Secrets in the Dark

In this raw, emotionally charged episode, we explore what it feels like to fail, to wait in silence, and to question your place in a world that won't wait for you. "How Do I Hold On" is a spoken word monologue that dives deep into uncertainty, burnout, and the haunting quiet of unrealized dreams. If you've ever checked your spam folder for hope or wondered how to survive one more day — this is for you.

"One day, you'll wake up, and the pain won't feel the same. The memories will blur, the names will lose their weight, and the past will slowly loosen its grip. But how does healing actually happen? And what if you're still holding on?"In this episode of Secrets in the Dark, we explore the slow, quiet process of moving forward—the kind no one prepares you for. The places you dreaded will change, the voices in your head will fade, and, without even realizing it, you will become someone new.If you've ever wondered whether time truly heals, this episode is for you.

In a city that never stops moving, what happens when you feel like a forgotten word? This episode reflects on solitude in the midst of noise, on feeling adrift when everything around you rushes forward. We talk about the weight of routine, the ache of longing, and the quiet battle between being fine and feeling fine. For those who've ever sat in a crowded metro, surrounded yet invisible. For the ones who laugh at old jokes but wonder if they're still their own. Tune in for a conversation on the in-between—between busyness and stillness, between forgetting and remembering.

When we lose someone everyone is quick to remind us that the person is still around. That they are looking over you. But I don't think that's true. Episode 4 deals with remembering and forgetting but more importantly how the people we lose are around us, if at all. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/secrets-in-the-dark/message

Welcome back, it's been a long break. In this episode, I have a confession. Every interview I have appeared in has asked me what my strength and weakness is and I haven't told them the entire truth. But for you, I'll let it out. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/secrets-in-the-dark/message

This year had its ups and downs. A defining moment was perhaps the ICC World Cup which India lost. This episode of Secrets in the Dark recounts things that happened while someone was gone. It recounts all the things that happened while the loved one was gone and tries to catch them up on life while mourning their absence especially, in a brand new year. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/secrets-in-the-dark/message

Some dreams are scary. They make you realise how fleeting every moment is and how it can all be gone in a second. This is one such dream. Welcome back to Secrets in the Dark and this is Season 3 Episode 1. Like always please do like, share and subscribe. Let me know if you like my work. And all my best to all of you! https://linktr.ee/secretsinthedarkthepodcast --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/secrets-in-the-dark/message

Oh its been far too long but here I am with newer, possibly sadder stories. Well it's definitely sadder. But Season 3 is here and it will be streaming for next week. Till then play your favourite episodes. Settle in with a cosy blanket. ✨️ --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/secrets-in-the-dark/message

TW Mentions of suicide Remember when you were young and you thought you'd run away from everything and now that you have - you miss them. You didn't know back then that leaving meant leaving all of it behind and that you couldn't keep the things you liked. Secrets in the Dark will return for a 3rd season soon. In the meantime, thank you for tuning in. https://linktr.ee/secretsinthedarkthepodcast --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/secrets-in-the-dark/message

You wonder sometimes as you look at your mother how does she thinks about you? Does she like you, does she like have you look, what you have done and you wonder why she never said anything to you and she thinks the same. Every time you do something big, you make her proud, but you break her heart too - you are too grown now, you are far away from your mother's safety. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/secrets-in-the-dark/message

Everyone around you is in love and you are just feeling like you are missing out on something important. Do you feel like your peers have something that you don't? And you question what's wrong with me? https://linktr.ee/secretsinthedarkthepodcast for following me and the blog and the newsletter --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/secrets-in-the-dark/message

Do you ever just want to text an old friend a random fact of the day but you scroll down and realise that the last time you talked was 5 months ago? Do you remember them from time to time but find it weird to just drop in a text saying that? Here is to old friendships that have lost touch but they still matter to us very much! --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/secrets-in-the-dark/message

I am not that good at this. Maybe I am not exceptional. Maybe I am just bad at things. I used to think that I was special and gifted. I wish I was great at something. I wish there was something that I could be proud of. Maybe I don't deserve the things that I do get either. There's this frustration here. I am just average now, no longer the smartest one in the class. And I hate it. https://linktr.ee/secretsinthedarkthepodcast --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/secrets-in-the-dark/message

I wish you didn't look at me like I could be something that I am not. It has been so hard for me to accept this, but I am not this person, I can not be this person. I hate you for loving the veesion of me that doesn't exist and will never exist. https://linktr.ee/secretsinthedarkthepodcast --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/secrets-in-the-dark/message

Hello, Happy New Year. I am sorry I can't make it to your party today. I mean, I honestly don't know how to say this, but I don't want to be this person anymore. I can't keep drinking my life away. I did that for a bit, and only I know how hard it has been to be telling you this. I don't want to ruin your celebrations. I am glad that you thought of me. I just can't anymore. I hope you understand. https://linktr.ee/secretsinthedarkthepodcast --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/secrets-in-the-dark/message

