Rules Aren't Real - Rowan Coaching

We live in a crazy world, and it's getting crazier. For many women, it's not a world they want to bring a child into - and that's just ONE reason why women are having fewer and fewer children. In the 1970s, one in ten women reached menopause without giving birth to a child. But by 2010, it was one in five, according to data gathered by the Pew Research Center, and one in four for women with a bachelor’s degree. In Episode 19, we interview Chaele Davis, who has known she didn't want children since she found out that was an option. Born and raised in Brooklyn, NY, Chaele is a Sarah Lawrence graduate and Institute of Culinary Education trained pastry chef and baker. She chats with us about the stigmas she has faced, how she handled those encounters, and why not having children is right for her. Please have a listen, and let us know what resonates with you! To learn more, check out the notes and resources below. Thanks!

Welcome to Episode 18, where we'll be debunking the rule, "Being a mother means losing yourself." Lydia and I are SO EXCITED to welcome our special guest, the inimitable Cody McBurnett, owner and creative director of Loki Loki, a boutique brand identity and web design firm out of Brooklyn, NY. Cody is such a rad person, and she's not only maintaining that badass identity, she's passing on the principles of identity freedom and discovery to her son Waylan.

EPISODE SUMMARY Welcome to Episode 17, where we debunk the rule "Being a mother means losing yourself." Mothers face enormous stigma in every society - they have to know everything about their child, about child-rearing, about human development, and everything else included in being a modern mom. On top of all that, they have to have a personal or business passion; be a powerful, independent woman; be a model feminist; and take care of herself. As Mia Redrick put it: We must redefine who we are once we become a mother—all with less sleep, clarity and the greatest responsibility that we have ever had to assume." The job description is completely impossible, and yet women have been doing it for centuries. What if there was another way? What if you could life your life like a regular person, with integrity and authenticity, and also be a badass mom? We've met enough outside-the-box moms that we know it's possible. In fact, you'll meet one next week! For now, tune in to learn more about where this rule came from, what contributes to it, and why you might consider breaking it!

Welcome to Episode 15, the first of two special holiday episodes that have one singular purpose: to find out how people celebrate the holidays? Everyone celebrates differently, and there's no right way! We picked several spectacular humans, and asked them if and how they celebrate this time of year. Do they make margaritas on Christmas Eve? Do they swallow 12 grapes before midnight? Do they carry empty suitcases around the block? You'll never know unless you listen! Our Guests This Week Natasha Mott Neil Ruiz Lydia Billings

Welcome to Episode 15, the first of two special holiday episodes that have one singular purpose: to find out how people celebrate the holidays? Everyone celebrates differently, and there's no right way! We picked several spectacular humans, and asked them if and how they celebrate this time of year. Do they make margaritas on Christmas Eve? Do they swallow 12 grapes before midnight? Do they carry empty suitcases around the block? You'll never know unless you listen!

Welcome to Episode 14 of Rules Aren't Real, where we're joined by very special guest Marcy Richardson to debunk the rule, "Real Artists Don't Get Naked." Anyone who has ever been brave enough to put their art into the world has faced criticism of one form or another, and yet who can say what is "correct"? No one! That's the very nature of art - it is an exploration of beauty and meaning, performed or expressed in a brand new way. And if you want to perform naked - YOU DO YOU!! If you are doing your authentic thing, nothing will get in your way. Marcy is a fantastic example of someone who has thrown the rule book of "what opera singers are allowed to do" out to GD window. And good riddance, we say! Originally from Grosse Pointe, MI, Marcy Richardson is an NYC based classical soprano, aerialist and pole acrobat. In other words, she's a bad bitch and don't try this shit at home! She currently performs as a singing aerialist and pole dancer with Company XIV, a dance company that seamlessly combines dance, opera, popular music, circus arts, and burlesque to tell stories. Equally at home as a concert soloist at Carnegie Hall as she is performing in burlesque supper clubs, she has her bachelors and masters degrees in voice performance from Indiana University, and started studying pole and aerial arts 6 years ago at Body & Pole. Please visit www.marcyrichardson.com (twitter & Instagram handle-OperaGaga) to learn more!

Welcome to Episode 13, where we chat with special guest (and Colleen's client!) Lauren Slusser about her experience going makeup-free for the past decade! Lauren is a filmmaker, comic artist, and doula. Originally from Oakland, CA, she is currently studying children's media at Teacher's College, Columbia University. Prior to moving to NY, she studied Directing at UCLA and worked at Nickelodeon as the Post Production Manager for the preschool series Dora the Explorer. She's an amazing human with a fascinating perspective, so you'll definitely want to tune into this one!

Welcome to Episode 12, where Lydia and I will debunk the rule: "Women should wear makeup." This was a fascinating rule to research and uncover, since it has so many personal, societal, and historical implications. In our current age, it's considered a rebellious act to not wear makeup. A feminist choice, if you will. But in the 1920s, when the "ideal woman" was supposed to be chaste and virginal, it was rebellious to wear lipstick and rouge. It's fascinating how much context informs the argument! Tune in to learn more about that, as well as some reasons why this rule exists and why you might consider breaking it!

Welcome to Episode 11, where we are beyond excited to host special guest - and real-life circus performer/entrepreneur/author - Elie Venesky! Elie joined us to help debunk the rule, "You can't actually run away to the circus," and share his wise and vulnerable advice for anyone considering taking a leap. This is definitely one of Lydia's and my favorite episodes, and we know you'll love it too! Elie did practically nothing with his life until, at age 29, he decided to join the circus. 2 years later he was performing in Berlin with The Tigerlillies Circus. For the next 14 years, off and on, Venezky performed trapeze, lyra, and aerial dance around the US and the world. He performed on Oprah Winfrey show with the modern dance group Pilobolus, and won Most Innovative Performance at the 2009 World Burlesque Championships in Las Vegas. During that time, he also started a tutoring company and wrote three books on the emotional and psychological side of learning. He is currently working on an online math program.

