say. And we take that very seriously. Like as a result, you know, we get hired to do political interviews with candidates running for premier here. Like,1 (1h 5m 28s):Oh,7 (1h 5m 29s):Cause it's just like, because you can, you can sort of penetrate a bit further than if Dave was interviewing someone because there's a certain grand jury and a certain shirt that's so performed, but it, it gives you, it gives you entrance. So1 (1h 5m 46s):Well, gee, do you have any idea? Cause of what goes on in my head when I hear this as like, oh, they should have a television show, like a talk show where they in drag, you know, they, that those characters interview do hard hitting interviews, but as queen, as drag, that'd be great. That'd be fantastic because also what I love, what I love about what you're saying is that the mixture of yeah. Being able to it's so worth humans are so funny. It's like if someone puts on a beautiful costume or a funny costume or a crazy costume or whatever kind of costume, and then asks you a question, there is like even a hard hitting question.1 (1h 6m 27s):There's a, what is it? It softens the blow of reality, I think. And it sort of can be make-believe, but it's not really make-believe, which is what I think is great about that is also reminds me of like Sasha Baron Cohen stuff, which is where if you put on a character, you can sort of get away with a lot of shit. And also you can pinpoint in without people taking you too seriously. And so when someone's not taking you so seriously, they're apt to actually tell you the truth more Like, what does it matter? I'm just talking, I'm just talking to these Queens. Like there's, it's so fun. It's so fun.1 (1h 7m 8s):And then all of a sudden they're dropping these serious. Now they're getting into serious stuff. And you're like, oh, like when I watched stuff like Sasha Baron Cohen, I'm Baron Cohen. I'm like, oh, oh my God, this is so intense and deep. And yet I don't really feel like I'm going to go off the deep end because it's under this guise of quote font. Right. It's like, whoa, it's real deep. It's like a real deep, it's like a real multi-layered. So I, I love this idea that you interviewed. Do you work as a team?7 (1h 7m 37s):Yeah, quite, quite a bit. Not always, but, but quite a bit. We do everything to, I mean, we, we run a company together. We raise a kid together. We do drag together. He directs the plays. Most of the plays that I write.2 (1h 7m 50s):And so you haven't been performing, but I just saw on your Instagram that it's you're reopened and you're, you've got to show up or coming up soon.7 (1h 8m 1s):Yeah. So I, so, so my husband runs a company called ZZ theater and I, which I have worked with and for, for 14 years. And so ZZ is doing its first show in its first live show. In two years, we did a full season during pandemic, which, you know, great. I'm glad we did it. And we were able to employ a lot of artists, but it's not, it's not what we're designed to do. Right. We're we're theater artists, so we're not filmmakers. So it's really exciting there that we're, it we're in rehearsal right now. But then about five months ago I started a new job. So I'm the artistic, the courts of second managing director of the children's theater here in Vancouver.7 (1h 8m 42s):And so we just opened our first show in two years yesterday and1 (1h 8m 48s):Oh, congratulations. What how'd it go? What are you doing?7 (1h 8m 51s):It went really well. I mean, yeah, it's, it's a show called Groth. It's a sort of a, an adaptation of the three Billy goats gruff. That's, that's really actually like quite beautiful and timely because it really deals with, with immigration and displacement and like who, who does or does not deserve to be in a place that has resource it's really, but, you know, but in like in a, in a whimsical digestible musical piece for kids, so that's really exciting.1 (1h 9m 29s):And then my other question is can you mix kids theater and drag?7 (1h 9m 32s):Oh, we do. Yeah. I mean, we do a lot of drag queen story time, but also the children's festival here in Vancouver commissioned our company ZZ a couple years ago to create a drag show for kids, which we perform with our son. Just the three of us.2 (1h 9m 50s):Oh, he performed.7 (1h 9m 53s):Yeah.2 (1h 9m 53s):Wow. Amazing.7 (1h 9m 55s):Yeah. The first time we did it, he was, I mean, he was like a year and a half. So he, you know, he, he was basically acute prop, you know, like he like the Simba reveal in lion king. He was the lion, right. Like genuinely in the show. And we're about to do, they sort of recommissioned the show because of course, you know, we did the show and then in 2020, we'd been booked to tour that show to every children's festival in Canada. And then clearly we all know if that didn't happen.1 (1h 10m 26s):Right.7 (1h 10m 26s):So the festival has actually recommissioned the show now because it's very different doing a show with a four year old because he like, he's like, I want my own numbers. We're like, okay. But let's figure

Nothing different about this episode. Nope just a regular ol' podcast. Timestamps: 00:00:00 A Special Announcement 00:06:29 Intro 00:09:40 Kirby & The Forgotten Land Demo 00:23:12 Triangle Strategy 00:42:19 Vampire Survivors 00:50:10 Elden Ring 01:27:39 Mario Odyssey 2 Hopes & Dreams 01:43:37 Pokémon Scarlet & Violet 02:06:09 Outro Devon: https://twitter.com/EmblemCast https://soundcloud.com/user-131072822 You can support us on Patreon - https://www.patreon.com/thisnintendolife, remember to send all your correspondence to our e-mail address: thisnintendolife@gmail.com & Join our Discord: discord.gg/mC8wjBd

Robbie Samuels is an author, speaker, and business growth strategy coach recognized as a networking expert by Harvard Business Review, Forbes, Lifehacker, and Inc. He is also a virtual event design consultant and executive Zoom producer recognized as an industry expert in the field of digital event design by JDC Events. Robbie is the author of "Croissants vs. Bagels: Strategic, Effective, and Inclusive Networking at Conferences" and "Small List, Big Results: Launch a Successful Offer No Matter the Size of Your Email List." He is a Harvard Business Review contributor. His clients include thought leaders, entrepreneurial women, associations, national, and statewide advocacy organizations, women's leadership summits, including Feeding America, California WIC Association, and AmeriCorps. Robbie is the host of the On the Schmooze podcast and #NoMoreBadZoom Virtual Happy Hours.   Most passionate about I have multiple tracks in my business. I do one-on-one coaching, group programs, all about helping people build an audience before they try to launch an offer. I also work with my virtual event clients on bringing their events online with less stress and greater participant engagement. What had been somewhat dormant, but is just starting to come back, is working with organizations around their in-person events to help them become more engaging and to really support their participants through what, for many, is their first experience at an in-person event. Robbie's career and story I spent 15 years organizing fundraising events and doing major gift work. On the side, I started speaking and showing people how to network. I was working with boards of directors and foundations. I did both of those things for about five years. Eventually, I realized that there was a possible career in doing this full-time. In 2015, I left my comfortable and safe career to really see if this thing I'd been doing for five years was going to turn into something. That's when I decided to launch a podcast, which came out a year later. I launched my first book, which today has 191 reviews on Amazon. I then got a chance to do a TEDx. Every year, I had different opportunities. I was well on my way to being an overnight success, 10 years in the making, when everything got upended in March 2020. Best advice for entrepreneurs My second book is called Small List, Big Results: Launch a Successful Offer No Matter the Size of Your Email List. That subtitle belies the fact that, a lot of times, as entrepreneurs, as experts, we get really excited about some kind of solution, some kind of offer. We get some kind of program offer—an online course app, whatever the modality is. And we rush out to market to tell people about it. The marketplace basically responds with “Who are you? What is this? Nope, I don't need this.” And we're just shocked. I think the better approach would be to not create solutions in a vacuum, but to invite input from your most likely prospects. The biggest, most critical failure with customers I mentioned this in my latest book. When my first book came out, I didn't have a very clear plan for what kind of offer would come from it. But I had a pilot in mind, and I did run a successful pilot. I got great feedback. When I went to sell the next iteration, I created a landing page and took video testimonials and written testimonials from the few people who'd gone through the initial pilot. I had 250 people view the landing page. But they did not contact me to learn more about the program. So, the problem wasn't my ability to get the word out. But in that same span of time, several people reached out to me, asking for other types of services and other types of support. That was when I really started to understand that the packaging wasn't matching. People were seeing me as a resource, but they didn't see the program as a solution. Biggest success with customers

On this episode of Got Our Attention, Charles Kimball of Bunnies4Peace Studios joins us to talk about the upcoming release of their new game, Minotaur Princess. To call this game a “match three” is incredibly misleading. It is highly story driven and your choices have future consequences. For more information (after listening to the podcast, of course) go to www.minotaurprincess.com. In Kelly's Korner Mikey's Corner, we talked about how this episode's podcast falls on National Mario Day, MAR10 (AKA: March 10th, get it?). Did we all wear Mario shirts? Nope. Did we all get together and eat Mario inspired foods? Also nope. Mike just basically rattled off some pretty nifty facts about Mario. Don't worry, next year Mike and Brian will be dressing up as Mario and Luigi so we can properly celebrate (though they may or may not know this yet)! Also: Looks like PlayStation Now is finally being replaced YouTube may be offering Podcasts a lot of money to move to video on their platform Lost Ark is in trouble for their female representations A dude gets 3 years in prison for using his COVID-19 relief money to buy a Pokémon card GOTM: Tuesday Night Trivia What We've Been Playing: Lost Ark (I'm sure no one is surprised at this point) Elden Ring (Also, I'm sure no one is surprised that Bruno beat it) Octopath Traveler Age of Darkness On a more serious note, we've started a fundraiser to help aid those in Ukraine. All proceeds go directly to Project HOPE - #HOPEforUkraine. To donate, go to https://tiltify.com/@sassgaming/help-ukraine This and more on Got Our Attention Email us at: GOA@SASSGaming.com https://www.sassgaming.com/ Also, join our Discord! https://discord.gg/pjSTZdx --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/sassgaming/message

Andy & Dan are here to discuss the latest goings on in the world of UFOs including; New James Fox documentary update Jim Semivan comments Update on legislation going through Knapp article Warzone UAP sightings and much, much more... Links: Knapp article; https://www.8newsnow.com/i-team/i-team-special-reports/i-team-former-cia-specialist-reveals-new-secrets-of-area-51-including-real-name/ NOPE trailer; https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=In8fuzj3gck UAPx Doc; www.ATearInTheSky.com Spotify listeners can now access premium content here > https://open.spotify.com/show/7wnXUAQ3vwdsX1BoyaEvjZ Sign up to support the podcast via Patreon.com/ThatUFOPodcast or Apple Podcast subscriptions (2 week free trial available) Please support our show sponsors; ** New sponsor ** One for you investors out there, get 2 months fee free investing with VinoVest! Check out our offer using this link https://zen.ai/thatufopod0 Manscaped are now offering our listeners 20% off on site plus free shipping, just head to Manscaped.com & use promocode: AndyUFO ..it's another way to support the pod :) You can also sign up to Zencastr with 40% off for 3 months with promo code: ufopodcast at https://zencastr.com/pricing?coupon=ufopodcast&fpr=7ooh0 . Start recording your own podcast or meetings today! Get in touch with the show; Twitter: @UFOUAPAM Facebook, YouTube & Instagram: "That UFO Podcast" YouTube: YouTube.com/c/ThatUFOPodcast Email: UFOUAPAM@gmail.com Linktr.ee/ufouapam Don't forget to subscribe, like and leave a review of the show. Enjoy folks! Andy

