Dealing and Feeling with Kathy Redwine

We are all dealing with a little more anxiety these days. Fear and uncertainty of our health, our job, and even the changes coming from day-to-day.  Kathy is joined by the irreverent and always entertaining Gina Trimarco, co-host of the Women Your Mother Warned You About podcast to help kick off a series on anxiety. To help educate and have real conversations about just what true anxiety means. How it can affect us, affect our kids, what can trigger it, how to live better with it and so much more. 

We live in a polarized country, and a conflict-filled world. But today on the show, Kathy welcomes a life-long friend who brings a world view to living more harmoniously together, no matter our differences.  Sahmil Idriss is the CEO of Search For Common Ground. Their organization works to move populations from an adversarial approach to cooperating solutions and community building. This happens on an even smaller scale when we strive to listen and better understand those with different views than us.  Plus! Hear a beautiful conversation from an 8-year-old about being a champion for those that are different from us. 

A lot of progress has been made in the past decade in respect to the acceptance and support of the LGBTQ+ community. But there is still a long way to go, and children growing up finding their way in a straight world, sometimes need a helping hand or listening ear. That's where today's guest comes in. Kathy welcomes O'Neal Atkinson, Deputy Director of Time Out Youth Center in Charlotte, NC. They have a delightful and engaging conversation about the center's role in helping LGBTQ+ youth through, advocacy, leadership development, social opportunities, counseling and more. They also discuss the use of preferred pronouns and language of respect for people in the community.  Plus! O'Neal talks about resources for parents and families who want to gain more understanding and connect with other parents who have similar stories.  Find out more about Time Out Youth here

As adults, we know that death and loss is a part of life, but for children it can be a difficult concept to understand. Today Kathy is joined by her friend Kiley Thiel, grief and loss expert, and part of the organization KinderMourn.  Kathy and Kiley discuss a range of traditional types of loss, including the death of a loved one, a friend and suicide. But they also discuss dealing with the loss of normalcy in the time of Coronavirus. They explain how our built in responses are hindered by the precautions we need to take, and explore alternative ways to cope. PLUS! Kiley tells us about resources and excellent reading materials that can help us support our kids and their understanding of this difficult topic.   Find out more about KinderMourn here Visit dealingandfeeling.com to find out more about Kathy and upcoming episodes

Today's guest, may just have the most well-rounded look at raising kids and all the issues that come along with it, than any guest before. Elizabeth Initrieri is a teacher, councilor and mother of three children in middle and high school.  Kathy and Liz have an engaging conversation about a whole range of topics that parents have to deal with and discuss with their children. From divorce, sex, gender issues, and social media - to the importance of listening, empathy, avoiding comparisons, and creating confidence. Lots to learn in this amazing episode!

In 2014, Liz Dyer had a dream that she could start a private Facebook group for moms of LGBTQ kids and those moms would end up helping to make the world a kinder, safer, more loving place for all LGBTQ people to live. Today that dream is a reality and filled with hundreds of members. She founded the Mama Bears organization to continue her work. Today she shares her journey from blogger to Bear and how to revolutionize the conversation around identity and sexuality with your kids.  The Mama Bears Organization supports, educates and empowers families with LGBTQ members and the LGBTQ community by providing private online communities for members to connect, ask questions and find resources. Find out more at realmamabears.org.

What do Will Smith, Simone Biles, Bill Gates and Albert Einstein all have in common (besides being famous)? They were all diagnosed with ADHD. Attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder is a chronic condition including attention difficulty, hyperactivity, and impulsiveness. ADHD often begins in childhood and can persist into adulthood. In this episode, Kathy discusses her own thoughts on dealing with and discussing feelings around the disorder within families. She also combats some common myths around the disorder.  ICYMI: Kathy interviewed ADHD expert Yafa Crane Luria in the previous episode.

Yafa Crane Luria has been and continues to be a visionary and innovator in the field of ADHD since 1984. She joins Kathy today for a discussion of her daily work with families with members who have ADHD, her own personal experience with it and her no yelling, no begging, no nagging philosophy of dealing with ADHD. Visit Yafa's website blockedtobrilliant.com to learn more about her and how's she's helping ADHD families who have tried nearly everything and are still frustrated and confused by their child’s or teen’s Blocked but Brilliant brain.

