Blue Wife Life

We speak with Christina Dages, wife of fired La Mesa Police Officer, Matthew Dages. Their day started like any other day but after Matthew came home from work protesters showed up the Dages home. A video of an arrest Matthew made that day had gone viral. Their address, phone number and social media accounts had been released to the public. That was over a year ago now. Matthew has since been cleared of low level use of force, passed a voluntary polygraph, the subject admits to pushing Dages and his report is corroborated by witnesses and other on scene officers. So why is he still being prosecuted?  We talk about the ways you can get involved with the "Clear Officer Dages" fight and what Christina wants to share with other leows. She wants you to protect your privacy starting today because this could be any one of our husbands.   

Today we introduce you to Steve and Tracy Gonzales. While he is currently a law enforcement officer, there was one time he wore the title of soldier and for thirty days the title of Prisoner of War. Steve tells us about that time in his life then brings us twenty years up to date. While Tracy and Steve weren't married at the time of his capture but rather friends, we knew you would value her perspective through their marriage. As the interviews draws to a conclusion we talk PTSD, a topic we can all use more information on. 

It's been a while since we interviewed our own leos. We wrangled them in to discuss their views on parenting within the context of their jobs. How does their job influence their parenting? That would sound by comparison to many other careers but as you know this is a job with ripple effects. This is a good time interview with lots of laughter.  Lots of questions and a few dad jokes thrown in. Happy Father's Day to any men out there listening!

The most efficient episode we have ever done. It's the definition of short and sweet. This is an episode designed to encourage you as a leow (law enforcement officer wife). Thanks for listening.

Alright, I'm gonna level with you. This isn't gonna be a riveting episode if you are new here. However, for those that have been with us for a while we want to explain where we have been and where we are going. The where turns out to be both literal and figurative as you will find out. As you might expect we have had our fair share of trolls coming out to bully and intimidate. We discuss a specific incident and how we handled it.  As always, thank you for being here. We hope that you feel encouraged after many episodes but at minimum we hope you find community here. 

We have wanted to record an episode with a military wife, well, since we began the podcast. Meet Molly. There aren't many people who can understand law enforcement life with the exception of a military wife and vice versa. No, they are not the exact same. However, we wanted to ask some questions that would help us to learn from a military wife.  This is a great episode to kick off our first episode of 2021. 

After a discouraging year, we hope this podcast episode will encourage you. We are continuing with just the two of us today. It's a conversation between our heads and hearts. Sometimes the things we know to be true in our head haven't quite convinced our hearts. We talk about forgiveness and what that can look like especially when you need to forgive someone who hasn't asked for forgiveness. Nothing in this episode is profound but we are just two normal girls trying to figure things out and sharing that journey. We hope you can relate.  Thank you to all of you who have found us on social media. We are still taking a social media break for the holidays but head over to Instagram and give bluewifelifepodcast a follow. 

It's just us again talking today about academy. Not our experience actually in it. No. No. No. This is from the perspective of sending your loved one away for months on end. This is our experience on that end of things. Mary has a much better memory than I do and is a wealth of information from this time in her life. We hope everyone enjoys this shorter more upbeat episode than our last few heavier topics. However, if you know someone that is about to send their loved one to an academy this might be a helpful source of information for them. 

For the second episode in a row it's just us. Tune in for what it's like on one of our phone calls. A "phone call" that comes on the heels of the two LAPD officers ambushed while sitting in their patrol car. While you may not find much wisdom in this episode, maybe it will simply ring as relatable. Enjoy , it's another short one. 

No we will not be talking about covid or masks or killer hornets or whatever craziness the world is happening in the world. However, we will be sharing our personal thoughts on what this summer was like to be in a law enforcement family. We've felt lots of emotions but manage to keep cool, calm and collected for this episode. We also share our thoughts on the best ways to have an honest discussion with someone who thinks differently than you. This might be the shortest interview we've ever done so you can knock it out in one sitting.  Don't forget to sign up for Run for The Badge 5k October 10th. Check out our Instagram highlight section for more details @bluewifelifepodcast    

Let's talk qualified immunity. Let's talk no knock warrants. We even talk LA riots from the early 90's. Let's talk about about what America is talking about with a retired black law enforcement officer who isn't shy in his opinions. We are excited to introduce you to Hugh Coleman today. If you are not in law enforcement, maybe this will help give you perspective. If you are a leow, this may help you articulate what some of you have been feeling. We are putting this out raw and hardly edited. No music. No intro. We hope you enjoy listening and learn something new. This is another long so break it up but listen all the way through. 

