The Monster Mechanics Podcast

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Why do dragons horde gold? What sort of a fish makes up a mermaids lower half? How does centaur digestion work? Hosts Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays tackle these topics and more. Asking the tough questions, and then making up the answers on the spot.

Library of Cursed Knowledge


    • Jul 6, 2022 LATEST EPISODE
    • monthly NEW EPISODES
    • 29m AVG DURATION
    • 92 EPISODES


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    Latest episodes from The Monster Mechanics Podcast

    So Long

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 6, 2022 2:22


    Thank you all for listening. If you would like to hear more from Zach and Scott, the N7 Project is a Mass Effect Replay podcast where they will continue to update. Breathing Space also features both their voices in various roles. Scott can be found on twitter. Zach is also on twitter.

    E61 Mari Lwyd

    Play Episode Listen Later May 31, 2022 51:50


    Scott and Zach talk about the singing grey mare of the Welsh winter, the Mari Lwyd Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    E60 Rat Kings (with Aaron and Ana)

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 26, 2022 45:01


    Scott and Zach are joined by Ana and Aaron of the Compleat Discography to talk about Rat Kings. The Compleat Discography The Babylon Podject Breathing Space Fading Frontier Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    E59 Superman

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 29, 2022 33:40


    Scott and Zach talk about possibly the most famous alien of all, Superman The Egg by Andy Weir - http://www.galactanet.com/oneoff/theegg_mod.html Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    E58 Monsters in my Pocket

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 22, 2022 39:10


    Scott and Zach ARE happy to see you but there are some monsters in our pockets too. The Bishop Fish Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    E57 Kelpies

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 25, 2022 37:51


    Scott and Zach talk about the murderous water horses of Scottish Folk Lore. The Kelpie. Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    E56 Mass Effect Aliens (with guest Justen Jess)

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 14, 2021


    Scott, Zach and special guest Justen talk about the alien species of Mass Effect The Compleat Discography - https://www.compleatdiscography.page/ The Babylon Podject - https://babylonpod.page/ Justen on Twitter - https://twitter.com/justenwrites Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    E55 Rancor

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 30, 2021 37:35


    Scott and Zach talk about the Star Wars beast, the Rancor. Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    E54 Displacer Beast

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 16, 2021 36:30


    Scott and Zach talk about a cat that seems to be somewhere it's not: the Displacer Beast. Breathing Space Auditions are live until the 22nd of Nov - https://twitter.com/monstermpod/status/1460018424613154816 Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    E53 Ghosts

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 2, 2021 40:42


    Scott and Zach ain't afraid of no ghosts. Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    E52 Gelatinous Cube

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 19, 2021 41:46


    Scott and Zach spend a lot of time not actually talking about the Gelatinous Cube. Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    E51 Medusa

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 5, 2021 39:06


    Scott and Zach discuss the greek legend of the most famous of the gorgons, Medusa. Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    E50 Banshee

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 21, 2021 46:44


    Scott and Zach talk about the irish spirit of wailing death, the Banshee Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    E49 Neogi

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 7, 2021 39:48


    Zach and Scott talk about Dungeon's and Dragon's favorite spider-eel monster, the Neogi. Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    E48 Furries

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 24, 2021 34:07


    Scott and Zach break down why a world full of anthropomorphic animals might exist. Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    E47 Frankenstein's Monster

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 10, 2021 37:38


    Scott and Zach talk about one of the monsters of classic literature, Frankenstein's creation. Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    E46 Liches

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 27, 2021


    Join Scott and Zach talk about the final of the Big D&D Three, the Lich. Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    E45 Baba Yaga

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 13, 2021


    Join Scott, Zach, and special guest Richard as they discuss the slavic legend of the Baba Yaga. Actually mostly her bird legged house. Richard on Twitter: https://twitter.com/rkreutzlandry Descent into Midnight: https://www.descentintomidnight.com/ Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    E44 The Minotaur

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 29, 2021 43:30


    Scott and Zach talk about the bull headed monster of Greek myth, the Minotaur Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    E43 Dragons Again

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 15, 2021 29:11


    Scott and Zach revisit possibly the most famous creatores of all, Dragons. Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    E42 Sirens

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 1, 2021 33:29


    Scott and Zach talk about the beautiful song of the Siren. Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    E41 The Terminator

    Play Episode Listen Later May 18, 2021 36:29


    Scott and Zach talk about the titular robotic menace of The Terminator franchise. Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    E40 Selkies

    Play Episode Listen Later May 4, 2021 34:06


    Scott and Zach discuss the seals of the coasts of Scotland, the Selkies. Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    E39 Kobolds

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 20, 2021 38:43


    Scott and Zach talk about everyone's favorite half hit die monster, the Kobold. Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    E38 Fylgja

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 6, 2021 32:46


    Scott and Zach talk about the norse myth of that which follows, the Fylgjia. Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    E37 Aboleth

