Hockey Goes to College

We're back by Ryan Lambert and Joe Meloni

Simply having a wonderful Christmastime by Ryan Lambert and Joe Meloni

EITHER OR by Ryan Lambert and Joe Meloni

I did not say "obrigations clopping up." Roll back the tape! I didn't say it! That's baloney.

Stop snitching stop lying by Ryan Lambert and Joe Meloni

A bunch of mouthbreathing freaks from UMass got mad at me for saying a 108.4 PDO is unsustainable. Adversity and compete, that sort of thing. Watch the games.

We said a lot of numbers in this one bye.

You see this, you hear about this?

We talked about Lowell this week but only because Joey made me do it. Literally he said, "I want you to talk about Lowell" before we started recording, so really this is all his fault, and not mine.

I think I forgot to write a description for last week's episode but I'm neither going to check whether that's true nor fix it if it is. Thanks have a good weekend.

Season preview pt. 3: The least-bad teams by Ryan Lambert and Joe Meloni

Ok here's more season preview. I saw a sad movie today and I'm not into this. Bye.

Okay we are doing our very good season previews but Joey was really mean to me this time. Not a fan. Might not do any more episodes.

trapped in podcast factory send help

Folks we are being so nice and just doing summer.

I dunno man. Have a good one.

But like only listen after you have listened to this college hockey podcast and unsubscribed from whatever other college hockey podcasts you currently listen to. Frankly my only two takes on the Weezer "Africa" cover are as follows: 1) It's good. 2) But it would have been better if it had been less faithful to the original and they swapped out the synths for a crunchy early-Weezer-style guitar. But the second one is a minor quibble (see Take No. 1) and it was a true delight to hear that this morning. Hope you're doing well otherwise. Have a good one.

Boy this is a weird one.

Folks Joey was so so so sick for the last week so we couldn't record cuz of his SINUSES. Gross!!!!! But now we're back and we just talk about all kinds of fun stuff baby!

So Dunkin' Donuts is piloting a new product called Donut Fries and basically it's if a croissant was fried dough at the same time. Deep-fried croissant rolled in cinnamon and sugar, served warm. Someone on Twitter said it's just a churro but it's lighter than a churro and that person was a HATER who has never had a donut fry in her miserable life. I've had a donut fry and my day is enriched!!!! Also the national title game is tonight. Whatever who cares they don't have donut fries there.

Joey ruined our recording on Monday so I forced him to call me from St. Paul. Can you even believe Skype didn't totally cooperate with us? Wow, totally unforeseeable.

Some dweeb-o Tech fan tried to tell Joey what corsi is over the weekend and I have never been so offended in my life.

We talk for so long about the conference tournaments and also the NCAA tournament and I come up with a very good bit that makes Joey very annoyed.

I made Joey call me at 9 in the damn morning to talk about Friday's games. He didn't call me until 9:15 because of how rude and hung over her is.

This is a really long one cuz we talk about Mark Dennehy (he is good) and the playoffs (also good). Pretty lively episode, I gotta say.

This week I said what I thought was very obviously a joke but Joey was like, "WHAT REALLY?" No not really. I was just joking.

I'm very proud: The extent to which we talk about hockey this week has to be at an all-time high. I only said a guy's "butt fell off while he was crapping and landed in the toilet" once!

We had a genuine disagreement about the NCHC and I got heated. To be fair, I was right. And also to be fair, Joey was wrong. I forget what else we talked about. It was probably kinda boring. Anyway, see ya.

I told you all year that Northeastern would win the Beanpot and they did it. This is the first year I ever thought they would win it, and then they did. It's a 1-to-1 correlation and frankly I'm the main reason they won. Congratulations to me, The Northeastern Believer. And also, I guess, everyone who actually is on the team also gets congratulations. But not as many as me. This was my doing.

This was mostly about Hobey front-runners. My recording got kinda screwed up like 50 minutes in so there's a couple dead seconds and we lost like seven minutes of us talking. I'm not sure what happened but we mostly made up for it then we make fun of Dick Umile at the end. Pretty good show.

