Good Job Adventures

Breathweaver! Rise! Eligos! Secede! Vilhelm! Beer! Ander! Killing everything in sight! Aul! Hissing!

Breathweaver Flies, Eligos Leads, Vilhelm’s Gears, Ander Jumps, Aul Pissing

Breathweaver’s Size, Eligos Bleeds, Vilhelm’s Fear, Ander’s Chump, Aul Missing

The gloves are on and the Mask is off. A literal godsend, this “army” against “evil” and Aul’s “enemies” “awaits” the party’s “training”. Eligos the Silver Tongued Fister lives up to both parts of his nickname. Vilhelm the Goblin Lusted Power (Armored) Bottom lives up to part of his....But enough nicknames. Breathweaver flies now, flashing back, then flashing forward, then flashing Ignitus (allegedly). Ander dies a bit on the inside, then a bit on the outside during back to back HR meetings. Aul sees ghosts and gets some spawn of darkness. Bread boy gets ghosted and pays some spawn of darkness (tiefling child support). There’s also Larry!

Vilhelm is back and sweatier than ever. After defeating the Chaos Dragon and colliding into the base universe, the party has finally ditched their dead wroth, sorry, dead weight. Unsure what to do or frankly what is even happening, they do some light exercise then destroy their Gods with FACTS and LOGIC. Bread Boy is revealed to be more than meets the rye. Mask is revealed to be a turbo cuck. Blasto is revealed to have been unimportant. SJWs (Sinister Jingoistic Wishers) beware as the party begins to implement their 12 Rules for Death!

All the world’s a stage, and this stage is on fire (and also lost it lighting for 15 minutes). The universe is ending, there’s a mythical pale ale dragon, a Category 5e hurricane, and a sea sharty loving pirate! If that doesn’t get you hot and bothered I don’t know what we can even offer at this point. A robot? Was there a robot? We aren’t sure. Maybe a warrior dog that stands on 2 legs named Khal Doggo! That definitely was included (just off screen and never explicitly mentioned). Either way, find out by listening!

"Speak to this Abishai but beware, he carries a terrible truth." "Oooh, that's bad." "But the truth will help save the party?" "That's good!" "The truth is about the inevitable destruction of the universe" "That's bad." "But Kahraba knows how to escape it." "That's good!" "Kahraba is still working to finish the machine needed to avert this crisis.......that's bad." "Can I murder hobo now?"

Did you ever heard the Tragedy of Monk Jackie the Brainless? I thought not. It’s not a story her pupil would remember. It's a Jander side quest. Monk Jackie was a Drunken Master Monk, so powerful and so alcoholic she could use her ki to influence her hands to create fists... She had such a knowledge of martial arts that she could even keep the ones she cared about from getting sunburnt. The Monk side of martial arts is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be useless. She became so "powerful"... the only thing she was afraid of was being murdered by killbots, which eventually, of course, she was. Unfortunately, she taught her apprentice nothing she knew, then her apprentice forgot about her in his sleep. It's ironic she couldn't save others from death, especially herself.

New year, new you. New episode, new Aul. After tricking the kobolds in the construction lab with his vast wit (he was loud angry robot), Aul and party explore the room where the magic (circles) happen. Tak'tha assumes control of Group A, headed off to destroy Kahraba's automatons and Eligos' self-esteem. Wroth and Aul lead Group Arthos to explore the main antechamber. There's a magic circle here. Wroth get half chub. Kobauld and Arthos trick enemies into circle for Wroth to teleport. Wroth now full chub.

In this exciting and long anticipated sequel -written and directed by JJ Abrams- Wroth's lawsuit turns violent as the legal proceedings turn into lethal proceedings. Luckily, the party has his back. His broken husk of a back. Mystery boxes are abound in this tense, lawyerly showdown.

