Gourmet Garbage

Life ain't easy right now, and we've had a few bumps in the road at Gourmet Garbage Towers in the last couple of weeks. So we've taken the opportunity to bring you another candid conversation in the form of a bonus episode, while we get all of our ducks in a row for the three-part season finale! Laugh, cry, and whinge about the world with us. And do listen to the whole thing for what really is the best way to end an epsiode.

We said we'd never do it again, but here we are, doing it again! It's a massively stressful week here at Gourmet Garbage headquarters, with Josh sitting his residency test for the UK and Ellie having a huge job interview lined up. And there isn't a chance in hell we could give a full episode the attention it deserves. I mean, look at the title of this episode. Massively low effort. Still, here's a truncated episode where we chat life, lockdown, Halloween, true crime and Borat. A truly varied discussion. Bon appetit!

California. Sun, sand, and stunning servers at SUR Lounge. This week, we're diving into the hugely popular Bravo series Vanderpump Rules, which sees some of the best looking hospitality workers in Los Angeles party with each other, bicker with each other, and do each other, all under the watchful eye of proprietor Lisa Vanderpump of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills fame. Because it's such a high-energy show, we pair it with a high-flavour meal of balsamic mushroom spaghetti and spinach, which meets a mixed response. Prepare for horror, hilarity and halitosis as we discuss such stars as Stassi Schroeder, Kristen Doute, Jax Taylor, Scheana Shay, Brittany Cartwright, Tom Sandoval, Tom Schwartz and Ariana Madix.

This week we're not cooking, and we're not watching any specific reality TV show. Instead, we're drinking orange peel martinis and chatting about life, lockdown, listener feedback, and general reality TV news, including the tragic confirmation that Keeping Up With The Kardashians is coming to an end, the firing of Teddi Mellencamp from The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, the conflicting Paris Hilton autobiographical documentary This Is Paris, and whether Come Dine With Me narrator Dave Lamb really is the peak of British comedy. Also featuring our good friend and TV lover Celia Carbajosa, who brings a certain worldly flair with her love for such cultural institutions as Love Island and Nando's.

This week, we return to Josh's homeland to catch up with Bravo's antipodean series The Real Housewives of Auckland. Rather surprisingly, for a show about New Zealanders that only aired for one season, it might just be the cattiest Housewives series that's been produced. Specifically, we're focusing on episode nine of season 1, 'Launch Off', which sees Angela and Gilda launch two very different books with two very different parties. And because we're heading back to Josh's hometown, we're pairing it with a Kiwi comfort meal of curried sausages with reduced cream mashed potato. Featuring all the housewives of Auckland, including Anne Batley Burton, Angela Stone, Gilda Kirkpatrick, Julia Sloane, Louise Wallace and Michelle Blanchard. See the full recipe for curried sausages and reduced cream mashed potatoes here.

This week there's no Ellie. She's bedridden with a cannula, and so can't use her right arm, which means she's completely unable to talk into a microphone. But, to whet your Gourmet Garbage whistle, Josh is here with a bonus episode, featuring our newest fan, 'Big Ed' of TLC's 90 Day Fiance: Before the 90 Days!

This week, Josh is taking the back seat while Ellie cooks. And since the weather has turned colder, what better thing to make than a nice, cold Spanish soup? It's tomatoey, it's bready, it's quite filling, and it's an original family recipe for 'salmorejo'. We pair it with the latest - still ongoing - season of Below Deck Mediterranean, namely the most recent few episodes, and get into an emotional and heavy discussion about drugs, maritime law, and how not to fire a chef. Find the recipe for the salmorejo we made here.

Is love truly blind? Do your tastebuds work properly when you're blind? How many bowls can Josh use in cooking a four-course meal? This week, we look at the uber-popular lockdown love story that was Love is Blind from Netflix, starting from the first episode where the men and women begin dating 'blind' in their isolation pods. We watch right through to the infamous episode 6 of the first season, in which Jessica shows us what not to do with your dog. To pair, Josh cooks a four-course tasting menu including grilled beetroot, wild mushroom soup, black pudding-stuffed pork shoulder, and chocolate mocha cream, and Ellie eats it 'blind' with an eye cover on. Featuring the couples Mark and Jessica, Amber and Barnett, Kelly and Kenny, Cameron and Lauren, and Giannina and Damien. Find the recipe for this four-course tasting menu here.

This week we take a deep dive into the wild world of TLC's massively popular franchise 90 Day Fiancé; specifically, season 4 of the much grittier spin-off series 90 Day Fiancé: Before the 90 Days, which follows Americans travelling the world to meet who they hope will be the love of their lives, having only communicated with them online and never meeting them in person. We pair it with the Russian cold summer soup окро́шка, or okróshka, which turns out to be an unmitigated disaster in the kitchen, and we cannot recommend making it. Featuring such meme-famous couples as Big Ed and Rosemarie, Yolanda and Williams, Avery and Ash, Geoffrey and Varya, Lisa and Usman, Stephanie and Erika, David and Lana, and Darcey and Tom. Find the recipe for okróshka here.

This week we go a few seasons further with The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, and join them for an emotional rollercoaster of a trip to Amsterdam, watching episodes 15 and 16 of season 5. Because we're in a bit of a Dutch mood, we pair our evening of garbage television with some quick beef Bitterballen - a fried, doughy, meaty bar snack from the Netherlands - and a side of ‘Huzarensalade' - a Hungarian-style Dutch potato salad. Find the recipe for Bitterballen and Huzarensalade here.

A spicy beef burger meets a spicy episode of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. This week we watch the infamous game night episode - season 2, episode 6 - which starts with a game night, and ends with some seriously explosive drama, and pair it with an Asian-inspired sriracha beef burger. There's also a couple of homemade hash browns thrown in for good measure. Find the recipe for the Asia-inspired beef burgers and homemade hash browns here.

Sun. Real estate. Bread. Salad. This week, we take the first episode of Netflix's 2019 series 'Selling Sunset', which looks at the goings on of Los Angeles high-end realtors The Oppenheim Group, and pair it with a Tuscan-style 'panzanella', or bread salad, for that perfect SoCal meal. Find the recipe for Tuscan bread salad here.

'Below Deck' is a Bravo reality TV show that's all about luxury megayachts and the characters who staff them, catering to a wealthy charter guest's every need. Beef bourguignon is an ancient French dish, considered by many to be a bit of an old school way to prepare beef. This week, we've made a very easy version of beef bourguignon and paired it with what might be the most shocking episode of Below Deck - season 6, episode 10, ‘Man Overboard'. Find the recipe for an easy beef bourguignon here.

We're Josh and Ellie, and we love both good food and garbage television. So much, that we're pairing some of our favourite recipes with the most garbage reality television, reviewing both the food and our favourite episodes, and recording it for the world to hear. Because clearly that's what you need right now. We'd love for you to join us! Regular episodes start 15 July 2020.