Today we chat with Autumn Clifford or otherwise known as "Officer Autumn" on her popular Instagram account. She is a police wife, former police officer, life coach, and now podcast host. She has devoted her life to changing the culture of law enforcement officers and how their mental health is dealt with at work and at home. She is very passionate about helping men and women fight against demons that can often times creep up and cause suicidal thoughts.  Suicide among officers is rising and Autumn is determined to help fight that battle. We talk about how we as wives can help, but also how as a society we can re train our brains on mental health and reach out when we see someone that might be struggling. This is an important issue and we appreciate you listening.

We started a conversation about race. A 2.5 hour conversation and really we've just scratched the surface. We wanted to take this conversation out of memes and boxes and have it amongst four real women. Let us introduce you to Janei and Phebe, two black law enforcement officer wives who sit down with us to talk to us about race relations today. And yes, this interview is long (our longest ever) but we didn't want to edit it down and cut out anything that you might feel is worth listening to. Our ultimate hope is that you will also have these conversations in real life too. We hope you enjoy it. 

Had enough doom and gloom for one day/year? Yeah, us too. This was a light and fun conversation with Liz Nelson or known on Instagram as @lizdiane. She is a champion of women, small business, nurses everywhere and queen of skincare #botoxbaby.  She is representin' for the fire wives out there who are patiently waiting for another fire wife interview! And because we are Ft. Worth girls we had to talk a little rodeo. It's practically a holiday in our neck of the woods. Liz chats about fire wife life, supporting small businesses and we only asked her about a thousand questions about botox so theres that! You will love Liz! She is so well spoken and just a kind soul that wants to help make this world a sweeter place!!!

Police Wife, Coach and host of the podcast "Feel Amazing Naked" are just a few of the titles that Amanda Walker wears. Today we talk to her about self-care which can be a highly stretched term these days. Have you ever assessed what taking care of yourself looks like? Have you ever wanted to "feel amazing naked?" If you say no, you are a liar! ;)  Let's talk about it in today's episode. 

If you are anything like us you keep hearing this name pop up amongst people in the law enforcement world. Adam Davis Adam Davis Adam Davis. He is the author of Bulletproof Marriage, a devotional for first responder and military families. While we set out to talk about his book, which is worth a read (or two), we ended up talking a lot about Adam's life story. He has an incredible story of finding comfort and purpose in Christ. He is honest and real and completely transformed by one encounter with God in his squad car. This might be one you listen to with your significant other.

Many of you know our guest today or at least you know her memes. Today we interview the person behind all those uplifting memes that get shared thousands of times. We talk about her personal life and how ammo and grace writer for IG turned her into a full fledged author. She talks about her faith and the huge role that plays in her life. 

This is likely the shortest interview we have ever done or ever will do! We wanted to put out in interview that directly speaks to the anxieties many are facing at this moment. We kept it short and concise. We interview a licensed professional counselor who provides coping skills for these anxieties. If you have felt tensions rising within yourself or others take a listen. 

What does it look like to work with your spouse? What is like to be the first point of contact for people in need of help after calling 911? This is the life of a dispatcher and for this episode more specifically "Dispatcher Kristen." We interview Kristen who enlightens us (we really knew very little about dispatch life before this). She is the mom of three girls balancing motherhood, blue wife life and work. She puts it all out there on Instagram as @dispatcherkristen.

When you need a virtual best friend, listen here. When you want to know that you have a community of people that understand your world, listen here. We are proud to back the blue and we know you are too. We are a interview style show dedicated to encouraging women through stories and the advice of experts in their fields. Thank you for stopping by. 