Last year we had made a pact, we watch movies lying on my floor and talking. It was nice when you were around and I could watch all the gay movies right next to you and then hold you close. But now that you have left, Christmas doesn't feel like Christmas. https://linktr.ee/secretsinthedarkthepodcast?utm_source=linktree_profile_share<sid=939a9337-36e0-483f-8ea9-39d76c9dabab --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/secrets-in-the-dark/message

You have to wake up in the morning and get to this class and so you set your alarms, right on time so you don't miss it and then as you get ready to go to bed your mind plays its games on you. Spirals out of control. It talks about things you did not know about and it just keeps talking. Never stops. Convincing you of your worst fears and you let it. https://linktr.ee/secretsinthedarkthepodcast --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/secrets-in-the-dark/message

The letter reading in the group therapy for Children who have been victims of Domestic Violence continues. This letter, unlike the first one, talks about why violence is necessary to love. T.W. For abuse and violence. https://linktr.ee/secretsinthedarkthepodcast --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/secrets-in-the-dark/message

The first part of a two part story about domestic abuse. In this support group for childhood survivors of domestic abuse, we find two people- this is the story of person 1. How did they deal with it? Not too well, now they love someone who isn't very nice either because that's what they are used to. Listen to the entire story. Part 2 will be out next week. Till then, stay tuned

I wouldn't do this if it was anyone else. As much of a doormat I am, I still wouldn't do this for anyone. Its just you. You who I'd wait for. And I wonder sometimes if I just hung around would I have you? Is there any way that I could have you? Links: https://linktr.ee/secretsinthedarkthepodcast --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/secrets-in-the-dark/message

Isn't it so special to have a friend? Someone you could go to with anything you feel, whatever you are thinking about, someone who'd listen to you say things that do not make sense but laud you still for who you are. To have a friend is to have a reason to fight this cruel world everyday. This is for you, my dear friend. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/secrets-in-the-dark/message

As a precursor to the Mental Health Awareness Month, and the fact that a lot of us hold on to hope believing that things would get better but seem to meet situations over and over that make us wonder, "why should I fight?" This episode is a sad one. T.W. suicidal ideation and depression --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/secrets-in-the-dark/message

I ask you why. Why me? I ask you because I have to close this chapter to move forward. Closure is the only way forward right? Pain is stored in places you cannot move on from. And so to move away from pain, I have to move away from these feelings. All I want, is closure. But is it worth it? Episode 6 of Season 2 is on closure and if it helps. Secrets in the Dark is out once in two weeks, on Saturdays at 3 AM. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/secrets-in-the-dark/message

"How are you?", wouldn't you like to know! Episode 5 of Secrets in the Dark is an answer to someone in the past reaching out to you after all the damage that they have done to you and your life, acting nice. "I'm just fine, no thanks to you." --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/secrets-in-the-dark/message

Isn't it a different heartbreak when you find someone who is nice, who is trying their best to have your back but you cannot accept it. Episode 4 , Season 2 Don't Leave Me Here talks about how it goes when you aren't ready for a good thing but you desperately want to hold on to it still. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/secrets-in-the-dark/message

Moving on from the details that rule your mind is a hard task. It hurts and it must but to remember every nitty gritty of it is a cruelty on your own mind. Secrets in the Dark can be followed on most major social media platforms and you can share your confessions or write to me on secretsinthedark12@gmail.com. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/secrets-in-the-dark/message

Sometimes you grow up and you grow apart, friendships that you cherished and valued become a memory that you aren't very fond of. And its okay. Secrets in the Dark is out every Friday night at 3AM. You can mail in your confessions at secretsinthedark12@gmail.com to me and get a chance to be featured on one of the episodes. I hope you have a great weekend. Don't forget to subscribe to your weekly personal confessions on Substack and follow me on other social media platforms. https://linktr.ee/secretsinthedarkthepodcast --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/secrets-in-the-dark/message

TRIGGER WARNING ⚠️ Mention of sexual abuse and depression. If you relate to any of the above it would be advisable to keep away from this one. This episode is a confession made towards an abuser by the victim. If you or anyone you love are going through these things you can reach out at the resources below: 1091, 91-542-2504253, +91-11-26944880, +91-11-26944883 Emails: complaintcell-ncw@nic.in, info@guriaindia.org If you want to reach out to me you can find links on https://linktr.ee/secretsinthedarkthepodcast. ALSO, if you want to submit a confession of your own do reach out. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/secrets-in-the-dark/message

Season 2 of Secrets in the Dark is almost here- a week away, to be exact. So mark your calenders, stay up late with your face masks, and your fairylights and get comfortable because it is happening! --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/secrets-in-the-dark/message

