Podcasts about Secret Santa

What do Kringlefest, a town-wide Secret Santa, and a letter that was never received have in common?We're back to recap and review another fan favorite from the Hallmark vault and we've got another special guest! This time, Cousin Chad from the Christmas Cousins Podcast joins us to gab about one of his all time favorites, Hallmark's 'Small Town Christmas'!Will we agree it's worth the watch? Check out our 'Gold or Coal' segment to find out! And -- of course -- we want to hear from you. Let us know in the comments what you thought about this one, and connect with us on our social media channels for everything to get you good to go for the upcoming 'Countdown to Christmas' season! We're online at www.DoYouWatchWhatIWatch.com!And -- as always -- may your days be merry and bright!

Had the pleasure of speaking with former WWE and WCW star Jimmy Yang! On episode 232, we discussed his childhood, getting into wrestling, training, how the Jimmy Wang Yang character came about, participating in Secret Santa events, his new book Yun's Time, and more. Get a copy of Jimmy's new book here: https://www.jazzyyang.com/products/james-yun-yun-s-time Are you a pro wrestler and have done community service and/or charity work? E-mail the podcast at wrestlingwithheart@yahoo.com and tell us if you would be interested in being interviewed. Follow us on:Facebook: Wrestling with Heart with Stanley Karr Bluesky: @wrestlingwithheart.bsky.social Instagram: @wrestlingwithheart Threads: @wrestlingwithheart Hear Wrestling with Heart on Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast... Hear Wrestling with Heart on Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/46cviL5... Hear Wrestling with Heart on iHeartRadio: https://www.iheart.com/podcast/269-wr... Donate to my Patreon and subscribe to my content here: https://www.patreon.com/user?u=84502525 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On this episode, my guest is Stephen Jenkinson, culture activist and ceremonialist advocating a handmade life and eloquence. He is an author, a storyteller, a musician, sculptor and off-grid organic farmer. Stephen is the founder/ principal instructor of the Orphan Wisdom School in Canada, co-founded with his wife Nathalie Roy in 2010. Also a sought-after workshop leader, articulating matters of the heart, human suffering, confusions through ceremony.He is the author of several influential books, including Money and the Soul's Desires, Die Wise: A Manifesto for Sanity and Soul (2015), Come of Age: The Case for Elderhood in a Time of Trouble (2018), A Generation's Worth: Spirit Work While the Crisis Reigns (2021), and Reckoning (2022), co-written with Kimberly Ann Johnson. His most recent book, Matrimony: Ritual, Culture, and the Heart's Work, was released in August 2025. He is also involved in the musical project Nights of Grief & Mystery with singer-songwriter Gregory Hoskins, which has toured across North America, Europe, Australia, and New Zealand.Show Notes:* The Bone House of the Orphan Wisdom Enterprise* Matrimony: Ritual, Culture and the Heart's Work* The Wedding Industry* Romantic Sameness and Psychic Withering* The Two Tribes* The Roots of Hospitality* The Pompous Ending of Hospitality* Debt, And the Estrangement of the Stranger* More Than Human Hospitality* The Alchemy of the Orphan Wisdom SchoolHomework:Matrimony: Ritual, Culture, and the Heart's Work | PurchaseOrphan WisdomThe Scriptorium: Echoes of an Orphan WisdomTranscription:Chris: This is an interview that I've been wondering about for a long time in part, because Stephen was the first person I ever interviewed for the End of Tourism Podcast. In Oaxaca, Mexico, where I live Stephen and Natalie were visiting and were incredibly, incredibly generous. Stephen, in offering his voice as a way to raise up my questions to a level that deserve to be contended with.We spoke for about two and a half hours, if I remember correctly. And there was a lot in what you spoke to towards the second half of the interview that I think we're the first kind of iterations of the Matrimony book.We spoke a little bit about the stranger and trade, and it was kind of startling as someone trying to offer their first interview and suddenly hearing something [00:01:00] that I'd never heard before from Stephen. Right. And so it was quite impressive. And I'm grateful to be here now with y'all and to get to wonder about this a little more deeply with you Stephen.Stephen: Mm-hmm. Hmm.Chris: This is also a special occasion for the fact that for the first time in the history of the podcast, we have a live audience among us today. Strange doings. Some scholars and some stewards and caretakers of the Orphan Wisdom enterprise. So, thank you all as well for coming tonight and being willing to listen and put your ears to this.And so to begin, Stephen, I'm wondering if you'd be willing to let those who will be listening to this recording later on know where we're gathered in tonight?Stephen: Well, we're in... what's the name of this township?Nathalie: North Algona.Stephen: North Algona township on the borders, an eastern gate [00:02:00] of Algonquin Park. Strangely named place, given the fact that they were the first casualties of the park being established. And we're in a place that never should have been cleared - my farm. It should never have been cleared of the talls, the white pines that were here, but the admiralty was in need back in the day. And that's what happened there. And we're in a place that the Irish immigrants who came here after the famine called "Tramore," which more or less means "good-frigging luck farming."It doesn't technically mean that, but it absolutely means that. It actually means "sandy shore," which about covers the joint, and it's the only thing that covers the joint - would be sand. You have to import clay. Now, that's a joke in many farming places in the world, but if we wanted any clay, we'd have to bring it in and pay for the privilege.And the farm has been in [00:03:00] my, my responsibility for about 25 years now, pretty close to that. And the sheep, or those of them left because the coyotes have been around for the first time in their casualty-making way... They're just out here, I'm facing the field where they're milling around.And it's the very, very beginnings of the long cooling into cold, into frigid, which is our lot in this northern part of the hemisphere, even though it's still August, but it's clear that things have changed. And then, we're on a top of a little hill, which was the first place that I think that we may have convened a School here.It was a tipi, which is really worked very well considering we didn't live here, so we could put it up and put it down in the same weekend. [00:04:00] And right on this very hill, we were, in the early days, and we've replaced that tipi with another kind of wooden structure. A lot more wood in this one.This has been known as "The Teaching Hall" or "The Great Hall," or "The Hall" or "The Money Pit, as it was known for a little while, but it actually worked out pretty well. And it was I mean, people who've come from Scandinavia are knocked out by the kind of old-style, old-world visitation that the place seems to be to them.And I'd never really been before I had the idea what this should look like, but I just went from a kind of ancestral memory that was knocking about, which is a little different than your preferences, you know. You have different kinds of preferences you pass through stylistically through your life, but the ones that lay claim to you are the ones that are not interested in your [00:05:00] preferences. They're interested in your kind of inheritance and your lineage.So I'm more or less from the northern climes of Northern Europe, and so the place looks that way and I was lucky enough to still have my carving tools from the old days. And I've carved most of the beams and most of the posts that keep the place upright with a sort of sequence of beasts and dragons and ne'er-do-wells and very, very few humans, I think two, maybe, in the whole joint. Something like that. And then, mostly what festoons a deeply running human life is depicted here. And there's all kinds of stories, which I've never really sat down and spoken to at great length with anybody, but they're here.And I do deeply favour the idea that one day [00:06:00] somebody will stumble into this field, and I suppose, upon the remains of where we sit right now, and wonder "What the hell got into somebody?" That they made this mountain of timber moldering away, and that for a while what must have been, and when they finally find the footprint of, you know, its original dimensions and sort of do the wild math and what must have been going on in this sandy field, a million miles in away from its home.And wherever I am at that time, I'll be wondering the same thing.Audience: Hmm.Stephen: "What went on there?" Even though I was here for almost all of it. So, this was the home of the Orphan Wisdom School for more than a decade and still is the home of the Orphan Wisdom School, even if it's in advance, or in retreat [00:07:00] or in its doldrums. We'll see.And many things besides, we've had weddings in here, which is wherein I discovered "old-order matrimony," as I've come to call it, was having its way with me in the same way that the design of the place did. And it's also a grainery for our storage of corn. Keep it up off the ground and out of the hands of the varmints, you know, for a while.Well that's the beginning.Chris: Hmm. Hmm. Thank you Stephen.Stephen: Mm-hmm.Chris: You were mentioning the tipi where the school began. I remember sleeping in there the first time I came here. Never would I have thought for a million years that I'd be sitting here with you.Stephen: It's wild, isn't it?Chris: 12 years later.?: Yeah.Chris: And so next, I'd like to do my best in part over the course of the next perhaps hour or two to congratulate you on the release of [00:08:00] your new book, Matrimony: Ritual, Culture, and the Heart's Work.Stephen: Thank you.Chris: Mm-hmm. I'm grateful to say like many others that I've received a copy and have lent my eyes to your good words, and what is really an incredible achievement.For those who haven't had a chance to lay their eyes on it just yet, I'm wondering if you could let us in on why you wrote a book about matrimony in our time and where it stands a week out from its publication.Stephen: Well, maybe the answer begins with the question, "why did you write a book, having done so before?" And you would imagine that the stuff that goes into writing a book, you'd think that the author has hopes for some kind of redemptive, redeeming outcome, some kind of superlative that drops out the back end of the enterprise.And you know, this is [00:09:00] the seventh I've written. And I would have to say that's not really how it goes, and you don't really know what becomes of what you've written, even with the kind people who do respond, and the odd non-monetary prize that comes your way, which Die Wise gamed that.But I suppose, I wrote, at all partly to see what was there. You know, I had done these weddings and I was a little bit loathe to let go, to let the weddings turn entirely into something historical, something that was past, even though I probably sensed pretty clearly that I was at the end of my willingness to subject myself to the slings and arrows that came along with the enterprise, but it's a sweet sorrow, or there's a [00:10:00] wonder that goes along with the tangle of it all. And so, I wrote to find out what happened, as strange as that might sound to you. You can say, "well, you were there, you kind of knew what happened." But yes, I was witness to the thing, but there's the act of writing a book gives you the opportunity to sort of wonder in three-dimensions and well, the other thing I should say is I was naive and figured that the outfit who had published the, more or less prior two books to this one, would kind of inevitably be drawn to the fact that same guy. Basically, same voice, new articulation. And I was dumbfounded to find out that they weren't. And so, it's sort of smarted, you know?And I think what I did was I just set the whole [00:11:00] enterprise aside, partly to contend with the the depths of the disappointment in that regard, and also not wanting to get into the terrible fray of having to parse or paraphrase the book in some kind of elevator pitch-style to see if anybody else wanted to look at it. You know, such as my touchy sense of nobility sometimes, you know, that I just rather not be involved in the snarl of the marketplace any longer.So, I withdrew and I just set it aside but it wasn't that content to be set, set aside. And you know, to the book's credit, it bothered me every once in a while. It wasn't a book at the point where I was actually trying to engineer it, you know, and, and give it some kind of structure. I had piles of paper on the floor representing the allegation of chapters, trying to figure out what the relationship was [00:12:00] between any of these things.What conceivably should come before what. What the names of any of these things might be. Did they have an identity? Was I just imposing it? And all of that stuff I was going through at the same time as I was contending with a kind of reversal in fortune, personally. And so in part, it was a bit of a life raft to give me something to work on that I wouldn't have to research or dig around in the backyard for it and give me some sort of self-administered occupation for a while.Finally, I think there's a parallel with the Die Wise book, in that when it came to Die Wise, I came up with what I came up with largely because, in their absolute darkest, most unpromising hours, an awful lot of dying people, all of whom are dead now, [00:13:00] let me in on some sort of breach in the, the house of their lives.And I did feel that I had some obligation to them long-term, and that part of that obligation turned into writing Die Wise and touring and talking about that stuff for years and years, and making a real fuss as if I'd met them all, as if what happened is really true. Not just factually accurate, but deeply, abidingly, mandatorily true.So, although it may be the situation doesn't sound as extreme, but the truth is, when a number of younger - than me - people came to me and asked me to do their weddings, I, over the kind of medium-term thereafter, felt a not dissimilar obligation that the events that ensued from all of that not [00:14:00] be entrusted entirely to those relatively few people who attended. You know, you can call them "an audience," although I hope I changed that. Or you could call them "witnesses," which I hope I made them that.And see to it that there could be, not the authorized or official version of what happened, but to the view from here, so to speak, which is, as I sit where I am in the hall right now, I can look at the spot where I conducted much of this when I wasn't sacheting up and down the middle aisle where the trestle tables now are.And I wanted to give a kind of concerted voice to that enterprise. And I say "concerted voice" to give you a feel for the fact that I don't think this is a really an artifact. It's not a record. It's a exhortation that employs the things that happened to suggest that even though it is the way it is [00:15:00] ritually, impoverished as it is in our time and place, it has been otherwise within recoverable time and history. It has.And if that's true, and it is, then it seems to me at least is true that it could be otherwise again. And so, I made a fuss and I made a case based on that conviction.There's probably other reasons I can't think of right now. Oh, being not 25 anymore, and not having that many more books in me, the kind of wear and tear on your psyche of imposing order on the ramble, which is your recollection, which has only so many visitations available in it. Right? You can only do that so many times, I think. And I'm not a born writing person, you know, I come to it maniacally when I [00:16:00] do, and then when it's done, I don't linger over it so much.So then, when it's time to talk about it, I actually have to have a look, because the act of writing it is not the act of reading it. The act of writing is a huge delivery and deliverance at the same time. It's a huge gestation. And you can't do that to yourself, you know, over and over again, but you can take some chances, and look the thing in the eye. So, and I think some people who are there, they're kind of well-intended amongst them, will recognize themselves in the details of the book, beyond "this is what happened and so on." You know, they'll recognize themselves in the advocacy that's there, and the exhortations that are there, and the [00:17:00] case-making that I made and, and probably the praying because there's a good degree of prayerfulness in there, too.That's why.Chris: Thank you. bless this new one in the world. And what's the sense for you?Stephen: Oh, yes.Chris: It being a one-week old newborn. How's that landing in your days?Stephen: Well, it's still damp, you know. It's still squeaky, squeaky and damp. It's walking around like a newborn primate, you know, kind of swaying in the breeze and listening to port or to starboard according to whatever's going on.I don't know that it's so very self-conscious in the best sense of that term, yet. Even though I recorded the audio version, I don't think [00:18:00] it's my voice is found every nook and cranny at this point, yet. So, it's kind of new. It's not "news," but it is new to me, you know, and it's very early in terms of anybody responding to it.I mean, nobody around me has really taken me aside and say, "look, now I want to tell you about this book you wrote." It hasn't happened, and we'll see if it does, but I've done a few events on the other side of the ocean and hear so far, very few, maybe handful of interviews. And those are wonderful opportunities to hear something of what you came up with mismanaged by others, you know, misapprehend, you could say by others.No problem. I mean, it's absolutely no problem. And if you don't want that to happen, don't talk, don't write anything down. So, I don't mind a bit, you know, and the chances are very good that it'll turn into things I didn't have in mind [00:19:00] as people take it up, and regard their own weddings and marriages and plans and schemes and fears and, you know, family mishigas and all the rest of it through this particular lens, you know. They may pick up a pen or a computer (it's an odd expression, "pick up a computer"), and be in touch with me and let me know. "Yeah, that was, we tried it" or whatever they're going to do, because, I mean, maybe Die Wise provided a bit of an inkling of how one might be able to proceed otherwise in their dying time or in their families or their loved ones dying time.This is the book that most readily lends itself to people translating into something they could actually do, without a huge kind of psychic revolution or revolt stirring in them, at least not initially. This is as close as I come, probably, to writing a sequence of things [00:20:00] that could be considered "add-ons" to what people are already thinking about, that I don't force everybody else outta the house in order to make room for the ideas that are in the book. That may happen, anyway, but it wasn't really the intent. The intent was to say, you know, we are in those days when we're insanely preoccupied with the notion of a special event. We are on the receiving end of a considerable number of shards showing up without any notion really about what these shards remember or are memories of. And that's the principle contention I think that runs down the spine of the book, is that when we undertake matrimony, however indelicately, however by rote, you know, however mindlessly we may do it, [00:21:00] inadvertently, we call upon those shards nonetheless.And they're pretty unspectacular if you don't think about them very deeply, like the rice or confetti, like the aisle, like the procession up the aisle, like the giving away of someone, like the seating arrangement, like the spectacle seating arrangement rather than the ritual seating arrangement.And I mean, there's a fistful of them. And they're around and scholars aside maybe, nobody knows why they do them. Everybody just knows, "this is what a wedding is," but nobody knows why. And because nobody knows why, nobody really seems to know what a wedding is for, although they do proceed like they would know a wedding if they saw one. So, I make this a question to be really wondered about, and the shards are a way in. They're the kind of [00:22:00] breadcrumb trail through the forest. They're the little bits of broken something, which if you begin to handle just three or four of them, and kind of fit them together, and find something of the original shape and inflection of the original vessel, kind of enunciates, begins to murmur in your hands, and from it you can begin to infer some three-dimensionality to the original shape. And from the sense of the shape, you get a set sense of contour, and from the sense of contour, you get a sense of scale or size. And from that you get a sense of purpose, or function, or design. And from that you get a sense of some kind of serious magisterial insight into some of the fundament of human being that was manifest in the "old-order matrimony," [00:23:00] as I came to call it.So, who wouldn't wanna read that book?Chris: Mm-hmm.Thank you. Mm-hmm. Thank you, Stephen. Yeah. It reminds me, just before coming up here, maybe two weeks ago, I was in attending a wedding. And there was a host or mc, and initially just given what I was hearing over the microphone, it was hard to tell if he was hired or family or friends. And it turned out he was, in fact, a friend of the groom. And throughout the night he proceeded to take up that role as a kind of comedian.Audience: Mm-hmm.Chris: This was the idea, I guess. Mm-hmm. And he was buzzing and mumbling and swearing into the microphone, [00:24:00] and then finally minimizing the only remnant of traditional culture that showed up in the wedding. And his thing was, okay, so when can we get to the part where it's boom, boom, boom, right. And shot, shot, shot, whatever.Stephen: Right.Chris: There was so much that