Bonus Episode! Friendship ladies. It's all about friendship and what that looks like as an adult. We chose to interview these two long time best friends behind the blog and account, Style Duplicated. We've been drawn to these two and their chemistry online for a long time and I think you will find it translates in this episode as well. If this interview is done right, you will feel like you are in the room with us, sitting down with a glass of wine and chatting like old friends. As best friends ourselves, it was fun to interview these two and discover what they think makes their own friendship work. We tested their friendship with a lightning round game of questions. They are moms to seven kids between them and represent fashion, interiors, beauty and life. If you laugh when listening to other people laugh then go ahead and tune in now.    www.styleduplicated.com @styleduplicated 

We are giddy to talk with Style and Fashion influencer Courtney Kerr today. We are taking a break from our typical topics that have to deal more with law enforcement wife life and talking about something that's just really fun for us to explore. This is a bonus episode and a conversation with someone we really love to follow on social media. Courtney is nothing short of hilarious and looks cute while making us all laugh. She is a fashion and beauty influencer and owner of Kerrently.com. You might remember Courtney from her two reality shows, Most Eligible Dallas and Courtney Loves Dallas. We talked with Courtney about fall trends in fashion and what staple items we need in our closet. Plus, what to splurge on with make up and what to go cheap on. She was hilarious when telling us what drove her nuts about being in airports. And we played a fun lightning game of get to know you questions. Courtney also gave us tips when shopping on Amazon. She told us how to decipher between the clothing items on amazon that are worth buying and the ones to look out for that aren't that great. Talking with Courtney did not feel like talking to a Instagram influencer, it felt like talking to an old friend. Except an old friend who looks dang good, and were over here like "wheres my lip gloss?" Just kidding... Courtney was adorable and we know you'll love this episode.  Show notes: kerrently.com Shop Bop Courtney's favorite items on amazon Search on Instagram: #founditonamazon

Today we talk about a lot of things! What we loved about season 2 and what our game plan is going forward with season 3. Listen to hear some funny stories, behind the scenes tidbits, and how we feel about being cohosts of a podcast! 

Today, we bring you part two of the interview with our husbands, the men behind Blue Wife Life. This section of the interview we talk with Scott and Stephen about marriage. We wanted to get a male perspective from a law enforcement officer on what men actually want and need in a healthy relationship. Scott and Stephen were part funny, part sweet and all honest when we asked them questions about our relationships. We wanted to hear from them and get their opinions to help other women maybe somewhat understand their husband a little better. Obviously, they do not represent all men and or specifically men in law enforcement, but its a good insight into what might go on inside your husbands head. Buckle up people because they continue with their sarcastic one liners in this episode sprinkled in with some sweet comments as well. Moms, listen with ear buds in today. Lets just say we have "adult" conversations about marriage and hope that none of our parents are listening! :)

Today we introduce you to our husbands. They get exactly thirty minutes to leave a good impression. So we have properly threatened them to be on their best behavior. However, it didn't work....as you will soon see. In part one of this two part interview we ask questions that as blue wives you might find interesting to hear from another law enforcement officer. We talk a lot about their experiences as law enforcement officers and how that effects the whole family. Also, today we celebrate one year since Blue Wife Life has launched. That's right! Happy birthday to us! Thank you for your support. 

Ten years ago Flight went down shortly after taking off. With nowhere to go the Pilots were forced to land in the icy cold waters of the Hudson River. The 155 people on board were forced to flee to the rafts or plane wings while wondering and waiting if they would be rescued. Our interviewee today, Karin was onboard that day and recounts what happened from the inside. What’s it like to live through such a frightening ordeal? This is a story with a happy ending and a surprisingly upbeat episode! 