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 23, 2021 35:56


    Scott and Zach talk about the classic D&D eldritch horror, the Aboleth Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    Random Monsters 2

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 16, 2021 11:02


    Scott and Zach do another round of randomly generated monsters. Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    E36 Zombies

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 9, 2021 33:49


    Scott and Zach talk about everyone's favorite low level undead, Zombies. Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    Planescape

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 2, 2021 15:48


    Scott and Zach talk about the best D&D setting, Planescape. (Except Spelljammer) Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    E35 Wookies

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 23, 2021 44:50


    Scott and Zach talk about the walking carpets of Star War, Wookies. Breathing Space, Fading Frontiers casting call - https://twitter.com/BreathingXSpace/status/1357441818833551361 Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    E34 Leprechauns

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 9, 2021 29:45


    Scott and Zach discuss the solitary fairy of Irish legend, the Leprechaun Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    Grabboids

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 2, 2021


    Scott and Zach talk about the monsters from the Tremors movies. Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    E33 The Dullahan

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 26, 2021 32:47


    Scott and Zach talk about the celtic myth of the Dullhan. Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    Broken Telephone Monsters 2

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 19, 2021 6:39


    Scott and Zach do another round of Broken Telephone Monsters. Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    E32 Rust Monsters

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 12, 2021 38:28


    Episode Notes Zach and Scott talk about the D&D classic, the Rust Monster. Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    Random Monsters 1

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 5, 2021 13:33


    Zach and Scott make a random monster or two. Link to the submission form: https://forms.gle/ARyyYq9CrrfR3GDb8 Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    E31 More Fantasy Peoples

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 29, 2020 56:15


    Zach and Scott do another quickfire round of Fantasy peoples. This time the focus is on Goblins, Orcs, Drow, and Giants. Husking a Coconut Coconut Crabs Gelada of the Ethiopian Highlands Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    E30 Santa (with guest Jeff Stormer)

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 15, 2020 40:36


    Scott, Zach, and special guest Jeff discuss a Grand Unified Santa Theory to explain the big red man's holiday power. Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    Choose Your Apocalypse

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 8, 2020 7:49


    Scott and Zach talk what monster deserves to put then entire world out of the misery of 2020. Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    E29 Angels and Demons

    Play Episode Listen Later Dec 1, 2020 39:43


    Scott and Zach build a world filled with their own flavor of Angels and Demons. Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    How Many Ears Does a Catgirl Have?

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 24, 2020 6:26


    Scott and Zach try to suss out just how many ears a catgirl has. Two? Four? Which are the real ones? Can they wear glasses? Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    E28 Nazgul

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 17, 2020 43:27


    Scott and Zach take the fearsome Nazgul of the Lort of the Rings and try to improve them. Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/ calvin to my hobbs Cut to my paste

    Monster Temp Agency

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 10, 2020


    Scott and Zach try to find jobs for a series of random encounters. A Manticore A Garbug Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    E27 Year End Special - Lake Worth Monster and Listener Q&A

    Play Episode Listen Later Nov 3, 2020 31:58


    Scott and Zach go on location to talk about the Lake Worth Monster and answer listener questions: The Lake Worth Monster Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    Year End Preview

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 27, 2020 5:55


    A preview of our year end special episode. Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2019 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter or email us.

    E26 Leviathan

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 20, 2020 39:25


    Scott and Zach talking about the largest of all creatures of the sea, the Leviathan Romanesco Broccoli Ribbon Worm Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    Bloopers and Outtakes 2020

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 13, 2020 13:28


    Saved from the cutting room floor, all the bloopers and outtakes from our first year of podcasts. Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    E25 Mogwai

    Play Episode Listen Later Oct 6, 2020 41:32


    Scott and Zach discuss the Mogwai of the Gremlins movies. Surinam Toad (Tripophobia Warning) Crop Milk Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    Weird Xenomorphs (with guest James Malloy)

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 29, 2020 9:22


    Scott, Zach, and special guest James discuss weird and interesting targets for infectation by a xenomorph. Skinless Furby James on Twitter Stop, Hack, and Roll Protean City Comics and Outstanding! Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    E24 Brownies

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 22, 2020 33:52


    Scott and Zach discuss the ideas of synanthropic brownies. The fae kind, not the eating kind. Unless you're a cat. Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

    What would be the Best Cerberus? (with guest Alice Kyra)

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 15, 2020 9:48


    Scott, Zach, and special guest Alice talk about what animal would be coolest if you added two more heads to it. Alice on Twitter Unlabelled AP Outstanding is part of the PCC feed Hosted by Scott Paladin and Zach Jaquays. Produced and Edited by Scott Paladin. Copyright 2020 Scott Paladin. Find us on Twitter - https://twitter.com/monstermpod Logo by VoidsGazer - https://www.instagram.com/voidsgazer/

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