came up in my memories in part because I worked about a decade in Toronto in the wedding industry.Mm-hmm. Hospitality industry. Maybe a contradiction in terms, there. And there was one moment that really kind of summed it up. I kept coming back to this reading the book because it was everything that you wrote seemed to not only antithetical to this moment, but also an antidote.Anyways, it was in North Toronto and the [00:25:00] owner of the venue - it was a kind of movie theatre turned event venue - and there was a couple who was eventually going to get married there. They came in to do their tasting menu to see what they wanted to put on the menu for the dinner, for their wedding.And the owner was kind of this mafioso type. And he comes in and he sees them and he walks over and he says, "so, you're gonna get married at my wedding factory."Audience: Mm-hmm.Chris: In all sincerity.Stephen: Mm-hmm.Chris: Right.Without skipping a beat. Could you imagine?Stephen: Yeah.I could. I sure could.Chris: Yeah. Yeah.Stephen: I mean, don't forget, if these people weren't doing what the people wanted, they'd be outta business.Audience: Mm-hmm.Stephen: No, that's the thing. This is aiding and abetting. This is sleeping with the enemy, stylistically-speaking. [00:26:00] The fact that people "settle" (that's the term I would use for it), settle for this, the idea being that this somehow constitutes the most honest and authentic through line available to us is just jaw dropping. When you consider what allegedly this thing is supposed to be for. I mean, maybe we'll get into this, but I'll just leave this as a question for now. What is that moment allegedly doing?Not, what are the people in it allegedly doing? The moment itself, what is it? How is it different from us sitting here now talking about it? And how is it different from the gory frigging jet-fuelled aftermath of excess. And how's it different from the cursing alleged master of ceremonies? How can you [00:27:00] tell none of those things belong to this thing?And why do you have such a hard time imagining what doesAudience: Hmm mmChris: Well that leads me to my next question.Stephen: Ah, you're welcome.Chris: So, I've pulled a number of quotes from the book to read from over the course of the interview. And this one for anyone who's listening is on page 150. And you write Stephen,"Spiritually-speaking, most of the weddings in our corner of the world are endogamous affairs, inward-looking. What is, to me, most unnerving is that they can be spiritually-incestuous. The withering of psychic difference between people is the program of globalization. It is in the architecture of most things partaking of the internet, and it is in the homogeneity of our matrimony. [00:28:00] It is this very incestuous that matrimony was once crafted and entered into to avoid and subvert. Now, it grinds upon our differences until they are details.And so, this paragraph reminded me of a time in my youth when I seemed to be meeting couples who very eerily looked like each other. No blood or extended kin relation whatsoever, and yet they had very similar faces. And so as I get older, this kind of face fidelity aside, I continue to notice that people looking for companionship tend to base their search on similitude, on shared interests, customs, experiences, shared anything and everything. This, specifically, in opposition to those on the other side of the aisle or spectrum, to difference or divergence. And so, opposites don't attract anymore. I'm curious what you think this psychic [00:29:00] withering does to an achieve understanding of matrimony.Stephen: Well, I mean, let's wonder what it does to us, generally, first before we get to matrimony, let's say. It demonizes. Maybe that's too strong, but it certainly reconstitutes difference as some kind of affliction, some kind of not quite good enough, some kind of something that has to be overcome or overwhelmed on the road to, to what? On the road to sameness? So, if that's the goal, then are all of the differences between us, aberrations of some kind, if that's the goal? If that's the goal, are all the [00:30:00] differences between us, not God-given, but humanly misconstrued or worse? Humanly wrought? Do the differences between us conceivably then belong at all? Or is the principle object of the entire endeavor to marry yourself, trying to put up with the vague differences that the other person represents to you?I mean, I not very jokingly said years ago, that I coined a phrase that went something like "the compromise of infinity, which is other people." What does that mean? "The compromise of infinity, which is other people." Not to mention it's a pretty nice T-shirt. But what I meant by the [00:31:00] phrase is this: when you demonize difference in this fashion or when you go the other direction and lionize sameness, then one of the things that happens is that compromise becomes demonized, too. Compromise, by definition, is something you never should have done, right? Compromise is how much you surrender of yourself in order to get by. That's what all these things become. And before you know it, you're just beaten about the head and shoulders about "codependence" and you know, not being "true to yourself" as if being true to yourself is some kind of magic.I mean, the notion that "yourself is the best part of you" is just hilarious. I mean, when you think about it, like who's running amuck if yourself is what you're supposed to be? I ask you. Like, who's [00:32:00] doing the harm? Who's going mental if the self is such a good idea? So, of course, I'm maintaining here that I'm not persuaded that there is such a thing.I think it's a momentary lapse in judgment to have a self and to stick to it. That's the point I'm really making to kind of reify it until it turns ossified and dusty and bizarrely adamant like that estranged relative that lives in the basement of your house. Bizarrely, foreignly adamant, right? Like the house guest who just won't f**k off kind of thing.Okay, so "to thine own self be true," is it? Well, try being true to somebody else's self for ten minutes. Try that. [00:33:00] That's good at exercise for matrimony - being true to somebody else's self. You'll discover that their selves are not made in heaven, either. Either. I underscore it - either. I've completely lost track of the question you asked me.Chris: What are the consequences of the sameness on this anti-cultural sameness, and the program of it for an achieved understanding of matrimony.Stephen: Thank you. Well, I will fess up right now. I do so in the book. That's a terrible phrase. I swear I'd never say such a thing. "In my book... I say the following," but in this case, it's true. I did say this. I realized during the writing of it that I had made a tremendous tactical error in the convening of the event as I did it over the years, [00:34:00] and this is what it came to.I was very persuaded at the time of the story that appears in the chapter called "Salt and Indigo" in the book. I was very, very persuaded. I mean, listen, I made up the story (for what it's worth), okay, but I didn't make it up out of nothing. I made it up out of a kind of tribal memory that wouldn't quite let go.And in it, I was basically saying, here's these two tribes known principally for what they trade in and what they love most emphatically. They turn out to be the same thing. And I describe a circumstance in which they exchange things in a trade scenario, not a commerce scenario. And I'm using the chapter basically to make the case that matrimony's architecture derives in large measure from the sacraments of trade as manifest in that story. [00:35:00] Okay. And this is gonna sound obvious, but the fundamental requirement of the whole conceit that I came up with is that there are two tribes. Well, I thought to myself, "of course, there's always two tribes" at the time. And the two tribe-ness is reflected in when you come to the wedding site, you're typically asked (I hope you're still asked) " Are you family or friend of the groom or friend of the bride?" And you're seated "accordingly," right? That's the nominal, vestigial shard of this old tribal affiliation, that people came from over the rise, basically unknown to each other, to arrive at the kind of no man's land of matrimony, and proceeded accordingly. So, I put these things into motion in this very room and I sat people accordingly facing each other, not facing the alleged front of the room. [00:36:00] And of course, man, nobody knew where to look, because you raised your eyes and s**t. There's just humans across from you, just scads of them who you don't freaking know. And there's something about doing that to North Americas that just throws them. So, they're just looking at each other and then looking away, and looking at each other and looking away, and wondering what they're doing here and what it's for. And I'm going back and forth for three hours, orienting them as to what is is coming.Okay, so what's the miscalculation that I make? The miscalculation I made was assuming that by virtue of the seating arrangement, by virtue of me reminding them of the salt and indigo times, by virtue of the fact that they had a kind of allegiance of some sort or another to the people who are, for the moment, betrothed, that those distinctions and those affiliations together would congeal them, and constitute a [00:37:00] kind of tribal affiliation that they would intuitively be drawn towards as you would be drawn to heat on a cold winter's night.Only to discover, as I put the thing into motion that I was completely wrong about everything I just told you about. The nature of my error was this, virtually all of those people on one side of the room were fundamentally of the same tribe as the people on the other side of the room, apropos of your question, you see. They were card carrying members of the gray dominant culture of North America. Wow. The bleached, kind of amorphous, kind of rootless, ancestor-free... even regardless of whether their people came over in the last generation from the alleged old country. It doesn't really claim them.[00:38:00]There were two tribes, but I was wrong about who they were. That was one tribe. Virtually everybody sitting in the room was one tribe.So, who's the other tribe? Answer is: me and the four or five people who were in on the structural delivery of this endeavour with me. We were the other tribe.We didn't stand a chance, you see?And I didn't pick up on that, and I didn't cast it accordingly and employ that, instead. I employed the conceit that I insisted was manifest and mobilized in the thing, instead of the manifest dilemma, which is that everybody who came knew what a wedding was, and me and four or five other people were yet to know if this could be one. That was the tribal difference, if you [00:39:00] will.So, it was kind of invisible, wasn't it? Even to me at the time. Or, I say, maybe especially to me at the time. And so, things often went the way they went, which was for however much fascination and willingness to consider that there might have been in the room, there was quite a bit more either flat affect and kind of lack of real fascination, or curiosity, or sometimes downright hostility and pushback. Yeah.So, all of that comes from the fact that I didn't credit as thoroughly as I should have done, the persistence in Anglo-North America of a kind of generic sameness that turned out to be what most people came here ancestrally to become. "Starting again" is recipe for culture [00:40:00] loss of a catastrophic order. The fantasy of starting again. Right?And we've talked about that in your podcast, and you and I have talked about it privately, apropos of your own family and everybody's sitting in this room knows what I'm talking about. And when does this show up? Does it show up, oh, when you're walking down the street? Does it show up when you're on the mountaintop? Does it show up in your peak experiences? And the answer is "maybe." It probably shows up most emphatically in those times when you have a feeling that something special is supposed to be so, and all you can get from the "supposed to" is the allegation of specialness.Audience: Mm-hmm.Stephen: And then, you look around in the context of matrimony and you see a kind of febral, kind of strained, the famous bridezilla stuff, all of that stuff. [00:41:00] You saw it in the hospitality industry, no doubt. You know, the kind of mania for perfection, as if perfection constitutes culture. Right? With every detail checked off in the checkbox, that's culture. You know, as if everything goes off without a hitch and there's no guffaws. And in fact, anybody could reasonably make the case, "Where do you think culture appears when the script finally goes f*****g sideways?" That's when. And when you find out what you're capable of, ceremonially.And generally speaking, I think most people discovered that their ceremonial illiteracy bordered on the bottomless.That's when you find out. Hmm.Chris: Wow.Stephen: Yeah. And that's why people, you know, in speech time, they reach in there and get that piece of paper, and just look at it. Mm-hmm. They don't even look up, terrified that they're gonna go off script for a minute as [00:42:00] if the Gods of Matrimony are a scripted proposition.Chris: Mm-hmm. Yeah. Thank you for sharing that with us, that degree of deep reflection and humility that I'm sure comes with it.Stephen: Mea Culpa, baby. Yeah, I was, I got that one totally wrong. Mm-hmm. And I didn't know it at the time. Meanwhile, like, how much can you transgress and have the consequences of doing so like spill out across the floor like a broken thermometer's mercury and not wise up.But of course, I was as driven as anybody. I was as driven to see if I could come through with what I promised to do the year before. And keeping your promise can make you into a maniac.Audience: Hmm hmm.Chris: But I imagine that, you [00:43:00] know, you wouldn't have been able to see that even years later if you didn't say yes in the first place.Stephen: Oh, yeah. Yeah. And I wouldn't have been able to make the errors.Chris: Right.Stephen: Right. Yeah. I mean, as errors go, this is not a mortal sin. Right, right. And you could chalk it up to being a legitimate miscalculation. Well, so? All I'm saying is, it turns out I was there too, and it turns out, even though I was allegedly the circus master of the enterprise, I wasn't free and clear of the things we were all contending with, the kind of mortality and sort of cultural ricketiness that were all heirs to. That's how I translated it, as it turns out.So, PS there was a moment, [00:44:00] which I don't remember which setting it was now, but there was a moment when the "maybe we'll see if she becomes a bride" bride's mother slid up to me during the course of the proceedings, and in a kind of stage whisper more or less hissed me as follows."Is this a real wedding?"I mean, that's not a question. Not in that setting, obviously not. That is an accusation. Right. And a withering one at that. And there was a tremendous amount of throw-down involved.So, was it? I mean, what we do know is that she did not go to any of the weddings [00:45:00] that she was thinking of at the time, and go to the front of the room where the celebrant is austerely standing there with the book, or the script, or the well-intentioned, or the self-penned vows and never hissed at him or her, "is this a real wedding?"Never once did she do that. We know that.Right.And I think we know why. But she was fairly persuaded she knew what a real wedding was. And all she was really persuaded by was the poverty of the weddings that she'd attended before that one. Well, I was as informed in that respect as she was, wasn't I? I just probably hadn't gone to as many reprobate weddings as she had, so she had more to deal with than I did, even though I was in the position of the line of fire.And I didn't respond too well to the question, I have to say. At the moment, I was rather combative. But I mean, you try to do [00:46:00] what I tried to do and not have a degree of fierceness to go along with your discernment, you know, just to see if you can drag this carcass across the threshold. Anyway, that happened too.Chris: Wow. Yeah. Dominant culture of North America.Stephen: Heard of it.Chris: Yeah. Well, in Matrimony, there's quite a bit in which you write about hospitality and radical hospitality. And I wanted to move in that direction a little bit, because in terms of these kind of marketplace rituals or ceremonies that you were mentioning you know, it's something that we might wonder, I think, as you have, how did it come to be this [00:47:00] way?And so I'd like to, if I can once again, quote from matrimony in which you speak to the etymology of hospitality. And so for those interested on page 88,"the word hospitality comes from hospitaller, meaning 'one who cares for the afflicted, the infirm, the needy.' There's that thread of our misgivings about being on the receiving end of hospitality. Pull on it. For the written history of the word, at least, it has meant, 'being on the receiving end of a kind of care you'd rather not need.'"End quote.Stephen: That's so great. I mean, before you go on with the quote. It's so great to know that the word, unexamined, just kind of leaks upside, doesn't it? Hospitality, I mean, nobody goes "Hospitality, ew." [00:48:00] And then, if you just quietly do the obvious math to yourself, there's so much awkwardness around hospitality.This awkwardness must have an origin, have a home. There must be some misgiving that goes along with the giving of hospitality, mustn't there be? How else to understand where that kind of ickiness is to be found. Right? And it turns out that the etymology is giving you the beginnings of a way of figuring it out what it is that you're on the receiving end of - a kind of succor that you wish you didn't need, which is why it's the root word for "hospital."Chris: Hmm hmm. Wow.Audience: Hmm.Chris: May I repeat that sentence please? Once more."For the written history of the word, at least, it has meant, [00:49:00] 'being on the receiving end of a kind of care you'd rather not need.'"And so this last part hits home for me as I imagine it does for many.And it feels like the orthodoxy of hospitality in our time is one based not only in transaction, but in debt. And if you offer hospitality to me, then I owe you hospitality.Stephen: Right.Chris: I'm indebted to you. And we are taught, in our time, that the worst thing to be in is in debt.Stephen: Right?Chris: And so people refuse both the desire to give as well as the learning skill of receiving. And this is continuing on page 88 now."But there's mystery afoot with this word. In its old Latin form, hospice meant both 'host' and 'guest.'"Stephen: Amazing. One. Either one, This is absolutely amazing. We're fairly sure that there's a [00:50:00] acres of difference between the giver of hospitality and the receiver that the repertoire is entirely different, that the skew between them is almost insurmountable, that they're not interchangeable in any way. But the history of the word immediately says, "really?" The history of the word, without question, says that "host" and "guest" are virtually the same, sitting in different places, being different people, more or less joined at the hip. I'll say more, but you go ahead with what you were gonna do. Sure.Chris: "In it's proto Indo-European origins, hospitality and hospice is a compound word: gosh + pot. And it meant something like [00:51:00] 'stranger/guest/host + powerful Lord.'It is amazing to me that ancestrally, the old word for guest, host, and stranger were all the same word. Potent ceremonial business, this is. In those days, the server and the serve were partners in something mysterious. This could be confusing, but only if you think of guest, host, and stranger as fixed identities.If you think of them as functions, as verbs, the confusion softens and begins to clear. The word hospice in its ancient root is telling us that each of the people gathered together in hospitality is bound to the others by formal etiquette, yes, but the bond is transacted through a subtle scheme of graces.Hospitality, it tells us, is a web of longing and belonging that binds people for a time, some hithereto unknown to each other is a clutch of mutually-binding elegances, you could say. In its ancient practice, [00:52:00] hospitality was a covenant. According to that accord, however we were with each other. That was how the Gods would be with us. We learn our hospitality by being on the receiving end of Godly administration. That's what giving thanks for members. We proceed with our kin in imitation of that example and in gratitude for it."Mm-hmm.And so today, among "secular" people, with the Gods ignored, this old-time hospitality seems endangered, if not fugitive. I'm curious how you imagine that this rupture arose, the ones that separated and commercialized the radical relationships between hosts and guests, that turned them from verbs to nouns and something like strangers to marketplace functions.