DNA Surprises

DNA surprises are often devastating to the people who uncover them, but imagine if the truth was a relief? Danielle grew up believing that her mother had four children by four different men, making all of her siblings half-siblings. After taking a DNA test, Danielle learned that she actually shared a father with her younger sister. This news was more than welcomed by Danielle, who had fond memories of who she thought was a step-father. She shares how this information affected her and how she's building a relationship with her biological father through a different lens. While Danielle has wondered what her life would have been like if she'd always known the truth, her overall attitude about he DNA surprise is one of positivity and silver linings.Thank you for sharing your story, Danielle.CONTENT WARNING: In this episode, there is some discussion of childhood sexual abuse that Danielle's raised father perpetrated against her. Please take that into account before listening.

At the end of every DNA Surprises episode, I ask my guests two questions. I ask for advice for people in our community, and I ask for advice for parents keeping a DNA surprise from their child. Time and time again, guests implore parents to tell the truth. But when is the right time to tell? And are the ramifications different than when a DNA surprise is uncovered with a DNA test?In this week's episode, Meaghan shares how one day, her parents took for a long walk and revealed the truth - her dad is not biologically related to her. She then shares the fallout from that - connecting with new family members while balancing the fact that her biological father is not a safe person. Meaghan also shares how her DNA surprise led to her to create a book for people who have had similar experiences. I'll be sure to share that when it's available.Thank you for sharing your story, Meaghan.Support the show.Find Meaghan at:IG: you_belong_here_recovery_book meaghancarriere.commeaghancarriere.substack.com

Hindsight is 20/20. After experiencing a DNA surprise, it's easy to look back at moments throughout our childhoods and realize that the truth was there all along.  Growing up in Indiana, Brittany always felt like an outsider. Her parents were divorced, and when she asked her dad if she could go live with him, he revealed that he wasn't her biological father, which her mother denied.Years later, Brittany took DNA test, which revealed that her lifelong father was not her biological father. In this episode, Brittany shares how the revelation rocked her sense of identity and her lifelong relationships. She also discusses how she's connected with her newfound family and found a sense of belonging.Thank you for sharing your story, Brittany.Support the show.

This is part 3 of a 3-part series. If you haven't listened to parts 1 and 2, be sure to go back and listen before starting this episode.In Part 3 of Elizabeth's story, we find out what happened after she visited her family and met her biological father for the first time ever. She shares what those first moments felt like and where things stand after her whirlwind trip. She also gives an update on her relationship with her raised family.One of the things I commented on more than once throughout this series is how much can change, and how fast. If you've just uncovered your DNA surprise, or even if you've been in this experience for a while, I hope that this series has given you hope - that things can change - whether that change looks like making contact with newfound family or simply coming to terms and feeling better about where things are for you.Thank you Elizabeth, for sharing so much of your story.If you have a DNA surprise that you'd like to share, submit your story at DNASurprises.com.Get early, ad-free access to episodes at patreon.com/dnasurprises.

So what happened after Elizabeth sent off those letters to her siblings? In Part 2 of Elizabeth's DNA surprise story, she reveals how she was able to make contact with several of her newfound siblings - and her biological father. I loved this conversation because we get a glimpse into the other side of the DNA surprise equation - the found family's point of view. I reconnected with Elizabeth in January 2025 and two of her siblings, Aerin and Emily joined us. Her siblings share what it was like to learn about Elizabeth, and Elizabeth shares how it felt to finally connect with her biological father and family.This is Part 2 of a 3-part series. If you haven't listened to Part 1, go back and listen to Elizabeth's DNA Surprise.Thank you to Elizabeth, Aerin, and Emily for sharing your story.So, what happened when Elizabeth went to visit her family? Listen to Part 3 to find out.If you have a DNA surprise that you'd like to share, submit your story at DNASurprises.com.Get early, ad-free access to episodes by supporting the show.

Welcome to a new season of DNA Surprises. We're kicking this season off with a triple-episode premiere as we follow Elizabeth on her DNA surprise journey.Elizabeth grew up knowing that the man she called “Dad” wasn't her biological father, but she also grew up believing that the man she believed was, didn't want to be part of her life. Her childhood was fraught with abuse and neglect and by the time she discovered the truth, she already had strained relationships with her parents and siblings.This is part one of Elizabeth's story. In this episode, Elizabeth shares what she learned after taking her test - that her conception was the result of sex trafficking and that her mother did not know who her father was. Thanks to modern DNA testing, Elizabeth was able to find her biological father but had been unable to make direct contact with him. She was on the verge of sending letters to her siblings but had no idea what would happen next.Listen to Part 2 to find out what happens next.Thank you for sharing your story, Elizabeth.If you have a DNA surprise that you'd like to share, submit your story at DNASurprises.com.Get early, ad-free access to episodes on Patreon.

Welcome to the season 10 finale of DNA Surprises. Buy one, get two. No, this isn't an ad for the latest testing kit sale. In this week's episode, I'm joined by Dave and Denise, a married couple who discovered that they were both NPEs after their grandson took a DNA test.Before you listen to this episode, I want to take a moment to remind listeners that family secrets like these don't stay hidden in the modern age of DNA testing, and Dave and Denise are a great example of this. They didn't uncover their surprises because they took a test. Even their grown children wouldn't have surfaced the secret. It was their curious grandson with a love of genealogy and heritage who led to the truth. For both of them.Thanks to Dave and Denise for sharing their stories.Support the show

When someone uncovers a DNA surprise, their family tree changes. That sounds simple, but the reality is that our roots, so many of the things that make us, us, come from generations before us. In this week's episode Melissa shares her profound journey after discovering that the man who raised her is not her biological father. From uncovering clues in her late grandmother's writings to learning about her biological father's tumultuous past and building new relationships with half-siblings, Melissa delves into the complex emotions and revelations that emerged along the way. Through her genealogical research, Melissa connects with her ancestral roots, understanding more about her family's history and the legacies that shape her identity. Thank you for sharing your story, Melissa.Resources:Bold and Queerinstagram.com/boldandqueerSupport the show

