Hollywood Phonies

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The podcast where the fake movies in real movies become real movies from fake moviemakers. Hosted by Australian screen legends and comedians Ben Vernel, Adam Knox & Tommy Dassalo. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Ben Vernel, Adam Knox & Tommy Dassalo


    • Jul 4, 2022 LATEST EPISODE
    • every other week NEW EPISODES
    • 1h 11m AVG DURATION
    • 13 EPISODES


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    Latest episodes from Hollywood Phonies

    'Angels With Even Filthier Souls' (From 'Home Alone 2: Lost In New York')

    Play Episode Listen Later Jul 4, 2022 83:10


    For our SEASON ONE FINALE, we're tackling our first ever sequel: ANGELS WITH EVEN FILTHIER SOULS, from HOME ALONE 2: LOST IN NEW YORK. Johnny's back for another incredibly violent instalment in the Angels franchise. And not only do we have to come up with a whole movie, we also have to remember the entire plot that we concocted for the original movie, all the way back in episode one of the podcast. We rise to the challenge and cook up possibly the first ever sequel in cinema history, featuring approximately seventy different crime families! Follow us on Twitter and Instagram at @PhoniesPodcast and send us your hot tips for fake movies from real movies! See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

    'Heart of the Desert' (from 'Sex and the City 2') with Guy Montgomery

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 27, 2022 73:51


    This week we're joined by GUY MONTGOMERY, a man with incredibly intimate knowledge of the film SEX AND THE CITY 2 which is where we spotted HEART OF THE DESERT. We spend way too long talking about Sex and the City 2 before remembering that we have to work out an entire plot based on a poster that shows a ripped soldier in the desert, holding a young boy in camouflage. Who's the boy? Why does the poster look so cheap? And which is the better tourist destination: Abu Dhabi or New Zealand? Pour yourself a glass of wine, tune in, and find out! Follow us on Twitter and Instagram at @PhoniesPodcast and send us your hot tips for fake movies from real movies! See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

    'Helix' (from 'Notting Hill')

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 21, 2022 89:04


    Fresh from our press junket with Horse and Hound magazine, this week we're tackling HELIX from the classic rom com NOTTING HILL! Other than the fact that it's set in space and that it features a psychotic flesh-eating robot, we know basically nothing about Anna Scott's latest movie, so get ready for us to charmingly fumble our way through the plot of this sci-fi blockbuster, Hugh Grant style. Follow us on Twitter and Instagram at @PhoniesPodcast and send us your hot tips for fake movies from real movies! See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

    'Hold Your Horses: Riding High In The Saddle' (From 'Spiderman: Into The Spiderverse) with Becky Lucas

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 13, 2022 68:17


    We're hitting the track this week with special guest BECKY LUCAS, to break down the Seth Rogen vehicle ‘HOLD YOUR HORSES: RIDING HIGH IN THE SADDLE' - a sequel to a film which ALSO doesn't exist. We try to work out where things have been left in the previous film and then we get to work plotting out an epic screenplay involving a magical horse, a glue factory owner, a big climactic horse race and of course: plenty of weed smoking.Follow us on Twitter and Instagram at @PhoniesPodcast and send us your hot tips for fake movies from real movies! See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

    'Rochelle, Rochelle' (from 'Seinfeld') with Gareth Reynolds

    Play Episode Listen Later Jun 6, 2022 73:27


    We're going arthouse this week, with a very special guest: GARETH REYNOLDS from The Dollop! ROCHELLE, ROCHELLE appears frequently throughout the course of SEINFELD - a titilating piece of cinema and critical darling which eventually receives the honour of a Broadway musical adaption starring Bette Midler. We all know that it's about a young girl's strange erotic journey from Milan to Minsk, but have you ever stopped to think about just how long the journey from Milan to Minsk is? Huh? Have you ever bothered even putting those two destinations into Google Maps and seeing how long that would take? Well we have, and we're going to tell you exactly what Rochelle gets up to on her travels, in vivid detail. Follow us on Twitter and Instagram at @PhoniesPodcast and send us your hot tips for fake movies from real movies! See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

    'Chubby Rain' (from 'Bowfinger')

    Play Episode Listen Later May 30, 2022 76:03


    We're back for SEASON TWO of Hollywood Phonies, kicking off with the heartiest fake movie concept we've ever taken on: CHUBBY RAIN from BOWFINGER. Not just a fake movie in the background of one scene, a fake movie which has an ENTIRE real movie based around it. We see heaps of scenes from Chubby Rain in Bowfinger but there's still a lot of unanswered questions about this sci-fi thriller about aliens who come to earth in rain drops. We'll be deep diving into the plutonium industry, the CIA colluding with alien life-forms and of course, Heather Graham's characters racy rewrites of the script. Gotcha, suckers! Follow us on Twitter and Instagram at @PhoniesPodcast and send us your hot tips for fake movies from real movies! See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

