The Grief to Growth Podcast

Episode 11 | The Struggle is Real with Dale Oquist In this episode, we interview Pastor Dale Oquist, Lead Pastor of Peoples Church in Fresno, CA. He shares his journey of multiple losses in this past year and talks about: The Rhythms of Life Embracing the Struggle Showing Gratitude Website: Grief to GrowthCheck out our new online courses available now! #parentloss#friendloss#multipleloss

Traditions | Honoring Old and Embracing New Navigating the Holidays while walking through grief and loss can be very challenging. When it comes to traditions, it can bring on a variety of emotions. Matt and Kari talk about their experiences of traditions through the first holidays following loss and also give several keys to managing this time well.Keys to honoring old and embracing new traditions during the holidays: Be Intentional - Make a plan Be engaged Don't Overlook the Small Things It doesn't have to be perfect It doesn't have to be permanent Make it personal Make it positive Links: Grief to Growth

Collin Crain is the oldest son of Kari Perkins and serves as the Student Ministries Pastor at Northpointe Community Church in Fresno, California. 1. Collin's journey of loss 2. Feelings and Emotions following the loss of his father 3. Ways to walk with someone who is grieving: a. Love and accept without expectations b. Don't try and “have a moment” when all that is really needed is to just hang out c. Find better questions to ask than just “how are you doing?” 4. “I miss what could have been, but I'm grateful for what is!” 5. A celebration of life is more than just a funeral or an event…it is how you honor those you lost when a memory comes to mind. Links: Grief to Growth

The Rise of Broken Heart Syndrome What are the things that are adding “noise” to your life? Are you adding extra stress to your life by being a “people pleaser”? What is the outside pressure that you just have to learn to manage? What are things that you have taken on but don't have the margin for? 2 Corinthians 10:5 “…and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.” Philippians 4:7-8 “And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.” Observations: What thoughts are getting your attention? Are they productive? How can you find balance in your daily life? Your balance and someone else's aren't necessarily the same. When you start the day off with intention, you can manage the unplanned parts of the day better! Links: Cedars-Sinai Grief to Growth

The Day I Was Mad At God | Breanna Hardy Breanna Hardy shares her story of the loss of her mom at age 19 and how she dealt with anger. Daughter of Matt and "Bonus Daughter" of Kari, she gives a unique perspective on dealing with anger following loss. This episode references her article, "The Day I Was Mad At God." https://www.grieftogrowth.org/blog/the-day-i-was-mad-at-god Here are some of her thoughts on dealing with anger: 1. It's okay to be mad at God...He can take it. "It's when we soak in our sorrow, wallow in self-pity, and remain in bitterness that we actually shut God out, making the problem far worse than it already is." “ We can often confuse disappointment and fallout from people with God. Cancer let me down, but God never has.” 2. Remind yourself of who God is. 3. Acknowledge that your heart doesn't line up with your head."Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything." James 1:2-4 4. Make time each day to express your gratitude to God “This is what the Lord says: Cursed is the one who trusts in man, who depends on flesh for his strength and whose heart turns away from the Lord. He will be like a bush in the wastelands; he will not see prosperity when it comes. He will dwell in the parched places of the desert, in a salt land where no one lives. But blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord, whose confidence is in him. He will be like a tree planted by the water that sends out its roots by the stream. It does not fear when heat comes; its leaves are always green. It has no worries in a year of drought and never fails to bear fruit.” – Jeremiah 17:5-8

Laura Figueroa shares her powerful testimony of trusting God during the loss of two of her siblings within a 7 month period. She also shares the comfort and healing that she has found in songwriting during the grief process and is now helping others do the same. “The righteous cry out, and the Lord hears them;
he delivers them from all their troubles.
The Lord is close to the brokenhearted
and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” Psalm 34:17-18 “The Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away; Blessed be the name of the Lord.” Job 1:21 "In those darkest times, I felt the closest to God." IG: @lauraafigueroa#grief #growth #siblingloss #hope #songwriting

Episode 005 - Is Denial Always A Bad Thing?What is Denial? Denial is a type of defense mechanism that involves ignoring the reality of a situation to avoid anxiety. Defense mechanisms are strategies that people use to cope with distressing feelings. In the case of denial, it can involve not acknowledging reality or denying the consequences of that reality.5 Stages of Grief - Elisabeth Kübler-Ross1. Denial is NOT always a bad thing (in the short term)2. Surround yourself with people that can recognize your patterns and issues.3. Be Intentional - Prioritize your journey of loss and healingWays to be intentional... Laugh often Get enough sleep Journaling Grief to Growth Journal (available at grieftogrowth.org) Don't Grieve Alone! How to help someone in denial... Be Present! "Don't opt for absence because you feel ill-equipped."Recent Episodes mentioned on this podcast: Episode 2 - The Ripple Effect of Grief (Kari's story) Episode 4 - Grieving in Faith (with John Brockman)

We are honored to have John Brockman share his and his wife, Joslyn's story of loss and how they have experienced growth in the process. Psalm 34:18 "The Lord is near to the brokenhearted..." What do you do when you're in the moment that is your worst fear? "Sometimes the world wants to fix you and they can't...so they suppress you." What does it say about your faith if you just give up when you don't get what you want? John and Joslyn Brockman http://johnandjoslyn.com Grief to Growth http://grieftogrowth.org #grief #growth #loss #trysomy18 #hope #faith

Inviting God into your Emotions | Matt Perkins' story of loss Ministry BackgroundMinistry and the move to California When life took a turn...hearing those words...you have cancer...Psalm 112:7 
“They do not fear bad news; they confidently trust the Lord to care for them.” • “It's going to be okay…” • I guess ‘God's okay' and ‘MY okay' don't have to be the same • When I can't see the way, I know that God can make a way. • It's difficult and dangerous to walk alone. • There is power in your vulnerability • Invite God into your emotions! Grief to Growth Website: grieftogrowth.org Podcast: https://www.grieftogrowth.org/podcasts/the-grief-to-growth-podcast Email: hello@grieftogrowth.org Resource: The Grief to Growth Journal (available for purchase at grieftogrowth.org)

This week, Kari Perkins shares her story about the loss of her husband, Pastor Eddie Crain, Children's Pastor of Northpointe Community Church in Fresno, California. We can look at loss and think that it only impacts one person or one family. In the case of Eddie, because of his ministry role at the church, he had a far-reaching impact on children, as well as their parents. Grief has a ripple effect. Disenfranchised grief is when someone experiences a loss but others (and maybe even themselves), do not acknowledge the importance of the loss in their life. Grief to Growth Website: http://www.grieftogrowth.org Podcast https://www.grieftogrowth.org/podcasts/the-grief-to-growth-podcast Do you have a question or comment for Matt and Kari Perkins? Email us at: hello@grieftogrowth.org

Welcome to the Grief to Growth Podcast. Our goal is to help those impacted by loss to process their grief, gain perspective, and then move forward with purpose. Receive our free ebook, "Managing Grief with Grace" by going to http://grieftogrowth.org/podcast.