Has this ever happened to you? You're going about your day, exploring the depths of a sinister volcanic lair, when the wooden bridge you are crossing collapses, casting you down into a dark ravine and an even darker future of constant back pain. If so, you may be entitled to damages. Reach out now to Aul Speaks For You, the premiere lawful evil lawfirm for bridge related incidents. And if you are stabbed by an assassin then flung into automata combat while serving the defendant, Aul will help you with that too. Because at this firm, we have your back. As we say always say, wrongful injury is not water under the bridge. The only thing under the bridge is you (and your future settlement!). Call now please!!

You know that scene from Black Panther when Killmonger raids the British Museum to liberate all those priceless artifacts but it then turns out the museum was heavily guarded and actually in a volcano and is being run by an evil dragon named Kahraba? This episode's a bit like that. Also there is a literal loot goblin. It winks at Wroth suspiciously. A bit like that scene from Pink Panther. Though unlike that scene (and Vilhelm's fan fic), Wroth isn't completely naked, greased up, and ready to rumble

A lot of crucial things happen this episode. Some of us cross a bridge. Some of us don't. Some of our fatter members fall through a bridge. Some of us (everyone else) don't. Some of us traverse a cave with bugs in it. Some of us also do that but in a different cave. But ultimately all of us learn something valuable about the meaning of "friendship". Namely that that dumb bug guy thought it was an actual ship.

You asked and we listened: vaping is now canon in the GJACU (GJA Cinematic Universe (Good Job Adventures Cinematic Universe)). After escaping from the brig with his bug friend (the bug says “acquaintance” is more accurate), Arthos kills both the generator and Wroth's buzz. In this lights out episode, both past and future cling to the darkness, waiting to be uncovered. As Aul once said, “strange and awful things lurk inside the shadow of every man.” And as Jander once strangely and awfully remarked to Eligos, "in the dark, no one can hear you scream". It's worth noting it was nighttime when Jander screamed this.

One does not simply walk into Burj al-Barq. There is a gate. A metal gate. Bread boy thicc. And some strict entry guidelines enforced by two air elements (more like square elementals, as they are lame). After refusing a deal to accept the party's prison labor they instead make a counteroffer: to imprison us. Luckily, Wroth's circle gets these squares. Though the deal went south (for Arthos, who fell in a pit), things are looking up for the rest of the party (there's an elevator and also no more Arthos). Something happened with a gargoyle too, but he's dead now.

You may hate this episode, it's coarse and gets everywhere. After testing their metal against a horde of rampaging killbots (and also Arthos), the party makes headway through some red clay, crossing the unforgiving Alharu Badlands (though not before Aul crosses the town mayor). Between red sand, redder sunburns, and reddest lava, this camel towed party truly gets their just deserts.

You've heard of Air Jordan, yeah? Well check out the hang time on Air Aul. You've heard of Air Bud? Well Arthos is nearly as intelligent. You've heard of Air Pods? Well listen to Wroth's ear splitting shatter. And you've heard of Eligos and Jander? They breathe air. Check out the episode please.

There's a new Sheriff in town and his name is the Artist Formerly Known as Vilhelm. Watch out you flesh frying freebooters, bar burning bandits, serial killer sommeliers, letter reading vagabonds, and salacious goblin solicitors, cause this Sheriff isn't afraid to get his hands dirty....with blood!

It's a big day for Big Heph, and a bigger day for Big Heph's best boy Bilhelm the Boblin Bucker. Face to face with a creature that defies explanation (especially Ander's), the party begins to understand what force has been warping fate against them. And they begin to understand why no one bought Breathweaver a birthday present. How will the party fare against a creature of pure malice and murderous intent? (No, it's not Ander, though also yes, it's Ander).

As a crab has pincers, we have pins, sure. The party is a bunch of Snakes on an Ethereal Plane, trying to find din din for Blasto, which apparently is his actual name. But instead of Samuel L. Jackson swearing, we have First Mate John Peters discussing the ins and outs of 69ing. And instead of snakes we have many, many references. And instead of jet fuel, we have steel beams. We didn't think it was physically possible but this episode both blows and sucks.