If we don't laugh, we'll cry. DNA surprises can be gut-wrenching and difficult experiences, but some of us can find humor in almost any situation. In this week's laughter-filled episode, Lauren LoGuidice tells the story of how she learned she was donor conceived. Lauren discusses how she never fit in with her raised family but was regularly dismissed and gaslit when she questioned why she looked so different. She shares how she connected with her donor-conceived siblings, her genetic father, and how things are with her parents today.She doesn't disguise her journey with humor, rather, she infuses it into her storytelling. You can check out Lauren's comedy, including the latest on her upcoming film, at her website linked in the show notes.Thank you for sharing your story, Lauren.Resources:Lauren LoGiudice - Comedy and Characters for MisfitsSupport the show

When someone opens up their DNA test results, the outcome isn't always an explosive surprise. Sometimes, it takes a while of pulling at a thread before a truth is unraveled. In this week's episode, Christine shares how her curiosity about one of her ethnicity results led to her shocking discovery that her dad isn't her biological father. But in another twist, even after finding out the truth about her paternity, the mystery about her ethnicity remained.Christine discusses both of these DNA surprises and how they've affected her relationships. She also shares how her surprise has transformed her perception of herself, for the positive.Thank you for sharing your story, Christine.

Imagine uncovering your DNA surprise, experiencing the shock and devastation that comes with it, and then learning that the surprise wasn't a total surprise after all? Earlier this season, we heard a story like this, and in this week's episode, you'll hear another.When Tamara confronted her mom about her DNA surprise, she was shocked to learn that they'd already discussed it when she was younger. For some reason the memory didn't stick with her, and when she learned the truth,it came back to her. Yet she still had to contend with this revelation as though she was hearing it for the first time.Tamara details her search for her biological father after being given incorrect information and facing roadblocks from her found family. Just before we recorded our interview, she got a surprise that gave her the answers she was looking for.Thank you for sharing your story, Tamara.Support the show.

After a DNA surprise is uncovered, many moments from the past come into focus. Especially moments that, in hindsight, were missed opportunities for parents to tell the truth.In this week's episode, Christina shares how she uncovered her DNA surprise and how she's feeling about seven months into her discovery. She  discusses how she's struggling with feelings of anger at her mother, especially when she reflects on times when her mom could have disclosed the truth about who her biological father was.Before listening to this episode, please note that there is a brief discussion about child sexual abuse that may be upsetting to listeners. If you want to avoid this content, skip over timestamps of approximately 24:00-26:00.Thank you for sharing your story, Christina.

As we've heard earlier this season, many people within the DNA surprise community saw their test results as mere confirmation of something they'd long suspected. But as heard in this week's episode, not everyone was able to put their finger on just why they felt different.Chaya never felt like she fit in with her family. She found solace in music and the friendships she formed in the metal scene during her rebellious teen years. Then one day, during a heated exchange with her parents, her mother revealed that the man she believed was her father was not. She pursued a relationship with the man her mom identified, only to learn even more shocking information about her paternity.Thank you for sharing your story, Chaya.

After three years of making this podcast and speaking to people who've experienced life-altering DNA surprises, I've noticed several trends. One trend is that oftentimes, the biological father is someone a guest knew from childhood. Another trend is a tumultuous relationship with the mother. In this week's episode, Kim shares her emotional journey after discovering a family secret through genealogical research. She discusses the shock and clarity that came with this revelation, her strained relationship with her mother who kept the secret, and the dynamics with her siblings and other family members who knew the truth but were sworn to secrecy. Kim also speaks candidly about her efforts to build a relationship with her biological father and how the presence of this secret created issues throughout her life.  Kim first told her story a few years ago on NPE Stories, hosted by Lily Wood. Listen here: Spotify or Apple Thank you Kim, for sharing your story. Support the podcast.

If you've had a DNA surprise, how many times have you been told you should write a book? This week's episode is a story that is truly stranger than fiction. Traci shares how, at 19, her mother revealed the truth about her paternity. This truth sent Traci reeling, but her mother insisted that she always knew the truth. Her mom went on to explain the events that led them to that moment. It's a story straight out of a true crime novel, and Traci didn't remember any of it. Traci goes on to share what happened after the revelation, including how she moved forward with her parents, who married a few years after her DNA surprise. Thank you Traci, for sharing your story. Resources: After the Rotting ⁠Support the podcast.⁠

"I knew it!" Or,  "I had no idea." When it comes to DNA surprises, some people are completely blindsided. Others felt like they knew it all along. Danielle never felt like she fit in with her family. Her mother died when she was just three years old, and for the rest of her childhood, she was raised by her dad, who travelled often for work, and her aunt, her mother's sister. Danielle knew that her dad had difficulty conceiving her older half-sister with his first wife, and she questioned if they were biologically related. More than a decade after her dad died, another aunt gave her a letter he'd written to her, which described the sometimes tumultuous but genuine affection her parents had for one another - a confession of sorts?  When she learned that her sister had taken a consumer DNA test, Danielle finally had her chance to uncover the truth. After getting her results, doing extensive research, and learning surprising information from her mother's best friend, she finally did. Thank you Danielle, for sharing your story. Listen to ad-free episodes at patreon.com/dnasurprises.

Black sheep. Golden child. In the DNA surprise community, these are labels we hear a lot. In this week's episode, Sarah shares her emotional journey before, during, and after, her DNA discovery. Growing up, she never felt like she fit in, but her concerns were often dismissed. Many years later, her suspicions were confirmed–her dad, Joe was not her biological father. But she didn't know for sure who was. Sarah's story also touches on the role that alcohol played within her family and in her own personal journey. She discusses why she ultimately decided to seek sobriety and create strong boundaries with her raised family, and how she's pursuing relationships with her newfound relatives.  Thank you for sharing your story, Sarah.

