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Rebecca grew up in Oklahoma as part of a Gothardism cult, which she escaped aged 16. Rebecca shares how her family joined the cult, what life was like in the cult, homeschooling and how she planned her escape. She details the layers of control that led to physical and mental abuse of children in the cult and why she knew she needed to leave. Rebecca's experience of purity culture led to her writing her first book, the Scarlet Virgins, a memoir about having grown up in a legalistic religious cult. Rebecca has retired from non-fiction and now spends her free hours writing her science fantasy series, Geneshifters.Rebecca's books Scarlet Virgins and Blood Beasts Geneshifters can be found:https://www.amazon.com/Blood-Beasts-Geneshifters-Book-1-ebook/dp/B09K6WT2SQ/https://www.amazon.com/Scarlet-Virgins-When-replaces-salvation-ebook/dp/B072M67WCL/To get in touch with Rebecca:TikTok - @authorrebeccalemkeInstagram - @newcrunchymomTwitter - @newcrunchymomWebsties - rebeccalemke.com scarletvirgins.com Get in touch with us at theculturallyspeaking@gmail.com and follow us on Instagram @culturallyspeakingpodcast!
Sex and Purity Culture when it is misused....with author, Rebecca Lemke discussing her book: The Scarlet Virgins: When Sex Replaces Salvation
How unhealthy messages from Evangelicalism contributed to a life-threatening condition. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/josiah-meyer/message
How unhealthy messages from Evangelicalism contributed to a life-threatening condition. --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/josiah-meyer/message
In this episode, Rick and Josh review Rebecca Lemke's book that focuses on the purity culture, sexual brokenness and the church's response.
Thomas Umstattd is the author of Courtship in Crisis and the host of the Creative Funding Show. He works with authors to help them sell more books. Thomas is one of the most articulate people I know and the thoughtful way he engages his faith will make you to think differently, too. Today, Thomas shares his story of being distracted by a version of the prosperity Gospel and how the Lord used experience to break free from it. His story has everything from viral blog posts, to feelings of abandonment when he changed his views, and even a dating grandmother. Listen and share Thomas' story today! Stories Thomas shared: Growing up in a “middle of the road” homeschool, Christian family His faith coming his own Subtly believing the “relational prosperity gospel” of courtship Blogging about courtship hoping to make it practical His experience with courting a young woman and her dad The toxic language of purity culture and the difference from courtship culture Why he became disillusioned with courtship His grandmother's dating life was better than all his friends combined Breaking up with the courtship model of dating The closeness of God as he experienced negative reactions to his new position The healing that came through writing his book Getting married himself and expecting their first baby His podcasting career Great quotes from Thomas: When everyone around you has kissed dating goodbye you can't date even if you want to. Twisting the Gospel to do something that seems like a good thing is still twisting the Gospel. Twisting the Gospel makes it wrong. The love of God was like a warm blanket around my shoulders. You never really know God is with you in those dark places until you go to those dark places and experience God being with you. Resources Thomas mentioned: Thomas' podcasts The Creative Funding, Novel Marketing, Liberty Buzzard The viral blog post Why Courtship is Fundamentally Flawed Thomas' book Courtship in Crisis Thomas's conversation with Rebecca Lemke on her podcast discussing purity culture Notice: JavaScript is required for this content. The post Thomas Umstattd Jr. and Untwisting the Gospel appeared first on Eric Nevins.