On this episode, we're talking about "talking about things." Kathy shares insights on developing practical healthy communication skills that lead to more productive interactions with our children. Human communication is rarely perfect, if ever. How do we guard against having unrealistic expectations of our children's communication skills? Kathy shares a template for clearly communicating our emotions between parents and kids OR between parents.  PLUS, when is the last time you asked for help? When is the last time your child asked for help? Communicating our need for help is critical to developing new skills. Too often shame gets in the way. Kathy helps get the conversation started so that everyone can get the help they deserve. 

Did you know that your body physically manifests feelings before we even recognize we're having them? How cool is that?! In this episode, Kathy gives you some tools to do the vital work of recognizing the physical cues associated with four major feelings: happy, sad, mad and worry. No matter what feelings you or your child is having, we're forced to deal with them. Kathy gives you some tips and strategies for dealing with them in ways that are healthy not harmful.

We're back with the roundtable and even MORE honest insights from parents on a variety of conversations they are having with their kids. Kathy is joined by former guests Molly Barker, Barb Royal, Laura Stevens and Colin Stevens to discuss topics including: racial identity, the power of word choice and providing kids with emotional stability.  Get a pen and paper ready to take some notes because you'll want to refer back to this episode. 

Wow, can you believe it? We've been in your podcast feeds for one year! To celebrate, we've invited a few of our favorite guests for a roundtable discussion on a variety of big issues parents and their children are dealing with. How do we talk to our kids about how to process their feelings in a way that builds confidence? What can we do to help our kids build their own narrative and prepare them to make their own decisions? PLUS! We play a game of "Who Said That?" featuring amazing insight from past episodes with Laura, Colin, Molly, and Barb. 

*This episode originally aired in June of 2020* Today's episode is dedicated to the LGBTQ community in celebration of Pride Month, which takes place throughout the month of June. Our guest is Barb Royal a mom, a wife, a woman, who is funny, raw and honest about her journey as a young gay person. It's a great opportunity for parents (and all adults) to listen to her struggles to come out and live out and see what we can learn from it. LGBTQ or not, all young people are trying to understand who they are, what they are, what they like, what they don't like and who they want to be. It's overwhelming and incredibly confusing. How we can be our children's allies as they are going through the process of young adulthood and the discovery that comes along with that?

Social media dominates so much of the conversation amongst our kids and their peers. It has effects on their self-esteem and self image that we're just beginning to understand. How do we talk to our kids about it.  My guest today is the amazing Molly Barker, author, triathlete, and founder of Girls on the Run, an organization dedicated to building the confidence of young girls through the sport of running. We discuss the incredible lessons she learned from her mother, that it's okay to be vulnerable in front of our kids, the effects of social media, and getting out of your own way. Visit dealingandfeeling.com for more information about upcoming episodes.

Raising a child through a separation or divorce can be very difficult, not to mention the process of blending familes as parents move on to new partners. On this episode Kathy is joined by Rachel Pitts, mom, real estate expert, divorcee and the co-host of the Women Your Mother Warned You About podcast, a podcast that is making business sexy again. She graciously shares her wisdom and positive outlook gained through her experience through all of these challenges.  

As we return to some semblance of normal, the changes that will take place could be just as jarring as the initial changes 1 year ago. How do we talk to our kids about going back to school and how do we get them and ourselves ready for a new routine. Kathy gives you 3 Keys to Preparing for Re-Entry. 

For people around the globe, the beginning of March 2021 represents a one year anniversary of when the COVID-19 pandemic became real and began to affect our lives. It wreaked havoc on the social, emotional and educational development of our children. Just how much havoc? That's what were starting to learn from recently released studies like the one from Challenge Success, a school reform non-profit affiliated with the Stanford Graduate School of Education. They teamed up with NBC News to conduct a large, national study to understand student well-being and academic engagement in these unsettled times. Join Kathy and her husband Chad as they discuss how to discuss both the upheaval and impending return to "normal."

