The Real Weird Sisters: A Harry Potter Podcast

Alice and Martha close the book on Fleur, discussing her arc in the seventh book. Fleur may be 'ideous as one of the seven Potters, but don't worry - her beauty is noted in just about every other scene! And it doesn't seem like she minded spending Christmas with Ron and missing out on Celestina's warbling. Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

Hello, Father! Alice, Martha, and special guest Shut Up Tim are back to discuss JUNIOR'S race around the courtroom, Karkaroff's dramatics in the cage and the closet, and Dumbledore's pensive monologuing about the Pensieve. You may be surprised by the appearance of Filch on this podcast! Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

The characterfleur studies continue, as Alice and Martha discuss Phlegm in the fifth and sixth books. Ol' Fleur Delacour eemproves 'er Eenglish, 'Arry becomes a Fleur apologist, and Bill starts to enjoy his steaks extra rare. We will return with Part 3 to properly eulogize our favorite French character! Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

Alice and Martha return to character studies to discuss everyone's favorite French champion, Fleur Delacour! Hermione might not give her a fair shake, and Ollivander might scoff at her Veela hair wand, but Fleur has a lot of redeeming characteristics, too! At least she's not a leetle boy!Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

Three of Martha's most infamous characters, plus Harry and Ron convene on this week's page for some very goofy times in the Hospital Wing. Plus, find out what Mary GrandPre has been up to during quarantine! (Don't worry; it doesn't involve Twitter). Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

In the most somber OPAAT yet, Alice and Martha review recent bad news in the Wizarding World, which is affecting many of Harry's classmates, including Hannah Abbott, a round-faced Hufflepuff student, the Patil twins, and Lavender Brown. Luckily, Harry's memory is up to the task of remembering all the important details he need to successfully analyze his classmates' actions! Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

One Page at a Time returns to Prisoner of Azkaban, this time for a scene in which Sirius acts enormously strangely. Alice and Martha discuss cat, rat, and dog and scrounge for a bird too, of course! Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

Alice and Martha discuss page 231 of Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. Alice gets to practice long-form Jim Dale impressions, Barty Crouch Jr. gets to make some weird decisions as Moody, and Harry's at of defiance has the potential to become a pretty sick meme. Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

To discuss this amazing five minutes, Alice and Martha are joined by special guest Shut Up Tim! There's plenty of tongue wiggling, MVB contenders, and cringy Hagrid moments to break down this week! Harry even gets to enter a world which is entirely his own. And don't worry, the microwave minutes may be over, but there's a new segment in town! Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

Alice and Martha continue with their new show format - One Page at a Time! In this series, the sisters will focus on one randomly selected page from the series each week. This week's episode covers Order of the Phoenix, page 341, on which the D.A. is solidly "In the Hog's Head." Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

Alice and Martha premiere a new show format - One Page at a Time! In this series, the sisters will focus on one randomly selected page from the series each week. This week's episode covers Prisoner of Azkaban, page 119, on which the trio nerviously, anxiously, and gloomily reflects on Bucky's conflict with Malfoy. Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

It's time to close the seventh book on Remus John Lupin, husband of "Dora," who prefers to go by her surname only. Alice and Martha spend plenty of time making fun of dear old Lupin, but also properly eulogizing him for the wonderful teacher and person that he was. Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

Alice and Martha go through the tiramisu-like "layers" of Remus John Lupin's reactions and behaviors in the first half of Deathly Hallows. And even though it seemed like the Lupinversation would wrap up this week, the proper eulogy will happen next week! Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

In the third installment of the Lupinversation, Alice and Martha cover Lupin's arc in the fifth and sixth books. Lupin goes underground, comforts dear Tonks on the loss of her cousin (who she might've been a little in love with) and finds out the "truth" about Severus (Snape). Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

Alice and Martha take some time to remember their grandmother, Doris Krebill, who passed away earlier this month at age 99. Following a brief introduction is the Real Weird Grandma's interview from the 2019 Mother's Day special episode. Regular episodes will resume next week.

Alice and Martha resume the Lupinversation after just a little time off! It is he, Remus John Lupin in the fourth and fifth books, not yet husband of Nymphadora Tonks (who prefers to go by her surname only).  Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

Alice and Martha discuss another dynamic duo this week - Hepzibah Smith and Hokey the House Elf! Though he only gets to see them for one pensieve memory, Harry doesn't withhold his judgment of Hepzibah and Hokey tugs at his heartstrings enough to activate a newfound passion for Hermione's society, SPEW. Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

Alice and Martha start the Bobversation at the House of Gaunt and Coleminate at Tom Riddle's orphanage. This week's dynamic duo of characters is thick as thieves and incredibly stannable, or as Dumbledore might say, rich in detail and satisfyingly accurate. Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