Things are really heating up this episode, and though the metal's not quite molten, it sure is moltin'. Aarakocra and kenku are back at it, as birds of a fetter concoct together. Dubilious tests his mettle with his metal test, as the party dubiously meddles with some testy canines. Dan Schneider lurks in the shadows, hungry for human-dragon flesh.

The fans asked and we listened: the origin story of Oakley Bumer is revealed this episode! The origin story of his death. Got 'em. Also Gol ‘em. Bumer ear-waxes poetic as he and another fan favorite (the ice wall penetrator) are gruesomely gruesomed. Also, about 40 different IPs are made canon. Including, fan favorite GOOP™

What secrets await in Vault 69? An ass-lusted goblin, a demonic fuck goat, or Todd Howard's latest Fallout disappointment? Unfortunately, we don't know. The party decided to advance the story instead. Surprising, we know. Later, the mysterious bony boy returns to make things a bit saucy. His magic finger makes the party go wild, as he disrupts a 47 person conga line with his dastardly magic!

A new challenger approaches! Armed with dogs and dogged by skeletons, this bony boy never learned it's rude to point at people....especially when a vaporizing green ray comes out of your finger. We get it, you vaporize. Second half is blueprint, mirror puzzle, lil' bit of elevator.

There’s a few red flags this episode, and one of them marks the ship of famed captain, Wilford Weatherville, scourge of a non-suspicious number of seas. Forming his makeshift crew is Vilhelm the Critic, Eligos the Cruel, Ander the Unholy, and John Peters, trusted first mate and definitely not co-captain. At Van Korfer’s, they meet a few inventors with some funny ideas, and meet one with some unfunny ideas. This laughable clown will walk the plank; no one will remember him when he’s gone.

The bar’s set high this episode, as the party works to hone their crafts and brew some protein shakes. Vilhelm forges some wavy knives, Ander cheats on his loyal patron, Aul starts binging Monk, and Breathweaver flies now! Eligos ruins the best laid plans of mice and Vin.

Description: The failed ascension of the tower has left the party wounded and weary. Laying to rest the two lives lost at its peak, they soon find a promising lead to another tower: an exclusive invitation addressed to Cas, for a meeting of the minds hosted by Tophec's richest man, Fixis van Korfer.

Alack! Come all ye faithless, tis’ a dark and stormy Wednesday night! Evil hath set a sight most foul upon the town o’ Spartzagard . Caught in the crosshairs doth be-ith our five spirit-stained sirrah. Survival doth ist rarer than a nobleman’s laugh for tonight rapture's ravin feast. Tis’ a plague with no cure, no name, no end, no mercy. And it’s name...is Chrees. Ye best pray for mercy in-ith ....Rise of the Rat King!

In the heart of the tower of Ruel, our heroes (and Ander) confront the final machinations Cas has in store for them.

Abandon all hope ye who enter here. Revenge, forgiveness, and a whole lot of flavor text awaits the party. Remember tonight, for it is the beginning of the end...of this arc! Welcome to the tower of Ruel.

A lot of shady deals happen in Larry's bar: orcspice smuggling, child labor, and some questionable keytar solos. Our favorite Half-Orc has friends in low places, and by the end of this episode, high ones, as Cas’ master plan comes to fruition

Larry isn't the only one behind bars this episode. After someone broke the first rule of fight pit (don't talk about the fight pit, unless Aul is speaking for you), the party is thrown into jail. Unfortunately, there's a few obstacles blocking their escape: Ander's bloodlust, Aul's obese acrobatics, Vilhelm's shins, and Breathweaver. Eligos meanwhile falls in the woods with no one else around. He makes a sound.

Is that a banana in your pocket or are you just happy to see Breathweaver? Vilhelm’s in quite a sticky situation this episode after he grabs some wood and enters a hole. He's gotta take down the reigning champ of Ruel’s secret arena, a masked man and/or broad of mystery. Ander, too, has his own fight to face: basic reading. Meanwhile, Eligos splits up from the party with Nash. Wanting to stay away from any illegal activities, he beats up some police. All bets are off (well...besides two of them) in this combative episode.