VLAD MADE THE HALL !!!!! by Ryan Lambert and Joe Meloni

This week's show might set a record for non-college-hockey content. And I mean compared with every other podcast, like Hardcore History and all those NPR ones that aren't actually podcasts since they're on the radio, but we're supposed to act like they are. I'm including those as well. See you in hell, is what I say to them.

We talked about Hobey stuff and other things but mostly Joey called me annoying for saying Bill Belichick is a bad person. But guess what, baby: He is!!!

Folks it's the last one before the holidays and it's a weird one but that's fine with us. Whatever. Enjoy your time off.

Joey is trying to say that you should be eligible for the NCAA tournament even if you're below .500 and it's just about the dumbest thing he's ever said.

We had to record on Sunday cuz I'm going to the Celtics on Monday and Lowell/Bentley on Tuesday and then going on vacation so I'll see you in hell, idiots.

I tried to start the show talking about Curt Schilling and bad stuff like that but Joey made me delete it even though he was perfectly happy to talk about it not on the air. Very mean guy. Not a fan.

Joey thinks there are teams that just "know how to win" can you believe that lmao cmon dawg get a grip. Is "clutch" real too? Ha ha ha. Man.

Joey made the very bad mistake of asking me about dinosaurs to start off the show. I don't know what he was thinking but to me it is the only time I have ever enjoyed doing this podcast. I can't wait to hear from like six of you how we didn't talk about college hockey enough this week. I love getting that kind of feedback.

Folks we are getting to the bottom of this Manafort thing.

The amount of swearing in this episode is, I preemptively agree, too much. I don't know how to change the thing in iTunes to say "explicit language" and I'm afraid Tim Cook is gonna call me out publicly. Anyway, I think it's a thing where I had too much caffeine today (four cups of tea! What was I thinking?!) but I can't explain Joey's language except to say that he went to UMass Amherst so it's probably because he's a bad person. I also don't think this is a very good episode this time around, but it's done so whatever. Can't unspill that milk, baby! Or, in my case, four cups of tea. Bye.

We didn't have a ton to talk about this week because it's early in the season and who cares. But anyway, I was trying to get this to finish at exactly one hour, and I went over by 4.67 hundredths of a second. Pretty good reflexes but not good enough. However, you should know this: I will never apologize.

Oh my god we talk about goaltending for like six goddamn hours. I'm really sorry. It's too much and you don't deserve that kind of treatment. The only reason to listen to this episode is for when I in-depth-explain a mid-card WCW feud from 1997.

Remember in "D2: The Mighty Ducks" when they somehow put Russ Tyler in goalie pads and no one noticed then he skated over center ice, which is against the rules, and took a knuckle puck shot after about 20 seconds of setting up? And the Iceland coach yelled "DA GOALIE" but no one covered him regardless? This episode title is us saying that because we talked about goalies a lot. Pretty interesting stuff, I think. I'm good at movie references.

We are only saying nice things now because we think the teams we are talking about are the real good ones and that's why we're so nice to them. But also we're nice anyway. Joey swears a lot in this one and I can't control him!!!

Sorry this is a long one. We talk about a lot of stuff that's only a little related to our various rankings and Joey acts like all my bits, which are insanely good and perfect, are actually bad. Very disappointing, but what do you want? He went to UMass Amherst lmao.

It's been decided: The team we hate the most in college hockey is Bemidji. I already forget why we decided that and it's a joke reason but they're very bad now and I'm gonna beat up everyone I know who went there. Which is no one. Because everyone who ever went to Bemidji is serving consecutive life sentences for.... murder? Yeah, that works.

We're back. I don't know what else to tell you. Here's us talking about a bunch of bad teams and that's it folks!!!!!

There is way too much fooling around on this episode but we talk about like lots of important stuff. It's summer now. Lay off.

Well folks it's our last episode of the season and we talk about any old thing. Thanks for listening this year we love you. You specifically.

Yung Intelligence gets Joey Bada$$ Meloni on the horn from Chicago to chit chat about Thursday's games, the Hobey, the Richter, and the national title game.