Millar Montgomery

Going through a breakup can challenge the internal direction of any man. Where to from here? Was everything back then BS? Am I really what she is accusing me of? In this podcast I cover the 3 main reasons (in my experience) that have led to me being so far stuck in my head I could barely function. Although make no mistake, being stuck in your head isn't necessarily a BAD thing.. it only is when you can't function in the world properly.. anyway check it out.

Today I talk about the importance of knowing exactly what you want and why you want it. Sometimes the things we want aren't even things that are truly our own - Do you ever feel like the reasons your parents wanted things are the same things you do..? Maybe that's ok but maybe there is also a part of you that doesn't like those things... If you don't know what you want and why you want it, you will forever be a yes man who 'goes with the flow' of those around him.... and that's not a good thing.

How many times have you attempted to have a 'productive' conversation only to find that it ends up in a war of words that all hit below the belt? It's hard as shit not to get caught up in the emotion of the situation when you have someone personally attacking you about being a crap father or loveless partner. In this podcast I give some clarity as to why people do this and how you can improve your own communication ability.

Men, enough of this people pleasing so that we don't 'rock the boat'. It's time to shake that shit up! (if it's for your benefit). What I'm saying is that too many of us (including myself in the past) start living life based upon WHAT WE THINK OTHER PEOPLE WANT US TO DO. And let me tell you from experience, that leads you to a place of misery, fear and shame because you simply cannot keep everyone happy ALL THE TIME. Instead, listen into this podcast to find out how I shifted this problem inside of my life and how you can to.

Have you ever felt like other people just 'get it' in life and you somehow come off second best. Every. Single. Time? What about feeling like others are in the 'cool' group and you're stuck on the outer looking in behind some sort of perspex barrier that prevents you from getting inside? I felt like for AGES.. before I painstakingly worked out the 3 most important traits you need to develop to unlock this potential within you.

Are you constantly in battles between your ex where you'll say one thing that annoys her and then you feel the repercussions through: - More restricted time with your kids - The Silent Treatment - Not being able to see your kids It's not uncommon. And what can happen is you end up feeling like you can't say anything at all because you're constantly walking on egg shells. Then, you feel powerless.....then frustrated...then you blow up at her and it just makes things worse.. In this podcast I go through a few actionable items you can take TODAY to stop this cycle.

How many times have you had it where you've had some great idea for it to be shot down by your partners fear/uncertainty? Where you have that seed of potential inside of you calling you somewhere or to do something but when discussing it with your partner or friend they shoot you down saying it was silly/stupid/not realistic? This happens all the time - ESPECIALLY when you have made mistakes in the past that lead those people to lose faith/trust in your ability to DELIVER the goods on whatever thing it is you promised. In this episode I run through how you should look at these challenges and step into your power as a man.

Most people need all their ducks in their EXTERNAL environment to be in line before they can be happy.. Needing the validation and permission from others and things to be happy again.. BS Here are a few facts: - There are always new problems arising in life - No one is going to give you permission to be happy In this podcast I go through how to stop this nonsense today.

It's important for every man to go through change or rebirth in his life.. and the reality is: It's happening whether you like it or not. The question is.. Do you want to be in control of it? Or in reaction to it? In this podcast I go through why lying and being wilfully blind are suffocating your progress in life. PS: It gets a bit heated at the end.. so get prepared!

After we go through the breakup we go from work/kids/family time as the main things that we do to then being in a situation where we're on our own a lot more. Then what happens is we become our own worst enemy because of the constant thoughts about the future, the past and everything in between. In this podcast I go through some practical things that you can do that will fill that void more productively... No more gambling, sex and drugs filling your time as a band aid solution, avoiding the real shit at hand. Enjoy.

Buying houses, toys, clothes, money or cars... All things that we've been told to search for and will subsequently make us happy...right? Wrong. Masculinity is more than just obtaining shit to make ourselves feel a temporary surge of serotonin. In fact, when it comes to developing yourself, coming to the conclusion that everything MUST BE LET GO is a much better place to start. Listen in to this rant.... it's important.

