How We Got Here

On the final episode of the season we say farewell to Chris who reflects on the knowledge and connections gained from being a part of How We Got Here. He expresses hope about the next chapter of where his life of "Aging Gayfully" will take him. We also introduce season 3 co-host, Caregiving.com Associate Editor Sarah Trott. Christina and Sarah share their plans for the forthcoming season. This season of "How We Got Here" is sponsored by Anthem.

Heather Zoccali is the current founder and director of the No Barriers Caregiver Program. She is also a co-host for The Brutally Beautiful podcast. Heather has been on the giving and receiving end of care throughout her life. In this conversation with Chris and Christina, Heather talks about her personal health issues as well as her son Connor's life-changing accident and how he's doing now. She also reflects on forgiveness and self-compassion and shares how modeling this behavior in our own lives can help others do the same. Heather offers advice on how to let others know when we need them to listen to us. She explains what happens at a No Barriers retreat and the tools attendees gain to incorporate self-care and empowerment pracrices into their caregiving. This season of How We Got Here is sponsored by Anthem. The application and nomination deadline for all 2022 No Barriers Caregiver retreats is March 18.

Fumiko Chino, MD is a cancer researcher and Assistant Attending in Radiation Oncology at Memorial Sloan Kettering Cancer Center. She was also a caregiver for her husband Andrew Mark Ladd, PhD who died from cancer in 2007. Fumiko joins How We Got Here for a conversation about the many ways caregiving and loss shape and inspire us in our personal and professional lives. She talks about how caring for Andrew enriched her understanding of love and commitment. She also discusses the biggest challenge they faced — one that many families can relate to: the inability to keep up with the rising costs of medical care after a diagnosis (a phenomenon called financial toxicity). Fumiko explains how open conversations about care expenses can free us from the shame of not being able to afford care and make others more aware of our financial limitations. This season of How We Got Here is sponsored by Anthem.

Dr. Nii-Quartelai Quartey serves AARP's diverse membership, including over a million LGBTQ-plus members, as the organization's Senior Advisor and National LGBTQ Liaison. In his conversation with How We Got Here, Nii-Quartelai describes several of the childhood experiences that ignited his passion for advocacy work. He also shares some of the latest AARP research on LGBTQ caregivers and how to care for members of the LGBTQ community and explains why advancing longevity is a justice issue. Nii-Quartelai also discusses the forthcoming long-term care index from SAGE and the Human Rights Council and how it will help families find safe and accepting communities, becoming a long-distance caregiver for both his mother and brother during the pandemic, and the difference between equality and equity. Click here for LGBTQ information from AARP, and click here to access their resources for caregivers. This season of How We Got Here is sponsored by Anthem.

Robert Pardi is a life coach and former caregiver to his wife Desiree, who was a palliative care physician. On this episode of How We Got Here, Robert describes his experiences with caregiving, including being trusted to execute his wife's care wishes, and explains why a disease or diagnosis does not have to become your identity. He also talks about the unique nature of every caregiving experience and the importance of telling your story — while no two journeys are the same, there are pieces of every person's story that other's may benefit from. He also offers advice on how to talk to friends and family about caregiving and asking for help and reflects on the perspective to be gained from our impermanence. Learn more about Robert and his coaching services here. This season of How We Got Here is sponsored by Anthem.

Michael Hebb is the founder of EOL.Community and Death Over Dinner. On this episode of How We Got Here, Michael talks about how his father's Alzheimer's diagnosis, and the ways his family dealt with it, affected him as a child and helped shape his earliest memories of caregiving and grief. He also tells us about a life-changing experience he had as a patient that taught him surrender at a very young age. Michael explains why the the end of life is ripe with opportunity for healing and revealing our humanity and the beauty that comes from learning how our loved ones want to be remembered. He shares how his work is increasing death literacy and walks us through what happens at a Death Over Dinner event. Michael describes the steps you can take to make sure your care and end-of-life wishes are honored and why inner work is the most important work of all. Visit EOL.Community for resources on grief, end of life, and more. This season of How We Got Here is sponsored by Anthem.