Hello Interactors,Wars, gas prices, eventual food and mineral shortages, inflation, a nagging pandemic, homelessness, immigration, migration, social and economic inequities, rising health prices, home prices, climate change, and natural disasters. What am I missing? Global society needs a hug but we’re all afraid to offer one. We need fixed, I believe, but we are fixed in what we believe.As interactors, you’re special individuals self-selected to be a part of an evolutionary journey. You’re also members of an attentive community so I welcome your participation.Please leave your comments below or email me directly.Now let’s go…TWISTED UP AND HOG TIEDAs bombs dropped across Kyiv and surrounding areas last Saturday causing destruction in their path, large missiles were also descending on portions of the state Iowa. These were trees and debris launched by a series of tornados moving at a groundspeed of 45 miles an hour generating winds upwards of 170 miles per hour. They swept across a swath of land 117 miles wide. The storm was rated at a level 4 on a five point scale. Level 4 tornados create devastating damage. Well-constructed houses are leveled; structures with weak foundations are blown some distance away; cars are thrown; large missiles are generated.This storm swept through the town where I grew up, Norwalk. None of my friends or family were impacted, but seven people died just south of Norwalk in neighboring Lucas County. Another nearby county, Madison – made famous by the book and movie The Bridges of Madison County – was also hit. The National Weather Service said, “This is second longest tornado in Iowa since 1980.”March is a little early for tornados in Iowa and July is a little late. But last July twelve swept through the state with top wind speeds of 145 miles an hour. And on July 18th of 2018 they had 21 twisters hitting 144 miles per hour.In 2020 the state was hit with a derecho – a long-lasting wide-spread blast of tornado-level winds that destroyed tens of millions of bushels of corn. Together with the stresses of the pandemic, this event pushed many farmers over the edge. It was enough to prompt Iowa State University to create a program called, “I Worry All the Time: Resources for Life in a Pandemic.” It offers steps to help people answer the question posed by the university’s outreach director, David Brown: “How do we maintain our resilience in the face of these challenges?”These natural events and human adaptation programs signal what the latest Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change (IPCC) confirms worldwide, “Globally, climate change is increasingly causing injuries, illness, malnutrition, threats to physical and mental health and well-being, and even deaths.” The panel of climate experts warn, “The extent and magnitude of climate change impacts are larger than estimated in previous assessments. They are causing severe and widespread disruption in nature and in society; reducing our ability to grow nutritious food or provide enough clean drinking water, thus affecting people's health and well-being and damaging livelihoods. In summary, the impacts of climate change are affecting billions of people in many different ways.”You would think existential threat would be a top concern. Especially among citizens of the United States given our outsized per capita-consumption of energy, goods, and resources. Nope. After President Biden’s recent State of the Union Address, Pew Research reported on a poll taken in January examining American’s views on major national issues.Seventy-one percent of those surveyed said ‘strengthening the economy’ should be the top priority for the president and Congress to address this year. Second was ‘reducing healthcare costs’ at 61 percent. ‘Dealing with climate change’ came in 14th out of 18 topics with 41 percent believing it is something government should address.Survey participants who lean both politically Left and Right believe the economy is most important. Though, Republicans believe it more than Democrats. But not my much – 82% versus 62%. A 20 point difference. But on climate change the differential is the largest of all 18 issues surveyed. Only 11% of Republicans surveyed believe the government should prioritize reducing effects of climate change versus 65% of Democrats. That’s a 54 point difference in opinion. This suggests that of all the things Americans are divided on, the one that poses the biggest threat is the one with which we differ the most.This survey targets adults age 18 living in the United States. I’ve been thinking about those youngest and oldest surveyed. I try to imagine what effects climate change will have on them in 20 years. The IPCC paints a grim picture. They created three periods of time that reflect what life will be like on planet earth given where we are today.The three periods are near-term (up to 2040), mid-term (2041-2060), and long-term (2061-2100). By 2040, the near term, a good chunk of the upper end of baby-boomers (who dominate federal government) will be dead or nearing death. Those ages 18 today will be 36 in 2040. The year 2100 seems far off, but if that 18 year old is lucky they’ll be 96 in 2100. A child born today will be 78 years old.They’ll read about those suffering Iowa farmers devastated by natural disasters, economic hardship, and a pandemic with envy. The IPCC says “children aged ten or younger in the year 2020 are projected to experience a nearly four-fold increase in extreme events under 1.5°C of global warming by 2100, and a five-fold increase under 3°C warming. Such increases in exposure would not be experienced by a person aged 55 in the year 2020 in their remaining lifetime under any warming scenario.”We are most likely too late to avoid this reality. The focus now is on adaptation. Our multi-legged, winged, and gilled friends are already trying. There is ample evidence of species climbing to higher land, shifting to cooler regions, or diving to greater depths in the ocean. This will have ripple effects throughout the ecosystem on which every living being relies – including humans. We have the mental capacity to do more than other animals than just adapt, but appear unable to do so.The IPCC says, “Adapting successfully requires an analysis of risks caused by climate change and the implementation of measures in time to reduce these risks.” They ask these five questions:Is there an awareness that climate change is causing risks?Are the current and future extent of climate risks being assessed?Have adaptation measures to reduce these risks been developed and included in planning?Are those adaptation measures being implemented?Are their implementation and effectiveness in reducing risks monitored and evaluated?On the first they claim there is increased awareness that climate change is causing these risks. Anecdotally, I see historically climate denying institutions, companies, and individuals calling for adaptation and mitigation strategies and technologies. It’s hard to say how many of them are acknowledging climate change out of fear or just seeking financial gain. Like our healthcare industry, many see opportunity in human suffering as a result of climate change.But the IPCC also says “given the rate and scope of climate change impacts, actions on assessing and communicating risks, as well as on implementing adaptation are insufficient.” These IPCC reports can’t get any more direct. They conclude, “The scientific evidence is unequivocal: climate change is a threat to human well-being and the health of the planet. Any further delay in concerted global action will miss a brief and rapidly closing window to secure a livable future.”GET ALONG LITTLE DOGGIENorwalk, Iowa is home to two movie star super-heroes, the lead in “Aquaman” Jason Momoa and Brandon Routh who played Superman in “Superman Returns”. Another famous actor was born in nearby Winterset, Iowa in Madison County – home of the covered bridges. His name is John Wayne. Or Marion Morrison, as he would have been known back in Winterset. His family moved to California when he was nine. He got the nickname ‘Duke’ when a local fireman started calling him ‘Little Duke’ after frequently seeing him walking his dog, Duke. ‘Duke’ sounded better than Marion and soon everyone was calling him by his nickname, Duke. His stage name, John Wayne, came with his first leading role in the 1930 film The Big Trail.John Wayne claims to have been a socialist while attending USC pre-law, voted for FDR in 1936 and supported Woodrow Wilson. But by 1944 he became concerned with communism and helped create the politically conservative organization Motion Picture Alliance for the Preservation of American Ideals. He and its members believed the motion picture industry, and the country, was being infiltrated by communists.But critics said the organization sympathized with fascists, was anti-Semitic, against unionization, and endorsed the Jim Crow laws of the South. It broke up in 1975, but by then John Wayne’s views were well publicized. He told Playboy magazine in 1971 that “I believe in white supremacy until the blacks are educated to a point of responsibility.” And it’s fitting he often played a cowboy because he believed America was not “wrong in taking this great country away from the Indians. Our so-called stealing of this country from them was just a matter of survival. There were great numbers of people who needed new land, and the Indians were selfishly trying to keep it for themselves.”Playing leading roles as both cowboy and war hero, John Wayne became the symbol of American exceptionalism, individualism, strength, and masculinity. When Kirk Douglas played the role of Vincent van Gogh in a 1957 film Wayne told him, “Christ, Kirk, how can you play a part like that? There's so goddamn few of us left. We got to play strong, tough characters. Not these weak queers." On welfare John Wayne said, “I'd like to know why well-educated idiots keep apologizing for lazy and complaining people who think the world owes them a living.”Ronald Reagan was a close friend of John Wayne. They were both actors, shared conservative worldviews, and had a shared vision for the American ideal that each of them personified. They remain idols of the Republican party to this very day. I’m guessing roughly one-third of the country still align to their worldview. It’s a view that holds hierarchy and authority, usually male authority, in high regard. They believe individuals control their destiny, government should not hold them back, and are skeptical of what John Wayne called ‘well-educated idiots.’This would likely include the scientists who authored that IPCC report I keep quoting. By extension, they are largely skeptical of the risks of climate change. And they see attempts by the UN, EU, or any governmental agency to enact mitigation measures as impeding individual, industry, and economic progress.But those who favor a more egalitarian and communitarian worldview see many of these strict social hierarchies and entrenched capitalistic traditions as the sources of social, economic, and environmental inequities and destruction. They seek restrictions on individual gluttony, corporate excesses, and industry exploitation.This group, often characterized as ‘The Left’, tend to believe that if they could just ‘educate’ the public, especially their counterparts, ‘The Right’, they’d come to realize the threat that we face. They’re convinced education is the answer. Clearly this isn’t working.  In 2012 a group of scientists decided to test this education theory. What they found is that not only is the theory wrong, but that“Members of the public with the highest degrees of science literacy and technical reasoning capacity were not the most concerned about climate change. Rather, they were the ones among whom cultural polarization was greatest.” We believe what we want to believe based largely on which crowd we want to be affiliated with and experts are not immune. And ordinary people on both ‘The Left’ and ‘The Right’ use the best available science to justify their beliefs. And the more knowledge we accumulate the more entrenched we become.This study confirms what others have shown which is we are polarized in our beliefs about climate change. But it also reveals that those who claim to be politically ‘moderate’ or ‘centrist’ don’t necessarily share worldviews despite be co-located on the political spectrum. Those who ‘lean Republican’ or are ‘slightly conservative’ and those who are ‘Independent’, ‘lean Democrat’, or are ‘slightly liberal’ showed their respective opinions on climate risk were exceedingly different than those claiming to be decidedly ‘conservative Republicans’ and ‘liberal Democrats.’In other words, their study suggests polarization isn’t just about Republicans and Democrats, Liberals and Conservatives, or the Far Right and Far Left, it’s about our individual worldviews and the communities we pick. And, importantly, what opinions members of those communities deem acceptable to believe and communicate. The risk of be ostracized by your in-group is so great that we resist admitting we may agree with some of what the out-group believes – even if deep down we believe it to be truthful.Here’s an extreme example inspired by the study. Imagine a diehard Republican Iowa farmer, Scott, who lost a family member in one of those tornados. Perhaps he heard of a farmer friend of a friend who had crops damaged by those storms in 2020 and became bankrupt. Scott may have become so troubled and anxious that he even attended one of those therapy sessions Iowa State University holds.Somehow these unfortunate life events eventually convinced him climate change is real, but he largely keeps his opinion to himself for fear of not fitting in. Then one day he gets invited to go on a hunting trip in North Dakota by an old high school friend who works on a fracking rig. There he is surrounded by his buddy’s work pals, oil guys, talking s**t about liberals who get riled up over climate change. How likely is Scott to admit to these guys that he believes in climate change? It makes no difference that he’s a Republican or they are, he knows it’s his clan and he knows the social cost of speaking his mind. He knows climate denial is part of what keeps him in the club.On the other side, the environmental science community and some activists, across the mostly liberal spectrum, are splintering over mixed worldviews on energy policy. Many environmental scientists weigh the risk of human lives due to climate change against accidents from nuclear energy reactors and are coming out in support of nuclear energy. They get skewered on Twitter for advocating in favor of nuclear power even though they’re doing it in the name of saving lives and the planet. The “No Nukes” movement of the 70s is so strong to this day among the environmentalist crew that anybody who dares to say “Yes to Nukes” is shamed, blamed, and defamed.It turns out that when we feel bounded in our rationality, we are really good at seeking knowledge to unbind it. Psychologists and sociologists called it ‘motivated cognition’. Our memory does it on our behalf. For example, we tend to remember our successes more than failures. And if a recollection of an event doesn’t match our current worldview, we’ll unknowingly reshape the memory to suit our current motives. We also tend to preference and ingest new and novel information when it suits our immediate interest and desires. We tend to want to believe a study even when we know the sample size is too small or is poorly designed. This makes bite sized social media fed by our social feeds perfect appetizers for the full meal deal found in a longer article, news report, podcast, or talk show.But this study – that my own motivated cognition led me to – points to an even more weighty form of cognition: ‘cultural cognition’. This theory is frequently used to better understand how we evaluate risk. It states that our personal values are what lead us to seek facts so we may conduct our own risk analysis. And we are more likely to believe what our in-group wants us to believe than what may actually be true.LOVE ‘EM UPWe live in a diverse society of conflicting opinions. For us to minimize the effects of climate change, to make kids born today not suffer more than they have to, we’re going to have to come together now. Yesterday. So what do we do? Sadly, there are more studies identifying these behaviors and theories explaining them then there are confirming solutions. But the authors of the study offer a clue. It has to do with minimizing the self-threat people feel when confronted with information they disagree with…or more specifically, with opinions and knowledge they deem representative of the out-group.When we are presented information that affirms our beliefs, we use that as evidence to bolster our position in our in-group. This is referred to as self-affirmation bias. It’s what keeps us polarized in our camps. It makes us feel good and raises our self-esteem. But there are many things that can raise our self-esteem that aren’t related to our consumption of self-affirming sound bites.When we’re presented with information that feeds our self-affirmation bias we have a choice to make. We can gobble it up as another self-esteem boost or we can interrogate, question, and evaluate it. We have agency to choose whether this is true or not or even worthy of consideration. And studies have shown that the best way to get ourselves in this frame of mind is to find another way to boost our self-esteem before consuming the information. Just by writing down one thing that we value about ourselves or others value in us is all it takes. That self-esteem boost is sufficient enough that we loose the craving for that self-affirming nugget of information being fed to us from members of our tribe.For example, in one study they found “a capital punishment proponent should feel more open to evidence challenging the death penalty’s effectiveness if he or she feels affirmed as a good friend or valued employee. Self-affirmations, [they] argue, trivialize the attitude as a source of self-worth and thus make it easier to give up.”This reminds me of the Seattle Seahawks head coach approach to coaching. Pete Carroll is known for signing players who excelled at one position in college or professionally and then convincing, converting, and committing them to become equally proficient, or more, in a different position. They are invariably resistant. After all, they have their ego, identity, and paycheck wrapped up in their history as a certain kind of player in a particular position. They’ve even created their own in-group fan club they don’t want to disappoint.Carroll’s solution is very easy and unorthodox for a football coach. Instead of focusing on what new skills they need to learn, an anxiety he knows they already possess, he reminds them of what they’re good at. He builds up their self-esteem by focusing on them as humans or on their athletic skills unrelated to the position. As Pete says, “I love ‘em up.”He finds that within a short time they are the ones that come to him saying, “Coach, I think I’m ready to try that position.” He barely has to mention it. By boosting their self-esteem Coach Carroll puts them in a frame of mind whereby they no longer need to rely on their ego boosting, self-affirming biased past to feel good about themselves. And, by in large, they’re better for it.This demonstrates that we need not wait for others to find alternative ways to build self-esteem. When confronted with people who you find resistant to your position on issues to do with the environment, economy, or equity try offering them a compliment. Maybe ask them what makes them feel good in the world. Ask them what they like doing, what they’re good at. Maybe even ask them what they fear.You’ll be triggering pangs of self-esteem in them. You’ll be reminding them of how special they are. And let’s face it, we’re all special and we’re all afraid of something. My experience is that when I do, I may not win them over right there and then – or ever – but I just might find what we have in common. You may find, as I have, that just by this act you’ve boosted your own self-esteem such that you may be open to their opinions.I wonder what would happen if our friend Scott, the right-wing farmer in Iowa, reminded a couple of those North Dakota frackers what makes them special. Maybe it’s a hidden talent, hobby, or award they earned at work. And I wonder if in doing so he would have found an opening to ask them about what they really felt about fracking, fossil fuel, and the impact it was having on the land they were walking on and the animals they were hunting. For all we know, they’re all afraid of the effects of climate change but fear the backlash from their peers more than the world ending.The latest IPCC report emphasizes the complexities surrounding the interaction of people and place and the role these interdependent interactions play in the cause and effects of climate change. They write, “This report has a strong focus on the interactions among the coupled systems climate, ecosystems (including their biodiversity) and human society. These interactions are the basis of emerging risks from climate change, ecosystem degradation and biodiversity loss and, at the same time, offer opportunities for the future.”They go on to state that “Human society causes climate change…impacts ecosystems and can restore and conserve them.” [my emphasis] They also remind us that “Meeting the objectives of climate resilient development thereby supporting human, ecosystem and planetary health, as well as human well-being, requires society and ecosystems to move over (transition) to a more resilient state.”A sizable chunk of disadvantaged members of our global community have been forced into a perpetual and exhausting resilient state for centuries. All at the hands of generations of a relatively small advantaged few. The outreach director at Iowa State asked weary farmers, “How do we maintain our resilience in the face of these challenges?”Our increased polarization is taxing the resiliency of our respective out-groups. It’s time we restore and conserve them, embrace the diversity of opinion, recognize all worldviews are coupled systems that make up the messy but necessary human condition. Yes we have a climate crisis, but we also have an empathy crisis. Planetary health starts with mental well-being. Let’s boost our own self-esteem, the esteemed members of our clan, and even those you can’t stand. Those born today will appreciate it when they’re your age. Subscribe at interplace.io

