Roses and Thorns

Our "short" episode is still 50 minutes. You're welcome. We're planning to take a hiatus due to time restrictions. We're hoping to be back later, but we'll have to just wait and see what the future holds!

Not only did the previous week not end of a rose ceremony, they didn't even finish all the dates last week! And they didn't even show us who got the group date rose! Are they trying to make us lose our minds?

Why are we still talking about shrimp? Does it matter if Elizabeth was in the hot tub? Is Clayton actually a gold retriever that morphed into a human? Seriously, who was that family? Did anyone consider flag football instead? When will Serene get her date? Why don't more cities utilize the space next to their rivers? All this and more on this week's episode!

Questions that we have after this episode: - What exactly did Cassidy think Clayton was going to talk to her about? - What is Shanae's endgame? - Why were there so few shrimp in the first place? - WHAT IS SHANAE'S ENDGAME??

Two villains emerge this week, but one definitely sucks worse than the other.

Was this the most dramatic night one ever? Probably not, but it did keep me on my toes.

Join our Bachelor league for Clayton's season! https://app.bachbracket.com/league/512   The new season begins Monday, January 3.

Welcome to this special quiet edition of Roses and Thorns. Listen as we attempt to record an episode without waking up my 3 year old niece who was sleeping upstairs. Were we successful? Listen and find out!

Ok, we did NOT see this ending coming! We're still reeling from watching what we were sure was going to be the next great Bachelor Nation romance just shatter before our very eyes.

It's the moment no one has been waiting for, the Men Tell All! It's chock full of gimmicks and little to no accountability!

Honestly, this was just a lovely hometowns week. 

In this episode, Ryan and Kelly struggle to remember what happened last Tuesday on The Bachelorette despite their several pages of notes.

This episode is brought to you by the letter S.

Sometimes it feels like the hardest part of making this podcast is coming up with titles and descriptions.

There were so many things in this episode that we did not see coming. When did Brandon start looking grown-up? When did we start liking Martin? Why did Jamie REFERENCE THE AUDIENCE?! So many questions.

Today's episode brought to you by canned margarita!

It's Michelle's night one, and she is stunning. The budget is clearly higher for this season of The Bachelorette than it was for the last two seasons, but the large staircase makes for some awkward quiet moments. To get ahead of ourselves on this, CORRECTION CORNER: Ryan was not the host of a Bachelor Live on Stage but what THE BACHELOR for a Bachelor Live on Stage!! Join our fantasy bracket: https://bachelorette.bachbracket.com/leagues/168608

We're baaaaaaack!!! And we're a little out of practice, but we're nonetheless excited to recap Michelle's journey on the upcoming season of The Bachelorette (premieres Tuesday, October 19).   Join our Bach Bracket league! Guess who's going to get roses each week at https://bachelorette.bachbracket.com/leagues/168608

Since we didn't recap this season week-by-week, we decided to do the whole season all at once! We give our overall impressions of the season, as well as discussing the big moments (that we remember).

We unfortunately won't be able to recap Katie's season, but we did go through the cast bios for the men on her season! There are an alarming number of people describing what kind of lover they are...

Ok, how is our recap of this episode longer than our finale recap?

It's finally the finale! After weeks of torture and nonsense, we've reached the finish line (sort of).

It's Fantasy Suites, which means there's only one week left! We've almost made it!

Honestly, I didn't hate this Tell All. There was very little yelling or arguing and also very little Chris Harrison. 

Would you believe it if I told you that it's hometowns week already??

It's the week before hometowns, and no one is playing around. Over the course of this episode, we go from 11 women to just 4, and there were some eliminations that we really did not see coming.

There's a lot of calls for accountability in Bachelor Nation right now, from Chris Harrison, to Rachael Kirkconnell, to previous cast on the Bachelor. If you're not sure what it's all about, have a listen! We try to break it down to explain the what and the why.   If you would like to have a conversation about anything we discuss in this episode, please reach out to us! @rosesnthornspod

With very little news to discuss, we get pretty quickly to business. We have a fairly in-depth discussion about what we saw with Serena C and Katie, as well as the conversations that others are having about this drama. Is Serena C a mean girl? A bully? Or just someone venting?   Reminder: We're flawed human beings, and we're always open to other perspectives! If you feel that we've said something problematic, we would love to have a conversation with you about it! Please reach out to us on Twitter or Insagram @rosesnthornspod

These recap episodes just keep getting longer and longer... Sorry?