Welcome to season 10 of DNA Surprises. This season is jampacked with incredible stories that explore the emotional journeys of DNA discoveries. If you've had a DNA surprise, you'll hear stories that you may relate to and gain inspiration from. If you haven't had a DNA surprise, this season will continue to give you insight into the complexities of identity, family, and the human experience. In this week's episode, Krissy shares her long journey to uncovering her DNA surprise, when she learned that the man she believed was her biological father is not. Her surprise didn't start with a DNA test, but rumors that she confronted her mother about, which were quickly denied. Years later, Krissy found herself staring at a photo of herself and her two brothers, and that nagging feeling returned. So she took a DNA test. Krissy shares how the revelation affected her and her relationships and how she eventually found her biological father - along with a couple of additional DNA surprises. She also shares why she's made the decision not to openly discuss the discovery with her parents. Thank you for sharing your story, Krissy.

Intergenerational trauma. It's something we talk about a lot here. The most common cycles we discuss are the patterns of keeping secrets and the patterns of shame. In this week's episode, you will hear a story about a cycle of NPEs.  When Bobbi became pregnant with her third child, she knew that was not in a position to care for another baby. She relinquished her child to a family member, but kept the specific circumstances around the birth a secret - most people thought she was a surrogate. Just a couple of years later, Bobbi was shocked when, long before consumer DNA testing, she learned that the man she'd believed was her biological father was not, and that both of her parents knew this secret her entire life. And then there was one more. Years later, when she took a consumer DNA test, Bobbi uncovered that her mother is also an NPE, upending another long believed story. I want to especially thank Bobbi for being open about her experience as a mother in this situation. She shares a vulnerable, honest, and empathetic perspective for all of us to consider. Thanks again to Bobbi for sharing her story. Bobbi's Book: Descendant Deception --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/dnasurprises/support

Who would I have become if I had known the truth? How were the interactions I had throughout my life colored by an unknown truth? These are questions so many of us ask ourselves, over and over and over again. The reality is, we will never know, no more than we would know who we would have become if we'd been born in another country. Part of the DNA surprise experience is coming to terms with this. In this week's episode, I'm joined by Guy, who I first interviewed back in Season 3. When we first spoke, Guy had just experienced his surprise, and he wasn't sure what he was going to do next. One of the things that struck me was how freeing Guy found the revelation to be.  Guy shares what's come up for him since we first spoke, including the many ways he's been analyzing - and reanalyzing his past. In the two years since we spoke, Guy's come to the realization that the facts of his situation don't matter much to him, and that all he has is now.  PS - If you think DNA surprises are all sad all the time, this episode is a good reminder that it's OK to laugh sometimes. Thank you, Guy, for sharing your story. Guy's DNA Surprise (Original episode) --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/dnasurprises/support

If you've had a DNA surprise, you might listen to this podcast from the perspective of someone who just uncovered their results. Or did it happen years ago, when consumer DNA testing became popular? What has changed for you since the day you opened your test results? In this week's episode, I'm joined by a guest from Season 1, Crystal. Crystal had her DNA surprise the same month and year that I did. When we first spoke, it had only been a few months since she received her results. So much has happened since then. Crystal shares what it was like when she finally met her biological father for the first time, as well as how her relationships have evolved over the years. If you're in the thick of your DNA surprise right now, I hope this episode gives you hope that things will get better, because they will. Thank you Crystal for sharing your story. Crystal's DNA Surprise (Original episode) --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/dnasurprises/support

When people uncover DNA surprises, they are often left to unpack the mysteries themselves. From the who, what, when and where around their births to where their newly identified family members are today, we spend hours searching newspapers, online archives, and obituaries. Many times, we find what we're looking for. Sometimes, we don't.  In this week's episode, BettyJo shares how any of her questions remain unanswered. Her mother wouldn't share many details and their relationship, along with her relationship with her raised siblings, and disintegrated after the discovery. BettyJo believes her father is from Mexico, where endogamy, the custom of marrying only within the limits of a local community, clan, or tribe, is common. This makes locating specific people tricky. BettyJo shares how she's managed losing the close relationship she once had with her mother, as well as how she's coping with so many unknowns. Thank you for sharing your story, BettyJo.    --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/dnasurprises/support

Did you know that the DNA Surprises podcast community meets in a virtual support group every month? We started the Third Thursday Meetup in 2023 to serve as an additional resource for NPEs, late-discovery donor-conceived people, and late-discovery adoptees to find community and support. Third Thursdays have quickly become one of my favorite nights of the month, due in no small part to the two people who are sharing updates in this special double update episode. Liann and Pat uncovered their DNA surprises in very different ways. Liann found out long before consumer DNA tests, while Pat uncovered her surprise more recently. In the first half of this week's episode, Liann joins me to share her progress as she moves in the advocacy stage of her DNA surprise journey. At around the 27-minute mark, Pat joins me for the second half of this episode and shares how she's doing nearly a year and a half after her surprise. Be sure to listen to Liann and Pat's episodes, and then listen to their updates. Thanks to Lianna and Pat for joining me again. Liann's original episodePat's original episode By the way, if you want to sign up for Third Thursdays, go to dnasurprises.com/events.  --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/dnasurprises/support

Not every DNA surprise has a happy ending. And sometimes, what seems like a happy ending takes a turn. But the opposite is also true. In this week's episode, Shannon shares how she learned the truth about her paternity and had to wait several years before she could identify her biological father. When she finally found him, he was receptive, before quickly closing off any hope of a relationship…until he had another change of heart. Thank you for sharing your story, Shannon. If you'd like to learn more about Shannon's therapy practice, visit CreatingSpaceTherapy.com. --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/dnasurprises/support