[00:53:00]Stephen: Well, of course this is a huge question you've asked, and I'll see if I can unhuge it a bit.Chris: Uhhuh.Stephen: Let's go right to the heart of what happened. Just no preliminaries, just right to it.So, to underscore again, the beauty of the etymology. I've told you over and over again, the words will not fail you. And this is just a shining example, isn't it? That the fraternization is a matter of ceremonial alacrity that the affiliation between host and guest, which makes them partners in something, that something is the [00:54:00] evocation of a third thing that's neither one of them. It's the thing they've lent themselves to by virtue of submitting to being either a host or a guest. One.Two. You could say that in circumstances of high culture or highly-functioning culture, one of the principle attributes of that culture is that the fundament of its understanding, is that only with the advent of the stranger in their midst that the best of them comes forward.Okay, follow that. Yeah.So, this is a little counterintuitive for those of us who don't come from such places. We imagine that the advent of strangers in the midst of the people I'm describing would be an occasion where people hide their [00:55:00] best stuff away until the stranger disappears, and upon the disappearance of the stranger, the good stuff comes out again.You know?So, I'm just remembering just now, there's a moment in the New Testament where Jesus says something about the best wine and he's coming from exactly this page that we're talking about - not the page in the book, but this understanding. He said, you know, "serve your best wine first," unlike the standard, that prevails, right?So again, what a stranger does in real culture is call upon the cultural treasure of the host's culture, and provides the opportunity for that to come forward, right? By which you can understand... Let's say for simplicity's sake, there's two kinds of hospitality. There's probably all kinds of gradations, [00:56:00] but for the purposes of responding to what you've asked, there's two.One of them is based on kinship. Okay? So, family meal. So, everybody knows whose place is whose around the table, or it doesn't matter - you sit wherever you want. Or, when we're together, we speak shorthand. That's the shorthand of familiarity and affinity, right?Everybody knows what everybody's talking about. A lot of things get half-said or less, isn't it? And there's a certain fineness, isn't it? That comes with that kind of affinity. Of course, there is, and I'm not diminishing it at all. I'm just characterizing it as being of a certain frequency or calibre or charge. And the charge is that it trades on familiarity. It requires that. There's that kind of hospitality."Oh, sit wherever you want."Remember this one?[00:57:00]"We don't stand on ceremony here.""Oh, you're one of the family now." I just got here. What, what?But, of course, you can hear in the protestations the understanding, in that circumstance, that formality is an enemy to feeling good in this moment, isn't it? It feels stiff and starched and uncalled for or worse.It feels imported from elsewhere. It doesn't feel friendly. So, I'm giving you now beginnings of a differentiation between how cultures who really function as cultures understand what it means to be hospitable and what often prevails today, trading is a kind of low-grade warfare conducted against the strangeness of the stranger.The whole purpose of treating somebody like their family is to mitigate, and finally neutralize their [00:58:00] strangeness, so that for the purposes of the few hours in front of us all, there are no strangers here. Right? Okay.Then there's another kind, and intuitively you can feel what I'm saying. You've been there, you know exactly what I mean.There's another kind of circumstance where the etiquette that prevails is almost more emphatic, more tangible to you than the familiar one. That's the one where your mother or your weird aunt or whoever she might be, brings out certain kind of stuff that doesn't come out every day. And maybe you sit in a room that you don't often sit in. And maybe what gets cooked is stuff you haven't seen in a long time. And some part of you might be thinking, "What the hell is all this about?" And the answer is: it's about that guy in the [00:59:00] corner that you don't know.And your own ancestral culture told acres of stories whose central purpose was to convey to outsiders their understanding of what hospitality was. That is fundamentally what The Iliad and The Odyssey are often returning to and returning to and returning to.They even had a word for the ending of the formal hospitality that accrued, that arose around the care and treatment of strangers. It was called pomp or pompe, from which we get the word "pompous." And you think about what the word "pompous" means today.It means "nose in the air," doesn't it? Mm-hmm. It means "thinks really highly of oneself," isn't it? And it means "useless, encumbering, kind of [01:00:00] artificial kind of going through the motions stuff with a kind of aggrandizement for fun." That's what "pompous" means. Well, the people who gave us the word didn't mean that at all. This word was the word they used to describe the particular moment of hospitality when it was time for the stranger to leave.And when it was mutually acknowledged that the time for hospitality has come to an end, and the final act of hospitality is to accompany the stranger out of the house, out of the compound, out into the street, and provision them accordingly, and wish them well, and as is oftentimes practiced around here, standing in the street and waving them long after they disappear from view.This is pompous. This is what it actually means. Pretty frigging cool when you get corrected once in a while, isn't it? [01:01:00] Yeah.So, as I said, to be simplistic about it, there's at least a couple of kinds, and one of them treasures the advent of the stranger, understanding it to be the detonation point for the most elegant part of us to come forward.Now, those of us who don't come from such a place, we're just bamboozled and Shanghai'ed by the notion of formality, which we kind of eschew. You don't like formality when it comes to celebration, as if these two things are hostile, one to the other. But I'd like you to consider the real possibility that formality is grace under pressure, and that formality is there to give you a repertoire of response that rescues you from the gross limitations of your autobiography.[01:02:00]Next question. I mean, that's the beginning.Chris: Absolutely. Absolutely. Mm-hmm. Thank you once again, Stephen. So alongside the term or concept of "pompe," in which the the guest or stranger was led out of the house or to the entrance of the village, there was also the consideration around the enforcement of hospitality, which you write about in the book. And you write that"the enforcement of hospitality runs the palpable risk of violating or undoing the cultural value it is there to advocate for. Forcing people to share their good fortune with the less fortunate stretches, to the point of undoing the generosity of spirit that the culture holds dear. Enforcement of hospitality is a sign of the eclipse of hospitality, typically spawned by insecurity, contracted self-definition, and the darkening of the [01:03:00] stranger at the door.Instead, such places and times are more likely to encourage the practice of hospitality in subtle generous ways, often by generously treating the ungenerous."And so there seems to be a need for limits placed on hospitality, in terms of the "pompe," the maximum three days in which a stranger can be given hospitality, and concurrently a need to resist enforcing hospitality. This seems like a kind of high-wire act that hospitable cultures have to balance in order to recognize and realize an honorable way of being with a stranger. And so I'm wondering if you could speak to the possibility of how these limits might be practiced without being enforced. What might that look like in a culture that engages with, with such limits, but without prohibitions?Stephen: Mm-hmm. That's a very good question. [01:04:00] Well, I think your previous question was what happened? I think, in a nutshell, and I didn't really answer that, so maybe see how I can use this question to answer the one that you asked before: what happened? So, there's no doubt in my mind that something happened that it's kind of demonstrable, if only with the benefit of hindsight.Audience: Right.Stephen: Or we can feel our way around the edges of the absence of the goneness of that thing that gives us some feel for the original shape of that thing.So you could say I'm trafficking in "ideals," here, and after a fashion, maybe, yeah. But the notion of "ideals," when it's used in this slanderous way suggests that "it was never like that."Chris: Mm-hmm.Stephen: And I suggest to you it's been like that in a lot of places, and there's a lot of places where it's still like that, although globalization [01:05:00] may be the coup de grâce performed upon this capacity. Okay. But anyway.Okay. So what happened? Well, you see in the circumstance that I described, apropos of the stranger, the stranger is in on it. The stranger's principle responsibility is to be the vector for this sort of grandiose generosity coming forward, and to experience that in a burdensome and unreciprocated fashion, until you realize that their willingness to do that is their reciprocity. Everybody doesn't get to do everything at once. You can't give and receive at the same time. You know what that's called? "Secret Santa at school," isn't it?That's where nobody owes nobody nothing at the end. That's what we're all after. I mean, one of your questions, you know, pointed to that, that there's a kind of, [01:06:00] what do you call that, teeter-totter balance between what people did for each other and what they received for each other. Right. And nobody feels slighted in any way, perfect balance, et cetera.Well, the circumstance here has nothing of the kind going with it. The circumstance we're describing now is one in which the hospitality is clearly unequal in terms of who's eating whose food, for example, in terms of the absolutely frustrated notion of reciprocity, that in fact you undo your end of the hospitality by trying to pay back, or give back, or pay at all, or break even, or not feel the burden of "God, you've been on the take for fricking hours here now." And if you really look in the face of the host, I mean, they're just getting started and you can't, you can't take it anymore.[01:07:00]So, one of the ways that we contend with this is through habits of speech. So, if somebody comes around with seconds. They say, "would you like a little more?"And you say, "I'm good. I'm good. I'm good." You see, "I'm good" is code for what? "F**k off." That's what it's code for. It's a little strong. It's a little strong. What I mean is, when "I'm good" comes to town, it means I don't need you and what you have. Good God, you're not there because you need it you knucklehead. You're there because they need it, because their culture needs an opportunity to remember itself. Right?Okay. So what happened? Because you're making it sound like a pretty good thing, really. Like who would say, "I think we've had enough of this hospitality thing, don't you? Let's try, oh, [01:08:00] keeping our s**t to ourselves. That sounds like a good alternative. Let's give it a week or two, see how it rolls." Never happened. Nobody decided to do this - this change, I don't think. I think the change happened, and sometime long after people realized that the change had had taken place. And it's very simple. The change, I think, went something like this.As long as the guest is in on it, there's a shared and mutually-held understanding that doesn't make them the same. It makes them to use the quote from the book "partners," okay, with different tasks to bring this thing to light, to make it so. What does that require? A mutually-held understanding in vivo as it's happening, what it is.Okay. [01:09:00] So, that the stranger who's not part of the host culture... sorry, let me say this differently.The culture of the stranger has made the culture of the host available to the stranger no matter how personally adept he or she may be at receiving. Did you follow that?Audience: A little.Stephen: Okay. Say it again?Audience: Yes, please.Stephen: Okay. The acculturation, the cultured sophistication of the stranger is at work in his or her strangerhood. Okay. He or she's not at home, but their cultural training helps them understand what their obligations are in terms of this arrangement we've been describing here.Okay, so I think the rupture takes place [01:10:00] when the culturation of one side or the other fails to make the other discernible to the one.One more time?When something happens whereby the acculturation of one of the partners makes the identity, the presence, and the valence of the other one untranslatable. Untranslatable.I could give you an example from what I call " the etiquette of trade," or the... what was the word? Not etiquette. What's the other word?Chris: The covenant?Stephen: Okay, " covenant of trade" we'll call it. So, imagine that people are sitting across from each other, two partners in a trade. Okay? [01:11:00] Imagine that they have one thing to sell or move or exchange and somebody has something else.How does this work? Not "what are the mechanics?" That can be another discussion, but, if this works, how does it work? Not "how does it happen?" How does it actually achieve what they're after? Maybe it's something like this.I have this pottery, and even though you're not a potter, but somebody in your extended family back home was, and you watched what they went through to make a fricking pot, okay?You watched how their hands seized up, because the clay leached all the moisture out of the hands. You distinctly remember that - how the old lady's hands looked cracked and worn, and so from the work of making vessels of hospitality, okay? [01:12:00] It doesn't matter that you didn't make it yourself. The point is you recognize in the item something we could call "cultural patrimony."You recognize the deep-runningness of the culture opposite you as manifest and embodied in this item for trade. Okay? So, the person doesn't have to "sell you" because your cultural sophistication makes this pot on the other side available to you for the deeply venerable thing that it is. Follow what I'm saying?Okay. So, you know what I'm gonna say next? When something happens, the items across from you cease to speak, cease to have their stories come along with them, cease to be available. There's something about your cultural atrophy that you project onto the [01:13:00] item that you don't recognize.You don't recognize it's valence, it's proprieties, it's value, it's deep-running worth and so on. Something happened, okay? And because you're not making your own stuff back home or any part of it. And so now, when you're in a circumstance like this and you're just trying to get this pot, but you know nothing about it, then the enterprise becomes, "Okay, so what do you have to part with to obtain the pot?"And the next thing is, you pretend you're not interested in obtaining the pot to obtain the pot. That becomes part of the deal. And then, the person on the making end feels the deep running slight of your disinterest, or your vague involvement in the proceedings, or maybe the worst: when it's not things you're going back and forth with, but there's a third thing called money, which nobody makes, [01:14:00] which you're not reminded of your grandma or anyone else's with the money. And then, money becomes the ghost of the original understanding of the cultural patrimony that sat between you. That's what happened, I'm fairly sure: the advent, the estrangement that comes with the stranger, instead of the opportunity to be your cultural best when the stranger comes.And then of course, it bleeds through all kinds of transactions beyond the "obvious material ones." So, it's a rupture in translatability, isn't it?Chris: You understand this to happen or have happened historically, culturally, et cetera, with matrimony as well?Stephen: Oh, absolutely. Yeah.Yeah. This is why, for example, things like the fetishization of virginity.Audience: Mm-hmm. [01:15:00]Stephen: I think it's traceable directly to what we're talking about. How so? Oh, this is a whole other long thing, but the very short version would be this.Do you really believe that through all of human history until the recent liberation, that people have forever fetishized the virginity of a young woman and jealously defended it, the "men" in particular, and that it became a commodity to trade back and forth in, and that it had to be prodded and poked at to determine its intactness? And this was deemed to be, you know, honourable behavior?Do you really think that's the people you come from, that they would've do that to the most cherished of their [01:16:00] own, barely pubescent girls? Come on now. I'm not saying it didn't happen and doesn't still happen. I'm not saying that. I'm saying, God almighty, something happened for that to be so.And I'm trying to allude to you now what I think took place. Then all of a sudden, the hymen takes the place of the pottery, doesn't it? And it becomes universally translatable. Doesn't it? It becomes a kind of a ghosted artifact of a culturally-intact time. It's as close as you can get.Hence, this allegation of its purity, or the association with purity, and so on. [01:17:00] I mean, there's lots to say, but that gives you a feel for what might have happened there.Chris: Thank you, Stephen. Thank you for being so generous with your considerations here.Stephen: You see why I had to write a book, eh?Audience: Mm-hmm.Stephen: There was too much bouncing around. Like I had to just keep track of my own thoughts on the matter.But can you imagine all of this at play in the year, oh, I don't know, 2022, trying to put into motion a redemptive passion play called "matrimony," with all of this at play? Not with all of this in my mind, but with all of this actually disfiguring the anticipation of the proceedings for the people who came.Can you imagine? Can you imagine trying to pull it off, and [01:18:00] contending overtly with all these things and trying to make room for them in a moment that's supposed to be allegedly - get ready for it - happy.I should have raised my rates on the first day, trying to pull that off.But anyway.Okay, you go now,Chris: Maybe now you'll have the opportunity.Stephen: No, man. No. I'm out of the running for that. "Pompe" has come and come and gone. Mm.Chris: So, in matrimony, Stephen, you write that"the brevity, the brevity of modern ceremonies is really there to make sure that nothing happens, nothing of substance, nothing of consequence, no alchemy, no mystery, no crazy other world stuff. That overreach there in its scripted heart tells me that deep in the rayon-wrapped bosom of that special day, the modern wedding is scared [01:19:00] silly of something happening. That's because it has an ages-old abandoned memory of a time when a wedding was a place where the Gods came around, where human testing and trying and making was at hand, when the dead lingered in the wings awaiting their turn to testify and inveigh."Gorgeous. Gorgeous.Audience: Mm-hmm.Chris: And so I'm curious ifStephen: "Rayon-wrapped bosom." That's not, that's not shabby.Chris: "Rayon-wrapped bosom of that special day." Yeah.So, I'm curious do you think the more-than-human world practices matrimony, and if so, what, if anything, might you have learned about matrimony from the more-than-human world?Stephen: I would say the reverse. I would say, we practice the more-than-human world in matrimony, not that the more-than-human world practices matrimony. We practice them, [01:20:00] matrimonially.Next. Okay. Or no? I just gonna say that, that's pretty good.Well, where do we get our best stuff from? Let's just wonder that. Do we get our best stuff from being our best? Well, where does that come from? And this is a bit of a barbershop mirrors situation here, isn't it? To, to back, back, back, back.If you're thinking of time, you can kind of get lost in that generation before, or before, before, before. And it starts to sound like one of them biblical genealogies. But if you think of it as sort of the flash point of multiple presences, if you think of it that way, then you come to [01:21:00] credit the real possibility that your best stuff comes from you being remembered by those who came before you.Audience: Hmm.Stephen: Now just let that sit for a second, because what I just said is logically-incompatible.Okay? You're being remembered by people who came before you. That's not supposed to work. It doesn't work that way. Right?"Anticipated," maybe, but "remembered?" How? Well, if you credit the possibility of multiple beginnings, that's how. Okay. I'm saying that your best stuff, your best thoughts, not the most noble necessarily. I would mean the most timely, [01:22:00] the ones that seem most needed, suddenly.You could take credit and sure. Why, why not? Because ostensibly, it arrives here through you, but if you're frank with yourself, you know that you didn't do that on command, right? I mean, you could say, I just thought of it, but you know in your heart that it was thought of and came to you.I don't think there's any difference between saying that and saying you were thought of.Audience: Mm-hmm.Stephen: So, that's what I think the rudiments of old-order matrimony are. They are old people and their benefactors in the food chain and spiritually speaking. Old people and their benefactors, the best part of them [01:23:00] willed to us, entrusted and willed to us. So, when you are willing to enter into the notion that old-order matrimony is older than you, older than your feelings for the other person, older than your love, and your commitment, and your willingness to make the vows and all that stuff, then you're crediting the possibility that your love is not the beginning of anything.You see. Your love is the advent of something, and I use that word deliberately in its Christian notion, right? It's the oncomingness, the eruption into the present day of something, which turns out to be hugely needed and deeply unsuspected at the same time.I used to ask in the school, "can you [01:24:00] have a memory of something you have no lived experience of?" I think that's what the best part of you is. I'm not saying the rest of you is shite. I'm not saying that. You could say that, but I am saying that when I say "the best part of you," that needs a lot of translating, doesn't it?But the gist of it is that the best part of you is entrusted to you. It's not your creation, it's your burden, your obligation, your best chance to get it right. And that's who we are to those who came before us. We are their chance to get it right, and matrimony is one of the places where you practice the gentle art of getting it right.[01:25:00] Another decent reason to write a book.Chris: So, gorgeous. Wow. Thank you Stephen. I might have one more question.Stephen: Okay. I might have one more answer. Let's see.Chris: Alright. Would I be able to ask if dear Nathalie Roy could join us up here alongside your good man.So, returning to Matrimony: Ritual, Culture and the Heart's Work. On page 94, [01:26:00] Stephen, you write that"hospitality of the radical kind is

