Podcast appearances and mentions of Gary J Friedman

Gary Friedman, author, mediator, and co-founder of the Center for Understanding in Conflict, joins The Other Chair to talk about the nuance of understanding-based matrimonial or divorce mediation and the human challenges faced by the mediator and parties that may be unique to other forms of conflict.

Gary Friedman, author, mediator, and co-founder of the Center for Understanding in Conflict, joins The Other Chair to talk about his impressions of how the field of conflict resolution and mediation has changed and the evolution of the understanding-based model and the nonprofit he founded to advance awareness and education of conflict resolution practice to bring together people in conflict in communities across the country and globally since 1982.

Welcome to The Other Chair. In this episode, Center for Understanding in Conflict co-founder Gary J. Friedman introduces listeners to the center while exploring the understanding-based approach to conflict and how it can help you bring people together in personal, professional, and practitioner settings.    Learn more at understandinginconflict.org

Gary Friedman, one of my dearest mentors and co-director of The Center of Understanding in Conflict joins us for this episode of "Why Do Pets Matter?" We're talking about pets and how mediation can be exceptionally beneficial when people are in conflict over a pet, what it takes to have a successful experience with mediation, and how mediation can help people move from a right or wrong, high conflict situation to a conversation that leads them to a better resolution for their dispute while preserving their future relationship. About Gary J. Friedman Gary Friedman has been practicing law as a mediator with Mediation Law Offices in Mill Valley, California since 1976. Prior to his work as a mediator, he practiced law as a trial lawyer with Friedman and Friedman in Bridgeport, Connecticut. After several years as an advocate, he sought a new approach to resolving disputes through increasing the participation of the parties in the resolution of their differences. At that time, he and his colleague, Jack Himmelstein, began to develop the Understanding-based model that is now practiced extensively in the United States and Europe. As one of the first lawyer mediators and a primary force in the current mediation movement, he has used this model to complete over one thousand mediations in the last two decades, including numerous two-party and multi-party disputes in the commercial and non-profit realms, in the area of intellectual property, real estate, corporate, personnel, partnership formations and dissolutions, and family law. Through the Center for Mediation in Law, Gary has trained lawyers, law professors and judges in the Center's method of mediation and a mediative approach to lawyering and collaborative practice. Since l989, he has been training lawyers, judges and psychotherapists in the United States, Europe, and Israel. He has taught courses in negotiation and mediation at Stanford University Law School and the New College of Law and has taught at Harvard Law School's Program on Negotiation and at the World Intellectual Property Organization in Geneva. Gary has written extensively about mediation and conflict resolution and is the author of A Guide to Divorce Mediation, (Workman Publishing, l993) and is the co-author, with Jack Himmelstein, of Challenging Conflict: Mediation Through Understanding (published by the American Bar Association and Harvard's Program on Negotiation, 2008).   Connect With Gary: https://understandinginconflict.org/our-teachers/gary-friedman/ https://www.linkedin.com/pub/gary-friedman/6/453/14b   Books: High Conflict: Why We Get Trapped and How We Get Out  by Amanda Ripley A Guide to Divorce Mediation: How to Reach a Fair, Legal Settlement at a Fraction of the Cost Challenging Conflict: Mediation Through Understanding

