Late Night Thoughts With Me Myself And I

I don't even know

I feel like we say to ourselves 'enjoy life' and then go ahead and put stress in the fact that we should be enjoying life that we forget to enjoy it all.

Life cannot be rushed. You'll realise that you've missed the smile on the babies face, or the extra foam on top of your coffee because of the barista in the cafe. You'll miss the melody the guitarist created or the way your friend turned to hug you. You'll miss it all and regret that you didn't slow down. So be patient, with people, events and life in general.

I feel as though when things get hard and we are going through a hard time, no matter how many people we know and how many people we are close too, we tend to keep it all inside. And all the stuff we bottle up inside gathers and gathers until it bursts. But a way to stop that is talking. So talk to others let them know what is happening. And no you are not annoying nor a burden, you are simply a person, a human.

There's always a different happiness present when you share your story, your success and your passion with others.

As much as I go on about routine and habits, sometimes it's okay to break them for a greater good. But it's up to you to make that choice.

We all have a purpose and we all have our own goals. But life is busy and things move at a fast pace. Sometimes it's worth taking a break and rectifying your intention and reminding yourself of your own final destination.

June's gone and July's here. Woww, passed half way !

Today was a good day, besides the constant overthinking. Today was a good day.

I feel as though sometimes we fall down such a big and deep spiral that we forget to be aware of all that is around us.

We should all try and understand one another. We all try and know our academic knowledge and our future success yet amongst all that we forget to understand the people around us.

Sometimes the things we do don't need to bring us some sort of benefit. Sometimes we should do things just because.

Success is not a one time thing. We can't expect ourselves to be masters of everything on our first try. We have to make mistakes and experience smaller achievements, before we can understand the overall success we have achieved.

There is no harm in asking. Life throws towards us so many opportunities and events where we can thrive and show the world who we are. But there are also many times were we may miss a certain golden opportunity simply because we were too afraid to ask. How do I do this ? Where is that and what time ? Ask, and continue to ask, who knows where the asking may take you. However I also believe that we shouldn't always question. As to me there's a difference in the two. The first asking being out of curiosity and the second, questioning can both be out of great respect and the need to clarify or also to mock. What do you think?

There is a wisdom and sense of maturity that comes with each of us when we are with peace. The world, what we do and the people with us are all chaotic and I wouldn't change s thing about it, but sometimes a bit of peace is what we need.

Nothing is ever easy, especially when it means something to you, then it seems like it's 10x harder. But the worse thing to do to yourself after facing something you've never faced before or doing something that scares you is being harsh on yourself. You don't deserve that. Be kind and understanding, just like how you treat a friend.

Giving back is something I think we all should do. There a different kind of happiness one gets when you've made someone else's day by giving something back to the world. Give back and see how many doors the world opens for you.

Appreciate it all. From the materialistic goods to the people around you. Appreciate it all. You never know just how much your words may mean to someone, so tell them and say with such a passion that they can't question your appreciation.

A rest day, and unproductive day, a bad day. They don't define you.

Short and simple - don't let past choices hold you back. Your future is waiting.

Whether you woke up and decided to have a stay in bed kind of day or you decided to face your demons - give yourself credit. Give yourself credit for all you have done.

Though we can't control what the universe throws at us, we can control how we approach that something and how we leave that something. Not everything is in our control, but what is in our control we should try and make the best of.

There are moments in life where there are so many things happening and so many feelings that you are trying to comprehend, that you can only get such a rush when it all happens together. However as soon as you are unable to understand and comprehend the information and emotions around you, that's when your brain starts to shut down and you stop seeing the beauty in the way things may be done. So let things speed up but allow your mind to slow down and take each experiance for what it is.

Surround yourself with people who genuinely care about you and have only the clearest and best intentions for you. No secret agenda ! Make sure you don't let yourself worry about people who are not worth the time. Recognise your worth.

I love helping others, that feeling that you get, it's indescribable, but it's amazing. But as much as one loves helping everyone and anyone, should you help if your own happiness is at cost or can you always go halfway ?

Being able to make a choice is such an amazing ability to have. But also understanding you don't have to say yes all the time is a good thing to acknowledge too. Make a choice for you, because they all have an impact, even if the impact is the smallest impact one could have.

How do you know that what your chasing after is right and for you ? The truth is you don't know that its right. You only know that you feel happy and good about what your going after.

As much as I panic and worry about doing things that I'm unsure about, I do still believe that one can learn alot from just throwing themselves in there.

Have faith and hope, but I dont think it should ever be blind faith. You can't have faith and expect it all to be fine and dandy having done no work alongside it. You should try hard and put in the work and when partnered with faith that is when you hope things work and with all that, even if things go alittle off track, know that its always for the best as you did try. Maybe something better is around the corner for you.

There comes a time where you have to learn to hold your own fort. Whether you've been bought up in a world where you are well shielded or not, this is a skill I think is needed. Learn to hold your own and alongside learn to be accountable for yourself too. You can make your future as you please.

I think okay is a word we use just like fine that has lost its meaning over time. But as much as we say okay, as people, about ourselves we don't really let things be just okay. When in reality okay is sometimes great in that position. You juts don't know it. Things don't have to be grade A all the time and OKAY is good.

We all have our own final destinations and goals that we want to reach, but no two peoples journey and pathway will be the same. We can't expect it to the same because if that was the case then we'd all be doing everything, however difficulty within a journey doesn't mean change your final destination. It means hold on and carry on but keep your eyes open for new paths in-between. For you never know where a hidden path for you may be.