Brenda Blais Nesbitt is a warrior mom from her daughter, Nikki, for whom she has cared for over 28 years. She is also the founder and president of Coaching for Caregivers Canada. Brenda has been both a patient and a caregiver and joins How We Got Here to reflect on the joys and challenges of caring for a medically-complex child through adulthood all while navigating a chronic condition of her own. Brenda shares some the people and moments that contributed to her defeat—and those that made her stronger by empowering her to speak up. She also talks about what self-care looks like for her and why advocacy and self-care often happen simultaneously for 24/7 caregivers. Brenda describes the losses parents of medically-complex children mourn and other normal caregiving thoughts they experience, like guilt and the fear. She also shares her hopes for her season of the Caring Conversations podcast and how you can help a caregiver in your life. Listen to Caring Conversations. Connect with Brenda at Coaching for Caregivers Canada. This season of How We Got Here is sponsored by Anthem.

Tina Tchen is a lifelong advocate for women and girls whose credits include working for the Obama White House through both terms and serving as the President and CEO of TIME'S UP Now and the TIME'S UP Foundation. Tina joins How We Got Here to discuss what's in the Biden Administration's Build Back Better plan and why now is a critical time to share our caregiving stories. Tina also shares the personal and professional experiences that ignited her passion for gender equality and caregiver advocacy. She defines some of the common terminology and acronyms surrounding caregiving policy and summarizes the trends happening with women in the workplace and caregiving as the pandemic began that led to the creation of the TIME'S UP Care Economy Business Council. Tina explains why investing in caregiving makes good economic sense and how a national paid leave policy and wage protections for professional caregivers could transform the way we think about and support the care industry. Find out how you can get involved with Care Can't Wait. This season of How We Got Here is sponsored by Anthem.

Michael Allio is the founder of The L4 Project. He also appeared on season 17 of the Bachelorette. In 2017, Michael's wife Laura was diagnosed with stage 2B triple negative breast cancer -- just seven months after welcoming their first and only son, James, to the world. On this episode of How We Got Here, Michael describes how he and Laura met and reflects on their life together before and after her diagnosis. He also talks about holding space for both hope and grief while caring for someone else and how caregivers are affected by toxic positivity. Michael and Chris discuss their decisions to share their experiences with caregiving and loss publicly. Michael explains how Laura's legacy lives on through The L4 Project and the ways his organization helps children living with cancer tell their stories. Find out how you can support The L4 Project. This season of How We Got Here is sponsored by Anthem.

Susie Singer Carter and Don Priess are close friends who have both been caregivers for family members diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease. On this episode of How We Got Here, Susie and Don talk about how they met and the real-life story that inspired the creation of their Oscar-qualified short film, My Mom and the Girl, starring Valerie Harper. They also discuss the harmful assumptions that are made about those living with Alzheimer's and recall some of the people they've met who have forever-changed the way they think about this disease -- for the better. Susie and Don share what they've learned about themselves through both their caregiving experiences and their podcast, Love Conquers Alz. Listen to Susie and Don's podcast, Love Conquers Alz. This season of How We Got Here is sponsored by Anthem.

In her early 30s, Jodi-Ann Burey had many plans for her life -- including buying a house and traveling the world with friends. These plans were forever-changed after doctors discovered a tumor in her spinal cord. Jodi-Ann joins How We Got Here to talk about the ways a cancer diagnosis shapes a person's identity and how her experience as a patient led her to create the Black Cancer podcast. She also shares her thoughts on the battle metaphors that are commonly used to describe the cancer and the reasons why children shouldn't be safeguarded from the realities of illness and caregiving. Learn more about the Black Cancer podcast. This season of How We Got Here is sponsored by Anthem.

Shane and Hannah Burcaw are relationship vloggers on a mission to change the way society understands disability. They join How We Got Here to talk about how they met and the reasons they began documenting their interabled relationship on Youtube. Shane and Hannah define ableism and share examples they've encountered over the years. Hannah reflects on learning Shane's care when they started dating, and they discuss the interplay of caregiving and intimacy in their relationship. Watch Squirmy and Grubs on Youtube. This season of How We Got Here is sponsored by Anthem.

Keen insights abound on this bonus episode of How We Got Here! Chris and Christina are joined by super producer Bill Odman for a retrospective on season one guests and themes. The group considers how perceptions about caregiving and work/life balance in the U.S. have changed over the past couple decades. The group talks about some of the guest conversations that have stuck with them, including the funny moments shared while discussing heavy subjects. Thank you to Anthem for their sponsorship of season 1.

