Question Your Garden

This isn't just about my birthday, for the record. If you know folks with "special" birthdays, have a listen. It's important to make sure that they know they exist outside of calendar holidays too.

I know you've heard "the eyes are the gateway to the soul." Here, I chat about what it means and how to possibly experience the breadth of this euphemism for yourself.

The stress of obtaining a career-related certification was weighing heavily on me, but I didn't realize just how much! It caused enough stress to slow me down on producing other content for the podcast, so, I HAD to get this out. 

Today, I just want to spend a little time talking about the dogs that have impacted me in my early years, likely giving me the push I needed to make it through the bullshit.

Your childhood matters a LOT. I don't think emotional neglect is talked about enough and for that reason, I've been pretty blind to it. Also, I get into some discussion on attachment in this episode, so be sure to check out the blog for links mentioned in the show! 

We create core beliefs as we grow up, to help us navigate through life. Sometimes, they're outdated and harmful. Join me as I do a bit of exploration with some that are front and center in my life, daily.

In my head, I always thought "fear of intimacy" meant "fear of love." It's SOOOO much more than that…This episode isn't an exhaustive look at the topic, but there may be a few nuggets that you can relate to.

 Have you explored the reasons why you quit things, or abandon your dreams? Do you "not try" to reach your dreams? Here, I take some time to dive into things that have halted me in my tracks. Can you relate?

A synopsis - many of us are in abusive relationships with ourselves. Negative self-talk is one of the worst things we can do to ourselves, but - we keep doing it! It's time to start asking ourselves some hard questions and to poke holes in the things we habitually tell ourselves.

Growing up in the house of hoarders made making friends and maintaining relationships tough. Shame also took root and grew happily there. From clutter, to trash, to roaches, to other health hazards, and unfair expectations – it wasn't fun. See more links on the blog at questionyourgarden.blogspot.com

You guys know who you are...You don't ask for help. You don't see a reason to ask for help. You may have even asked for help in the past and were left empty-handed. I hear you. I see you.  And while I don't have all the answers for you, with a little hive mind inquiry I think a likely culprit was discovered – obligation.

Feeling some stress about attending some upcoming family functions? You don't have to attend, just in case you needed to hear it from someone else. It's okay to take care of YOU above others, especially during the holidays and especially if your sanity depends on it. 

If you're sensitive to the topic of sexual abuse, you may want to skip this episode. This is for any other survivor out there so that they know that they aren't alone, and that they too, can share their story when they're damn good and ready to. I support you. I believe you. Visit questionyourgarden.blogspot.com for additional links. 

How many times have you chosen to silence yourself out of fear of judgement or even oppression? Did you know that sometimes, simply speaking up to the right audience can encourage someone else to take action? Someone else out there wants and needs to hear your words. Let's take a look at what it might be like to find our voice and shed the fears, at least enough to speak.

Man...is neutrality ever a comfortable place, or what? Riding the line of opinion, being able to just blend in and not be noticed for holding a strong opinion on something, one way or another. There's nothing defining in neutrality, yet so many of us are content to exist there. Sometimes...many times, it's okay to "not get along." We really should spend more time embracing our differences.

As Emily Nagoski notes in her book, "Come As You Are", "We've locked ourselves, culturally, into our own fear, rage, and despair." See, we learn, somehow someway at a young age to inhibit ourselves so we better fit in – so we can survive. In this episode, I explore some of the nefariousness that emotion stuffing has contributed to in my life. 

Your body remembers things, even if you don’t. Did you know that trauma can manifest itself through your body shaking, like an involuntary response? In this episode, I chat a bit about the book, The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk and stress response cycles that could be impacting you in ways you're not even aware of! 

Here, I explain my perspective of the metaphorical garden (big thanks to Emily Nagoski!) and the overall goals for this podcast. Even though I'm exploring my own healing, I feel sharing my own struggles may help others. So, have a listen and stick around for more! I've got some meaty topics lined up and I'm excited about getting to them!