Many people in the DNA surprise community grew up with dads, or birth certificate fathers, BCFs as they're often called. We are raised by these men and then one day, through a DNA test or other means, we learn that they are not our biological fathers. But what if you never really felt like you had a dad? How does a DNA surprise affect you? In this week's episode, Alissa shares how her free-spirited mother had her and her twin brother on her own, before marrying their stepfather. Alissa remembers asking questions - “Do we have a dad?” And getting the same explanation each time. He lived in another state, he had gone to prison, they'd tried to make it work but did not. In her early 20s, Alissa attempted to build a relationship with who she believed was her biological father, Jim, even finding an “Uncle Dad” through his brother Rick. After taking a DNA test, everything she thought she knew was upended. Thank you for sharing your story, Alissa. For early access to ad-free episodes, join me over on Patreon at patreon.com/dnasurprises. --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/dnasurprises/support

DNA Surprises bring up a range of emotions, and if there's one thing I hope I've made clear on this show, all those emotions are valid. In this week's episode, Joan shares why her DNA surprise was more of an interesting adventure than a dramatic event.  Her story is one of optimism, curiosity, and patience - it took her a decade to solve her mystery, and many questions remain unanswered. She discusses how she uncovered the truth and why she ultimately feels like her DNA surprise revealed that she had the best of both worlds. Thank you for sharing your story, Joan. Do you have a DNA surprise you'd like to share? Submit your story at ⁠www.dnasurprises.com⁠. Get early access to ad-free episodes by joining the ⁠DNA Surprises Patreon community⁠! --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/dnasurprises/support

Welcome to the 100th episode of DNA surprises! OK, technically I've had more than 100 episodes already, but this is the 100th DNA Surprise story I've had the privilege of sharing with you all. So, in celebration of 100 episodes, I thought we'd take it allll the way back to the beginning. In this week's episode, I'm joined once again by Yvette, my very first guest on the podcast.  I am eternally grateful to those Season 1 guests. They responded to my call for guests with no guarantees on how their stories would be told or where. They trusted me with one of the most difficult experiences of their lives - and that's where this all began. If you haven't yet listened to Yvette's story, I'll give you a quick recap here, but I encourage you to pause this episode and go back to Season 1, episode one: Yvette's DNA Surprise. In our first conversation, Yvette was coming fresh off of her DNA surprise. She'd figured out who her biological father was, and actually remembered meeting him one time in her life before he died. She had connected with her newfound siblings but hadn't yet had the opportunity to meet them. Yvette had also gone no contact with her mother because of her anger and pain about the secret.  One of the biggest sources of joy in her story was her ethnic shift, with the discovery of her Sicilian heritage. Yvette felt immediately connected to her ancestors when she learned about this background and immersed herself in learning about the food and culture. One of the biggest sources of her pain is around the missed opportunity to connect with her biological father, who she seemingly shared countless similarities with. That was nearly two and half years ago, and in this week's episode, Yvette joined me to share where things are now. She shares how she's continued to navigate her ethnic shift and build deep connections with her Sicilian roots. She also gives a surprising update on her relationship with her siblings and tells us where things currently stand with her mother.  Thank you for sharing your story with us again, Yvette. Do you have a DNA surprise you'd like to share? Submit your story at ⁠www.dnasurprises.com⁠. Get early access to ad-free episodes by joining the ⁠DNA Surprises Patreon community⁠! --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/dnasurprises/support

It's your story. You have the right to tell it. This is something we hear a lot in the DNA surprise community - I say it a lot myself. In this week's episode, Ruby shares a unique perspective on this philosophy. Ruby took her DNA test expecting to learn more about her Mexican heritage, and instead uncovers a half-sibling and learns her biological father is different from the man who raised her. Ruby reflects on her childhood suspicions, her complex relationships with her parents, and navigating the newfound truth.  She discusses the impact on her mental health, the role of therapy, and how she plans to incorporate her experience into her work as an artist. Thank you for sharing your story, Ruby.  --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/dnasurprises/support

What would you do if you found out that your biological father wasn't the man who raised you, but someone you'd known in the periphery of much of your life? Someone who'd photographed weddings, even done your taxes? In this episode, Beth shares her journey after discovering her biological father was a long-time colleague of her mother. Beth talks about the strong connections she had with her birth certificate father and who she believed was her paternal grandmother, and the feelings she experienced after learning the truth. She reveals how she's formed a close relationship with her biological father and maintains a lot of compassion for her mother. Thank you for sharing your story, Beth. Do you have a DNA surprise you'd like to share? Submit your story at www.dnasurprises.com. Get early access to ad-free episodes by joining the DNA Surprises Patreon community! --- Support this podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/dnasurprises/support

What never fails to surprise me is how innocently DNA surprises begin. In this episode, we hear from Doe - yes, that's a pseudonym - who uncovered her  DNA surprise in 2021.  A skillful genealogist, Doe bought a DNA test for her husband, who was curious about his family history. As it just so happened, she purchased the test during a buy one, get one free sale, so she decided to take a test herself. When she received her results, she learned that not only was her birth certificate father not her biological father, but that the story she'd always believed about her mother was false. In this episode, she shares how the discovery and the continued secrecy have affected her, and how she uses her experience to help others. Thank you for sharing your story, Doe.

Welcome to the Season 8 finale of DNA Surprises. In this episode, I'm joined by Deanna, who shares her NPE story. Deanna has experienced unspeakable amounts of hardship in her life, from abandonment to abuse to her DNA discovery. Her story is difficult - and powerful. You'll hear how she's still reckoning with the what-might-have-beens and the whys. You'll also learn how she's moving forward, including being the person she needed when she was younger. Thank you for sharing your story, Deanna.Register for the DNA Surprise Retreat by August 15 to guarantee your space!September 19-22, 2024 | Phoenix, AZSupport the Show.Reserve your space at the 2nd Annual DNA Surprise Retreat by August 15!September 19-22Phoenix, AZ Learn more at www.dnasurpriseretreat.com!Join the DNA Surprises Patreon community! IG: @dnasurprisesTwitter: @dnasurprisesTikTok: @dnasurprisesWebsite: dnasurprises.comDNA Surprise Retreat | A bridge to healing for NPEs, adoptees, and DCPs after a DNA discovery.