BJ Miller, MD is a long-time hospice and palliative medicine physician and educator. He currently sees patients and families via telehealth through Mettle Health, a company he co-founded with the aim to provide personalized, holistic consultations for any patient or caregiver who needs help navigating all the issues that come with serious illness and disability. BJ joins How We Got Here to talk about about caring for his mother, who had polio and post-polio syndrome, while he was a child and what compelled him to become a doctor. He also explains the accident at 19 years old that led to the amputation of three of his limbs and how this accident shaped his identity and helped him develop curiosity toward anything unknown. He shares insight on owning your insecurities and gives advice on getting the most out of a healthcare experience as either a patient or caregiver. To learn more about Mettle Health, tap here. This season of How We Got Here is sponsored by Anthem.

Sarah Trott is the associate producer and director of social media for Ambient Skies. She also appeared on season 25 of The Bachelor. Although she didn't find love, the platform has enabled her to connect with young women navigating similar life challenges, specifically with ALS. Sarah joins How We Got Here to talk about her father's ALS diagnosis, self-identifying as a caregiver, and the unique decisions young people face after a loved one is diagnosed with a chronic or terminal condition. She also talks about what it was like temporarily leaving her job in broadcast journalism to help care for her father and how this experience led to the creation of her private Facebook group, Sarah's Caregiver Community. Sarah reflects on anticipatory grief and finding purpose through pain. Tap here to join Sarah's Caregiver Community, and email her at hello@fullfocusmanagement.com. Learn more about adding caregiving information to your LinkedIn profile. This season of How We Got Here is sponsored by Anthem.

Jay Newton-Small is the CEO and founder of MemoryWell, a national network of more than 700 writers who tell the life stories of seniors to help improve their care. On this episode of How We Got Here, Jay talks about her father's Alzheimer's diagnosis, the ways caregiving affected her mother's health, and how her perspective on caregiving changed once she became his primary caregiver. She explains the accommodations she made in order to keep her father safe in her home and the moment she realized she could no longer care for him on her own. Jay also discloses both the challenging and humorous moments caring for her dad and how the experience led to the creation of MemoryWell. She explains how storytelling can transform our outcomes-driven healthcare system and help us increase empathy for others. Chris and Jay reflect on practicing forgiveness in caregiving--both to oneself and to those on the receiving end of care. Tap here for more information on MemoryWell. This season of How We Got Here is sponsored by Anthem.

Aisha Adkins is the Constituency Organizer for Caring Across Generations and Co-Executive Director of Love Labor Project. She has provided care for her parents off and on since 2006 but officially became a caregiver when her mother was diagnosed with dementia in 2013. Aisha joins How We Got Here to talk about her first exposure to caregiving at the age of seven and how the desire to help others has got her where she is today in both her caregiving and professional life. She reflects on the moments of her caregiving journey that taught her how to ask for help and how to advocate for her parents in various care settings. Aisha and Chris talk about how racial and gender identity inform and affect caregiving experiences. Aisha, in describing on a close personal loss, reflects on expectations versus reality when it come to memorializing the ones we love on the anniversaries of their deaths. Tap here to register for Love Labor Project's virtual meet-ups for caregivers, which happen every other Saturday at 10am CT. This season of How We Got Here is sponsored by Anthem.

Amy Goyer is a caregiving expert and columnist at AARP. She is also the author of "Juggling Life, Work and Caregiving" and is a frequent guest on NBC's Today Show. Amy joins How We Got Here for a conversation about the meaningful overlaps between her career and caring for numerous people in her life including her grandparents and parents. She shares how the combination of these experiences led her to her current role at AARP. She also discusses the positive impact the perception of choice can have on a caregiving experience and offers tips for having difficult conversations as a family. Amy explains the reasons why caring for her parents led her to bankruptcy, despite the resources that were available to both her and her parents. Chris and Amy talk about some of the unpleasant tasks involved in caring for a loved one and how humor and laughter can be the best medicine in those situations. Click here to find caregiver resources from AARP. This season of How We Got Here is sponsored by Anthem.

Edo Banach is the President and CEO of the National Hospice and Palliative Care Organization (NHPCO). Edo joins How We Got Here for a conversation about hospice including its origins and why misconceptions about it persist. He also talks about where his passion for community-based support comes from and reflects on an end-of-life experience he was a part of that had a profound impact on his life. Edo, Chris, and Christina share what song they'd each like to hear at the end of their lives. Edo discusses three steps that can be taken to address gaps in hospice care delivery. Click here to learn more about NHPCO. This season of How We Got Here is sponsored by Anthem.