The man you are RIGHT NOW is the tip of the ice-burg when compared to the man you COULD BE. And the fact is that the things that are holding you back from getting from A to B are issues that YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW EXIST. How are you meant to fix something that isn't inside of your awareness? Brother in this podcast I go into detail about the questions you should be asking yourself to begin this process and start unlocking a power and potential inside of you that is laying dormant. If you've ever wondered why you keep doing the same shit over and over and just wish the cycle would stop, then this is for you. Talk soon

Soon after the breakup I went through this period of blaming others... but soon after that, I was left understanding that I needed to change something about myself but not knowing: A) WHAT or B) HOW There is no guide map and structure for pulling yourself out of that place so how can you begin to rebuild yourself and not only that, REALLY start living with the FIRE in your belly again.

As men we can get so focussed on the end goal that we forget to appreciate the present OR when life events happen and that end goal is taking away from us it can leave us feeling like failures. We continue along in life just idling through without a purpose and wonder why we don't feel good anymore. In this podcast I go through how STORIES that you have about yourself or the world are shaping how you feel (without you even knowing it) and how you can start to change them so you can lift that weight off your shoulders. Listen in for practical exercises that you can do to find happiness again.

Life's easy when you're blaming others. Life's A LOT harder when you're putting your own actions under the microscope - and for good reason. The problems that are showing up in your life today are a reflection of the man that you have been up until this point. Period. If you want change, start owning them. In today's podcast I go through why this is the case and how it practically applies to your life. Listen till the end to find an exercise that you can do to shift your perspective on the problems you have at the moment as well.

So often us men feel like we have to bare the brunt of all the pain, problems and obstacles in not only our own lives but also the lives of our children, partners, friends and family. Well, I'm here to tell you, you don't have to go in it alone. Your family wants to go on a JOURNEY with you. So open that option up to them. LIFE IS PAIN, so show them how to deal with it best by DOING it yourself. Listen in to find out how you can apply this inside of your own life.

In today's episode I talk about 'man blaming' off the back of some videos I've posted recently. There are some comments in there about BLAMING men and not women...am I a man basher? Listen in to find out my thoughts on this issue.

Today I riff on TRUST after a troll called me out on Facebook. It got me thinking....Is trust different for people at different ages? What does this mean for you as a father and a partner? How can you trust again after someone burns you? Listen in to find out.

As some of you may have noticed.. Man Up With Millar is no longer! In this podcast I go into why I changed the name and what it means for you as a single father being the king of your kingdom! I cover: - How to look at change in your life so it happens smoothly. - Why 'manning up' is BS

So, after going to my regular salsa dance night and realising that I was definitely not where I wanted to be...I realised that I had to accept that I was shit before I could move on.... See, I was judging the shit out of myself for where I was and not appreciating that I was learning something new! So in this podcast I'm literally at home after I've been dancing, having a red, and getting real, raw and honest about the whole experience AND how it relates to where you're at right now as a single dad.

Let's face it. Going through a breakup with the mother of your kids can leave you feeling lost and uncertain....in more ways than one. Will I see my kids again? Why did this happen? Who the FUCK am I? If there's one thing for sure it's that this breakup has given you an opportunity. The door is open for you to grow and learn from this.. but are you ready......Really? Listen in.

Today I talk about the difficulties that arise when separating and deep down still wanting that other person in your life. Is this because you 'love' them or because you 'need' them? When the mother of your kids breaks up with you, many men will struggle to let go of her because of some kind of ownership or possession they believe they still have... but this is not love. Listen in to find out how you can make this distinction for yourself.

In this podcast I talk about a recent experience I had with saying bye to my son after drop off. It cut me deep and re-opened a wound from the initial stages of the breakup when I had to drop off the kids and felt like I was a failure and doing the wrong thing by my kids. I talk about: - How there is always going to be pain in life - How you can get through the pain quicker - How you can pull out the lessons and principles in life that will give you happiness and fulfilment for longer.

Most men struggle with self-awareness. In fact, most people struggle with it. Today I talk about the importance of finding YOURSELF and how you can do that through the breakup itself. We need to move away from being mindless working robots and move into a place of reflection and being at peace with our emotions... how do we do that though? In this podcast I cover: - The warning signs that I saw which told me I wasn't happy - What most men do to lose themselves whilst in a relationship - The identity shift you need to make to find yourself again.