 Yes, there could be an invasion of GIANT FLYING SPIDERS! NOPE! See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Adapted by Julie Hoverson from a story by Phillips Barbee (pseudonym of Robert Sheckley) Published in Galaxy Science Fiction, December 1952   Classic era science fiction about a very odd visitor from outer space.   Cast List Professor Michaels - Grant Baciocco (Radio Adventures of Dr. Floyd) Frank Connors - Bryan Hendrickson Mrs. Jones - Kimberly Poole (Warp'd Space) Sheriff Flynn - Glen Hallstrom General O'Donnell - Chuck Burke Allenson, scientist - Cary Ayers Moriarty, physicist - Eleiece Krawiec Brigadier-General - H. Keith Lyons Driver - Cary Ayers Soldier1 - John Carroll Soldier2 - Lothar Tuppan Pilot - Mark Olson The Leech - Suzanne Dunn, Will Watt, James Sedgwick, Julie Hoverson Many thanks to Project Gutenberg and Librivox for curating these classic stories. [Link to The Leech in short sci fi collection 24 at Librivox] Music by  misterscott99 [Thanx to Steve Guy for suggesting searching YouTube for a Theramin artist!!] Editing and Sound:   Julie Hoverson Cover Design:  Brett Coulstock   "What kind of a place is it? Why it's a cabin in upstate New York, can't you tell?" ************************************************ The Leech By Phillips Barbee (Robert Sheckley), Galaxy Science Fiction December 1952 Cast: [Opening credits - Olivia] The Leech Frank Connors, assistant Professor Michaels, anthropologist Mrs. Jones, housekeeper Sheriff Flynn / Jerry General O'Donnell / driver Allenson, scientist Moriarty, atomic physicist [bring in the leech voice, subtle, under the opening credits] LEECH A LEECH    hungry.  Empty.  hungry.  Empty. hungry.  hungry.  Empty [repeats under] OLIVIA     Did you have any trouble finding it?  What do you mean, what kind of a place is it?  Why, it's a professor's rural retreat, circa 1952, can't you tell?  LEECH    falling falling falling heat impact FOOD!  ...eat. MUSIC STING   1_BIG NEWS AMBIANCE    OUTDOORS, BREEZE, CREAK OF HAMMOCK SOUND    [OFF A BIT]  KNOCK ON DOOR, SCREEN DOOR OPENS MRS. JONES    What? FRANK     Where's the prof?  I have to talk to him! MRS. JONES    You can give me his mail, young man. FRANK    But this is big news! MRS. JONES    If it's school business-- FRANK    It's not! MRS. JONES    It can still wait.  This is Professor Michaels' resting week, and you know it.  SOUND    SCREEN DOOR SLAMS MRS. JONES    [fading out] Bad enough those army convoys have to drive by at all hours of the day and night. FRANK    Wait!  Oh, heck. SOUND    A COUPLE OF STEPS ON WOOD PROF    [sigh] [calling]  Conners?  What the devil are you on about? SOUND    FOOTSTEPS ON GRAVEL FRANK     Oh!  Professor!  Say - I'm awfully sorry to disturb you, but there's something damn funny out in the ditch. PROF    Ditch? SOUND    DOOR OPENS MRS. JONES    Oh, you!  I told him to go, professor! PROF    It's all right, Mrs. Jones.  I'll handle this. MRS. JONES    Dinner in half an hour!  You know how you get when you don't eat. SOUND    DOOR SHUTS FRANK     So, the ditch.  Didja hear me?  There's something weird. PROF    Of course I heard you.  [sigh]  You found a pixie.  Feed him some milk, and go away. FRANK     No sir, I think it's a... a rock. PROF    A rock.  In the road.  How quaint.  FRANK    But sir-- PROF    [annoyed, but languid]  What is your job, Frank? FRANK    Sir? PROF    If you don't know, then perhaps I should hire someone else. FRANK    I'm to keep everyone off you while you relax.  See to the mail, the shopping. PROF    And does any of that involve spotting "rocks"? FRANK    No. PROF    Warning me of rocks? FRANK    No. PROF    Protecting me from rocks? FRANK    No, but-- PROF    So move the rock and get on with your-- FRANK    But sir, I tried!  See? SOUND    SHOVEL MOVEMENT PROF    [sigh] what?  [sharper] What? SOUND    DOOR SLAMS OPEN MRS. JONES    What on god's green earth did you do to my shovel, young man? FRANK    I didn't do anything.  The rock thing did! MUSIC   LEECH B SOUND    [UNDER] FEET ON GRAVEL LEECH    food dull food warm light FOOD cold dark food slow food sloooooow... MUSIC   2_THE LEECH AMBIANCE    OUTDOORS SOUND    WALKING QUICKLY FRANK    [a bit breathless] I really wouldn't have bothered you for just nothing, but look! SOUND    DOINK ON METAL FRANK    Two inches!  It melted two inches right off! SOUND    FEET HALT PROF    [incredulous] That?  FRANK    That!  You can see it better from up close. PROF    Shh!  SOUND    SLOWER FOOTSTEPS PROF    [whispered] Do you hear anything? FRANK    [whispered] No.  I mean, not beyond birds and things. PROF    [grim] Neither do I. FRANK    So? PROF    [brighter]  Well, it's indicative of something, isn't it? SOUND    BRISKER FOOTSTEPS PROF    You have a notebook on you?  FRANK    No. PROF    Anything to write on? FRANK    Uh, no.  Just - just your mail. PROF    Here.  SOUND    SHUFFLE ENVELOPES PROF    No... no... no... Ah.  Here.  They won't notice if I don't respond. SOUND    SLAPS PAPER INTO HAND FRANK    Okay. PROF    We have what appears to be a round item of a stone-like appearance.  Greyish-black and striated. SOUND    JUGGLE SHOVEL, WRITING NOISES FRANK    Gotcha. PROF    [dictating] Sitting in the ditch.  Nearest edge, say, three feet off the road. FRANK    It's a bit farther than that, isn't it? PROF    I wouldn't say so. FRANK    [acquiescing] Okay. PROF    About the size of a truck tire. FRANK    No, really now, I think you have your proportions mixed up... SOUND    WALKS FORWARD FRANK    [dismayed] Oh. PROF    What?  Think I'm getting senile or something? FRANK    No, just... PROF    "Just" is not quantifiable.  Just spit it out. FRANK    It was smaller.  Before. PROF    How much smaller? FRANK    I dunno - an inch maybe.  But definitely smaller. PROF    Find me a stick. FRANK    A... stick? PROF    Here. [give me that] SOUND    TAKES SHOVEL FRANK    Don't touch it! PROF    I'm not planning to.  Not yet. SOUND    A COUPLE OF STEPS, DRAGGING SOUND PROF    As you observe, I am drawing a line approximately three inches beyond the edge of the thing. FRANK    [noting] Three inches.  Got it. PROF    Now, we'll have something to measure by in case it grows again. FRANK    Right. PROF    Now.  Let's see what happens. SOUND    METAL ON STONE - SORT OF SOUND    SIZZLING NOISE PROF    It's not unyielding - the shovel seems to sink in-- FRANK    Oh no it's not! SOUND    SCRAPE PROF    What?  Aha!  You're right.  It's not sinking in, it's being melted away.  Gives the same impression.  Odd how the mind interprets things.... FRANK    I think it just got bigger. PROF    Really? FRANK    I was watching, and I think it swelled a little. PROF    Could be heat waves.  I suspect something like this would reflect like asphalt.  But let's test it.  The shovel's not good for much any more anyway. SOUND    METAL ON STONE GRATE, SIZZLING FRANK    Don't touch it! PROF    My hand is nowhere near touching it.  I merely want to see... FRANK    Look!  It's getting larger!  I can see it! SOUND    WOOD ON STONE PROF    [impressed] Well!  [clinical] But it generates no appreciable heat.  Odd.  I would assume some sort of acidic chemical reaction, which would almost invariably generate heat.  FRANK    And it grew!  Just a fraction of an inch-- PROF    I was paying attention to other things.  [sigh] SOUND    WOOD LANDS ON STONE, SIZZLING FRANK    D'you see it swelling? PROF    I doubt there was enough left of that handle to do much.  What else--? FRANK    Rocks? PROF    Sound thinking. SOUND    PICK UP SOME ROCKS, DROP THEM, SIZZLE FRANK    Isn't that just about the damnedest thing you ever saw, Professor?  What do you think it is? PROF    It's no stone...  I'm going to phone the college and ask a physics man about it.  Or a biologist. I'd like to get rid of that thing before it spoils my lawn. MUSIC   LEECH C LEECH    food sharp food fall food lie food move moist food dry food grow food air grow bigger grow.... wake! MUSIC   3_BACON AMBIANCE    IN PROF'S HOUSE SOUND    DISTANT POUNDING ON DOOR MRS. JONES    What is it?  SOUND    BUSTLING THROUGH HOUSE SOUND    DOOR YANKED OPEN MRS. JONES    You better have a brilliant explanation for this-- FRANK    Absolutely vital.  Professor Michaels knows‑‑ PROF    I'm coming.  It had better be particularly important to drag me away from Mrs. Jones' bacon. MRS. JONES    [amused annoyance] And Mrs. Jones better leave you boys to your business and see to her bacon before it all burns away. SOUND    BUSTLES OFF FRANK    It's nearly eighteen feet across! PROF    The thing? FRANK    Yup!  PROF    I was trying some acids on it yesterday, and nothing seemed to even ruffle it. FRANK    None of them? PROF    Nope.  I'll finagle a bacon sandwich or two and we'll head out presently. MUSIC   LEECH D LEECH    so small.  how is one so small.  one was large.  one was grand.  Miniscule now.  Hungry.  sooooo hungry.  food is slow. Dull.  Eat... MUSIC   4_SHERIFF AMBIANCE    OUTDOORS, AT THE SITE FRANK    See what I mean? PROF    Seems the larger it gets, the faster it grows.  Not surprising, if what I suspect is happening is true. FRANK    What's that?  PROF    Say it absorbs whatever it touches.  The more surface area, the more it can touch, the more it can absorb. FRANK    That's not good.  It's like some kind of... of leech. PROF    I don't know that I would characterize it so narrowly just yet, Frank-- SOUND    CAR DRIVES UP, STOPS FRANK    Morning Sheriff! SHERIFF    Morning.  What the devil is this? PROF    Don't know.  Just showed up. SHERIFF    Ha. Ha.  We gotta get it out of the road!  Something like this, you can't let it block the road.  The Army's gotta use this road. FRANK    We didn't-- PROF    Shh.  [up, dry] Terribly sorry.  Go right ahead and move it, Sheriff. But be careful. It's hot. FRANK    [quiet] Hot? PROF    [quiet] Close enough. SHERIFF    Should just be able to-- SOUND    OPENS TRUNK SHERIFF    Where is the--? FRANK    [quiet] Shouldn't we warn him? PROF    [quiet] We'll stop him if he goes to touch it.  But if he doesn't see for himself, he'll never buy it. FRANK    Oh. MUSIC   LEECH E SOUND    [UNDER] METAL HITTING STONE, GUNSHOTS SHERIFF    [frustrated noise] LEECH    slow food.  fast!  energy impact.  ahhhhhh.  more.   more hit.  more energy.  give! MUSIC   5_MONKEY'S UNCLE AMBIANCE    OUTDOORS, AT THE SITE SHERIFF    Well, I'll be a monkey's uncle. PROF    [quiet] That would make deputy Jerry, there, "cheetah".   FRANK    [snickers] PROF    Ready to listen yet, sheriff? SOUND    ARMY CONVOY APPROACHING SHERIFF    What?  Hey look!  NOW we'll get some action! PROF    [quiet] That's rather what I'm afraid of. MUSIC   LEECH F SOUND     [UNDER]     CONVOY STOPS, IDLES, DOORS OPEN, ETC. LEECH    more energy.  more food.  need.  senses very dim.  Thoughts very dim.  grow.  waken more.  food. MUSIC   6_ARMY AMBIANCE    OUTDOORS, AT THE SITE O'DONNELL    You can't block this road.  Clear that away. PROF    Sorry.  It's not ours.  And we can't seem to do anything with it. O'DONNELL    What in sam hill is it? FRANK    A leech. SHERIFF    A what? PROF    [annoyed but covering] Simply a name to refer to it by - we have no real idea what it is. O'DONNELL    But you've tried moving it? PROF    Every way we could think of. O'DONNELL    Crowbar? FRANK    Didn't help. O'DONNELL    Blowtorch? PROF    More or less.  No effect. O'DONNELL    Gunshot? SHERIFF    Sad to say... O'DONNELL    [calling orders] Driver?  Ride over that thing. FRANK    But sir! PROF    Shh. SOUND    JEEP STARTS INTO GEAR FRANK    [to prof] We have to stop him! PROF    You thought the sheriff was bad, having to see it first?  This is the military. FRANK    Oh. SOUND    JEEP ROLLS FORWARD SLOWLY, TAKES A BUMP, THEN HALTS, SIZZLING SNEAKS IN, UNDER. O'DONNELL    [bellowing] I didn't tell you to stop! DRIVER    I didn't stop it, sir! O'DONNELL    Get moving! DRIVER    It's stalled out sir! PROF    General?  Pardon me, but if you look closely, you'll see that the tires are melting down. SOUND    POP, HISS OF TIRE FRANK    Yikes! O'DONNELL    Criminee!  [orders] Driver!  Jump clear!  Don't touch any of that grey stuff! MUSIC   LEECH G SOUND     [UNDER] DRIVER CLIMBS ONTO HOOD OF CAR AND JUMPS LEECH    large food.  energy.  much movement.  nice.  hungry.  more large?  Need food.  waking waking... more self, more hungry.  need food MUSIC   7_JEEP AMBIANCE    OUTDOORS, AT THE SITE SOUND    CAR SLOWLY SINKING INTO THE THING, MUCH SIZZLING DRIVER    It's up to the chassis already! O'DONNELL    How fast can it eat? PROF    [quiet] you are keeping track aren't you? FRANK    Sure thing, professor!  It's been about three minutes, give or take a few. PROF    Make a note - Frank needs a stopwatch. FRANK    Oh.  Ok.  Right. SOUND    SCRIBBLING O'DONNELL    You called this thing a leech, professor? PROF    As I said, it is nothing but a name to refer to it by. O'DONNELL    But it is leeching, far as I can tell - eating anything that gets near it. PROF    Which bodes rather ill for the underside. O'DONNELL    Whazzat? PROF    You're only thinking about things that get near it on the top - who knows how far below this thing may have eaten away the dirt, or even the bedrock. FRANK    Dirt and stones do seem to digest a bit slower. O'DONNELL    You've been experimenting with it, eh?  Did you by any chance MAKE this thing with one of your experiments, professor? PROF    [sigh]  First, general, I am not that type of scientist.  I am a professor of anthropology.  I do, however, understand scientific method and felt that if we established some parameters up front, such as rate of growth, speed of dissolution, etc., we might be able to more easily convince some of my hard science colleagues to come and have a look. O'DONNELL    [after a pause] So you say. SOUND    MARCHES OFF FRANK    You did that on purpose, didn't you?  PROF    [over innocent] did what? FRANK    Oh, no - don't play innocent!  I've seen you lecture someone til their eyes glazed over, before this! PROF    [chuckle] DRIVER    [background]  There goes the aerial! SOUND    SIZZLING OUT O'DONNELL    [commands, off] You!  DRIVER    Sir!  Yes sir! O'DONNELL    [commands, off] Go back and have some men bring up hand grenades and dynamite! DRIVER    Yes sir! FRANK    That will get it! PROF    I am not so sure. O'DONNELL    [from off, yelling to prof] I don't know what you've got here, but it's not going to stop a U.S. Army convoy! PROF    I pray he's right. MUSIC   LEECH H SOUND UNDER    EXPLOSIONS - HAND GRENADES AND DYNAMITE LEECH    waking more.  thinking more.  sensing more.  hungry. [boom] food!  yes yes food! [boom]  Ahhhhh eat and grow.  [bullets] mass and movement.  energy.  more.  yes.  please!  [huge explosion]  yesssssss! MUSIC   8_EVACUATE AMBIANCE    OUTDOORS, NEAR PROF'S HOUSE SOUND    WOOD CRACKING THROUGHOUT UNDER MRS. JONES    Well, I never. PROF    Did you get everything moved out all right? MRS. JONES    Well, yes, but I've cooked for you in that very house for nearly ten years now.  Where am I supposed to feel at home?  Where are you? [supposed to feel at home] PROF    [muttered] That may not be a problem for long. SOUND    HUGE CRACK, SHATTER OF GLASS MRS. JONES    There goes the front porch!  Who would have thought such a terrible thing could spread so darn far? PROF    The government surely didn't. MRS. JONES    It looks like one of them - what's the word?  Blasted heath.  Yes.  That's exactly what a blasted heath would look like. PROF    [musing] Or a cooled lava flow.  [snapping out] Either way, it's pretty darn blasted. MRS. JONES    Blasted leech. SOUND    FEET ARRIVING PROF    I do wish people would stop calling it that. SOLDIER    Pardon me, sir?  General O'Donnell would like to see you at the command post. PROF    Right.  I already know the end to this little melodrama.  [to soldier] See to it Mrs. Jones gets back to the city, will you? SOLDIER    Sir, I'm supposed to escort you-- PROF    But I know where I'm going.  She does not. SOLDIER    Yes, sir! MUSIC   LEECH I SOUND    CRUSHING HOUSE UNDER LEECH    slow food.  want fast food.  more awake now.  why no more fast come.  good energy.  big food.  hungry.  more food make more pieces.  more pieces make more hungry.  more hungry wants more food.  MUSIC   9_PERIMETER AMBIANCE    OUTDOORS, AT THE EDGE OF THE LARGER SITE SOUND    CROWD NOISE, FADING IN PROF    What's that over there? SOLDIER2    Perimeter.  Barbed wire.  Half mile out. PROF    I doubt the barbed wire is making all that noise. SOLDIER2    Oh, them.  Reporters.  Rubberneckers. FRANK    [calling from off] Professor! PROF    Assistants. SOLDIER2    You need assistance? PROF    Just my assistant.  Let him in would you? SOLDIER2    I don't have any orders-- PROF    Well, he takes all my notes, so I guess I'll have to stay within earshot.  Which ends about here. SOLDIER2    But the general-- PROF    Will it be easier to move the general, or my assistant, do you think? SOLDIER2    Um... MUSIC   10_HQ AMBIANCE    INSIDE HEADQUARTERS TENT SOUND    TENT FLAP SWOOP, PROF AND FRANK ENTER TENT O'DONNELL    I've been put in charge of operation leech.  Ah, professor... and...? PROF    My assistant.  He is also the one who found this thing in the first place.  Absolutely indispensable. FRANK    Hi. O'DONNELL    Is he trustworthy? PROF    Think of him as my right arm. FRANK    The one he writes with. O'DONNELL    You're a professor, right? PROF    Yes. Anthropology. O'DONNELL    Good.  I'd like you to stay around in an advisory capacity.  I'd appreciate your observations on the... enemy. PROF    I think this is more in the line of a physicist or a biochemist. O'DONNELL    I don't want this place cluttered up with scientists.  