Saltmates

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Welcome to the tumultuous marriage of best friends, Lauren and Chris! They tried to make a podcast about their love and positive feelings for each other... and this came out instead.

Saltmates


    • May 1, 2019 LATEST EPISODE
    • infrequent NEW EPISODES
    • 30m AVG DURATION
    • 16 EPISODES


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    Latest episodes from Saltmates

    Saltmates Ep 15: Hot Dogs, Sandwiches, and Tacos

    Play Episode Listen Later May 1, 2019 23:46


    Alright, this one got rowdy. How do you define a hot dog? Is it a sandwich? A taco? It's own thing? Chris takes a stand and it breaks Lauren's brain. Theme song: "Blackout" by The Living Statues Art by: Ellen Czinski 

    Saltmates Ep 14: Is Gator Seafood?

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 19, 2019 20:37


    A question that has plagued Catholics of the Gulf Coast for as long as only seafood was allowed on Fridays during Lent: Is Gator seafood? Lauren and Chris have strong opinions, and Lauren calls Chris an idiot, a lot. Theme song: "Blackout" by The Living Statues Art by: Ellen Czinski 

    Saltmates Ep 13: To Boy Band or Not To Boy Band

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 12, 2019 19:59


    It's a question as old as at least a few weeks ago. What constitutes a boy band? Are The Beatles technically the same genre as Backstreet Boys? Lauren and Chris throw down, as usual. Theme song: "Blackout" by The Living Statues Art by: Ellen Czinski 

    Saltmates Ep 12: The Peanut Butter Problem

    Play Episode Listen Later Apr 5, 2019 23:53


    We're baaaaaaaaack! Again! Alright, we swear we are going to be more consistent with Saltmates going forward. In this episode we debate what is the truest form of peanut butter. Is it the smooth texture of the Creamy variety? Or is it the textured form that comes from those Crunchy vibes. Things are shouted, including "divorce". This is Saltmates after all. Theme song: "Blackout" by The Living Statues Art by: Ellen Czinski 

    Saltmates Ep 11: The Wonka Vision Quandary

    Play Episode Listen Later Jan 6, 2019 34:02


    We're back with a new format and new ways to potentially ruin our relationship. This episode, we get in deep on Wonka Vision! Is it a brilliant chocolate-based subscription service or a flop of an idea guaranteed to sink Wonka for good? More importantly, will we be able to have a friendly debate without getting into a real fight? (The answer is no on that one, but you'll have to tune in for the hot deets).   Theme song: "Blackout" by The Living Statues Art by: Ellen Czinski 

    An Announcement!

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 26, 2018 4:46


    A quick announcement from Lauren and Chris.   Theme song: "Blackout" by The Living Statues Art by: Ellen Czinsk

    Saltmates Ep 10: We'll Always Have Vine

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 19, 2018 31:11


    We’re a couple of sick babies over here, so cure your colds with Saltmates now on Wednesdays! Sniffle your way through a brief history of Hot Pot, lateral thinking puzzle podcasts, nihilism and a distrust of the banks that makes Lauren want to stuff money in her mattress.  Theme song: "Blackout" by The Living Statues Art by: Ellen Czinsk

    Saltmates Ep 9: The Great Paper Towel Mystery

    Play Episode Listen Later Sep 7, 2018 38:32


    This sounds like a joke, but it's only half one. Where should we go on vacation? Southwest is having a big sale and I (Lauren) don't want to miss it! I guess Chris would be upset if I didn't mention that we talked about a beautiful impression of Terk from Tarzan, ancient Egyptian socks, my parents being in town and our missing paper towels. But all of that is unimportant! I need to buy these tickets soon!  Image of world's oldest knitted sock: https://bit.ly/2oQNpSs Theme song: "Blackout" by The Living Statues Art by: Ellen Czinski 