The final episode of Secrets in the Dark Season 1 is an ode to my hometown. The love-hate relationship that I share with it that is mostly hatred and barely any love. But as you leave something, you try and learn to love it. Also, a big thank you to everyone for listening and staying back! --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/secrets-in-the-dark/message

If you like me back Well no not that- it doesn't matter what you feel about this, I will tell you that it feels bad to have loved you but the hurt still persists in me because I would rather be hurt over you than anyone else. The second last episode this season, follows a toxic neediness. Have you ever stayed because you didn't know what to do with yourself if you left? Well then this one's for you! --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/secrets-in-the-dark/message

Have you ever tried to move on from someone but it was all in vain because everytime anything that remotely reminds you of them, you are back at square one? Betty, this one is for you cause I am clearly, still not over you. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/secrets-in-the-dark/message

In a world that is isolated and lonely, the only way to find something, atleast how it seems is, to join an Online Dating Platform and looking through a well curated bunch of people. But its tiring to actually do something to keep them around so we just find someone else. And that kids, is how modern romance works. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/secrets-in-the-dark/message

A creative block often leaves you feeling drained and takes out the joy from creativity leaving you feeling a little hopeless about things and questioning who you are. On this episode of Secrets in the Dark, it is all about a creative boulder that haunts us. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/secrets-in-the-dark/message

There is no way to separate loss from love, there is no way to get over loss or love. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/secrets-in-the-dark/message

At times like these when everything seems so hopeless and its easier to fall into patterns of hopelessness, one girl is determined to have a little hope. https://linktr.ee/secretsinthedarkthepodcast for all the links! --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/secrets-in-the-dark/message

Happy New Year 2022! The last two years have been tough on the world at large and it hs been pretty impossible to actually keep an optimistic view of this one but maybe we shouldn't let one bad year keep us from celebrating a new one. What are your resolutions for the year? https://linktr.ee/secretsinthedarkthepodcast --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/secrets-in-the-dark/message

Have you ever sat in a room full of your favourite people and still been unsure about how they feel for you? Have you ever been unsure about who you even are in the first place for people to even like you? And lastly what is your biggest fear? In this episode of Secrets in the Dark you find someone's answers to these questions. Tell me your answers at secretsinthedark12@gmail.com or DM me on Instagram @secretsinthedarkthepodcast or find me here https://linktr.ee/secretsinthedarkthepodcast --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/secrets-in-the-dark/message

In the silence of the night, like a forgotten ritual, a confession is made. A wife tells her husband about the affair she has been having behind his back. What do you choose when you are unhappy: yourself or the right thing? For other links please click here: https://linktr.ee/secretsinthedarkthepodcast --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/secrets-in-the-dark/message

Marking the mid way mark of the season and the 10th episode has been a really special! This episode is a personal confession from me to you all about writing and this podcast. For all the links related to the podcast please follow the link below - https://linktr.ee/secretsinthedarkthepodcast --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/secrets-in-the-dark/message

Sometimes all you want is to run. But where do you go to when you haven't been anywhere else? Epsiode 9 of Secrets in the dark talks about leaving and how you can never really leave. For additional links to follow the podcast on social media or find it somewhere you like visiting please click on the link below. https://linktr.ee/secretsinthedarkthepodcast --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/secrets-in-the-dark/message

A box with complaints about sexual harassment is opened after many years and in it there is one letter that is written in confusion. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/secrets-in-the-dark/message

Two childhood best friends have lost touch over the years and try to fix it with... glue! --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/secrets-in-the-dark/message

A wedding party is in full swing. People are surprising the bride and groom by their mini talent shows- some by dancing, others by singing. Then the bride's best friend comes around and she has a speech ready but her speech is not one that the others expected. Find further links for the Podcast here:https://linktr.ee/secretsinthedarkthepodcast --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/secrets-in-the-dark/message

A Halloween special epsiode begins with a girl telling her doctor about how she got there. A girl, her mirror and a confession. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/secrets-in-the-dark/message

A picnic date starts falling apart with every minute that the guy doesn't show up as the narrator chips away at her self worth. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/secrets-in-the-dark/message

It gets lonely sometimes at 3 AM, but not when you have yourself and your mind can take you to mystical and magical places through the night. In the third episode, listen to a girl who gets lonely sometimes but is always keeping herself company out loud. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/secrets-in-the-dark/message

A little sister has a confession to make one that would only be understood by her elder sister. She decides to write her a letter and then read it out. The letter begins with- Dear Sister, I am scared. What is she so scared about? Let's find out in the second episode of Secrets in the Dark. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/secrets-in-the-dark/message

A late-night confession from a friend who has been isolating herself that turns into a poignant tale of how much has changed in such a short time. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/secrets-in-the-dark/message

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