Discover what Collaborative Divorce is and why it is such a powerful option for anyone. 95% of divorces settle before going to court and so why not settle with a positive, respectful outcome? Katherine Miller shares with Mike Domitrz all about this form of divorce.   * You are invited to join our community and conversations about each episode on FaceBook at https://www.facebook.com/MutuallyAmazingPodcast and join us on Twitter @CenterRespect or visit our website at http://www.MutuallyAmazingPodcast.com**     Katherine’s BIO:  Katherine Eisold Miller is a Collaborative Lawyer and mediator with more than 30 years’ experience.  She is the founder of The Miller Law Group, a director and trainer at the Center for Understanding in Conflict and also teaches mediation at the Ackerman Institute.  Katherine is a past president of the New York Association of Collaborative Professionals.  Katherine hosts the radio show and podcast Dialogue on Divorce on WVOX radio and iTunes.  Katherine is co-Author of the #1 Amazon bestseller A Cup of Coffee with 10 of the Top Divorce Attorneys in the United States and author of the New Yorker’s Guide to Collaborative Divorce.        Links to Katherine: www.westchesterfamilylaw.com www.divorcedialogues.com Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/katherine.e.miller1 Linked In: www.linkedin.com/in/kemiller Instagram: katherineemiller271 Twitter: @keisoldmiller     Books Recommended by Katherine: Challenging Conflict by Gary J. Friedman and Jack Himmelstein Powerful Nondefensive Communication by Sharon Strand Ellison     YOUR HOST: Mike Domitrz is the founder of The Center for Respect where he helps educational institutions, the US Military and businesses of all sizes create a culture of respect throughout their organizations. From addressing consent to helping corporations build a workplace free from fear (reducing sexual harassment and helping employees thrive by treating them with respect every day), Domitrz engages audiences by sharing skill sets they can implement into their lives immediately. As an author, trainer, keynote speaker and coach, Mike Domitrz loves working with leaders at all levels. Learn more at http://www.CenterForRespect.com

Most people think of mediation as compromise, but Gary Friedman sees it differently. In his view, the process is a negotiation. Rather than competing over assets, the divorcing partners identify what they need to move forward and then find the best way to divide or allocate resources accordingly. Yes, there will be disagreements, but if you can turn around your impulse to see each other as enemies, there are ways of cooperating that produce results that are better for both parties. Gary has been teaching mediation since the 1980’s, training lawyers, law professors, judges and psychotherapists in the mediative approach to collaborative practice in the US, Europe and Israel. He is the co-founder of the Center for Mediation in Law, and he has taught courses in negotiation and mediation at prestigious institutions such as Stanford University, Harvard Law School, and the World Intellectual Property Organization in Geneva. Gary is the author of several seminal works in the field of conflict resolution, including A Guide to Divorce Mediation, Challenging Conflict, and Inside Out. Today, Gary joins Katherine to share how mediation empowers separating partners to make their own decisions, putting the people who will live with the consequences in charge of decision-making. He offers his take on mediation as a negotiation, explaining the mediator’s role in helping people keep a focus on what’s really important to them and make decisions together. Gary speaks to the value in having both partners in the room during the mediation process and the power in providing a ‘fair witness’ both parties can trust. Listen in for Gary’s insight on rejecting the cultural mythology around hating your ex and crafting solutions that benefit everyone involved. Topics Covered How mediation allows separating partners to make their own decisions Gary’s insight on the fears around not being able to work together The mediator’s role in helping people stay focused on what’s important The cultural mythology around turning your ex into an enemy Gary’s take on mediation as a negotiation rather than a compromise The value in dividing and allocating assets based on individual needs How to talk through disagreements in a way that moves you forward The necessity of having both partners in same room during mediation How honest, open conversation facilitates great relief and healing The courage it takes to work through conflict together The difference between agreeing and understanding in joint decision-making The power in having a ‘fair witness’ that both partners feel comfortable with How Gary’s quest to find a different way to be a lawyer led him to mediation Gary’s discovery that there is no set definition of what a ‘good marriage’ looks like Connect with Gary Friedman Center for Understanding in Conflict Email gary@understandinginconflict.org Resources A Guide to Divorce Mediation: How to Reach a Fair, Legal Settlement at a Fraction of the Cost by Gary J. Friedman : amazon.com/Guide-Divorce-Mediation-Settlement-Fraction/dp/1563052458 Inside Out: How Conflict Professionals Can Use Self-Reflection to Help Their Clients by Gary Friedman: amazon.com/Inside-Out-Conflict-Professionals-Self-Reflection/dp/1627227768 Challenging Conflict: Mediation Through Understanding by Gary Friedman and Jack Himmelstein: amazon.com/Challenging-Conflict-Mediation-Through-Understanding/dp/1604420529 Connect with Katherine Miller The Center for Understanding Conflict: http://understandinginconflict.org/ Miller Law Group: https://westchesterfamilylaw.com/ Katherine on LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/kemiller1