Welcome to our 10TH EPISODE! WOO-HOO!! We're super excited for this and next week's episodes, since we get to debunk a craaaaazy rule: you can't actually run away to the circus. (PROTIP: You totally can!) For us, debunking this rule means a couple things: You CAN actually run away to the circus! And we're going to have a guest next week who will tell us all about his experience doing exactly that. You can (and probably should) quit that job you hate to ... Pursue that crazy passion/dream/idea! We'll start by taking a look at some signs that you may want to consider leaving your job. Next, we'll talk through some of the excuses people tell themselves to stay in these unsatisfying jobs (taking them down one by one, naturally). Then we'll give you some ideas for what to do if you DO decide to quit the job you hate and do something wonderful!

Welcome to Episode 9, where we'll be interviewing boss betch Rachel Wagers. Rachel works and lives wherever she travels around the world, helping brands launch and optimize their Amazon sales channels at Springboard Sellers. She's the perfect person to debunk the rule "You have to have a home base to run a business!" Learn more about what she does, and get in touch, at http://springboardsellers.com.

Welcome to Episode 8 of Rules Aren't Real! Join us as we debunk the rule, "You have to have a home base to run a business." Both Lydia and I are SO stoked about this episode, since we both work really hard to be able to work and travel simultaneously. It's a core value, and a hell of a good time. So what does it take to work remotely? We discuss what we've learned from our own experiences, our network, and our research. Check it out to learn if working while exploring the world might be for you!

After working in high end showrooms and freelance event planning, Dara made the full time leap to PR through an unusual path. Building on her degree in Creative Writing and an internship with a top level PR firm, she was able produce rapid results in the face of a would be crisis in March 2010, when a young woman went missing. Utilizing social media, she created what quickly became a viral twitter campaign and caught the attention of mainstream press, including The New York Daily News, New York Post and CNN, all within a single weekend. Shortly after, she was recruited to join an avant garde event planning/public relations firm, creating public relations campaigns for the monthly events, which regularly garnered 300+ attendees, included nationally recognized brands as sponsors, and were covered by such publications as Time Out NY, Village Voice, Paper Mag and more. In 2011, she was approached by several interested potential clients to found her own public relations firm, Fascinate Media. The agency took off quickly, and Dara found herself immediately working with prominent names in the entertainment and fashion business, such as Franchesca Ramsey and Rain Dove, as well individuals from other industries. Each client is unique and no matter a client's size, she will work closely with you to ensure you get the best quality representation.

Welcome to Episode 6 of Rules Aren't Real! In this episode, we're debunking the rule: "You can't start at CEO." Or in other words, you shouldn't just start a business - you should learn on OPM (other people's money) first - in particular when you're fresh out of college. Since we're all about fucking up society's rules, we're going to focus instead on what you should consider if you do want to launch a startup right after college. What's your motivation? Who's in your network? Do you have the right personality to survive entrepreneurship? We will also cover a bunch of great tips for anyone who's ready to make the leap and launch a startup. PROTIP: Be passionate, or don't bother!

Welcome to Episode 5 of Rules Aren't Real, featuring special guest Eduardo Placer. Eduardo is the CEO and Founder of Fearless Communicators. Eduardo - who is a social impact entrepreneur, global community builder and international public speaker - will be helping us to debunk the rule, "You should go to college for something practical." He is committed to building a just, equitable, sustainable, free, healthy and peaceful world. His global commitments include leadership in the Braveheart Men's Movement and the Muslim Jewish Conference. Eduardo has a BA in English from the University of Pennsylvania and an MFA in Acting from the University of California, San Diego. We're super excited to share this awesome interview, where Eduardo explains his journey from trying to follow the rules, to finally speaking and living his fullest truth.

Welcome to Episode 4 of Rules Aren't Real, where Lydia and I debunk the rule "you should go to school for something practical."  Generally, STEM degrees are lauded for being more reliable when it comes to a degree-earners ability to get a well-paying job after college. In this episode, we try to find evidence for this assumption - or for the fact that this rule isn't real!  Here's where we landed...

Welcome to Episode 3, where we invite special guest "Zoe" to further explore and debunk the rule "Feminists Shouldn't Be Submissive." Zoe is the co-founder of SSASE (Soft Smiles Association for Submissive Education). She primarily identifies with the labels: feminist, submissive, little, masochist and slave. Zoe has taught classes on submission, navigating the lifestyle, and being single while submissive. Zoe is based in NYC and can be found learning the depths of her submission, experimenting with various types of play, and enjoying cupcakes.

Welcome to Episode 2 of Rules Aren't Real, where we'll be debunking the rule that "empowered feminists shouldn't be submissive." Take a listen as we explore contemporary definitions of feminism, learn what it means to be a submissive, and challenge a rule that - at best - limits our choices and self-knowledge, and - at worst - endangers women. We're really excited about our first themed issue, and think you'll find it pretty fascinating too. Either way, we can't wait to hear your thoughts. Join the conversation in the comments section of our blog, or on our Facebook page!

In their first episode, Lydia Billings and Colleen Star Koch will be talking about what inspired them to start this podcast, why they believe it matters, and the kinds of "rules" they're planning to dissect and debunk. You'll also learn a lot about who they are - including the aspects of their personal and professional histories that have led to (or serve as examples of) rule-breaking. From the podcasters: "We had so much fun getting started, and we can't wait to hear what you think! Join the conversation in the comments sections of our blog, or on our Facebook page. Thanks!"