Reading opens children's minds to the new and the possible. It's the perfect activity to introduce and educate them on different cultures. But what's out there beyond the Suess and the Goose? Our guest today is Bunmi Emenanjo, founder of the Atlas Book Club, a subscription service that provides parents with books and resources that develop global awareness and perspectives that increase empathy, compassion and acceptance. She says that providing our children with gateways to different cultures is one of the most important things that we can do for their development and reading makes it easy! Find out more about the Atlas Book Club here!

Kathy speaks to Ginina Swift, the mother of 5 year old Caden, who was diagnosed with end stage renal failure during the first months of his life. Listen to this powerful story of the struggles her son endured, how no parents are prepared for such a challenge, the blessing of dedicated nurses and doctors that listen, how isolating life became, and living life in the moment.  This episode was originally broadcast on September 24th, 2020. We are re-airing it with a special intro from Kathy in honor of the 4 year anniversary of Caden's transplant surgery and his kidney's 4th birthday!

"You know parents are the same no matter time nor place. They don't understand that us kids are going to make some mistakes. So to you, all the kids all across the land, there's no need to argue. Parents just don't understand" --Will Smith, Parents Just Don't Understand.  When "How was your day?" doesn't work anymore...how do we engage our kids? Kathy welcomes Kenzie Confer, a tutor, teaching assistant and speech and debate coach. Kenzie brings real insights to developing real and impactful conversations with children and young adults who have a variety of personality types. Kenzie and Kathy discuss actionable strategies that will build a foundation of conversation that you can build on each day.   

Join Kathy today in a personal and emotionally honest conversation with her guests, Laura and Colin Stevens. Colin met Laura in college where he played basketball, and the two discuss how their relationship grew. They continue speaking to Kathy about being parents and having difficult conversations dealing with race, stereotypes, identity, empathy, and navigating those honest talks with our kids.

This show is all about helping parents and kids through difficult conversations. Well today's show is about some very difficult subjects and luckily Kathy has Christy Keating here to make it a little easier.  Christy Keating is a former deputy prosecutor and now she is a speaker, parent coach and educator and sexual abuse prevention expert. Her website The Heartful Parent, is a goldmine of valuable information, education, and support in communicating with your children. Christy talks with Kathy about the child abuse materials, having "the talk," what consent really means, and much more. It's difficult thinking of your child as a sexual being, but the goal as parents is to have them feel empowered, safe and informed as they grow older and begin sexual relationships.  Find out more about Christy and The Heartful Parent here

You treat all of your kids the same right? Not so fast. Boys and girls are different in many ways, and how they communicate and react is just the beginning. Janet Allison spent years of tireless work and research to bring incredible insight into the development and positive interaction with boys.  Kathy welcomes Janet, the founder of Boys Alive, a phenomenal resource in how to best communicate with our sons, boys in class and even our dads. They delve deep into issues of how to best understand and unlock the way boys operate at home and at school. From feelings of anger, being "bad" or maturing at a different pace. Janet gives deep insights into how best to balance boys' place in the world.  Find out more about Janet and Boys Alive here  

Adoption is a gift to both couples and children. But this gift can come with unexpected challenges for all involved, and parents can often find themselves without the resources to help guide them through the hurdles they face.  Kathy welcomes Sara Cole, an adoptive parent coach, to today's show to help direct parents in a positive and secure path for both them and their adopted children.  Find out more about Sara here 

In our society we often divide people into those we view as "normal" and those that are different, challenging, or disruptive. But today's guest has devoted herself to changing our preconceived notions of "normal." Debbie Reber is the author of the incredible book, Differently Wired: Raising an Exceptional Child in a Conventional World.  She is also the creator of Tilt Parenting, providing parents and families a wellspring of resources and education on successfully raising kids that may be "differently wired." Debbie reminds us that 20% of people have some sort of neurological atypicality, and these differences need to embraced instead of fixed.  Find out more about Debbie and Tilt Parenting here 

This episode is releasing December 31st, 2020 and I think many of us are ready to kick this year in the rear! But before we do I'd like to express gratitude to the people that have made this year bearable, to the people who have to endure unthinkable loss and done it with grace and courage and express some hope for our future. Thank you for listening to Dealing and Feeling in 2020 and we can't wait to help you have better conversations with your family in 2021. 