    Saltmates Ep 8: Probst For President

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 31, 2018 42:38


    Come on in, guys! We're back after a hectic week in which we totally meant to record an episode and then Friday turned into Monday and y'all know how that goes, right? Please? Forgive us! In our absence, we had a doozy of a week including: a sad, dumb boy who doesn't like museums, several meltdowns at the Happiest Auction on Earth, fading party memories and the announcement of Lauren's official campaign to be on Survivor. That last part isn't a joke, we talk about Survivor a lot. Worth playing for?    Theme song: "Blackout" by The Living Statues Art by: Ellen Czinski 

    Saltmates Ep 7: Too Many Pokemon

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 17, 2018 31:43


    It's a new episode, folks, so don't be a Dennis and miss out on all the fun! (You'll get that reference when you listen to it, promise). This week, Chris and Lauren fight off "the morbs" with a fightbit over cup placement, a D&D podcast-turned-book by good, good brothers, a fightlight that almost got serious and then Lauren ruins it, and a rant about Pokemon for the books. So stay tuned, stay listening and stay salty before we become downright historical (you'll get that one, too).  Theme song: "Blackout" by The Living Statues Art by: Ellen Czinski  Links to stuff we talked about: Analog Talk Podcast: https://analogtalk.podbean.com/ The Vocal Fries: https://vocalfriespod.fireside.fm/

    Saltmates Ep 6: Contagious Diseases and Lightning

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 10, 2018 38:21


    We've launched and it feels so good! Lauren and Chris celebrate by bickering over 90s teen girl pop, woke Greek myths, ASMaRtists, emergency ice cream, and pitching a new Planet of the Apes idea that you totally can't steal from us.    Links to the article and youtube channel Lauren mentions in her pre-thing of the week: https://www.youtube.com/user/SouthernIslanderDive/videos https://bit.ly/2nsDEt4   Theme song: "Blackout" by The Living Statues Art by: Ellen Czinski 

    Saltmates Ep 5: Road Trip - WTF Is Going On At Abbot Kinney?

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 1, 2018 45:25


    Beep beep! Chris and Lauren hit the road in this extra special episode. Hear them in their natural habitat while they spar over: directions obvi, Lauren’s anti-prep past, frozen pizza (does it count as pizza?), Rob Thomas's illustrious career, the immediacy of left turns, and more!   Theme song: "Blackout" by The Living Statues Art by: Ellen Czinski 

    Saltmates Ep 4: Wine, Cheese, & Seance Night

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 1, 2018 32:55


    It's a Tuesday night special, y'all! Turns out, that makes the energy REAL funky! Don't worry, Lauren and Chris are powering through and giving you all the hot goss on bagel pronunciation, Chris' photography boner, our freezer full of film, playing fight chicken, drinks vs. dates, and A HAUNTING. Don't wait on this one! It's extra salty.      Theme song: "Blackout" by The Living Statues Art by: Ellen Czinski 

    Saltmates Ep 3: Mr. Brightside, But In A Bathroom

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 1, 2018 29:35


    What's up, melty bois? Lauren and Chris are back at it again and covered in BBQ sauce and sweat to tackle Chris' entre into comedy, a heartfelt Go Fund Me, faking not being alone, and our worst critics. It's Lauren. She's very critical. Also we pause multiple times to fight off mic, because that's how we DO!      Theme song: "Blackout" by The Living Statues  Art by: Ellen Czinski 

    Saltmates Ep 2: Regis Philbin's Hot Mess

    Play Episode Listen Later Aug 1, 2018 36:27


    Buckle in for a wild ride on this one, kiddos! In this trash fire recorded for your pleasure, you'll hear Lauren and Chris fight about the city limits of LA, decide on a title for the show (spoilers, it's Saltmates), Air Bud is dead, home photo development, feather-lined robes, and the witchcraft of lipstick. It's pretty gnarly! 

    Saltmates Ep 1: Marriage Is Weird

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 31, 2018 40:03


    Welcome to the tumultuous marriage of best friends, Lauren and Chris! They tried to make a podcast about their love and positive feelings for each other... and this came out instead.   In this episode, you'll get to hear about crying, a Face/Off jacket, the magic of books and a fight over a smoothie that turns into a fight about the fight over a smoothie. OH! And Chris eats his breakfast on mic and Lauren wants to kill him. 

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