    'See You Next Wednesday' (from John Landis' entire filmography)

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 14, 2022 104:36


    For our SEASON ONE FINALE, we've set ourselves the mammoth challenge of figuring out the plot to 'See You Next Wednesday', an infamous fake film that appears across the entire canon of film-maker John Landis. With barely any consistency in it's genre and time period, it's little wonder that we filled up an SD card attempting to break down the plot which involves a giant ape who doesn't infringe on any copyright, the wild west, and of course the most nefarious villain in cinema history: Hump Day. Follow us on Twitter and Instagram at @PhoniesPodcast and send us your hot tips for fake movies from real movies! See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

    'Jack and The Behnstacks' (from 'The Lost World: Jurassic Park)

    Play Episode Listen Later Mar 7, 2022 75:56


    We thought we'd be riffing out the plot of Robin Williams starring in Jack and the Beanstalk this week, until about half an hour before recording when we squinted at the screenshot of this poster and realised that it's actually a film called 'Jack and The Behnstacks'. But we're not going to let that stop us from creating the best sequel to one of the most tedious films of all time! Francis Ford Coppola hops back in the directors chair for an ultra violent story about circus freaks, sibling rivalry, crime fighting and most importantly: stand-up comedy. Follow us on Twitter and Instagram at @PhoniesPodcast and send us your hot tips for fake movies from real movies! See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

    'Total Devastation' (from 'Don't Look Up')

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 28, 2022 86:15


    The star-studded Netflix comedy 'Don't Look Up' rubbed a lot of people the wrong way but will the fictional film-within-a-film 'Total Devastation' have the same effect? Not if we have anything to do with it! We're going to try our darnedest to make the most apolitical film in cinema history this week, and along the way we're going to argue about the layout of the globe, throw some shade at the scientific community, and debate which Disney character would be the most suitable to be played by an ex-boxer. Follow us on Twitter and Instagram at @PhoniesPodcast and send us your hot tips for fake movies from real movies! See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

    'Dr. Honk: The Man Who Can Talk To Cars' (from 'Succession')

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 21, 2022 82:04


    We've had it too good for too long (two episodes) so this week we're challenging ourselves with the vaguest fake movie premise yet: a throwaway line from an episode of Succession. With no poster or clip to go on, we have to feel out the premise for 'Dr. Honk: The Man Who Can Talk To Cars' using only a timeframe of when it was made and the assumption that it was a critical and commercial bomb. Which trendy sitcom star will we cast as the titular Dr. Honk? How did he gain his car-communication powers? And most importantly: which car loving celebrities will we be roping in for a cameo?Follow us on Twitter and Instagram at @PhoniesPodcast and send us your hot tips for fake movies from real movies! See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

    'Sack Lunch' (from 'Seinfeld')

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 15, 2022 49:26


    Over the years, Seinfeld gave us a heap of fake movies: 'Rochelle, Rochelle', 'Chunnel', and 'The English Patient'. Today, however, we're focusing on 'Sack Lunch'. Elaine never manages to see this film over the course of the series' history, but now she can tune into this episode and hear us cook up the entire plot - starting with her biggest question 'is this a big sack, or a small family?' We also get into the weeds about Australian supermarket chains, childhood wishes, and comedy actor Lee Evans. Follow us on Twitter and Instagram at @PhoniesPodcast and send us your hot tips for fake movies from real movies! See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

    'Angels with Filthy Souls' (from 'Home Alone')

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 15, 2022 66:23


    Welcome to a brand-new podcast from comedians / screen legends Ben Vernel, Adam Knox and Tommy Dassalo, where the fake movies in real movies become real movies from fake moviemakers. For their debut episode, the boys are tackling perhaps most famous fake movie clip of all time: 'Angels with Filthy Souls' from the 1990 smash-hit film 'Home Alone'. The dramatic confrontation between Johnny and Snakes has terrified Kevin McCallister, a pizza boy, and the Wet Bandits, but when exactly in the film does this scebe take place? Who is AC and is he really taking a bath upstairs? And what is this 'business' transaction? Drugs? Organised crime? Air-conditioner repair? Or something far more idiotic? By the end of the episode, you'll have heard us figure out the entire plot and cut together a trailer for ANGELS WITH FILTHY SOULS. Follow us on Twitter and Instagram at @PhoniesPodcast and send us your hot tips for fake movies from real movies! See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

    Introducing Hollywood Phonies

    Play Episode Listen Later Feb 11, 2022 4:21


    What is Hollywood Phonies? It's a podcast, and this little trailer will tell you everything you need to know about it. If I had to put it into words though I'd say something like "The podcast where the fake movies in real movies become real movies from fake moviemakers. Hosted by Australian screen legends and comedians Ben Vernel, Adam Knox & Tommy Dassalo" or something I dunno. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

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