Scarlet Virgins Podcast (May 2018) In this episode, Rebecca Lemke interviews Thomas Umstattd Jr., author of Courtship in Crisis. They discuss a variety of topics pertaining to courtship including the varying definitions it has, trying to find relationships after having been immersed in the courtship model, the differences between generations and how they view relationships and […]
On this week's episode of Theology Gals Coleen and Ashley discuss “purity culture* with Rebecca Lemke. *This episode may not be appropriate for some of our younger listeners. Episode Resources: You can find Rebecca and her podcast, The Scarlet Virgins here Rebecca's book The Scarlet Virgins: When sex replaces salvation You can find Rebecca and her podcast, The Scarlet Virgins here Rebecca's book The Scarlet Virgins: When sex replaces salvation The Scarlet Virgins episode Counter Purity Movement: Trading One Dysfunction for Another ft. Justin Megna Let’s Change the Modesty Conversation by Rachel Darnall Episode Music from Castle Pines Women can join our Facebook Group Theology Gals-Ladies Theology Discussion and Encouragement Follow us: On Facebook On Twitter @TheologyGals On Instagram theologygals Email us at theologygals@gmail.com If you'd like to ask Theology Gals a question which may be answered on a future episode, you can text or leave a voicemail at (951) 407-0234. You may also send an email. Consider supporting Theology Gals with just a few dollars a month
Self-care is extremely important for anyone working to support someone through their mental health journey. I'm quite fond of the analogy of a plane crash where, in order to help others, you must first put on your own oxygen mask. This concept underlies all of my self-care tips for those who find themselves on the end of working diligently to prevent a suicide attempt. You can read a version of this content here: http://wp.me/p6ZIkM-vW The Suicide Prevention Lifeline, there is a chat and a number to call: https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/ The wonderful woman I mentioned in the video, I think you all would like her book, "Beyond the Darkness" - here is an interview she has done so you can see what she is about: http://horizonselfdiscovery.com/interview-angie-fenimore/ Her website can be found here: http://www.angiefenimore.com/ SafeTALK Training: https://www.livingworks.net/training-and-trainers/find-a-training-workshop/ Dear listener, Please be advised this podcast episode is adapted from a YouTube video I put out in September of 2017. As such, it does not have my normal verbal opening or close and there is reference to the fact that it is a video. I don't know why, but I felt a pull to use this audio from the YouTube channel this week. I hope it is helpful. Rebecca Lemke
In this groundbreaking episode, Rebecca Lemke interviews Justin Megna about a topic no one else has touched: the "Counter Purity Movement." The Counter Purity Movement is a phrase they have coined for the scorched-earth social landscape some trod following purity culture, which includes outright hedonism, abuse within recovery communities, and versions of Christianity manipulated to be more sexually permissive. Justin and Rebecca discuss purity culture, the Counter Purity Movement, and some of the ways in which these cultures are two sides of the same coin. They talk about their own - sometimes painful - journeys in finding their way to a healthy, holistic approach to life, love, and Christianity. They are in complete agreement that Jesus Christ should our all-in-all and any path that leads away from him, whether hyper-legalistic or licentious, should be rejected. Justin Megna is the creator of thatcrazychristianromance.com, a blog dedicated to sharing biblical wisdom for romantic relationships. Justin teaches a discipleship-based approach to romantic relationships that defies both legalism and licentiousness in romance. He completed a BA in Pastoral Ministry at University of Valley Forge. Follow Justin on Twitter at @JustinMegna.
In this episode, Rebecca Lemke interviews Rebecca Lindenbach on her recently released book "Why I Didn't Rebel." They discuss the definition of rebellion, spanking, mental health, etc. Lindenbach's book is a wonderful resource for both evaluating your childhood and starting a conversation on how you would like to parent. Extra note: Due to the sensitive nature of topics like spanking and single parenthood addressed in this podcast episode, please be advised that it is not our intent to be inflammatory or derogatory in the conversation, but to approach it from our separate backgrounds and experiences and to offer a cross-cultural perspective.
On today's show we welcome author Rebecca Lemke who came out joined us here in studio from her regular base in Oklahoma. Rebecca has written The Scarlet Virgins: When Sex Replaces Salvation. Rebecca led us through a complicated and sometimes very difficult episode about sexual predators in the church, the role of purity culture in American evangelicalism and where we might find some hope in our preoccupation with all things sex, culture and church. Check out virtueinthewasteland.com for links and an article by Jeff from his recently published book, Sexy.
Join the Sisterds, with guest host Rachel Sampson, in a discussion about Purity Culture and surprise pregnancies - a chat with Rebecca Lemke. You can find links to our drinks and fangirling in our show notes at https://twistedsisterds.wordpress.com/ Find Rebecca online at rebeccalemke.com Twitter: @NewCrunchyMom Podcast: The Scarlet Virgins Podcast wherever you listen to podcasts. Twisted Sisterds is a production of the Inglorious Pasterds Network of podcasts. We now have our own Patreon page! Support us at www.patreon.com/twistedsisterds to discuss the episodes in more than 140 characters at a time, get Sisterds swag, and even shape the content of the episodes. Like our Facebook page! facebook.com/sisterdspodcast Subscribe and drop us a 5-star review on Apple Podcasts Tweet at us @TwistedSisterds @beckyseville @rachelssampson (guest host in September 2017)
Rebecca Lemke joins us to talk about her book "The Scarlet Virgins" and about growing up in the purity culture.
Rebecca Lemke | Christianity Under TrialMother, author and podcast host of "The Scarley Virgins," Rebecca Lemke reveals herself.Rebecca unveils the journey of anorexia and pregnancy difficulty. She also talked about how Jesus was the biggest factor in overcoming obstacles through becoming an author and blogger. Rebecca also reveals:-- Her need to blog about motherhood-- Her Huffington Post article about a Black man in college-- The role The Purity Culture has impacted sex in Christianity-- The powerful love story with her husbandYou can follow Rebecca on the following social media platforms:The Scarlet Virgins - BookThe Scarlet Virgins - PodcastNew Crunchy Mom - Blog@NewCrunchyMom - Twitter See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.