Let us introduce you to licensed professional counselor and sex therapist, Nancy Houston. How does one decide to become a sex therapist? She explains how her career began and the importance of a healthy sex life. Nancy wrote a book called, “Love and Sex,” which we will link below.  We talk about connecting within your relationship and true intimacy. We were able to ask many questions all about, well you guessed it, SEX. It’s an honest conversation and we learned so much. While this conversation is healthy and fun, we would advise listening to it away from kids. Also to our parents and in-laws we advise you sit this episode out. Everyone else, enjoy!  https://www.amazon.com/Love-Sex-Christian-Healthy-Intimacy/dp/1621576752/ref=nodl_      

On this episode we speak with Zanna Wolfgang of Honor The Brave, an organization that is committed to giving back to first responder and military families through realty. However, it wasn't always this way. Zanna's husband Jeff was a police officer who was injured in the line of duty. For years he tried to rehab himself to full health and eventually was forced to retire. Today Zanna shares how she and Jeff have taken this turn of events and stayed connected with the first responder and military families they are so passionate about. 

We are beyond excited to introduce you to our guest for this episode, Cheryl Scruggs. Cheryl is Wife to Jeff, mom to two grown daughters and two son-in-laws, and “Momo” to almost two cute grandkids. Life looks pretty sweet for Cheryl and her family right now, but it hasn’t been without struggles. She shares her story of infidelity that led to the destruction of her marriage, but later that relationship was redeemed and restored. Cheryl and her husband, Jeff, now run a ministry called Hope Matters Marriage ministry. They offer biblical counseling both in person and virtually for couples all over the world. She has her own podcast called Thriving Beyond Belief and even gives us a little glimpse into how she decided to start her podcast. They have written a book called, “I Do Again”. We also chat about raising daughters and what it looks like to help instill self worth into young girls. Cheryl is such an encouragement to all women and offers so much wisdom through what she and her husband have learned in their journey so far. Whether you’ve been married one week or forty years we know you will take something away from this conversation!

It's 2019 in the melting pot that is America. Surely race relations is not still a heavily talked about subject. Except that it is. It still makes national headlines and is still something that can make people uncomfortable to talk about. And this is exactly why we felt that we should talk about it. Today you will meet police officer Jesse, and his wife Jessica. In this conversation we discuss their biracial marriage, how his race has affected his career in law enforcement and personal life. Have times changed or not? Listen in to hear one couples experience. 

In this episode we would like to introduce you to Amber Massey. We are exploring what it's like for other first responder families and today are speaking with a fire wife. What's it like to run a household with five little kids under seven years old on a fireman's schedule? How does she handle the worry that comes with loving a first responder? Amber also gives us a glimpse into what it's like to run a large (and I mean very large) social media account. Ever wonder why some social media accounts are huge and others small? She gives us a peak at what makes her account successful. I will give you a hint: she's authentic. She was blogging back in the pioneer days of blogging. She spent her days documenting her life as a nutritionist and struggling with infertility. She is an interesting account to follow and an interesting person to chat with. Enjoy!

This interview is a special one. We were honored to chat with Brittany Price Brooker. A wife, mom and Christ follower. She is just a gem of a person and has so much wisdom in her young life. Brittany's story starts out like a lot of us... meet your soul mate, get married, have babies. You know the drill. Brittany was a stay at home mom and her husband, Patrick, was in law enforcement. Then, one day it all changed in a moment. Her healthy 30 year old husband died. We talk about her grief, walking through it with God and where her life is today. Brittany loves Jesus and is a great example of trusting the Lord when you feel so completely broken. 

Anxiety is a beast that so many of us wrestle with daily. Being anxious can steal so much joy and happiness from our lives if left untreated.  Today we interview Stacey, a licensed therapist who also happens to be a law enforcement wife. A former police wife and now federal agent wife she knows all about how anxiety can affect the every day life of a LEOW and all people in general. Stacey is knowledgeable, fun spirited and  passionate about her work and helping others. We talk about everything from anxiety within ourselves to how it can creep up in our children's lives too. Chances are you or someone you know suffers from anxiety. The good news is, it is highly treatable. Follow along on instagram and facebook for more information on this weeks episode.

Have you ever wanted something so badly that it hurt? For a lot of women... this happens sometime in the realm of their mid 20s-mid 30s. This burning desire for a baby sets in and it doesn’t let go until those 2 little pink lines show up on a pregnancy test. But... what if those two pink little lines never come? Or what if they come 10 years later? Today, we talk about what it’s like to want a baby so badly and do everything you can to have one, but then realize you’re not in control! Meet Kristie. She is Wife to Seth and mom to FIVE! Before life was full with little people and big messes she experienced the pain of infertility and then the joy of adoption. God had a few other surprises up His sleeve for her and Seth as well! Go listen to hear how God used what seemed like a long line of disappointments to overflowing blessings!