Every DNA Surprise is unique—the who, what, when, and why surrounding an NPE vary from person to person. Still, after nearly 100 interviews, I've noticed consistent themes in these stories. One of those themes is a complicated mother-child relationship. When Jennifer took her DNA test, she had no idea that her family tree would change forever. As it turns out, both her mother and grandmother had relationships with the same man, making Jennifer's aunts also her sisters, and her cousins also her nieces and nephews. To add some clarity here, this man is not Jennifer's grandfather - he is a man that her grandmother had an affair with, resulting in two of her aunts. She discusses how she's faced the shame and stigma of this complicated story, and how she's navigated her relationship with her mother.Jennifer and I spend quite a bit of time talking about the mother-daughter dynamic, and how she was able to radically accept their relationship for what it is - not what she wants it to be. If you're currently struggling with this part of your story, I hope this conversation helps you.Thank you to Jennifer for so openly sharing her feelings on this, as well as her story.Resources:Contact: 00jharris@gmail.comRegister for the DNA Surprise Retreat by August 15 to guarantee your space!September 19-22, 2024 | Phoenix, AZSupport the Show.Reserve your space at the 2nd Annual DNA Surprise Retreat by August 15!September 19-22Phoenix, AZ Learn more at www.dnasurpriseretreat.com!Join the DNA Surprises Patreon community! IG: @dnasurprisesTwitter: @dnasurprisesTikTok: @dnasurprisesWebsite: dnasurprises.comDNA Surprise Retreat | A bridge to healing for NPEs, adoptees, and DCPs after a DNA discovery.

DNA Surprises are confusing. They're confusing for the people they happen to as they try to make sense of newfound information. With so many characters, twists, and turns in each story, they're also confusing for people listening to DNA Surprises stories.This week's DNA surprise story is no exception. In fact, it features a triple-NPE. So before we begin, I'm going to break down who's who.Jessica grew up with a birth certificate dad, who she believed was her biological father. We'll refer to him as Dad 1. She will go on to tell us about her stepfather, who, after a series of events, becomes Bio Dad 2.  Her mother then reveals the truth, or so Jessica thinks - and she identifies Bio Dad 3. To be clear, none of these men are her biological father.Jessica shares the long and winding road she took to finally identifying her true biological father, with the help of an Ancestry DNA test and her detective skills. She also reveals how she's navigating a new relationship with her bio dad and an ethnicity shift that uprooted her from a strong Italian heritage. Thank you for sharing your story, Jessica.Support the Show.Reserve your space at the 2nd Annual DNA Surprise Retreat by August 15!September 19-22Phoenix, AZ Learn more at www.dnasurpriseretreat.com!Join the DNA Surprises Patreon community! IG: @dnasurprisesTwitter: @dnasurprisesTikTok: @dnasurprisesWebsite: dnasurprises.comDNA Surprise Retreat | A bridge to healing for NPEs, adoptees, and DCPs after a DNA discovery.

To paraphrase The Beatles, we get by with a little help from our friends. This is especially true when it comes to DNA Surprises. In this week's episode, coworkers Robyn and Ida share their NPE discoveries, which happened right around the same time. In fact, Robyn used her genealogy skills to identify Ida's father.They each reflect on their personal journeys and how they've supported each other as they navigate their emotions. While every journey is unique, Ida and Robyn share many similarities. Their biological fathers have accepted both and both have understanding and empathy for their mothers.Thank you to both Robyn and Ida for sharing your stories.Support the Show.Reserve your space at the 2nd Annual DNA Surprise Retreat, from September 19-22 in beautiful Phoenix, AZ. Learn more at www.dnasurpriseretreat.com!Join the DNA Surprises Patreon community! IG: @dnasurprisesTwitter: @dnasurprisesTikTok: @dnasurprisesWebsite: www.dnasurprisespodcast.comDNA Surprise Retreat | A bridge to healing for NPEs, adoptees, and DCPs after a DNA discovery.

DNA surprises rarely happen in a vacuum. So many of the people I speak to have experienced other traumas throughout their lives, long before sending off DNA tests. In this week's episode, Courtney shares how her mother's mental health struggles played a large part in her childhood. She knew she was adopted by her stepfather when she was young and grew up feeling abandoned and ignored by her biological father. As an adult, they began repairing their relationship, which led to them taking a DNA test. It's then that Courtney gets the surprise of her life and begins the search for her true biological father. Courtney's story is one of vulnerability, compassion, and a journey to radical acceptance. Thank you for sharing your story, Courtney.Resources:DNAngels.orgSupport the Show.Registration is now open for the 2nd Annual DNA Surprise Retreat. Join us from September 19-22 in beautiful Phoenix, AZ. Learn more at www.dnasurpriseretreat.com!Join the DNA Surprises Patreon community! IG: @dnasurprisesTwitter: @dnasurprisesTikTok: @dnasurprisesWebsite: www.dnasurprisespodcast.comDNA Surprise Retreat | A bridge to healing for NPEs, adoptees, and DCPs after a DNA discovery.

In this bonus episode of DNA Surprises, I chat with Iliamari Vazquez Houston, a therapist based out of the Phoenix metro area. Iliamari will facilitate a session on generational trauma - and generational healing - at the DNA Surprise Retreat, September 19-22, 2024 in Phoenix, AZ.We discuss what generational trauma is and how we can begin to break the cycles of secrets and shame in the DNA surprise community. She also shares some excellent resources for folks interested in learning more about generational trauma and healing.If this discussion resonated with you, join us at the DNA Surprise Retreat this year, where we will cover this and more topics in community with people who understand the emotions that follow a DNA Surprise.Resources:withanopenheartllc.cominstagram.com/withanopenheartllcBreak the Cycle: A Guide to Healing Intergenerational TraumaSelf-care for Latinas Support the Show.Registration is now open for the 2nd Annual DNA Surprise Retreat. Join us from September 19-22 in beautiful Phoenix, AZ. Learn more at www.dnasurpriseretreat.com!Join the DNA Surprises Patreon community! IG: @dnasurprisesTwitter: @dnasurprisesTikTok: @dnasurprisesWebsite: www.dnasurprisespodcast.comDNA Surprise Retreat | A bridge to healing for NPEs, adoptees, and DCPs after a DNA discovery.