Sugar, spice, and everything nice! These were the ingredients chosen to create the perfect stew but Vilhelm accidentally added an extra ingredient to the concoction...Vinegar. Thus Episode 11 was born! Sworn to fight the forces of Nina, the party investigates a potentially haunted orphanage, though it turns out there is no ghost, just a ghoul. But don't let that get you down. After all, you see that sign over there: no shirt, no shoes, no parents!

Rums the word this episode. Larry sets the bar high and stink bombs low, sending the party out on promotion duties in exchange for information he probably doesn't have. Too bad he's banned from using facetome to promote after flooding it with pro-Larry bots. Between racist dwarves and rival pubs, the party catches a few whiffs of trouble brewing....though some catch it a bit more in the end.

We break the one horror movie taboo this episode: the gang splits up. Unless soliciting goblina "happy time" is taboo. We break that too. Also Ander breaks a toilet. And Eligos breaks out of jail. Aul breaks the law. Breathweaver breaks character...

God is dead, Nietzsche once famously declared. Well Vin has something to say about that. And that something is "nuh uh!". Now free from Prae's simulation, the party needs some bones reset and muscles fixed, but not to worry, Larry's no stranger when dealing with a dead body. Oh, they're not dead? Well that changes up the usuals for the night. Larry's pub is front and center this episode, and his band, bunkbeds, ballpits, and drinks are all very cool and noble. In fact, the usuals from him tonight are so good it'll lead you to (Human Dragon) Jesus. Or maybe Big Heph. As Larry once famously declared, God is mead.

A trip to Tophec! A Human Dragon Jesus! Aul's vintage wifebeater! Eligos' vintage IOU! A copy of 2Fast2Vilhelms on Blu-Ray (of Frost). Real recognize real (or maybe not) in an installment of WEIRD OF FORTUNE that really slaps....just not as much as Ander does.

Something Vilhelm this way comes! Our carnival episode has it all: krettlecorn, 54 different dice rolls, the best riding scene since Brokeback Goblin. We also swooce right into a fight with Raggy and his beloved dog, Gus. In this tents fight, stakes are high. And then lowered. By Ander. He loves killing. Ruh roh...(Please don't sue us Hanna-Barbera.)

They say a picture's worth a thousand words. Well, in this episode there's a lot of pictures. Talking pictures. Which means they're worth more than a thousand words, which honestly, may be too many. Especially when our human dragon uses 5 seconds per syllable and our new Italian NPC uses 5 syllables per second. One of them dies, but probably not the one you wanted. Second half is silent armor fight.

If a goblin falls in a fight without climbing anyone, does Vilhelm still get sweaty? Questions are the name of the game this episode and P̸͛̓r̵̎͌a̷͔̒e̴͈͠ asks them all. Or does he? Can Ander really read? Is Aul fatter than he leads on? Why does Breathweaver talk like that? Who watches the watchmen? Eligos?!

Gongs, gnolls, and many, many questionable catchphrases. What more could you want in a D&D session? Leather? We got that. Sweaty dwarves? Check. Two types of tea? You betcha. A party that has any idea of what it's doing? Well...maybe not this last one.

Grab your torches, your rations, and your gongs. We're going dungeon diving...after a quick trip to the bakery. Every adventurer needs to carbo load before a big trip, and word on the street sweep is bagels are fresh today. Get ready for this empty calorie adventure.

Fat orcs, fat bread boys, fat chance you'll want to miss this episode. The gang is all here, and it's hot today. There'll be time for refreshments later, but first our adventurers will have to put in some work with the local guild. Do they have what it takes to rise the ranks? Will they get to lose all that weight? Or will the heat get to them?

It's time to meet the cast! Join the DM (Vincent), the Rogue Aul (Tyler), the Cleric Vilhelm (Harris), the Sorcerer Breathweaver (Corley), the Warlock Morgan (Ander), and the Paladin Eligos (Plombo) in their D&D Adventure. Will their wishes come true? Will their podcast be successful? Will Tyler ever like a joke I put in the description? We hope so! Good Job Adventures!