We live in a polarized country, and a conflict-filled world. But today on the show, Kathy welcomes a life-long friend who brings a world view to living more harmoniously together, no matter our differences.  This episode originally aired July 16th, 2020 Sahmil Idriss is the CEO of Search For Common Ground. Their organization works to move populations from an adversarial approach to cooperating solutions and community building. This happens on an even smaller scale when we strive to listen and better understand those with different views than  us.  Plus! Hear a beautiful conversation from an 8 year old about being a champion for those that are different from us. 

You cannot miss today's episode. Every listener has a connection with someone in the LGBTQA+ community, or they will at some point in their lives. Often people can be a bit hesitant or worried that they may not use the right terms when talking about someone who is transgender or non-binary, etc...  Today's guest is here to bring some clarity and confidence to parents out there, with his book - The Pride Guide: A Guide to Sexual and Social Health for LGBTQ Youth. LGBTQ kids are so much more susceptible to bullying, depression, suicide, anxiety and more. And often that stems from how the people they are closest to in their lives accept them and treat them. This guide helps to make giving respect, love and understanding much easier, and could be life changing for families with LGBTQ children.  Find out more about the Pride Guide here

Today is another fun episode with the Redwine family, talking about a complex emotion - anger. We all feel it in varying degrees, and some deal with it responsibly and others have absolutely no control of it.  Kathy and her family talk about the many facets of anger and how it can effect our bodies, health, relationships and kids. Kathy explains the importance of modeling appropriate actions with our children when anger may arise. 

Have you ever caught your pre-schooler playing doctor with a friend and just yelled "Stop doing that!!!" and then never spoke about it again? Well you're not alone. But what do you say? What do you do? Kathy's guest today is here to give you all the information you need to know. Amy Lang is the author of Birds and Bees and Your Kids, and is a resource like none other on this subject.  From birth to five years old, kids have a lot of curiosity about private parts. Their own, and yes, others. This may come out in spontaneous play, and it is important to remember that this is a natural part of development and how we react and communicate with our children at this stage, lays the groundwork for keeping an open dialogue on sexuality as they grow older.  Find out more about Amy Lang The Birds and Bees Solution Center here. Don't miss 15% off with code - FEELING

On a special edition of Dealing and Feeling, host Kathy Redwine journals her own family's recent experience with COVID-19. Kathy digs deep into the many conflicting emotions that come with receiving a positive test, the isolation that follows, and a long road to recovery. Anxiety, disappointment, sadness, loneliness. These are feelings that thousands of families across our country and world are feeling. On this Thanksgiving holiday, Kathy gives thanks for silver linings and the strength provided by her family and friends. Thank you for your continued support of the show and Happy Thanksgiving. For the most up to date information on COVID-19 please visit cdc.gov.

This episode originally aired August 13th, 2020. It features a special introduction from Kathy.  Welcome back to the third installment of the deep dive into the subject of anxiety. Today, Kathy and Gina Trimarco discuss how to best support those that are dealing with anxiety.  They go through the top things not to say, and that are least helpful, and also flip that around and discuss that even small changes in language or behavior with someone struggling, can make a world of difference. 

A cell phone is a good way for kids to talk and text with friends, look up information for school, or watch some funny videos. But along with that, we are giving our kids a concentration robber, a perfectly designed self-comparison machine, and an unlimited pornography portal.  To break all that down, Kathy has invited Max Stossel, a lauded poet, filmmaker, author and the Head of Education & Content for the Center for Humane Technology. They have a frank discussion about social media and its effect on our children. They also focus on the hopeful aspects of communities working together to become more aware and responsible with technology. Also the importance of parents to be educated and to have those difficult conversations with kids, that lead to them making healthy decisions.  Learn more about Max and The Center For Humane Technology here

ATTENTION! This episode is suitable for adults only.  Today's guest is Jessa Zimmerman. She is a mental health counselor, certified sex therapist, and author of ,Sex Without Stress.' Kathy and Jessa have an in depth conversation on the dynamic between sex and a healthy relationship, and vice versa.  They discuss intimacy, communication, differing sexual desire, expectations, avoidance, the evolution of sex in relationships and much more. They also talk about the importance of modeling positive interaction in our relationships for our kids. 