Sometimes, after DNA surprises are revealed, our relationships with our raised parents become strained. Sometimes, this leads to estrangement. But for others, these surprises simply compound already strained relationships. When Dawn had her DNA surprise, she was already virtually no contact with her mother. In this week's episode, she shares why she initially made the decision to go little to no contact with her raised family, largely due to her mistreatment compared to her other siblings. She reveals why she took her DNA test to begin with, and how she finally learned the truth about her parentage. While Dawn's relationships with her raised family remain distant, she's built incredible relationships with her newfound step-siblings, who insist that had her biological father known about her, he would have loved and accepted her. Thank you for sharing your story, Dawn. Support the Show.Registration is now open for the 2nd Annual DNA Surprise Retreat. Join us from September 19-22 in beautiful Phoenix, AZ. Learn more at www.dnasurpriseretreat.com!Join the DNA Surprises Patreon community! IG: @dnasurprisesTwitter: @dnasurprisesTikTok: @dnasurprisesWebsite: www.dnasurprisespodcast.comDNA Surprise Retreat | A bridge to healing for NPEs, adoptees, and DCPs after a DNA discovery.

In this bonus episode of DNA Surprises, I chat with Jenna Hedstrom, E-RYT 500 and Expert Breathwork Facilitator. Jenna will lead a breathwork session at the DNA Surprise Retreat, September 19-22, 2024 in Phoenix, AZ.During our conversation, we discuss what breathwork is and how it benefits us. We also chat about how to overcome blockers around practicing something new, like breathwork. If this discussion resonated with you, join us at the DNA Surprise Retreat this year, where we will cover this and more topics in community with people who understand the emotions that follow a DNA Surprise.Resources:jennapaigehealing.comfacebook.com/jenna.hedstrom/instagram.com/jennapaigehealing  Support the Show.Registration is now open for the 2nd Annual DNA Surprise Retreat. Join us from September 19-22 in beautiful Phoenix, AZ. Learn more at www.dnasurpriseretreat.com!Join the DNA Surprises Patreon community! IG: @dnasurprisesTwitter: @dnasurprisesTikTok: @dnasurprisesWebsite: www.dnasurprisespodcast.comDNA Surprise Retreat | A bridge to healing for NPEs, adoptees, and DCPs after a DNA discovery.

(CW: Suicide, abuse)A common question in our community is “when is the right time to tell the truth about parentage?” While some say there is never a good time to tell, many believe that the truth should be shared from birth. In this week's episode, Miranda's story highlights the importance of telling early - and often. Miranda's mother never hid the truth about her paternity, but she still recalls the shock of hearing it explicitly stated when she was a young child. She shares how her curiosity about her biological father led her to take a DNA test, which created connections with newfound family members. Miranda's story is filled with challenges - and love. Despite the abuse, rejection, and profound loss she has experienced, she maintains compassion for everyone involved. Thank you for sharing your story, Miranda. Support the Show.Registration is now open for the 2nd Annual DNA Surprise Retreat. Join us from September 19-22 in beautiful Phoenix, AZ. Learn more at www.dnasurpriseretreat.com!Join the DNA Surprises Patreon community! IG: @dnasurprisesTwitter: @dnasurprisesTikTok: @dnasurprisesWebsite: www.dnasurprisespodcast.comDNA Surprise Retreat | A bridge to healing for NPEs, adoptees, and DCPs after a DNA discovery.

During this bonus episode of DNA Surprises, I interview advanced yoga teacher Lanita Ugstad. Lanita will facilitate a gentle movement session at the DNA Surprise Retreat, September 19-22, 2024 in Phoenix, AZ.We discuss how yoga is beneficial for people who have experienced trauma, and what it means to facilitate a session through a trauma lens. Lanita also offers some guidance for people who are apprehensive about practicing yoga (hint: you don't need to be super flexible!).If this discussion resonated with you, join us at the DNA Surprise Retreat this year, where we will cover this and more topics in community with people who understand the emotions that follow a DNA Surprise.Resources:sacredequinejourneys.comhttps://www.instagram.com/sacredequinejourneys Support the Show.Registration is now open for the 2nd Annual DNA Surprise Retreat. Join us from September 19-22 in beautiful Phoenix, AZ. Learn more at www.dnasurpriseretreat.com!Join the DNA Surprises Patreon community! IG: @dnasurprisesTwitter: @dnasurprisesTikTok: @dnasurprisesWebsite: www.dnasurprisespodcast.comDNA Surprise Retreat | A bridge to healing for NPEs, adoptees, and DCPs after a DNA discovery.

Did you grow up feeling different from your family? That feeling of being inexplicably out of place haunts many people in the DNA surprise community throughout childhood and adulthood - before they uncover the truth.In this week's episode, Sarah shares how while she always felt different from her family - she was more sensitive and had a different worldview. Still, she never suspected that her beloved father wasn't biologically related to her. After his unexpected and tragic passing, Sarah and her sister decided to take 23andMe tests, beginning her shocking DNA surprise journey.She reflects on how this discovery has further strained her relationship with her mother, but has yielded an incredible relationship with her newfound sister.Thank you for sharing your story, Sarah.Support the Show.Registration is now open for the 2nd Annual DNA Surprise Retreat. Join us from September 19-22 in beautiful Phoenix, AZ. Learn more at www.dnasurpriseretreat.com!Join the DNA Surprises Patreon community! IG: @dnasurprisesTwitter: @dnasurprisesTikTok: @dnasurprisesWebsite: www.dnasurprisespodcast.comDNA Surprise Retreat | A bridge to healing for NPEs, adoptees, and DCPs after a DNA discovery.