This week on the show: some seriously cutting-edge territory. George A talks about what he saw at the Love and Sex with Robots conference in Montreal. Then George K and George A discuss AI companions, embodied LLMs, and the wild intersection of technology and human intimacy.This isn't just about sex robots - it's about the broader question of how AI is reshaping fundamental human experiences. The reality check: If you think this stuff is too niche or weird to matter, give it 5 years. This technology is going to be everywhere - in education, therapy, companionship. The question isn't whether it's coming, it's whether we'll think through the implications before it's too late.This might be one of the most uncomfortable (and important) tech conversation we're not having as a society.Fair warning: This episode gets real, fast. But if you work in tech, security, or just want to understand where we're heading as a species, it's worth your time.Stay tuned to the end to hear about the "door prize" George A from the conference that is gonna make the office Secret Santa…interesting.Mentioned this episode: Our Season 4 opener with Savannah Sly Gov Pritzker Signs Legislation Prohibiting AI Therapy in Illinois Parents of teenager who took his own life sue OpenAI You can read the full text of the lawsuit here Scene from Interstellar that George K references

Record-breaking Armagh man Marty Rafferty spoke to Frank the day after just his 27 hour buskathon - which raised valuable funds for the Secret Santa charity Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In episode #128 of the Growth Series podcast's Mortgage Mentors series, Jeremy Duncombe, Managing Director at Accord Mortgages, chats with mortgage industry veteran Dev Malle, Chief Business Development Officer at Simplify, whose 35-year career spans lending, broking, and conveyancing.  Dev shares lessons on resilience, adaptability, and innovation, plus personal stories of trekking adventures and mental health advocacy. From career milestones to mentorship, cultural exploration, and a lighthearted Secret Santa moment, this conversation offers both professional insight and personal warmth.  

