Ain't Life a Bitch Podcast: Comedy | Advice | How NOT to

In “Yes or No?!” Langley just wants a simple answer, but inadvertently may offend the Native Americans.  Sorry.  You were here first.

In “The Running Girl!” Langley laments on another female who literally ran away from him.

In “Langley Interrupted!” Langley discovers the effects of using too much industrial adhesive in a poorly ventilated room and Flip steering wheel unicorn poop.

In “AAAAGGGGHHHHHHHH!!! (Live)” Langley returns from a two week hiatus and struggles to find peace after a recent incident that nearly ended in 3 casualties, a decrease in the homeless population, and a ruined pair of new underwear.

In “Gimp… Or GIMP?!” Langley asks in his usual polite and calm manner that you be more specific when posting an online ad for a “gimp” so as to limit everyone’s overall embarrassment, especially those poor homo-gnomes.

In “You’re An ***hole!” Langley offers his opinion on a pseudo-celebrity who was recently discourteous to him in a grocery store parking lot.

In “Electrical Tape?!” Langley discovers that he got the shaft from a dirty, filthy, ball washing bastard, and not in any sort of gratifying pornographic sort of way.

In “What the —- Is This —- ?!” Langley discovers a glob of mysterious brown stuff on his phone at the ol’ day job.

In “Stop Talking Like That!” Langley bitches about the way some people talk. It’s the shortest and most annoying episode so far.

In “Lauren Graham Frenched Me!” Langley recounts a brief but sultry encounter with the hottest Gilmore Girl and a cheeky monkey.

In “Circle, Jerk!” Langley learns the rules of the road when driving in a Roundabout.

In “Running On Excitement!” Langley explains why it’s important to remember even the dumbest of holidays during a financially challenging time, and why diamonds are not his best friend.

In “THE VD EPISODE!” Langley highlights the history of Valentine’s Day, Feb. 14, throughout American history.

In “Needs Me A J.O.B!” Langley needs a JOB.  Pretty cut and dry.

In “—- Your Truck!” Langley explains why it’s wrong for people with SUVs to forget that other people on the roads actually exist, and why he doesn’t want to die wearing stained underwear.

In “Coming In Loud and Clear!” Langley explains why the convenience of being able to talk on the cellphone at any given moment isn’t always convenient, and now has a craving for chicken. Plus, a very special announcement from the Producers.

In “Mooooove Along, Little Dogie!” Langley takes us on a journey 6 miles from his apartment that ultimately took over an hour, and gave up for another soothing dose of cold medicine.

In “Count Down!” Langley counts down the ‘best of’ 2016 ALAB episodes!

In “Cover Your Mouth!” Langley has a cold and coughs a lot, and he’s pissed about it.

In “Merry Christmas and Shit!” Langley catches us up on the past two weeks of Construction Destruction after having to skip a week due to technical difficulties, tells us about his new laptop, and wishes us all a happy holiday…  Especially poor Ukraine Mary.

Check back next week for an all new episode of the ALAB podcast.

In “Morning Mariachi!” Langley continues his 4 part rant about the ongoing earthquake safety construction at his apartment complex, and delights us with a pelvic thrusting Mariachi wake up.

In “Jack THIS Hammer!” Langley gets pissy about earthquake safety and his shitty computer that’s destroying the production quality of this show.

In “Brad Cock Blocked My Funny Turkey Episode!” Langley asks his wonderful listeners to help children have a Christmas this year. Damn you for feeling, Brad!

In this departure from his normal ranting, “We The People!,” Langley attempts to offer some sense of hope for anyone feeling heartbroken and afraid after the results of the 2016 Presidential election.

In “Give Me the Job!,” Langley describes a challenging job interview upon the realization that certain foods should be avoided prior to important meetings in order to evade embarrassing situations.

In “Give Me Some Validation,” Langley gets his panties in a knot over the parking meters and parking deck fees in his new home city.

In “Service With A Smile,” Langley risks never being able to eat in a restaurant again by complaining about pissy hosts.

In “I Should Have Stayed Home,” Langley simultaneously deals with multiple idiots while trying to find a parking space.

In “Jamaica’n Me Angry!,” Langley educates us on the process of applying for a typical day job, and getting his number snagged by a telemarketer from Jamaica.

In “Langley Goes To Hollywood (Blvd),” Langley goes to Hollywood Blvd. Was that not clear from the title? He takes you on a ride down Hollywood Blvd in heavy traffic. Which ends up being about one block.

In “Yo Fault,” Langley talks about the perils of parallel parking in Los Angeles.

In “Ducking Automatic Erect,” Langley freaks the duck out over the way technology insists on changing the words he types to things that make no funning sense. Download this Injuns ahead on the trail episode for all the fudge.

In “Hotel No Sleep For Ya,” Langley entertains us with his recent cross country adventure.  His head grew heavy and his sight grew dim, he had to stop for the night… At a crap hotel where sleep was not allowed.

In “Stop Calling Me,” Langley offers advice on ending bot calls from political campaigns.

In “Chewed Fingernail,” Langley is on a mission to find out who left him a disgusting present.  He also recounts an old roommate issue.

In “Go **** Your Selfie,” Langley complains about strangers taking selfies in public and catching him in the background doing embarrassing things.  This is the most clean and sharable episode you’re ever gonna get.

In “Can I Get A Lift?,” Langley tries to avoid getting Staphylococcus by plea-ing for more sanitary peeing. Potty etiquette is everything.

In “Bird Shit,” Langley talks more about his pathetic dating life, how other people’s migraines interfere with his sex life, and asks why do birds love to shit on his car.  He even references Gulliver’s Travels.

In “Wait for the Punchline!” Langley complains about people interrupting his moments of comedic genius and ruining the punchline. Then, explains the basic structure of comedy, and tells a joke that’s more than just “meh.”

In “Tequila Mockingbird,” Langley shares a story of a buddy who recently got his heart broken. There’s also a sad love song and a parrot.

In “Short,” Langley discusses size issues, working in retail, and stupid people saying stupid things.  And there’s a song. #ShortLivesMatter

In “…Luxury,” Langley flashes back to his very first girlfriend and the startling and unexpected discovering her love for hot dogs in a luxury extended cab pickup truck.

In this bonus episode, “Happy Birthday, ‘Merica,” Langley self indulgently reflects on one of his own birthdays, but ultimately makes a point after much unnecessary B.S. and wishes you all a happy 4th.

In “Move It!,” Langley sings a song and complains about stupid drivers.

In “Paula Abdul,” Langley attempts a couple of foreign languages, and goes on a search for a very important memento of self discovery from his teenage years.

In “Ocupado!,” Langley gives his perspective on the use of public restrooms and those people who lack the mental capacity to understand what a locked door means.

In “Movie Etiquette,” Langley offers his three rules that everyone should abide by to observe proper Movie Theatre Etiquette. He also attempts to break the record for most times using the “F” word in under 6 minutes.