FRANK    But he isn't-- O'DONNELL    Don't get me wrong. I have the greatest appreciation for science. I am, if I do say so, a scientific soldier. I'm always interested in the latest weapons. You can't fight any kind of a war any more without science. PROF    Of course not. O'DONNELL    But I can't have a team of longhairs poking around this thing for the next month, holding me up. My job is to destroy it, by any means in my power, and at once. I am going to do just that. PROF    I don't think it will be that easy. O'DONNELL    That's what you're here for.  Tell me what the problem is, and I'll figure out how to solve it. FRANK    [muttered] Usually a scientist's job. PROF    Very well.  As far as I can figure out, this thing-- O'DONNELL    The leech. PROF    It isn't really-- O'DONNELL    It's the codename. FRANK    [muttered] I'm the one who called it that in the first place. PROF    The "leech" appears to be an organic mass-energy converter, and a frighteningly efficient one.  I'm guessing here, and keep in mind that this is really not my-- O'DONNELL    Get on with it. PROF    It appears to convert external mass into energy, then back into its own internal mass.  Energy is directly converted into the body mass.  How this takes place, I do not know.  The leech is not protoplasmic.  It may not even be cellular-- O'DONNELL    So we need something big against it.  That's all right, then.  I've got plenty of big stuff here. FRANK    Oh boy! PROF    I don't think you understand me.  Let me rephrase.  [intense] The leech eats energy!  It will consume any energy weapon you use against it. O'DONNELL    [considering]  And what happens if it keeps on eating? PROF    I think it will only be limited by its food source. O'DONNELL    So when it runs out, we'll all be safe? PROF    When it runs out, we'll all be gone. MUSIC   LEECH J LEECH    senses growing.  Feel moving food.  Sitting food.  Food near.  Food far.  Waiting for food to come near.  Hungrrrrry. MUSIC   11_NEED HELP AMBIANCE    INSIDE HEADQUARTERS TENT PROF    I insist you contact some physicists.  Biologists and chemists too.  Give them a chance to figure out how to nullify it.  I can give you some names. O'DONNELL    I don't have time to wait while a passel of scientists wrangle!  I have this axiom - Muster enough force, and anything will give.  Anything. FRANK    [muttered] Military thinking. O'DONNELL    [pleased] Thanks. PROF    [sigh] But I am not that kind of-- O'DONNELL    Don't sell yourself short, Prof!  And don't underestimate the army.  We have, massed under North Hill - right over there - the greatest accumulation of energy and radioactive weapons ever assembled in one spot.  I bet even this leech won't withstand the full force of all that. FRANK    [worried] Professor? PROF    [doubtful] I suppose it could be possible to overload the thing.  O'DONNELL    [smug] I'll go and give some orders.  We're gonna crack that leech in half! SOUND    HE LEAVES FRANK    Did he listen to a single thing you said? PROF    [sigh] He is the military. FRANK    Then why are you - we - even here? PROF    I fear the general wants to be able to say he consulted a scientist.  I'm convenient since I can't possibly have a relevant opinion. MUSIC   LEECH K SOUND    [UNDER] RAY GUNS, EXPLOSIONS, ETC. LEECH    Fooooood!  Rich food!  Needing more!  Ray food, energy food, liquid food!  Needing more!  More food makes more hungry!!!!  Sensing.  Sensing for food.  Ahhhh.  THERE. MUSIC   12_STOCKPILE AMBIANCE    INSIDE HEADQUARTERS TENT O'DONNELL    [incredulous and furious] It did what?  SOUND    NANA OF VOICE ON WALKIE-TALKIE. FRANK    It flew! PROF    It might be better described as a type of hovering. O'DONNELL    Shh!  Over and out. SOUND    WALKIE SQUAWK - OFF PROF    [resigned] Where did it go? O'DONNELL    The damned fools!  Why'd they have to panic?  You'd think they'd never been trained! FRANK    They couldn't exactly expect that! PROF    [urgent] Where? O'DONNELL    North Hill.  [angry sigh]  Our armory. FRANK    But that's a whole mile away! PROF    At least.  O'DONNELL    Sixty-seven men died!  And the leech just - just jumped there! PROF    I still say it hovered.  It definitely moved with some sort of self-propulsion. FRANK    I'll write that down. PROF    The way it looked, it floated across the sky, blacking out the sun, and then, when it reached its goal, it simply dropped. O'DONNELL    [snarling] How can you be so clinical about this? FRANK    I - I- PROF    It's OUR job to take notes for the scientists you will eventually have to call in. MUSIC   LEECH L LEECH    So good!  So nice!  Rich food.  Much energy.  Growwww.  Yessss.  Ahhhh.  More cells.  Now, more hungry. MUSIC   13_EXPERTS AMBIANCE    INSIDE HEADQUARTERS TENT SOUND    PACING O'DONNELL    Haven't those eggheads made up their minds yet? We've had to evacuate six nearby farms. FRANK    It's not like choosing a tie. O'DONNELL    But they're the experts! PROF    No one's an expert on this.  It's never happened before.  The physicists consider it a biological matter, and the biologists seem to think the chemists should have the answer.  We can't even agree on whose problem it is! O'DONNELL    It's the military's problem!  I don't give a hang what the thing is!  I just want to know how to destroy it!  [offhand] They better give me permission to use the bomb. SOUND    STRIDES OFF FRANK    Will that work? PROF    Well, I have a theory. FRANK    Yes? PROF    Which I hope will remain a theory. FRANK    How can I make notes if you don't tell me? PROF    The Bomb might overload it.  MIGHT destroy it.  Or give it what it needs to grow big enough to devour the entire continent.  Sooner.  SOUND    FEET STRIDE BACK O'DONNELL    Still talking!  Gah!  I've been pushing for the Bomb for a week now!  And I'll get it, but not til they run out of doubletalk! FRANK    Could be a while. O'DONNELL    [intense] I am going to destroy that leech.  I am going to SMASH it, if it's the last thing I do!  It's gone beyond national security now.  THIS is personal. SOUND    STRIDES OFF PROF    I knew you shouldn't have named it. FRANK    Why? PROF    Once you name something, you get to thinking you KNOW it.  And no matter how much you think you won't, you start applying traits to it.  Anthropomorphizing it.  Attaching motives and feelings to it. FRANK    Who says it doesn't feel? PROF    It does. O'DONNELL    [from off] Here come the bright boys now! MUSIC   LEECH M LEECH    So big.  Big now.  Big makes hungry.  So much to fill.  So much to feed.  Need more.  More good rich food. MUSIC   14_SCIENTISTS AMBIANCE    INSIDE HEADQUARTERS TENT O'DONNELL    Well, have you figured out what it is yet? ALLENSON    [weary sarcasm] Just a minute - I'll hack off a sample.  Hah. O'DONNELL    [exasperated] Have you figured out some scientific way of killing it? MORIARTY    [dry, offhand] Oh, that wasn't difficult at all.  FRANK    Really? MORIARTY    Wrap it in a perfect vacuum.  That'll do the trick.  Or blow it off the earth with anti-gravity. FRANK    Can they really? PROF    Don't be silly. ALLENSON    Failing that, we suggest you use your atomic bombs and use them fast. O'DONNELL    Yes!  [vainly trying to curb his enthusiasm]  Is that the opinion of the entire think tank? MORIARTY    [sigh]  Yes. SOUND    GENERAL HURRIES OFF ALLENSON    He should have called us in immediately!  There's no time to consider anything but force now. PROF    Have you come to any conclusions about the nature of this thing? MORIARTY    Only general ones.  Very much in line with your notes and conclusions.  ALLENSON    As you mentioned, it's a perfect converter--it can transform mass into energy, and any energy into mass. MORIARTY     Naturally that's impossible and I have figures to prove it.  We're positing that this thing was in some dormant spore-stage until it was pulled in by the earth's gravity. ALLENSON    Incidentally, we should be damned grateful that it didn't land in the ocean.  We'd have been eaten out of house and home-- FRANK    Literally. ALLENSON    --before we even knew what we were looking for. PROF    [musing] I wonder how long it will take him to get permission to use the bomb. MUSIC   LEECH N LEECH    slow grow.  Hungry.  No grow.  Dull food not enough.  Want more.  Want grow.  Want be big again. MUSIC   15_BOMBS AMBIANCE    INSIDE HEADQUARTERS TENT O'DONNELL    Brigadier-General, with all due respect sir, how many MORE scientists can there be?  We've been waiting for-- BRIG-GENERAL    [on phone] Washington had to explore every alternative before detonating an atomic bomb in the middle of New York! O'DONNELL    So now I can use the bomb? BRIG-GENERAL    We need some time to evacuate people in an orderly fashion. O'DONNELL    Sir!  This leech is still growing!  We have to stop it before it gets out of hand! FRANK    Bit late for that. PROF    Shh.  He's doing the best he can. BRIG-GENERAL    We've signed you out five bombs.  Use them well.  But not until the order comes through. MUSIC   LEECH O LEECH    slowing.  Drowsing.  Waiting.  Cells starving.  Too much need food.  Tired... SOUND    EXPLOSION LEECH    YESSSS!  Foooooood!  Much!  Too much!  Holding!  Choking!  No!  straining....  straining!  More cells.  Need more cells!  Building!  Feeeeeeeeding!  Choking?  [beat] No.  SOUND    BOMB LEECH    Enough cells now.  Rich food.  More.  Grow.  Build.  JOY. MUSIC   16_SIXTY MILES AMBIANCE    INSIDE NEW HEADQUARTERS TENT O'DONNELL    Sixty miles across. PROF    There was no way to know. O'DONNELL    This was supposed to KILL it. FRANK    At least there was no fallout. PROF    I'm sure it ate THAT too. O'DONNELL    I have to KILL IT!  Do you hear me!  The blasted thing has spread all the way to the Adirondacks! FRANK    What's next?  More bombs? PROF    I don't think it's advisable.  If we throw enough at it to crack it, we might crack open the earth's crust. O'DONNELL    The leech has to be blown up quick.  What are the bright boys hedging for? PROF    They don't know what will happen.  The concentration of bombs it would require-- O'DONNELL    Perhaps they'd like me to order a bayonet attack. FRANK    They've got to do something. PROF    It's frustrating.  I keep feeling like I should be doing more, but this simply isn't my area of expertise!  That thing thrives on force - and the scientists don't have time to consider any alternatives. FRANK    Fight fire with fire. PROF    But it's not fire.  Fire is fickle.  Fire is Loki.  Fire is a trickster.  This thing is...  is... O'DONNELL    Where the heck are the scientists? SOUND    TENT FLAP ALLENSON    [coming in] We've finished the calculations. O'DONNELL    Good.  I'll call in the strike. MORIARTY    There's a damned good chance of splitting the earth wide open with that much power! O'DONNELL    You have to take chances in war.  FRANK    He doesn't even care! PROF    He cares.  He just doesn't care about that.  Hercules himself couldn't turn the general from his course. ALLENSON    Hear us out! O'DONNELL    Your own calculations show that the leech is now growing at twenty feet per hour.  So how much time is that before it reaches this post? FRANK    He's got a point. PROF    [musing]  Hercules....  Something... ALLENSON    And speeding up.  But this can't be done in haste-- PROF    Aha!  O'DONNELL    What? PROF    I may have a counter-offer. O'DONNELL    Does it involve me blowing up the leech? PROF    It's a very dim chance, but...  [trails off] O'DONNELL    Yes? PROF    have you ever heard of Antaeus? MUSIC   LEECH P LEECH    more large.  more thought.  More memory.  Large rock and dirt and stone food.  Devoured.  Joy.  Huge mass of combustibles - light and heat and energy!  Food.  True joy!  SOUND    MEMORY SOUNDS LEECH    then all devoured.  Dark.  Cold.  Empty.  Cells Shrinking, dying, self-devouring self.  Moving.  Seeking.  Food. MUSIC   17_DRONE SHIP AMB    OUTSIDE SOUND    SMALL PLANE PASSES OVERHEAD FRANK    So that's what a drone looks like. PROF    Pretty much like any other rocket ship.  The pilot just happens to be over there in the tent. O'DONNELL    I hope you're right about this, professor. MORIARTY    The calculations all validate the hypothesis.  If what you said about the creature's motivational capability is accurate-- FRANK    There it goes! O'DONNELL    Straight up!  Son of a biscuit! PROF    It's - it's - enormous! MUSIC   LEECH Q SOUND    FIGHTER PLANE BUZZES PAST LEECH    Food!  Rich food!  Above!  Out of reach!  Why not fall?  Come to me?  Food!  ... seek. SOUND    BUZZ OF FIGHTER PLANE MOVING AWAY LEECH    heat!  Small food.  Cold!  Nothing.  Ah, little flying food, come to - oh.  Oh, yes.  Far.  There.  Huge bright glowing mass of combustibles.  Food. MUSIC   18_ANTAEUS AMBIANCE    OUTDOORS FRANK    Wow.  Now, that's a crater. PROF    You can look at it later.  I keep worrying that I've missed something. FRANK    But the leech is gone, professor!  Right up and out of the atmosphere. PROF    There's no way to be sure it won't come back. FRANK    Everybody's going to be watching for the leech. PROF    Please don't call it that. FRANK    What then?  Antaeus?  Who's that anyway? PROF    Greek Mythology.  Son of Gaea and Poseidon - the earth goddess and sea god.  He was an invincible wrestler, drawing his strength from the earth itself. FRANK    His mom.  Apron strings, even in mythology. PROF    [chuckles]  Well, Hercules had to wrestle him, and every time Hercules threw him to the ground, he rose refreshed.  FRANK    Didn't Hercules know about the earth? PROF    He figured it out.  After that, he just held Antaeus up in the air until he gave up. O'DONNELL    [off slightly] Come on, join me in some champagne.  Even you brainy folks can use a little celebration! MORIARTY    [happily] Maybe just a sip! ALLENSON    I don't mind if I do. FRANK    Be there in a minute!  [to prof] So the fighter rocketship they sent up will just keep leading it around in space til it gets tired and drops dead? O'DONNELL    Better.  It's going to take it right into the sun.  Big or not, the damn thing can't eat THAT. PROF    Lord, I hope not.  O'DONNELL    [to pilot] How's the ship, pilot? PILOT    Just reached the orbit of Mercury, sir. O'DONNELL    Fine!  Fine.  I swore to destroy that thing.  Not the way I wanted to do it - too far out to see it go up with my own eyes - If I had a choice, it would be more personal.  But the important thing is the destruction.  Destruction is at times a sacred mission.  Man, I feel wonderful! MORIARTY    [panicky]  Turn the rocket!!!!  TURN IT! O'DONNELL    What the devil? MORIARTY    Considering rate of growth, energy consumption capacity, and speed versus projected energy retention, figuring in the energy it will receive from the sun as it approaches-- O'DONNELL    Speak English! MORIARTY    [dire warning] It's gonna devour the sun. MUSIC   LEECH R LEECH    closer!  Closer!  More heat!  More light!  All!  Must have all!  Small rich food moving away.  Choice.  Nearby small food?  Far big food?  Hungry NOW.  Close first.  Catch quick, feed enough to move to big food.   Yes! MUSIC   19_TURN AWAY AMBIANCE    INSIDE HEADQUARTERS TENT PILOT    It's turning, sir! ALL    [general sounds of relief] ALLENSON    Take it out at right angles to the plane of the solar system. SOUND    RADAR [start much earlier] FRANK    So the blob is the leech and the dot is the ship? PROF    Yes.  O'DONNELL    What portion of the sky would the leech be in just now? MORIARTY    Somewhere out in that section - just over that tree. O'DONNELL    Fine.  [calling order back over shoulder]  Soldier!  Carry out your orders! ALL    [surprised concern - "what?" "huh"  "what are you up to?" etc.] FRANK    [calling] The dot is slowing down!  The blob is catching up! PROF    What are you up to, general? O'DONNELL    [grim satisfaction] I told you this was a personal matter.  I swore to destroy that leech.  We can never have any security while it is alive.  [chuckles triumphantly] I had that ship especially built. PROF    To do... what... precisely? O'DONNELL    Shall we look at the sky? SOUND    FEET, TENT FLAP, ETC. as they leave. O'DONNELL    Soldier? PILOT    Three seconds, sir! O'DONNELL    Push the button. PILOT    Yes, sir! FRANK     is something supposed to--  Whoah! MORIARTY    Not a good idea to look directly at the explosion! PROF    What... did... you... do? O'DONNELL    [smug]  That rocket was built around a hydrogen bomb.  I set it off at the contact moment. FRANK    How come there's no sound?  Thought there'd be a loud bang or something.  Is it like thunder? ALLENSON    Sound doesn't travel in a vacuum. PROF    [explaining] We're anthropologists.  O'DONNELL    [calling to pilot] Anything on the radar? PILOT    [from within] Nope!  Not a speck, sir. O'DONNELL    Men - and scientists - I have met the enemy and he is MINE.  Let's have some more of that champagne. PROF    I wish I was that sure. MUSIC   LEECH S LEECH    Catching food.  Slowing.  Tiring.  Catch.  Massive surge!  Too much!  Holding!  Holding!  Absorbing!  Building!  No!  No!  overload!  Too much!  Breaking!  Come apart!  Losing thought!  Losing cohesion!  Breaking.  Broken.  Shattered. SOUND    [long moment of silence, then in squeaky little voices:] LEECHETTE1    Hungry LEECHETTE2    Hungry LEECHETTE3    Hungry LEECHETTE4    cold.  hungry LEECHETTE5    Hungry [more and more leechettes until they populate the entire soundscape] LEECH    [MANY VOICES] hungry.  Empty.  hungry.  Empty. hungry.  hungry.  Empty [repeats under] MUSIC END CREDITS