In this podcast I interview Robert Kandell, author of the book Unhidden and host of the Tuff Love Podcast. Rob works with men and women on improving communication in their relationships by helping them with tools and techniques but most importantly looking at themselves first. Here we talk about: - Robert's coparenting situation and the learnings he's had as a result - How to deal with narcissists! - How you can start improving your communication today

A man's purpose is the most important thing in his life. Men who lack purpose will lack direction, motivation and drive. They will wonder why they are here and feel like working DOGS who are living their life for the needs of others. In today's podcast I talk about how you should go about tapping into this important part of your life.

Sean Whalen is a single-dad doing big things. Author of 'How To Make Sh*t Happen', Creator of Lions Not Sheep and The Revolution Podcast, Sean knows a thing or two about being through tough shit after a breakup with the mother of your kids. In this podcast we cover: - How Sean went from wanting his ex DEAD to now having a great co-parenting relationship - His rise from being suicidal and the lessons he took away from those moments - The shift in mindset you must make if you want to live an empowered life again

As men, from an early age we get taught how to WORK, PROVIDE, GRIND and seek out SEX. We are not taught how to be still, reflect, dig deep into ourselves and go on the journey within. Work, hustle, grind, sex, sleep, repeat. Today I talk about how to BALANCE your masculine and feminine. We all have both within us, but if left untapped and not practiced we sell ourselves short. If you struggle to connect to the HERE and NOW or struggle to connect to your emotions (other than anger) then this is for you. Tune in!

Jeff Scult is the founder of One Golden Thread - A 'Tree-Shirt' company that is centred around connection and reminding us of our inherent golden nature. After going through some big life events Jeff changed his tune on life, choosing to let go of the trauma and pivot towards a new direction. In this podcast we cover: - Jeff's experience with breaking up with a long term partner who had a child and how he was able to rebuild - The shift you need to make to GIVE more love in a sustainable way - How you can shift focus away from the past and future and into the NOW - How to get past your grudges, trauma and roadblocks in your life Listen to the end for a special gift for all listeners... Check out www.onegoldenthread.com

Without a set of 'rules' to being a man or at least guidelines, its hard to know exactly what to do in times of stress or struggle. In this podcast I go through the '4 Agreements' for any man to live his life by. But simply listening to these is not enough... you must embody them. It takes consistency and constant self-examination. If you can truly take these on board your life will improve - I guarantee it.

A massive fear that I personally had after the breakup was questioning if I was ever going to be able to be in another relationship again that was supportive and accommodated to the fact that I had kids. I was worried that I would meet my 'one and only' and then she might turn around and say 'nah sorry you've got kids'... In this podcast I talk about how to shift your mindset away from this and into empowerment where YOU are the prize... Listen in...

In this podcast I talk about whether or not you SHOULD get back with the mother of your kids... it can be a certain decision for some men, for others it can be unsure and scary because of the implications it can have on the kids. I talk about a few fundamental concepts to take into account when doing this.

Sometimes we can think that the battles are all outside of us... The mother of our kids... Parents... The court system.. But the reality is that behind closed doors when we're all alone, the biggest battle of all is within ourselves! WE are our own worst enemy with the things we think, say or do to ourselves. Tune in to find out how to get through this.

I know how it can feel when you've been through the breakup and that possibly you have failed everyone that you really cared about. Well, in this podcast I get clear on when you have and when you haven't failed...

Many people think that getting into a relationship is easier than being single. The reality is, especially for men, that it becomes harder. More things to organise, better communication and being attentive to multiple facets of another person. Money, Intimacy, friendship, children, leading... Shit is hard to manage. Listen into this podcast about how to manage all these hats

Today I talk about two secrets to having a 60 year long marriage from none other than my own Granny and Grandad! I asked them what was the key to having a long marriage while I was overseas visiting them in Scotland. Their answers were great!

I'm sure that you, as I did, got caught up in endless spirals of negative thoughts, worries and concerns.... What if there is another man around my kids? This is just my luck? I don't deserve to be happy... And when it comes to breaking through these spiralling dark thoughts, there is one strategy that you must use, which most don't...This, without a doubt got me through dark times after the breakup and also most recently while I was overseas.