In this bonus episode of DNA Surprises, I speak with therapist Venessa De La Cruz about betrayal trauma. Venessa will facilitate a session on Betrayal Trauma at the DNA Surprise Retreat, September 19-22 in Phoenix, AZ.She defines what betrayal trauma is and how things like DNA surprises can manifest for us both physically and mentally. We also dive into how to begin rebuilding trust again.If this discussion resonated with you, join us at the DNA Surprise Retreat this year, where we will cover this and more topics in community with people who understand the emotions that follow a DNA Surprise.Resources:Instagram.com/emdrsocialworkerignitehopellc.comSupport the Show.Registration is now open for the 2nd Annual DNA Surprise Retreat. Join us from September 19-22 in beautiful Phoenix, AZ. Learn more at www.dnasurpriseretreat.com!Join the DNA Surprises Patreon community! IG: @dnasurprisesTwitter: @dnasurprisesTikTok: @dnasurprisesWebsite: www.dnasurprisespodcast.comDNA Surprise Retreat | A bridge to healing for NPEs, adoptees, and DCPs after a DNA discovery.

So many DNA surprises start with a gift. Mothers Day. Fathers Day. Prime Day. Christmas. Almost every month, consumer DNA testing companies offer deals encouraging people to give a DNA test as a present. If you're listening to this podcast, you know how this sometimes turns out.In this week's episode, Shannon shares how after receiving a DNA test as a gift from a friend, she learned that her birth certificate father is not genetically related to her. As it turns out, her biological father was a well-known figure in the small town she was raised in. She tells us how this discovery has affected her family and her sense of identity, and how she's building a relationship with her newfound siblings.Thank you for sharing your story, Shannon.Support the Show.Registration is now open for the 2nd Annual DNA Surprise Retreat. Join us from September 19-22 in beautiful Phoenix, AZ. Learn more at www.dnasurpriseretreat.com!Join the DNA Surprises Patreon community! IG: @dnasurprisesTwitter: @dnasurprisesTikTok: @dnasurprisesWebsite: www.dnasurprisespodcast.comDNA Surprise Retreat | A bridge to healing for NPEs, adoptees, and DCPs after a DNA discovery.

This special episode of DNA Surprises features Megan Irwin, a licensed therapist specializing in grief, loss, trauma, and PTSD. Megan will facilitate a session on parts work at the 2024 DNA Surprise Retreat, September 19-22 in Phoenix, AZ.During our discussion, we covered what parts work is (and isn't) and why people typically think of it in terms of their inner child. Megan shared how recognizing and freeing our parts leads to a greater sense of harmony within oneself. We also chatted about her session at the retreat.If this discussion resonated with you, join us at the DNA Surprise Retreat this year, where we will cover this and more topics in community with people who understand the emotions that follow a DNA Surprise.Resources:Big T, Little T - An Interview with Trauma Therapist Megan Irwinmeganirwincounseling.comNo Bad PartsJanina FisherSupport the Show.Registration is now open for the 2nd Annual DNA Surprise Retreat. Join us from September 19-22 in beautiful Phoenix, AZ. Learn more at www.dnasurpriseretreat.com!Join the DNA Surprises Patreon community! IG: @dnasurprisesTwitter: @dnasurprisesTikTok: @dnasurprisesWebsite: www.dnasurprisespodcast.comDNA Surprise Retreat | A bridge to healing for NPEs, adoptees, and DCPs after a DNA discovery.

Send us a text message (sorry, we aren't able to reply, sorry!).Race. Ethnicity. Heritage. These are complex topics without the added nuance of a DNA surprise. Author Janeen Jackson grew up with two younger brothers and her parents in an African American household. In this week's episode, she shares how, through a DNA test, she not only learned that she is adopted, but that her biological father is a white man. Janeen discusses the complexities of navigating familial bonds, and her journey to acceptance and understanding. She also reveals the purpose behind her children's book, Hello, Sweet Baby An Adoption Journey which helps children and adults navigate and understand the nuances of adoption and identity.Thank you for sharing your story, Janeen.Resources:Hello, Sweet Baby An Adoption JourneyBlog: Mixed-Up DiarySupport the Show.Registration is now open for the 2nd Annual DNA Surprise Retreat. Join us from September 19-22 in beautiful Phoenix, AZ. Learn more at www.dnasurpriseretreat.com!Join the DNA Surprises Patreon community! IG: @dnasurprisesTwitter: @dnasurprisesTikTok: @dnasurprisesWebsite: www.dnasurprisespodcast.comDNA Surprise Retreat | A bridge to healing for NPEs, adoptees, and DCPs after a DNA discovery.

Send us a text message (we cannot reply).If there is one thing I hope we can all agree on, it's that families come in all shapes and sizes. Many people with DNA surprises end up with two, three, or more fathers and just as many mothers, too. When Steve experienced his DNA surprise, he already had two men in his life that he called “Dad.” After he learned the truth about who his biological father is, he added a third to his list. In this week's episode, Steve shares how he uncovered the truth. Trust me when I say, it's an extremely unique story, and not much surprises me these days. Thank you for sharing your story, Steve.Support the Show.Registration is now open for the 2nd Annual DNA Surprise Retreat. Join us from September 19-22 in beautiful Phoenix, AZ. Learn more at www.dnasurpriseretreat.com!Join the DNA Surprises Patreon community! IG: @dnasurprisesTwitter: @dnasurprisesTikTok: @dnasurprisesWebsite: www.dnasurprisespodcast.comDNA Surprise Retreat | A bridge to healing for NPEs, adoptees, and DCPs after a DNA discovery.