This week on Bone to Pick, Robert Kelly and Paul Virzi dive headfirst into some of the funniest, most painfully relatable gripes you've ever heard. From the chaos of parents pushing baby strollers while wrangling dogs, to the rage-inducing mystery of why clothing sizes are never actually true to size, to a mailman's scorched-earth rant about clueless small talk in 100° heat—this episode is a rollercoaster of comedy and catharsis. You'll hear about benefits gone wrong, scammers faking cancer for cash, Secret Santa disasters, and the eternal battle between “one more drink” guys and those who know when the night's over.   Join us on Patreon at www.patreon.com/bonetopickcast

EPISODE 180 – WHITE HOUSE DOWN “It stars Channing Tatum as a guy who's going above and beyond to be a good dad. Isn't that like a wild sexual fantasy for you?”It's Brian's Secret Santa gift to Brandon: the non-Fallen White House takeover, White House Down! This week, Ashley remembers when we rooted for the President; Chris imagines a grifter in the White House; Brandon pitches a new season of The West Wing; and Brian stands up and cheers. BTW: An absolutely unhinged Parents Guide entry! Starring: Channing Tatum, Jamie Foxx, Maggie Gyllenhaal, Jason Clarke, Richard Jenkins, Joey King, James Woods, Nicolas Wright, Jimmi Simpson, and Lance Reddick Directed by Roland Emmerich FOLLOW US:Patreon (https://www.patreon.com/trashwatch)Instagram (@trashwatchpodcast)TikTok (@trashwatchpodcast)YouTube (https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC5YpPcNIBmqNvvLvxa3WTLA)Email (trashwatchpodcast@gmail.com)Listen to Brian's music at (https://www.brianhorne.com)Support the show

Coming to you from the JRE Tobacco Aladino Studios, Nick fires up a Crux Bull & Bear and discusses the various characters you meet in a cigar lounge. You've all encountered them. Maybe you are one of them. But he covers the various types of people you'll meet and how, no matter what shop you're in, you'll find these people. Also, Nick makes a special guest announcement for PulpitFest! Don't miss it! Find out what Nick has been watching in the Villiger Cigars Entertainment Report, including a new show you'll like if you liked Ted Lasso. And learn about a man who acted as a Secret Santa giving away over a million dollars in the Fly High with Blackbird Cigars segment. Make sure you secure your PulpitFest 2025 tickets! They're moving fast! Get your calls in for Ask the Pulpit at (863)874-0000. SUPPORT OUR SPONSORS... For all your online cigar purchasing needs, head over to 2GuysCigars.com! In business for 40 years, they are THE trusted name in the cigar industry! Family owned and operated, they provide a great selection, fair prices, and outstanding customer service. That's 2GuysCigars.com! Follow JRE Tobacco/Aladino at @AladinoCigars on Instagram or check out their website, JRETobacco.com for a store near you that carries their cigars Follow Villiger Cigars at @VilligerCigar on Instagram or check out their website, VilligerCigars.com for a store near you that carries their cigars, or visit their new online shop at https://villigercigars.store/home Follow Blackbird Cigars at @blackbirdcigar on Instagram or check out their website, BlackbirdCigar.com for a store near you that carries their cigars

Happy Monday, Christmas Fanatics! This episode was recorded pre-Memorial Day, but due to life, didn't get edited until this past weekend! Better late than never though, right? Kick off your week the right way by joining Julia, Thom, and Anthony as they gather to discuss the one Christmas episode of the comedy, "Last Man on Earth"! For those following along at home, the episode in question is Season 2, Episode 10: "Secret Santa"!  Regardless of the elves' opinions on the episode, and the show in general, we guarantee this is one festive, fun episode that's sure to inject some holiday spirit into your Monday morning! So settle back, relax, and enjoy! And, as always, thanks for your love and support, y'all!

Judy Gold joins Ralph Sutton and Dov Davidoff and they discuss ending her podcast after ten years, being known as a lesbian comedian, Judy Gold having two knee replacements shrinking from 6'3" to 6'1", how a twist to Secret Santa lead Judy Gold to become a comedian, getting bullied as a kid for being so tall, working with Glenn Close and Meat Loaf in The Ballad of Lucy Whipple, a game KD Slang where they try to guess the meaning of lesbian terms, Judy Gold's first concert, first drug and first sexual experience and so much more!(Air Date: May 3rd, 2025)To advertise your product or service on GaS Digital podcasts please go to TheADSide.com and click on "Advertisers" for more information!You can watch The SDR Show LIVE for FREE every Wednesday and Saturday at 9pm ET at GaSDigitalNetwork.com/LIVEOnce you're there you can sign up at GaSDigitalNetwork.com with promo code: SDR for discount on your subscription which will give you access to every SDR show ever recorded! On top of that you'll also have the same access to ALL the shows that GaS Digital Network has to offer!Follow the whole show on social media!Judy GoldTwitter: https://twitter.com/JewdyGoldInstagram: https://instagram.com/JewdyGoldRalph SuttonTwitter: https://twitter.com/iamralphsuttonInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/iamralphsutton/Dov DavidoffTwitter: https://twitter.com/DovDavidoffInstagram: https://instagram.com/DovDavidoffShannon LeeTwitter: https://twitter.com/IMShannonLeeInstagram: https://instagram.com/ShannonLee6982The SDR ShowTwitter: https://twitter.com/theSDRshowInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/thesdrshow/See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Watch on Philo! - Philo.tv/DTHWe meet The Balsano family. They are all getting together at the old family home. It's a huge family gathering, complete with dads talking about robots, baking, grandma, and kids playing video games. We see in the basement, there is a "for sale" sign that's kind of been put in a corner. They all rush outside to cheer as firetrucks speed down the streets, all decked out in Christmas lights. And, of course, Santa Claus. Afterwards, we find out that not only are the parents secretly selling the house, but it's already done. They come back inside, eat dinner , and do Secret Santa. As the rest of the family sits down to watch old home videos, two of the teenage girls, Emily & Michelle, sneak out to hang out with their friends. As they speed down the back roads, we see some police officers going full speed gun mode on Christmas Eve. But they don't care. They don't do anything.They meet up with some other teenagers. They all meet up at a diner and then go get some beers. One of the dumb boys ends up throwing one of the beers which lands on a windshield in the parking lot that shatters. The cops are called but they're too busy talking about their hypothetical feelings for one another to do anything about it. The teenagers scatter and go to make-out point where they all just kind of pair off into the back of cars. Emily grabs her bag of bagels and heads home as one of the family members falls asleep on the piano. 

Learn how to talk about getting a gift for someone. Plus, find out what the Secret Santa tradition is all about. - در این قسمت یاد بگیرید که چگونه در مورد هدیه گرفتن برای کسی صحبت کنید. به علاوه، دریابید که سنت Secret Santa در مورد چیست.

Firstime guest and Equipment Manager for our Patreon Team Yael Wylie joined the Bench for this Ede-hosted game. In this episode, Ede stumped both teams with his Missing Link (Hint: It was not that they were all running backs or that they're all black), we came to an agreement that there is no such thing as Alvin beans, we reminisced about Hall of Fame pitchers Jack Ass and Milfred Hunter (whose catchphrase was "Keep Pounding!"), we answered the question "What if Josh was one of us?", and Ede introduced us to the first (of many to come) Women in Sports question based on the Secret Santa gift he was given (Thanks David) #harleyquinn #sandiegosuperchargers #runningbacks #alvinbeans #hof #keeppounding #womeninsports #thanksdavid https://dobosdelights.com/ Promo Code: CheckYourTaint https://www.patreon.com/benchwarmerstp https://www.facebook.com/benchwarmerstp https://www.twitter.com/benchwarmerstp https://www.instagram.com/benchwarmerstp/ https://www.teepublic.com/stores/benchwarmers-trivia-podcast 

Happy Valentine's Week! Let's celebrate with a cat-neutering campaign, to-go Velvetta, Jibbitz vision boards. Oh, and Santa.   We're super charmed by CUNY's callout for couples who met on campus and want our alma mater to do the same. And: Please take note of River Kitty Cafe's ‘Neuter Your Ex' initiative.    How do we these Vans in adult sizes?    If you're in NYC and looking for Galentine's Day plans, come to our event about the bonkbuster on Feb. 13. Dream panelists!!   Back to the onions: Pauline Chalamet advocates for putting a cut one under your bed when you start to feel sick.   Live La Dolce Velveeta with Vel2Go, lol.   Fiber! See: Floura.    Also, are we manifesting via Jibbitz now?   Friends, the fire-proof bag.   Do you know who Claire's Secret Santa is? Let us know at 833-632-5463, podcast@athingortwohq.com, @athingortwohq, or in our Geneva.   Learn from the best with MasterClass and an additional 15% off any annual membership when you use our link. Support a balanced gut microbiome with Ritual's Synbiotic+ and get 25% off your first month with our link. YAY.  