Dave Vosburg is the Chief Innovation Officer at Local Bounti. On this episode of CropTalk #KyleTalksAgtech we discuss "If you grow it will they come?" (Short answer, NOPE) the importance of unit economics in CEA, understanding what you don't know, you don't know along with the importance of creating industry benchmarking, investor and retail relations and the future outlook for the industry. 

"Polyamory is just one form of consensual non-monogamy You might picture a romantic relationship as two people committed exclusively to one another — also known as monogamy. Consensual non-monogamy, on the other hand, involves relationships with more than one person, with the consent of everyone involved. Polyamory is just one of the ways to practice consensual non-monogamy. You may have also heard of other forms, like open relationships and swinging. It isn't the same thing as cheating So, are polyamorous people “cheating” on their partners? Nope. But this is a common misconception. Cheating includes deception and betrayal, like if you and your partner have agreed not to have sex with other people, but your partner breaks that promise. The difference between cheating and polyamory is that people who are polyamorous have shared agreements about sex and relationships with other people. It doesn't mean you're unable or uninterested in commitment People aren't polyamorous because they're unhappy about committing to a relationship. In fact, one research study showed no difference in relationship satisfaction between people who are monogamous or consensually non-monogamous. Commitment for monogamous people can mean expressing love by putting time, trust, and respect for shared agreements into a relationship with another person. Commitment for a polyamorous relationship could mean the same — just with a different set of agreements. And it doesn't mean you're down for group sex If having threesomes all the time sounds exhausting to you, then you should know that plenty of polyamorous people would agree with you. While polyamory can include sexual relationships with more than one person, it's not about having sex with multiple people at the same time. For example, a woman might have sexual relationships with two different men, but enjoy sex with only one of them at a time. It simply means… Polyamory is defined as practicing or being open to intimate relationships with more than one person. Dating as a polyamorous person means you're not looking for just one person to share a romantic or sexual connection with. Trust Just like monogamous couples, polyamorous people need to be able to trust one another. Some ways they might build trust include communicating about new partners, practicing safe sex, and keeping promises. Communication While there's a popular idea that polyamory is all about sex, some polyamorous people joke that it's more about talking about your feelings than anything else… because it's kind of true. Open, honest, and frequent communication is essential for maintaining multiple relationships in a healthy way. Consent Of course, you can't have consensual non-monogamy without consent. For most people, polyamory isn't simply a “free for all” to do whatever you want. Taking on new partners, engaging in new sex acts, and entering new commitments all requires consent for everyone involved. Mutual respect If someone considers your feelings unimportant, then a monogamous relationship with them isn't going to work. The same goes for polyamory. It isn't just about respecting your partner's feelings to be with someone else. Respecting other people — including your partners' partners — is key." --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/antonio-myers4/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/antonio-myers4/support