Rebecca Lemke is a 21 year-old housewife, mom, and author about her experiences in what’s known as “Purity Culture.” We talk about how the strict legalism of some people around her almost overshadowed the grace preached at her own church, how God brought the right people into her life to give her a better understanding, […] The post Rebecca Lemke Talks Purity, Legalism, and Finding Grace appeared first on Eric Nevins.
"Men can't be sexually assaulted," "men are emotionless," "men are inherently bad because they are sexual," etc. These are all things Rebecca learned about men through purity culture. In this episode, she addresses these assumptions and calls out purity culture's failed promises by pointing out how the side effects of the movement are not unlike the ramifications of a pornography addiction. For more bonus content and to get your copy of Rebecca Lemke's "The Scarlet Virgins" - visit scarletvirgins.com.
Is it okay to cut your hair, wear makeup, wear spaghetti straps, and get your ears pierced? It depends on who you ask! As a child, Rebecca had many friends who were not allowed or afforded even the most basic of grooming and cosmetic choices. In this episode, she discusses coming out of this unique part of modesty and purity culture and the things that have helped her in this journey. For more bonus content and to get your copy of Rebecca Lemke's "The Scarlet Virgins" - visit scarletvirgins.com.
On 6/23/2017 Rebecca was interviewed by Thomas Umstattd Jr on The Bridge in Austin, TX. Listen here to the audio of there exchange, where they discuss the way legalistic Purity Culture elevates sex and a false idea of “purity,” and buries the Gospel. For more bonus content and to get your copy of Rebecca Lemke's "The Scarlet Virgins" - visit scarletvirgins.com.
Masturbation is a taboo subject, sometimes even in secular culture. But if we never talk about it, we inadvertently add unnecessary shame to the topic. Most of us have learned that the Bible says it is wrong, but what does the Bible actually say about it? In this episode, Rebecca talks about relevant Scripture on the topic, practical things to consider, and he own thoughts on the matter. For more bonus content and to get your copy of Rebecca Lemke's "The Scarlet Virgins" - visit scarletvirgins.com.
When you break off a dating relationship, it hurts. But what happens when you get dumped (by a Dad or otherwise) in courtship? The stakes are the equivalent of a broken engagement, and some would even say a marriage. The pain is excruciating, but if you've had a failed courtship, you aren't alone! In this episode, Rebecca talks about her own experience with a failed courtship (and her husband's) and what you can do to heal afterwards. For more bonus content and to get your copy of Rebecca Lemke's "The Scarlet Virgins" - visit scarletvirgins.com.
Keith and Ben sit down and talk with Rebecca Lemke and talk about her new book. Listen as they dive into this idea of purity culture and the harmful effects that it can actually have on young people. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.
Many purity culture "graduates" experience hangups when they get married when it comes to their sexual lives and relationship with their spouse. The fear and shame learned from purity culture often leads them to stay silent about their private thought lives and other intimate details that should be freely shared with their spouse. In this episode, Rebecca addresses a few of these hangups and encourages spouses to love one another fully by working together to overcome these hangups. For more bonus content and to get your copy of Rebecca Lemke's "The Scarlet Virgins" - visit scarletvirgins.com.
Secular culture and Christian purity culture both push certain narratives about pornography, but are they correct? In this episode, Rebecca discusses the social scripts on both sides of the spectrum and identifies issues she finds with both. Her belief is that we need a new approach to pornography, one that is truly empowering. For more bonus content and to get your copy of Rebecca Lemke's "The Scarlet Virgins" - visit scarletvirgins.com.
After being raised in legalistic purity culture, Rebecca experienced the loss of many friends walking away from the Christian faith. In this episode, she details her journey in dealing with friends apostatizing and what she has learned to do (and what not to do) when this happens. For more bonus content and to get your copy of Rebecca Lemke's "The Scarlet Virgins" - visit scarletvirgins.com.
Growing up in purity culture, Rebecca and her female friends always heard phrases like "men are visual", "boys will be boys", etc. These phrases taught that men were perverted sex beasts due to their interest in sex and that women were more prim and proper, and naturally disinterested in sex. In this episode, Rebecca talks about ladies who struggle with lust to let them know they aren't alone and assures all who struggle that our identity is not found in our failings, but in Christ's sacrifice! For more bonus content and to get your copy of Rebecca Lemke's "The Scarlet Virgins" - visit scarletvirgins.com.