Send us a Text Message.Most of the time, when I speak to people on the podcast, we learn that the reason they took the test was out of curiosity or for fun. Maybe they were given the DNA test as a gift from a friend or significant other. So imagine my surprise when I learned that this week's guest was given her Ancestry DNA kit by her mother.Welcome to Season 8 of DNA Surprises. In this week's episode, Julie shares how she uncovered the truth about her paternity after her mom gifted her a DNA test. She recalls her “party people” parents and a childhood spent around the world after they divorced and her mother remarried. As we often say on this podcast, DNA surprises can happen to anyone, of any background. From conservative upbringings to more unconventional lifestyles, there are no rules about who can be rocked by the shocking results of a DNA test.Thank you for sharing your story, Julie.Support the Show.Registration is now open for the 2nd Annual DNA Surprise Retreat. Join us from September 19-22 in beautiful Phoenix, AZ. Learn more at www.dnasurpriseretreat.com!Join the DNA Surprises Patreon community! IG: @dnasurprisesTwitter: @dnasurprisesTikTok: @dnasurprisesWebsite: www.dnasurprisespodcast.comDNA Surprise Retreat | A bridge to healing for NPEs, adoptees, and DCPs after a DNA discovery.

There is never a good time to discover that the man you've called “Dad” for your entire life isn't biologically related to you, but I imagine that having this realization as he lays in a hospital bed, dying, must be among the worst.In the season 7 finale of DNA Surprises, Dana Schmalenberg shares how she uncovered the truth that both of her parents held tightly until the day her father passed. She reveals the shocking truth about her biological father, a man who fathered 9 other children, many of whom share strange similarities.She also reveals how her DNA discovery led her to a new career path, and why she created a new resource for her fellow NPEs. Thank you for sharing your story Dana.Resources:https://www.navigationalnarratives.comSupport the showRegistration is now open for the 2nd Annual DNA Surprise Retreat. Join us from September 19-22 in beautiful Phoenix, AZ. Learn more at www.dnasurpriseretreat.com!Join the DNA Surprises Patreon community! IG: @dnasurprisesTwitter: @dnasurprisesTikTok: @dnasurprisesWebsite: www.dnasurprisespodcast.comDNA Surprise Retreat | A bridge to healing for NPEs, adoptees, and DCPs after a DNA discovery.

How do you define family? For so many of us, DNA surprises have made us reflect deeply on this question. For Wyatt, Cassidy, Cody, and Angela, the answer is different depending on who you ask.Twenty-plus years ago when Wyatt, Cassidy, and Cody were born, fertility clinics didn't advocate for disclosure. So when their mother and father asked Angela, a clinic employee who'd befriended their mom, to donate her eggs for their subsequent pregnancies, they opted to position Angela as more of a family friend.Their families kept in touch over the years, until contact suddenly stopped. After many twists and turns, today, their family looks different to each of them. Wyatt lives with Angela, her husband, and their biological and adopted children. Cassidy views Angela more like a fun aunt. Meanwhile, Cody's relationship is a little more distant. In this week's episode, the four of them discuss their journeys from the beginning to where things are now. They also share what changes they'd like to see in the fertility industry. You'll hear throughout the episode that each of the siblings has a different perspective on their stories, from when they found out to how they found out. I won't get on my soapbox again, but I believe this highlights the importance for each of us to be entitled to our own feelings about our own stories.Thank you to Angela, Wyatt, Cody, and Cassidy for sharing your stories.Support the showRegistration is now open for the 2nd Annual DNA Surprise Retreat. Join us from September 19-22 in beautiful Phoenix, AZ. Learn more at www.dnasurpriseretreat.com!Join the DNA Surprises Patreon community! IG: @dnasurprisesTwitter: @dnasurprisesTikTok: @dnasurprisesWebsite: www.dnasurprisespodcast.comDNA Surprise Retreat | A bridge to healing for NPEs, adoptees, and DCPs after a DNA discovery.

Many of us who have had DNA surprises spend some time wondering “What if?” What if we'd been raised in a different house, with our newly discovered biological parent? What if we'd known the truth from the beginning? What would our lives look like now? Would they be better? Or…would they be worse?In this week's episode, Lisa shares how she uncovered her shocking DNA surprise, learning that her biological father is her dad's best friend. She shares how she's built beautiful relationships with her newfound family, which has led to her wonder what life would have been like if she'd known them earlier. Ultimately, she reveals why she believes everything it happened as it should.Thank you for sharing your story, Lisa.Support the showRegistration is now open for the 2nd Annual DNA Surprise Retreat. Join us from September 19-22 in beautiful Phoenix, AZ. Learn more at www.dnasurpriseretreat.com!Join the DNA Surprises Patreon community! IG: @dnasurprisesTwitter: @dnasurprisesTikTok: @dnasurprisesWebsite: www.dnasurprisespodcast.comDNA Surprise Retreat | A bridge to healing for NPEs, adoptees, and DCPs after a DNA discovery.

Picture this: you grow up with a sibling who is convinced they are not your dad's biological child. No one knows about DNA surprises or NPEs or anything like that, but they just know their dad isn't THEIR dad. Years later, after commercial DNA testing becomes commonplace, you offer them some peace of mind. All of your siblings take a test to prove, once and for all, that your parents are the biological parents of all of your siblings.Except…they aren't. Only it's not your sibling who is the NPE. It's you. In this week's episode, Pat shares how she learned in her sixties that she doesn't share a biological father with her siblings. She discusses how she was able to piece together a story long after the main players have passed, and how she's forged new relationships with found family.Thank you for sharing your story, Pat.Resources:Who Even Am I Anymore? DNAngelsSupport the showRegistration is now open for the 2nd Annual DNA Surprise Retreat. Join us from September 19-22 in beautiful Phoenix, AZ. Learn more at www.dnasurpriseretreat.com!Join the DNA Surprises Patreon community! IG: @dnasurprisesTwitter: @dnasurprisesTikTok: @dnasurprisesWebsite: www.dnasurprisespodcast.comDNA Surprise Retreat | A bridge to healing for NPEs, adoptees, and DCPs after a DNA discovery.