Topics discussed on this week's episode include: Some early wedding planning Hipster wedding trends that need to end Kyle's up coming Hawaii Short APS update Steve's throat demon Kyle reached peak old guy this weekend Secret Santa gift exchange The Fast 5 Follow us on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram. Get show merch here! Please review the show wherever you download podcasts! Wanna send something? The Steve and Kyle Podcast P.O. Box 371 Hudsonville, MI 49426 Opening music: ”Malt Shop Bop" by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/ Closing music: "Pulse" by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/ TAGS: funny, friends, family, kids, comedy, talk radio, talk, radio, pop culture, music, food, garage, sports, relationships, viral videos, social media, politics, fbhw, free beer and hot wings

Welcome to Episode 354 of the Neuroscience Meets Social and Emotional Learning Podcast! Join host Andrea Samadi as she concludes the 18-week self-leadership series with Grant Bosnick's revolutionary insights into the neuroscience of presence. Discover how your internal thoughts, external behaviors, and interactions shape your presence, and learn practical strategies to enhance your mindfulness and connection with others. This episode dives into Dr. Dan Siegel's 'Wheel of Awareness' meditation, offering three actionable tips to strengthen your presence in daily life. Uncover how to elevate your relationships and productivity by integrating mindfulness practices into your routine. Whether you're striving to be the most interesting or the most interested person in the room, this episode provides valuable guidance. Prepare to close the year with heightened awareness and step into 2025 with a new perspective on leadership and personal growth. On today's episode #354 we continue with the final topic of our 18-Week Self-Leadership Series based on Grant Bosnick's “Tailored Approaches to Self-Leadership: A Bite Size Approach Using Psychology and Neuroscience” that we first dove into with our interview on EP #321[i] the end of January 2024. The goal was that each week, we focused on learning something new, (from Grant's book) tied to the most current neuroscience research, that builds off the prior week, to help take us to greater heights this year. It honestly shocked me that this series took the entire year. Our final topic today, will be the neuroscience of presence, and then stay tuned for a review of the entire series to help us to move forward in 2025 with a new lens.  ((On today's EPISODE #354 “The Neuroscience of Presence” we will cover)): ✔ Chapter 19 of Grant Bosnick's Tailored Approaches to Self-Leadership with the topic of presence. ✔ Grant Bosnick's Presence Framework with examples of subtle and direct presence. ✔ The Neuroscience of Presence using Dr. Dan Siegel's book Aware: The Science and Practice of Presence ✔ Three Tips to Develop More Presence in our Day to Day Life. ✔ Reflections for using Mindfulness and Meditation to Improve Our Presence. If you've taken the leadership self-assessment[ii], look to see if Presence (in Pathway 2), along with inspiration and motivation, persuade and influence, is of a low, medium or high priority for you to focus on this year. I was not surprised to see this pathway is a high area of focus for me as I'm always looking for new ways to motivate, inspire and influence, and presence is something I know I need to work on daily, bringing my attention back to the present moment or you might catch me daydreaming. It made me laugh when Masati Sajady mentioned he noticed this with me, back on EP 348[iii] last year. Our presence is something that can be felt, that's for sure. Now let's take this deeper with Grant's book. Grant opens up chapter 19, his final chapter, by saying that presence “is a product of our internal thoughts, external behaviors and interactions with others. It's something (he says) that we carry with us at all times, whether we're walking into a meeting room (or walking anywhere I might add) or sitting at a bus stop.” (Ch 19, Bosnick, Tailored Approaches to Self-Leadership, Page 252). I can demonstrate this one easily because we have all been there. I'll never forget Dr. Dan Siegel, who we interviewed way back in our early days of this podcast, on EP 28[iv] talking about this topic, as he watched a mother with a young child walking, and the mother was on her cell phone, not present at all. He talked about the many opportunities for connection that were lost in this instance, and I never forgot it, as I've been guilty of doing exactly the same thing and potentially losing out on opportunities to make meaningful connections with others. Or think about this. In a conversation, someone is talking to you, and you notice the void. They've left the conversation. They are standing right in front of you, they could be looking you straight in the face, but they are no longer present mentally. You don't need to ask them where they have gone, you can just feel it, and they eventually come back, but you know they gave you half of their attention. Has this ever happened to you? Of course, it has. Bosnick says that our presence “can be direct or subtle presence; and it can be controlled or uncontrolled. With direct controlled presence, we can be the most interesting person in the room—being assertive, measured and engaging (he says). With subtle controlled presence, we can be the most interested person in the room—being observant, connected and attentive.” (Ch 19, Bosnick, Tailored Approaches to Self-Leadership, Page 252) and he says “both add value in different situations.” Whether you're striving to be the most interesting or the most interested person in the room, this episode provides valuable guidance. Prepare to close the year with heightened awareness and step into 2025 with a new perspective on leadership and personal growth. Bosnick says that our presence “can be direct or subtle presence; and it can be controlled or uncontrolled. With direct controlled presence, we can be the most interesting person in the room—being assertive, measured and engaging (he says). With subtle controlled presence, we can be the most interested person in the room—being observant, connected and attentive.” (Ch 19, Bosnick, Tailored Approaches to Self-Leadership, Page 252) and he says “both add value in different situations.” IMAGE CREDIT: Chapter 19 Grant Bosnick's Tailored Approaches to Self-Leadership When I think about the most interested person in the room, my mind goes to our company Zoom meetings, where there is one person, Nikki, who always has her camera on, and she is always listening to the conversation actively, showing she is truly interested. She's an incredible role model for the rest of us, and I find her attention to be motivating. This past Christmas holiday, we did a Secret Santa at our work, and Nikki was one of the organizers. I thought it would be fun to participate, so I signed up for this chance to get to know some of my work colleagues in a different way. When my box arrived at my house, and we all met on a call to open our gifts together, I was blown away with the items that were bought for me. The person who was my Secret Santa knew me well! They found out I enjoy hiking in my spare time, and bought me some items that I can really use, when I'm out on the hiking trails. This person demonstrated they were “interested” in me, with a subtle presence, by being observant, connected and attentive. Wouldn't you know it, that my Secret Santa was Nikki! And her presence made me want to do the same thing for others. What about the most interesting person in the room? We all know this one. With direct, controlled presence, they become “assertive, measured and engaging” and it's hard to take your eyes off of them. They are impossible to miss. I'm sure we can all close our eyes and think of an example of someone who uses their direct, controlled presence, really well. No one wants to be “invisible” or on the other hand “overwhelming” so this idea of presence takes practice. Bosnick says that while “some people are naturally skilled at controlling and flexing between levels of presence (like my coworker Nikki), “most of us need to consciously work at it to bring it into our control and use it to our best advantage.” (Ch 19, Bosnick, Tailored Approaches to Self-Leadership, Page 253) So how can we improve our presence?  Let's go straight to the expert on this topic, Dr. Dan Siegel, whose book, Aware: The Science and Practice of Presence,[v] dives deep into a meditation practice, called The Wheel of Awareness, that uses science and psychology to “strengthen your capacity for presence.” (Aware, Dan Siegel).   What is the Neuroscience of Presence? This is what Dr. Dan Siegel helps us to understand in his book, Aware that outlines why the meditation he created (The Wheel of Awareness) begins with helping us to become more mindful, but the byproduct of this mindfulness, is that “people seem interested in exploring how they might cultivate more presence in their lives so they can be healthier, happier and kinder to themselves and others.” (Dr. Siegel, Aware). Of course at the end of our interview, 6 year ago now, Dr. Siegel asked me what I was learning from doing his Wheel of Awareness Meditation every day. I shared what I learned in an extensive review of Dr. Siegel's Wheel of Awareness Meditation, on EP 60[vi] “The Science Behind a Meditation Practice with a Deep Dive into Dr. Dan Siegel's Wheel of Awareness.”  It took me some time to uncover what I learned, but not only does this scientifically proven meditation change the structure and function of the brain in these fascinating ways: There's an integration of structure and function of the brain (integration means well-being). There's a reduction of the stress hormone cortisol. There's an enhancement of immune function. Improvement in cardiovascular risk factors. Reduction in inflammation via epigenetic changes. An optimization of telomerase—which is fascinating as it repairs and maintains the ends of chromosomes which slows aging. In addition to these brain changes, I noticed an increase of ability with my 5 senses, also, with increased sensations within my body, and most importantly, what Dr. Siegel was looking to see if I noticed, was that it helped to increase my connection to people around me, expanding my “presence” far outside of myself, and into the world around me. If you type the word “presence” into Dr. Siegel's book, Aware, you will find it's listed 85 times. Within his Wheel of Awareness Meditation he shares “is about monitoring with stability whatever is arising as it arises (when you do this practice day after day). It's this awareness that (he says) we are calling presence.” (Aware, Siegel, Page 29). How to Develop More Presence in Our Lives? “How can we become more mindful (or present) in our day-to-day living so that we are aware of what's happening?” (whatever is arising day to day)? Dr. Dan Siegel suggests that we “do a regular practice that trains the mind…That training of the mind is sometimes called meditation. (Where he says) we learn to strengthen (our) focused attention.” (Aware, Dr. Siegel, Page 14). Here are three tips to start to become more present (with whatever it is that arises) in our day to day life: MEDITATE TO STRENGTHEN OUR MIND: Find a meditation where you must be active (not just sit, listen and drift off). It could be Dan Siegel's Wheel of Awareness[vii] or even our most downloaded episode series of all-time, The Silva Method.[viii] Find the best time of day to practice strengthening your mind, and stay consistent. NEXT PRACTICE BEING MINDFUL: Once we have strengthened our mind, now we've got to put this mental strength into practice. Like Nikki on Zoom calls, she increased her presence by being the most interested person in the room. Or what about when we are in a conversation with someone else, and our mind wanders. Are you able to mindfully bring it back? Dr. Siegel reminds us that “mental presence is a state of being awake and receptive to what is happening, as it is happening in the moment, within us, and between the world and us.” ( Aware, Siegel, Page 14). FINALLY, NOTICE WHAT HAPPENS WITH THIS INCREASED PRESENCE: As we work on strengthening our own presence in the world, and as we are observant, connected and attentive to others (or present) Dr. Siegel would say that we go from the state of “I” to a more integrated self that he calls “MWE.” This is where you/me connect together and like I noticed with the Wheel of Awareness practice, it increased the importance of expanding my presence outside of myself, to include others around me, in the world. When we can be truly present in our work or personal lives, we will begin to notice the connections around us, and how important they are. It takes some time though, to put this into practice, as we are bombarded with distractions daily, that take us away from this much-needed presence. In chapter 19 of his book, Grant Bosnick asks us to reflect on his Presence Framework, image 19.1 and asks us: Have you ever felt uncontrolled, direct presence where you might be overdoing it and unintentionally overwhelming others? How to use empathy and emotional intelligence to direct yourself back to being more mindful of how you are showing up to others. Think of someone who has controlled direct presence, making them the most interesting person in the room. Think of someone who has controlled subtle presence who appears to be the most interested person, on a consistent basis. Once you know which quadrant you typically show up in with Bosnick's Presence Framework, you can begin the work to train your mind to become more present in your daily work and personal life. I guarantee this will help you to build stronger, more effective relationships with others. You will start seeing how your connections go from thinking about ME…to MWE (or you and me together). To review and conclude this week's episode #354 on “The Neuroscience of Presence” we covered: ✔ Chapter 19 of Grant Bosnick's Tailored Approaches to Self-Leadership with the topic of presence. ✔ Grant Bosnick's Presence Framework with examples of subtle and direct presence. ✔ The Neuroscience of Presence using Dr. Dan Siegel's book Aware: The Science and Practice of Presence ✔ Three Tips to Develop More Presence in our Day to Day Life. ✔ Reflections for using Mindfulness and Meditation to Improve Our Presence, and expand our connection with others in the world. I hope this episode has been as helpful to you as it was for me. Being more present in my daily life (work and personal) is something that takes effort for me, even after implementing Dr. Siegel's Wheel of Awareness Meditation. Distractions come fiercely, every second of the day and it takes a trained mind to divert our attention to what matters the most for us. This takes practice, and effort, but the results are well worth it. With that thought, we will close out this episode, and next time, we will review ALL 19 chapters of Grant Bosnick's Tailored Approaches to Self-Leadership, in one place. See you next time.   REFERENCES:   [i] Neuroscience Meets Social and Emotional Learning Podcast EPISODE #321 with Grant ‘Upbeat' Bosnick  https://andreasamadi.podbean.com/e/insights-from-grant-upbeat-bosnick/   [ii] Self-Assessment for Grant Bosnick's book https://www.selfleadershipassessment.com/   [iii]Neuroscience Meets Social and Emotional Learning Podcast EPISODE #348 with Masati  https://andreasamadi.podbean.com/e/unveiling-exponential-intelligence-transform-your-life-by-shifting-frequencies/   [iv] Neuroscience Meets Social and Emotional Learning Podcast EPISODE #28 with Dr. Dan Siegel   https://andreasamadi.podbean.com/e/clinical-professor-of-psychiatry-at-the-ucla-school-of-medicine-dr-daniel-siegel-on-mindsight-the-basis-for-social-and-emotional-intelligence/   [v] Dr. Dan Siegel, Aware: The Science and Practice and Presence (Published August 21, 2018) https://drdansiegel.com/book/aware/   [vi]Neuroscience Meets Social and Emotional Learning Podcast EPISODE #60 “The Science Behind a Meditation Practice with a Deep Dive into Dr. Dan Siegel's Wheel of Awareness”  https://andreasamadi.podbean.com/e/the-science-behind-a-meditation-practice-with-a-deep-dive-into-dr-dan-siegel-s-wheel-of-awareness/   [vii] https://www.drdansiegel.com/resources/wheel_of_awareness/   [viii]Neuroscience Meets Social and Emotional Learning Podcast EPISODE #322 A Deep Dive into Applying The Silva Method for Improving Creativity, and Innovation  https://andreasamadi.podbean.com/e/transforming-minds-and-paving-the-future/  