It's so odd to see the difference in what we choose, between varying ages. I went out today and to see how those younger are more likely to pick whatever, compared to the methodical approach an older person may make is quite funny to be fair. But then again, it's all good to have a variety of things to pick from, but when we have too many things to choose from too, we are less likely to make a choice we like. Do you agree ?

I was busy and I'm tired and this is late. I don't know what more to say today.

Everything that life gives us, be that good or bad, will fade away. So why wouldn't you want to feel and fall so deeply into everything, for one day it will all go and it will be us that will question whether they will come back again or not ... not them.

I had nothing today. My thoughts were at a stop and I was just doing stuff and having fun and that's normal. But it got to this evening and as I prepared for my night care I was bombarded with waves of emotion. And though this podcast doesn't make sense - because I don't really say anything but still say something - atleast it showcases that it's okay when things get too much. It's okay for your smile to stretch and your eyes to fill with tears that threatened to drop for absolute no reason. Too much doesn't mean you have to have a reason, sometimes, too much can be as simple as standing and remembering all the characters that have taught you how to be a human.

Sometimes you have to take a few step backwards to then move forwards. Maybe that path isn't the easiest or the fastest. Maybe it isn't the way to go as you have a fear of judgement. But sometimes we have to just go backwards. It's the way things are. I also forgot to say 'remember being sane is overrated and I shall see you all tomorrow byee' in the podcast as someone walked into the room, so I said it now !! Byee

May has come and gone and what a rollercoaster it has been. I finished onsite work without actually finishing the work. The sun came out and went back and has now decided to stay and that to for awhile hopefully. Alot and nothing has occurred, yet the biggest thing May allowed me to do was solidify my own pace.

I'm tired and my body hurts. I spent nearly the whole day on my feet, but though there's a tiredness present right now, my day was great. It was sunny, I was productive, but most off all I spent time with the people closest to me and I've not done that in a long time. It made me realise that I've unconsciously neglected certain factors in my life, due to other priorities and that I need to start making a conscious effort in seeing where I could put in more effort and time and where could I leave behind something that's just extra baggage. Do you make a conscious effort ?

We spend so much of our time in the waiting phase not really doing anything. We plan and we want, yet don't act and so much of the time we have is wasted. Now whether that time be wasted in the waiting phase, due to fear, anxiousness or just plain confusion, now is the time to act. Don't wait for things to happen, do stuff so things can happen. Stop waiting as time doesn't wait for anyone.

You are what your company is so be aware. Aware of who is around you for they hold the power to change you.

Just lived today. Which is different to my set routine that I have, but sometimes I think you need to just live to experience a new type of pleasure.

We are all human. It is that phrase that sometimes keeps me going. It allows me to understand that no matter who, be that they are ahead in life or slowly catching up, we are all, at the end of the day, human. And this simply keeps me going ... where, I'm not sure. But I'm going.

I never know just how far someone has pushed me and my morals until I feel like I've fallen over the edge. I'm still learning to set boundaries. For having boundaries isn't bad and neither does it keep people away. They are there so you know whose good for you and who isn't.

I know I cannot say no. Its my flaw, a fatal I've been told. My need to please others sometimes overtakes the rational side of my thinking and it leads to me taking on more then I probably do. But saying no doesn't have to be such a big thing. Saying no doesn't make you any less of a person or friend. It doesn't mean that you are incapable. It simply means that you have enough on your plate already ... and that is a normal, we should all come to accept. So say no the next time you can't take on anymore and don't listen to the irrational side of yourself. You have more power then you think.

Today felt like a huge chore and responsibility. It wasn't that I did anything different. I just feel like I had more to take on my shoulder today, but I will say that I didn't give myself enough leeway. I believe that as we grow older and mature, we unconsciously take on more and more responsibilities with the thought that we HAVE to follow an exact order to do them correctly. When infact giving yourself that leeway and time to reschedule would've been a better idea. Having some time to think and re-arrange doesn't mean you've done any less of a job. It might be exactly what you need.

I made a cake today - all on my own. Don't get me wrong I cook and bake, but in my house, if one of us siblings is in the kitchen so are the rest of us and my job tends to just then be the cleaning. But today all it took was one split second of 'i can bake on my own and as long as I'm trying whatever I bake wil be fine' to push me into the kitchen. And I believe that this is also like every opportunity in life. All it takes is a split second change in mentality from I can't do it to I can, from overthinking every scenario to just doing what you love, for something, anything to turn out right. To turn out the way you want it to.

I'm unofficially finished for this summer. Due to covid I finished earlier but the ending was just as intense, if not more. I thought that a weeks rest before trying to have some good adventures would be enough. But it hit 5 and all of a sudden I was so tired and my 10 min lay down was a 10 min sleep. So honour your rest and listen to your body. More then often you may need more rest then you need and that is normal.

Being honest to yourself is actually quite hard. I think we unconsciously try and hide away from things that can potentially hurt us. But if we tried to be honest to ourselves, no matter how big or small the truth is, I think we'd find to be in happier places then we are now. So here's to being truthful from today.

I felt really emotional today. I didn't cry but I felt everything. I've also talked about how you have an impact on other people and I know how others have impacted me, but today someone sent me the nicest message and I realised that I have an impact just like others. I also mattered and still do. We all do.

I sometimes think that I'm just a little fleck in a world that's always buzzing. But what I forget is that I'm not just a little fleck. I'm alittle fleck that is a catalyst and a cause for so many other things happening in other people life's. I'm a little fleck that is also buzzing.