One of the biggest issues women have when it comes to men is that they don't know what we want. A friend of mine who coaches single ladies recently did a poll and that was the number one response. Check out this episode to understand why this is the case and how you can smash through this with a rock solid identity as a man.

One of the most common issues I see (and also have) is that us men struggle to ask for help. Instead, bottle things up, go into avoidance of the issue or self-destructive behaviour. So, why don't we? and when is the right time to ask for it? In this podcast I go through what you need to know to stop this from happening.

Why is it that some people take years to actually heal the traumas of life events? There is something most people misunderstand about healing, which is that its an ACTIVE process...time is not enough. There is one thing that most people miss when trying to move on with life which is what I cover in this podcast. If you are struggling with moving on and find that constant little reminders of the hurt you once had keep raising their head...then listen in!

The battles that we fight as single dads can sometimes seem insurmountable and never ending. Battles with trying to get more visitation with the kids, having financial battles with the mother of your kids, battles in the court room or battles within our own heads. When is it time to give this up... Is there ever a good time? In this podcast I cover: - The key distinction you need to make in being able to surrender and when to not - The battle you are going to lose EVERY time if you don't listen - How you can make life a lot easier for yourself by surrendering every time

Everything in your life is a DIRECT reflection of that person that you are at this very moment. Your job, your friends, your relationships... everything.. This might be a bit hard to hear, but its true. So if this is the case you must ask yourself, WHO do I have to become in order to have the life that I want? In this podcast I cover: - How to shift your perspective to take on the power in your life - The reasons why YOU must be the one to change FIRST

How do you get motivated when the things you want in your life seem so far away? How can you bridge the gap when A) the target seems so far away and B) you have to deal with a constant barrage of things from your ex, work and life. I cover: - The #1 misconception people have when it comes to 'getting motivated' - The strategy I get all of my clients to go through when struggling to get motivated

It's time to stop walking away from emotional flare ups because 'there's just no point'. Think about what repeatedly withdrawing from disagreements communicates to women.. In this podcast I cover: - A strategy that you can use to deal with emotional flare ups when they happen - The message that you're communicating when you won't engage in conversation - The legacy that you're leaving behind as a result of being this kind of man

In this episode I get DEEP. Deep into why men are the most disempowered they have ever been and why I believe it has gotten to this point. You will discover: - How to pull yourself out of this and into empowerment - How to live a more authentic life so you can be a better father.

Seek first to understand and then to be understood. And when I'm talking about understanding your ex I don't just mean listening to the words that she's saying....In this podcast I cover: - A powerful technique that I take all of my clients through when improving this area - Where your currently falling down when trying to communicate

The illusive and evil EGO! How is this showing up for you at the moment? If there's one thing for sure its that if you are ruled by your ego communication with the mother of your kids will be difficult and you will feel entitled and expectant of things in your life.. The ego is there to protect us but we are not our EGOs! In this podcast I cover: - Some warning signs to look out for when your ego comes out - How your ego is suffocating your own growth - The importance of letting the old you DIE in order to grow

In today's podcast I get into the difference between fear based decisions and making decisions that are PROACTIVELY in alignment with your purpose or the life that you actually want to live. I cover: - How you're currently living life on everyone else's terms and it will leave you disempowered and scared - How you can shift your perspective on failure to empower yourself to take risky action - How you can use your purpose and drive to improve your relationship with yourself and mother of your kids

How do you stay open with your emotions without getting smacked down from your partner or ex-partner saying its too much? Where is that line between too much and 'just enough' emotion? In todays podcast I cover: - The framework you need to making sure this doesn't happen - What women are really saying when they say 'be more open to me' - How you've gone about it in the past was 'too little, too late'

Have you ever been in a relationship where your partner would tell you: 'Its too much', 'Your over the top', 'I feel like you want me more than I want you'?? One thing that women HATE is neediness.. but why does this happen to men? Why do we get stuck in that trap of constantly chasing our OWN partner? Listen in!

What is the difference between guilt and shame? If there's one thing for sure, its that one of these will thrust you into action while the other will keep you stuck in no man's land FOREVER. I cover: - An actionable task that will make the shift for you - A great resource that will help you on the journey - What is happening when negative things keep showing up in your life