This week, Jordana and Dr. Naomi talk about splurging on your family, and learning how to show appreciation even when you receive a gift that you don't love. Our Overshare comes from a Betch who wonders if it's her place as a stepmom to critique her partner's parenting style. Today's Betchicist goes out to a mom feeling frustrated with family members giving unapproved gifts to her kid. Dr. Naomi writes an intention for managing stress without letting it manifest into a short temper. And we're feeling triggered by getting left out of Secret Santa, and parents who don't prioritize our sobriety journey. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

M'Linda Kula is very familiar with this SECRET SANTA and the many links that tie him to JonBenet Ramsey. Each link is carefully explained within this book, to lead from one connection to the next between JonBenet and the SECRET SANTA. Find out who this SECRET SANTA is and how this chameleon was able to evade the authorities. This same individual also used a term of endearment common to the Ramsey family for JonBenet, in front of his peers and classmates at a karate school. When asked if he was "related to that girl found in a basement" he responded with "I don't know no Johnny B!" No one knew this term of endearment until it was used in the book The Death of Innocence by John Ramsey. The planned murder indicates that the killer knew the victim's schedule. Overkill is usually a message intended for someone else, other than the victim. Who was the overkill message intended for and why? The true name of this SECRET SANTA is listed on Detective Lou Smit's suspect list. JONBENET RAMSEY'S SECRET SANTA- M'Linda Kula Follow and comment on Facebook-TRUE MURDER: The Most Shocking Killers in True Crime History https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100064697978510Check out TRUE MURDER PODCAST @ truemurderpodcast.com

"The people you work with are people you were just thrown together with. You don't know them. It wasn't your choice. Yet you spend more time with them than you do friends or family.But probably all you've got in common is that you walk on the same bit of carpet for eight hours a day. And so, obviously, when someone comes in who you have a connection with…Yeah. Dawn was a ray of sunshine in my life and it meant a lot. But if I'm really being honest, I never thought it would have a happy ending. I don't know what a happy ending is. Life isn't about endings, is it? It's a series of moments” This week we conclude our UK Office rewatch with a deep dive on the Christmas Special! We check in on our favourite characters, with David on the road, Gareth in the boss's chair, and Dawn and Lee in Florida. We follow their storylines all the way to the crescendo at the Christmas Party to see what happens with Tim and Dawn, and to see if David can finally get a laugh or find some luck in love. And along the way we cover all of the celebrity appearances, Secret Santas, and Austin Powers costumes that go into the episode. Then in the Conference Room we do a quick post-Christmas Ordinary Things segment to check in on Edwin's time in Portland and Alex and Sean's babies first Christmases. And then to close the show we do a quick round of BBC Office Trivia sent in by a friend of the pod in the UK!  Support our show and become a member of Scott's Tots on Patreon! For only $5/month, Tots get ad-free episodes plus exclusive access to our monthly Mailbag episodes where we casually pick through every single message/question/comment we receive. We also have Season 2 of our Ted Lasso podcast Biscuits with the Boss available to our Patrons, as well as our White Lotus Christmas Special, Party Down, and unreleased episodes of this show. Oh, and Tots get access to exclusive channels on our Discord. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Game of the Year continues to roll on! We have a whole new slew of categories today including: Best Button, Best Input, Best Hitting, Best Game We Streamed, Best Depressing Game, and Best Moment or Sequence! We also manage to sneak in a Secret Santa drawing where nothing goes wrong!

Abby Shumka returns for a holiday spectacular to talk Muppets, Christmas, traditions, and curling. Plus our annual Secret Santa gift exchange. Follow us: Instagram, Twitter, Facebook, Bluesky.

FULL SHOW: Tuesday, December 24th, 2024 Get your “Merch for a Cause” and Help with Hurricane Relief HERE! Curious if we look as bad as we sound? Follow us @BrookeandJeffrey: Youtube Instagram TikTok BrookeandJeffrey.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Today's Masked Speaker says her company does an annual Secret Santa gift exchange... and when she drew the name of the one person she can't stand at work, she decided to give him a gift he'd never forget...See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

It's the Sexted Christmas Special, and the only way to celebrate is with a three-way Secret Santa! But, surprise surprise, someone might've left the gift shopping to the last minute (no fingers pointed... yet). Meanwhile, the G&Divas have sent in their festive dilemmas, like: is there etiquette for reheating leftovers? Join Sexted Extra and laugh along to William Hanson and Jordan North helping you navigate the challenges of modern life ad free at https://plus.acast.com/s/sextedmyboss. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 181 - Long Overdue Olympics Recap, What Makes a Good Running Partner & Secret Santa by P2E Studios

When it comes to music, December is overflowing with gifts, but we aren't quite done with the presents. This time, the NPR Music team is giving ... to each other! On this episode of All Songs Considered, our hosts, writers and editors get into a sort of chain-letter, Secret Santa-type gift exchange. The rules were simple: Pick a song from 2024 specifically for one of your colleagues, who then has to pick a song for someone else, and so on, until the gift train comes full circle. What songs did we pick? How well do we really know each other's taste? You'll have to listen to hear the surprise, just like we did.Learn more about sponsor message choices: podcastchoices.com/adchoicesNPR Privacy Policy

Jordan gets misty-eyed over a G&Diva's Gingerbread House tribute, while William struggles to grasp Secret Santa rules. The boys also discover a troupe of luxury carollers in Chichester and cringe at an awkward gift exchange from a Help Hotliner. Join Sexted Extra and laugh along to William Hanson and Jordan North helping you navigate the challenges of modern life ad free at https://plus.acast.com/s/sextedmyboss. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Who is your Secret Santa?

HAPPY THURSDAY! Boy oh boy do we have a JAMPACKED show for you today! WAR OF THE ROSES, CHRISTMAS WISH, AND OUR SECRET SANTA UNVEILING (On the Afterwords Podcast Page) + The latest on KANYE and other celebs before we pause for the holidays. Also, a TRUMP Impersonator calls in and Andrea gets surprised with SUNS TICKETS! All of this and SO MUCH MORE TODAY (including KYLES CAVITY UPDATE) ON JOHNJAY AND RICH!

The holidays are here and for long-time listeners, that means one thing and one thing only. The legend! The iconic actor who played George Constanza on Seinfeld--friend of this show—conscience for America—and American icon: Jason Alexander (@IJasonAlexander) is back for his annual Festivus visit and it's every bit as epic as you've come to expect! Yes, friends, FESTIVUS is back!  A Festivus for the rest of us.  And this year Jason is bringing a bag full of goodies to help you navigate the turbulent times 2025 is certain to bring. It's a perfect way to wrap up 2024 and a great listen for you and your whole family as you head over the river and through the woods. 2024 has been a crazy year. And 2025 will be no different. But we're bringing light not heat and we're bringing the conversations you want and the news you need. Every guest on this show has shaped America's past, is impacting America's present, and is driving America's future. And Jason continues to help us understand ourselves, our past, and our future.  He is of course best known for his role as George Costanza in maybe the greatest television series of all time, Seinfeld. He was nominated for seven Primetime Emmy Awards and three Golden Globe Awards. He won a Tony Award. And he's a truly inspiring, fascinating and entertaining man.  And Paul is breaking down drone madness, the “debate” over vaccines, the Army Navy game political post-game review, the defense bill nobody's paying attention to, and the trials of a parent playing Elf on the Shelf! Skip the cable news and partisan spin and get your weekly dose of independent vigilance.  Every episode is the truth beyond the headlines–and light to contrast the heat of other politics and news shows. It's content for the 51% of Americans that proudly call themselves independent. And delivers the Righteous Media 5 Is: independence, integrity, information, inspiration and impact. Independent Americans is your trusted place for independent news, politics, inspiration and hope.  Previous Jason Alexander Festivus appearances: December 28, 2023 - Episode 259 December 19, 2019 - Episode 38 December 18, 2020 - Episode 90   Dec. 15, 2022 - Episode 201 -Learn more about Independent Veterans of America and reach out if you're interested in running in 2025 or 2026.  -WATCH video of Paul and Jason's conversation on our YouTube channel. -Join the movement. Hook into our exclusive Patreon community of Independent Americans. Get extra exclusive content, connect with guests, meet other Independent Americans, attend events, get merch discounts, and support this show that speaks truth to power.  -Check the hashtag #LookForTheHelpers. And share yours.  -Find us on social media or www.IndependentAmericans.us. And get cool IA hats, t-shirts and other merch.  -Check out other Righteous podcasts like The Firefighters Podcast with Rob Serra, Uncle Montel - The OG of Weed and B Dorm.  Independent Americans is powered by veteran-owned and led Righteous Media. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today after the show we opened presents! Have a safe and happy holiday and we will see you all on your speakers in 2025!

Gregg Rosenthal is joined by Colleen Wolfe and Jourdan Rodrigue of The Athletic to hand out Christmas gifts to figures around the NFL. Before the gifts, the crew takes a look at the coaching landscape around the NFL and tells you who they think could be on the move (04:09). Next, secret Santa gifts are given to Caleb Williams (17:54), C.J. Stroud (21:51), Patrick Mahomes (39:56), Mike Evans (48:07), and more! Finally, the show is wrapped up with a Thursday Night Football preview featuring the Broncos on the road against the Chargers (53:36). Note: time codes approximate. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The New York City live show, the after party, gameday, Secret Santa, goodbye to big red - there is so much to catch up on! It's our last episode of the year, but it's a good one. Brooke discovers some new (malar) bags she didn't know she had, and Danielle explores her dental anxiety. The gals address their haters and share some of their holiday and New Year's Eve plans. Happy Holidays and Happy New Year! Live Show Tickets https://linktr.ee/Galsonthego Please support the show by checking out our sponsors! BetterHelp: Gals on the Go is sponsored by BetterHelp! Visit BetterHelp.com/gals to get 10% off your first month! Squarespace: Go to squarespace.com/GALS to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Gametime: Download the Gametime app, create an account, and use code GALSONTHEGO for $20 off your first purchase. GOTG LTK https://www.shopltk.com/explore/Gals_on_the_Go GOTG Newsletter https://gotg.substack.com/ Gals On The Go Instagram https://www.instagram.com/galsonthegopodcast/ Brooke's Youtube Channel https://www.youtube.com/brookemiccio Brooke's Instagram https://www.instagram.com/brookemiccio/ Danielle's Youtube Channel https://www.youtube.com/c/daniellecarolan Danielle's Instagram https://www.instagram.com/daniellecarolan/ Business inquiries can be sent to: GalsOnTheGoPodcastTeam@unitedtalent.com Danielle's LTK: https://www.shopltk.com/explore/daniellecarolan/productsets/11ee5d6284a6acf19fd50242ac110003 Brooke's LTK: https://www.shopltk.com/explore/brookemiccio/productsets/11ee5d662bea0b67931d0242ac110004 SHOP GOTG MERCH! https://fanjoy.co/collections/gals-on-the-go GOTG YouTube Channel (watch full episodes with video!) https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCkCy3xcN257Hb_VWWU5C5vA

Welcome to #Millennial, the home of pretend adulting and real talk! Join us for our last show of 2024! We do our annual gift exchange a little differently this year by getting non-Secret Santa presents for each other. Get ready for all the wholesome vibes, we knocked it out of the park this year! To put a bow on 2024 (does it deserve a bow?) we recount the top stories of the year in terms of news, pop culture, and more. Kamala's brat summer fell out of a coconut tree and surprised and delighted us all - for a brief 100 day window, we were vibing in the context in which we exist.