We all want our children to become the best adults they can be. But it doesn't happen by chance. Your communication and parenting behavior when they are young makes the difference, and no time period is more important than the middle school years.  Today, Kathy welcomes Michelle Icard, Founder of Athena's Path, and author of The Middle School Makeover, and 14 Talks By Age 14. They discuss how to let our kids gain independence and to fail, better ways to listen, and how to keep conversations going when they are starting to pull away. So sit back and hear some amazing insights on how to raise strong, independent, resilient young adults. 

"The talk." Every parent is excited about it right? If that doesn't describe your feelings on the subject, today's episode is one that you can't miss. Kathy welcomes Trish Hutchison, co-founder of Girlology, the most comprehensive online resource for health education solutions for girls and parents. They cover subjects ranging from relationships, puberty, sexting, vaping, periods, physical development, pornography, masturbation and handling emotions. Those are some difficult conversations.  But Trish and Kathy discuss many of them here today, and you will be thankful for listening. They talk in depth about when to start talking about these topics with your kids, what terms to use, how to find opportunities to start conversations, how to be non-judgmental and avoid shame, and most importantly, making yourself the go to person for your child and not Google.  Find out more about Trish and Girlology here  

Welcome to the Redwine Family Hour Part 2! This week Kathy has brought back her entire family for more discussion and fun talking about real issues that kids, parents and families deal with.  Today the group talks about the amount of attention people give to their phones, and the impact that has on how they connect with family, friends and co-workers. They also have an enlightening conversation about how her family thinks about their own mental health, and how to best encourage children to open up about their feelings that may otherwise get held inside. 

Today is a totally different type of show, and it's one that is great to have your kids join in and listen to. This is the first of a two part series and Kathy's guests today are even more special than usual, because they are her family! Her husband and children join in the conversation about how adults and kids view mental health and emotional well-being, and how they feel it effects them at home, work, school or with peers.  They also talk about communication within the family and how our reaction to other people's actions can ultimately effect our own.

Today's episode is unique and interesting because of the arc of the guest's story. Kathy welcomes Kimmay Caldwell to the show. Her journey started as a bra-fitter in New York City, and she found that almost every women she fit, had negative things to say about their body and themselves. And she realized that she was having those same conversations in her head. So she decided to change the negative talk within her and help others do the same. And so, Hurray Kimmay was born. Her company is not only the go-to spot for the best bra fitting and information around, but a place offering people support in positive self-care and esteem. She and Kathy have a broader discussion on self-worth, and what it means to be loved and accepted. Also giving tips to parents on how to provide our children with positive examples and discussions to help them avoid body negativity. Above all Kimmay's goal is to help you get out of your way and say - HURRAY! Find out more about Hurray Kimmay here

Today's episode is a powerful and emotional one. Kathy speaks to Ginina Swift, a mother of a five year old son that was diagnosed with end stage renal failure during the first months of his life.  Kathy and Ginina talk about the struggles of her son's first five years, how no parents are prepared for such a challenge, the blessing of dedicated nurses and doctors that listen, how isolating life became, and living life in the moment. 

Today, Kathy welcomes a very special guest, Scilla Andreen, producer, director, co-founder and CEO of IndieFlix Foundation, and advocate for mental health. Scilla and IndieFlix is dedicated to bring stories that inspire change and positive action. The documentary focused films cover topics like cyber-bullying, anxiety, sexual harassment and social media. Most importantly they are a launching point to talk with other adults and our kids about these difficult subjects.  Find out more about Scilla and IndieFlix here

Financial pressures bring stress, anxiety, relationship troubles, and instability. Wouldn't it be great if our kids could avoid those challenges? Well its possible, but it takes work, education and responsibility. Enter Kathy's guest for today's show, Alan Powdermaker, author of the book, Journeys with Max: Life Skills for Young People-Understanding Money. It is a wonderful book outlining the basics of financial literacy for our children. Alan also discusses allowances, reward and consequences, how to lead by positive example, and the powerful concept of save, spend and share.  Find Journeys With Max on ebook now