THE THESIS: Once again, The Party is telling us there is one way out of the dangerous dependence upon our enemies for fuel: reset the entire U.S. economy, con, blackmail and ultimately force people to purchase--or, was preferred by The Party, rent--electric vehicles. Just like Covid, there is only one behavioral kill chute of an answer. In Covid, we certainly couldn't use the abundant and safe early treatments, we could never count on dangerous natural immunity. Nope, only the mRNA injections would save us. With Russia and energy, we certainly can't drill our abundant oil, we cannot produce the widely available natural gas, or make methanol. Nope, only flipping our economy on its head will work. And, look at that: the media agrees, academia agrees, the deep state agrees, big tech agrees and big finance agrees . . . yep, The Party.  THE SCRIPTURE & SCRIPTURAL RESOURCES:  The 10 plagues God employed in Egypt THE NEWS & COMMENT: Gee . . . why don't I trust The Party to tell us the truth about Ukraine?  BREAKING: NYT reporter says there were ‘a ton of FBI informants' among the people who attacked the Capitol US is working with Ukraine to prevent biological research facilities from falling into the hands of Russians — Victoria Nuland . . . featured prominently in Stone's documentary   … Victoria Nuland, huh? Oliver Stone on Victoria Nuland and Biden Robert Malone: All Along the Watchtower; Would the Russian invasion of Ukraine be justified if it were for biodefense? The U.S. government and media think Nazis in Ukraine are a myth. It wasn't always the case, as Robert Parry reported in 2015. The era of Trump Vs. The era of Mayor Pete.  BIDEN: "It's simply not true that my administration or policies are holding back domestic energy production" Shaquille O'Neal Vs. Gas Tank Math CNN reporter: "People we've spoken to over the last couple weeks are okay with paying higher gas prices if it means holding Russia accountable" Biden economic advisor Brian Deese: "The only viable path to energy independence" is to reduce fossil fuel use to "zero." See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Remember, it is better to suffer for doing good, if that is what God wants, than to suffer for doing wrong! ~ 1 Peter 3:17 (NLT) Have you ever woken up to a raging headache, a sore throat, and runny nose? It feels miserable, right? Your mind is foggy, and you know that today's going to be horrible. Have you noticed that often times we can tend to blame God when we hurt? For example, we could sit there and lament the fact that God could have prevented us from catching that horrible cold. I mean, He's supposed to protect us, right? This is really His fault, not ours. Nope. In reality, this is the fault of at least two people: The person who decided to spread their germs and us individually, for either getting too close or not washing our hands enough to prevent contamination. Unfortunately, though this case is pretty cut and dry, we tend to blame God for the consequences of other actions which take place in our life. I've heard people blame God about getting pregnant, despite being on the pill. You had sex. One of the side effects of sex is pregnancy. The pill only works 99 percent of the time. I've heard people angry with God because they are suffering withdraws as they recover from a drug addiction. They blame God for not taking away the pain in an instant rather than having them work through the pain to recovery. The list goes on and on. All of those consequences have a common element: Humans. Because God is love, He has given us humans freedom to do whatever we want. We can choose to do things His way, or we can choose to go our own way. It's our choice. But we are not free from the consequences of those actions. And, please note, often times those consequences are forced upon someone else due to our actions. Humans hurt humans. As Peter put it in our verse today, “It is better to suffer for doing good, if that is what God wants, than to suffer for doing wrong!” In other words, there are consequences for doing good or doing bad. The consequences for doing good help others and lead to an eternal relationship with God. The consequences of doing wrong bring pain and separation from God. Today, and every day, before you take action, lay your plans at the feet of Jesus. Talk them over with Him through prayer and by reading the Bible. His truth will always lead to positive consequences.

IT'S MARIO DAY!!!!! And we are not going to really do anything about it. Nope we are going to talk about Batman and play a game about choosing which innocents die. It is going to be a great night. Cory, Frank and Peter sit at a table and record the things that influence geeks everyday. The conversation can go from comics to star wars to video games or obscure movies. join our discord! https://discord.gg/JxP7xn Check out our Youtube! https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdGNtw3f_ce27Y4sDeoAY8w --- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. https://anchor.fm/app Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/theseusmedia/support

Adam was meditating late at night in a motel 6 and pissed everybody off. Dr. Larry Farwell stops by and tells up about brain fingerprinting, how human consciousness can effect matter and how his father drew up a calculation for tunneling through the moon. Nope, he wasn't drinking. Adam's mother would be a pissed off hologram- “Get the hell out of here with those beams!” T Shirt Link https://bit.ly/3rj7fXU LINK TO ADAM'S YOUTUBE SPECIAL https://800PGR.lnk.to/ItsScaryInHereYTID ADAM'S TICKET LINKs & more: https://linktr.ee/AdamFerrara Please consider supporting the good people who support us. Thanks for all the love! https://cruzintowellness.com/adam-ferrara Learn more about your ad choices. Visit  Megaphone.fm/adchoices Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week, Mikkel and Keith play everyone's favorite game show -- that also makes them lose just a little more faith in the future. But then they find a few reasons to keep pushing forward with some of the latest trailers that dropped, including Nope, Jurassic World: Domimion, and... Destiny...?? Hear about that and more on This Week in Nerd News. Subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or Stitcher Follow Black Nerd Problems on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter

On the 46th episode of Write Effing Now, the podcast that helps you Master Writing, Marketing, and Publishing One Byte at a Time, today, we are going to learn that writer's block isn't even real. Nope, it's masquerading as something we know all too well. We are ripping the top off a common concept. Debunking a myth. This is a myth as old as the ages. But within the myth is also a mystical element of lies. This entity that takes over writers and holds them hostage on the regular is called writer's block. Ernest Hemingway called writer's block the “white bull.” I call it the “white bullsh!t.” Unravel writer's block yourself and start with these tips, then listen for more: Reframe how you think of it. That it is a necessary pain, that it is a negative eventuality, and it hurts you. These moments of searching are actually teaching you! Challenge the theory. Are you physically unable to write? Likely, no. You are not blocked. You are in judgment. Groom yourself to show up as the best form of you and accept you and love you. Your best in these uncertain stages IS perfection. We are vessels walking around holding a creative spark. Yet we look to other people to tell us that we're good enough. This is what “writer's block” is about. It is about being tangled up in our minds with the perception that our writing is not good enough and that perception is based on what we believe good enough to be. A lot of times, that has to do with the horrific standards that we put on ourselves that even we can't meet. And it has to do with other people–who have no authority over us–just what we give them. Got questions or ready to work on your book? Reach out to your host, Hilary Jastram, for guidance. Thanks for tuning in! If you like what we have to say, please share this episode, and leave us a review—especially if it's a nice one. And if you really liked this episode, subscribe and get updates on upcoming episodes, as well as read all the show notes. Don't let intimidation stop you from becoming an author or pouring your heart into any media. Writing is life. Ink is blood. Pages are bones. Words are breath. By the way, if you're wondering when is the right time to write, it's Write Effing Now! Music Credits: -------------------- Happy Excited Intro 04 by TaigaSoundProd Link: https://filmmusic.io/song/6802-happy-excited-intro-04 Bright Hopes Corporate by MusicLFiles Link: https://filmmusic.io/song/6352-bright-hopes-corporate License: http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

This week, Kirk and Paul finally discuss country music. Does that mean they won't talk about the 1980s this time? Nope!

"1. “If I were depressed, I would never go on anti-depressants.” Are you depressed? Nope? STOP TALKING. Don't put yourself into shoes you've never worn. 2. “Anti-depressants should really just be a last resort.” Wow! You must be a mental health expert! Oh wait, you aren't. (Unless you are, but most people who are would never say this.) So maybe stop acting like you know what's best for other people. Thanks! There are about a thousand things wrong with this sentence. First of all, saying what others “should” do implies you know what's best for their mental health. People who don't have mental health problems cannot know what people experiencing them should do better than those people themselves. This is just as patronizing as telling women not to drink “just in case” they get pregnant, telling people with eating disorders to “just eat!” and regulating women's bodies to a ridiculous degree. People suffering from depression are still smart, capable human beings. I have depression, and I am also perfectly able to make decisions for myself, thank you very much. Let's quit it with the “should”s! 3. “But there are just so many natural ways to combat depression.” Dude, there totally are. And if they work for you, that's great! However… many times, they don't. I've done yoga. I've meditated. I've taken herbs and supplements. I've gone to therapy. I exercise nearly every day, and I have a wonderful family, group of friends, and partner. Guess what: Without medication, I'm still depressed. And while natural remedies can be great, they aren't always easy to incorporate into your life. Yoga takes a couple hours a week, and not everyone's body is physically capable of doing yoga. Meditation requires a time of peace and quiet. Not everyone has this regularly. Natural remedies can also be expensive! Not counting medication (which is about $3 per month with my insurance) I've spent over $110 on other mental health-related things each month in an effort to take care of my depression “naturally.” I am fortunate to be able to shell this out, but for some people it's next to impossible. Asking people to try all these remedies first before turning to something that can be incorporated into their life relatively easily comes from a place of privilege. Anti-depressants can also make it possible for someone to get to a point where they can adopt other practices that may help combat depression later." --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/antonio-myers4/message Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/antonio-myers4/support

#1- On the ground with successful illegals who have returned to Latin America: Today we interview Latino success stories who voluntarily left the USA, returning in triumph to their birthplace El Salvador. The question is... why do you think they threw in the towel on the "American Dream"?   #2- Oddball Latino names PART 2: What were their parents thinking?   #3- That blistering Latin American sun: Sunburn, tans, skin cancer.... whatever happened to the hole in the ozone layer?   #4- A word or two about GOOD umbrellas, you will certainly need one or two: NOPE, this is NOT a boring topic. Just remember there is a 6 month long rainy season and you will need to know this info. Note that most umbrellas are crap and won't hold up in the rainy season.       #5- Health Insurance tips and pointers for Gringos and Expats: And why private health insurance for gringos in Mexico can be more than twice as expensive as it is in countries that are south of south of the border. #6- Do you want to get into the exploding Crypto-currency world but don't feel quite confident enough to dive in? Our own Captain Mango has developed a unique one-on-one Crypto consulting and training service (he's been deep into crypto since 2013). To get started, email him at: bewarecaptainmango@gmail.com #7- Be sure to pick up my newly updated, "LATIN AMERICAN HEALTHCARE REPORT": The new edition for 2022 (and beyond) is available now, including the latest "Stem Cell Clinic" info and data and my top picks for the best treatment centers for expats and gringos. Just go to www.ExpatPlanB.com and click on the "Latin American Healthcare Report”.

Quick-What's the best bio-hack for recovery? Ice bath? Nope. Infrared heat? Nope. Massage? Nope? The absolute best hack for slowing the aging process, fighting inflammation, accelerating the benefits of fasting is sleep. Nothing else comes close. Sleep is when Buddy the Elf comes in to decorate Gimble's. There's no customers to bump into. The mission […]

Are you kidding me? Nope, it's on!! Suds are flowing, Quarterback movement, halftime shows, and a sweet cameo from Adam Sandler to bring it home. 