Gregg Rosenthal is joined by Colleen Wolfe and Jourdan Rodrigue of The Athletic to hand out Christmas gifts to figures around the NFL. Before the gifts, the crew takes a look at the coaching landscape around the NFL and tells you who they think could be on the move (04:09). Next, secret Santa gifts are given to Caleb Williams (17:54), C.J. Stroud (21:51), Patrick Mahomes (39:56), Mike Evans (48:07), and more! Finally, the show is wrapped up with a Thursday Night Football preview featuring the Broncos on the road against the Chargers (53:36). Note: time codes approximate. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

What's that special food treat the guys love turning to? How does Gary turn the smoulder on for his modelling work? What special present has Alan got for the boys this year? Gary, Alan and Micah also discuss the pros and cons of Christmas and find out who the scrooge of the group is! Guinness makes its own debut as the Official Beer and Non-Alcoholic Beer of the Premier League. 18+ only, please drink responsibly and do not share with anyone under the legal drinking age. Search https://www.guinness.com/en-gb/sport/premier-league today Sign up to The Rest Is Football newsletter at therestisfootball.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Heidi got some insider information about her boyfriend Jaden giving his work secret Santa an extra special gift on the side Follow us on socials! @themorningmess

We've got a very special bonus episode for you to brighten up your Monday morning! The fabulous Gabby Logan joined us for lunch and a game of Secret Santa courtesy of Deliveroo. As well as giving each other amazing gifts, we also learned that Gabby grew up in a sporty household, trained as a rhythmic gymnast in her youth, loved trying all the different French foods in Paris for the Olympics, once cooked dinner for Mary Berry, she (fondly!) remembers the bad gift her husband once got her, and tells us all about taking Jessica Ennis to a Barry's Bootcamp class! Thank you to Deliveroo for the gorgeous gifts, and thanks to their speedy service you can have gifts at your door in as little as 25 minutes! #Ad Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It's the Season 2 finale of Too Many Tabs and we are closing the year with a Mrs. P's Book Club episode of Christmas Horror with a review of Secret Santa by Andrew Shaffer. This book has it all, a german demon doll, Fabian Nightingale, bangs, and a backdrop of 1986 New York City.    See Alex Live in Philly on 12/19/2024: https://undergroundarts.org/listing/doogie-horner/   Support the show and get $50 off your Blue Nile purchase of $500 or more. Use code TABS at https://www.bluenile.com    Support the show and get 50% off your 1st Factor box, plus free shipping. Use code 50TOOMANY at https://www.factormeals.com/50TOOMANY    Support the show and start your free online Hims visit today at https://www.hims.com/TABS      To become a Team leader: Join our patreon (not a cult): https://pearlmania500.net   The Pearlmans have a NEW Post Office Box: P.O. Box 72151, Thorndale, PA 19372. Follow us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/pearlmania500/ & https://www.instagram.com/mrs.pearlmania500/  You can watch this episode on our Youtube Channel!!!   All of our music was written and performed by His Name Was Dusk you can find all of his projects, music and more here: https://linktr.ee/hisnamewasdusk  

Ben Lindbergh and Meg Rowley banter about a Tigers tweet about future first-pitch timing and other non-topical PSAs, provide a Secret Santa sign-up reminder, consider baseball authority figures who answer fan mail, discuss the impact that the changing economic landscape of college sports could have on MLB drafting and development, react to Danny Jansen's deal […]

From Overwhelm to Calm: Redefining Your Holiday Season The holiday season often brings a whirlwind of activities, expectations, and societal pressures that can lead to feelings of overwhelm and stress. However, by embracing the concept of holiday essentialism, you can transform your experience into one that is joyful and fulfilling. This approach encourages you to focus on what truly brings you joy while letting go of obligations that do not serve you. Inspired by Greg McCowan's book "Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less," which encourages focusing on fewer but more meaningful activities, Tonya challenges listeners to ask themselves three key questions: What truly brings them joy during the holidays? What activities they do out of obligation? What memories they want to create? She discusses the societal expectations that can turn what should be a joyful time into a marathon of obligations. Tune in to discover how to shift your mindset and focus on what truly matters this holiday season, embracing the simple joys and calm instead of the chaos. Talking Points: 01:09 - Holiday Overwhelm and Societal Pressures 02:13 - Fear of Disappointing Others  04:36 - What is Essentialism? 05:39 - Question 1: What Truly Brings Me Joy? 06:34 - Question 2: What Am I Doing Just Because I Think I Have To? 07:50 - Question 3: What Memories Do I Want to Create? 08:33 - Shifting from Excess to Intention 09:55 - Editing Ruthlessly 14:06 - Mindfulness and Being Present 17:02 - Secret Santa and Charitable Giving 18:04 - Simplifying the Holidays 23:10 - Setting Boundaries for Social Commitments 24:03 - Prioritizing Connection Over Perfection 24:13 - Setting Intentions for the Holiday Season Quotes: "If holidays are not your thing, especially around this time of year, I challenge you to skip it altogether." "The shift in mindset with holiday essentialism is to move from access to intention and from pleasing others to cherishing moments." "Just because you've done something for years doesn't mean you have to continue doing it." "The holidays are not a performance and you don't have to be performative." "Shed the souffle. Seriously, let her go. You don't need to do it." "What people remember is how you made them feel." Useful  Resources: Click HERE for my FREE Calm Meditation  Click HERE to join the Membership  Click HERE for a FREE download  Click HERE to sign up for our newsletter, The Edit   Connect with Self-Image Coach Tonya Leigh: Click HERE to follow our Instagram Click HERE to visit our website Click HERE to visit our Facebook group Click HERE to follow our TikTok Click HERE to subscribe to our YouTube channel  

Welcome to #Millennial, the home of pretend adulting and real listener feedback talk! But first: Joe Biden pardons his son Hunter, and South Korea's President declares martial law for a few hours... what do you think the maga crowd is most upset about? Oxford and Dictionary.com have revealed their 2024 words of the year: Let's give it up for "brain rot" and "demure." Who did it best? Don't forget to check out our new merch store, shop.millennialshow.com! We got cute, comfy hoodies, tees, whiskey glasses, and more! What unique shopping plans do listeners have this holiday season? Laura is trying to decrease her dependence on Amazon, and turned to the #Millennial community for help! Craft fairs, makers markets, Etsy, environmentally sustainable brands like Good.store and Earth Hero are among some of this year's top contenders! We didn't miss out on the general feedback or political feedback either! The #Millennial Confessional is back this week too: is winking at random people weird? Are we giving enough kudos to our postal workers? What to do about bailing on friends? This week's recommendations will keep you nice and entertained on these cold evenings: 'Everything I Need I Get From You: How Fangirls Created The Internet As We Know It' by Kaitlyn Tiffany (Pam), Azul (Andrew), and 'DanDaDan' on Netflix (Laura). And in this week's installment of After Dark: Is gift giving necessary to enjoy this time of year? No. Do people still find a way to create drama around it? Yes. There's always that person who ruins Secret Santa and White Elephant for everyone by not being thoughtful with their gift! If someone tells you your gift is on the way but it never arrives, was there ever really a gift to begin with? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Michael wants to do Secret Santa his own way, and calls to close out the show. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode of Do This, Not That, host Jay Schwedelson discusses why email database growth is a crucial metric that marketers should prioritize beyond cost per acquisition. During the "Ask Us Anything" segment, he delves into the significance of tracking new email subscribers, understanding database decay rates, and how daily monitoring can enhance marketing strategies. Jay also shares a humorous anecdote about his company's experience with Secret Santa and why he decided to discontinue the tradition.=================================================================Best Moments:(01:03) Work question from Brian about important metrics beyond cost per acquisition(01:37) Jay's emphasis on email database growth as a crucial metric(02:14) Discussion on average email database decay rates(03:03) Importance of tracking new email addresses from various sources(04:21) Jay's practice of reviewing new email addresses daily(06:10) Sponsorship mention for Marigold(06:59) Ridiculous question about Secret Santa at Jay's company(07:18) Jay's experience with Secret Santa and why he discontinued it=================================================================MASSIVE thank you to our Sponsor, Marigold!!Marigold is a relationship marketing platform designed to help you acquire new customers and turn them into superfans with their best-in-class loyalty solutions. Don't take my word for it though, American Airlines, Honeybaked Ham, Title Boxing, and Notre Dame University are also customers!Regardless of your size, check out Marigold today to get the solution you need to grow your business!Check out this free content from marigold that Jay has loved digesting, 5 Steps For Selecting The Right Email Marketing Platform.

Today: Greg is now putting pressure on himself for the perfect gift, questions and what to buy for $35, a Florida Man and 132 hamsters, snacktical jacket and Courage Country Christmas, and have a great night all!! 

The movie kicks off with a great rendition of Deck the Halls that might be the new theme song for Deck the Hallmark. Cut to a woman driving in a car, giving herself a pep talk and talking to herself and her baby, whom she is pregnant with. Suddenly, she feels a sharp pain, drives into a town, and runs into a diner, saying she thinks she's going into labor but that the snow is really coming down. Luckily, there's a doctor in the diner who has personally delivered over 100 babies! The birth is successful, and the baby is healthy. She names her Evie Lang. The group takes a picture to celebrate—there's a doctor, a police officer, a lawyer, and some other fancy folks. The doctor gives the baby a little checkup and realizes the baby may have an abdominal blockage, so they all work together to get the baby to the hospital. They save the baby's life, take up a collection to pay the hospital bill, and send them on their way.Cut to the present day, when the mother, Elizabeth Lane, is giving a speech about the success of her skincare brand, Lane Cosmetics. Evie is now an adult, and her mom brings her up on stage to celebrate the success of women. Evie is clearly uncomfortable being on stage. She's in fashion but isn't having much success. Her mom tells her she's been spoiled and needs to learn how to do something hard. So she gives her the Polaroid of the people who helped her on the night she was born. Her mom explains that Evie has to go and find these people and grant Christmas wishes to each of them. If she fails this mission, she'll lose her trust fund.So, Evie heads back to the town and is disappointed by the absolutely massive inn she has to stay in. She goes by the name of Mary so as not to give herself away. She decides to go and ask the only attorney in town for help finding the people in this picture. He says, “I could do that, but why would I?” She says she wants to give them an award. He replies, “That's not what this town is all about, especially dressed like that.” So, she goes to find an outfit that's a bit more low-key. They go and grab a bite to eat, and the diner owner tells them the story of what happened that night.Kyle agrees to help her find the people, but they're going to go at his pace. Up first is Roy, and Evie ends up being voluntold to be the elf in the town square. The diner owner quickly figures out who she is, and she comes clean. She asks what his wish is. At first, he's hesitant but tells her to let him think on it. She is blown away by how nice everyone in this town is and realizes that's going to make it hard for her to finish this project quickly.The next day, she ends up backing out and almost hitting a police car. Turns out, that cop is someone she needs to repay, but she doesn't want to reveal her true identity, so she ends up getting arrested. Evie is blown away by the kindness and doesn't know how she's going to repay them. She finds out that someone has been this town's Secret Santa—paying hospital bills, etc., for a long time. She calls her mom, and her mom explains that she tried to repay everyone many moons ago but couldn't do it. So, good luck, kid. It's just your trust fund at risk.The pressure is mounting, and what better way to deal with said pressure than by ice skating with Kyle? She decides to tell him the truth about who she is, and Kyle's like, “Oh, yeah, I know.” But he was unaware that she was doing this just to make sure she didn't lose her trust fund. You can tell he's like, “Oh, boo hoo to you,” but they continue their quest, and he continues to just watch her from afar.The diner owner is impressed by Evie, and he calls Elizabeth to encourage her to come and see all the good that Evie has been doing in the town. So, Elizabeth comes, and she's so proud of Evie. She has done so much good. She finds out that Kyle's dad was the one who took the picture, so she has to make his wish come true.They have a birthday party at the diner for Evie, and she tells her mom she wants to do more of this kind of stuff with her trust fund. She asks Kyle what he wants, and he says, “I want you,” and they kiss. Everyone takes one more picture together. 

Will Weldon (Host of "I Hate Bill Maher" podcast) has never seen ID2, but he rewrote it and we read his script. Folks, this episode is chaos. Will, a former roommate of Kyle's delves into some talk of old internet videos, old VHS trading, and more. We read Will's script, play some games, and generally just jeer at Kyle's puns, just like the old days. Will and Kyle are joined by Diego McCafferty, who insisted I leave his full address un-censored. There is a MUCH extended, very explicit episode that discusses early-internet-videos, only on our patreon at patreon.com/neverseenit Please sign up for our Secret Santa! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Listen to all my reddit storytime episodes in the background in this easy playlist: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL_wX8l9EBnOM303JyilY8TTSrLz2e2kRGWatch my videos in full on my YouTube channel (you even get to see my face!): https://www.youtube.com/Redditor This is the Redditor podcast! Here you will find all of Redditor's best Reddit stories from his YouTube channel. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Threevisiting on the Tues: Scott, Paul & Lauren introduce all of their intros recorded during the midseason hiatus, share a big announcement about next season, and play Switch It And Pitch It. Send Threetures and emails to threedomusa@gmail.com.Leave us a voicemail asking us a question at hagclaims8.comFollow us on Instagram @ThreedomUSA.Listen ad-free and unlock bi-weekly THREEMIUMS on cbbworld.comGrab some new Threedom merch at cbbworld.com/merchSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.