Legalism in purity culture produces shame, which in turn can cause internalized self-hatred. Addiction, mental health issues, and self-harm are all a result of this internalized self-hatred. In this episode, Rebecca talks about the scars we carry, whether they are physical or mental, and introduces a new way of thinking about our permanent marks. Jesus has scars just like us, and ours serve as a perfect way to point us to Him. For more bonus content and to get your copy of Rebecca Lemke's "The Scarlet Virgins" - visit scarletvirgins.com.
When Rebecca talks about taboo topics that come up in purity culture like mental health and sex, she often hears something along the lines of, "Aren't you worried what people will think?" In this episode, she challenges the assumption that speaking about something means you are being irreverent and shares the lack of fear she has in talking about brokenness in Jesus. For more bonus content and to get your copy of Rebecca Lemke's "The Scarlet Virgins" - visit scarletvirgins.com.
Growing up, Rebecca Lemke was taught that modesty was a woman's issue. She was told that men were visual and didn't possess self-control, so it was the duty of her and her female friends to keep their male companions on the straight and narrow. After leaving legalism and purity culture, Rebecca was introduced to the idea that women play no part in loving their male neighbors through their wardrobe. This rhetoric left her thinking: Am I my brother's keeper? In this episode, she recounts her experiences with both of these schools of thought and offers her Christ-focused approach as an alternative. For more bonus content and to get your copy of Rebecca Lemke's "The Scarlet Virgins" - visit scarletvirgins.com.
Secular culture tells us that, before we enter into marriage, we need to "try" each other out sexually. This culture has a large focus on love in connection with sex and attraction. On the flip-side, legalistic purity culture often dictates that marriage is more about obligation, and some facets even claim that love is only a choice as opposed to a feeling. In this episode, Rebecca seeks to unite what each culture gets right about sex and love while dispelling the incorrect and faulty assumptions found on both sides. For more bonus content and to get your copy of "The Scarlet Virgins" by Rebecca Lemke - visit scarletvirgins.com.
Both purity culture and secular culture set our expectations of sex (or "sexpectations"). While it may be tempting to reduce one view to being right and the other view to being wrong, we must examine both through the truth of scripture and our own consciences. In this episode, Rebecca talks about what both cultures get wrong when it comes to setting sexual expectations, and encourages listeners to nix what they think they know about sex. For more bonus content and to get your copy of "The Scarlet Virgins" by Rebecca Lemke - visit scarletvirgins.com.
Our assumptions and internalized beliefs about sex can have a negative impact on the intimacy that takes place in marriage, especially when you've been raised in legalism or purity culture. In this episode, Rebecca challenges some of the common mindset problems that disrupt healthy sexuality such as the nasty rumor that women aren't sexual. She also addresses some of the insecurities that crop up for both sexes, like body imagine issues and previous sexual encounters or assaults. For more bonus content and to get your copy of "The Scarlet Virgins" by Rebecca Lemke - visit scarletvirgins.com.
The vocations of singleness and marriage are ones that can be mishandled by the modern Christian church. Imbalance has come about in thinking about and discussing both vocations, often due to misrepresentation, twisting of scripture, and a lack of empathy. In this episode, Rebecca discusses the importance of viewing the vocations of this life through a holistic mindset and not being caught up in counting the quantity of people in any given vocation. For more bonus content and to get your copy of "The Scarlet Virgins" by Rebecca Lemke - visit scarletvirgins.com.
Joshua Harris' famous (or infamous) book, I Kissed Dating Goodbye is a major piece of purity culture's history. The content of this book is so controversial that many parents and children who grew up in the era this book influenced are still sorting out their thoughts about it! In this episode, Rebecca discusses her current attitude towards the author and respectfully challenges many of his assertions. For more bonus content and to get your copy of "The Scarlet Virgins" by Rebecca Lemke - visit scarletvirgins.com.
21-year-old Oklahoma native Rebecca Lemke grew up in a tiny conservative homeschooling community. The virtues of modesty and purity were a large focus of her childhood, and while she believes that they are wonderful goals, she has learned firsthand that the manner in which they are approached can be the difference between life and death, both spiritually and physically. Rebecca has a heart for the victims of spiritual, mental, physical, sexual, and emotional abuse. As the result of her deep-seated belief in holistic living, which includes holistic spirituality and sexuality, she strongly advocates for Christ to be our ultimate focus. With her book, The Scarlet Virgins, she takes on the deceptive lies of legalistic purity culture with intimate vulnerability and love. Find out more at www.scarletvirgins.com.