Adapted by Julie Hoverson, from a story by Tom Curry, as published in Astounding Stories in 1930 A new acquisition by the museum contains a dark dark secret! Cast List Betty Young  - Julia Carson Professor Walter Marble - Don Parris Professor Young - Charles Austin Miller Andrew Leffler - Mark Olson Rooney - Reynaud LeBeouf Smythe - Chuck Burke Doctor - Mitchell Carson Fred - Marshal Latham Guard - Reynaud LeBeouf Music by Wynn Erickson Editing and Sound:   Julie Hoverson Cover Design:  Charles Austin Miller Many thanks to Project Gutenberg and Librivox for curating these classic stories. "What kind of a place is it? Why it's a special annex at the museum of natural history in 1930, can't you tell?" ************************************************ From an Amber Block [From the story by Tom Curry, published in Astounding Stories, July, 1930] Cast: Professor Walter Marble, young scientist, 30 Professor Young, old museum curator, 55 Betty Young, daughter with a clipboard, 20 Andrew Leffler, millionaire dilettante, 48 Rooney, guard, 57 Smythe, janitor, 40 Doctor, 45 Fred, workman, 25 OLIVIA     Did you have any trouble finding it?  What do you mean, what kind of a place is it?  Why, it's a special annex at the museum of natural history in 1930, can't you tell?  MUSIC Scene 1.    SOUND     ECHOING FOOTSTEPS SOUND    WOOD CRATES BEING DISMANTLED AND REMOVED PROF    These should prove especially valuable and interesting without a doubt, Marble, old man. MARBLE    Have they all been brought in and set up, professor? PROF    Check the manifest.  Betty dear, do you have that?  Should be on the clipboard. BETTY    Let's see.  Ah, yes - check, check - all checked off, present and accounted for.  seventeen huge lumps of prehistoric amber. PROF    I've told you time and time again not to bandy such unspecific terms.  Until we have them precisely dated, they are assumed to be common cretaceous amber. BETTY    Yes, father [correcting self] Professor.  But there's nothing common about the size of these pieces!  These are quite outside ...the standard deviation. SOUND    SHE WALKS ON A BIT BETTY    When you see bits of amber worked into jewelry, especially the ones with insects preserved in them, you just can't even picture something on this scale! MARBLE    It was tricky getting them out of the ground, too.  The workmen seemed afraid - didn't want to handle them for some silly reason. BETTY    Is that ...coal in the biggest one?  That dark center? MARBLE    I am inclined to believe it will prove to be some sort of black liquid, possibly a pocket of colophony. BETTY    Which is? MARBLE     [somewhat dismissive] An oil derived from amber.  [change of tone]  Professor Young? PROF    Yes? MARBLE    Even with the dark central void, I think that big one will turn out to be the largest single piece of amber ever mined.  PROF    It appears to be several tons.  It will take some maneuvering to get a proper weight on it.  Betty?  BETTY    Yes, Professor? PROF    Take this down.  Stone 1 - we'll call this large one "stone one"-- BETTY    Noted. PROF    Make up a card when you get a chance.  [back to describing] The amber is clear and pure in appearance, probably mixed with lignite. Yellow brown in color, irregular in shape. I think it is merely the thickness of the amber, and not any imperfections in its refractive structure, that make the central dark spot nothing more than a shadow. BETTY    It's like a small mountain! PROF    Nonsense.  Get some specific measurements.  Height; width through, say, four axes, at three equidistant levels.  BETTY    [resigned] Yes, professor. PROF    If you need help, Walter here is a dab hand with triangulation.  You'll help, won't you, Marble? MARBLE    Certainly.  Whatever you need.  Miss Betty, I think we had better begin by drawing a rough sketch of the block. Scene 2.    SOUND    DOOR OPENS, ACROSS THE ROOM, CONFIDENT STRIDES ENTER LEFFLER    [full of confidence] Well, well, well...what do you think of them? PROFESSOR    Ignore him. BETTY    Father!  You have to play nice.  He funds the research and gets to play philanthropic scientist. PROFESSOR    You mean pseudo-scientific philanthropist.  Yes, yes of course.  [up]  Mr. Leffler!  All present and accounted for! LEFFLER    [coming on] Everybody is talking about the big one!  Orling is coming to see, along with plenty of others.  Marble!  Did you happen to catch any stories the workmen down there were telling?  I'm thinking I'll publish something on the expedition, and that would be a great little chapter. MARBLE    I don't think it was actual stories.  Just general uneasiness and rumors of bad luck.  Something about a creature swimming in a lake of ink, but the translator says the local dialect was pretty difficult. LEFFLER    Well, monster or not, let's hope there's something good in there, something that will make all our effort worthwhile.  [walking away] Maybe I can come up with a few tales, just spice, you know... MARBLE    Superstition is curious, isn't it?  [chuckles] How can anyone think that a fossil of a creature, penned in such a cell for thousands and thousands of years, could do any harm? PROF    Superstition, by definition, is unreasonable. These amber blocks were mined in the Manchurian lignite deposits by Chinese coolies under Japanese masters. They believe anything over there. I remember working once with a crew of them that thought— BETTY    [off] [scream!] PROF    What is it, Betty dear? BETTY    It - it - it--! MARBLE    Her face is completely white! PROF    You'd better sit down. SOUND    SCUFFLE PROF    What is it that has put you into such a state? BETTY    I—I thought I saw something looking out, eyes that stared at me—-!  [laughs, but forced]  I suppose it was just Mr. Leffler's talk of monsters.  There's certainly nothing there now. PROF    Perhaps the Manchurian devil just likes beautiful young ladies, eh, Marble?  [chuckles] [walking off] Well, be careful, dear. If it takes a notion to jump out at you, call for me and I'll return presently and exorcise it. BETTY    [chuckles, but half hearted] I suppose you think I'm being hysterical, too, Mr. Marble? MARBLE    [musing] No-o-o. PROF    [coming back in]  Come along Betty, we must go home.  There's a long, interesting day ahead of us to-morrow, [going off again] and I want some time to read Orling's new work on matrices before we begin chipping at block number one. MARBLE    [confidential] I... I saw something, too.  Could it have been just some refraction of the light? BETTY    [gasp]  I—I don't know.  I thought I saw two terrible eyes glaring at me from the inky heart.  But when father laughed at me, I was ashamed and thought it was just my fancy. MARBLE    The center is liquid, I'm sure of it.  [beat] Well, we'll find out soon enough, once we get started. PROF    [off, commanding] Come along, Betty! BETTY    Be careful. SOUND    SHE WALKS OFF Scene 3.    MUSIC PROF    Betty?  Have you got the specimens we've laid out on tray 15 itemized yet? BETTY    Yessir!  8 ants, 14 mosquitoes, 32 unidentified insect portions and 3 bees. PROF    Very good.  We'll make a scientist out of you, yet.  [chuckles heartily] BETTY    I'm sure I've got plenty to do as it is.  You are being careful, aren't you? PROF    That's the dozenth or so time you've inquired.  What is it you expect to happen?  BETTY    I... I don't know. PROF    [condescending] The stones are carefully anchored so they won't fall over, and carefully protected by their canvas covers when we're not working on them.  BETTY    I know.  But do be careful. PROF    You think the fabled Manchurian beast is going to break out of that stone like a - like a chick out of an egg - and run amok?  BETTY    You said you plan to work your way into position to tap that dark central core.   PROF    Between our heaters and our chisels, we'll be through into the central mass sometime tomorrow.  It's getting much softer, now the outside shell is pierced.  Amber used to be called – still is in some cultures – the stone that burns. BETTY    [german name, but quiet]  Bernstein. PROF    Since not only does it become malleable when heated, it can actually return to its original resinous state – a state in which it is, once again, flammable! MARBLE    But, for our purposes, it is soft and permeable – much easier to dig through than say granite or basalt.  Pretty soon we'll find out whether we are right about it being liquid. We have to wait, and make some preparations for catching it, just in case. BETTY    [nervous]  Catching - what? MARBLE     The liquid, of course.  Some sort of large drainage pan should suffice. SOUND    DISTANT BELL PROF    And that is time.  SOUND    PEOPLE PUTTING THINGS AWAY, THE ROOM  QUIETING DOWN BETTY    Mr. Leffler wants to be here when the final breach is made.  Should I call him and issue a formal invite? PROF    Oh, don't bother me with him tonight.  [walks off] We can summon him quickly enough when we're nearly there - otherwise, he'll spend all day hovering about and getting in the way. MARBLE    Here's your coat, miss Young. BETTY    Thanks.  [sigh] I think it must have been my imagination.  I certainly didn't see anything odd today. MARBLE    Nor did I, but I kept thinking I heard dull scrapings from inside the block. My brain tells me I'm an imaginative fool, that nothing could be alive inside something that old - but just the same, I keep thinking about those eyes we thought we saw. [shaking it off] Just shows how far the imagination will take one. PROF    [calling from off] It's getting dark, Betty!  Better not stay here in the shadows or the devil will get you. I wonder if it will be Chinese or up-to-date American! BETTY    [laugh, slightly annoyed]  Funny how such smart men can sometimes be so dense. MARBLE    Oh? BETTY    Nothing.  Good night! SOUND    SHE WALKS Scene 4.    SOUND    DOOR OPENS ROONEY    Here you go, miss Young. BETTY    Night, Rooney! ROONEY    Stayin' late this evening, are you? BETTY    [going off] No, we're calling it a night, Rooney. SOUND    HER FEET GO OFF ROONEY    Good night, Miss Young. Sleep happy. BETTY    [from off] Thanks, Rooney! ROONEY    [whistles something irish] SOUND    BETTY'S FEET COME BACK ROONEY    Is there a problem, ma'am? BETTY    You'll be extra careful tonight, won't you? ROONEY    Well, miss, I'm always careful. Nobody can get in to harm anything while old Rooney's about. BETTY    [reluctant but urgent] I don't mean that. I want you to be careful yourself, when you're anywhere near this room to-night. ROONEY    [indulgent] Why, miss, what is there to be wary of? Nothing but some funny looking stones, far as I can see. BETTY    Of course. Scene 5.    MUSIC BETTY    [sleeping fitfully] oh… looking ...at... me! SOUND    TELEPHONE RINGS BETTY    [comes awake with a gasp] SOUND    GETS UP, OPENS DOOR PROF    [off] Hello? Yes, speaking. [annoyed] Good morning, Smythe. BETTY    Smythe?  At the Museum? PROF    Shh-shh!  [gasp]  My God! I—I can't believe it!  Is he dead? BETTY    Dead?  Who? PROF    I'll be right down, yes. SOUND    HANGS UP THE PHONE PROF    Dear, there's been a tragedy at the museum during the night. One of the guards has been killed. BETTY    Oh no!  Not Rooney! PROF    I don't know them by name.  Possibly by burglars.  And Smythe, who found him, wants me to come down and see if anything has been stolen. I must go at once. The body is in our laboratory.  Where did I leave my overcoat...? BETTY    [sniffled a bit]  Give me a minute to get dressed. PROF    No, no. No need. BETTY    [firm]  I'm going with you. PROF    You can come along later, once we have things ...tidied up a bit.  BETTY    I'll be all right. I promise you I will.  And you know I'm the only one who can keep your notes straight. MUSIC Scene 6.    AMB    MUSEUM SMYTHE     I've sent for an ambulance, Professor. PROF    Of course, Smythe.  Let me see the extent of the damage. SOUND    DOOR OPENS SMYTHE    Yes, of course.  The body is around on the left ...here?  Sir? PROF     I must check on the stones first.  See that nothing has been damaged. BETTY    [grumpy mutter] Of course.  Rooney's not going anywhere. PROF    Aha.  Nothing seems missing. BETTY    Father, they're too large for someone to just run off with. PROF    Why don't you go and check the trays in the lock room.  Make sure nothing portable has walked away. BETTY    Very well. PROF    Smythe?  The body? SMYTHE    Here. PROF    [musing]  No pulse.  Cold.  He's been dead some time. BETTY    [coming on] The lock on the room hasn't been tampered with, and – [gasp] PROF    There's nothing we can do for him, now.  It looks as though the poor fellow was set upon and stabbed a number of times by an assailant or assailants, whoever they were. BETTY    Poor Rooney!  He was so jolly and red-faced, but now - his skin is like chalk! PROF    Rather shrunken, too. Almost as if there's no blood left in his veins. BETTY    And that look on his face!  He must have been terrified of whoever killed him. MARBLE    There must have been several assassins; They beat him up frightfully.  It would take more than one man to do such damage. BETTY    [quietly] Poor man.  Who will tell his grandchildren? MARBLE    [quiet, sympathy] Yes. [up] His ribs are crushed in—see, this gash, Professor, that would be enough to cause death without any of the other wounds. BETTY    [to herself, horrible fascination] What are they looking at?  A horrible... blistered area under his arm?  And a gash – oh, that must be what killed him! PROF    Bloodless!  As I said!  It is as if the blood had been pumped out of the body! MARBLE    And yet not much blood on the ground.  I only see a couple of splotches, and those look like they're from more superficial cuts. PROF    Maybe he was dragged here from another room.  Perhaps the thieves were here to steal something in another part of the museum.  Seems to me that men desperate enough to commit such a murder would not leave without trying to get what they came after. MARBLE    Unless, of course, the killing of the guard frightened them away before they could get to their booty. SOUND    FEET APPROACH SMYTHE    I brought that doctor you asked for, Professor Young. MARBLE    Any idea when this happened, Smythe? SMYTHE    Well, he punched the clock in here at two A.M. - I seen that. MARBLE    And he never made it to his next punch? SMYTHE    Nope.  [heavy sigh] And it's the last time he'll ever do his duty, poor feller. DOCTOR    Curious odor.  [sniffs] It smells like musk, but is fetid. I suppose it's some chemical you use in your lab here? PROF    I noticed that, too.  Nothing I recognize.  Marble?  Where did he get to?  Marble? MARBLE    [off] There are wavy black lines on the tiles, leading around back of the block! PROF    You will have to be more specific.  