It may be the end of Goblet of Fire's microwave minutes, but Mike Newell's magnum opus is far from over! There might not be much dialogue as Harry completes the Second Task, but Alice, Martha, and special guest Shut Up Tim still find plenty to nitpick, from ze grindylows to Hermione's sub-par impression of Fleur. Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

The Ronversation comes to a close as Alice and Martha discuss Ron's part in the battle of HogWARTS and his many full circle moments at the end of the seventh book.  Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

Welcome back to the 75th Ronversation and the first Dragomir Despardversation! This week, Alice and Martha discuss Ron's travels with Harry to Shell Cottage, Gringotts, and HogsMEADE. Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

Ron's back, and so is conversation about the Ronversation! This week's episode covers the time between Ron's return and the trio's "visit" to Malfoy Manor. Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

Remembered Ron, have you? Well, luckily, so have Alice and Martha as they return to the seventh book Ronversation for the first time in a few weeks. This episode spans from Ron's splinching to Ron's departure and finally, Ron's return. Ron may reach a low point this episode, but his classic one-liners reach a high point. Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

As 2024 comes to a close, we are back to celebrate the holiday season Potter-style. First, Alice and Martha are joined by special guest Shandy to cast A Christmas Carol with Wizarding World characters. Up second (00:32:26), the sisters Take Five on the Christmas classic Jingle All the Way, with special guest Shut Up Tim (@ShutUpTim). And finally (01:28:30), Alice and Martha rate Harry Potter themed gifts according to their own unique rubric! Thank you so much for listening to the show. We wish you a wonderful holiday season!If you enjoyed today's show, please consider supporting us on Patreon (www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters)!

Special guest Shut Up Tim is back to discuss the Second Task with Alice and Martha. Neville might have killed Harry Potter, but the "treasures" are the real victims in this five minutes! Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

Alice and Martha cover Ron's arc in the time the trio spends after leaving the Burrow up through their adventures at the Ministry. From hugely significant symbolism to whether or not Gamp's Law applies to clothes, the Ronversation continues to break new ground in Harry Potter discourse! Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

Alice and Martha begin Ronversing about Ron's arc in the seventh book, discussing events leading up to the trio's departure from the Burrow. Did Ron really not know if Harry had a tattoo? What exactly is a ghoul? All your most pressing questions will be answered! Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

Take a trip into the Pensieve and all the way down to Whoville this week! But is it the same Whoville as the Grinch visits? Find out all this and more, including who the podcast's resident sour kangaroo is.In this series, Alice and Martha reminisce on shared memories, inside jokes, and experiences reading both classic and lesser-known children's books, including favorite segments such as Quora Question of the Week, and Sorting Hat! Take Fives and character studies will continue, with this new episode format being added to the rotation with the other two formats. Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsistersNew episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

And just like that, the sixth book Ronversation comes to a close, as Alice and Martha discuss Ron's relationships with his family, Luna, and Hagrid, as well as the victims of his bullying (including poor Sir Nicholas!), and his role in the canonicly titled "Battle of the Astronomy Tower." Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

Alice and Martha continue the Ronversation, discussing Ron's plots with Quidditch and school as well as his relationships with Snape and Slughorn. There's a lot or rewinding, apparating, and confunding moments this week, and there's still another full episode of Ron in the sixth book before the sisters will begin the final eulogy on Ron. Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

Even thought last week's show would have been the perfect ending point for the show, Alice and Martha decide to return to finish eulogizing Ron his relationships with girls in the sixth book! Won-won may not make Madam Rosmerta laugh, but at least he's amazing with apparating and faking sleep in the Hospital Wing! Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

It's endless brat summer as Alice and Martha keep the Ronversation going, discussing Ron's relationships with girls in the sixth book. This podcast probably can't pass the Bechdel test, but we all know you can't get enough of it! Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

Alice and Martha move the Ronversation to book six Ron, starting with his relationship with brat Harry! Hopefully this episode will have you guffawing as much as the boys when Harry levicorpuses Ron! Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

Special guest Shut Up Tim joins Alice and Martha to break down the next five minutes of Goblet of Fire, in which Harry gets ogled by his forty-year-old twin, Moaning Myrtle. So, if you're anything like Tim, settle into a nice relaxing bath and spend the next hour and a half doused in this riveting discussion! Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

Alice and Martha conclude the fifth book Ronversation, but don't worry, there's still a good 6-8 episodes left to properly eulogize Ron! This week's discusison covers Ron's relationships with his family, Luna, and, most importantly, Sir Nicholas! Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

The Ronversation continues as Alice and Martha focus on Ron's relationship with Hermione in the fifth book. Even though they're always having a go at each other and driving Harry mad, Ron and Hermione might actually be more of a team than ever before.Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