Shoshana Ungerleider, MD (Extremis, End Game) is a doctor, a film producer, and a medical expert on TV. She is also the founder of End Well, a non-profit that's influencing social change and public perception around a variety of topic areas, including the end of life. Shoshana joins How We Got Here to talk about how her experiences in medical school and early on in her medical career revealed to her the disconnect between patient wishes and the default care they receive through the end of life. She also explains how End Well got started and how their thought-provoking programming helps people initiate conversations about caregiving, grief, serious illness, death, and more with the ones they love. Shoshana reflects on her journey of becoming a film producer and shares the habits and practices that have helped her maintain her mental and physical health through the pandemic. Tap here to join End Well's Take 10 experience. This season of How We Got Here is sponsored by Anthem.

Richard Lui is an anchor and journalist at MSNBC/NBC News. He also produced an Academy Award-qualifying documentary feature film, Sky Blossom, which features the stories of students caring for their loved ones who served in the military. Richard joins How We Got Here to talk about his new book, "Enough About Me: The Unexpected Power of Selflessness." Richard shares his thoughts on today's selfish pandemic and harnessing gratitude to improve our relationships with one another. He reflects on how reporting on hate crimes and other racist acts has affected his feelings of grief and loss. Richard also talks about his experience as a long-distance caregiver through the pandemic. Visit RichardLui.com to learn how to get your copy of his book, "Enough About Me: The Unexpected Power of Selflessness." This season of How We Got Here is sponsored by Anthem.

Ken Stern is the founder and chair of the Longevity Project which he founded in collaboration with the Stanford Center on Longevity. He is the host of multiple podcasts, including "When I'm 64." Ken joins "How We Got Here" to talk about his personal connection to caregiving and how both When I'm 64 and the Longevity Project got started. He revisits his father's end-of-life experience and reflects on the emotions he still feels thinking about what could have been done differently. Ken also weighs in on the current administration's proposed plans for caregiver support and shares how the National Conversation on Caregiving initiative is raising visibility around the caregiving crisis in the U.S. This season of "How We Got Here" is sponsored by Anthem.

Alexandra Drane is a serial entrepreneur who is helping revolutionize health care. She is the co-founder and CEO of ARCHANGELS, a national movement to recognize and honor caregivers. Alexandra joins How We Got Here to talk about her brain tumor diagnosis on April Fool's Day in 2011. She talks about what it was like being on the receiving end of care and how important it is to thank someone for taking care of us. Reflecting on several challenging healthcare experiences, Alexandra offers advice on how to advocate for loved ones in these settings. She also shares how ARCHANGELS came about, her experience working as a cashier at Walmart, the financial burdens caregivers face, and how these worries have been affected by the pandemic. Learn more about Archangels. This season of How We Got Here is sponsored by Anthem.

Jessica Zitter, MD ("Extremis," Extreme Measures) is an ICU and palliative care physician, author, speaker and documentarian. Her latest film, "Caregiver: A Love Story", examines the rising public health crisis of family caregiver burden. Jessica joins How We Got Here to discuss her trajectory from medical school student to caregiver advocate. Jessica emphasizes the importance of advance care planning and talks about why it's so hard for us to talk about death. She also describes her grandmother--the first person in her life she realized was a caregiver. Jessica explains that the family caregiving experience was not the original topic she set out to explore with Caregiver: A Love Story and what compelled her to share that story instead. At the end of the episode, Jessica offers a special message of encouragement for family caregivers. Learn more about Caregiver: A Love Story This season of How We Got Here is sponsored by Anthem. Find out the value of your unpaid care work using Caregiving.com's caregiver salary calculator.

Whether we're in it or bearing witness to it, caregiving impacts everyone and profoundly shapes our purpose and identity. How We Got Here enriches our understanding of what it means to give and receive care by talking to people about the circumstances that introduced them to care and how these experiences changed them. How We Got Here, presented by Caregiving.com and the Whole Care Network, is hosted by Christopher MacLellan (“The Bow Tie Guy”), who cared for his partner Richard through the end of his life, and Christina Best, who helped her mother care for her father David through the end of his life. Christopher is the founder of the Whole Care Network, and Christina is the Editor-in-Chief of Caregiving.com. Please subscribe to How We Got Here from whatever platform you use to stream podcasts. Thank you! Follow us on... Twitter https://twitter.com/HowWeGotHerePod Facebook https://www.facebook.com/HowWeGotHerePod Instagram https://www.instagram.com/HWGHthepodcast/