Vanita Halliburton lost her 19 year old son to suicide. That may be shocking and many people think that it's something that would never touch their lives. But the truth is that suicide is the second leading cause of death for people ages 10 to 34.  Vanita didn't let tragedy destroy her. She found strength and purpose and started the Grant Halliburton Foundation, educating people on mental health and suicide prevention, so they would never have to go through what she or her son did. Last year alone, the foundation trained over 50,000 students, parents, teachers and mental health professionals on suicide awareness and prevention. This is a special episode that shows an amazing example of light breaking through the darkness.   Learn more about The Grant Halliburton Foundation here

Today Kathy welcomes a very special guest. Zola Budd, South African, record breaking barefoot runner joins the conversation. Zola is the subject of a new hour long special on TLC called "When Fate Collides," about the infamous race in the 1984 Olympic Games.  Zola talks with Kathy about how becoming a running phenom took a part of her and her innocence. How she struggled to meet expectations while battling anxiety and depression. Don't miss this amazing episode!

It's been an incredible month discussing the complex issue of anxiety. Kathy and Gina sit down again, to continue their discussion of what actions and statements to avoid when you are trying to help someone through moments of high anxiety.  While there are many things that you can say that may be counterproductive, more often than not, the simple action of staying by someone's side, reassuring them that you are there for anything they need, when they are ready, is the best support of all.

Welcome back to the third installment of the deep dive into the subject of anxiety. Today, Kathy and Gina Trimarco discuss how to best support those that are dealing with anxiety.  They go through the top things not to say, and that are least helpful, and also flip that around and discuss that even small changes in language or behavior with someone struggling, can make a world of difference. 

Your brain is a powerful thing. It is at the center of everything our bodies do, and is also the core of our emotional makeup. On this second installment in the series on anxiety, Kathy and her friend Gina Trimarco, of the Women Your Mother Warned You About Podcast, talk about the interplay of anxiety and your brain.  They discuss how mental health often takes a back set to our physical health, and how we need to have conversations with our kids that helps them be comfortable discussing the issue. Also, how often anxiety and other mental health issues are too often dismissed or minimized by friends, or even doctors.  All this, along with some great personal stories that will help you to relate and feel heard. 

We are all dealing with a little more anxiety these days. Fear and uncertainty of our health, our job, and even the changes coming from day to day.  Kathy is joined by the irreverent and always entertaining Gina Trimarco, co-host of the Women Your Mother Warned You About podcast to help kick off a series on anxiety. To help educate and have real conversations about just what true anxiety means. How it can effect us, effect our kids, what can trigger it, how to live better with it and so much more. 

Today Kathy welcomes a young guest named Jessica that wrote an incredibly powerful poem about some difficult topics. Jessica's poem talks about anxiety and depression, racism, interracial relationships and the stigma and leering attention that it can still bring.  Kathy and Jessica also talk about how to help these situations, how Jessica has remained a bright shining light in a world that can sometimes bring so much darkness. And how leading with consideration and kindness is a good place to start. 

We live in a polarized country, and a conflict-filled world. But today on the show, Kathy welcomes a life-long friend who brings a world view to living more harmoniously together, no matter our differences.  Sahmil Idriss is the CEO of Search For Common Ground. Their organization works to move populations from an adversarial approach to cooperating solutions and community building. This happens on an even smaller scale when we strive to listen and better understand those with different views than  us.  Plus! Hear a beautiful conversation from an 8 year old about being a champion for those that are different from us. 

In the last decade, suicide rates for young people have tripled. When this devastating event happens, especially involving a child, it can be difficult for a family to know what to do or where to turn.  Today, Kathy welcomes Jason Dyke, who lost his son to suicide. After experiencing this firsthand, he started an amazing resource to help other families - Carson's Village.  Jason has a heartfelt conversation about how this organization helps to listen, guide, answer questions, make arrangements, provide follow-up, raise money, and provide tools for families in their darkest hour.