Wavy lines indeed! MARBLE    [moving further off] come and look, then!  They go around the back, and – good god! BETTY    What?  SOUND    PEOPLE DASH TO LOOK BETTY    That - that dark “hollow” in the stone – it's completely open! PROF    Marble, get me samples of that liquid before it all evaporates, would you?  Didn't anyone think to check behind the block here?  BETTY    Everyone was pretty distracted by Rooney. PROF    [dismissive] The corpse?  I suppose, but he's certainly in no further danger. BETTY    [quiet but intense] You're more interested in your black liquid then a man who lost his life. MARBLE    [off]  It's not liquid at all!  At least not any more.  It's nearly all dried, Professor Young. [musing] Dried into those strange wavy runnels and patterns... BETTY    It looks like black lacquer.  And that smell.  I see what the doctor meant! PROF    Our chipping and hammering and the heat of the radiator causing it to expand must have forced out the sepia, or whatever it is.  [disappointed sigh] I had hoped that inside the liquid we would discover a fossil of value. MARBLE    Yes... MUSIC Scene 7.    AMB    CROWD TALKING, OFF MARBLE    Look here Betty, I guess it's just you and me that might have seen this… thing. BETTY    That hole in the amber – it's awful big!  Who knows WHAT might have been inside? MARBLE    [dubious] Could have been nothing at all… BETTY    Did that black stain look like it could have been enough to fill the entire cavity?  I'm quite sure it was full. MARBLE    I'll poke around a bit. BETTY    Be careful! MARBLE    I will.  Say, from here, does the giant block look like it's been moved? BETTY    Hold on – I have some sketches. SOUND    FLIPPING PAPERS ON HER CLIPBOARD BETTY    Gosh!  You're right!  It's shifted just a bit!  But it – it's huge!  Tons, Father said.  [rationalizing]  Oh! It must have been the explosion- or expulsion – of all that liquid.  That might very well have shifted it, mightn't it? MARBLE    [dubious] Maybe. BETTY    You're worried about those marks in the black gunk, aren't you?  MARBLE    They look like claw marks, not mere natural striations.   BETTY    Professor Marble?  Please don't look any longer. Let's leave this terrible place - for the day, anyway - until we see what happens in the next twenty-four hours. MARBLE    I must make a search.  My brain calls me a fool, but just the same, I'm worried. BETTY    Do you really think ...? MARBLE    I fear so. MUSIC Scene 8.    BETTY    Is there any further word on the murder? MARBLE    Your father has dismissed it as a botched theft attempt. BETTY    I – I can't believe it.  And what about the blood? MARBLE    The blood? BETTY    Father may be able to disregard it, but he's the one who pointed out that all of poor Rooney's blood was… missing.  Were there any other signs of struggle?  Anywhere?  Or even some sign of a break-in? MARBLE    No.  [dubious] But it might be the work of a slick professional cracksman. BETTY    And how many of those would rather randomly kill a man than hide until the guard has gone on along his rounds, tell me that? MARBLE    [chuckle] I didn't say that was MY opinion. BETTY    I'm going to try to take father home, right after lunch, if he'll go. He's so stubborn.  If you must stay, would you – please – carry a gun? MARBLE    Very well.  Not that I think it would be of much use, if I did find—-[cuts himself off] SOUND    DOOR SLAMS OPEN, IMPERIOUS FEET ENTER LEFFLER    [from across the room]  What's this I hear?  A watchman killed in the night? Carelessness, man, carelessness! MARBLE    [quiet] Betty, see if your father needs anything. BETTY    Good idea. LEFFLER    The authorities here are absurd! They hold priceless treasures and yet they allow thieves to enter and wreak their will. [arrived] You, Marble! What's all this mean? MARBLE    We do the best we can, Mr. Leffler.   It is unlikely that anyone would wish to, let alone be ABLE to, steal such a thing as that block of amber. LEFFLER    And why not?  It cost ME thousands of dollars! MARBLE    It took the use of several large machines and a good deal of manpower to bring it INTO this room.  Any attempt to similarly leave – well, it would hardly pass unnoticed. LEFFLER    Hogwash!  I understand it's been broken into!  There's pieces of my beautiful stone gone missing, mark my words! SOUND    BELL BETTY    It's time for lunch, Professor Marble. MARBLE    You'll excuse us?  Good. SOUND    THEY WALK AWAY, LEAVING LEFFLER    [fading as they leave] OF all the things!  I have contributed considerable sums to this museum, and to see my money treated as if it were no more valuable than the general run of arrowheads and pot shards! MARBLE    Phew.  Thanks for coming to my rescue. BETTY    He'll still be at it when we get back. MARBLE    yes, but I will have had some coffee! SOUND    DOOR SHUTS, CUTTING OFF LEFFLER MARBLE    Poor Rooney.  It's been preying on me.  Betty, I feel more or less responsible, in a way. BETTY    No, no! How could you have foreseen such a thing? MARBLE    Those eyes. I shouldn't have discounted what we saw.  I should have taken precautions. But I had no idea it could burst from its prison. BETTY    You will get a revolver before you search further?  [firm] I'm going to, too. Smythe has one, and I know he'll lend it to me. MARBLE    I believe Leffler has seen something, too. That's why he keeps talking about it being our fault. His talk about the devil inside the block was half in earnest. BETTY    He never seemed to take it any more seriously than – than father does! MARBLE    Perhaps he put it down to imagination, or even did not think this fossil could be dangerous. BETTY    I think Rooney could show them the error of their assumptions. MUSIC Scene 9.    SOUND    OUTSIDE BETTY    There's some kind of commotion at the museum entrance! MARBLE    Figures.  We leave the building for just long enough to eat, and something happens! SOUND    CROWD MURMURS GUARD    Stay back, folks.  The museum is closed. MARBLE    Let us through! GUARD    The museum is closed to the public, sir! MARBLE    I'm not the public!  I insist you tell me what's going on! GUARD    Come inside, then both of you.  SOUND    DOOR SHUTS, CLOSING OUT CROWD GUARD    Somethin's happened up in the paleontological laboratories.  Dunno just what, but orders come down to clear the rooms and not let anybody in but members of the staff, sir. MARBLE    Blast!  SOUND    QUICK WALKING BETTY    Walter!  Please wait!  Get yourself a gun. MARBLE    All right. You! GUARD    Me? MARBLE    [to guard] Give me your gun.  [to her] Betty, you need to stay here, where it's safe. BETTY    I'm going with you. MARBLE    As a senior staff member to a junior one, I order you to remain downstairs. BETTY    Hmph.  Very well. SOUND    HIS FOOTSTEPS GO ONE WAY, THEN HER FOOTSTEPS GO OFF IN ANOTHER DIRECTION Scene 10.    MUSIC SOUND    CHECKING AMMO IN A GUN SOUND    BETTY STRIDING PURPOSEFULLY BETTY    [talking to herself]  Good.  I knew Smythe would come through for me.  Marble may be a bright fellow, but anyone could see another gun will come in handy— SOUND    RUNNING FEET COMING FRED    [panic heavy breathing] BETTY    What is it?  Fred!  Look at me!  Tell me what's going on! FRED    [gasping and babbling] There was a black fog—I saw a red snake with legs— BETTY    A what? Oh no! You get on out of here! FRED    B-but where are you going? BETTY    To make sure the professors are all right! Scene 11.    SOUND    HER RUNNING FEET, THEY SLOW BETTY    [coughing] What's that [cough] in the air.  Phew!  It smells like—[suddenly alert] It smells like whatever came out of that stone! LEFFLER    [distant horrible SCREAM] BETTY    Walter! SOUND    SHE RUNS, GASPING, THROUGH THE FOG BETTY    [muttered] It just keeps getting thicker and thicker – I can barely see!  [up] Walter?? SOUND    FOOTSTEPS SLOW, PATTING ALONG WITH HAND BETTY    Ah, the door. LEFFLER    [whimpering, distant] SOUND    DRAGGING JUICY AWFUL NOISES BETTY    [sharp whisper]  Where are you? LEFFLER    [whimpery scream, cut off – urk!] BETTY    If only the sun would come out, the skylights might cut through some of this murk!  [up] Walter! MARBLE    [quiet but urgent] Go back, Betty, go back! SOUND    HER SLOW STEPS MARBLE    [disgust and sorrow] Oh, Leffler! [groan] BETTY    [gasp]  Here you are! MARBLE    I told you to get out of here! BETTY    Is he hurt? MARBLE    He's dead.  Just like Rooney, far as I can tell. BETTY    But he just twitched! MARBLE    Something must have a hold on him! BETTY    Some thing?  [screams] SOUND    SHE RUNS MARBLE    Get out of here, Betty!  Get to safety! SOUND    SLITHERY NOISE MARBLE    I'll keep anything from following you. BETTY    [scream breaks off with noise of effort] SOUND    SMASH OF GLASS Scene 12.    MARBLE    What are you doing? BETTY    Terrified or not, I'm not leaving you, Walter!  [noise of effort] SOUND    ANOTHER WINDOW BREAKS BETTY    But unless we get some air in here, that nasty haze will be our undoing! MARBLE    [astonished]  Good girl!  It's starting to clear a bit.  BETTY    Where are you?  I can see Leffler's … body… now, but--  Walter? MARBLE    [loud whisper] Stay clear of the amber.  BETTY    Which one? MARBLE    [loud whisper]  All of them.  I think IT is hiding among them, somewhere. BETTY    How can we tell? MARBLE    [strange urgency] Betty, please go outside and call some of the men. BETTY    What are you looking ...at...?  Oh.  That black smoke – that's not moving because of the open window, is it? MARBLE    [strained, conversational]  It's coming out from under that canvas cover.  BETTY    [shocked but trying to sound calm] That's where it is! MARBLE    The cover is too big to move all in one go by myself. BETTY    I can get— MARBLE    Don't come any closer! BETTY    I'll grab the rope from here – between us, we can flip it! SOUND    SUCKING TENTACLE NOISE BETTY    [stifled noise of horror] MARBLE    Well, it's definitely under there. SOUND    ANOTHER SLITHER MARBLE    All right... now! SOUND    FLAP OF CLOTH Scene 13.    MONSTER    [hiss] BETTY    [scream] MONSTER    [shriek] MARBLE    All red, with black patches!  Reptilian, but some sort of secondary nostrils on the – aha!  That's where the black miasma in the air comes from! BETTY    IS coming from!  It's trying to blind us with its smokescreen. MARBLE    Did you see where it went? BETTY     Other side of the block, I think!  Oh, that smell! MARBLE    It must have been right there, under the canvas, all day. BETTY     Within arm's reach of the whole staff?  How awful! MARBLE    [disgust] It came out only when there was comparative quiet, to get its food.... BETTY    We-we must kill it!  [slower] We... must… MARBLE     Betty!  Its eyes – they're hypnotizing her Like a snake!  Snap out of it, Betty! SOUND    SLITHERING SLURPING NOISE MARBLE    Betty! SOUND    THUMP, SKID, AS HE KNOCKS HER OVER, GETTING HER OUT OF THE WAY BETTY    [snapping out of it] Its mouth – that long fanged tongue! MARBLE    [noting to self]  It has the thick body of an immense python and the clawed legs of a dinosaur. BETTY    And it's horrible! MARBLE    But it also appears to have tentacles, like some sort of terrestrial octopus.... BETTY    Still horrible! MARBLE    Betty, no one has ever had such an experience as this, seen such a sight, and lived to tell of it. It must be ravenous with hunger, shut up in its amber cell inside the black fluid. I— SOUND    WHISTLING HISS – INTAKE OF AIR BETTY     I have a feeling it's about to blow! MARBLE    I think it's armored.  I'll have to aim for the head. SOUND    SIX SHOTS BETTY    [screaming]  It's coming!  SOUND    WEIRD SLITHER THUMP AS IT MOVES BETTY    Come on! SOUND    THEY BACK AWAY MARBLE    It's in front of the door! BETTY    We can't go out the window!  We're too high up!  Here. SOUND    HANDS HIM GUN BETTY    I counted and you're just about out. SOUND    CLICK MARBLE    Good gravy you're right.  [ugh, throws the empty gun]  Thanks.  Now you get moving while I distract it!  Hurry!  Run for your life! BETTY    Oh, Walter! SOUND    SHE RUNS SOUND    SLITHER, SNAP, GUNSHOTS BETTY    [off] Oh, there MUST be something! Aha! [Ugn!  Breaks glass case] SOUND    GLASS BREAKS, GRABS FIRE AXE SOUND    MONSTER LUNGES AT MARBLE, MORE GUNSHOTS, CLICK BETTY    [muttered] I won't let you die, Walter! SOUND    SHE RUNS, THEN BETTY    UGN!!!! SOUND    CHOP OF AXE INTO FLESH MONSTER    [HORRIBLE SCREAM!] MARBLE    No! Over here, you beast!  Keep looking at me! BETTY    And again! SOUND    THUMP, SQUISH MONSTER    Scream! SOUND    THRASHING MARBLE    Look out Betty!  The tail! BETTY    What?  Ugh! [smacked down] SOUND    BODY DROP MARBLE     No!  Betty! FADE INTO BLACKNESS AND SILENCE Scene 14.    MUSIC STUMBLES IN BETTY    [waking, muttering] What??  What happened?  [sudden gasp, freaking out] The monster! MARBLE    [manly agony] Oh, my darling!  Are you badly hurt? BETTY    [calming down] No.  I'm—I'm all right. But—but Walter—did it—? PROF    He's fine, but the monster is hacked to pieces, and don't think I'm simply using an unscientific term. MARBLE    I – i- when I saw you fall, I think I went a bit mad.  And then the axe was in my hand, and – PROF    [stern] And he utterly mutilated a marvelous and unique specimen. BETTY    Father!  We could have been killed! PROF    [relenting] Well, there are still some remains to examine.  They're taking the rest of it away now. PROF    I think we will find it to be some sort of missing link between the dinosaurs and mososaurs. Thus, the tentacles. SOUND    HE WALKS AWAY PROF    [lecturing as he leaves] It is surely unbelievable that such a creature should be found alive; but perhaps it can be explained. It is related to the amphibians and was able to live in or out of the water. MARBLE    Hmph.  Oh, to the devil with paleontology, Betty. You saved my life. Come out and let's get married. I love you. PROF    [droning on in the background] Now, we have many instances of reptiles such as lizards and toads penned up in solid rock but surviving for hundreds of years. BETTY    At least we're safe, Walter. And unique! MARBLE    How's that? BETTY    It's not every woman who is helped by a living fossil to make the man she loves realize he loves her! PROF    Evidently this great reptile went through the same sort of experience. I would say that there has been some great upheaval of nature, that the reptile was caught in its prison of amber thousands and thousands of years ago. Through hibernation and perhaps a preservative drug it emitted in the black fluid, this creature has been able to survive its long imprisonment. Naturally, when it was released by the cutting away of part of the amber which penned it in, it burst its cell, ravenous with hunger. SOUND    HE FADES OUT INTO CLOSING MUSIC ENDING