The house is basically just a bunch of mean girls now. Everyone sucks, and everyone's upset. Except Michelle. She's perfect, and all we want is for her to live happily ever after with Matt. Heads up, this is a long episode. If you want to skip the news section, jump ahead to about 40 minutes.

Kelly gets progressively more annoyed with Sarah throughout the recording of this episode (whether fair or not, idk). But really, no one's the hero, no one's the villain. 

Look. I don't know what was going on with our brains tonight, but we were *struggling* with words and sentences. I'm gonna guess some mix of pandemic + insurrection has fogged up our minds, but hey, we made it through... It just took 2 hours to do so. Anyway, now that we've talked this episode up, listen in!

Welcome to Matt James' season, y'all! We talk about our new lead, the few intros we get for the women, all of the limo arrivals, the vibrator, the controversial prayer, Matt's one-on-one time with the ladies, drama brewing, and our best attempt to discuss disabilities as two able-bodied people. (Feel free to message us and let us know what we could have said differently!)

The new season of The Bachelor starts on Monday, January 4, and we've got a run-down of the 32 ladies we'll see on night one! We've got not only the general demographics of the women, but their likes and dislikes, and our feeble attempts at describing their appearances. Listen in!

We've finally caught up on the finale of The Bachelorette! I'm not sure what else you need in this description. This seems pretty self-explanatory, so I feel like you can stop reading this and just listen to the episode, ok?

This is our "quiet" episode, which means we intended to stay quieter than usual but no way actually succeeded in doing so. Either way, fantasy suites happened! And we recap them! Enjoy!

In the history of the Bachelor/ette, has there ever been a better final four? Have there ever been more joyful and positive hometowns?

Finishing off last week's dates, Blake gets his one-on-one (and as far as we've seen, this might as well be his only interaction ever with Tayshia). Then it moves on the rose ceremony where, surprise, Bennett's back! (Am I the only one who forgot about him??) Then we get the Men Tell All, which should really just be titled "The Men Tell The Same Drama We Already Watched But With More Yelling."

So here's the thing, Kelly messes up Riley's name a bunch of times in this episode. I mean, clearly she knows his name is Riley, but all the other components got jumbled. She maybe gets it right in the end though? ...  Anyway, so aside from that, it's basically everything you expect the episode will be: Bennett and Noah, one-on-one with Ben, group date, and surprise Bennett. Enjoy!

Look, these guys are some grown ass men. We've got real conversations happening and true vulnerability. It's honestly incredible to see such real conversations happening on this show, and we can only hope that this is a new trend for the show. (But like, it's still The Bachelor franchise, so probably not...)

This episode is a long one because we've got thoughts about it, especially the Tayshia and Ivan talk that will undoubtedly go down in Bachelor Nation history. 

Since the producers of The Bachelorette can't seem to figure out how to fit a group data, a one-on-one, another group date, and a rose ceremony into a single episode, we pick up on the second group date of Tayshia's first full week with these men.

It's all finally happening -- Tayshia's the Bachelorette, Biden's going to be president. For this brief moment, everything feels little bit more ok in the world...

Look, I just don't know how to describe this episode besides complete and utter lunacy. It's just one wild moment or statement after the next.

From Yosef accidentally sending an explicit snap to the wrong person to our theories on how the Clare/Dale relationship got where it, we cover it all! 

Look, we don't normally have butt-related titles, but when it's appropriate... In this episode, we get into #promgate, Clare's ability to ruin an evening, Jason's therapy session, consent in nudity, and our surprising new opinion of Bennett. Well, and of course, the etymology of butthole.

The long-awaiting Bachelorette premiere is finally here! Clare's got 31 men who seemingly all have real jobs and are willing to spend 2 weeks in solitary confinement in order to date her, which means they have dedication and patience. Listen as we recap the limo entrances and first night conversations, and as Kelly get real worked up about that butt in a box...

It's FINALLY almost time for this quarantined season of The Bachelorette! We've got a sneak peek of the men to expect on Clare's season (and Tayshia? right??), starting Tuesday, October 13!

We did it! We made it through Jason Mesnick's season AND BEYOND. Take an adventure with us through the absolutely zonkatronic wedding episode where we visit the most romantic place on Earth (hint: it's in Las Vegas) and Bachelor producers refuse to acknowledge weather exists! Plus we get updates on Stephanie, Jillian, Melissa, Jason and Molly. Buckle in!

Melissa definitely knew that this was going to happen, but did Molly? We may never know.

It's the finale! Jason finally chooses the wrong person to propose to.