This week we will introduce you to Ashley, who delivered her third child in her 28th week of pregnancy. Ellisyn stopped growing at 23 weeks in utero and when Ashley gave birth she was only 1 lb 9 oz! That's roughly the size of a 20 oz coke bottle! Ellisyn spent the next 72 days in the NICU while Ashley learned how to leave her heart in two different places: at the hospital with her micro-preemie and the other half with her two other kids at home. Motherhood is not for the faint of heart and Ashley is a testament to the strength it takes.  

The journey to motherhood for our friend Kiley started out with tragedy and so much pain. Kiley lost her first born son, Austin at 28 weeks pregnant. She talks about what it was like to have a stillborn and what it was like to say goodbye to her baby. She walks us through her journey to have her beautiful daughter, Emma and what life was like after losing Austin. We also talk about how to help a friend who is experiencing extreme grief. Just a warning that this is not suitable for little ears. 

We all know the cute photos of the moms holding their sweet newborn...everyone’s smiling and happy. It seems as though everything is perfect and while it is in that moment we don’t always see the pain that they went through to have that baby. This interview is different because Our hosts are switching it up. Becky interviews Mary on what it was like for her to experience multiple miscarriages. We know that one in four pregnancies results in miscarriage and our hope is to bring encouragement to those who have experienced the loss of a baby. We also discuss how to help someone who has gone through this loss as well. Our conversation gets a little graphic so just a heads up for mamas with little ears listening. We know that the journey to motherhood isn’t always Instagram worthy and that’s something to be talked about! 

We answer questions from BWL followers about LEOW life, tell behind the scenes of season one and talk about where our podcast is headed in 2019. Thank you all for supporting and listening to us. We appreciate you so much!

Have you ever wondered what it would be like to get into your husband's mind? Well... Today we talk with Dr. Gilberto Salinas, licensed professional counselor, veteran, and a married man. So its kind of like getting into your husbands mind, right? We discuss what marriage is like from the man's prospective. Dr. Salinas really does a great job of breaking down where the man is coming from when he comes home from work and what is going through his mind when the man is stressed. Specifically, men in law enforcement and how we can spot PTSD. All three of us laughed about how women and men are so different in multiple areas in life. Dr. Salinas also gives great practical advice on what we can do on a daily basis to grow healthy marriages. 

Laura Pearce, a police wife was putting her girls down for a nap when she received some of the worst news of her life. Her husband, a Fort Worth police officer, had been shot. Laura walks us through that day and what her life looked like while her husband lay in ICU for nearly 5 weeks. She is strong, brave and a beautiful example of what it means to be a blue wife!

Have you ever had to start over? Maybe that means learning a new city, meeting new friends, starting a new career or maybe all of the above. It can be exhausting and sometimes downright depressing! We speak with Wee Rascals co-founder and federal law enforcement wife, Liz, about how she has tackled all of these things. She tells us how she and her best friend built a company from the ground up. We hope it inspires you today. 

Nineteen years ago, a crazed gunman entered a church and opened fire on a church youth rally filled with teenagers. We interview, Cole, a 16 year old at the time who sat on the front row of the Wedgwood Baptist Church shooting. He shares how his life was impacted that night and how the words of a police officer brought comfort to many in the face of tragedy. 

Allison Uribe is the founder of Wives on Duty, a ministry for law enforcement wives. She began after a dark time in her marriage. Typically law enforcement marriages undergo more stress than the average marriage....and that is saying something! Allison speaks to how God used her personal life to build a ministry with over 14k women today. She talks parenthood when you are a leo family and how she responds to negativity on social media. Allison is the author of two books, Cuffs and Coffee: A Devotional for Wives of America's Law Enforcement, as well as, Because I'm Suitable. Both of her books can be found on amazon. She travels the country speaking at numerous conferences and retreats.