Alice and Martha are once again joined by special guest Shut Up Tim to discuss another brilliant five minutes of Mike Newell's magnum opus! Hermione chastises the boys, Harry enters a REM cycle in record-breaking time, and Alfonso's influence helps move the film along. Viktor might not be particularly loquacious, but luckily for you, the sisters are! Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

Alice and Martha resume their Ronversation about Ron's relationships with two of his closest mates, Harry and Quidditch (talk about a cute name!). And even though it's a Ron character study, listen to find out just how little Ginny really is, and what Malfoy might have pursued as a career in another universe.Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

It's onto the fifth book and Alice and Martha may be *genuinely* entering their Ron stan era as they discuss his friendship with Harry! He might drive Harry mad with all his rowing with Hermione, but in the end, these two best mates will always come around for each other! Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

The fourth book Ronversation continues as Alice and Martha discuss Ron's relationships with many extremely important side characters. Pigwidgeon Xes madly, Fleur uses her veela charm, and Krum looks really grumpy every time the sisters rewind back to the Quidditch World Cup. Next week, it's onto the fifth book! Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

Alice and Martha continue Ronversing about Ron in the fourth book, this time focusing on his relationships with Hermione and his family. Between his disparaging attitude about SPEW and his disdain for "Vicky," it's pretty clear Ron knows what he's doing when it comes to impressing girls he cares about.Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

Find out who's a crazy elf, a carefree ogre, a unicorn, and a hairy troll as Alice and Martha are once again joined by special guest Shut Up Tim to recap the next five minutes of Goblet of Fire! Harry and Ron are the ultimate party poopers in this segment, the Patil twins find their acting groove, and Flitwick crowdsurfs, possibly against his will. Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

The Ronversation continues as Alice and Martha begin discussing Ron in the fourth book, starting with his relationship with Harry. From their biggest fight yet to the bulging bag of Dungbombs Ron gives Harry for Christmas, there are some high highs and low lows this book! Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

Alice and Martha finally resume the Ronversation, discussing Ron's plots in the third book! In this book, Ron gets a little taste of fame, his relationship with Scabbers takes several turns for the worst, and he proves that he might be more than just a little stitious. Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsistersNew episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

It may take nineteen minutes before getting to the meat of the show, but Alice, Martha, and special guest Shut Up Tim are so excited to talk about the next five minutes of Mike Newell's magnum opus! This week, twins start getting their own personalities (and looks), Cho stumbles over her words while accusing Harry of being a mumbler, and the OG MVB makes its appearance. AWKWARD!!Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

Alice and Martha talk through 100 great saves by Cormac McLaggen, even though it's not quite clear where he has actually played Quidditch before. McLaggen may not be Harry's favorite, but he's a great decoy date for Hermione and practically King Slug! Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsistersNew episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

Alice, Martha, and special guest Shut Up Tim discuss the fourteenth five minutes of Mike Newell's classic masterpiece. There's plenty to talk about this week, including twinspeak (times two), alliterations, dancing lessons, and the return of the OG MVB Nigel! And by the way, who's Pinch??Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

Alice and Martha take a break from stories about mice to cover a story about a dog, Because of Winn-Dixie by Kate DiCamillo. Is Miss Franny Block really a librarian? Where do Litmus Lozenges get their flavor? And did Dave Matthews kill his chances at an acting career with his portrayal of Otis? Find out the answers to these questions and more! In this series, Alice and Martha reminisce on shared memories, inside jokes, and experiences reading both classic and lesser-known children's books, including favorite segments such as Quora Question of the Week, and Sorting Hat! Take Fives and character studies will continue, with this new episode format being added to the rotation with the other two formats. Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsistersNew episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

It's time to propery eulogize our favorite Slytherin head of house! Alice and Martha discuss Harry's successful procurement of the memory and Slughorn's impressive seventh book arc. “To friendship! To generosity! To ten Galleons a hair!”Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsistersNew episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

Alice and Martha continue their discussion about ol' Sluggy, who throws an amazing and not at all problematic Christmas party. Harry makes a valiant atttempt to get the memory from him (although the tampered memory was very convincing!). Finally, when in doubt, just shove a bezoar down their throats! Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsistersNew episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!

Two full minutes of a joyride / dragon chase around the Hogwarts grounds, how thrilling! Harry nearly DIES, but luckily lives to revel in the glory of amping up the Gryffindor Common Room crowd. Meanwhile, Alice, Martha, and special guest Shut Up Tim compete to see who can tell the most compelling Microwave Minute story. Please consider supporting us on Patreon! www.patreon.com/realweirdsisters New episodes are released every Monday and special topics shows are released periodically. Don't forget to subscribe to our show to make sure you never miss an episode!